- Part 1 -
Arrhythmia
I never trust a narcissist,
But they love me.
So I play 'em like a violin,
And I make it look oh so easy.
'Cause for every lie I tell them,
They tell me three.
This is how the world works;
Now all he thinks about is me.
-Taylor Swift
"Luke is an ass." Stacie marches across the grass with Cynthia-Rose, Fat Amy, and Lilly in tow. "You need to take care of him, Aubrey. We need your help."
Aubrey grits her teeth and looks up from the daisy pile that she's creating with Chloe. Had she realized that a simple conversation with Luke on the ferry would have led to all of this, she would have thrown him overboard. "That's Beca's job." She glances down, sorting through the pile of flowers, picking out the prime ones. "He's her guest."
"He likes you." Stacie folds her arms.
"Yeah," Cynthia-Rose agrees. "And we don't want Beca to lose her job."
Aubrey places her hands behind her and leans back. "I don't care." She shrugs. Luke really isn't her problem. And Beca's 'job' definitely isn't her problem. "If you want him taken care of, go tell Beca."
"You know what he said he meant by free shots?" Cynthia-Rose asks. "He said he meant gun shots. Like winner gets to play another round for free."
Chloe dumps a handful of daisies on the ground in front of Aubrey. "That's really clever." She breathes a quiet laugh and brushes her hands against her pants.
The Bellas glare at her.
Chloe doesn't seem to mind their harsh looks. She sits down in the grass beside Aubrey, smirking to herself.
"We didn't pay for the first round," Fat Amy points out.
"You have to admit, it's still clever." Chloe slices through one of the daisy stems and slides another daisy through it. She tries to suppress another laugh, snorting as she does so.
Aubrey looks at The Bellas then at Chloe and shakes her head. "You're the only one who finds this entertaining," she points out.
"Because it's funny," Chloe replies, not looking up from the flowers. "You're all letting some guy with the maturity of a thirteen year old boy get to you."
Aubrey opens her mouth to speak, but she's can't deny Luke's maturity factor.
"He's not bothering you?" Stacie asks.
"No." Chloe looks up from her daisy chain. "Why would he be?"
Stacie shrugs. "He's trying to attack Aubrey's pink fortress."
Her fortress? Aubrey furrows her brows, frowning at Chloe when she notices her blush.
"He's trying to have sex with you," Stacie supplies.
Right. That fortress. Aubrey's face burns and she sits up straight, picking up a handful of flowers. "We're busy here," she tells The Bellas, rushing out the words. She looks down and slices through a daisy stem with her thumbnail.
"Well, I mean, maybe if Aubrey liked him..." Chloe says.
Aubrey lifts her head again. "Which I don't," she intervenes. She looks at Chloe. "Stop enabling them."
"I'm not." Chloe leans in closer to Aubrey. "I'm just saying if you liked him, I might be irritated."
Aubrey swallows hard, her cheeks growing even more red.
"Y'know that's all nice," Cynthia-Rose says, staring at them. "But what are we gonna do about Luke?"
Chloe scratches her head, flowers still in her hand, and looks up at them. "Why do you guys care so much?" she asks.
"Free shots," Stacie replies, "Remember?"
"Right." Chloe nods her head.
"We had some ideas," Lilly whispers.
Aubrey looks down at the grass and plucks a few blades, roots and all, out of the dirt with her fingertips. Getting rid of Luke once and for all isn't necessarily a bad idea. It would just be better if it was her idea. She places her palm flat on the ground and taps her fingers for a few seconds before she looks at Chloe and shrugs.
Chloe responds with a barely noticeable nod, then returns her gaze to The Bellas. "What did you have in mind?" she asks.
"C'mon." Cynthia-Rose takes a few steps backward and motions for them to follow. "We'll show you. But first you need somethin' else to wear."
Aubrey hesitates before slowly standing up, knowing those words are the prelude to regret.
xxxxx
"Aubrey, I think you brought workout clothes with you." Chloe folds her arms and leans against the wall inside Stacie's room. "Didn't you wear them yesterday morning?"
Aubrey walks in the room empty-handed, returning from throwing some of her and Chloe's clothes in the laundry. "They're dirty." It's not a lie. She sits down on the corner of the bed. Upon inspection of them, blood from the deer had stained both her shirt and pants in multiple spots. At least Chloe hadn't noticed. "Why do I need workout clothes anyway? Why can't I wear this?" She motions to the t-shirt and shorts she changed into. "What are we doing?"
"You ask too many questions," Cynthia-Rose says.
Lilly nods in agreement.
Aubrey points at herself and looks around at all of them. "I have no idea what's going on." She lowers her hand to her lap. "Chloe, ask them what we're doing."
Chloe sighs and walks over to the bed, taking a seat beside Aubrey. "Guys, come on." She chews on her lower lip. "At least just give us a hint."
"Not a hint, Chloe." Aubrey turns to face her. "A full explanation."
"I'm trying," Chloe mouths. "You know..." She leans forward with her elbows on her knees. "Maybe I could help more than Aubrey."
"Don't worry, Chloe," Fat Amy replies. "We have a job for you too."
Stacie digs through one of the dresser drawers, throwing clothes on the dresser and the floor. She pulls out a tank top and looks at it for a few seconds, then shakes her head and throws that as well.
"How much did you pack?" Cynthia-Rose asks, looking at all the clothes.
Stacie looks up. "I packed light this trip," she replies and shrugs. "Four suitcases?" She looks back down into the drawer again.
Cynthia-Rose just shakes her head.
"How much did it cost to get all that on a plane?" Chloe asks.
"Nothing," Stacie answers. "The bag check boy thought I was hot."
So much for Chloe figuring out what the Bellas are up to. Aubrey slaps her shoulder. "Focus, Chloe," she whispers.
Chloe flinches. "I am." She rubs her shoulder.
"Aha!" Stacie pulls out a black yoga romper. She gets to her feet and holds it up. "This was $88 at Urban Outfitters, so don't ruin it."
Aubrey squints at the romper then widens her eyes again, hoping to understand how something with straps that start as low as the mid-stomach works. She tries to imagine it with a shirt underneath and then, horrifyingly, without. She shakes her head and looks at Stacie.
Stacie looks down over the front of the romper then at Aubrey again. "You wear a sports bra under it," she explains as though it's the most obvious thing in the world.
That makes more sense, and foils their plan. "I didn't bring a sports bra." Aubrey gives them the best sympathetic smile she can and leans back against her hands. "I need to go. Chloe and I have things we have to do."
Chloe looks at her. "What things?"
Aubrey mentally smacks herself in the forehead. "The things that we have to do, Chloe," she replies slowly.
"Oh." Chloe plasters an awkward smile on her face. "Those things." She looks at Stacie and gives her an unconvincing nod.
"Maybe Stacie has a bra for you," Cynthia-Rose says in a reassuring voice that Aubrey doesn't find very reassuring.
Stacie scoffs. "I don't have anything in that size," she says. "She has small breasts."
"Aca-scuse me?" Aubrey frowns and narrows her eyes, self-consciously covering her breasts with one of her arms.
Chloe nudges Aubrey with her shoulder. "They're not that small," she assures her.
Aubrey reminds herself to breathe and makes a mental note that she likes Chloe a lot less when they're around the other Bellas. "They're the same size as yours, Chloe," she points out.
"I know," Chloe says. "Like I said, they're not that small."
"So, then we'll just use one of your bras," Cynthia-Rose tells Chloe.
Aubrey doesn't wait for Chloe to respond to that suggestion. If they can't find anything for her to wear, they can't go through with whatever they're doing. She closes the distance between herself and Chloe and pinches her on the arm.
Chloe draws in a sharp exhale. "I don't have any bras," she blurts out. "For under that," she adds after a second. "I don't have any bras for under that." She frowns and elbows Aubrey hard in the side.
Aubrey hisses and lowers her arm to cover the side of her ribs, well aware that neither of them are a subtle as she wishes they were.
Cynthia-Rose rubs her chin and narrows her eyes, staring at Aubrey's breasts.
"Hey." Stacie taps Cynthia-Rose on the arm. "What about mine?" She points at her breasts.
"I got it," Cynthia-Rose says. She glances at Stacie's breasts as well then pulls out her phone. "I can tell bra size just by looking at breasts and I know someone else here who wears the same size as Aubrey."
Aubrey folds both of her arms across her chest. "I'm not wearing a stranger's bra." That's like using someone else's toothbrush or something. She scoots back on the bed and folds her legs in front of her. Maybe she could just convince Beca to punch Luke if he doesn't leave her alone or something. If he likes her enough, he might not fire her. "I'll use one of Chloe's."
Chloe turns so she's sitting sideways, facing Aubrey. "I really don't have one." She glances at the romper in Stacie's hands.
Cynthia-Rose finishes her text and slides her phone shut. "There." She sits down on the edge of the bed beside Chloe. "Now we just wait."
xxxxx
"So, you're just going to do yoga on the lawn until Luke approaches you," Stacie explains, hoisting herself up so she's sitting on top of the pile of clothes on her dresser.
"What if he doesn't come?" Aubrey asks.
"You're wearing this." Stacie holds up the romper. "You wear this and a sleazy guy is going to approach you."
"What if it's the wrong sleazy guy?" Chloe asks, a hint of concern on her voice. She leans back on the bed, propping herself up on her elbows. "Maybe this is a bad idea."
Aubrey couldn't agree more.
"This is where you can come in, Chloe," Cynthia-Rose says. "We're all going to be watching from the bushes. If the wrong guy comes up, you just go out there and scare him off. Ain't no guy in his right mind's gonna approach her when you're around."
"Except for Luke," Fat Amy cuts in.
"Yeah, except for Luke," Cynthia-Rose agrees. "Cause he's that sleazy that he doesn't see you as a threat. He'll just ask if the three of you want to go out together. And then you just say yes."
"Okay," Chloe agrees willingly and nods.
Aubrey gapes at her in disbelief.
"Back to the point," Stacie says. "You're going to tell Luke that you want to go out with him, but this time, you get to choose where to go. He'll be too focused on what you look like in this outfit to say no."
"And then you tell him to meet you at the spa in town in forty-five minutes," Cynthia-Rose says. "It's that easy."
Aubrey has a feeling it all sounds a lot easier than it's actually going to be. She twists a loose string from the comforter on the bed around her finger. "Then what?"
"Then we coach you on the next step," Cynthia-Rose answers.
Aubrey hopes that the next step is just standing him up.
There's a knock on the door.
"Fat Amy." Cynthia-Rose motions her over.
Fat Amy gets up from where she's sitting on a chair and walks over to Cynthia-Rose, leaning closer as Cynthia-Rose whispers in her ears.
There's another knock.
Aubrey glances between the door and the Bellas. "Is anyone going to answer that?"
Fat Amy nods at Cynthia-Rose then walks over to the door. She opens the door a crack and peers out.
"Dude, why do you want my bra?" Beca asks.
Fat Amy grabs a sports bra from Beca's hands then slams the door in her face and locks it. "Got it." She holds it up.
"Fat Amy!" Beca pounds on the door.
Chloe's mouth hangs open as she stares at the door and at the bra in Fat Amy's hands.
Aubrey blinks, taking a moment to process the last few seconds of events. "I'm not wearing that!" she whispers loudly and gets to her feet. This has already gone too far. "I'm leaving." She walks toward the door, but Fat Amy stands in her way.
"Is Aubrey in there with you?" Beca asks. "Dude! What the fuck are you doing?!"
"Beca's out there wonderin' why we just stole her bra," Cynthia-Rose says in a low tone. "If you leave, I'm tellin' her it was for you."
Aubrey looks at the door and swallows, trying to debate her options. She turns her head to look at Chloe, but Chloe is stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to Beca. She could always fling the door open and hand the bra back, explaining the situation, but she risks someone stupidly bringing Chloe into the equation. She roughly snatches the bra from Fat Amy's hand and storms back over to the bed.
"Guys!" Beca knocks again.
"She'll get bored and leave," Lilly whispers.
"Out of all the people, you had to text Beca?" Aubrey hisses at Cynthia-Rose. She holds up the bra in front of her by its strap.
"It was a last resort," Cynthia-Rose says.
Aubrey blinks and shakes her head. "You didn't try anyone else!"
"Put this on." Stacie stuffs the romper in Aubrey's arms.
"Oh my god," Beca says from outside the door. "What the hell, Guys?!"
Aubrey looks at the door again, unable to say that she isn't at least slightly enjoying Beca's distress over the matter. She tosses the romper over her shoulder and holds Beca's bra even farther away from her. "What if I get an STD?" She isn't stupid enough to believe that she could catch a disease from Beca's bra, but she can never be too sure about the rest of the Bellas.
"From her bra?" Cynthia-Rose asks, looking at Aubrey like she's lost her mind.
Aubrey shrugs. It was a good try.
"Beca!" Fat Amy yells at the door. "Do you have herpes?"
"What?" Beca yells back. "Dude, no!"
"Are you sure?" Fat Amy yells. "Have you had sex with anyone who might have herpes?"
There is a moment of silence before Beca answers again. "If I say yes, will you give me my bra back?"
"Ehhhh," Fat Amy replies.
"Can you just tell me why you need my bra?" Beca asks.
"No, Beca," Cynthia-Rose says and turns to face the door. "Now go away. We're busy in here."
Aubrey looks at Chloe, who is covering her mouth with both of her hands. She can't be too certain, but she thinks Chloe might even be getting some entertainment out of Beca's current situation as well.
"We don't have all day," Stacie says and tries to usher Aubrey into the bathroom.
Aubrey ducks away from Stacie's flailing hand, frowning at the order. She glances at Chloe, then steps into the bathroom and tosses the clothes on the sink. Whatever alt-girl disease she could catch from Beca's clothing, she probably will.
"I'm gonna help her," Chloe says and climbs off the bed. She steps inside the bathroom and closes the door behind them.
Aubrey grips the bottom of her t-shirt and pulls it up over her head.
Chloe glances at the closed door, then sits down on the edge of the tub. "Well, we do all have the same boob size," she offers in what sounds like it's supposed to be some kind of encouraging tone. What she's encouraging, Aubrey doesn't know. There is no world in which Aubrey wants to discuss anything about Beca's breasts.
Aubrey pulls off her shorts, then folds her clothes on the sink counter. So much for Chloe helping, she thinks as she slides down her bra straps then twists the entire thing around her torso so she can unlatch it and throw it on top of the rest of her stuff. Holding her breath, she stares at Beca's bra. In the corner of her mind, she can't help but wonder if it's one that she or Chloe previously took off of her. Either way, Chloe is doing remarkably well with this. Probably because she's having too much fun mocking Aubrey in her head, Aubrey decides.
"They're going to check on us soon," Chloe says.
Aubrey turns to look at her. "I'm changing as fast as I can." She picks up Beca's bra, and, holding her breath in disgust, pulls it over her head. Beca has a slightly wider torso than she does; not by much, but enough that it's irritating as the elastic band in the bra doesn't hug her tightly enough. She grabs the romper and attempts to pull that on as well, fighting to get the tight fabric up her legs and past her waist. "This is not working out, Chloe. Since when is Stacie this much skinnier than me?"
"Here." Chloe gets to her feet and grabs the straps of the romper, tugging them out from where they're slipping inside. "I don't think she's skinnier than you, Bree. I think she just wears her clothes a lot tighter." She reaches around Aubrey and grabs the backside of the romper, pulling it up over her rear end, then slides the straps up over Aubrey's shoulder. "There."
Aubrey tugs at the fabric where it's riding up her ass.
"That's going to attract all the boys," Chloe says, smirking.
"This is not comfortable, Chloe." Aubrey tries to adjust Beca's bra.
"Maybe not, but you look hot." Chloe gives her a once over. "I'd walk up to you."
Aubrey sighs and turns to look in the mirror. The romper does hug her in all of the right places. She rolls her shoulders, trying to loosen it up.
Chloe steps in front of her. "Stop trying to stretch it out," she says and readjusts one of the straps on Aubrey's shoulder. She rubs her hands down Aubrey's bare arms, her lips forming a slight frown as she takes in the light cuts and bruises both from Bumper tripping her and from falling in the woods. "This island is doing a number on you, isn't it?"
"I'm fine," Aubrey says, pulling her arms away and folding them across her chest. If anything, she's miserable because she feels like she's in one of Chloe's pervy fantasies – standing in front of her with Beca's bra on. "Let's get this over with." The faster she can get these clothes off, the better. And by the way Chloe is suddenly eying her ass, she can probably say that Chloe is thinking the same.