AN: I'm honestly surprised that I managed to get this chapter out so quickly. Thanks for all the kudos, comments, bookmarks, etc. It really means a lot to me! This chapter is a flashback to the Rinne-Festival. Fair warning, this chapter has no smut and is pure pain. I highly recommend listening to Hinata's character song Fuyu no Owari ni: At Winter's End before or while reading this

chapter. It literally makes my heart break for her.

Tiny specks of snow fluttered through the frigid winter air. A quiet stillness engulfed the village of Konoha, most inhabitants sleeping at this late hour, except for one.

Hinata walked slowly, snow crunching under her boots as she wrestled with her thoughts. Her mind was conflicted as was her heart. It had been like this ever since she slept with Naruto.

It surely didn't help that tonight reminded her of that fateful night eight years ago…

Rinne Festival Eight Years Ago…

Hinata painstakingly knitted a red scarf that resembled the one Naruto wore when he was a child. His scarf was destroyed when he protected her from those older boys who were bullying her.

Her heart immediately latched onto the brave boy, her savior, her crush.

After that day, he became her classmate. Of course, she was much too shy to approach him. But, she had watched him, watched as he made mischief, watched as he got scolded countless times by Iruka-sensei.

Hinata watched him fail time and time again just like she did. They were both failures. Unlike her, Naruto didn't cry or quit when he failed. He got back up every single time. He was a proud failure.

He never gave up, he never went back on his word, that was ninja way. He was her inspiration. She wanted to be strong like him, to be brave like him.

She knew deep in her heart that Naruto would succeed, that he would be the strongest shinobi. That he would become Hokage. She believed in him, in that bright eyed boy that everyone hated.

Hinata wished that she was brave enough to talk to him. She wished that her quiet cheers would reach him, even though she knew that it would be drowned out by the loud cheers for sasuke.

He never noticed her but it wasn't his fault, no one ever noticed her. She was invisible everywhere she went except for inside the Hyuga household. That's the one place she wished no one would notice her.

Instead, she was looked at with disdain, sometimes pity. Her father's cold hard eyes looked at her with disappointment, like she was a worthless excuse for a daughter.

Neji-nisan looked at her with pure hatred once his father died. Hanabi used to look at her with admiration until she started beating her in sparring matches. Then her precious little sister looked at her the same way her father did.

That's why Naruto's pure smile saved her. Even though it wasn't directed at her, she felt her chest swell with warmth. He was the sun, shining so warm and bright. She wanted to bask in his light. She wanted to reach out and touch him but he was always out of reach.

For the longest time her hands could never reach him. He was always moving forward, his shining blue eyes would never look back at her. Why would they? She was invisible. She was not like the girl that held his affection.

But, on the day of the Chunin exams, he noticed her. He cheered for her, he believed in her and she started to believe in herself. Her heart seized, on the verge of death but it didn't matter, she finally got his attention. She felt herself change for the better, even if she almost died.

After that, things got better. Neji-nisan was her big brother again. Her father still looked at her with disappointment but he was less cruel than before. Even Hanabi wanted to spend more time with her.

Naruto changed the Hyuga. Naruto became her friend. It was more than she could have ever dreamed of. She supported him as a friend and held onto her feelings as the years passed.

Well she did until Pain had him pinned down. Hinata couldn't stand back and watch Naruto die. It didn't matter that she was no match for Pain. She had to do something. She had to protect him. Maybe a selfish part of her wanted him to see her.

She rushed to the field and confessed her feelings for him. She told him that she loved him. She was utterly outmatched and could only hear him screaming her name as the blood pounded in her ears, as she was launched high into the air, then harshly slammed down and viciously stabbed through the chest.

In her final moments, she would only hope that her intervention had bought Naruto enough time. That it would be enough to help him regain his strength.

She survived... He survived…

Everyone did, all thanks to Naruto.

She could only cry in relief as Naruto came back to the village after defeating Pain.

The entire village cheered for him. He was their hero. He deserved their acknowledgement after everything he's been through.

Sakura hugged him tightly. He deserved that too…

She didn't expect anything by confessing… She just wanted him to know her feelings before she died… So why did her chest hurt so much?

A lot happened afterwards and they didn't speak again until the war.

Then she did it again. She jumped in front of Naruto, planning to die for him again.

Last time, Kiba had held her tightly as she sat on a bed in the medical tent. His arms almost crushing her, crying his eyes out, telling her not to do that ever again. Pleading with her to promise him that she would never do that again. Akamaru whimpering with his head on her lap and kind, quiet Shino, wrapping his arms around her, tears flowing down his face as he quietly pleaded, "Please Hinata, don't-…"

They knew. They knew why she did it.

The rest of the village thought she was being brave, protecting the will of fire, but Kiba and Shino knew. They knew that she would die a hundred times for the boy she loved.

All she could do was say sorry, tears flowing down her cheeks. She didn't apologize for what she did, but for the fact that she would do it again and they knew. They always knew.

This time, she waited for the feeling of spears piercing through her body, for the searing pain of death.

Nothing came…

Neji took the attack for her because he loved her, his little sister…

Hinata wanted nothing more than to die in his place… But she couldn't.

Neji would never forgive her if she gave up and reverted to her old self. So, she stood strong, encouraging Naruto to fight with her because giving up would mean that Neji died for nothing.

After that, Naruto and Hinata grew closer as friends. Their shared grief bringing them together. They spent more time together afterwards. They hung out daily, whenever they didn't have any missions.

Hinata could meet his gaze as a friend without shying away, the way she used to. They talked a lot. It was easy to just talk to Naruto, to be his friend. But… her heart disagreed.

She knew her love couldn't be requited. She knew that he only saw her as a friend but her heart couldn't stop yearning for his affection. She couldn't hide her feelings anymore.

That's why she decided that she would convey the feelings she held for Naruto through her handwoven scarf. It would be a symbol of her enduring love for him. A love that lasted since she was a little girl blushing at her savior, to now, when she was a confident young woman, a jonin level shinobi, who had survived a brutal war alongside Naruto.

All her friends knew what she was planning and they all encouraged her. Sakura and Ino were confident that Hinata could win Naruto's heart. Kiba and Shino gave her their blessing with Kiba adding that "Naruto would be an idiot to reject her."

Hinata felt confident in herself, more confident than ever before.

After weeks of pouring her heart into the scarf, she decided that she would give it to Naruto on the day of the Rinne-Festival.

All her confidence left her when she saw him at Sakura's Rinne-Festival party. He was dressed casually in his favorite hoodie and sweatpants but he looked as handsome as ever.

She was dressed casually as well, something that Hanabi teased her about as she left to go to the party.

"Onee-chan, don't you think Naruto would like you more if you dressed more fashionably instead of knitting him a scarf?"

Hinata ignored her sister but a part of her wondered if she was right.

Naruto immediately came up to greet her, a large smile on his face, "Hinata! What's up?"

His smile was so bright, her heart squeezed. She reverted to that 12 year old girl who couldn't speak to Naruto without stuttering and blushing.

"N-Naruto-Kun, Hi.." Hinata shyly looked down, she felt her cheeks heating up embarrassingly. Her hands clutched tightly onto the bag in her arms.

Immediately, he looked concerned, his face leaning down to closely examine her, "Are you okay, Hinata? Are you feeling okay? Did you eat something bad?"

His hand touched her forehead and her face heated up further then he nodded to himself "Yeah you're definitely hot. Do you want me to take you to the doctor?"

Her face turned cherry red, her blush reaching her ears. Naruto was so close and he was so kind. Her heart wouldn't stop fluttering against her chest.

"N-no, i'm fine Naruto-kun." He looked at her unsurely.

"R-really i'm fine. It's just hot in here." Hinata stuttered out lamely, but he seemed relieved.

His expression relaxed and Naruto chuckled "Good, you had me worried there for a sec. You should take off some of your clothes if you're too warm." He gestured to her outfit. She had on multiple layers due to the cold weather.

She knew he meant it innocently but her face broke out into a full blush again. "Ah, that's a good idea, Naruto-kun."

"Yeah i'm super smart sometimes -dattebayo!" Naruto said goodnaturedly with a wide grin.

Hinata giggled cutely, her eyes closing and her hand covering up her mouth, "You are." She meant it too.

Naruto made his rounds, greeting all his friends. Hinata watched him in adoration, as he lit up the room.

"You're so hot, Hinata" a gruff voice, imitating Naruto's whispered behind her in her ear.

Hinata jumped up in surprise, her face red as she squeaked out "K-Kiba-kun!" partly in surprise and in exasperation.

Kiba's toothy grin and boisterous laugh sounded out as he slung his arm around her shoulder. "So so hot Hinata!"

A deep calm voice followed up and a flash shined on Shino's glasses as he deadpanned "Hinata…Take off your clothes…" A rare mischievous grin graced Shino's features.

"Shino-kun! Not you too!" Hinata exclaimed, absolutely mortified. Her face was so red, she thought she was going to pass out. Her hands covered her flaming cheeks as she pouted at her best friends.

"Bah, haha, ha!" Kiba howled out in laughter at her expense "Good one Shino!"

Hinata groaned, "Stop, I'm so embarrassed!"

"Hinata, he totally has the hots for you! I mean who just says that to a girl?!" Kiba exclaimed, still laughing his ass off.

"Kiba is right. It would be strange to call a girl hot if you're not interested in her." Shino added.

"Naruto didn't mean it like that! He says stuff like that all the time." Hinata muttered in embarrassment, her friends were killing her here.

"Well now I'm really convinced that he likes you!" Kiba continued laughing at Hinata's expense and even Shino chuckled.

Although she was embarrassed, Hinata felt warm and happy. She glanced again in Naruto's direction, more resolved than ever to convey her feelings to him.

Hinata decided to not give him the scarf at the party. She wanted to do this privately, without her friends prying eyes.

That's how they ended up walking together as the snowflakes started to gently fall down from the sky. She bravely asked Naruto if she could walk him home. He looked confused but smiled at her with his beaming grin.

The walk to Naruto's apartment was quiet. Hinata kept her face downwards, sometimes sneaking a glance at Naruto's face and clutching tightly onto the bag in her hands.

Naruto had his hands behind his head, leisurely walking and glancing up at the sky, watching the snowflakes flutter down.

Before they realized, they were in front of Naruto's apartment, standing underneath the street light. The neighborhood was silent, a sense of peace floating in the air.

"So, you said you wanted to tell me something? Do you wanna come up to my apartment?" Naruto asked kindly as Hinata stopped under the lamppost.

Hinata's body trembled with nerves, her hands shaking as she clutched onto the bag like a lifeline.

"N-Naruto-kun… I… I-I wanted to give you this" Hinata stuck out her hands, bending her head down with her eyes closed, as she shoved the present bag into Naruto's hands.

"Whoa! For me! That's so nice, Hinata!" Naruto exclaimed in surprise, he flashed her a grin, his heart felt warm.

Hinata raised her head and watched as he opened up the package.

His ocean eyes lit up in wonder at the scarf, in his hands. "Wow…" He rubbed the material against his cheeks, "It's so soft.." his nose caught the scent of lavender and chamomile.

Naruto looked at her in wonder, emotion caught in his throat, "Wow… is this handmade?"

Hinata nodded shyly, a soft blush coating her cheeks. "Y-yes."

"Hinata… Thank you. No one's ever made me anything." Naruto confessed sheepishly as he looked down at the red scarf in his hands.

He paused for a moment, looking guilty, "I'm sorry, I didn't get you anything…"

Hinata waved his worries away "Don't worry, I don't need anything…"

Then he looked back at Hinata and beamed brightly, "I really love it! Thanks a lot -dattebayo!"

Hinata felt her heart flutter. Naruto liked, no, loved her gift. A surge of warmth spread through her chest and into her cheeks as she smiled at him. Confidence ran through her. She could do this. She could confess.

"Naruto-kun… For so many winters…, I've always watched you… I always wanted to catch up to you. I always wanted to walk by your side…Your smile saved me, you changed me…" Hinata poured out her feelings, telling Naruto how much he affected her.

Her lavender eyes stared deeply into his blue eyes as she continued, "For so long… I…I- I love you, Naruto-kun."

Confusion flashed in eyes for a moment, before he smiled brightly at her. "I love you too, Hinata! You've always been a precious friend and comrade to me. You're a great friend!"

Her heart caught in her throat. He didn't understand… Doubt plagued her for a moment, before she shook her head, eyes determined.

She took his large hands in her smaller hands, the red scarf covering them. Hinata stared up at him, catching his eyes with hers. "No… Naruto-kun."

She hesitated for a moment, "I-I don't want to be your friend…"

His breath hitched in pain and his eyes opened wide… "Hinata…"

"I love you, Naruto-kun. I've loved you for so many winters, I can't count…" Hinata continued as his expression changed into confusion, his brows drawing downwards.

"I love you more than a friend or precious comrade… What I feel for you is different from what I feel for Kiba-kun, Shino-kun, and all of our friends… I want to be with you, Naruto-kun! That's why I knitted this scarf to convey my love for you!" Hinata confessed sincerely, hoping her feelings would reach Naruto's heart.

Confusion washed away from Naruto's face. He swallowed deeply, his mouth feeling heavy. "Hinata…I…" a small blush graced his cheeks.

"Umm, you're the first person to tell me that you love me…" Naruto said somewhat in awe. The heaviness didn't leave his voice though. His chest felt heavy like a ton of bricks.

Hinata was looking at him with so much emotion, so much sincerity. He could tell that she meant every word that she said that why it hurt… "Hinata I'm so sorry…but i can't accept this gift…" his voice was gravely.

Her hopeful face crashed, the second the apology left his lips. Her hands fell numbly to her sides. Most of the scarf fell to the ground, only a small piece clutching between her fingers.

"I'm really sorry Hinata… I-I don't want to hurt you but i don't feel the same way… i'm so sorry"

Each word was a knife to the heart. She couldn't bear to look at his eyes filled with pity and guilt.

Her chest felt like it was concaving in. Her breathing was uneven. Her body trembled.

"But hey, don't worry… You're great, you're really strong and pretty and smart and kind… and some guy would totally love you the way you deserve… Just not-..." Naruto continued trying to ease the blow.

Her heart clenched painfully, it felt like Naruto was physically crushing her heart to dust. She bit down harshly on her lower lip as her jaw trembled. Tears pooled in her eyes and she desperately tried to blink them back. She couldn't cry in front of him. She couldn't…

"Um, we can still be friends right?" Naruto asked quietly, worried about her lack of response. "You will always be a precious friend to me, Hinata…" He pleaded with her, afraid to lose her friendship.

Hinata nodded once, slowly, her face still trembling. She couldn't stay here and listen to him anymore… It hurt too much. A chakra rod to the chest, paled in comparison to the pain she was experiencing at this moment…

"Goodbye, Naruto-kun…" she whispered quietly as the first tear slid down her cheek, betraying her…

She turned quickly, running away, dragging the scarf against the cold ground. She didn't stop when he called her. She ran and she ran until her feet brought her to the park and she sat on a lonesome swing.

The tears flowed down her cheeks without restraint. She clutched at her chest, willing her heart to calm down but it didn't work. Sobs flew out of her lips, louder and louder, the more she tried to quell them. She could only press the cold scarf against her face, crying her heart out.

The harsh winds smacked against her body, as the snow started to fall violently. The sky was crying with her but she didn't even notice.

Hinata didn't know how many hours she sat there crying in the snowstorm. All she knew was that she cried until her sobs turned to pitiful whimpers, her hands turned to ice, and her entire being felt numb…