Author's Note: Agh, I'm in such a good mood, so here you go.
Oh, homecoming. How I don't miss you at all... except the mosh pit we started that got us kicked out. And the parties after. But that doesn't count. So, welcome the nostalgia... or the awful memories, whichever you prefer. :)
Enjoy!
Title from "Dance, Dance" by Fall Out Boy
Chapter Nineteen: Falling Apart to Half Time
"Kenny, how do I look?"
Kenny looked up from his magazine and dropped his jaw. He blinked, did a double take and smiled softly at the girl who stood in front of him.
Karen wore an emerald green dress Ruby let her borrow that hugged her body comfortably. The skirt went to her lower thigh and was trimmed with black lace. She wore a pair of black heels Ruby had let her borrow and the necklace she had gotten for Christmas last year. Her makeup was light yet accentuated her features.
Kenny's throat felt tight as he nodded.
"You look beautiful, Kar-bear," he struggled to say. His eyes lowered to the floor and he sighed heavily; she wasn't his little girl anymore. She was... "you look like mom in her wedding picture." That was the best picture they had of their mother. Although she was barely seventeen when she had been married, and Kenny was at her hip and Kevin the ringbearer, she had once been gorgeous.
"You mean it?" She asked, overjoyed to hear she could be so pretty. Kenny nodded and she curled into him for a hug.
"Course I do, you did your hair yourself?" she nodded and he lightly touched one of the ringlet curls. "You look great." She smiled and examined her brother.
"You are not wearing that..." he glanced down to his khaki pants and the nicest t-shirt he owned. He tilted his head and she rolled her eyes. "You're going with the homecoming queen. You have to look nice, c'mon..." she trailed off, dragging him to his room. He limped slowly behind her and quickly popped two pills in his mouth before she turned around.
She opened his closet as he sat on his bed and examined the few clothes he had. Three t-shirts, one long sleeved shirt, two pairs of pants, and a pair of shorts. His orange parka was on his bed, he had used it for another blanket last night.
"Here, try these," she found a pair of black pants that Kenny was trying his best for her not to find. Mostly because of why he wore them. "Are these skinny jeans?" he shrugged his shoulders. "Oh my God!" She cried, smiling brightly as she threw them at him. "Well they look like slacks, so they'll work... and why not this..." she trailed off, pulling out a grey shirt. Kenny's eyes widened as she examined the cloth. "No, there's a bloodstain on it," he breathed a sigh of relief when she tossed the fabric on the bed; a green M poked through the folded grey shirt. "Here!" She cried, pulling out a dark grey button up shirt. "It's Kevin's but..." Kenny shrugged and pulled off his t-shirt. He quickly buttoned the shirt and pulled at the sleeves; it was too baggy yet it would suffice. He took the jeans and Karen turned around. He used her shoulder for support as he put on the pants and tightened the brace once more. As she turned around, he tucked the shirt in to the waistband and she sighed.
"Better?" he asked, she shrugged and dragged him to her room.
"You tell me," she replied, pointing to the large, full body mirror. He examined himself and grimaced. The shirt was loose and the pants made him look too skinny. Yet he shrugged and looked to Karen. "I think you look great."
"That's because you think no one is ugly."
"You are not ugly, Kenny." He rolled his eyes and brushed his bangs back. "Thanks for letting me go to the party last night..." he shrugged and grabbed a pair of scissors from her dresser.
"Not a problem," he said, bending his head out of the window. Karen looked at him curiously and gasped as he grabbed his hair and cut the handful. He tossed the hair out of her window and turned to her.
Karen took the pair of scissors and ushered him to the mirror; he had done a semi-decent job considering he simply hacked, but there were jagged bits everywhere. She snipped carefully and silently. By the time she was finished his hair was at his preferred length, the middle of his neck.
"Kenny?" she said, he tilted his head. "You said it again last night, Stan said."
"Said what?"
"The quote from the "Necronomicon."" she responded, Kenny sighed heavily and raked a hand through his hair. "And...k are you okay?" She asked gently. He nodded.
"I'm fine," was his answer and she grimaced. That was always his answer.
"If you ever need to talk... no one can go through everything on their own. But you have to be strong and face your fears."
"When did you get so strong?" He asked jokingly, she shrugged her shoulders and twisted the onyx ring on her finger.
"I... have my guardian angel to thank."
"Oh?" Kenny asked, smiling softly.
"I figured... if I had a guardian angel then bad things were happening to me and he always came when I needed him. And then I thought... maybe my guardian angel needs an angel too. I always wanted to be strong enough for him if he needed it." Karen looked at Kenny sincerely and he felt his heart leap in his chest.
"Did he ever?" Kenny asked, Karen shook her head and he smiled sadly. "Have you seen him recently?" She nodded.
"He's always around," she mumbled with a smile. "Did you ever have a guardian angel?" Kenny shook his head and walked out of her room, with Karen in tow. He slipped on his shoes and waited in their poor excuse of a living room.
"Honestly, I always asked for one... but when I heard you ask for one too... I'm just glad you got your prayers answered and he could help you. I know... I know it was rough on you."
"What about you?" Kenny sighed heavily and felt very uncomfortable. What was the sudden interest in his feelings?
"I got by, Kar. You were always my first concern. I think I turned out all right..." She sighed heavily and leaned against him as they waited for Kyle and Ike. "But... I guess my assurance was when you'd come into my room and sleep with me. I guess I needed it just as much as you did." Karen smiled softy at him and hugged him tightly. "I had a dream last night."
"You never dream." Kenny gave her a look and she rolled her eyes.
"That's the point, silly," he grumbled, "but... promise you won't tell anyone."
"Not even Butters?"
"Not yet." She nodded and zipped her lips.
"I had a dream... that I was following Death around. It looked like limbo and then everything was white and cold... like in a hospital. I just kept going after him and when I grabbed him, Death turned around."
"And...?"
"Karen, it was me. I looked at myself. I was Death."
Silence filled the room. Karen felt a shiver course through her and she looked at Kenny. She shook her head.
"You're not..."
"I don't know. But it scared me. That's the only thing I remember from last night. I don't remember anything I said or did. Except in my dream. I said that quote. Over and over again and... then I woke up here. And I'm fucking terrified." He rested his head on her shoulder as she hugged him close. Kenny relaxed in her hold and squeezed his eyes shut; he kept out the most important part. He had been Death in his dream all along... who he thought he was had turned out to be Butters. And it made his stomach churn and knot.
"You were on Oxycodone... it makes you hallucinate and do things... but I'll ask Ike to look into the Necronomicon."
"I've tried... it like... doesn't exist." Karen gave him a look and he sighed heavily. "It's the book of the dead, who would actually make that?"
"So... what all do you remember from that? Maybe that'll help me understand."
"From what... I've heard Cthulhu was one of the old ones, whatever that is. Only an immortal can kill another immortal. So... if he's an old one and he's an immortal... that makes me one of the old ones. But I don't get it. If it was a curse then how could I be one of the "old ones"? And supposedly the "Necronomicon" has all of the answers to my questions but it doesn't fucking exist." Karen nodded slowly and hugged Kenny comfortingly. Moments passed as they stayed like that, the two of them just sitting there in silence. Bunny sat at their feet and nudged Kenny's hands with her nose. He scratched her head and sighed softly.
"Kenny... your hands," Karen whispered, taking his skeletal palms in hers. She flipped them over and looked at the red, raw skin. He pulled away from her and quickly hid them under his sleeves. "When did you start again?"
"I didn't, they're just chapped," he grumbled uncomfortably. Karen gave him a look and kicked his shin lightly.
"You've been back two days. Two." He sighed heavily and shrugged his shoulders before examining his hands. They were sore to touch and cracked, some of the skin even bled. "Kenny, you're stressed already and if you don't talk to someone-"
"I'm fine, Karen..."
"Bullshit, just talk to me, please?!" She cried, causing Bunny to startle and curl closer to Kenny. He stared at the floor and scratched roughly at his hands, causing her to grab them. "Please?"
"If I don't think about it I won't do it. And I'm thinking about it and I can't help it. Where the fuck is Kyle?"
"I will tell him about this if you don't talk to me," Kenny sighed heavily and turned to Karen who smiled smugly.
"But he'll get his mother involved. There will be tests."
"Talk."
"It-" Kenny was interrupted by a timid knock on the door. He smiled bashfully at Karen, secretly extremely thankful for the interruption, and limped to the door. He unlatched the deadbolt and pulled open the half cracked door.
"H-hey..." Butters trailed off, looking nervous. Kenny eyed him up and down and grinned.
"You look dashing," he chirruped, causing Butters to blush.
"Thanks... um... there was a situation. We're meeting Kyle at his place now... but it's not too good..." Kenny tilted his head, "His parents walked in on him and Stan."
"I thought they were telling them last night." Butters gave him a look.
"You don't remember a thing from last night, do you?" he asked, sighing softly as Kenny shook his head. "Are you two ready?" Both McCormicks nodded and Karen slowly stepped forward, standing behind her brother.
They hurried to Butters' car and drove to Kyle's house. Kenny had wanted to say more to Butters, yet he looked frazzled and kept quiet. He scratched his hands as they parked outside of the Broflovski household.
"Kyle, we need to talk about this!" Sheila yelled as Kyle ran from the house, red-faced and tears streaming down his face. He wore a black suit with a purple tie and his hair was gelled down nicely. Ike ran right after him, looking terrified.
"There's nothing else to say!" Kyle screamed as he dove into the car. He trembled with sobs as heavy tears burned his eyes. "Shit..." he sobbed, burying his face in his hands. Kenny turned around and put his hand on Kyle's knee. The redhead looked up and sniffled as Kenny smiled softly at him.
"It's gonna be okay," Karen gave him a look that he ignored and Kyle choked on his breath.
"H-how do you know? My m-mom kicked Stan out... I-I can't lose him, Kenny. Even if we can't be t-together anymore... I can't..."
"It's just a big shock, I mean your parents love Stan. They always have. Once they get over the fact you're butt buddies it'll all be okay."
"Can you be any more insensitive?" Kyle snapped, glaring at Kenny who felt a pang of hurt as he caught the daggers Kyle sent him.
"Well, Stan's practically part of your family... after a couple days your mom and dad'll be fine and have a talk and everything will be fine. If it were me, it'd probably be a little different, that's all. You and Stan are gonna work out, you always do. We've all been friends since we were like two and they can't suddenly rip that from you guys." Kyle sighed heavily and rested his head on the window. Ike put a hand on his shoulder and Butters grimaced as Stan slammed the door to his house.
"Fuck it! I'm not coming home!" He shouted at the top of his lungs then kicked the sidewalk before he ran to the car. He wore a deep scowl and slid in the front seat, causing Kenny to smush next to Butters. "Fucking Christ, Kyle, it's like they're fucking homophobes."
"I don't understand how they couldn't tell when you were little. I've known all along you'd end up being together," Ike commented with a smirk, Kenny nodded.
"Yeah, dudes, I've been third wheeling it since we were three. Let's just forget about the shit now and go to homecoming." Stan sighed and looked back at Kyle who was staring out the window as tears fell freely from his eyes.
"It's going to be okay," Karen reassured softly, giving Ike a worried glance. He smiled weakly at her and patted her hand. Kyle gave a side glance, then took Stan's hand from the side of the seat.
"Uh... Karen?" Ike mumbled, blushing a little. Kenny glanced back at the flustered boy. Karen looked at him curiously, waiting for him to finish speaking. "I just wanted to say you... you look real nice." She blushed a little.
"Thanks, so do you." Stan caught Kenny's eye and gave a thin smile to his "brother". Butters kept his eyes on the road and remained silent.
"Ky, they were bound to find out sooner or later," Stan piped up, causing the redhead to scoff and wipe his eyes.
"That is not how I pictured it happening!"
"You know a dinner-confession would be an epic failure. At least it wasn't like how Shelly found us." Kyle laughed a little and shrugged his shoulders. "It's just the thing to set my parents off, somehow raising a bisexual son is something that can be a "valid" argument for bad parenting," He grumbled as he rolled his eyes. "I can't fucking wait to get out of that house."
"M-my dad's a fucking hypocrite. He pushed me to be straight because he was bi-curious h-himself and if m-my parents knew I was gay well... well I'd p-probably go back to st-straight camp."
"Well then I'd bust you out and we'd go on an adventure," Kenny said with a smile, causing Butters to roll his eyes and smile a little. "When my dad thought I was gay he stabbed me. But I provoked him so it was kinda funny."
"WHAT?!" Kyle shouted, an inherited trait from his mother. Kenny pursed his lips and Karen covered her face in her hands.
"I told my dad it was his fault I liked sucking dick. 'Cause it was his idea for me to hook in the first place."
"Wait, what?" Karen snapped, eyes sharp on her brother. Butters glanced at Kenny and saw his eyes were slightly unfocused. He grimaced; he was high... and he wasn't sure on what.
"Kenny, what the hell did you just say?" Karen asked angrily as she watched her brother.
"I don't fucking know, Kar. I just say things sometimes."
"Bull fucking shit!" She screamed, causing her older brother to jump. "Is that why you're so messed up? Did dad really do that?"
"I'm not..." he trailed off, pulling his fingers away from his other hand. His skin was beneath his jagged nails and he sighed heavily. "I'm not messed up. I'm fine. We'll talk about this another time, Karen. Alone." She looked out the left window and folded her arms over her chest.
The six arrived in silence and quickly got out of the car. Kenny watched as Kyle leaned himself against Stan comfortably as if he didn't care about questioning eyes and what people thought. Stan held him close and led the way. Karen took Ike's hand and followed after, not even looking back to Kenny, who suddenly felt incredibly guilty. Butters poked his side and he looked up from the ground.
"Thanks for asking me to go with you."
"Of course," Kenny murmured, smiling as Butters hugged him, "you look amazing." Butters blushed and took Kenny's hand as they started walking.
"You do too," Kenny shrugged and perked up suddenly.
"I forgot!" He chirped, digging in his pocket. Excitedly, he handed Butters a paper boutonniere. "I made these in class on Friday, sorry if they're bad." Butters grinned and pinned the blue recycled paper flower onto his suit and beamed at Kenny.
"I love it. Thank you, I completely forgot about boutonnieres." Kenny grinned toothily and put his arm around Butters as they walked into the gym.
Strobe lights, disco balls, and pounding dance music filled his ears as he looked around for his friends. The gymnasium was completely dark and muggy due to the dancing people. Butters held on to him tighter and Kenny squeezed him gently; he wouldn't let go if Butters didn't want him to.
They sat and talked for a little bit, but Butters wanted to dance. Stan and Kyle were in a large group as they all "raved" to "Sandstorm" and after the song, Stan pulled him onto the dance floor.
"You should come!" Butters had shouted over the speakers. Kenny shrugged his shoulders then pointed to his knee; he probably shouldn't dance. The blonde sighed heavily and told him he'd be back in a few minutes; that had been a half an hour ago.
Kenny didn't mind really. He liked the atmosphere. Everything was loud and bright and chaotic and appealed to him in so many ways. He could do without the smell of overpowering sweat but he couldn't complain much. Watching everyone have fun was his way of doing things; he wasn't used to being an insider now; everyone had moved on an entire ten months in their lives and yet Kenny was still stuck in the past because the past was his present. Everything was a chaotic mess and he couldn't cope and put the pieces together to move forward. So he simply watched them have fun; it was all he knew how to do. Besides, soon they'd be gone and he'd be left with nothing but those memories. Seeing them happy was what made him happy.
Except he couldn't stop scratching his skin. He couldn't shake the "wrong" feeling and he had a feeling he'd always be uncomfortable. Kenny sighed heavily and rested his head on the table as he watched his friends dance. He didn't understand why he couldn't just let go.
"All right everyone!" The DJ said as he cut the music. "It's time for the homecoming king and queen to dance!" Cheers were heard and some people laughed as Stan and Butters remained on the dance floor as everyone else left the floor. "This is a surely a unique pair we have here... so we should do something a little different."
Stan smiled nervously at Butters, who took his hand and smiled back.
"You ready to do this?" Butter glanced to the table and saw Kenny watching, looking vacant. He nodded.
"O-of c-c-course," he stammered, blushing as Stan's hands rested on his waist. They both furrowed their eyebrows as Secondhand Serenade's "A Twist in My Story" played through the speakers. "I-I thought it was gonna be Taylor Swift." Stan nodded and laughed a little.
"Yeah, tell me about it. She's a fucking cunt," both boys laughed out loud at this and seemed to relax; this wouldn't be so bad.
"So are... are you okay?" Stan nodded and glanced to Kyle who was watching as he talked with Cartman.
"It wouldn't be a big deal with my parents if it were someone else. But... it's me so it's a big fucking deal. They like Kyle, so it'll be okay. After a week my dad's gonna be asking who's pitching and who's catching and my mom will want to take me shopping even though I hate shopping." Butters smiled adoringly at Stan and patted his shoulder as he spoke.
"Well I'm real proud of you... I sure wish I could tell my folks. I doubt I ever will... they'll probably arrange a marriage for me." Stan scoffed yet knew this was potentially true, and that was sad.
"My whispers turn to shouting
The shouting turns to tears
Your tears turn into laughter
And it takes away our fears
So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I had just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you..."
The music played loud over the speakers. They had found their own rhythm and were dancing quite comfortably. It wasn't awkward, they were best friends, and the fact they were making a stand to the school made it so much cooler.
"Stan?" Butters asked quietly, feeling embarrassed as he met the blue-grey eyed boy's gaze. "I... I'm kinda worried about Kenny."
"You don't say..."
"You are too?" Stan nodded and sighed heavily.
"It's just not something we talk about."
"Well, we need to talk about Kenny."
"Isn't there a movie with that title?"
"No, that's Kevin."
"Huh."
Both boys locked their eyes on each other and burst out laughing. Neither quite understood how the exchange was funny, except to them it totally was. And that was okay.
"Anyway, I mean yesterday he seemed fine. But today he's totally off. Something's wrong."
"He's been off for awhile, Kyle thought maybe he started cutting himself but I've seen him in the locker room. But... I dunno. He hasn't seemed quite right since..."
"Since his mom and Karen got in the accident." Butters mumbled. That had been nearly two years ago already. He knew Kenny would never fully heal from the self-inflicted wounds he gouged upon himself that night. He knew he wouldn't allow himself to. Perhaps that's why he was so... unhinged. "But there's something else."
"I'll help you in anyway I can, dude. I know how you feel about him... and he's like my brother. I want him back to normal, too." Butters smiled and hugged Stan as the song ended. People clapped and Cartman booed, but that had been expected. "Thanks for dancing with me, you make a good partner." Butters blushed and lowered his eyes.
"Y-you're welcome, you do too. I didn't even think a-about people w-w-watching." Stan nodded and walked up to Kyle with his arm around Butters. "Sorry for..." he trailed off, eyeing Cartman, "making a big deal about earlier..." he trailed off, catching Kyle's gaze. Kyle shrugged, laughed a little and smiled gently.
"Like I said, not a big deal."
"This next song is a slow song! So for all you couples out there, come on up and dance." The DJ cried, and the opening to "Something" by The Beatles played and Butters watched as Karen and Ike slowly, timidly walked up onto the dance floor. He turned to Kenny and saw him watching with a fading smile, and began to walk over to him.
"Kenny, you should dance..." Butters chirped as he put his elbows on Kenny's shoulders. "Would you dance with me?" If he didn't know any better, Butters would say Kenny had been crying. But he knew Kenny wouldn't cry; he had only ever cried twice that Butters knew of; and he had been completely rattled and traumatized both times.
"I'm sorry I'm a shitty date," Kenny mumbled, scratching at his hands on the table. Butters grabbed them and sat next to him.
"You're bleeding..." he trailed off, examining Kenny's hands as best he could in the dark. Kenny shrugged and smiled softly. "And you're not a shitty date, you're just feeling shitty. D'you wanna talk about it?" Kenny grimaced and shook his head; look where that had gotten him with Karen. Talking didn't do any good. If he spoke then the worst things about him came to the surface. And he couldn't face the fact that he was completely useless and insignificant. He could see it now; everyone was better off without him.
"I'm feeling like I'm not... all here, I'm sorry... I'll dance in a little bit, I promise." Kenny said with a smile. Butters sighed and nodded and gave Kenny's shoulder a squeeze.
"Well, if you change your mind about anything... dancing or talking... I'm here, always," he whispered. The taller blonde felt his lips curl slightly and he nodded.
"Thanks, Lee."
Butters returned to stand next to Stan and Kyle, who were talking with Bebe and Wendy about something. He didn't pay much attention to their conversation, but watched Kenny from a distance. He was completely detached; it made no sense. Perhaps it was part of the process of coming back to life? Except it had been two days; he should have "all his ducks in a row" by now. But he didn't know how that worked, anyway. He still found it difficult to believe. But he played his part well and wore the brightest smile he could as Kyle dragged him out for a throwback "Gangnam Style."
After a few 'club songs' most of which people decided to grind against each other in barely appropriate ways, another slow song played. Butters started toward Kenny but watched Karen approach her older brother and he stopped. She said something to him, Kenny shrugged his shoulders and she threw her hands exasperatedly.
"Did Kenny say anything to you?" Stan asked Butters quietly, he shook his head and watched Karen drag Kenny out onto the floor.
"Everything's fine, he said."
"Kinny's always "fine"," Cartman weighed in on the conversation before returning to a debate with Wendy. Butters considered this, and it appeared Kyle and Stan had too.
"Well obviously it's not..." Kyle trailed off, "but what else can we do? If he won't open up then there's no point in trying anymore." Butters felt his heart ache. He'd never give up on Kenny, his friends wouldn't either, but he was worried. This was supposed to be their first date; if this was how Kenny behaved on dates then Butters would just forget it. It was a bummer and he hated being sad.
"You're moping," Karen murmured to her brother as they danced together slowly. His arms rested on her back and she had draped hers around his neck as they swayed to the slow pop-electronic song. Kenny shook his head and smiled down at her. "You can't give me that, I learned the fake smile from you."
"Why did you have to break me down,
So badly this time?
Why did you have to break me down,
So badly this life?"
The song by To Be Juliet's Secret played over the loudspeakers. Kenny tightened his grip and blinked.
"I'm not trying to, I just can't move around a lot." he looked down to his leg and she rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry... about in the car..."
"Why did you have to run on a night,
Like this?
I thought, I made it so beautiful.
I tried, my best to make it perfect for you.
Because, you were always so perfect for me."
"Kenny... please, let me help you. Just talk to me. You said people can't go through things on their own and-"
"I'm different and you know that." Karen scoffed and looked at her brother in disbelief as he swayed with her gently to the song.
"All I ever wanted was to fly away with you.
All I ever wanted was to fly away with you..."
"When were you going to tell me about dad? When were you going to tell me you were a prostitute? When are you ever going to tell me anything, Kenny?" She whisper-shouted to him, tears burning her eyes. Kenny wiped them away and felt his own throat tighten as his eyes stung.
"So I guess if you go down, I'm going down with you.
So I guess if you go down, we're going down together.
(All I ever wanted, was to fly with you.)
So I guess if you go down, I'm going down with you.
(All I ever wanted, was to fly together.)
So I guess if you go down, we're going down together.
(All I ever wanted, was to fly with you.)
So I guess if you go down, I'm going down with you.
(All I ever wanted, was to fly together.)
So I guess if you go down, we're going down together..."
"I don't know. Not right now, Kar-bear..." he murmured with a sad smile. She shook her head.
"Well, it's happening now." Kenny sighed heavily and held Karen close to him. He couldn't let her go. He couldn't ruin her.
"I was fourteen, you were twelve. We were real low on money so I helped out with what I could. Dad just set it up. I've never lied to you, Karen."
"But dear you were so scared that I would, let you fall.
But dear you were so scared that I would, let you fall.
But I don't (but I don't) see (see) how I could when, (could when) I can't even take my eves off of you.
But I don't see how I could when, I can't even take my heart off of you."
She made a choked sound and squeezed him in a hug. Her head burrowed in his shoulder.
Kenny bowed his head and she kissed his forehead. "Kenny, you're falling apart. What did mama always say to you?"
"Live each day the best you can," He murmured, conspicuously wiping his eyes.
"Because one day... it'll all be gone, and you can't put your friends and me through this worrying. It's only been two days, and I know sometimes you come back different... and it's been longer so maybe you're a little off still... but please, please, just let us help you. You might be immortal but you're still a human. I love you, Kenny. You're the only person I've ever been able to count on, I've only ever felt safest with you."
"All I ever wanted, was to fly away with you.
All I ever wanted, was to fly together.
All I ever wanted, was you..."
Kenny and Karen stood on the dance floor as the song ended, still holding each other. He flinched as she wiped his cheek and she shook her head with a sad smile.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, she rolled her eyes and laughed as small tears rolled down her cheek.
"We're not finished, Kenny. But for the love of God do not be sorry." She whispered to him as they approached his friends. Karen plastered a smile on her face and clapped him on the shoulder. "Look who I managed to get a dance out of?" She chirped happily, Kenny smiled softly and shrugged his shoulders. He turned to Butters, who wore a face of worry, and took his head.
"Do you... do you wanna go dance?" Kenny asked him quietly. Butters looked up, Cartman's eyes widened, and Kenny smiled.
"Uh... y-yeah, of course." Butters grinned and took Kenny's offered hand. As they walked to the dance floor, Kenny swore he heard Cartman say, "what the actual fuck?!" and Kyle start to yell at him.
Butters smiled toothily at Kenny as he felt his hands tighten at his hips. The shorter blonde looped his hands over Kenny's neck and their distance was closer than most of the others on the dance floor.
"I don't know this song," Butters murmured, Kenny laughed quietly and listened for a few moments.
"It's The Civil Wars. Karen likes them," he responded, looking deep into Butters' eyes as they swayed slowly.
"You only know what I want you to
I know everything you don't want me to
Oh your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine
You think your dreams are the same as mine..."
Butters blushed as he felt Kenny rest his head on his shoulder; he was scared about what other people would say or think. But he relaxed, this was Kenny, and leaned his head against Kenny's.
"Are you o-okay?" Butters asked, he felt his heart twinge as Kenny shook his head.
"But I will be." Kenny murmured with a smile. "You don't have to worry about me."
"Oh I don't love you but I always will
Oh I don't love you but I always will
Oh I don't love you but I always will
I always will..."
Butters rolled his eyes and chuckled softly. He comfortably ran a hand through Kenny's hair and wanted to kiss him so badly. He refrained.
"But I always do." Butters mumbled to him, "I like your hair cut," Kenny snorted and pulled his head back up.
"Thanks," he smiled a genuine smile, "it was a joint project between Karen and I. I think I scared her when I stuck my head out the window and just chopped it off." Butters' jaw dropped and Kenny fluffed his choppy hair a little bit. "That's how mom used to cut my hair when I was little. That's why it was all spiky and bad." Kenny sighed heavily, "I'm sorry I've been a bummer."
"I'm just worried," Butters replied, smiling weakly. "Cartman l-looked like he shit a brick w-when you asked me to dance." Kenny smirked and glanced to his friends. Stan was talking excitedly to Kyle and Wendy and Cartman stared at them in disbelief with a twitching eye.
"Well, then," Kenny mumbled hot in his ear, "I wonder what he'll do when I do this."
Butters opened his mouth to ask what Kenny had in mind but found a pair of lips silence him in a breathtaking kiss. His first instinct, out of fear, was to pull away, but then he found himself drawn into the touch and the passion in the way Kenny's lips sought companionship. He ran his hands through Kenny's hair and felt the taller boy hold him close as Butters parted Kenny's lips with his tongue, seeking entrance. Kenny's lips enclosed around his tongue and gave a gentle suck, causing Butters to shiver and his knees to buckle. His hands trailed down Kenny's back, kneading his fingers into the taught muscles and bones he could feel, and Kenny's skin twitched beneath his touch. Their tongues met halfway and danced together, neither fighting for dominance; just searching, connecting, seeking more and more passion from the other.
"I wish you'd hold me when I turn my back
The less I give the more I get back
Oh your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
I don't have a choice but I'd still choose you..."
Butters jumped as he felt something fall onto his cheek. He wiped the skin as their kiss continued; he could hear Cartman having a fit, and he felt another drop. He opened his eyes, lips still locked with Kenny's in their gentle way, and saw Kenny's lashes were wet. Butters wiped the tear falling from his eye lid and held him tighter as they communicated in the way Kenny knew best.
"Oh I don't love you
But I always will
Oh I don't love you
But I always will..."
The song continued this repeat, each phrase getting louder and louder. Butters felt Kenny's shoulders tremble and he felt tears fall from his own eyes as held him tightly. Something was wrong and Butters just wanted to help but he had no clue what to do. He wasn't used to this Kenny. He was vulnerable. Butters parted their lips as the song end and felt Kenny rest his forehead on his.
"Kenny, what's wrong?" Kenny's eyes glittered and for a moment Butters saw childlike fear and sadness that gripped to the very depths of his soul; it felt like the life had been choked out of him.
"Just... just stay," he whispered and Butters felt tears leak from his eyes as he held Kenny tightly and swayed slowly. The music had switched to another slow song; Florence and the Machine's "Heavy in Your Arms." Butters briefly smiled at the irony.
Karen watched the display and felt her heart ache as she watched her brother shake. She had seen it before, when she faked being asleep when they were both little and he would finally let his emotions out. But his friends were unaware of the slight movements.
"Fucking faggots... I can't fucking believe Kinny," Cartman grumbled, going into another rant. Wendy hit him, then glanced at Stan, who sent her an appreciative smile, and she smiled back.
Ike slowly walked up to Karen and blushed a little.
"Do you... do you want to go dance again?" He asked bashfully. She smiled and nodded, then took his hand as they quickly walked onto the dance floor, a good distance away from Kenny and Butters. Yet Karen could see Butters was whispering in Kenny's ear.
"Thanks for coming to homecoming with me," Ike murmured, Karen rolled her eyes and smiled.
"Of course, best friends take on freshman homecoming and the world together, right?" Ike laughed quietly and nodded slowly.
"Right." Karen knew that voice. She looked up at Ike, who was a couple of inches taller than her, and tilted her head.
"What's wrong?"
"Is it... is it ever awkward talking to your brother about things? Don't get me wrong, I look up to Kyle, but I find it really difficult to talk to him about relationship stuff. He ends up just telling me how he and Stan have worked through their problems."
"Go to Kenny, he'd be happy to help. He's like a relationship guru." Ike's cheeks flushed and he shook his head. "Why not?"
"He'd kill me!" Karen shook her head and sighed heavily.
"It's just weird for me because he sees me as a five year old girl. He's starting to warm up though; but that's just because I'm his sister. He's really easy to talk to though." Ike sighed and raked a hand through his hair.
"No... he wouldn't."
"Why not?"
"Because... I dunno... I just couldn't..."
Stan and Kyle quickly looked away from the younger siblings and turned their attention to Kenny and Butters. They were still dancing, they hadn't let go of each other since the last song, and it was reassuring.
"We should..." Stan trailed off, tangling his fingers with Kyle's.
"You want to?" Kyle asked, smiling softly, sadly up at Stan, who nodded.
"I've wanted to the entire night." Kyle squeezed his hand and lead him to the dance floor.
"Me too, love of mine." Stan smiled and wrapped his arms around Kyle, causing Cartman to roar in anger and Wendy to argue with him once more. Stan shook his head and laughed out loud as Kyle stifled his own snickers in Stan's chest.
Butters brushed the hair from Kenny's forehead. Kenny looked at him with slightly bloodshot eyes and Butters couldn't help but think he looked so young. He was a mess, completely shattered; something had happened, something was very wrong, and Butters was going to help him piece himself back together.
"Lee, I... can I talk to you?" Kenny asked, taking Butters' hand in his own. Butters nodded and ran his thumb over Kenny's skin; it felt rough and dry. They walked out of the gymnasium and to the bathroom, unbeknownst to them four pairs of eyes had watched them, and as they entered the empty bathroom, Kenny sat on the floor. Butters took a seat beside him "I need help."
"With what?"
"When I was little... I didn't really have a way to vent about my parents arguing and all the shit that went down. So I'd try to control what I could. My room was my place and I'd only stay there. I couldn't stand the other rooms, they were heavy... I couldn't breathe. My room was my place. I could control my room and I could control myself. And somewhere down the line I started a habit and I couldn't stop myself no matter how hard I tried but-"
"Ken, masturbation is not a habit."
Kenny burst out laughing, it felt good to laugh, and Butters blushed darkly. He shook his head and his eyes were bright with humor.
"No, Lee, I didn't mean masturbating... holy fuck, thank you..."
"O-oh..." Kenny flashed his pearly whites momentarily then looked at his hands.
"No, I have to have everything a certain way in my room. It might look clean to some and messy to others but it has to be that way to me. And when I get bad I wash my hands because it makes me feel clean, but I'm not clean, Lee, I'm never clean. I'll never be clean. And other times I'll just scratch at myself and I can't stop... I've been doing it all night." He held up his hands and Butters winced at the fingernail scratches that scraped his skin raw.
"Well, what's bothering you?"
"I can't do this, it was too long this time. I'm not used to football, I'm not used to how everyone has changed, I'm not used to school... and I had a dream."
"What happened in the dream?"
"I was following Death in limbo. Then Death turned around to face me and it was me who was Death and suddenly I looked to who had been following me."
"And?"
"It was you."
Butters faltered and took Kenny's skeletal hand in his.
"It was just a dream, Ken. I once had a dream I was on a search with a stripper who was turned into a dog and we had to find his lover," he reassured uneasily; that seemed very unsettling to Butters. Kenny blinked once.
"How'd that turn out?"
"We drove all around Colorado and found his lover, a stripper. And then the stripper kissed the dog and then the dog turned into a stripper and the stripper turned into a dog." Kenny snickered and Butters laughed quietly, "my point is dreams don't make sense. Sometimes they do but usually they're just completely random. You took Oxy last night, that makes you hallucinate. It's probably because you just came back and you're not completely yourself yet."
Kenny sighed heavily and nodded. "I'm still not over it, either. I probably won't be for awhile. I remember that night like it was yesterday. I had been so cold to you before. I didn't want you to never come back and not realize that I love you. I remember kissing you until you stopped breathing... I remember your blood on me and I didn't even try to wipe it off until it dried because it was warm and it was you and it was all I had left. And now you're here but there is something wrong and... I never want to feel like that again."
"Go out with me," Kenny whispered, resting his head on Butters' shoulder. His words echoed off of the bathroom walls and vibrated in his heart.
"W-what?"
"Leopold, will you go out with me?"
"Like... a date?"
"We have two more of those lined up and I should wait til then but I just... want you."
"You mean like... boyfriends?" Butters asked, Kenny nodded.
"Yes. Will you, Leopold James Stotch, be my boyfriend and better half?"
Butters gasped and felt his heart stammer in his chest as he pressed his lips against Kenny's. Kenny took his hand in his and squeezed.
"Yes, of course, a million times yes. Kenny, are you serious? This is like... I-I've waited three years for that." Kenny smiled and hugged Butters to him tightly. "Oh my God, I'm your b-boyfriend." Kenny smiled and nodded, "we just became boyfriends in a bathroom."
"Not my classiest moment..."
"I love it," Butters whispered, and smiled as Kenny pulled him in for another kiss. Suddenly things were shaping up to a good night.
The last song played at 11:30 and the rush of underclassmen surged through the exit. The boys hung around until most of the people were gone. Kenny had a cigarette at the stop sign across from the school, and gave Karen his "blessing" to go with her friends to Village Inn; it was a big step for him.
Stan and Kyle didn't want to go home, in fact they wanted to go anywhere near their block. Kenny had nearly finished his cigarette and was mildly hungry. They ultimately decided to go to Butters' house for the night after he let slip that his parents were out of town until next Friday for a romantic getaway, or so they said. Considering it was Halloween they figured they would watch horror movies and play video games until they passed out. As they walked to Butters' car they saw some children still trick-or-treating but mostly the junior high kids were out vandalizing and playing pranks.
"My parents aren't there... so we can stay up however late we want. I've got a couple of scary movies and we can make caramel apples or cookies or somethin'. Anyone want a pizza?"
"Lee, chill," Kenny murmured, causing Butters to blush as he felt his hand rest on his knee. "But we should totally make caramel apples. Or just give me the caramel and you all can have apples." He paused, waiting for response from the backseat. "Oh, come on are you two seriously making out?" Butters heard the sound of lips smacking apart.
"Uh... we're usually in the front seat." Stan mumbled a little breathlessly. The sound of Kyle kissing Stan's skin filled the car and Kenny turned around, slightly straddling the passenger seat.
"Dude, why are your pants off?!" He cried, staring at Kyle, who whipped his head around, took Kenny's hair in his hands, and tried to tug him to face the other way.
"Turn around!" Kyle yelped as Kenny slapped his ass.
"You really can't wait five minutes?" He asked curiously, watching Stan's chest heave with deep breaths as Kyle hovered over him.
"Kenny, for the love of God, shut the fuck up and turn around." Stan gasped as Kyle ground his hips into his while he sucked violently on his exposed skin. Kenny made a face, and turned his head to Butters, who giggled at his mocking expression.
"Wait," Kyle piped up, voice a little whiny as Stan did something Kenny couldn't help but think about. "Since when do you call Butters Lee?"
Stan groaned in annoyance and Butters chuckled as he slipped his right hand off of the wheel.
"You are such a cockblock," Kenny murmured with a smirk to Butters who laughed at his comment. Stan punched the passenger seat.
"Does it matter?" Butters asked innocently.
"It's just weird-" Kyle was interrupted by a gasp and he quickly stifled a moan. "D-do you not like- oh God- being called "Butters"? Fuck don't stooooop..." he mewled, Kenny hit his head on the headrest and Butters giggled quietly.
"No, it's okay, Kenny calls me Lee or Leo just 'cause he can. But I don't mind being called Butters, honest." He lied; he just didn't want anyone else to call him by his real name. It seemed like Kenny's thing and he wanted to keep it that way.
Kenny gave an awkward squeal as Butters squeezed his ass and snaked his hand in the back of his jeans. He buried his mouth into the headrest and kept quiet as Butters massaged his inner thigh.
"If-if you guys wanna set up the X-Box or somethin' in the basement Ken and I can make pizza and snacks."
Stan agreed in a moan and went back to making out with Kyle in the basement.
As they pulled into Butters' driveway Stan and Kyle high-tailed it into Butters' house, stumbling and laughing in a mess of tangled limbs along the way. He shut off his car and pulled his hand from the back of Kenny's pants as he turned around.
"You okay?" Butters asked, noting the blonde's flushed cheeks and parted lips.
"Mhmm..." Kenny hummed. His breath hitched as Butters nipped at his neck. He sucked hard on his skin; he wanted to mark him. Kenny gripped his shoulder as he gasped.
"We should... go in... and start... nnnnnngh..." Kenny gave up speaking and tilted his head back as Butters crawled on top of him.
"Ken, is it bad to say I'm considering maybe having sex with you?"
"I coulda told you I wanted to do that two years ago," Kenny breathed heavily as Butters rolled his hips against him. He slipped his hands out of Butters' grip and hurriedly unbuttoned his shirt. Butters unzipped Kenny's pants and began to unbutton his shirt as well.
"Is this bad?" Butters asked as he pulled off his shirt. Kenny shook his head and captured his lips in a feverish kiss. Butters moaned quietly and pulled his belt from the loops.
"I don't think so. It's half of what people do in relationships."
"What's the other half?"
"Go on dates, hang out, cuddle, fight..." Kenny trailed off as Butters nuzzled his neck and gently kissed his skin. "God, Lee, you have no idea what you do to me." Butters chuckled and trailed his fingers down Kenny's abdomen.
"I think I have an idea..." he met Kenny's gaze, stared into his lust hazed eyes, and stroked his flushed cheek. "You look pretty like that."
"Pretty?"
"Mhmm." Butters hummed, careful to avoid Kenny's injured leg as he lowered himself onto him.
"I am too damn tall for this car," Kenny grumbled, throwing his head back and hitting it against the door handle.
"What about for my kitchen counter?" Kenny's eyes opened and he laughed a little giddily as Butters whispered in his ear.
"What has gotten into you?" he asked, running his hands up Butters' back. The smaller boy shivered as he nipped his earlobe.
"I dunno, some super tall, hot guy asked me to be his boyfriend and I said yes so..." Kenny smirked and tenderly kissed Butters lips. They remained like that for a few moments, until Kenny's stomach growled. His cheeks heated in embarrassment and Butters chuckled.
"Let's go see about some snackage, I guess..." he trailed off, "but consider the counter."
Kenny chuckled as he shakily zipped his jeans and sat up. Butters was already off of him and standing outside of his car; the tall blonde quickly joined him. They entered the house and headed straight for the kitchen. Butters turned on the radio to drown out the not so hushed noises from the basement.
"I have a couple of pizzas and some stuff to make caramel apples. I got ice cream and we can make cookies. We also have lots of cereal and pasta. What sounds good?"
Kenny scrunched his lips to the side as he considered this.
"Here's what we do. Pop a pizza in the oven, eat the cookie dough, save the ice cream, and cut apple slices and dip them in caramel because I have unattended business to take care of," he growled, shoving Butters against the counter, causing the smaller boy to let out an appreciative squeak. He lifted the boy in his arms and sat him on the marble top. Butters wrapped his arms around Kenny's neck and kissed him gently as he pushed the sleeves off of his shoulders. Kenny's dress shirt fell in a heap on the floor and Butters' hands roamed Kenny's bare skin. Butters arched his back and lifted his hips as Kenny pulled down his suit pants and took off his shoes and socks. He sat on the counter in nothing but his boxers and he couldn't help but laugh in disbelief at his situation.
Moments of passion had passed and in a flurry of skin and kisses and quiet moans and gasps, Kenny was in his boxers stroking Butters' cock and leaving tender love bites down his torso. Butters' eyes were closed his head leaned against the cupboard as pleasure coursed through his body. Every touch sent shivers and tingles down his spine and his blood was boiling with lust as Kenny kissed his hip bones.
He bit his arm as Kenny's mouth took his hand's place and he sucked on Butters. His hands scratched Kenny's scalp and tugged on his choppy hair, causing the boy who was giving him head to moan and dig his nails into Butters' thighs as he continued his ministrations. It was total bliss and Butters lost himself in the moment. He didn't care how he went from being worried about Kenny to having him between his legs working his sweet magic and prolonging what Butters knew would be the hardest orgasm he ever had. Kenny knew exactly what he was doing; he managed to stop before Butters reached his peak and it drove him insane.
His desperate mewls and keening voice as he cried out his name sent a chill down Kenny's spine as he hungrily lapped at his pre-cum and licked around Butters' head playfully.
"Please, Kenny, please, oh..." Butters cried out as Kenny's cheeks hollowed while engulfing him completely down his throat. He couldn't help but thrust; Kenny had been prepared for this and managed to avoid choking. Butters' hips moved erratically and Kenny pinned them down as strongly as he could as he finally milked him to a violent orgasm that caused his entire body to spasm and jerk as wave after wave of pleasure coursed through his blood, through his mind, and his seed shot into Kenny's mouth. Kenny swallowed it all, save for what he couldn't manage to take and accidentally covered his lips and nose. He laughed brightly as he wiped it off with his finger and licked it sensually, causing Butters' softening dick to twitch painfully.
"You look funny," Butters panted as Kenny tried to touch his tongue to his nose and failed miserably. Kenny gave him a seductive look as he grabbed Butters' hand and used his finger to wipe his cum from his face. With pseudo-innocent eyes, Kenny sucked his index finger in his mouth and dragged his teeth gently down the skin. "You are such a slut..." Butters teased, causing Kenny to bat his eye lashes and laugh quietly. "In a good way."
"Only for you, darlin'," Kenny replied before capturing Butters' lips in a gentle kiss. Butters didn't like the taste of himself on Kenny's lips and tongue but he liked the feeling of Kenny's swollen lips on his. "We should really put in that pizza." Butters gave him a look and curled his foot up as he rubbed his toes against the uncomfortable-looking bulge in his skinny jeans.
"You're still hungry?" Kenny smirked and shrugged his shoulders.
"Little bit." Butters giggled and ran his hand through Kenny's hair as he wrapped his legs around his waist. Kenny took a step back, onto Butters' discarded pants, and fell with a thud onto his back. Butters yelped worriedly as he saw Kenny's closed eyes.
"That fucking hurt," Kenny grumbled, rubbing the back of his head, "I think I broke my butt bone."
Butters snickered and kissed his jawline as he undid his jeans like he had in the car. "Jesus, right to the point." Butters pressed kisses on his chest and pulled down his pants.
"Mhmm, I wanna make you feel better," He murmured against Kenny's pallid skin as his fingers danced over his ribcage. Kenny hummed quietly and squirmed as his fingers pressed underneath his ribs. "Oh my God, you're ticklish."
"No 'm not," Kenny whispered, smile fading fast. Butters' eyes gleamed mischievously and he poked him in the same spot. Kenny yelped and jerked away from Butters' touch yet he was pinned down as the smaller boy straddled him.
"That is adorable," Butters drawled, pressing his thumbs into Kenny's protruding hip bones, causing him to arch his back and moan quietly. He continued kissing and slightly torturing Kenny as his hands and mouth moved southward. "You know... I am kinda hungry, maybe I should put in the pizza."
"Maybe you should suck my dick," Kenny offered innocently with a smile as he looked down at Butters who burst out laughing.
"I dunno, pizza sounds really good." Kenny scrunched his face as Butters' hand gently brushed over the fabric of his boxer briefs.
"Fine," the darker blonde countered passive aggressively, raising his eyebrows at Butters. The bright blonde boy gave him the same look and lowered his mouth to his underwear, where he teased Kenny into squirming and practically flailing as he pleaded with Butters in a breathy, higher pitched voice than normal. "Oh God..." Kenny gasped as Butters slipped his boxers passed his waist and licked up his shaft. "Please..."
Kenny let out a stream of unintelligible moans and keens as Butters' mouth enclosed around his cock. Butters held down his hips and slowly took his entire length in his mouth as he fought off his gag reflexes. He felt Kenny's hand in his hair, reassuringly running through the tendrils as Butters slowly bobbed his head.
He felt Kenny jerk his hips slightly and Butters looked up at his blissed out expression. This was completely against what he thought was right but he was extremely curious as to what Kenny would do. As he sucked harder on his cock that practically poured pre-cum, Butters dug and dragged his nails against his skin.
Pleasure coursed through his veins as the high pitched mewl practically screamed from Kenny's mouth at the painful scratches. Butters soothed the skin by massaging slowly.
Kenny stifled his moans with his other hand as Butters drew him closer and closer to orgasm.
"Lee," he gasped in a shudder against the boy's ministrations. He screamed in bliss as Butters dug his nails in the back of his thigh and bottom of his ass. "Oh God... oh fuck..." he moaned repeatedly.
Butters stopped his movements as he heard a thud.
"Wha- why'd you stop?" Kenny asked breathlessly, his body trembled in anticipation. Butters' eyes flickered to the door and shrugged before he went back to suckling on his cock and burrowing his nails into Kenny's skin. He could feel Kenny's body twitch and he kept his mouth on his member as he engulfed him as far as his throat would allow without choking.
Pounding feet were heard and Butter' eyes widened as the basement door opened.
"Guys, where the fuck is the food?" Stan barked as he and Kyle walked to the kitchen. Kenny was on the absolute verge of orgasm, he could finish him off or not get caught and leave him in immense pain...
"Fuck, fuck fuck..." Kenny sobbed, body quaking under Butters' touch. "Don't you fucking stop..."
"Jesus Christ!" Kyle cried, causing Butters' mouth to instinctively jerk from Kenny's arousal. "My EYES!"
Stan backed out of the room in hysterical laughter and Butters blushed profusely as he used his body to cover Kenny, who was concentrating very hard on either not coming or not losing his hard on... or both, Butters couldn't tell.
"They didn't even put the pizza in!" Kyle yelled to Stan, who roared with laughter. "I... I need brain bleach..." he trailed off, walking out of the kitchen. Kenny's eyes met with Butters' and he shook his head.
"Do not leave me like this..." Kenny begged, "please?" Butters considered this. He looked at the desperation in Kenny's eyes, his flushed cheeks, his heaving chest, and lengthy cock resting rock hard on his stomach. He could feel his body trembling slightly and Butters smiled softly.
"I think we should make some pizza and watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas,"" Kenny whined as Butters sat up and quickly pulled his boxer briefs and pants back on.
"But... but..."
"Shh..." Butters whispered, kissing Kenny's swollen lips. "It'll be totally worth it. Don't touch yourself or your ass is mine," Butters growled in his ear before nipping the lobe. Kenny stared at him with shocked, lust blown eyes and looked shocked at Butters' change in mannerisms.
"Jesus fuck, why aren't you like this all the time?" Kenny asked, voice trembling as he hesitantly dressed himself, wincing and trying his very hardest to not just finish himself off as he zipped his jeans.
Butters shrugged his shoulders as he popped the pizza in the oven and turned the temperature to 450 degrees.
"I'm just trying different things, I notice you like to be scratched. And you're so used to being this dominant superior guy... I figured why not turn the ropes?"
"It's fucking sexy, that's what," Kenny murmured, rubbing himself against Butters' ass.
"Stop. Now." Butters growled, turning and glaring at Kenny who appeared to be struggling. He then giggled and rested his head on his shoulder as Kenny trembled.
"Evil..." Kenny whispered as Butters sliced apples almost professionally. In sexual-tension filled silence they worked together to prepare a decent snack for the rest of the night. Actually, it was more like Butters was working extra hard to find the best junk in his house so Kyle and Stan wouldn't comment while Kenny sneakily dipped his index finger in the caramel dip.
"Guys... is it safe?" Kyle asked meekly. Kenny sighed and closed his eyes as Butters' brushed his hand over the front of his jeans.
"Yes!" Butters squeaked, smirking at Kenny who gave him the same look. Stan and Kyle entered the kitchen and sat on the counter. Kenny's eyes locked on to the other blue pair and they snickered.
"Oh dear God..." Stan groaned, sliding off the counter and sat on a chair. "So what's the deal?"
"We're making food," Butters replied simply, sitting on the counter. His legs dangled and kicked softly as he tried to avoid laughing.
"No... with you two. Are you like... a thing or a couple or what? Because I really don't think platonic friends would suck each other off."
"I thought Kenny got hurt... I was worried." Kyle grumbled, casting a glare to his tall blonde friend who conveniently found a very interesting magnet on Butters' fridge.
"Well, he kinda did." Kenny gave an awkward laugh as Butters spoke. The raven haired boy made a disgusted face and pinched the bridge of his nose. "But I guess to answer your question, yeah, we're dating."
Kyle made a choking noise as he looked between Kenny and Butters. Stan cried out, "finally!" as he threw his fists in the air and Kenny was playing with the magnet as he tried his best to distract himself.
"Since when?"
"Since we talked in the bathroom at homecoming. Sorry about... umm..." Butters trailed off as he set the plate of apple slices down next to him. Stan and Kyle shrugged their shoulders and laughed softly.
"Dude, it's your house. Congrats, by the way," Stan clapped Butters on the back and shoved Kenny playfully. "Besides, we kinda destroyed your basement guest room." Butters stared at the couple in front of him in slight disgust and sighed heavily.
The four boys headed down to the basement after the timer on the stove went off. Kenny carried the pizza, stomach rumbling as he smelled the cheese and pizza sauce, and Kyle and Stan had set up the DVD player.
"So, we chose "Shaun of the Dead", "The Nightmare Before Christmas", "Sweeney Todd", and the new "Evil Dead". Which one d'you want to watch?" Kyle asked, holding up the four choices. Butters grimaced; he had gotten "Evil Dead" to look cool, he didn't actually want to watch the movie. Kenny shrugged as he laid back comfortably on the couch and took a piece of pizza.
"I'm not in the mood for "Evil Dead"," Kenny mumbled, Stan scoffed.
"C'mon, it talks about the "Necronomicon", you were obsessed with that for years." Kenny's ears perked at the mention of the book.
"Yeah, but they totally just made it evil and have it be about possession and that's fucking stupid."
"Like you know what the actual "Necronomicon" says. You'd be solving a historical literary mystery if you actually knew," Kyle added, Kenny sighed heavily and suddenly felt a little squeamish. He set down the slice of pizza and Butters smiled weakly as he laid against him.
"Compromise- "Sweeney Todd"?" Butters suggested, "O-or Shaun of the Dead, 'cause that's funny." he took Kenny's hand and squeezed gently. Kyle agreed, and Stan popped in the Nick Frost and Simon Pegg duo movie.
Except after a few minutes of the movie they started talking and joking around. Kyle and Stan were throwing around quotes from the movie and Kenny was searching for something in his pocket; he grinned as he pulled out a rolled joint and wiggled it in front of Butters.
"I-I dunno, I don't want my parents coming home and smelling it." Kenny thought for a moment.
"Do you have any cologne? Cheap cologne." Butters tilted his head. Stan dug in his bag and handed him a small bottle. "Dude, Calvin Klein is not cheap."
"I got it for a gift." Kenny sighed and pulled out his lighter from his back pocket and lit his joint. He took a drag, held the smoke in as long as he could, then breathed it through his nose. After a few more puffs, he handed it on to Kyle, who took it graciously. "Don't worry about the smell," Kenny murmured, voice a little coarser than usual. Butters sighed and took the stick from Kyle after he took a couple of hits.
Stan hushed them all as his favorite scene from "Shaun of the Dead" played. He currently had the joint and was watching and laughing as he heard the most famous quote from the movie.
"Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phil "Sorry!", grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. How's that for a slice of fried gold?" Stan quoted along with it and laughed to himself with lit eyes. Kenny shook his head and stood up. He took a few steps away from his friends and flicked the lighter. He sprayed the cologne and Butters squeaked in fear; he didn't want Kenny to burn himself. His eyes widened as the tiny flame suddenly turned into a momentary blow torch.
"Whoa..." Kyle trailed off, Kenny smirked and sprayed Stan's cologne a couple more times.
"I dunno how it works but I used to use Kevin's all the time. But his was fucking Axe and smelled like shit so it didn't matter. Somehow it gets rid of most of the smell though."
"Cool... keep going," Stan trailed off, watching as Kenny began to spray the cologne in a quick pattern, causing the flame to sort of dance as they turned into mini-mushroom balls.
Pretty soon the entire room smelled like Stan and Kenny looked a little woozy as he handed Stan back his bottle of Obsession. He sat down next to Butters and rested his leg on the coffee table.
"Guys, do you think we'll always be like this?" Kyle asked as their attentions slowly turned from the movie. Butters nodded and pulled a blanket over himself and Kenny. The taller blonde seemed to appreciate the warmth and curled his feet under the fleece.
"Of course, we're in a really fucked up brother-boyfriend relationship." Kenny replied, "that sounded way wrong. But you get it." Stan nodded.
"Yeah, like... like Kenny is like my brother, and Butters is like my brother. And you two are together. And Stan and I are together but you're like brothers to each other. But we're not blood related so it's okay."
"But we did the blood oath when we were eleven." Kenny countered, picking up his abandoned piece of pizza.
"Oh. Well fuck me twice, brotha." All of them snickered.
"Are you implying a four-way?" Kenny asked brightly, Kyle kicked his uninjured leg and rolled his eyes. Butters blushed and slid his hands under the blankets to warm them.
"How would that work? We all have the guy parts."
"I think it'd be a huge 69 ass-fucking party, kinda like the human centi-"
"STOP!" Kyle cried, eyes widening in horror, "that's fucking gross!" Kenny smiled sympathetically at Kyle and used his foot to pat his leg comfortingly.
"I had a dream like that..." Stan trailed off, smirking a little. Kenny leaned forward a little, and the black haired boy blushed. "A three-way, I mean. Not the human centipede shit..."
"Do tell!" Kenny chirped eagerly. Butters gave him a glance and felt a smile tug wider on his lips.
"Well it was like a year ago, a little before Kyle and I started dating but we had a thing going on. Well, I always thought you were hot, Kenny-"
"I know." He beamed at Stan's blush.
"Anyway," he gave Kyle's hand a squeeze. "Kyle and I were in his room fucking like rabbits and then you walked in." Kenny raised an eyebrows and gave a crooked grin. "Needless to say..."
"Please tell me you made a fucking Kenny sandwich."
"Pretty much, that was one of the hottest dreams I've ever had... sorry, Butters." Butters shrugged and blushed a little; he wasn't a jealous person. Everyone knew Kenny was hot.
"So's that why you always freaked out when I asked about going down on you in the locker room?" Kenny asked teasingly. Stan rolled his eyes, "what can I say? I have the hottest friends."
"You are such a slut," Butters restated in an amused tone as his hand trailed up Kenny's leg. Kenny's eyes locked on his and Butters smiled as he rubbed against his half-hard cock. Kyle and Stan laughed out loud at Butters' accusation and Kenny just smiled.
"But... do you think it'll always be like this? Us just hanging out, being this close?" Kyle asked, more seriously this time. Stan nodded and wrapped his arm around his boyfriend's shoulder.
"Of course," Kenny assured him gently, "I don't know what I'd do without you guys."
"We should all go to school together... get an apartment together." Stan offered, Kenny squirmed and put his hand over his mouth as Butters conspicuously undid his pants.
"Y-yeah..." Kenny breathed, smiling at his friends, "and I can get a job and take care of the apartment and cook while you guys are gone." Kyle furrowed his eyebrows at Kenny.
"You wouldn't have the time, you'd be in school too, dip shit." Kenny shrugged his shoulders, then shook his head.
"C'mon, you guys don't actually think I'll make it into a college. Wal-Mart and night-shifts as a janitor are calling my name." Stan sighed heavily and gave Kenny a sad look.
"I've seen your grades, and you have a chance at a full scholarship."
"Stan, don't give me that shit. We both know that I'm out for good and that football was my only chance at getting enough money to go to a decent college."
"If you get surgery-"
"Are you gonna pay for that? 'Cause I sure as hell can't. I'm dealing with this for life, man." Kenny pointed to his braced leg. Stan grimaced and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I told the scout I wasn't interested."
"What the fuck? Why?!" Kyle cried in outrage.
"Because of my fucking leg. It's a sucky situation but I'm not gonna let them pass up another opportunity waiting for me. I just like playing football, I like running around. I'm not serious about it, either. It's just fun for me. It fucking hurts, Kyle," Kenny mumbled, relaxing as Butters' hand moved up to massage his muscles reassuringly. Butters was upset to hear Kenny talking like this, but he had to imagine how he was feeling.
"It's not like they don't offer grants and student aid."
"I'm not taking loans I can't pay back, that's how my mom got into debt. She was gonna be a nurse but she got pregnant with Karen and her money was used to take care of us when I was real little. My dad saw her as their source of income and she'd just keep taking more and more money from the system so we could eat and have heat and shit. But she dropped out... and I'm not gonna do that. It's okay though, if I get a sweet deal then sure I'll go to college. But I'm not gonna be able to play again and I'm completely okay with that." Stan sighed and shook his head at Kenny, who turned his attention to the television. Kyle looked at his boyfriend and took his hand; there was no point in arguing.
"Where do you guys wanna go?" Butters asked, "I was looking at Boulder but there's this college in Washington I heard of that's real good." Kenny turned to Butters with surprise, and the bright blonde just smiled at him.
"Whitman?" Kyle asked, Butters nodded, "I looked into there, it's so fucking expensive though."
"This is killing my buzz," Stan grumbled, "where's that joint?" Kenny shrugged his shoulders and looked around. Butters held it between his fingers and Kenny lit the end once again as Butters took a hit then passed it to Stan.
Their attention focused on the screen, where the group of survivors decided to blend into the zombie hoard. Stan and Kyle were giggling and making comments to each other and Kenny was watching with a half-baked smile on his face.
He jerked as he felt Butters' hand slide his pants down passed his ass and wrap around his cock through the fabric of his boxers. Kenny bit his lip and kept his eyes on the television as he felt his hand snake into his underwear and slowly stroke his shaft with his thumb. He sent the blonde a look, who just smiled innocently, and nodded to the other couple; they were completely engrossed in the movie.
"Shh..." Kenny's entire body twitched and he felt his nerves and blood scream in overdrive. He laughed incredulously and leaned back a little as he watched the film. "Not a single sound," Kenny nodded and gripped onto the couch as Butters' hand gently squeezed his scrotum then worked its way back up to the tip, where he coated his head with the beads of pre-come.
Kenny heaved a sigh and felt his cheeks heat as Butters' movements became stronger. His eyes blurred out of focus and he closed his eyes and rested his forehead on his hand.
"You okay Kenny?" Kyle asked, he nodded and tried to focus on how to speak.
"Yeah... good..." His toes curled and his nails dug into the armrest of the couch as Butters pumped him discreetly. Kyle nodded and Kenny bit his lip hard as he turned back the movie.
Butters felt Kenny's slight movements. His legs squirmed and tightened slightly as he leaned his head back on Butters' shoulder. The boy in control shivered as Kenny's hand ran through his hair and his lust-blown blue eyes searched his own. He loved the pink in Kenny's cheeks and his half-high, half-pleasure induced smile as his eyes slowly closed and he bit down hard on his lip. Butters slowed down his strokes in attempts to stall Kenny's orgasm.
"Hey, do you like Nutella?" Butters asked, Stan and Kyle nodded.
"Wh-what the fuck is that?" Kenny asked.
"Fucking delicious," Stan answered, "now I want some. Do you have any?" Butters nodded and Stan ran upstairs.
"Did you know that... someone in our class, I can't say who, used it to give someone else a blowjob?" Kyle looked between the two on the couch and cringed.
"That'd be weird and make your dick sticky." Butters shrugged and held Kenny's rock hard member in his hand yet barely made a single movement. Kenny's eyes were desperate as Butters' fingers danced over his shaft lightly.
Stan returned moments later and tossed a jar at Butters, he had one for him and Kyle. Butters took Kenny's hand and dipped his middle finger into the chocolate spread. Kenny opened his mouth to try it but his eyes widened as Butters stuck his finger in his mouth and sucked hard on the skin until there was no trace of chocolate on Kenny's digit or in Butters' mouth. Butters circled his tongue around Kenny's fingers and stroked him firmly once; the boy came in hidden trembles and curling toes as Butters popped his mouth off of his finger. He pumped Kenny until he was completely flaccid in his hand and Butters conspicuously wiped his hand on his blanket.
"Good?" Butters asked as he handed a trembling Kenny the jar. He dipped his own finger into the chocolate-hazelnut spread and offered it to Kenny. He giggled as Kenny licked and sucked it all off, tasting himself on Butters' finger as well. Kenny nodded and smiled knowingly at Butters.
"Do you guys want a room or something?" Stan asked as Butters snuggled into Kenny. They both shook their heads and laughed quietly as they turned back to the movie.
"Wait... how did they get to the Winchester?" Kenny asked in confusion. Stan and Kyle shot him a look and Kenny looked down at the floor, cheeks still dark from Butters' ministrations.
The night passed with another movie and an hour of playing Just Dance 3. Kenny had eaten half of the pizza himself, no one had made a single comment, and by 3:30 in the morning they were crashed on the couches. Except Kenny.
His phone vibrated and he checked the message.
From: Karen
Received: 4:12 a.m.
Kenny are you at Butters? We need to talk. Im outside of his house.
Slowly and carefully, Kenny slid out of Butters' cuddling grip. The blonde mumbled and curled into the couch. Tip-toeing up the stairs, he managed to leave without making a single squeak on the floor. He ran through the living room silently and opened the door to find Karen standing in her homecoming dress, shivering. Ruby and Ike were with her as well.
"Shh... what the hell are you guys doing?" Kenny whispered, looking them over. They looked exhausted and cold.
"Dad's home." Karen said in a whisper, causing Kenny's blood to run cold. "We were hanging out in my room and he was just... there."
"He seemed really fucking pissed, so we left." Ruby added sadly, wrapping her arms around herself.
Karen and Kenny stared at each other as if silently communicating, and Kenny sighed heavily.
"Ruby... can... can Karen stay with you for the night? Did you talk to Kev?"
"He said what you said." Karen replied and Kenny nodded; Kevin would be able to calm Stuart down. He was the best at beating him to a pulp and making him second-guess his strength.
"Okay, so... you stay at Ruby's and I'll stay here, okay? Do you have any clothes with you?"
"She can borrow mine, it's okay." Ruby offered, Kenny smiled gratefully at the girl and hugged his sister tight. Ike watched curiously, unsure of what the big deal was, but said nothing.
"Thanks, Kar-bear... it's gonna be okay. Don't worry. I'll go home tomorrow and let you know what's going on."
"He'll-"
"Don't worry," he assured her, then kissed her forehead and gave her his orange parka to wear on the way to Ruby's house. "I love you," he whispered, "everything's gonna be fine."
"I love you too," she murmured, hugging him once more before closing the door behind her.
Kenny kicked the couch and collapsed on it as he tore at his hair. This couldn't be happening so soon; he thought his dad had changed. He thought things had been getting better; maybe since he had come back his old feelings returned. Kenny sighed heavily and sat up.
It was all his fault and there was nothing he could do. Their dad was angry at him because he couldn't keep his mouth shut; Kevin and Karen didn't deserve any backlash. He'd do whatever he could to protect them. He had been wrong. He had chosen to do something stupid... he should have known never to argue back. He could have avoided a lot of hurt if he had just taken the beating in the first place. He was wrong.
Kenny found himself staring in his reflection with the water running over his hands. He was shaking, his hands stung from the soap, and he felt dirty. He touched his angular face and felt his hollow cheeks. He was gaunt, there wasn't much fat on his body. His eyes were a water blue, the only way they looked when he was upset, and tinged red from the pot. As he examined his arms and stomach, bare from sleeping, he was almost a walking skeleton. He could see prominent bones in his body and he felt frail. Breakable. Unstable.
Kenny felt the familiar leap in his stomach and he barely made it to the toilet before he heaved the contents of his stomach into the bowl. His eyes watered and his body shook as he gagged and retched in attempts to rid his body of the horrible feelings burrowing in his blood and brain. His cheek rested against the porcelain bowl and he spit the vomit into the toilet as his stomach clenched and his throat burned with the bile that poured from his mouth.
"Kenny?" He wasn't able to turn around as he heaved once more, every one of his muscles contracting as he vomited painfully. He felt a hand sooth his back and pull his hair from his face as he gagged. "It's okay, just let it out..." Butters murmured, massaging his back gently as Kenny moaned in pain. He remained with his head down until his body stopped shaking and slowly he stood up. Butters handed him a toothbrush and Kenny quietly brushed the acrid taste out of his mouth. "What happened?"
"I think I ate too much." Kenny croaked, hugging Butters, "fuck, dude, my dad's back home." Butters pulled him away and looked into his eyes. "Karen came over... she's staying at Ruby's tonight. I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do. But it's all my fucking fault and Kevin has to deal with his bullshit."
"And that's why you got sick?" Kenny sighed heavily.
"I worked myself up..." he murmured quietly.
"Your hands?" Butters looked at the red skin and grimaced. "Sit on the toilet." He opened the medicine cabinet and grabbed out gauze and anti-biotic cream. "You're gonna keep these bandages on unless you shower or actually have to wash your hands. You're g-gonna get an infection if you keep doing that to yourself, your hands are swollen..." Kenny remained silent and let Butters rub in the ointment carefully. He winced as it stung slightly. "It's gonna hurt 'cause your skin is so raw." Butters carefully wrapped his hands, up to the last knuckle of his fingers, and kissed the back of his hand. "Whatever happens with your dad, it's gonna be okay. Because you're Kenny McCormick and I have faith in you."
"You're the first person to say that."
"Well it's true. And I'm gonna be here for you, always."
Kenny smiled sadly and wrapped his arms around Butters in a hug.
He could believe that for awhile.