Time is a construct, and as the narrator, I can move forward to any point in time that I wish. Hell, I could even speed forward to the school talent show if I wanted to, but then you'd miss out on all the juicy little gay romance, funny jokes, and an overwhelming amount of 'Sonickus' said by a voice actor who's refusing to perform it as written, so I would never do that. Still, time marches on, and we must continue.

It's after school now, and Sonic is with his crew at the track team tryouts. He's stretching his legs in that way anime characters do before they run, while Tails and Amy look on in total awe.

"Sonicku, you're for sure going to make captain this year!" said Amy, shaking pom poms in a cheerleader fashion. I want to emphasize that she put a lot of energy and affection into that Sonicku.

"Yeah, bro! No one is faster than you!" said Tails. For tryouts, he's donned a grey sweatshirt and black sweatpants, with a white towel around his neck as if he were a boxing coach.

"You know it!" said Sonic, striking a pose similar to his official art for Sonic Adventure 2. "I'm gonna lead the team to the state finals this year!" He looks around at his "competition," not seeing many threats. Scoffing, he's about to turn around when he sees a black blur across the field. He strains his eyes trying to keep up with its movement, eventually spotting Shadow. The new kid is barely distinguishable at this speed, flashes of him only occasionally visible.

"I tol' you they was fas'," said a red cockney accent behind him. Sonic turns to see Knuckles, holding two shotputs in one massive hand, twisting them around in a circular motion as if they were Baoding Balls.

"They may be fast, but they've got nothing on me!" said Sonic, feigning confidence. In truth, he wanted to believe that, but he wasn't sure. He'd not seen someone move like that since the last time he watched replays of his own performances.

Knuckles slapped Sonic's back, forgetting that he was still holding the shotputs. Thankfully, this is a story, and a normally crippling injury doesn't need to do so. "If you say so, li'l buddy," Knuckles said. Sonic glared at him, rubbing the shoulder where the heavy objects had hit him. He'd have retorted, but the whistle blew like it was a prehistoric bird and the foreman of a rock quarry was pulling its tail to signify the end of the working day. A large man wearing blue pants and a red sweater with a white collar rode up on his bicycle.

"Okay, champs!" said Coach Doc Lewis. "Today's the day that we fulfill the trope every story based in a high school setting has to do, and that's team tryouts! We're gonna start with the 400 meter dash, so all you wanting to participate, line up on the blocks!"

"That's my cue," said Sonic, giving a wink and finger gun to his cheerleading crew. Amy hopped up and down while Tails shadowboxed.

"Good luck, Sonicku!" screamed Amy, causing permanent hearing damage to anyone within a ten foot radius.

"You've got this, bro!" said Tails, floating like a butterfly and stinging nothing like a bee.

Sonic jogged over to the starting block. As he assumed the position, he glanced around. Shadow was right next to him, and some character that doesn't matter was on the other side. The black and red hedgehog was looking as aloof as they had when Mr. White had introduced them to class. There was something about them that was distracting to Sonic. He wasn't sure what it was. Maybe looking at Shadow reminded him of what his parents wanted him to be. Maybe there was an appeal of mystery to them. Sonic had no idea. All he knew was that he needed to focus on winning this race.

"Alright, folks!" yelled Coach Doc Lewis. "You know the drill, baby! On the starting AK-47!" He held the assault rifle aloft, and fired.

At once, Sonic's world seemed to slow down. As soon as his cat-like ears heard the iconic "pop-pop-pop," he was off the blocks. All that mattered to him was speed. Air rushed past his ears as his feet hit the ground. The students waiting for their turn on the track seemed like they were barely moving; one looked like he'd been frozen mid-nose pick, which added a much needed laugh to this otherwise cool scene. Sonic's eyes were focused on where he was running. Victory was assured, and with it, the captaincy.

OR WAS IT? In the periphery of his vision, Sonic saw what looked like a shadow keeping pace with him, which made sense, because it was Shadow. His eyes pulled away from the finish line, unable to believe what he was seeing. Shadow, however, kept their focus, pulling ahead. Sonic's mouth opened in a gasp, which, if you've ever been rolling around at the speed of sound, know has disastrous consequences. A cricket on his way to play conscience to a puppet flew into his mouth. Sonic choked, and while doing so, he choked, but in the race this time. His feet tangled up, and he began to tumble. Everything sped up in an instant as Sonic crashed to the ground, his body bouncing and rolling forward with each impact. The other runners passed him, all except for Billy the Slow Man Johnson, who was, as his name suggests, named Billy.

Sirens were heard as Tails and Amy pulled up in an ambulance. They hopped out, and put Sonic on a stretcher, much to Sonic's dismay. "Guys, I'm fine!" he said, trying to get out of the stretcher. Amy forced him back down, causing the formerly healthy hedgehog unspecified bodily injury.

"We'll be the judge of that, Sonicku!" Amy said, the epitome of professionalism. They strapped him in and pushed the stretcher into the ambulance. After a 10 second trip, they crossed the finish line, just ahead of Billy the Slow Man Johnson. Sonic had still made the team, since everyone but last place made it, but the loss of the captaincy stung. After they wheeled the stretcher out of the ambulance, Sonic glanced over to see the stupid sexy goth chatting amicably to their teammates.

How does someone like that get so fast? Sonic thought. Maybe I could have a little chat with him after practice…

It's after practice now, and the camera lingers on the entrance to the locker rooms. A hastily showered and dressed hedgehog leans against the wall, waiting for the one person he wants to talk to. After talking to a few people that weren't the ones he wanted to talk to, he finally saw Shadow ducking out of a non-gendered restroom down the hall. I say finally, because Shadow had been ducking in and out of that restroom for a full 10 minutes.

"H-hey! Shadow, wait up!" called Sonic. He knocked over a group of people as he dashed over to Shadow, causing a cartoon bowling sound effect to play. When he reached the androgynous ass hedgehog, he continued. "I'm sorry if I've given you a hard time. I'm not used to someone being on my level!"

"We have had two interactions in this narrative, I don't think you've done anything to give me a hard time," responded Shadow, but then they smiled. "As for on your level, I'm not. I'm better."

"Are you kidding? We would have tied if you hadn't distracted me!" Sonic said.

"'If you ain't first, you're last,' - Reese Bobby, Talladega Nights," replied Shadow. "Besides, it's not my fault that I'm so, how did you say it? Distracting?"

Sonic rolled his eyes like dice from a board game about taking idioms too literally. "Stop talking and start telling me how you got this fast. There's no way some scrawny alt kid could do track."

"Why not?" said Shadow, getting a little annoyed at our hero's penchant for stereotyping. Sonic, not wanting to upset Shadow, quickly walked back his statements.

"I mean, obviously you can," Sonic said. "I've just never met someone like you who went both ways."

"Wha-?"

"Sports and alternative expression, I mean…"

"Don't judge a hedgehog by their quills," said Shadow. "I've got plenty of talents beyond being incredibly beautiful and fast as fuck." Sonic thought for long enough that the silence between them became awkward. "Why are you so concerned with my aesthetic, anyway?" asked Shadow. Sonic looked up from being deep in thought.

"I just… I have bad experiences with goths," he replied. Shadow looked androgynously confused, so Sonic decided to continue. "It's my parents. They're goth as hell, and they want me to be that way, too, it's just… it's not ME, you know?"

"That's not very cash money of them," replied Shadow. They walked over to a bench and sat on it, sensing that this interaction would take the rest of the chapter. "People need to be allowed to find their own way, no matter what that is."

"Well, tell THEM that!" said Sonic, tears forming involuntarily in his eyes. "All I want to do is be a successful student with great grades and plenty of extracurricular activities, popular, and swole! They don't care, though. It's always, 'Sonic, why aren't you smoking under the bleachers? Sonic, why are you wearing jorts?' I'm wearing them because I want to, Dad, and it's not a phase!"

"Woah," said Shadow. "Chill out, man. Like, feel your feelings, but don't let them run you, you know?"

"I just don't know what to do!" said Sonic, who ironically wailed like a mid-00's emo band. "Besides, it's not like you would get it, your parents are probably insignificant to the narrative!"

"You think so, huh?" chuckled Shadow. "It may interest you to know that my parents are bigger normies than you ever could hope to be. They're literally average in everything. Height, weight, accent, narrative relevance, the whole nine."

"No way," said Sonic, snorting and blowing a comically large snot bubble. Shadow continued chuckling.

"Oh yeah," they laughed. "But it doesn't matter if I'm a goth or jock, masc or femme, both ways or not, they love me, because I'm their kid, and that's what parents do. They love and support their kid, no matter what."

"Bro what?" said Sonic, hoping that the explicitly not described hedgehog didn't mind the gendered word. Luckily, Shadow didn't care. "Parents being cool? No way!"

"Don't believe me?" said Shadow. "Why don't you come home with me for dinner. I'm sure my parents wouldn't mind. They're literally average in welcoming unexpected guests to dinner."

"You're on, handsome!" Freudian slipped Sonic. Realizing what he said, he quickly cultivated a blush on his cheeks. Shadow gave him a look of ungendered exasperation. Sonic dodge rolled to avoid the awkward silence, and then rubbed the back of his head. "Uh, let me just call my parents to tell them not to wait up."

"Think they'll object?"

"Nah, they'll be happy that I'm not home studying."

"Your parents have bizarre priorities," said Shadow, smirking like a narwhal.

Sonic whipped out his cell phone. He wiggled his eyebrows at Shadow, before cooly saying "Hey Moogle, call 'Rents!'"

"Okay, kupo! Calling 'Rents.'" said Moogle Assistant. Sonic put it on speaker, trying to look as cool and gay as possible. The phone rang a couple of times before the normal ringing was replaced by Paramore.

"Sup?"

"Hey, Dad," said Sonic. "I'm going to dinner with a friend. Don't wait up."

"Wait, really?" came the sound of Sonic's Mom's voice through the phone. "Honey, have a wonderful time! I'll leave some water and ibuprofen and a fresh joint to help with your hangover!"

"You guys don't even care who I'm hanging with?"

"Nope, don't care," said Sonic's Dad. "Alright, son, have a good time. Don't be home before 3:00, not a minute earlier!"

"Fine, Fine," said Sonic. "Smell ya later…" He hung up. Shadow smiled.

"You weren't kidding," said Shadow. "They're weird as shit."

"Yeah, it's annoying," responded Sonic. "Anyway, how are we getting to your house?"

"I think we'll figure that out in the timeskip between this chapter and the next," said Shadow, calling out the lazy author who doesn't want to think of another scene.