For those who haven't seen the Expendables, I am following canon of the 3rd movie, which is why I'm not getting into full details of it and am doing more of a summary of it with my own added events.

Happy reading!

"That was really stupid," Toll said, looking back and forth between Doc, Lee, and Gunner.

"What was? You trying to be taller than you were or Barney leaving us behind and putting his life in the hands of amateurs?" Doc asked, lifting a brow.

"The latter," Toll replied.

"Well, he's gone now," Gunner said heavily. "Nothing we can do about it."

Lee sat quietly. They had just come from Barney's hangar where he was loading up and getting to leave with a bunch of new, younger team members who had smart mouths and were packed with cocky attitudes (they were referred to as "kids" among the rest of them). He had a bad feeling he wasn't going to see Barney again, but he tried to shake it off. He looked around the bar and did his best to think about something else.

"Where's Maya?" Toll asked him after a moment.

"Tia's got her today," Lee answered. "They're doing girly stuff."

"Louis too?"

"He's at soccer for a few hours."

"Ah."

"So, how did Miss Maya come to be a part of our group?" Doc asked. He switched his toothpick to the other side, and Lee glanced at him. He still didn't quite know how to take Doc, but so far he wasn't too threatening. The guy had spent a long time locked away, and Lee could tell he was still adjusting to the freedom.

"We were at Barney's family cottage," Toll explained when Lee said nothing. "She was next door with her mom."

"And where is her mom?"

"She's dead," Lee answered flatly, not wanting to give away how much it still hurt him. A flicker of compassion went through Doc's eyes at this.

"Sorry to hear that, man," he said. He looked around at them all again when no one added to it. "So, you just adopted her?"

"Yea," Gunner replied, nodding. "It's what Emily would have wanted."

"Noble of you," Doc advised. "Especially when you didn't have to."

"She's my daughter," Lee snapped, standing up now. He dropped his knuckles on the table hard, rattling the cups there. "Alright? I adopted her, and she's a part of this family now. If you have a problem with that, there's the door."

"Whoa, man," Doc said, holding his hands up. "I don't have a problem with it. I'm just admiring that you did it. I don't think I could do it."

"If you loved Emily the way I do," Lee said, "you would. If you spent time with Maya and got to know her, you would."

"Okay," Doc said softly. "Point taken."

"Lee," Toll said, trying to calm him down. "It's alright."

Lee didn't want anyone to comment on the "noble" thing he'd done. Maya was more than just a sympathy case. She was everything to him, just like her mother had been. He didn't do this out of obligation. He did it because he loved that kid with all his heart.

"I'll see you later," he said, done with sitting here and feeling afraid for his best friend and angry because Doc didn't understand why he'd adopted Maya.

"Lee," Toll tried, but he left without looking back. He drove home where he tried to watch TV but ended up throwing his knife into the screen from his emotions. Then he cursed himself and went out to get another one because Maya would ask questions, and he didn't want her to know he'd lost his temper. She knew he and the boys were some kind of soldiers and went away for work, but they'd left it at that.

"Dad!" Maya exclaimed when he picked her up from Tia's. She threw herself into his waist, hugging him tightly. He put an arm around her in return, using the other to steady himself on the railing from her impact.

"How was it?" he asked, ruffling her hair. She looked up at him, her eyes giving him that look of annoyance because he was messing up her 'do. He smiled, and then she batted his hand away and bounced out of his grip.

"It was so much fun," Maya said. "Aunt Tia did my nails!"

"Wow," Lee said, noticing the bright pink on her fingernails now. "Very nice."

"I think Louis felt left out when we dropped him off at soccer," Maya went on. "But I liked the girl time." She sounded so grown up almost that it made Lee swallow. She was soon going to be eight, but at times, she was so much wiser than her age.

"Alright, lady," Tia said, coming out with Maya's backpack. "I gotta run and get Louis, but today was fun. Thank you."

"Thank you," Maya said back, smiling at her and going to give her a hug.

"Thanks," Lee added, and Tia bobbed her head back at him.

"No problem. A girl needs her girl time, right?" She looked at Maya, who nodded emphatically.

"I'm sure it was a good distraction for you too," Lee advised.

"Yea," Tia agreed. "For a little bit anyway."

"It'll be alright," Lee told her softly as she looked sad again. "I know it."

"I really hope so."

"Uncle Hale would have wanted us to have a bit of fun," Maya said solemnly. "Right?"

"Absolutely," Tia agreed, giving her a small smile. Lee gave her a hug, said his goodbye, and then took Maya's hand before they began to leave. He knew Tia walked around holding her breath most of the time or had a cry fest, and he ached inside as well at the thought they might lose Caesar. He envied that Maya could put it on pause for a while, but he knew she also spent time worrying and crying when she thought he didn't notice. It hurt to hear, and sometimes he left her alone because he wasn't sure if she wanted comfort or to just let it out. If she was in a good place right now, why not keep her in it?

"Can we get pizza?" Maya asked as they walked towards Lee's truck.

"Hmm, I dunno," Lee said, opening the door for her. "Can we?"

"Daaaaad," she groaned, giving him a look as he smirked and boosted her up. She rolled her eyes and put her seatbelt on as he got into the driver's side.

"May we get pizza?" she tried again, looking at him sideways.

"Yes," he answered, "we may." She was still giving him a look as he reached to ruffle her hair again.

"Dad!"

He started the truck as he laughed. He never got tired of hearing her call him Dad. He only had her in his life for a year, but he really did feel like her father.

...

Barney knew that Tool had put Trench up to tagging along with him for the sake of having someone watch his ass and bring him home in one piece. He hadn't complained, though. It was nice to work with the big guy again, but he'd never admit that out loud.

And Trench wasn't attending the mission either. He was just the back up.

Barney missed his team; these youngsters had different ideas that he wasn't used to. He liked old school better. Wrapping his head around technology and modern day thinking just wasn't something he wanted (or liked) to do. He had to resist pouting when his plan of bursting in guns blazing to extract Conrad got shot down with a double barrel shot gun blast. He decided to let the kids have their fun. After all, they were just expendable to him.

So long as he got Conrad and dealt with him once and for all, that was all that mattered.

...

It was the middle of the night when the first crack of thunder occurred. Lee opened his eyes, knowing what was coming. After about ten minutes, he heard the padding of her feet down the hall to his room. A moment later, she was reaching to shake him by the arm.

"Dad?" she said.

"Come on," he answered, reaching for her and lifting her up into bed with him. She got comfortable and then curled on her side against his back, burying her face in between his shoulders to hide from the lightning. It almost reminded Lee of the dog he had years ago that liked to sleep against his back for warmth. After a while, he had to move, so he settled on his back while Maya stuck her head under his arm and hid her face against his side. He rested his hand on her back, moving it in comforting circles as she whimpered in fear with each flash of lightning.

"It's alright," he said to her. "It can't hurt you in here." He was reminded of being under the canoe with Emily and riding out a storm on the lake, how her hand had felt wrapped around his.

"Why is it so bright?" she asked, her voice muffled by his shirt.

"That's one of those things I don't know," he answered honestly.

"I'll add it to the list," she replied, and he gave a scoff of laughter. She'd created it as a joke after he kept telling her he didn't know about things when she asked. It was becoming a lengthy list, but Lee preferred to be honest about what he did and didn't know rather than lie about stuff. He hoped she didn't have an expectation of him to find the answers to all of them. He'd be busy until he died.

"Tell me something interesting," he said now, trying to get her mind off of the storm.

"I dreamt of Mum last night," Maya replied. "She told me everything was gonna be okay."

This took Lee off guard slightly. He knew Maya missed her mother, and in the last little while, she'd had more emotional outbursts about it than she had in the past. He knew it was almost the anniversary of her death, so he figured that had something to do with it.

"Sounds like a nice dream," Lee said now, clearing his throat.

"It was." There was a pause, then: "She's really dead, isn't she?"

Lee swallowed hard, feeling the grief come out of nowhere. Had Maya been holding onto hope for all this time that her mother was alive somehow? It hurt him a lot.

"Yes, Maya. She's really gone."

He felt her shudder under his hand and knew she was having a little cry. She didn't say anything, and he didn't know what else to say, so he said nothing and just comforted her nonverbally. Then:

"Dad?"

"Yea?"

"Please don't leave again."

And there it was. His heart ached at her voice, and he cleared his throat.

"I might have to."

"Please don't. I don't wanna be alone." Her voice was small and teary. He knew she meant if something happened to him.

"You won't be alone," he promised, not exactly saying he wasn't going to go help Barney if he had to. She kept quiet, and he felt bad for not being able to promise her he wasn't going anywhere. He felt so torn. How could he leave Barney to possibly die if things went wrong? After all they'd been through? But how could he leave Maya a true orphan if he went and didn't survive? After a moment, he turned his head and saw Emily lying on her left side looking at him as her head rested on her hand.

"She's right," she told him. "Everything's gonna be alright."

Lee wanted to answer, but he didn't want to freak Maya out by talking to her mother's ghost, so he left it. He felt the ache inside at how badly he wanted Emily to be real next to him. He wanted her there to complete this family, to help soothe her daughter's fears of the storm.

"I love you," Emily whispered, and he felt his throat tighten with emotion as he looked at her, wanting to say it back.

When Maya gave a yelp at lightning, he looked at her out of instinct to make sure she was okay. When he was reassured, he looked to see Emily was gone.

Somehow, that made his heart break all over again.

...

Caesar was tired of this forest. He'd walked around it enough times to memorize where everything was. The only thing that changed was her.

She came and went like a butterfly fluttering over a field of flowers.

"Please tell me how I know you," Caesar said when he saw her again. "I know I know you."

She said nothing yet again, making him even more annoyed.

"I know I'm stuck here," Caesar went on. "And I know you're stuck here with me, so whatever is going on, we're in this together. Just tell me who you are so I can get back to stressing about how the hell to get out of here."

She smiled wide, taking steps backwards.

"No, no," Caesar said as she slunk back in through the trees. "No, don't do that! Don't leave again!"

She was gone, and no matter how hard he looked, he couldn't find her.

"Damn it!" he shouted, spinning in a slow circle. "HEY!"

She didn't answer or show herself. He was alone, yet again.

Two Days Later

Lee sat across from Tool with Doc, Gunner, and Toll on either side of him. They were all waiting for Tool to speak again after telling them what happened, but Lee wasn't sure if he'd even hear it. All he could focus on was the fact that Barney had almost died and had lost his team to Conrad Stonebanks, who was now holding them hostage after freeing himself from being extracted by Barney. It made him angry all over again that his friend had forced them to stay behind.

"So what is he gonna do now?" Toll asked.

"I don't know. Trench just said, 'reload,'" Tool replied. He looked distressed, but no one dared comment on it. They knew how furious he was with Barney right now. Lee was surprised he was even involved. He figured Tool would have cut himself off from it all to spare the pain, but that showed how much he couldn't stop caring about his fellow brothers.

"He really dug a deep hole this time, didn't he?" Doc sighed. Gunner had his fingers gripping his hair as he looked back and forth between them all.

"We gotta bail him out, right?" Toll looked around at all of them. Lee's jaw twitched. He had Maya to think about and could hear her asking him to not leave, but he knew he couldn't let Barney try and save his team by himself.

"You better," Tool advised, pointing a finger at each of them. "You should have fought harder to go with him the first time."

"Hey, we tried," Lee said, affronted. "He's the one who fired us."

"You have to know he did it because he's scared," Tool said. "He has lost a lot of people in his life, and he suddenly decided he couldn't lose any of you, so he cut you loose. I get it, but he shouldn't have done it."

"Yea," Gunner agreed. "We knew what we signed up for."

"Barns is leaving soon?" Lee asked, and Tool nodded.

"Yea, but you didn't hear it from me because I'm still not talking to him. You better hurry."

Lee got to his feet, releasing a heavy sigh. He feared Maya would be angry at him for leaving her so soon after her asking him not to, but he justified it with the reasoning that if she was in his place and it was Louis, she'd do it too. Maybe it was wrong, but he couldn't just give up on Barney. He couldn't have another loss. He got into his truck and went to Tia's where Maya was hanging out again. He braced himself for her reaction.

...

Tia was cooking lunch when Lee came inside. She could tell right away that he had news for Maya that she wasn't going to like. She'd heard second hand what had happened and knew those men were not just gonna stand by and do nothing.

"You're going, aren't you?" she asked. He sighed.

"Yea."

"What's the plan?"

He gave her a quick rundown, and Tia felt sick. This whole thing sounded like a suicide mission, and she feared what would happen if they all died.

"You're crazy," she said.

"I know."

"Dad!" Maya called, spying him now and running over to him. "What are we gonna do today?"

"Maya, I need to talk to you," he said.

"Okay..."

Tia watched them move to a private space, and she counted to twenty before she heard Maya starting to freak out and Lee trying to calm her down. Louis was in the kitchen at the table at this point, and he looked worried.

"Mum, what's Uncle Lee saying?" he asked.

"He has to go away for a bit again," Tia answered truthfully.

"Is he gonna come back?"

"I hope so, baby," Tia said, looking at him now. "I hope so."

...

Lee couldn't get Maya's shrieks out of his head, nor could he stop feeling her fists hitting his chest. It had killed him to walk away and leave her with Tia, who had been hanging onto her hard to stop her from chasing him. He hated that he did that to her, to both of them. He hated that Maya was so afraid for him ever since what happened to Caesar. He hoped she understood why he was doing this, but he didn't think she did. She wanted him to let the others go with Barney to help, not him. He didn't mean to break her heart.

But he couldn't lose Barney. He'd never live with himself if he didn't go with him to watch his back and lost him because of it.

"You okay?" Toll asked, seeing his face.

"Fine," he answered curtly.

"She didn't take it well," Toll said, realizing.

"Not one bit."

"We'll make sure you get home, brother," Gunner said to him. They were standing in a row on the tarmac, waiting for Barney to find them.

"For Maya," Doc added, making Lee look at him. The guy was alright he guessed.

The plane came towards them, and they saw Barney peering at them through the windshield. Lee felt irritated to see that someone was sitting in his seat. The plane stopped, and Barney stuck his head out the window to ask them what the hell they were doing, to which Lee retorted back that he was stupid enough to get into this mess and they were the only ones crazy enough to bail him out of it.

Barney waved his hand to gesture them to come forward, so they did. Lee went in first and made his way to the front, passing the stranger as he did so.

"Christmas," Barney said, reaching to shake his hand heartily.

"Idiot," Lee replied, making his friend scoff.

"Don't remind me."

"Who's the gangly one?" Lee asked, jerking his head over his shoulder to the newcomer, who was now chatting up a storm with Toll, Gunner, and Doc whether they wanted it or not.

"Galgo," Barney answered. "The guy is desperate to shoot something."

"Let's hope he's good," Lee said, settling down into his seat and trying not to think about Maya.

"I'm sure he will be."

"You wanna tell me why you went all kamikaze on us?"

"I just didn't want to lose anyone else," Barney sighed. "I've had enough pain, you know?"

"Yea, I know."

"How's Maya?"

"Scared shitless."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't," Lee stopped him, looking at him now. The plane was rising higher in the air by this point. "I signed up for this. Nobody put a gun to my head."

Barney just nodded, but Lee had a strange feeling that Barney was apologizing for more than just him doing this job. He knew his friend felt badly about failing to save Emily. It was unspoken between them.

"You retiring after?" Barney asked.

"I think that's a good idea," Lee agreed.

"Me too."

They didn't talk much for the rest of the flight, and Lee did his best to remain calm and feel confident that he hadn't lied to Maya.

That he really was going to come back home.

...

It had been a real shit show, and Barney was exhausted. They'd found the kids and went to rescue them, but it wasn't over, though, because he was now squared off from Conrad and fighting for his life with the building ready to collapse around them from the explosives Conrad had placed in it. He could hear Lee shouting his name and asking where the hell he was. He was glad all of them had made it out of there after fighting so hard. If Barney was honest, he was pretty sure this was the end for him.

And he was eerily calm about it.

"Come on," Conrad said, gesturing with his hands. "Come and get it!" He wore a bloodthirsty expression, one Barney had seen before. He'd never thought it would ever be aimed at him, though.

How had he lost his friend? His brother in arms? He hadn't understood it back then, and he didn't understand it now. All he knew was Conrad must be stopped at all costs. Even if that meant losing his life for it.

Barney lunged, and they fought. He took blows and delivered blows. He did it for Caesar. He did it for Billy. He did it for everyone he'd lost and failed. He knew he was running out of time, but as long as his team survived, that was a win.

"This won't be over," Conrad panted, squared off from him during a pause in their battle. "You can kill me, but another will take my place. It'll never stop, Barns."

"Maybe not, but at least I'll know there's one less out there," Barney retorted.

"Is it worth losing man after man after man? You know you will."

"You gonna keep talking or are you gonna start fighting?" Barney didn't want to think about anyone else dying. He knew Conrad was just trying to get into his head. He wouldn't let him. Conrad swiped at his face with the back of his hand before putting his fists up again. Then they were back at it.

In the end, Barney managed to get to his gun faster and filled Conrad's chest full of lead. His former friend went down, a bit of a shocked expression on his face before the life left his eyes and he fell to the ground dead. Barney wished he could have saved his friend, but Conrad had made it very clear that he wasn't the same man he used to be. There was no saving him.

Barney was panting and bleeding, and he was about to start running when he saw something move in his peripheral. He turned his head, seeing someone watching by the exit. He felt his heart constrict slightly as he recognized Fred. He aimed his gun, but Fred was gone in an instant. Barney couldn't go after him, so he ran to the roof where everyone was waiting for him in the chopper . He could only hope that Fred died when the building collapsed.

His team was shouting at him hardcore as he ran towards the rope hanging there. He leaped and managed to catch it as the roof gave way under him. He swung back and forth, feeling his fight or flight starting to slow a bit as he recognized that he was still alive.

"Come on, let me up!" he called. Joking and laughter ensued, and he scoffed and shook his head. So that's what he got for coming out of there in one piece. He looked down to his right and caught sight of a vehicle tearing off amid the chaos, and he just knew it was Fred. So the man had survived.

That was not a good feeling at all.

...

Lee was aching as he boarded Barney's plane. Everyone was talking and laughing about the rescue, but Lee was left feeling incredibly lucky that no one had died. He groaned as he sat down in his seat, and Barney arrived a moment later to sit in his, flicking switches on. Lee reached to do his part, and he looked sideways at Barney, noticing his friend looked pensive about something.

"It was hard, huh?" he asked.

"You know, it was hard the first time," Barney answered, leaning back into his seat once the plane was running. His hand was resting on the throttle. "It was harder the second time."

"What made him turn?"

"I still don't really know. He just got a different idea on how to do things...a more violent, sadistic way, and I didn't agree with it. I don't know where that idea even came from."

"I'm sorry," Lee said, meaning it. He couldn't imagine having to kill Barney for anything. It made him feel slightly nauseous inside.

"Yea. Me too," Barney agreed, sticking a cigar into his mouth and not saying anything else. For a moment, it felt like Barney was keeping something from him, but he was too tired to ask about it right now. Lee faced the front again, trying not to think about Emily. He closed his eyes, thinking about his next steps with Maya. He hated to leave his family behind, but she needed something more than just the guys teaching her stuff or an average school. She needed to be challenged and have her learning fostered and expanded.

"There's a school for the gifted in Seattle," he said after a while. "I've been thinking about it for a bit now. I'm going to take Maya there."

"That's far away," Barney noted.

"I know, but I figured a fresh start would be good."

"You're probably right."

"What are you gonna do?"

"Oh, I'm gonna keep doing what I always do," Barney answered. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

Lee didn't like knowing that his friend could be in trouble again in the future without him there to help out. He knew he couldn't let that stop him, though. He had to do what was best for Maya because her reaction to him leaving had been a big wake up call. He had to realize that whatever happened to Barney was not in his control. He had to understand and accept that he couldn't always be there and that it wasn't his fault if things went wrong. It was time to let go.

It was time to finally put blood work behind him.

...

Tia was at the hospital with Louis and Maya visiting Caesar, relieving Tool for a bit, who traded off shifts with them just to be there in case Caesar woke up. Maya was still struggling with Lee being gone, and Tia wished she could reassure her that everything would be okay. She couldn't really do that with Caesar lying there in the condition he was in, though. They'd all thought he would be okay too. Louis was reading while Maya looked around and swung her feet. After a moment, boots could be heard in the hallway, and all three of their heads snapped towards the sound of it. Maya leaped up and ran for the door just as Lee came through it.

"Dad!" she cried, throwing her arms around his neck as he caught her coming at him. He lifted her up and hugged her tight. Tia could see the fatigue on his face along with relief and other emotions.

"Hey, kiddo," he said, kissing the side of her head. "Told you I'd be back."

"Where's everyone else?" Louis asked, and Lee moved to the side as they all piled in single file: Barney, Toll, Gunner, and Doc.

"Right here," Barney answered, giving the boy a smile. "All in one piece." Maya reached for him now, and he took her from Lee and hugged her tight.

"I'm glad you're okay," she said against his neck, making him look emotional.

"Me too."

Tia appreciated they'd removed their body armor and cleaned themselves up before coming in here.

"How is he?" Toll asked, gesturing to Caesar now.

"The same," she replied. She smiled in appreciation when Toll squeezed her shoulder comfortingly and went to sit next to his friend. She felt lucky to have all these men care about her and her family so much. Amid all the chatter of the men, she saw Lee take Maya out for a private conversation after Barney had set her down. She'd immediately jumped into his arms again, which made Tia recognize the girl's fear of abandonment.

She hoped he had finally decided to do the right thing.

...

Caesar saw her again. She was smiling.

"Time's up," she said to him.

"How do I know you?" he demanded. "Tell me!" She was starting to fade, along with everything else around him. "TELL ME HOW I KNOW YOU!"

"Goodbye, Caesar."

"WAIT!"

He reached out to her, but then it all went blindingly white.

...

"Is Uncle Caesar ever going to wake up?" Maya asked Lee as he carried her down the hall to a quieter room. Upon making sure it was empty, he stepped inside and closed the door, setting Maya down a second later.

"We don't know," he answered honestly.

"I miss him."

"I do too." Her words tugged at his heart. He knew he was making the right choice. How could he ever let the possibility of being in Caesar's state have a chance of happening?

"You're not leaving again, are you?" Maya asked, suspicious and sounding afraid.

"No," he answered. "I'm not. I actually had a better idea."

"What?"

"You and me hitting the road and heading to Seattle," he replied. "There's a really good school there for the gifted you can go to, and we'll be safe."

"Are the uncles, Aunt Tia, and Louis coming too?" Maya asked.

"Well...no," he confirmed. "They'd be staying here."

"I don't want to leave them," she said instantly.

"Maya..."

"No! They're my family! I'm not leaving my family!" she exclaimed, starting to cry. Lee looked at her and felt foolish for not even considering that leaving everyone behind would upset her so much. Because she was right, they were her family. She'd lost enough, and here he was trying to take her away and make her lose even more. And for what? Something he thought was right? How did he know what was best? What was wrong with him. He felt so confused inside. Making choices as a parent was hard.

"Okay," he said.

"I'd rather go to regular school and be with my family than be far away from my family and go to a special school," Maya advised.

"You're right. I guess I just was thinking it was best for you to have as much education as possible."

"I know what's best for me," Maya said firmly. "And that's being with family. I can get educated anywhere."

"You make a very good case, Maya," Lee replied. "I'm sorry for not thinking it through."

"I'm still going to school in the fall, right?" she asked hopefully.

"Yea," he answered, ruffling her hair fondly. She let him this time with no complaints. No one had come after her. No one had bothered them, so he figured it was safe. He knew she needed the socializing piece of it. She couldn't keep hanging around the men forever.

"Yes!" She fist pumped, and he smiled. Then her face faltered. "If we stay, does that mean you'll keep going away for work?"

"No," he confirmed. "I'm gonna find something else to do."

"Okay." She looked happy again, which made him reach to pinch her cheek lightly. Then he heard a voice calling his name. He moved to open the door, going back into the hallway with Maya on his heels. Toll was looking for him.

"What?" he asked, making Toll turn to see him. "What's wrong?"

"It's Caesar," he answered, starting to grin. "He's awake."