Two Snapes and a Ginger
Against his true wishes, Professor McGonagall led Loki back to the Defense Against the Dark Arts class. What he really wanted to do … was break into the doorless room. Technically, it wouldn't cause any real trouble since he was supposed to be there. He had a hard time believing in its existence anyhow. The aloof girl didn't provide any new information regarding the crime either. He was contemplating going back, when Minerva closed the door to the classroom behind him. All the windows were clamped firmly shut, creating an eerie atmosphere. A single projector gave the only source of light. For a split second, he thought he had somehow walked through one of the TVA's orange portal doors and into a time theater if not for the students, except they were seated in desks rather than staggering about. Loki scanned the room and recognized a few familiar faces; the skittish Neville, the weasley Malfoy, and of course the three mischievous scamps, Ron, Harry, and Hermione. Their impressions were moving into his memory banks like uninvited house guests. However, the one guest he did not see was Mobius' wizard look-alike, Lupin. Instead, he was met with a most unpleasant substitute.
"Turn to page 394." it said. Loki looked up to find the man the Neville boy feared, the one that had an uncanny resemblance to him, minus some obvious facial features. He squinted his eyes at the black haired man covered from wrist, to toe, to neck in nothing but black. Loki wasn't sure if he was real or just a bad joke.
"Hello … I don't believe we've been properly introduced?" the Trickster asked politely with a charming, yet not so friendly smile. Malfoy rolled his eyes, but kept quiet and out of Loki's line of sight. Neville mustered up the courage to turn around in his seat to get a better look.
"No … we have not," he said as if he could care less. Severus wrote something on the chalkboard before addressing him, taking his time. Loki didn't appreciate him making him wait for a clearer answer. The potions master turned away from the board, folding his covered arms carefully one over the other, finally acknowledging the Tricker's presence. Loki could not help but notice that he had written, 'werewolf,' a curious word.
"I am Professor Snape … and I will be teaching class … this evening," he said in his slow paced, well-spoken manner of speaking that surprisingly seemed to bewitch people from interrupting him and command their attention. Loki scoffed.
"Is that right? And where is Professor Lupin?" the Trickster asked, completely dismissing his authority. Loki realized had been kept well informed of meetings and changes until now. Harry wanted an answer to that question as well. He was sure the last thing he and some of the other students wanted was a double dose of their smug potions master.
"Professor Lupin finds himself incapable of teaching … at the present moment … so your services will not be needed," snarked Snape. Loki put his hands in his pockets.
"Is that so?" Loki's voice, confident and challenging, cut through the tension in the room. He could see how Snape might intimidate a student, but he was, as Mobius might say, 'a little pussycat' to the God of Mischief.
"Then you wouldn't mind if I observed another professor's teaching methods. I am a learning assistant, after all," he said cleverly with sarcasm disguised by politeness. The air in the room grew thin. Harry could have sworn he saw a flicker of anger behind Snape's expressionless, black eyes.
"If ... you ... must," said Snape, obviously irritated. Ron snickered. In the back of the class, Loki assumed a seat, arms crossed and feet propped on the desk, the picture of a disobedient student. If looks could kill, the entire classroom would have been obliterated by the impact of Snape's and Loki's death glares. Harry subconsciously rooted for Lupin's assistant to win.
"Turn to page 394." said Snape before breaking their intense eye contact. It took a moment for the students to react. Snape whipped out his wand and pointed at Ron's book, forcing it open to page 394. The redhead flinched.
"Werewolves"? questioned Ron.
"Sir, we just learned about red caps and hinkypunks. We're not meant to start that for weeks." complained Hermione.
"Quiet." demanded Snape. Loki made his gaze tighter.
"Now, which one of you can tell me the difference... between an Animagus and a werewolf?" asked Snape. Hermione vigorously raised her hand. Loki wondered why Snape would not select her.
"No one? ... How disappointing." said Snape sarcastically. Furry burned in Loki's chest.
"Please, sir. An Animagus is a wizard who elects to turn into an animal. A werewolf has no choice. With each full moon... he no longer remembers who he is. He'd kill his best friend. Furthermore, the werewolf only responds to the call of its own kind." she answered, which to Loki's surprise he did find interesting. Suddenly, Malfoy howled like a wolf to mock her. Loki was usually an advocate for such mischief, but he was glad she had previously punched him in the face.
"Thank you, Mr. Malfoy ... That's the second time... you've spoken out of turn, Miss Granger. Are you incapable of restraining yourself... or do you take pride in being an insufferable know-it-all?" snapped Snape.
"He's got a point, you know." whispered Ron.
"Five points from Gryffindor." demanded Snape. A scowl etched across Loki's face, a mixture of irritation and disdain evident in his narrowed eyes.
"Rude," the Trickster blurted out over the classroom.
Snape shot him another death glare.
"That was one of the most insightful things I've heard all day, and you punish her for it?" retorted Loki. Silence descended upon the class like a heavy shroud, broken only by the soft rustle of parchment. Stunned, Hermione attempted to hide her smirk.
"Well now ... As an antidote to your ignorance, I could give them more work on the subject matter Mr. Laufeyson ... I'm sure Ms. Granger would be happy to tell you all about it," said Snape in a quiet yet threatening manner. The class groaned. However, Snape's threat produced an opposite effect.
"Work? How dreadfully boring," said Loki, disappointed.
"Oh bloody hell here we go," whispered Ron, worried about his next choice of words.
"If you must drown them in parchment, might I suggest a topic that doesn't put the entire class to sleep? How about the intricate art of tea brewing? Or the riveting history of napkin-folding spells? Let's not burden young minds unnecessarily, Professor Snape. We wouldn't want to stifle their creativity, would we?" Loki smirked, his eyes gleaming with mischief. Little quiet laughters and gasps rippled through the classroom. Hermione's mouth fell right open, feeling tainted by his previous support.
"Is he trying to provoke him?" she hissed to her friends.
"Who cares!" Ron whispered with far too much enjoyment. In all the years Harry had known Snape, he never met anyone who could draw out a sliver of expression from Snape's face, even if it was a bad one. Severus stepped dangerously closer to him with two audible foot steps that silenced the rest of the students.
"Mr. Laufeyson ... need I remind you ... that you are nothing more than on loan ... to this school ... "began Snape. Malfoy grinned, waiting anxiously for the head of Slytherin to deliver justice. Loki swept his feet from the desk and stood up with a subtle defiance as he straightened, a slow smirk dancing on his lips. "Loaned or not, I've always believed in making a lasting impression." The remark hung in the air. Ron snickered.
"I think he's already done that," the redhead quietly snarked. Hermione snuck her signature elbow in his side. Neville and Harry, on the other hand, were enthralled, and could not take their eyes off him. Suddenly, Loki broke into a soft cackle, his ego getting the better of him. "I mean … is that really the best you can do?" he finished. Harry could not help but feel that Mr. Laufeyson was implying something. Swiftly, Snape drew his wand, casting a spell to open the door behind Loki. Light from outside flooded the room harshly, torturing their eyes.
"Expelliamous!" yelled Snape, casting a second spelling, throwing Loki out of the classroom. The Trickster flew backwards and hit the stone wall hard, flopping him to the floor. Instantly, Snape shut the door with another wave of his wand and locked it. Loki pushed himself half way up, and flicked his black hair out of his face.
"Damn it," he said. He could hear his lesser doppelganger from inside barking orders at them.
"On my desk, by Monday morning... two rolls of parchment on the werewolf, with emphasis... on recognizing it!"
Loki wanted to storm back into the classroom when two pairs of helping arms peeled him off the ground.
"You alright, mate?" asked the tall redhead to Loki's right, a concerned expression on his long face. The one on his left, identical in every aspect, chuckled. "You took quite the tumble."
Loki's lips parted in confusion. He whipped his head from right to left a few times before completely ripping himself from them. Loki backed away to get a bigger picture with his arms and hands up defensively while frantically shifting his eyes from one person to the other.
"Whoa, mate!" said the tall ginger on the right with his hands up in surrender.
"We mean no harm," said the other tall ginger on the left with no hands raised.
"Hey, aren't you the one who destroyed an entire classroom?" said the one on the right gleefully, pointing one of his raised hands at him.
"And walked away without a scratch!" said the one on the left. Loki's eyes kept bouncing from one to the other as the twins spoke in unison as if they were one person.
"What are you? An illusion?" he asked quickly. They chuckled mischievously to themselves.
"No, we're identical," they said together in perfect stereo. Loki blinked his eyes several times and shook his head. They grinned at each other.
"And Ronald said he was mental," the right whispered to the left, doubtfully.
"Reckon he still might be," the left said to the right, eying him suspiciously as if he had plans for the Trickster.
"Ronald? As in that flame haired buffoon?" Loki questioned, somewhat lowering his hands. The only other ginger he had encountered belonged to the trio of scamps. There was no denying a family resemblance. The twins chuckled.
"That's the one," they said in unison again.
"Ron's our younger brother," one of them said separately.
"In your Defense Against the Dark Arts class," said the other, completely his twin's sentence. If Loki closed his eyes, he could have sworn he was talking to one person, but he dared not, for fear he might lose his mind.
Opening his palms towards each of them, Loki questioned, "And … you two are?"
Fred extended his right hand. "Oh, I'm Fred!"
George, shaking Loki's left hand, added, "I'm George." Loki involuntarily shook their hands, his wide emerald eyes darting from one to the other. Perhaps he did hit the wall too hard, he wondered. The identical ginger brothers released him.
"You must be Mr. Laufeyson," said George.
"Yeah, and from what we hear, you've got a twin of your own," said Fred mischievously. Loki glanced at the locked door to the classroom containing the condescending bully, before pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Old Severus Snape himself," said George. Loki did not want to know how many people made that quick connection.
"Comparing me to that drawl, big nosed dunce … It's absurd," Loki hissed angrily to himself, nearly forgetting his main mission.
"But just between us, you are far more interesting," whispered Fred.
"Well anyone is more interesting than that brooding old git," argued George.
"Yeah, but it's not everyday that a man can destroy the school and live! And get away with it!" retorted Fred. Loki scrunched his face and kept his eyes shut tight behind his hand still pinching his nose, attempting to drown out their noise. Now they sounded like one lunatic arguing with themselves.
Loki dropped his hand from his face.
"Ok, ok, stop stop stop … Severus? ... What do you know about him?" he probed, refocusing on one topic.
"He's the potions master at this school," said Fred.
"He's not really liked, except by the Slytherins of course," said George. Loki was not particularly fond of those words in that sentence, especially since he didn't recognize one of them.
"Slytherins?" asked Loki.
"Yeah, he's the head of Slytherin in fact ... look," said Fred pointing to an emblem on his robes. It depicted the lion in red and yellow he had seen some of the students wear, including the infamous trio. Loki recalled the sigil on the dead boy's robes, but it didn't match theirs.
"We belong to Gryffindor house," he continued, "There are four of them that make up this school."
"Ravenclaw," said George.
"Hufflepuff," said Fred.
"Gryffindor," said George.
"And Slytherin" they said together. Loki felt the need to sit down. A past memory of mischief bubbled to the surface when he pranked his brother with several duplications of himself.
"God now I know why Thor found that so annoying," he mumbled to himself. The twins exchanged confused looks.
"Who?" they asked in duet.
"No one, nevermind ... then why is he teaching the Defense Against the Dark Arts?" asked Loki.
"He shouldn't be ... unless Professor Lupin was ill or preoccupied, but then, shouldn't you be teaching the class?" one of the twins said. Loki glared at the locked door once more. The Trickster couldn't shake the feeling that something more was afoot at Hogwarts.
"Indeed ... " Loki pondered.