Here is the fifth chapter, and I'm proud to introduce one of my absolute favorite characters to write: Karen. :) Thanks for reading, all of you, and I didn't realize how short these chapters were. Trust me, they get longer. *stares at 27 page chapter I'm currently working on*
Happy reading!

Chapter Five: When Skies Are Grey

"K-Kenny are you sure this is okay?" Karen asked quietly. Kenny nodded as they sneaked into the middle and high school pool locker room. The gym was locked up at this hour and the only reason the pool was open was because the swim team had late practices.

"We'll be real quick... I got a surprise for you," he whispered. For once his hood was down but he usually never wore it around Karen. She gave him a curious expression yet smiled a gap-toothed smile as he pulled out a roll from lunch. He had managed to steal it while walking with Kyle as he bought a la carte food. Her eyes lit up as he pulled out a packet of butter that had been squished in his backpack. The bread had gone dry but it was the freshest bread he had managed to score in months.

Kenny meticulously tore the roll, making it look as if he had made it into a perfect half. But he handed Karen three fourths of the roll, and let her have the butter. She needed as much food as she could get; she was growing so fast.

"Thank you so much!" She cried excitedly with tears in her eyes as she nibbled extra slowly on the food. They sat in silence in the boys' locker room, seated on the benches, and savored each and every bite of their dinner. "This is the best day ever!"

Karen always said that whenever Kenny was able to sneak food from the cafeteria. Her cries at night were usually from hunger, but also from having to listen to the screaming matches outside of her room. His little sister always ended up in his room, sleeping in a tight ball next to him. He never minded; at least then he knew he could protect her. And each night he found himself singing her to sleep, to drown out the yelling and the thumps and the moans.

"Mhmm," he agreed as he ate the last bite of the bread. "Karen, remember you can't tell mama or dad or Kev about this, okay?" She nodded brightly and wrapped her arms around him in a hug. They would be going home to share a packet of toaster pastries; he'd give her half of his because, "after the roll he was too full." That usually always happened.

But Karen needed as much happiness as possible because as a twelve year old girl she had suffered from more anxiety and depression than most forty year old people can stand. She always had issues with anxiety and he didn't remember a night that she didn't cry herself to sleep. So it was the little things he could do that made it so much better. And although she was twelve, she seemed more fragile to him; as if she were still a little girl. Half the time she seemed like that shy little girl she had always been.

"Okay, we gotta be quick about this. They're almost done with practice and I have to be home by 8 so I can go to work." Work. His skin crawled at the thought but he kept his determined expression and quickly shed his clothes. Karen closed her eyes and Kenny held up a towel so she could undress; she was already self-conscious of her body and she wasn't even a teenager.

After she undressed she wrapped the towel around herself and made it a point to not look anywhere except the floor. Although they had showered many times together to save water it was still awkward, especially for Karen. And Kenny was appreciative of the "privacy".

"These are like the ones in the gym only the hot water lasts a little longer," he explained, "I'll be over here," he said, then walked to the shower on the complete opposite side.

Kenny and Karen did this once a month. When they couldn't stand the bitter cold, dirty water at their house any more and wanted to actually attempt to be clean, they'd come shower at the school. They rarely did it twice a month, but it had been known to happen. They couldn't take this for granted, after all. If they got caught they would get in so much trouble, and he already had a criminal record.

"It's so warm!" Karen chirped happily; Kenny felt his own heart melt at the sound of a smile in her voice. A true smile. True happiness. He shook his head and felt his eyes burn as he realized how simple it was to cheer her up. It wasn't fair.

He took the green bar of soap and quickly rubbed it over his body. He never felt clean anymore, but at least the soap made him smell slightly better. He rubbed the bar through his hair, then scrubbed his dirty, jagged nails over his head to clean his matted blonde locks. The water scalded his body but he liked it that way.

His shower was over before it began, and he quickly dried off with someone else's towel. He made sure to dress without being in Karen's view, and managed to slip on his jeans before the door clicked open. He froze, terrified that the coach would find him, and stared at the door.

"K-Kenny?" The dark blonde sighed with relief and smiled a little at Butters, who wore a towel over his neck and a green bathing suit. He pulled the goggles from his eyes and set down his towel. "W-what're you doin' here?"

"Uh..." he didn't know what to say and cursed to himself as the water shut off.

"K-Kenny?" Karen's little voice called to him. He put his hand over his face and shook his head.

He felt Butters' eyes taking in his body and his cheeks heated. He didn't want his eyes lingering too long, after all he didn't want anyone feeling sorry for him, and quickly pulled on the t-shirt that reached his thighs. Most of his bruises were covered and suddenly he felt so much safer and not judged. With the baggy clothes you couldn't tell how thin he was; and lately he was looking like one of those kids on those sad Africa commercials.

"K-Kenny, what's going on?" Butters asked worriedly as he heard Karen. He looked back at the shower, then at Kenny, and quickly ran to the door.

"No- no Butters, wait!" He cried in alarm. He couldn't be caught; he didn't think Butters would sell him out like that. Thankfully, his fear was for no reason as Butters put all of his body weight on the door, which wasn't much.

"G-get her dressed... she'll get in trouble." Butters whispered. Kenny nodded.

"Kar-bear, c'mon we have to hurry," Kenny quietly called to her, desperation in his voice. Karen whimpered and walked out, with her hands covering her chest and waist. She quickly found the towel, and bundled up in it.

After she dried herself off, Kenny held it up so she should change. Butters watched them with a sinking feeling in his gut. This seemed so practiced, like a routine. Kenny glanced back and saw his calculating gaze, and grimaced.

"K-Kenny... you... you n-never answered my q-question." Butters murmured as Karen zipped her jacket and clutched tightly to Kenny's arm. He took her old book bag and carried it in his free hand. She tried to disappear in his side and he could feel her tremble.

"I..." he trailed off. What was he supposed to say? Admit that they had been doing this for the past ever because it was the only time they could get a clean, hot shower? There was no way information like that would be taken lightly. His parents could get in trouble again and they couldn't go into foster care. If they did he knew they would all be separated. Kenny couldn't bare the thought of not being there for Karen... or having Kevin there for him, even though he rarely was.

And his mom didn't deserve the criticism. She did what she could by working sixteen hours a day, six days a week. His parents wanted extra money on the side so they did what most poor families did and turned their unused garage into a meth lab. Except now it was mostly his dad and Kevin working on it. And most of the profit went to alcohol, weed, and cocaine.

"Ken, you...you can tell me, I-I won't tell a soul."

"Swear?" Kenny asked; he heard Karen whimper. Butters nodded and looked with worried eyes between the two siblings. "I... we ran out of hot water at the house 'cause Kevin took too long of a shower, so... we had to come here." Kenny felt his heart stammer as he lied and he swore Butters knew. His eyes lowered and Karen sniffled into his side.

But Butters said nothing, just gave him those same sad eyes, sighed softly, and accepted the answer. Though Kenny knew he was more than well aware of the underlying truth, and lie, in his words. That was the thing about Butters, he trusted even if he was more than well aware he was lying.

"O-oh, well you could've just told m-me," Butters replied softly, a blush crawled on his cheeks as he looked at Kenny. "I mean, y-you and Karen can j-just come to my house for that if you want. If-if it ever happens again." Kenny nodded and smiled softly at Butters, who looked as if he were about to cry. "A-an' if you ever need anything else, my door is always open. You know that."

"You'd do that for us?" Kenny whispered, not trying to push his luck. Karen pulled away from him and looked at Butters with astonished hazel eyes. The bright blonde nodded, then smiled at Karen, who ducked behind Kenny, much like a shy child would.

"Course, y-you're my best friend, Kenny." Karen looked up at Kenny with curious eyes. She didn't have to say a word because Kenny could read exactly what her face was saying.

"Butters," Kenny began, then shook his head, "Leopold Stotch, you are the best person ever." he said, then, without thinking, hugged him tightly. Butters blushed and wrapped his arms around Kenny, and held him one more second longer than Kenny planned. "I have to get her home and go to work, but I'll keep that in mind, okay?" Kenny said, Butters nodded and smile sadly as they walked to the door.

"I-is that really Butters?" Karen asked quietly as they walked out of the school, into the bitter dark winter. Kenny shivered and nodded, then glanced down and saw Karen's teeth chattering. He unzipped his parka and handed it to her. Graciously, she took it and he zipped and buttoned it in the way that he did for himself; to keep as much heat as possible so there would be no chill. It worked wonders for sleeping.

"Yeah," Kenny mumbled, biting his lip as his own teeth began to chatter. His body trembled from the biting wind and felt his hair start to freeze. He tried to control the tremors and kept his eyes on the sidewalk.

"You should invite him over," Karen chirped, her voice was muffled and he smiled affectionately down at her as she skipped ahead slightly. There was an extra spring in her step and for the first time her eyes seemed lit with happiness. Suddenly he didn't feel so cold.

"Oh?" Kenny asked with an amused tone. He briefly wondered if he would now be her boy target; it was better than Bridon Gueermo, who she had been obsessed with last year. She nodded brightly, then skipped back to him.

"Yeah! C'mon Kenny..." she dragged his arm as she hurried down the street. He laughed a little, and he heard her muffled giggle, which made him laugh even more. "I like him. He's nice." Kenny nodded and sighed sadly.

"I like him too..." he trailed off distantly, squeezing Karen's hand as she reached for his. She tilted her head and looked curiously at him. "And he sure is nice, inviting us to his house and all..." Karen nodded and swung their arms as they walked.

"Mommy would like him and... and maybe daddy would too." Kenny shrugged; at least half of that sentence was right. The few times their mom had met Butters she thought he was a really good kid, and honestly told him she preferred him over Cartman, and even Stan and Kyle; because they always made him end up in trouble. But she noticed with Butters the only trouble they could get in was using too much imagination.

"Yeah she would... and maybe." She hummed happily and held his hand tighter. "Now, I'm gonna be home late tonight, so you just go to my room and stay there. You can sleep with my coat tonight so you can be extra warm." He told her as they walked down street after street, until approaching the train tracks.

"Why're you gonna be home late?"

"I gotta work late," he explained simply; she didn't need to know the details. She nodded, as if that was a good enough explanation for her, and pulled the hood down slightly.

"Will you sing to me when you come home?" She asked in a voice that sounded embarrassed. But Kenny nodded and she smiled weakly; it was the best attempt at a grin he had ever seen on her face.

"Of course I will, but you better be asleep. I don't want you waiting up like you did last time. Promise?" Karen nodded and looked up at her big brother with admiring eyes. He looked away, at the snow-covered ground; he didn't deserve that look.

"Thank you for tonight," she whispered with an air of excitement in her voice. A smile tugged at his lips and his eyes stung, both from the cold and the heart-wrenching innocence in her words. He put his arm on her back and led her over the train tracks. "Especially the roll."

"You're welcome, Kar-bear," She shouldn't thank him. He shouldn't have to steal so they could ease the constant gnawing in their stomachs. He shouldn't have to sneak into the school showers to feel hot water. The fact that his little sister was a victim in this life made it so much worse for him.

He opened the door to his house and was met with the familiar stench of weed and vomit. Karen breathed freely due to her mouth being covered yet Kenny held his breath and quickly took her to his room. Stuart was cutting a deal and Kevin was getting high with his friends; she didn't need to see that.

"Kenny? Karen?" They both perked up as their mom entered the room. Her eyes were tired with bags under her eyes but she looked happy to see her youngest children. "I got dinner, why don't we just eat in here tonight?"

Karen curled up on her lap and took the offered toaster pastry. They all sat on his bed and Kenny rested against the wall as he tore his apart and offered half to his sister. Carol looked sadly at her son who remained silent and watched as Karen split it, and offered her half of hers.

Kenny's room was the cleanest in the house. He didn't like anyone in his room except Karen and he didn't like people eating in his room. All trash was taken out twice a day, and he used his parka to dust three times a week. Everything was in an order that he understood, and needed it in, and he didn't like anyone touching the few belongings he did own. But here they were and he kept his comments to himself as his knee bounced anxiously.

"How was school today?" Carol asked them both. Karen reached for her bag and pulled out a folded piece of paper in her notebook; they didn't have enough money for folders. Just one notebook for each kid.

"I got a 100 on my spelling test and a 93 on my science quiz. See?" Karen chirped, showing their mom her papers. Carol beamed and hugged Karen tightly. She kissed her forehead and examined both of them.

"Aw, baby I'm so proud of you. Look at that, Kenny! All that studying paid off. I'm gonna put these in my bible to keep 'em forever," Karen smiled softly at her mom, and curled up in her arms. Carol ran her hands through Karen's hair.

The twenty-nine year old glanced to her son and noticed his ashen face.

"How about you, Kenny, how was school?" Carol asked, he shrugged his shoulders and yawned.

"It was okay, nothin' new," he responded calmly. He was trying not to fall asleep, and Carol could see the sleepiness in his expression. It brought tears to her eyes, and she opened her free arm. He scooted to her, and rested his head on her shoulder. She caressed his back soothingly, comfortingly, and fought back tears.

"I finally met his friend Butters!" Karen chirped, Carol looked to Kenny, whose cheeks flushed slightly at that. She smiled and nudged her son on the shoulder.

"Oh?" She asked with a growing smile. Kenny scoffed and shook his head as he bit back a smile, "how'd that go?"

"He was real nice! Not like Eric Cartman at all, and really cares about me and Kenny," Karen said excitedly, Carol turned to Kenny, who flushed darker.

"Well that's real nice, I've met him before. Butters Stotch?" Karen nodded, "he's a real sweet boy, a good influence, ain't he your best friend?" Kenny gave a nod and Karen smiled as she looked to her brother. "You should invite him over sometime, kay honey?"

"Sure, mama. Are you takin' me to work?" Carol bit her lip and quickly wiped at her eyes as she nodded.

"Yeah, baby... your daddy ain't gonna be able to tonight. Kar-bear, you up for a drive?" Kenny looked at his mom and shook his head. "I'm so sorry," she mouthed and he looked away, fists clenched.

Karen looked excited as she nodded, which broke Kenny's heart as he grabbed his bag. He looked to his mom pleadingly and her lip trembled as she put her arm over his shoulder and walked out of Kenny's room with her children.

"I don't want her to see that..." he whispered, voice catching as he caught his mom crying. She sniffled and nodded as she turned the keys to their old beat up truck. Carol took her middle son's hand and kissed his cheek.

"I don't want you to have to do this," she choked and kissed his forehead, "I really don't, Kenny, if I could just drive off now and make a better life for us... but I can't. I'll find a way baby, just give me some more time." Carol told him. Kenny nodded and rested his head on her shoulder. "If I could take your place I would, but your daddy-"

"I know, it's okay, it's not so bad anymore. And you're tired and working a lot too so..."

"You're just thirteen, you should be out playin' with your friends and goofin off, not-"

"Better thirteen than a twelve year old girl," Kenny murmured as he looked to Karen, already asleep. She could sleep peacefully then, rather than restless and constantly waking up from the shouts and the thumps. Carol gave her son a miserable look and let out a shuddering sob. "Don't cry mom..." he trailed off, digging in his bag. He pulled out a wad of cash and handed her two ten dollar bills. "Here, while you're waiting for me I want you two to go to somewhere nice and eat, be warm and have fun."

"Kenny, I can't-" He shook his head and stuck it in her pocket. She wiped at her eyes and turned up the heat as they drove; she could give him some comfort while she could. "I want to tell you something, and only you," Kenny bit on the cuffs of his hoodie and looked at her with wide blue eyes. "Don't look at me like that, baby," she said with a broken voice, "you deserve so much more than I can give you. Kevin and Karen too. And I'm workin' real hard, and pretty soon I'll have enough money to get an apartment... or maybe a house to rent. Things with me and your daddy aren't working out and you three are my life. I'm finally gonna do what I shoulda done after I had Karen. We're gonna move out and I'm gonna divorce him, we'll be happy; all of us. You, me, Kar-bear, and Kev too. And... I'm not ready to tell your brother and sister, and I don't wanna tell your daddy but... I'm pregnant," Carol told him in an almost whisper. Kenny's eyes widened in awe and took a deep breath. He wasn't sure how to feel; honestly right now he just mostly felt scared. "I know it'll be tough but we'll make it, we're McCormicks. We always pull through."

Kenny nodded and stared out the window. Snow fell lightly in the early March night, and he looked ahead at the mostly empty road. He fought back the anger and the worry, the words he wanted to say, and finally turned to look at his mom. She wore a worried frown on her face and as she felt his head back on her shoulder she turned slightly.

"That's great, mama," he murmured, feeling all hope and possibility of happiness crumble away from his heart. He closed his eyes and felt the burn; he fought it off and took a shaky breath. "Hey... mom? Can you... can you sing to me like you used to?" He asked so softly.

Carol felt a tear fall as she nodded. She rubbed her son's arm and took his hand in hers. It broke her heart to see him this way and she knew it was partially her fault. Her apologies were always shrugged off and her arms were usually always empty. Except there were moments like this, and she knew being strong was wearing thin for him.

And he looked up at her with those baby blues that she never quite knew where they came from and looked just like he did when he was four years old. She knew that look all too well and it made the tears fall from her eyes even more; because he wouldn't let them.

So she sang to him; his favorite song as a baby and toddler. It was the one that still comforted him and put him to sleep when all he wanted was to stay up and be with her. With every line her voice grew shakier and shakier as she pleaded to God or anyone who could hear her to take this weight from her son's shoulders.

"You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are grey
You'll never know dear...
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away..."