Disclaimer: The following is a fanfiction story. All things Dragonball are owned by Akira Toriyama and affiliated with Toei and Funimation. Please support the official release.
A Stone by Any Other Name – Memories
He never bored her.
That was the most curious part about Krillin.
This short man went out of his way each time she wanted to do something fun to ensure that she had her fun. Whether they were shopping trips – which were frequent – to light sparring sessions, Krillin had the look of a man eager to make her life comfortable.
Throughout the last year since she moved in with him at the Turtle Hermit's house, he rarely initiated a plan to spend the day. He left most decisions to her.
Any time they were short on funds for new clothes, Krillin would speed off to Capsule Corporation to ask Bulma for money. 18 began to wonder if begging the richest people on the planet to help them was making them look bad. She opted to visit the woman herself to apologize.
"No need!" Bulma chuckled. "I don't mind, really. What's a couple ten thousand zenni now and then?"
"Are you sure?" 18 asked. She swiped her hair more frequently the more anxious she was. "I'm starting to feel bad always asking you. I want to make it up to you somehow. If there's a job I can work, or I can convince Krillin to work, we'll do what we can to pay you back."
Bulma waved her off. "I've known Krillin since he was a boy and I've never seen him this happy before in his life. He helped Gohan save the world against Cell. You and he deserve it."
18 glanced away. "Well, he has been pretty cool. Sometimes I'd ask him how this outfit looks on me, and I can see how red in the face he gets."
"You're a beautiful young woman, 18," Bulma told her. The older woman wasn't a slacker on looks herself. Whatever she was doing for personal care tempted her to ask for her technique.
"Oh, uh, thank you," 18 replied. Before she realized it, an envelope was presented near her hands. "Take it," Bulma said.
18 closed her eyes. "I promise I'll pay you back," she repeated. Holding another sum of money became more embarrassing each time.
Bulma wagged her finger. "Tut. Enjoy yourselves. That's all I want. Make him happy."
Closing her hands over the envelope, Bulma patted them before she spun around. "I put in a little extra in case you want to dine at a nice restaurant," she told her before the doors slid shut behind her.
Opening the envelope, 18 concealed a gasp that would've been quite loud had it escaped her throat.
"Ehhh?! How much is that?!" Krillin asked when she showed him the contents of the envelope back at the Turtle house.
"Enough to make me feel like a complete cheapskate," 18 muttered, slouching on the sofa. She crossed her arms, nonchalantly flipping through channels on the television.
"This is way too much. We should give some of this back," Krillin said. He flipped through each bill, crisp and brand new to the touch. Watching his cheeks flare up made her realize she had done more of that herself when Bulma initially gave her the money.
"I'd like to, but Bulma insisted. We don't need to spend all of it," 18 said. She ignored the news program she stopped at and eyed the money with Krillin. "I mean, we should set it aside for something else."
"You mean like a…," Krillin swallowed, "a house for us?"
18 paused. Where did that come from?
She swiped her hair back several times. It was like an obsession with keeping that part of her hair glued behind her ear so it wouldn't fall forward. She gave him a cautious look, which forced him to tap his fingers quickly. "Sorry, that slipped out of nowhere."
"No, it's fine," 18 said, wrapping her arms around herself. "Let's worry about that later."
Dammit, what are you thinking?!
She clutched her upper arms tightly, unable to retract what she had just said. She didn't want to imply to Krillin that she was considering long-term plans with him even though they had only known each other for a year. Better come up with something fast.
They both looked ready to say something together.
"You should have a nice time together with that money," said a voice beneath them. The sea turtle that lived around the island chimed in. "Miss Bulma wants you both to have a good time, and that is what you should do."
Krillin chuckled. "Leave it to the turtle to make it official. I guess we can't avoid good charity from a long-time friend. Metro Central should have some good places we can check out. I'll go ahead and make our reservations."
18 reached for the envelope. Well, there was that fancy black dress she bought the other day with the thin shoulder straps she could wear along with those diamond earrings. She didn't want to show Krillin yet, but if this was one opportunity, it wouldn't go to waste. "Okay."
Several hours later, 18 stood before a full-length mirror examining the black dress. The dress shoes were still awkward to move in, but she'd adjust. The earrings did look fantastic as a complement to the dress, something she was eager to show Krillin. Even with minimal makeup applied, it was difficult to conceal the amount of blush in her cheeks from how stunning she saw herself. Is this why he gets red in the face so often each time I try something new?
"Are you ready?" Krillin said through the door.
"Almost!"
"Okay! I'll be downstairs!"
Her heart raced. For a cyborg programmed to be so calm and calculating in terms of combat, presenting herself before a friend she admired was more difficult than she realized. Especially considering that she'll be showing herself off in this dress.
The trek down the stairs was challenging in heels. She'd never have to account for footwear of this caliber, but they did fit comfortably when she tried them. Plus, there was also the quality of the heels that appealed to her as soon as she laid eyes on them.
Once she was clear of the staircase, she stopped when she saw Krillin in a well-tailored white suit. He fumbled with a small box in his hands as he stared back at her slackjawed.
"H-h-h-here. I, um, er, waited until the time was right t-t-to give you this," he said. If he said anything else, he'd have dropped the box containing an exotic blue, white, and pink flower 18 had never seen before.
"It's beautiful," she whispered, holding the box. Carefully releasing it from the box, she affixed it to her left strap just above the base. "How does it look?" she asked.
"G-g-g-g-g-g…," Krillin stuttered, unable to put words together. 18 took his hands. "Easy. Take a deep breath and think about each word you want to say."
"S-sorry."
Krillin closed his eyes, breathing heavily. She wondered if he might hyperventilate, but despite his face red as a tomato, his hands did relax in her grip. "Good. You look good."
She patted his head, which had hair now. No longer bald, his charcoal hair reminded her of those Saiyans. There was enough for her to move her fingers through, but she didn't ruffle it so much that it'd ruin his appearance. She liked that he wanted to present himself as a dignified gentleman before her.
"We'll take the car to Metro Central," Krillin said, retrieving a capsule from his inside jacket pocket. "I figure that we shouldn't ruin what we're wearing by flying in the sky. I found us a place while you were getting ready."
So this was it, then.
Her first actual date with the man who risked his life for her against Cell. She hated the idea of calling those outings to shop for clothes "dates" since they were more for providing an opportunity to hang out with the guy. But this being a real date meant she'd have a chance to know more about Krillin than the man who was friends with her programmed target, a decent cook, and a cool guy to watch movies with.
Taking control of the car, the ride to the mainland was relatively quiet with a small discussion about what kind of radio station would be ideal to listen to while they were on their way to Metro Central. At one point, the current station played a jazzy tune that forced her to keep Krillin's hand at bay before he changed the channel again. "Wait."
"Is something wrong?"
"I don't know. It feels like I heard this song before," she said. The singer had an elegant voice to complement the piano and saxophone playing in the background, which 18 began humming along to without realizing.
"Is this something from when you were younger?" he asked.
18 stopped humming. "It sounds new, but it sounds familiar."
"Are you sure? It's an old song from several years ago," Krillin said. "I think I heard something like this play on Roshi's radio back when I first started training with Go…ku."
He stopped himself abruptly the moment Goku's name left his lips. She knew he continued to be cautious regarding Son Goku whenever she was nearby, hoping that he wouldn't trigger some hidden program she wasn't aware of. She didn't care that Goku was mentioned, knowing the two were childhood friends. Though she was ready to chastise him for walking on eggshells when he didn't need to.
What bothered her more was the fact he casually blurted out how old the song was. If it sounded so familiar, why would it be that old? What did that mean for her?
The car was covered with a roof and a set of windows with a windshield. 18 could see some of her reflection from inside and touched her face in a few places. Am I really eighteen? Or am I much older? How old am I, really?
She immediately shut the radio off once she turned away from her reflection. She hadn't considered her age seriously before, only dismissing it as a by-product of the infinite energy core inside her. But now that she had time on her hands, the question now became how long she had this infinite energy core installed.
When they entered Metro Central, 18 gazed at the multitude of lights illuminating the city. It was phenomenal to observe, something she had never seen before – or had she?
Watching some of the buildings scroll by looked familiar, too. Was I here before?
"We're here," Krillin said.
18 hadn't realized the car stopped minutes earlier, with a patient Krillin waiting for her to acknowledge her whereabouts. "Oh."
Carrying a black diamond-studded purse with loose items and the envelope of money Bulma gave them was something new to her. Carrying anything other than clothes and shopping bags might as well be as awkward as these new heels she walked in. But she ignored it once her eyes read the sign on the restaurant before her.
"Which language is that?" she asked.
"Who cares?" Krillin chuckled. "All I know is that when I looked up restaurants, this place had a menu selection of the finest fish and seafood you could eat. I couldn't pass it up."
After they checked in and were seated, Krillin chose a bottle of champagne that was served to them in a chilled bucket full of ice. "Allow me," he said, popping the cork.
The bubbles tickled both her nose and the roof of her mouth. But it did have a fragrant taste. "I've never tried champagne. It's interesting."
"I wanted this to be more of a celebration of our victory against Cell, but I'm more glad that it's just us who can celebrate," Krillin said after he poured his glass.
She caught him raising his glass for a toast. "Um, to, to, victory?"
"To freedom," 18 added, tapping her glass against his.
"That makes more sense, huh?" Krillin said, adding with a low voice, "freedom."
As their orders arrived, Krillin joked that it was the first time he could still see the table now that he didn't have to eat with Goku. She laughed while watching him play with lobster claws and pretending to be the crustacean itself. He then pretended that the lobster was Cell and a piece of shrimp was Gohan, who knocked the lobster down with one hit. "Victory!" he cried.
18 had laughed so much she didn't realize tears had fallen down her cheeks. It drew looks from other patrons, but she couldn't care less what they'd say.
Once she calmed down, she had to pause with each bite to savor the taste. "These do taste good. I think my taste buds are back to normal again."
"How does it feel to be more human now?" Krillin asked.
He didn't shy away from the question, she realized. She never considered how much of her humanity had returned since staying with Krillin that putting any thought to it had little significance. She was able to be herself.
"I'm used to it by now. Never bothered to think about it, though."
Krillin's smile was always genuine each time she saw it. She spotted a couple of people over his shoulder staring at them with faces that loomed as though they recognized her. It had been nearly an hour since they arrived, yet most of the time had this sensation of being watched by those two.
The first to stand was a middle-aged woman, or at least that's how 18 perceived it. Her outfit was fashionable enough for a restaurant of this quality, yet the way the woman was smiling at her was somewhat familiar.
"Zuli?" the woman asked.
Zuli? Was that short for Lazuli?
18 drew a blank. It couldn't be that obvious, could it?
"Zuli. It is you, isn't it?" the woman asked, drawing closer. Krillin paused mid-sip to lower his glass. "You still look so young."
"Do I know you?" 18 asked. Something didn't feel right about this woman calling her Zuli. There had to be some mistake.
"You don't remember? It's me, Pearl. We were friends for like, forever!"
18 and Krillin exchanged looks. He pointed at the woman with a thumb. "What's her deal?"
"Beats me. Look lady, we're having a nice dinner alone, and we'd like to be left alone," 18 said, lowering her voice. Krillin knew she was good at being frosty with her voice when she needed it. The woman named Pearl didn't back away, however.
"You're sure you don't remember me? We used to stay at the same orphanage together years ago," Pearl said. Another word that didn't ring a bell. Yet the woman's voice wavered on offended somehow.
"What orphanage?"
This woman was getting on her nerves rather quickly.
"You don't remember anything?"
"No, and I didn't go on this date to reminisce," 18 said. She gave Pearl a dangerous look that she intended to drive her away, but Pearl would still not back away. Offense soon became a look of defeat.
"Oh. I was so sure you recognized me from when we were kids," the woman named Pearl said.
"Kids? You look like you're twice my age or something," 18 didn't mince the bluntness. Pearl grinned casually.
"Well, I am pushing forty, though. But it's been, gosh, eighteen or maybe twenty years? Maybe a little more? Gosh, time flies so much you don't remember the details!" Pearl said, counting on her hand. 18's stomach churned.
"Start talking," 18 said, bolting up from her chair. "You're going to ruin this night if you don't explain yourself. And I'm not in the mood for a ruined night, understood?"
"Eigh-eighteen, please calm down," Krillin said, rising from his chair. "Maybe this woman has some info about your childhood you probably forgot?"
"Eighteen?" Pearl asked. "I thought your name was Lazuli, wasn't it?"
The woman looked visibly confused, now, unable to figure what all of this meant. She paused for a few seconds before it looked like a light bulb ignited in her head. "Wait, do you at least remember someone named Gero, or Vomi, by any chance?"
18's eyes lit up. "How do you know that name?"
"They worked at the orphanage with the matron. You must remember Doctor Gero or Doctor Vomi, don't you?"
Pearl's words twisted what was still churning in 18's stomach. "Yeah, I know Gero. Vomi doesn't ring a bell. I should know it, but I draw a blank when I try to."
The man who had been with Pearl greeted them with a small bow. "Pardon my wife, she couldn't stop asking me if you were someone she knew from a long time ago," the man, who 18 nearly confused for Gero, said to her. 18 had to do a double-take at the white mustache but relaxed when she noticed that it wasn't so distinctively long as the Doctor's.
"It's okay," Krillin chimed in. "Actually, if it's alright with you, I'd like a word in private with my date."
Krillin lured 18 to a few tables down the way until he was certain the older couple was out of earshot. "Do you know something about an orphanage that was under the employment of the Red Ribbon Army? Were there any files or data you could access?"
18 was slightly annoyed by Krillin's question. He was talking to the cyborg rather than the human, which bothered her more than she realized. "How should I know? It's not like Gero would put secret Red Ribbon info inside us. And I don't feel comfortable doing this right now."
"Right. I'm sorry. I should've considered my words more carefully," Krillin said, lowering his face.
"It's fine. Let's get this over with and finish our dinner," she told him.
"Is everything okay?" Pearl asked.
18 eyed the couple and shrugged. "Well, I suppose it couldn't hurt to ask. Did you work for the Red Ribbon Army?"
Pearl froze. 18 scrutinized her face, waiting for an opening. "Well, did you?"
"No, but I did know of them. I remember seeing a few soldiers now and then, but Matron wouldn't let us snoop around or ask about them. Jade and Sapphire were the nosiest of all of us," Pearl explained. 18's face relaxed, but not enough to let her off the hook.
"Oh, I forgot to ask. Your brother, Lapis, is he still…?"
"Alive, yes," 18 said.
"Lapis?"
"Seventeen," 18 said to Krillin.
"Oh, that's good to hear. Is he, um, like you?" Pearl asked.
"Like me…?"
"Young?"
"Yes."
"I see," Pearl said. She pulled a small notepad from her purse and wrote something. She tore the page off and handed it to 18. "Here. I hope you'll find something there that'll jog your memory and help you remember."
Krillin hovered over the note and blinked, glancing up at 18. Pearl gave another quick bow. "I should go. It was good to see you again, Zuli."
She hurriedly paid for her dinner and dragged her husband out of the restaurant. When Krillin and 18 were seated again, Krillin re-read the note several times before passing it to her. "So what is it? Is it an address?"
"Coordinates," 18 said. "Probably to the orphanage she was talking about."
She had an inkling about Krillin's next question being "Do you want to go and see?", but chose to wait until he had a question to ask.
"You don't have to go if you don't want to. I won't force you," Krillin told her. 18 wanted to crumble the note or burn it with a splice of ki but instead rested her head on her hand, elbow propped on the table. "I'm sorry this night didn't turn out so well."
"It's not your fault," 18 said, opening her purse to slide the note inside. "Just coincidence."
"But she knew Doctor Gero, though," Krillin said. "That worries me."
"It worries me, too."
"You don't think he was using that orphanage as a recruitment facility for his cybernetic project, do you?" Krillin asked.
18 froze, hand gripping her purse tightly. That scumbag.
"I shouldn't have asked," Krillin said, pressing his hands together. "Please don't be mad at me."
"Huh? Oh, it's not that. It's a fair question. Maybe it's something I need to investigate tomorrow," she told him. Krillin eyed his champagne and downed it quickly.
"I'll come with you," Krillin offered, which made her hand relax on her purse. It would help ease things with him accompanying her so she wouldn't do something she'd come to regret later.
"Are you going to be okay?" Krillin asked on the ride home. "I'm sorry our date had to be ruined like that."
"Krillin," 18 said, keeping her voice still. "Don't apologize for something you didn't do, or didn't know."
"S-sorry," Krillin said, sighing quickly after. 18 gave his hand a gentle squeeze. He's cute when he's flustered.
"I don't know how okay I am with this, to be honest. Sooner or later I would've liked to explore what I forgot, but not yet."
"At least you have a place to visit just in case so we wouldn't have to dig around so much," Krillin assured her. It didn't change her mood, but it did help at least.
When they exited the car, 18 circled the vehicle. Taking his hands, she kissed him gently on the top of his head. "You're a funny guy, Krillin. I didn't know I could laugh that much."
Krillin chuckled nervously. "Th-thank you. I'm glad I could be myself around you and you don't find me awkward."
"You're too cool to be awkward," 18 said, ruffling his hair. She removed her heels and breathed a sigh of relief. What she thought was comforting was anything but, cyborg or not.
She studied the black dress after she hung it next to her denim wardrobe. Krillin noted during their shopping trips how often she chose denim-related clothing, yet she never had a definitive answer as to why she found herself lured by their aesthetic.
She went with a cute jeans and vest combo the next day to investigate this supposed "orphanage." Krillin stepped out in his usual shirt and shorts, which gave her pause.
"The coordinates lead us to Metro North. Are you sure you want to wear that while we're there?" she asked.
"Eh? Metro North?"
"Yeah. That's also near the lab where you first found Seventeen and I, remember?" 18 said. After calculating the location of the coordinates, her heart sank. It was near Gero's lab. It disgusted her that no matter how much she wanted to distance herself from what she went through with Gero, there was something that had to pull her back.
After Krillin changed into warmer clothes, she took off from the ground. "Wait for me!" Krillin shouted.
"Relax, I'm not going to stray too far from you," she assured him.
"I hope so. I can't sense you, remember?" he said. She couldn't help herself smiling, finding that amusing for some reason. Gaining a tactical advantage by not having ki to be sensed was a feature she was appreciative of, especially when it came to staying hidden from Cell.
The pair flew north until the temperature gradually dipped. Krillin began rubbing his upper arms as they were drawing closer to Metro North. "I hate cold places."
The weather never bothered 18. Either it was a feature built into her cybernetics from Gero, or she never complained about how hot or how cold it was outside.
"We can stop at a hot spring later if you need to warm up," 18 suggested, which caused Krillin to stumble mid-flight.
"Ehh?! You mean, like, together?" he asked, swallowing. She didn't answer, choosing to leave him pondering over that.
Once they flew over the city, 18 searched the streets for where the coordinates would lead them. "This way," she said to Krillin, turning left.
"Are you sure you know where it is exactly?" Krillin asked.
"If I'm given coordinates, I can calculate the location. Otherwise, I'm in the dark as you would be. Sixteen was the one who knew where Goku's house was located, as well as the Turtle Hermit's island," 18 explained. Krillin tightened his mouth.
"So without it, would you and Seventeen have lured Goku out by destroying things?" he asked.
18 stopped. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, I mean, I get it that you and he were meant to kill Goku. But would you have killed anyone else? Trunks said that you and Seventeen were different than the ones from his future."
18 considered Krillin's words. Swiping her hair back, she eyed the city below. "I won't lie to you. If it came to it, Seventeen and I would've caused enough damage to draw him to us. Our programming acknowledged that Goku's compassion was a weakness of his to exploit."
"I see. Except he never had a chance to fight you. Not in this time, and not in Trunks's timeline because he got sick," Krillin said. He sounded relieved.
He floated closer to her, watching the people below as she was. "Do you view humans differently? Are we bad people?" he asked.
18 frowned at the city below. "I thought about it now and then. You're human, but I don't see you as a bad person."
"But were there any times before you met me that you wanted to get rid of humans? Did you feel like we may have become inferior after you became a cyborg?" he asked.
She tensed. These questions were drawing ire she didn't want him to experience. "I, I don't know, okay?" 18 said, shaking her head. "I don't know."
She sped off, eager to get to the orphanage quickly. "Eighteen, wait!" Krillin shouted from behind.
When they landed, she paused, knowing he was behind her. "Look, I can't compare myself to whoever those alternate cyborgs were from that boy's future, Krillin. I don't know how I view humans from a cyborg's perspective, and I honestly don't want to."
"You're right. I didn't mean to ask so much. This wasn't what we came here for, so I won't ask anymore," Krillin said, circling to face her.
"Thank you."
They turned to read the sign at the entrance of the building. "Metro North Public Library? I guess the orphanage must've closed down some time ago," Krillin noted.
"We'll know more once we ask someone inside," 18 said, opening the doors.
"Hi, how may I help you?" a young librarian asked when they approached the kiosk.
"We'd like to know if this place was once an orphanage," 18 said.
"Oh, yes. It was. It shut down long before I was born, but the head librarian would love to tell you the history behind this place if you're interested. She's right over there on the second floor."
The woman pointed above her at the back of the library to an elderly be-spectacled woman making her rounds with a trolley full of books. 18 and Krillin made their way up to meet her.
"If you need to check out a book, you'll have to speak to my assistant down below. I'm a little busy at the moment," the head librarian said.
"We understand that this was once an orphanage. Is that correct?" Krillin asked.
The librarian stopped, gently placing a book she was about to shelve back on the trolley. "Ah, my assistant must've told you. I was once the matron who ran this…," She nearly stopped when she had a good look at 18, "place."
The librarian's face went pale. "It can't be."
"What?" 18 said.
"But that's impossible. How do you still look the same age?" the librarian said, reaching with a shaking hand to touch 18's face. 18 moved her face away as a reflex.
"Do you know her, miss?" Krillin asked. The librarian looked ready to burst into tears, nodding quickly.
"Please, come with me. We should move to a quieter place away from prying eyes and ears," she told them.
The room in question was down the stairs to the back, where offices were located for the staff. The librarian opened the door to her private office, closing the door once Krillin and 18 were in. She offered chairs for them.
"I never thought I'd live to see the day when our biggest sins would revisit us. I thought that dreadful army had done enough as it was. Even more so when I was relieved to never see that awful man and his wife."
"Do you mean Doctor Gero?" 18 asked. The name was like a dagger to the librarian's heart. She nodded quietly.
"I should've seen it coming. But I did nothing. I was under orders to keep you children in the dark about what those scientists were planning. I didn't know what they were going to do with you, but all I was told was to prepare you for selection."
18 froze after the librarian's explanation. Krillin was visibly uncomfortable in his chair. "So the Red Ribbon Army was planning to make cyborgs and androids?" he asked.
"Not the army. Doctor Gero and Doctor Vomi. There were other scientists, but as far as the army was concerned, there was a point when soldiers no longer visited this place. The doctors remained, yet still acted as though the army was in operation."
"Who was this Doctor Vomi?" Krillin asked. "We've only ever heard about Doctor Gero."
"She was intelligent. She was so kind to the children, doting on them like a mother. She also had a huge sweet tooth and would bring goods from the bakery for herself and the kids. I had to constantly remind them to brush their teeth each time," the librarian said. She smiled at 18. "You loved those chocolate cupcakes with white frosting and rainbow sprinkles."
"I sort of still do," 18 said, not realizing she still craved chocolate.
"Oh yeah, that does make sense, doesn't it?" Krillin added. "We'd always stop by that dessert place after shopping in Metro West for chocolate cake."
She gave him a look that froze him to his seat. "She doesn't need to know that."
"S-sorry," Krillin said, rubbing the back of his head.
"But that woman did hide something sinister behind all that niceness," the librarian said. She pulled out an old picture frame hung on the back wall to show them. When 18 saw the people on it, she froze.
"I know her," 18 said. "She was there with Gero when they-"
She stopped herself. Vomi was never mentioned by name the whole time she was experimented on, but those were as far back as her memories took her. Anything before then had either been suppressed or deleted by Gero. Worse, it could've been this Vomi who had done it.
The more she looked at the picture, the more the beautiful woman with oak-colored hair and that checkered blue-and-red dress rocked her memories with that emotionless grin bordering on predatory. The smile that she saw through the glass tube full of unknown fluids while she watched them work on her brother.
It was that smile she wished she could erase from her present memories for good. She quickly snatched the picture from the librarian's hands and slammed it face down on the desk, cracking the protective glass underneath.
"Eighteen, it'll be okay. She's not still alive, is she?" he asked the librarian.
"I don't know-,"
"No, she isn't," 18 said over them. She realized how desperate she sounded and eased herself back into the chair. "She's dead."
"Eighteen?" the librarian asked. "Do you not go by Lazuli, anymore?"
18 swiped her hair back. "I'm more used to Number 18 than Lazuli."
"Fair enough. I will tell you everything I can still remember. My memory doesn't function as well at my age. But I never forget a face."
18 could see the warmth behind the librarian's smile. It helped her relax, at least. "A woman named Pearl gave me the coordinates to this place. I suppose she was also one of the orphans raised here?"
The librarian's face lit up. "Oh! Why yes! Pearl was a delight to have with us. A kind family from Metrol Central took her in about two years before you and Lapis left unexpectedly. Though I guess I have an idea as to why. You two played together, and had such imaginations! You, Pearl, Jade, Sapphire, Topaz, Amethyst, and Ruby. You were all like brothers and sisters to each other, even though Lapis was your only brother by blood."
"And you took care of all of us?" 18 asked.
"I loved every one of my little darlings whenever they'd arrive. It pained me each time to see one of you go, but I worked hard to make sure your lives were the happiest they could be before you went to your new homes," she said as her voice wavered, especially when she had to look at 18 while explaining everything.
"If you don't mind me asking," Krillin interjected, "do you know what happened to the other kids? Did they find parents?"
18 wanted to give him a scolding look, but he did have a point. "Were we the only two taken by Gero and Vomi?" she asked the librarian.
"I don't know. I was not given any information about what happened to you and Lapis."
"He goes by Number 17 now," 18 corrected her.
"I see. I tucked the two of you in myself one night, and the next morning, both of your beds were found empty and made as though you were never there. All your clothes and items were left intact except the pajamas you wore to bed. I didn't see Gero nor Vomi after, either."
"I guess that must be why you changed the orphanage to a library, huh?" Krillin said.
The librarian nodded. "After the last child was adopted, I wanted to bury any dark secrets of this place and keep them until I pass away. No one knew what happened to you and La-er-Number 17, and your orphanage records were no longer in our system. All that was left of your items were placed into a box in our storage."
18 stopped mid-way through swiping her hair back. "They didn't want to leave a trail behind."
"May we see the items you put into storage? If that's possible?" Krillin asked, adding to 18, "Is that alright with you?"
18 lowered her hand before she rubbed hers together. "Yeah."
"It's quite alright, my dear," the librarian said. "Your things were still in remarkably good condition. I hope they jog something if it'll help put your mind at ease."
She led them down the hall to the storage room. Shelves full of dust that caked itself on top of boxes from decades ago were brushed aside. Some had old files from the orphanage cataloged by year on a shelf by themselves, while other boxes had names written in black marker on the side facing forward. "Forgive me for not having a good source of light. The fixture's been broken for a while now. Ah, here we are."
The three stopped by a box with "Lapis & Lazuli" written on the side. The librarian wiped the dust off to reveal the names more clearly. As she tried to lift it from the shelf, she grunted. "Oof, that's quite heavy."
"I'll get it," 18 said. She easily plucked it from the shelf and lowered it to the floor.
"Goodness, you must have quite a lot of strength," the librarian noted.
18 blew the dust off, which caused Krillin to sneeze. The librarian waved the dust cloud away before dusting her hands off. "Go ahead and take it with you. None of the other kids ever bothered to come back here to ask for their things, however small they were. Yours was the largest box among them."
The other boxes were less than a third the size of the one she brought down. There had to be a collection of toys and other assorted items inside, but she wouldn't know for sure until she returned to the Turtle Hermit's place to open it.
On their way out, the librarian, formerly the matron of the orphanage, reached up to touch 18's face. 18 didn't back away this time, lowering the box to the floor. "Look how beautiful you've become, Lazuli."
18 didn't know whether it was the elderly woman's hands that were warm or her face became warm, but she didn't object to the woman wrapping her arms around her. "I hope you eventually found a good place to stay and you're happy where you are."
18 immediately looked at Krillin. "I think I did, yes."
"Oh, look at me getting all weepy on you two. Forgive me. Please, let me escort you out," the librarian said after releasing 18. She and Krillin gave her a respective, yet gentle bow before they strolled down the street. Once they were out of sight of random pedestrians, they took to the air to fly back.
Roshi was up from his nap, watching the pair make landfall. "Was wondering where you kids ran off to," he said. He waved a flier in front of them. "Thought you might be interested in a fireworks festival taking place tonight at Metro West."
"A fireworks festival?" Krillin asked, taking the flier.
"Yep! All the better that there'll be so many pichi-pichi gals walking around the place!" Roshi exclaimed, causing 18 to drop the box onto the hermit's foot without a second thought. "I'll pass, thanks."
She ignored Roshi as he hopped around the beach, holding his foot. Taking the box inside, she laid it on the coffee table, waiting for Krillin to follow her inside.
"Are you going to open it now?" he asked.
"Yeah. Better get this over with."
It was amazing that the tape used to seal the box was still intact without years of wear. Once the lids were lifted, she and Krillin peered inside.
The first item she grabbed was a toy unicorn with most of its mane ripped off. The colors faded, leaving a barely recognizable palette of rainbow colors, with the once white color now a dull light gray. Setting it aside, she explored more of the box's contents. Two more unicorns, one pink and one lavender, both of which had faded colors and unkempt hair. There was a brush which 18 assumed was used for the manes of these dolls, placed beside the three on the table.
"I guess you liked unicorns…?" Krillin wondered. 18 didn't say anything as she continued pulling out other items.
There was a small dress that she assumed was a princess costume with a plastic tiara whose studded gems had fallen off to the bottom of the box, while other items uncovered must have belonged to 17. Comic books, nature books with pictures of exotic animals, and a sailboat were among those packed, leaving plastic containers of videotape on the bottom. One other item she noticed wedged between the tapes was a worn-out pair of ballet slippers.
18 laid the dress on her lap, studying the fabric. She thumbed through the plastic tiara. "Anything come back?" Krillin asked.
Another long pause from 18. She held the tiara, analyzing the spots where the gems had fallen off, and grabbed what was on the bottom to puzzle them together. The central fake diamond that was the centerpiece of the tiara had no adhesive left to stay on, which she pressed against the main piece to have a better view of it.
She shook her head slowly, laying the dress on top of the unicorns followed by the tiara. "Nothing."
Reaching into the box again, she pulled out a few of the video cassettes. They were labeled by year on the side, with her and 17's names above it.
One of the tapes, labeled "Lazuli, Age 10," was the first one 18 chose. She popped open the case.
"Thank goodness Roshi still has a video player. Hopefully, it doesn't have one of his special movies inside," Krillin said. That was something 18 had grown accustomed to over the last year, though at first she was compelled to smash the television set after catching the old man watching one of his dirty movies.
"You think I'd leave a tape inside once I'm done with it?" the old man said in passing as he headed upstairs.
18 made a disgusted noise. Shaking her head, she placed the tape in the player, waiting for Krillin to set the channel before pressing play.
After a moment of static, the tape began to play. It took a few seconds for the screen to adjust, but once it cleared, it showed 18 as a girl dressed in the princess outfit, adjusting the tiara on her head.
"Greetings and welcome to Princess Lazuli's esteemed birthday party," the girl said on the screen with a curtsy.
18 eased herself back on the couch, not taking her eyes off the screen. She didn't pay attention to Krillin's reactions as she remained transfixed in the video.
"This is Moonblossom," the young version of 18 said while holding up the rainbow-maned white unicorn, "she has a special gift for me today. Twilight and Jasmine wanted to give me something, too, but Moonblossom insisted her gift was the best. Now then, what did you get Princess Lazuli, Moonblossom?"
The girl took the three unicorn dolls with her to a wrapped box on her bed. The video camera recording was slightly off-angle, which prompted the girl to walk over to adjust the feed. "I bet Moonblossom spent a lot of the kingdom's treasure on this gift. It looks really expensive, so don't tell her I said that," she whispered to the camera.
When she returned to the bed, the girl opened the box to reveal a plastic wand with a star at the end. "You got me the enchanted Princess Wand! Oh thank you, Moonblossom!" the girl cried, hugging the unicorn doll.
She gently placed kisses on the foreheads of all three dolls. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
Taking the plastic wand, she waved it with a swish and a tap on each one. "With this wand, I bless you with eternal happiness, as it shall be decreed by me, Princess Lazuli. May you spread this happiness all across the kingdom."
There was a knock heard in the background. "Lazuli, it's time for dinner. You can open your presents after, okay?" a woman's voice said.
"Okay, Matron!" the girl called back. "I'm leaving the wand here with you to be protected, okay? The royal grand dinner is underway, but I promise I'll bring you three something to eat after."
She stopped in front of the camera. "Okay, I gotta go. And I also gotta return you to Matron. Here, Princess Lazuli gives you lots of kisses. Mwah!"
Blowing kisses to the camera, she reached over to switch it off, leaving a screen full of static. Krillin stopped the tape and ejected it from the player. "Wow, you were a completely different person back then," he said.
18 didn't say anything. The video didn't affect her either. It was like watching someone else on that tape who liked to play pretend with dolls. Reaching into the box, she counted through the tapes until she saw that they stopped at the age of 14.
The tapes of 17 were more filmed like nature documentaries with the younger version holding the camera and talking about a mammal that turned out to be a skunk. The subsequent video on the same tape showed him apologizing for the stench he brought in. 18 expected a tape that had the two of them, but the tapes only took place on their birthdays.
"So what's on the last tape?" Krillin asked. 18 hesitated to pass it over, uncertain what could be on it. Was her 14-year-old self different than her 10-year-old self, or more of the same? "Do you want to watch it?"
"Yeah, go ahead," 18 said. The tape slid in and after a few seconds, it showed 18's younger self sitting cross-legged holding her white unicorn doll on her lap. Much of the clothing on the younger version was similar to her old denim outfit, only the shirt she wore under the denim vest was pure black instead of black and white with stripes. She also wore a hairband to keep her hair from her face, something 18 noticed when she didn't need to swipe her hair back.
"Hey future Lazuli, it's present Lazuli," the teen began. "It's our birthday and we're another year older. We're also another year here in the orphanage.
"The boys took Lapis on a fishing trip for his birthday today, so I won't see him until at least sundown, which gives me time to talk to you, future me.
"I wrote a letter to Pearl, which I have right here. She found her forever home a few days ago and this place already feels empty. I thought maybe holding Moonblossom might help make me happy, but not having your best friend around is something no magic wand can fix.
"I don't want to tell her that I'm sad though. Her new Mom and Dad look pretty cool, I guess. Matron is still trying to find a new Mom and Dad for my brother and me, but I see fewer and fewer adults visiting lately. Pearl was always a lucky person. Maybe some of that luck will rub off on me."
The teen paused, wiping her face. "Sorry, I don't want to make you sad, future me. But I think you'll be fine. I admit, I cried every time I saw my friends leave for their forever homes, but I know that deep down, they have a good life ahead of them. And I think that's a good thing to think about too, future me. We have to think about the good things we want in our lives and the friends we make along the way that make the good things happen for us.
"Oh, and promise me that you'll still get really cool clothes, future me. That's important. And don't stop dancing, either. We have to keep practicing if we want to perform in a worldwide production.
"And I want our future husband to be sweet and charming, but not a big moron. He can be pretty, but not full of himself. And he should be strong too, like physically strong so he can protect you. And maybe he has to be someone my brother likes and is okay with letting me tease him.
"Before I go, I want to show you my birthday gift. Matron got me an early gift this morning, and I love it." The teen reached over the side of her bed and pulled up a pair of ballet slippers. "Matron wants me to continue ballet, and I think I would love that. Even without a Mom and Dad, I can travel when I'm old enough and perform in front of thousands of people.
"Did you have a good birthday, future me? I hope you did. I hope you're world famous by now and your future husband gave you something really expensive because you deserve it. So I'll sign off each video like I always do and give you a big kiss, future me. Because you deserve it. I love you. Mwah!"
Seconds later the video stopped and cut to static. Krillin pressed the eject button and once the tape was out, he slid it back into the case. 18 noticed he wanted to say something but instead laid the tape onto the coffee table. She held the ballet slippers in her hands, tracing along the fabric that had worn itself into several holes along the side and tip.
Despite watching her younger self speak, 18 couldn't find herself reacting to any of it. It was still like watching a stranger speak to her future self, speaking of a dream that never existed, and a husband that would never be. 18 wanted to be sad for this adolescent, but not a single tear was shed. She rose from the couch, lazily dropping the slippers on top of the dress, and exited the house. "Eighteen?" Krillin asked behind her.
She sat cross-legged on the sandy beach, but not close enough to the waves so they'd get her wet. She watched the water creep along the sand and recede to the main ocean body. Krillin sat beside her. "Are you going to be okay?" he asked.
"Yeah."
"Are you sure? There's a lot more tapes of you to watch if you want," he offered.
"I've seen enough."
"So nothing's coming back? Nothing in that box is stirring anything?" he asked.
"No. It's all gone. I don't know if I'll ever get them back."
"We can find a way! I know we can," Krillin said. "Let's go see Bulma and she'll figure something out. If she was able to fix Sixteen that time, she can surely fix you."
"No."
"But-"
"Krillin, drop it."
"O-okay."
Krillin hung his head before he rose to enter the house again. 18 stayed, watching the waves until the sea turtle approached her.
"I don't think it's a bad thing that we can't remember our life when we were younger. While I don't remember much of my life where I grew up, after meeting Roshi, those became the memories I cherished the most. Maybe you'll find something like that with Krillin," the turtle said.
18 didn't acknowledge him, but she listened. She couldn't give him a response, though not for a lack of trying.
She didn't want anyone watching her agonizing over the memories she wanted to come back. She wanted those childhood memories to replace the nightmares. She wanted to be that little princess again instead of a young woman strapped to a cold metal table, watching as Gero and Vomi experimented on her. She wanted to be that little girl again instead of watching her brother through a glass tube. She wanted to sleep in that room instead of a dark pod with no sense of consciousness until a button was pressed that wouldn't shut off her cybernetic functions.
She wanted to scream but forced herself to be quiet. It wasn't so much that she'd draw the attention of the old Turtle Hermit and Krillin, but she wouldn't know how she'd scream. Anger? Yeah, there would be anger. Helplessness at the lack of ability to retrieve lost memories? That would still lead to anger. Fear? There was nothing that would twist her stomach or make her heart race enough to warrant screaming in terror.
Her hands moved to the faded scars on her body where the implants were installed. Those were her body's "memories." She dug with her fingernails, expecting to pierce the skin, but considering how durable she and 17 were upgraded to be, she retracted her hand.
She wondered if Krillin had made other attempts to talk things over, but she had an inkling that Roshi wanted him to give her time and space.
18 lost track of time while she sat at the foot of the beach, going back and forth between watching the waves and studying her scars. She pressed a hand to her chest, expecting the explosive device to be there. Despite the wish to Shenron that removed it, there was still a semblance of a "phantom" bomb that she was sure remained. She pressed hard against her ribcage. "Explode, dammit," she whispered.
By the time she finally rose from having sat for hours, the sun had almost disappeared completely over the horizon by Metro West's coastline. She noticed Roshi dressed for a night out, yet couldn't care less about his quest for girls at the fireworks festival. She didn't have a goal in mind for the night and wasn't sure how she'd handle having those trinkets looming on the table, mocking her in a way.
She stormed into the house, surprising Krillin, who was busy placing the last item – the ballet slippers – in the box before placing the flaps back to close it. She scoffed loudly at the box before she went to the kitchen to pull a knife from the drawer.
"Eighteen? What are you-?" Krillin asked before he spotted the knife in her hand. "H-hey!"
"What the hell am I…?"
"H-huh?"
"If I get these things out of me, will I be normal again?" 18 asked, pointing the knife at her chest. She was ready to plunge the knife to cut herself open.
"Hey! Don't!" Krillin said, rushing to take the knife out of her hands. "What the hell are you doing?!"
She pushed the knife towards her but felt resistance from Krillin, who had his hands clutched around her wrists, holding her hands at bay. "Let go, Krillin. I need to do this."
"No, you don't!"
"Shut up! You don't have to worry about your childhood because you remember it!" 18 cried but realized that Krillin was stronger than she realized. Did he train a lot since they first met?
"I can't let you hurt yourself like this, eighteen!" Krillin yelled back. His hands went for the knife, which forced the two to fight over control of it. "Stop it! Let me do this!" 18 said, her voice increased in desperation.
"How would you know it'll cut you in the first place?" Krillin asked. 18 grunted and shoved him back. Knife still in hand, she attempted to stab her chest, but the knife bent ninety degrees, unable to pierce her skin. She tossed it aside. "Damn it all."
Krillin was back on his feet, having nearly knocked the box off the table. "Eighteen, please, let me help you through this."
"Help me with what?! Get my memories back?! They're gone! If anyone should ge them back, it's Bulma! And if that doesn't work, I'll ask her to rebuild the remote so she can shut me off permanently!"
"What are you saying?!" Krillin asked, eyes wide. 18 shoved past him and exited the house. "Eighteen! Wait!" she heard Krillin shout behind her.
"Go back home!" 18 said. She flew quite fast to make her way to Metro West, only to see Krillin in her blind spot catching up to her.
"Let me help you! Please!" Krillin shouted back. "You're not thinking rationally!"
"So what if I'm not?!" 18 stopped to face him. "What's rational about feeling absolutely nothing from watching yourself as a girl wearing things that I don't remember? How can anyone function normally like that?!"
"None of this is your fault!" Krillin fired back. He reached to take her hand, but she batted it away. "Don't touch me!" she screamed.
"Eighteen, I can see how much this is affecting you. We don't have to keep the box if it's causing you pain. We'll destroy it."
"And what will that accomplish?!" she screamed again. Her voice was shaking as she struggled to control her lower jaw from quivering so much. "I can't go back to that life anymore because I'm not a human being!"
"But that's not-"
18 aggressively batted his hand away and continued to speed off toward Metro West. The fireworks festival was underway as she soared by, caring very little about the festivities below. Krillin sped past her and stopped, arms spread out. "That's far enough!"
18 raised her hand, charging a ki blast. "Get out of my way."
She expected Krillin to cower and back off, but his face didn't change. It remained as it was, defiant. "I'll kill you. I mean it."
"No, you won't. I know you well enough that you won't go through with it," Krillin said. 18 fired the ki blast regardless, but it was batted away. "You held back."
"Why are you doing this?" 18 said. A pair of warm streaks trickled down her cheeks. "Why do you want to be friends with me?"
"I don't know why. I don't need to have a reason to be your friend, eighteen," Krillin said.
"I'm a cyborg. I'm an artificial human. I have no other value than to be a killing machine."
"That wasn't your choice to make," Krillin said. His voice was still steady as was his face. "No one should've forced you to stop being a human being."
"Well I can't go back, can I?!" 18 screamed. She stared at her hands. "I'm programmed to kill! These cyborg hands are meant to injure others! What good would they do for a civilized society?! I have nothing going for me! It's not fair to the others if I'm still around. Not even you."
"Eighteen," Krillin said, then added, "Lazuli."
"That's not my name anymore!"
"It's still yours, no matter what," Krillin said. Through her misty-eyed vision, she could detect the semblance of a smile on his lips.
"I'm a cyborg! I'm not a human being! I'm cursed to outlive everyone I know. I can't be friends with you because who will I have when you die?! You'll be dead soon, and I'll still be here, alone. Even if I had kids someday, I'd outlive them and never be with them in the other world. I can't do that to you, Krillin. I can't! I can-"
Before she realized it, she felt a pair of lips pressed against hers. Krillin's hands caressed her damp face as they kissed. She wanted to fight him off, but the way his lips felt against hers was as powerful as the effect the fireworks had in the background.
The pair floated calmly in the sky against the spectacle of lights, lost to each other's embrace as their lips moved together.
When they parted, Krillin wiped her face. "I know I can't fix what's been done to you. I know I can't bring back your lost memories. I'm sorry you had to go through those terrible things to become the person you are today. But when I look at you, when I look at those hands, I don't see a killer. I see someone capable of amazing things."
His grip was gentle against her hands. "I don't want the rest of your life to be full of bad memories. I want us to build good memories of every single moment we spend together. It doesn't matter that you can't age. I don't care if you outlive me. Because even though I can't be there for the rest of your life, I want to be happy knowing you'll be there for the rest of mine."
A gasp escaped her throat. She stifled a sob against her hand. "I'm so sorry."
She pulled him into another embrace, letting her emotions pour out against him. His grip was firm but comforting, allowing her to go through this. If there ever was going to be a good memory they built together, this was the best way to start it.