Malcolm Walker vs. The Parallel Universe
Chapter 2: "vs. the Date at the Park…"
A pair of boxer shorts landed on the music player, somehow turning it on playing 'Sweet Talker' by Grace Mesa as Malcolm struggled to get ready for the important quest that awaited him later this day. Gathering a red shirt with letters spelling out 'Game on!' and a new pair of jeans, he hopped into the bathroom for a shower.
Afterwards, he brushed his teeth, got dressed, wiped the mirror of steam and snapped his fingers, ending on a finger-bang to the mirror.
"You need to stop doing that." Malcolm Two, the British mirror doppelganger spoke.
"Why? It helps me psych up for the day."
"I'll rephrase. You mustn't let anyone see you do that."
"But-"
"It's embarrassing."
Malcolm rolled his eyes and left the bathroom, coming face to face with the clock on the wall.
"And now we wait." He sat down in front of the clock and didn't stop looking at it for a single second.
At Susie's house…
"Gah!" Arthur jumped from his alcohol induced slumber and groaned.
"Morning sunshine." Susie greeted placing used cups inside a trash bag, tossing one of those same bags to Arthur. "Since you're awake you wouldn't mind helping, right?"
"Yup, mhm… Let me just…" he yawned, closing his eyes and nodding off using the empty trash bag as a make-shift blanket.
Susie sighed and shook her head. After all, it was her own idea to host a party. It wouldn't be fair on her part to not let her guests deal with the consequences of their alcoholic actions.
After some more cleaning up, her phone rang.
It was a text message. Upon reading it, Susie's only reaction was a groan as well as gently hitting her phone on her forehead.
Ashley's apartment…
The girl placed her phone down, wiped the lens of her glasses and put the scrunchy back on her long hair, tying it into a ponytail.
The girl was already fresh out of her shower, sporting a dark magenta dress with a dark denim jacket. In contrast to Malcolm, she was taking her morning with much more ease and less anxiety.
Looking at the time it was barely past 11:30 o'clock.
The girl opened her refrigerator and wondered what she'd be having for lunch if she would ever bother with cooking anything or simply ordering some takeaway with UberEats.
Back to Malcolm…
The 24 year old was planted in front of the clock.
11:33 o'clock.
"GAH!" he jumped up. "Arthur I'm going to go take a walk." As he approached the door he realized his friend was probably still passed out due to an alcohol induced coma or something. Malcolm sighed as he closed the door behind him.
As Malcolm walked through the snowy streets of Quebec, he heard a motorcycle closing in from behind him.
"Oh… UberEats." His stomach growled. "Right. Food. I need that." He then stopped for a moment and reached for his wallet, opening it as a puff of dust was ejected from it.
"Gah!" he stopped, contemplating his lack of funds. "I need a job."
This realization rang deep within Malcolm. In fact, he wondered just for how much more time he could live leeching off of Arthur, knowing fully well that all he has been doing is trusting his dumb childish charm to carry him through his young-adulthood. He wondered for a while on what he could do. Not like there was much he could do for a quick buck to get a least a hotdog or a burger…
… Or was there?!
Malcolm rang the doorbell of a nearby house.
Ding-dong!
He was greeted by an old man in nothing but his boxer shorts and a sleeveless white shirt. "What?"
"For five dollars I'll clean your yard of snow."
"Five dollars?"
"Yes sir."
"Hey Marie! This idiot kid is volunteering to clear our yard for five bucks."
"AH!"
"Here you go, kid. The shovel's in the back. Have fun."
Pocketing the coins Malcolm nodded, disregarding the insult entirely.
Ker-ching! 5$ obtained!
Looking at his Mickey Mouse children's watch Malcolm saw that the date was still a solid two hours away.
And with great motivation he got to work. Surely this would keep him entertained.
Especially when he planned to repeat the process for at least two more houses in the neighborhood.
Malcolm set himself at one corner of the yard and took a deep breath. He proceeded to shovel the snow out of the old man's lawn onto a pile he would deal with later. He proceeded to repeat this process on the next two houses whose owners were more than happy to part with five dollars in exchange for a lazy Saturday morning with no worries.
Sooner rather than later, the fated time for the date with Ashley grew ever closer…
At the park…
It was 14:01.
Malcolm approached the settled spot, close to the two benches with the big tree in between them. Still relatively tired from his recent labor (as well as run back home for another warm shower and fresh set of clothes [luckily he had an identical set of clothes]) he found Ashley already there waiting for him. "She actually came…" his eyes widened as she turned around.
"Oh, you came." She spoke up.
"I mean… Yeah. I'm the one that invited you."
"I've had my share of dates bailing on me."
"Bummer…"
"You get used to it."
"You say that like it's a good thing."
"It's really not." The girl smiled bitterly. "Buuut… We're not here to talk about our pasts are we?"
"I don't know I didn't come prepared with a script. I figured we'd just talk about whatever came up."
Ashley tilted her head. "Winging it. Mad respect."
"Thanks…?" he wondered if his lack of preparation skills somehow had evolved into a positive thing.
They made their way through the park, eventually stopping at a spot with swings and slides. This was the part of the park that also functioned as a miniature playground of sorts for the kids in the area.
"I miss being a child." He spoke as a group of kids passed by them making their way to the slides.
"Really?" she looked at Malcolm.
"Yeah. Having no responsibilities… Not having to work… Summer vacations… all of that."
"I've always kind of told myself that we all just live life in Tutorial Mode until you hit eighteen years old and all of a sudden you have to devote around eight hours of your life per day so you don't starve, all the while asking yourself about what the hell are taxes."
"That's a way to look at it for sure. Do you live by yourself?" he asked.
"Yeah. I'm all alone in this small town. Bar like… Susie and stuff. And you. I guess. Maybe."
"Is that your attempt at sweet talk or something?" Malcolm raised an eyebrow.
After a short snort. "I don't know, Walker. That will depend on the rest of this date goes."
"That's cool, I'm okay with that."
He wasn't. It was actually making him more anxious.
"YOU!" a familiar voice to Malcolm rose up from behind them.
"Okay, now that I'm not okay with." He spoke, alarmed, still not looking back all the while recognising the voice.
This time he was being honest.
When both Malcolm and Ashley turned around, they saw a massive dark aura that was melting the snow around them.
Sarah Blake, Battle Mode
Special Ability: Goth Aura (+2 to Angst)
Weapon: Doomsday Axe (+2 STR vs. Basic Bxtches)
Sarah had found out where they were. While she, for some reason, wasn't angry at Malcolm for leaving her stranded in the middle of the house party, she seemed to target her anger at Ashley, whom she accused of stealing Malcolm's attention away from her.
"Uh… Does she bring that thing with her everywhere or…?" Ashley pointed.
"I uh…"
"You DO know her right?"
"Yeah… I think she… may… have a crush… on me?" Malcolm spaced out his words carefully while trying not to alarm Sarah any further.
"Stand aside Malcolm! I'll take you back from this… This… This poser!" he pointed her double edged axe adorned with a skull in the middle at Ashley.
"Excuse me?!" Ashley looked offended at that.
"Consider yourself excused! By all means feel free to leave!"
"Not happening Female Ozzy Osbourne!" Ashley brought out an aluminum baseball bat. From where? Good question!
Ashley Woods, Battle Mode
Special Ability: Being Literally Done (Nullifies Enemy Stat Boosts)
Weapon: Enchanted Home-runner (Twisting the handle grants random abilities)
"What did you just call me…?"
"Did I stutter?!"
"Uh… Are you guys for real?" Malcolm looked at the two girls who seemed to have a bone to pick with each other over him.
"Shut up Malcolm!" both of them shouted in unison.
"Are you ready for a beating?" Blake taunted, holding her axe in a battle stance.
"Back at you!" Ashley sneered.
SARAH BLAKE
VS.
ASHLEY WOODS
==Soundtrack: Pure Ruby (Cristierra)==
"Come and get it!" Sarah shouted as the Goth Aura grew larger making Malcolm sulk and move out of the 'arena' to a corner.
"You asked for it!" Ashley twisted the handle of her bat as it burst in a red flare, granting it additional fire damage.
Fire applied to weapon. +2 to Fire Damage
Malcolm's date approached Sarah with a fantastic display of a High Jump and coming crashing down with her bat, which Sarah was able to effectively block with a Guard, using her axe.
The goth girl roared and pushed Ashley away. As she was being shoved, she hurled her bat with a boomerang effect, hitting Sarah on the forehead.
Ashley landed and reclaimed her weapon as it twirled back to her, spinning it in her hand and assuming once more a fighting stance.
"YOU BITCH!" Sarah shouted.
"Language! There's kids here!" Ashley pointed at the toddlers who were simply looking forward to a fun day with the slide at the park and were too busy now looking at these two grown women having an epic battle in the middle of a playground.
"Oh… Crap. Sorry…!" she waved to the grandparents and other guardians around her as they shook their heads in disapproval.
Ashley shook her head contemptuously as Sarah proceeded to rush towards her.
The two girls groaned, putting their backs into the following hits as they ended up clashing weapons.
A button featuring the letter 'B' presented itself in Sarah's Mind's Eye, just as a button featuring the letter 'A' appeared in Ashley's. Both buttons seemed like they were being pushed aggressively as the two girls kept pushing on further into their clash.
"Grrrh…" Blake gritted her teeth.
Ashley was quieter but still rapidly mashing her metaphysical 'A' button. As a result she presented better results in pushing Sarah back, making her lose her balance. Ashley took the opportunity for a Critical Attack as if she was playing Dark Souls and had just broken an enemy's stance.
"AAAH!" Sarah was knocked down to the snow. "You pack a punch!"
Ashley kicked her bat back up, using the momentum to spin it once in her hand and resting it on top of her shoulder. "Thanks."
Sarah got back up as she brought out something Ashley wasn't expecting. A can of Coca-Cola!
Ashley gasped loudly. "Heal scumming?! In my PvP fight?! Oh hell no!" she proceeded to twist the handle on her bat once again, making the red aura warp around itself into a green tint.
Poison applied to weapon. +2 to Poison Damage
Sarah finished downing her drink and burped, crushing the can in her hand and hurling it into the nearby Plastic Recycling Bin.
"Gross."
"You think recycling is gross?"
"The burp was gross."
"Excuuuse me, princess!" Sarah spat.
"Oh now you've done it." Ashley's eyelid twitched at the lousy reference and she took off towards Sarah with a great burst of speed.
Just as she was about to hit Sarah, she quickly maneuvered her axe to strike her side.
"What the he- GAH!" flung to the side, Ashley landed on a pile of snow.
Coca-Cola temporary effect: +1 to Speed
Sarah giggled at the sight.
"Item abuser…" Ashley got up.
"Oh shut up." Blake rushed towards Woods as the latter took a more defensive stance, blocking the incoming hits from the sugar rushed, caffeinated goth girl.
They traded more blows with one particular hit making their weapons launch upwards. They both looked at each other and both threw a punch directed at each others face, hitting at the same time, resulting in the two girls being thrown in opposite directions.
"Why aren't you affected by my Goth Aura?! It should make you all depressed and sh- stuff." She caught herself before using a swear word near children again.
"I literally don't give a crap."
"AAAAHH!" Sarah ran towards Ashley and as she was approaching, she cartwheeled and attempted to hit Ashley with a downward kick, which the latter noticed, blocked and pushed away, resulting in the goth girl tumbling forward, sticking a sick roll and regaining her balance.
Both girls stared each other down and struck unarmed fighting poses.
The pressure was on and, once more, they launched themselves at each other. Just as their weapons landed behind each one of them. Both of them stopped simultaneously and proceeded to pick up their weapons and charging right back again at each other as if nothing had happened.
It seems both fighters were about to lock each other down in a cross-weapon clash once more. But this time, the red-head grabbed her opponent by the collar and proceeded to slam her thrice with the handle of her bat, before front throwing her towards a nearby tree.
"Ow…" she complained. "I'll get splinters like th-" she got interrupted by a sudden outburst of coughing.
"I was able to apply three stacks of Poison on you." Ashley pointed her bat down at Sarah. "Wanna know what happens when I hit the fourth?"
"You wouldn't dare…" she glared.
Just like that, Ashley began bringing down her bat, stopping only when Blake screamed her lungs out.
"GAAAAH!" she screamed. "FINE! YOU WIN, JUST DON'T LAND THE FOURTH STACK!"
WINNER!
ASHLEY WOODS
Malcolm approached Ashley. "Hey. That was some good fighting."
"Thanks, but I certainly wasn't expecting to have to fight one of your groupies so soon, dude. I mean this is literally the first freaking date."
"GROUPIE!?" Sarah retorted, offended.
"Sarah, I'm sorry for leaving you by yourself at the party. But… I just…" Malcolm clumsily looked for the right words for the situation.
"It's fine. I get it." With the help of her axe, Sarah pulled herself up. "This isn't over yet!" the girl dragged herself out of the park as the kids rapidly returned to the swings and slides as if nothing ever happened.
Ashley clicked a button on her bat and it turned into a small cube that fit in her pocket. "So… Where were we?"
"Right. Uhm… You were trying to Sweet Talk me into being closer to you than I actually am at the moment by saying that besides Susie you also have me."
Ashley merely smiled wanly as she was finding it amusing that Malcolm was legitimately yet clumsily retelling the whole event before the fight had began.
"And you may have… just… succeeded." He cleared his throat.
"Does that mean we just guaranteed a second date, or something?"
"I don't know, I mean, so far so good. I guess." He chuckled nervously.
"Alright, Romeo. Let's 'pull a you' and keep walking."
"Pull a m- oh." Malcolm Walker deadpanned at a joke he hasn't heard ever since primary school.
Thankfully Malcolm does not have access to narration in-between dialogue.
And so the two 24 year olds were back to their date.
"So, what do you do for a living, Walker?" Ashley inquired looking at him.
"Well… I uhm… I'm between jobs." He responded confidently.
"Oh. That's fine. Any prospects?"
"Right now I'm questioning what I may have missed because 'entry level jobs' are asking for 3 years of experience in a specific field in addition to a well developed other specific skill."
Ashley chuckled. "If that isn't the truth. Work market is crap."
"It is." He chuckled and paused.
"I even considered just becoming an UberEats driver, can you believe it?"
"Hey, no shame in your grind. So long as you're doing something instead of doing nothing. Unless you believe yourself above jobs like that."
"Me? Above those types of jobs?" he snorted. "Nah." He responded as they came to a stop.
He would hate to admit it but part of him did feel as if he was a little above it.
"That's good. Keep your mind open to new opportunities. You never know." She smiled widely at him.
At the moment Malcolm felt as if he was that Lego man in the white suit, that people have been using non-stop on the Internet when a beautiful girl was concerned. The serene moment was broken when his phone rang.
"Ye-llo? Oh hey Arthur, what's up?"
"So uh… You can't come back home today."
"HUH?! Why not?!"
"Well… Y'know… Stuff."
"Stu- Right. Stuff. No, no it's okay. I'll manage. Thanks for warning me though."
"Oh and Malcolm, thanks for remembering to leave the car keys in my coat. And uhm… I think I saw an extremely strong Goth Aura moments ago from is everythi-"
"Yeah, absolutely and it's handled. Yep."
"Oh… well… I suppose I'll pester you about it later then. Ciao!"
They both said their farewells and Malcolm saved his phone.
"So… is everything okay?" Ashley tilted her head, looking at Malcolm.
"Uhm…" he paused. "Yeah… Yeah. Everything's fine."
"You sure? It doesn't seem like it…"
"My roommate Arthur, he uh… Has someone over."
"Oh."
"For stuff."
"I get it."
"Yeah. But we still have a ton of time, I mean- WHAA-, how is it 18 o'clock already?! Wasn't it bright outside just now?!" he looked around. "Winter is so tricky sometimes…" he pouted in utter defeat.
They stood in silence for a moment. She sighed. "Come on, Malcolm Walker. I suppose I'll be your host for tonight."
Internally, Malcolm was screaming.
"I beg your pardon?" he asked.
"Did I stutter?" she smirked as she began treading back home.
"No, no! Not at all!" Malcolm began following Ashley.
Soon enough, they were entering her apartment. "Well, mí casa es tu casa."
"I didn't know you liked Attack on Titan." Malcolm smiled in sweet and innocent surprise.
Ashley set her jacket on the back of a chair and paused as soon as Malcolm said what he did. She broke down in a genuine chuckle. "You're such a dork, Walker."
Malcolm looked around her house. "Sweet pad." He mused at the open-floor plan apartment his date seemingly owned.
"Thanks. I decorated it myself."
Abstract Painting
Rating: Seems expensive.
Video Game Poster
Rating: Seems retro. A collectors item maybe?
"Anyway, I'm going to go change. Be right back." She smiled and departed to her room.
"Uh huh…" Malcolm was too lost admiring everything around him to even listen to what she said or where she went.
Cactus
Rating: A girls best friend, according to that one magazine Malcolm picked up that one time at the hairdresser back when he was with Susie.
Large TV
Rating: Definitely Expensive
Multiple Game Consoles Organised by Date of Release
Rating: Oh my god.
Malcolm snapped out of it. "Man… This is so cool. She's so cool. Hey where'd she go?" he paused. "Maybe I'll search out the bathroom…"
And so Malcolm opened the door the end of the corridor…
Revealing Ashley in her underwear in front of her wardrobe.
"Dude! What the heck?!" she turned back embarrassed.
"Ah!" he covered his face. "Sorry! Sorry! I was lost. Needed the…" he could feel a set of hands lowering his own down from his face.
"Honestly…" she looked at him. "I think you found the right place." She then inched her face closer to his and both were locked in a kiss, creating sparks out of thin air.
The couple shivered as their eyes grew wider in amazement and joy as they relished this feeling seemingly so foreign to the both of them.
"Sparks…?" Malcolm was dumbfounded.
"Mhm…" Ashley was absolutely stunned…
They looked at each other endearingly.
"Okay but now I really need that bathroom."
She chuckled. "Middle of the hall, door to your left."
*flush*
"Besides… It's still too early to turn in for the night. We can order something through UberEats for dinner?" Ashley put on a pink pajama shirt with a bunny character on it and some shorts.
"Sure. Mind if you order? I brought cash. I was kind of assuming that we'd stop somewhere…" he chuckled awkwardly.
"That's fine, yeah."
"So what'll it be?" she brought out her phone.
Meanwhile, an hour or two ago at Susie's…
"And then… And then she hit 3 stacks of Poison on me…"
"She did not!" Susie gasped, wide-eyed. "She absolutely kicked your ass."
"Susie!" Blake called out.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry… But hey, I tried to warn you. You don't just… meddle in someone's date. Be it whoever's date it may be."
"But…"
"No buts. And I'm pretty sure, despite his faults, Malcolm made his stance pretty clear. Not meaning to defend him or anything, but I'm pretty sure he just panicked yesterday and that resulted in you being left here by yourself. Perhaps you were too… direct?" Susie tiptoed around the words she used in order to not provoke any more Goth Outbursts.
"I see…" Sarah was wide-eyed. "I understand what you mean."
"Wh-what? What do you see? What do you underst- Gah!" Susie yelped as Sarah lifted her in a loving hug.
"You're a genius!" Sarah placed Susie back down and exited through the door nigh immediately.
Susie sighed, staring at nowhere in particular, slowly lifting her phone to her ear.
"Hello, Arthur?"
At Arthur's…
"Oh hi, Susan." He teased. "Miss me already?"
"Knock it off, Casanova. We have a Code Black."
Arthur sighed loudly. "Already? Say less."
He hung up and ringed up Malcolm.
Ring… ring…
"Ye-llo? Oh hey Arthur, what's up?"
"So uh… You can't come back home today."
…
…
The call was hung up.
"And now we watch the 'ripples' do the rest." He turned the TV on and prepared to have a relaxing night by himself, despite the incoming issue that was nearly at his doorstep.
Ding-dong.
Arthur took his scotch on the rocks he had just prepared and opened the door.
"Oh hi, Sarah!"
"Is Malcolm here?"
"Actually… no. I don't think he'll be back home today."
"Oh… Okay… Can you tell him later that I need to speak with him?"
"Absolutely, darling. You can count on me." He smiled and lifted his glass towards her with a cheer.
"Thank you Arthur. Have a good night!"
Evans closed the door and took a sip of his drink, sitting down on his sofa. "Malcolm, you son of a bitch. You owe me big time." He spoke to no one but himself as he prepared to take another sip.
Back at Ashley's…
The couple was slowly following each other's lead in a dance of passion and lust towards Ashley's queen sized bed.
They laid down and proceeded to stare at each other.
"I… It's not that I don't find you attractive. But I… I don't want this yet. I'm not ready… I think…" Malcolm shyly admitted, showing a bit of his own insecurity.
Ashley gave a soft smile… and pat Malcolm on the cheek. "That's fine with me. We can take this slow. You keep making this date a breath of fresh air, Walker. I'll give you that."
"Really? I thought I was average… at best."
"Not wanting to talk about… you know… the past, when I'm currently in bed with you. But let's just say my past experiences were full of insecure guys, which by the way, is fine. Everyone has their insecurities. All of that is fine unless those insecurities translate into toxic traits that might end up affecting the other party. For example, total spazzes that are more preoccupied with looking cool other than being genuine, thus saying things they don't realize is hurtful... Or perhaps willing to give up their own opinions just to make sure they're able to feign agreeing with everything the other person they are on a date with thinks and says because 'ohmigosh we have so much in common'." She paused and sighed. "Have you ever felt something like this?"
"Hm…" Malcolm thought. "Not that I can remember… Sorry."
"See? If it were someone else they would've said yes just to agree with me." She smiled.
They shared a good while just looking at each others eyes.
They yawned and giggled at each other.
"Good night, Walker." She smiled.
"Good night, Woods." He smiled back.
A few hours later…
Malcolm's phone vibrated violently with a text message.
SENDER: XXXXXXX
NEXT TIME: The first Evil Ex-Boyfriend finally shows himself!
A.N: I realize this category is a little dead so I want to thank everyone who is reading! Do not be afraid to leave a review with your opinion or expectations! It would be a pleasure to read them.
A.N2: The first fight of the fic! I hope you guys liked it. About music suggestions, I mostly pick songs I like. Usually it would be EDM or some sort of electronic style music. Usually I write the fights with a song in mind as I already have one planned for the first of the Evil X's.
But that will be all from me today!
See you soon,
~tTM