*Author's Note*
Thanks for reading, faving, following, and reviewing.
I apologize for taking so long to update this. Real Life got in the way.
Shattered Dreams
Tolbert POV:
After breakfast I took Sally Elle over to Logan so t'visit with Moses. Poor kid was gonna be in a mental eval soon; felt crazy. I understood that feelin'. Feelin' crazy; like somethin' ain't right wit'cha. I told Ella I was gonna talk t'her brother 'bout bein' bipolar and I meant it. Maybe if he heard from me how things are, well maybe it'd help him some.
"Poppy, are we 'lone 'gain?" Sally Elle randomly asked ov'r the sound of the radio.
"What?" I asked, jerkin' my head up to look at my girl thru the rearview mirror.
"Mama left. We're 'lone 'gain, right?"
"Sally Elle, sweetheart…" I heavily sighed. I didn't know what to tell her. She was so young an' ev'thing wit' me an' Ella was so fucked up. I fucked things up years 'go; just made things snowball an' keep gettin' fucked up now. I couldn't tell that t'my daughter tho. She's too young t'understand. "We're not 'lone. Mama just can't be wit' us cause her work; but she will when it's ov'r." I half-lied, hopin' to cheer up Sally Elle.
"Oh…" She nodded 'fore lookin' out her window. But she wasn't quiet for long. "That why we seein' Mo? She workin' when he sick; leave 'im 'lone too?"
"She saw him last night." I told her 'fore 'xplainin', "I gotta talk t'him cause I think I can help 'im get better. Seein' ya might cheer 'im up too."
"Oh…okay." My daughter nodded as we got closer to the hospital in Logan.
God, how I hated Logan 'n' the people in it. All 'em West Virginian's were destroyin' my life; my happiness. Mo needed t'leave his Hatfield girlfriend unless he wants to truly succeed in comittin' suicide the next time. Oh, an' wit' how bad he's feelin' 'bout my brother's accidental death there'll be a next time.
"We're here, Sally Elle." I announced while pullin' into the hospital parkin' lot. She didn't say a word, just nodded as I looked for a parkin' spot. "After this we'll go see Perry Cline, let 'im know how Moses is doin'. 'Kay?" I suggested, pullin' into an open spot an' cuttin' my truck's engine.
"Okay, poppy." Sally Elle nodded, sadness in her blue eyes from losin' her 'mama' once 'gain.
Goddamnit, I hated this trial. Perry shouldn't 've gotten Ella involved. If she was back East, well she wouldn't be married t'some Hatfield in an attempt t'get me freed. She also wouldn't be pregnant wit' my child either, reckon that's the only good thing t'come outta Lawyer Cline's meddlin'.
Quietly, I got outta the truck an' then got Sally Elle outta the back seat. Carryin' her slung ov'r my hip, I made my way ov'r to the hospital buildin'. The front doors slid open, causin' me t'walk on inside. I didn't know what room Moses was in (Ella left 'fore tellin'), so I went up to the candy striper desk t'find out. "'Xcuse me, Miss?" I cleared my throat, causin' some lady t'look up from the mag'zine she was flippin' thru.
"Can I help you?" She asked.
"I'm lookin' for Moses Quincey's room." I told the girl behind the front desk, causin' her to just sigh an' put down her mag'zine.
She typed on her computer screen an' clicked on a couple things 'fore tellin' me, "He's in the ICU. 8th floor, room 810."
"Thank ya." I nodded 'fore takin' off to the el'vators. Sally Elle leaned her head 'gainst my shoulder as I walked up to the el'vators an' hit the call button for it. After a couple minutes, the doors dung open an' I walked inside. "Mo's on the 8th floor. Wanna hit the button?" I asked Sally Elle, causin' her to just nod and press the button wit' her tiny hand.
Once the 8 button was pressed the doors dinged shut an' the el'vator started movin'. "We here?" Sally Elle asked once the el'vator stopped.
"Yea, sweetheart, we're here." I told her right as the doors dung open.
We walked down the hall til we reached the room marked 810. I lightly rapped my knuckles on the door 'fore openin' it an' walkin' inside the room.
"Hey, Tolbert, guess ya heard I downed a full bottle of Vicodin; tried to take myself out." Mo tried to joke as I made my way ov'r to the visitin' chair by his bedside.
"Yea, yer sister told me last nite." I told him wit' an unamused look on my face.
"She tell ya I'm gettin' a 48-hour psych eval soon; gettin' happy pills shoved down my throat?" He scoffed as I took a seat next t'him in the chair.
I was settlin' Sally Elle down t'sit on my lap while I told the once happy go lucky guy in the bed, "Moses, I'm here to talk t'ya 'bout my own mental health issues. I'm hopin' it'll make ya feel better, 'specially wit' how Ella's so worried 'bout ya on top of dealin' wit' a bad marriage."
"You got mental health issues? Oh, I would've never known." He sarcastically snipped, turnin' his head to the side so he wouldn't have t'look at me.
"I'm a bipolar depressive."
"Oh…" Mo trailed off. "That explains a lot."
"Yea, Ella said the same thing when she found out."
"Ya'll together?" He perked up. "I told her to leave Cap, focus on you and gettin' ya the hell out of these hills."
"We were, but she had to leave cause of lawyer-client ethics issues."
"Let me guess, her husband flipped his shit and threated to out her to the ethics board." Moses told me instead of askin'. 'Course he figured it out.
"Yep." I popped my tongue as my daughter just looked 'round the room, talkin' in the sterilized feelin' of ev'rythin'.
"Go figures. Too bad she couldn't get you a sweet deal before that marriage fell apart."
"For bein' depressed ya sure are talkin' a lot."
"Eh." He shrugged, makin' his hospital gown crinkle. Lookin' 'tween his slipper sock covered feet an' me, he admitted, "Talkin' keeps my mind from thinkin'."
"Cause when ya think yer blamin' yerself for Billy's accident; his death." I concluded, feeling just awful for the guilt he was carryin' 'bout my brother's accidental death.
"Yea…" Moses nodded, his eyes blinkin' back formin' tears. "He was my best friend since I was a baby. I didn't mean t'kill him. He was like my brother, but now Uncle Perry and your dad wants me to be tried for vehicular homicide. Worse is that Devil Anse wants me to marry Betty so that I can beat a trial cause wives can't testify against their husbands, and they think since Betty was in the car in front of mine that she'd be called as a witness and badgered if we're not married."
Married to a Hatfield?! Oh hell no! Ella went an' gone done that (most likely to try an' get me a deal or the case thrown out) an' that went up in a pile o'flamin' horse shit. Mo don't need'a make that mistake.
Raisin' my brow, I curiously pried, "Ya don't wanna marry Betty Hatfield, do ya?"
"Honestly? No, I don't. And don't get me wrong, I really like my girlfriend, but I don't wanna marry her. Hell, I haven't even been with her that long."
"Killin' yerself t'avoid yer grief, guilt, an' pressure of marriage ain't the way to go 'bout it, Moses. Ya got a sister that loves you an' I think Perry Cline loves ya too in his own way. They'd be crushed if ya succeed next time."
"There ain't gonna be a next time, Tolbert."
"Ain't there? Cause way I see it, ya keep up doin' what yer doin' an' there will be a next time. A next time were ya succeed cause ya can't handle the pressures of yer life."
"Since you got bipolar depression did you ever try to…you know…do what I did?"
"No, but I sure did think 'bout it. More than I care t'admit." I honestly told the young man layin' in the hospital bed. "After breakin' up wit' yer sister so that she'd be able to study law an' fulfill her dreams, I had days where I didn't feel like livin'. Days where I barely felt alive."
"What changed? When'd ya feel better?" He asked, but I figured he would.
"Sally Elle, 'ere, was born an' I became a poppy. That's what changed." I answered while lookin' at my daughter wit' a pround smile on my face. Sure, I made a lotta mistakes in my life, but Sally Elle wasn't one. Bein' her poppy's the best thing I've ever done in my life.
"Oh…"
"I dunno if Ella's told ya, but Mary Eldridge is sayin' she's pregnant with Billy's baby. I dunno if she's lyin' or not cause of what was goin' on wit' Billy an' Mariah, but if she's tellin' the truth then ya ain't the only one that lost my brother. Her an' their baby lost him too. Maybe when ya get outta 'ere ya should go home to yer uncle's an' then look up Mary. Ya both lost him, maybe ya'll can help eachother grieve 'im."
"Yea, I think I'll do that." Moses nodded, a sad line tuggin' at the corners of his lips.
"Look, I can talk to my poppy if ya want. Try an' reason wit' him." I offered cause I didn't want him endin' up in jail or married to a Hatfield cause my poppy did somethin' rash out o'grief.
"He won't budge, but maybe you'd have better luck talkin' with my Uncle Perry."
"I'll talk to him." I promised the boy that should've been my brother-in-law if things were different.
Nova POV:
"Uncle Perry, you home?" I called out as I set foot inside of my childhood home, droppin' my duffle and shutting the door behind me.
"I'm in my study, Novella." My uncle's voice echoed out into the still air. Quickly, I made my way to where he was at. He must've heard my footsteps on the hardwood floor because as soon as I stepped inside of his study, he lifted his book he was nose deep in and asked, "Finally decided to come home?"
"Yes." I nodded, feeling melancholy as I shuffled over to an open chair by my uncle. "I went to Tolbert's first, but Cap came by and threatened to go to the ethics board and get me disbarred." I confessed while sittin' down.
With a smirk, my uncle asked, "So, you really did pick Tolbert in the end?"
"Reckon so." I nodded.
"Does your husband know you're here or is he expecting you to go back to his home?"
"He knows I'm not going back to the house. He says he'll find me a rental."
"You don't need a rental; you can stay here."
"Thank you." I gratefully told him. After everything that happened, well, I wouldn't blame him for turnin' me away. Thank God, he still wanted me around. I don't know what I'd do without him considerin' what my brother just did.
Uncle Perry's gave me a level look with his snake-like eyes. "Novella, I'm goin' to be frank with you, my dear. You need to get an annulment, since you haven't been married that long, change your name back to Landon, and you need to get a DNA test done to protect your child from unnecessary custody visitations."
"The baby's prolly Cap's."
"Is there a chance that it's Tolbert's?" He asked with a knowing look on his fox-like face.
"Yes." I nodded. "We were together on my birthday, then we fought, and things ended as quickly as they began."
"Well, then there's a chance the baby could be Tolbert's and, in order to protect you, Tolbert, and the baby, a DNA test must be done."
"You're gonna schedule it whether I want to do it or not, ain't ya?"
"Yes." I knew he was gonna say that. "It can be done by a blood test and all we need is both you and Tolbert at the clinic for the procedure."
I didn't want to get the test done, but I knew that I wouldn't be able to talk my uncle out of making the appointment. Plus, as a lawyer, I knew what he was saying was right. I needed proof, one way or the other, about Cap's relation to my baby for the annulment papers and such. Hell, we both knew the marriage was over. "Okay, set up the annulment papers and schedule the blood test." I relented with a sigh.
"Oh, you know if I call the clinic that I have my clients use, I'm sure they can squeeze you and Tolbert in today."
"Do it. I can't live like this anymore. I need to focus on my client's case and not have any doubts 'bout my baby's paternity. I also have to just write my marriage off as a loss as well."
"After the test we'll go to your ex-husband's house and pack the rest of your things. Don't want him holding onto false hope that the marriage is salvageable." My uncle told me, causing me to numbly nod. I pray that Cap's at his office today and not at home cause I don't want to deal with him while packing up my stuff.
Tolbert POV:
I had just crossed the Tug Bridge when my phone started goin' off. I grabbed my phone an' saw Perry's name flashin' 'cross the screen. Good, I need to talk t'him anyhow. "'Ello, Perry. I was just on my way t'see ya. Wanna talk t'ya 'bout Moses."
"Oh, so Novella told you about what he did." He said knowingly. Bet he was noddin' his head too.
"Yes. I was just visitin' him."
"Tolbert, what in the blazing hell fires?! You crossed state lines, while out on bond, to visit my suicidal nephew in the hospital?!"
"Yea. I told Ella I'd talk to him."
"Because you're an expert in mental health?" Perry asked sarcastically. "Well, Tolbert, don't do it again. I don't need my future ex-nephew-in-law sticking you behind bars for jumping bond."
"Ella hasn't gone back home to him?" Well, that both shocked me an' gave me hope. If she weren't back wit' him then I really did stand a chance of bein' wit' her if I beat my murder charges.
"No, in fact she's back with me. We'll be going to Cap Hatfield's place to collect her things after the appointment at the lab for a paternity test. Which is the reason for the call, I need you to meet us at the LabCorp building here in Pikeville at noon. It's across the street from the Miner's Union Hall."
"Ella's agreed to this?" I asked, stunned since she was dead set 'gainst it all 'em times I brought it up.
"Yes. We need to prove that you're the rightful father so that Cap Hatfield can't claim any rights to the baby. I'll be drawing up and submitting annulment papers for my niece and I want my great-nephew protected and far away from the people his mother entangled herself with in an attempt to soften the cold dead heart of the devil's ADA son in exchange for your freedom."
"Is an annulment same as a divorce?"
"Essentially, but not as complex. It dissolves marriages that are coerced or not entirely legal."
"Ah." I nodded. Flippin' on my signal, I got ready to turn down Perry's street. "Perry, I'm 'bout to turn down yer street. I need to discuss somethin' wit'cha. Is it okay if I see Ella or will that get her in trouble?"
"And how do you even know I'm home and not at my office?"
"Mo's in the hospital, you're not workin' wit' what he did fresh in yer mind."
"You won't get in trouble bein' around Novella under my roof." The lawyer assured me, only t'add in, "I think she'd like to see you."
"I'm pullin' up now. Don't tell Ella I'm here, I got Sally Elle wit' me an' I'd like her to be surprised."
"I won't tell her. Just come in, I'm in my office and you knocking would just ruin the surprise."
I said goodbye to Perry, hung up my phone, and cut my truck's engine. Lookin' at my daughter thru the rearview, I asked, "Ya ready t'see mama?"
"Yea. I wanna see mama."
"Okay, lemme get'cha outta the back an' we'll go right inside." I told my excited lil girl as I swung my door open an' got outta the truck.
"Hurry up, poppy. I wanna see mama." Sally Ella whinned, kickin' her legs into the air, as I stuffed my phone in my back pocket and shut my door.
"I'm hurryin', I'm hurryin', sweetheart." I assured my daughter, openin' the back door t'my truck an' quickly unbucklin' her from her car seat. "We'll see mama in a minute. Just hold yer horses." I told Sally Elle as I picked her up and hiked her over my hip.
"But I ain't got no horses, poppy." Sally Elle told me as I slammed the truck door shut.
"It's an expression, sweetheart. Just means t'calm down." I explained to my girl as I started the trek up the driveway.
"Oh…"
I didn't know how t'feel as I passed by Ella's truck in the driveway. On one hand I wanted to see her, but on the other I was nervous. What happened this mornin' was still fresh in my mind. And that talk I had wit' her brother, yea…well…that was still fresh in my mind too.
After steppin' up on the front porch, I put Sally Elle down. "Why don't ya go on in; see hi to mama?" I suggested to my daughter 'fore openin' the door.
Sally Elle didn't say a word to me, just ran into the house. "Mama! Mama, I'm here to see ya!" Sally Elle shouted; running down the entryway an' into the living room as I walked inside.
"Oh my god! Sally Elle, you're here!" I heard Ella exclaim in a s'prised tone as I shut the door behind me an' headed towards the room she was at wit' our girl. "Where's your poppy at, sweetie?" She asked the lil girl she was holdin' as I entered the room.
"I'm right 'ere, Ella." I revealed myself, causin' her head to snap up.
Tears welled up in Ella's cornflower blues as she let out a shaky breath of, "Tolbert." She let go of Sally Elle, only to run up t'me. Without a word, she wrapped her arms 'round my waist an' buried her head into my chest. 'Fore I could get a word out, the dam broke an' she was wracked wit' sobs. "I'm so sorry, Tolbert. I've done stuff I should've have and messed up everything." My Ella hiccupped into my shirt, that she was soakin' wit' her tears.
"No." I shook my head. "No, darlin', I'm the one who messed up. I walked 'way when I shouldn't 've. I also should've just told ya the truth 'bout it when ya asked on yer birthday, then maybe things wouldn't be so messed up."
"You two were always lovesick fools that were always awful at communication." Perry's voice sounded out from behind us. "Sally Elle, let's go find a snack in the kitchen and give your parents some time to talk." Perry suggested to my daughter as he walked past us and over to her.
"Ok." Sally Elle simply told Perry before letting her 'Uncle' take her into the nearby kitchen.
"Do you think Uncle Perry's right 'bout us?" Ella sniffled, lookin' up at me with red, puffy eyes.
"Yea, think maybe he is." I answered. "I've loved ya for a long time; ain't nothin' gonna change that, Ella."
"I love you too. I think I was just runnin' and hidin' from it cause of all of the heartbreak and shattered dreams I had caused by you abruptly endin' us."
"What'ca mean by shattered dreams, darlin'? You were able to fullfil yer dream, ya became a lawyer."
Tears formed in her eyes 'gain as she revealed in a shaky, broken tone, "I had one dream I wanted more than becoming a lawyer. I wanted to be your wife, to marry my sweetheart and become Mrs. Tolbert John McCoy, but that dream never came true. Instead, I became Mrs. Cap Hatfield cause I couldn't trust you to not break my heart again even tho you swore to me you wouldn't."
Hearing her tell me that broke me. As I held her body against mine as another cryin' fit took ov'r her, I too cried. I cried for the time we lost an' for all the pain an' hurt I caused her. I only wanted the best for her cause I loved her; didn't want her givin' up her dreams for me. Thing is, I never thought that her biggest dream an' desire was bein' wit' me. I truly did fuck up her life. And now here we are, client an' lawyer havin' to get a paternity test for our baby so she can get her Hatfield marriage annulled. Even when her annulment went thru we still wouldn't be able to be together cause of my case. And God forbid if I get sent to jail. Hell, seems like the devil's dead set on keepin' us apart now that we've found each other 'gain.
AN:
Oh boy, things sure are getting complicated for Nova/Ella now, huh? Oh boy, she's going to let Uncle Perry Cline help her file for divorce and get a paternity test with Tolbert. Yikes! So…any guesses on how Cap's going to react to all of this? I know, I know, the ending got a bit heavy. I wasn't planning on the last scene to go down like that, but it's what the muses demanded.