Elena's POV

Damon and I spent the day talking about my self harm. He didn't want to leave me until he felt like I was going to be okay. I kept explaining to him that self harm doesn't mean I'm suicidal. He was still concerned about me hurting myself. I promised him that I'll call him the next time I feel like doing it. I don't know if I can keep that promise but I knew I was going to try. I had to get out of the house and I was still up to go out so I got changed. We went out to dinner once it got darker. I also didn't want John to come home and see him there.

"This place is so nice." I smiled over at him. He made me feel so giddy.

Damon sipped on his iced tea. "Yeah and the food is really good." He looked over at me. "You're so beautiful you know that?"

I blushed. "And you're sexy as hell." He chuckled.

I took a bite of my turkey club. The fries were heavenly. Damon got a burger. It was nice being here with him. It was one of those fancy diners with romantic lighting. There was lanterns hanging up on the ceiling of the entire diner. Today has felt so magical. Damon made me forget about my life when I'm with him. I felt like I was the luckiest girl in the world.

"I so don't want to be that girl that over analyzes everything but I'm kinda that girl." I babbled to Damon. "What are we? I haven't had relationships before and I'm new at this and I know we haven't known each other very long but today was intense."

Damon was smiling at my question. "What do you want us to be?" He didn't want to push me if I wasn't ready.

I took a deep breath. "I mean I would like to be your girlfriend if you'll have me." I was so nervous but excited.

"I would love nothing more than to have someone as great as you to be my girlfriend." He took my hand. It was sweaty but he didn't care.

"Really?" I was questioning if anything was real at this point because I felt like I was on cloud 9.

"Of course." He didn't hesitate.

"And I'm not going to be a burden?" I had to make sure he wasn't doing this just to be nice.

He shook his head. "Elena you will never be a burden to me. I promise you that."

We finished eating and he walked me home.

"And here we are!" Damon announced as we walked up to my house.

"I suppose we are." I faked a smile. I didn't want to be home but this night was really special and I didn't want to bring him down.

"I really enjoyed spending time with you today." He spoke softly.

"This day has been really great Damon. Thank you for everything." I smiled softly. "I know the things you'd have to deal with by dating me aren't easy to handle but it means the world to me that you didn't runaway." I nearly teared up. I was so touched by this amazing man's compassion.

He looked me in the eyes. "I really like you Elena. I've never felt the way I feel about you with anyone else before." I smiled. "I don't care that dating you wouldn't be easy to most guys but you're special and I'm not going to let the fact that you have problems change the way I feel about you." Damon caressed my face and pulled me into a kiss.

Dear dairy,

The past day has been a rollercoaster of emotions. John sexually assaulted me. If the fire in the kitchen didn't break out he would've raped me. The whole time he's been our guardian he's never done anything like that. He hurts me but he's never done that. I was terrified and I didn't know what to do. I had all this bottled up inside of me. I hurt myself so bad that I passed out. Damon found me and he was so kind about it. I didn't want to burden him but he told me I could never be a burden. I have been called a burden for years so for Damon to tell me I wasn't, meant everything to me. Almost everything in my life is terrible. I'm so afraid to be in my own home. I can't fight the urge to self harm. I'm not doing okay. John is a monster. I'm so afraid of what he'll do to me. Jeremy is constantly letting me down. The one thing I have, the one thing good in my life is Damon Salvatore. After everything I've been through it Damon was a breath of fresh air. He was the only one that listened to me. He's the only one that can really see me. I'm head over heels.

Damon's POV

I watched Elena walk into her house with the biggest smile on my face. She's so special and incredible. I felt so lucky to be with her. I know it's not going to be easy especially watching her struggle and having all this pain but I understand. She's worth it all. Elena made me forget about problems and trauma when I'm with her. She made me laugh and smile. I can't remember ever feeling this happy. I felt like I could open up to her about my past but I didn't want to overwhelm her when she's dealing with her own problems. It helps knowing when I do tell her that she will be there for me.

I got home and walked into the living room. I turned on the light. Stefan was sleeping on the couch. I kicked his leg to wake him up.

"Leave me alone." He said groggy.

"Wake up bud." I said tussing him a bag of leftovers from the dinner. Stefan sat right up and stuffed his face with cold fries. "Come on dude. Use a plate."

He rolled his eyes and got up. "Fine"

I followed him to the kitchen. "So where did Caroline go?" I noticed his mood changed from this morning and the perky blonde missing.

My brother put his food on the plate before putting it in the microwave. "She had a date." Stefan yawned.

"A date? I thought you were dating her?" I said confusingly. I grabbed two waters from the fridge.

Stephan grabbed his food and sat at the table. "We aren't exclusive. She can do what she wants." He sipped his water.

"Really and her sleeping with another guy doesn't bother you?" I asked him. I couldn't imagine it not bothering me.

"As long as I can sleep with her and other girls, I don't care at all." Stefan said as he ate his food.

I didn't buy a word he said. He cared I know he did. My brother was so happy this morning and it was so nice to see that. Caroline made him happy and I can tell this was hurting him. I just wanted to help him but this is the one thing I can't do for him. I can't get in the middle of his relationships.

I spent time with my brother and made sure he did his homework. I took a shower then laid on my bed after. As I laid there my mind traveled to that bad place in my head. I had images in my head from that night with my dad. I felt it hard to catch my breath and I felt dizzy. My chest tightened as I hyperventilated. I didn't see this panic attack coming. I tried to sooth myself but it wasn't working. I took out my phone and called Elena.

"Missing me already?" She giggled.

"Of course you're that irresistible." I felt instantly so much calmer.

"I feel the same way about you." She said.

"How are you doing?" I asked her as I needed to hear her voice.

"Better." Elena said.