A/N: I know this story is a bit slow paced but it does pick up soon.

I also wanted to thank everyone who has reviewed, fav'd or followed. It's a great motivator and I really appreciate it.

Chapter 4

(Vibe: Holland by Novo Amor )

Carol didn't have any time to stop herself from screaming out in shock.

She hadn't even fully opened her own eyes when she'd seen the dead eyes of a walker starring back at her.

Quickly she scrambled back on her hands and feet, preparing to fight.

It took her far to long to realize that the Walker wasn't moving. It took her too long to realize that the hand she'd thought was reaching for her, wasn't. It was stretched out towards her, but she assumed that was simply they way it landed on the ground.

And she wished she had have noticed all of this much sooner, rather then reacting how she did.

When she looked up she'd found Daryl holding the body of a walker, that he had been preparing to drag away.

At first she had seen shock in his expression, but that quickly faded. Right now, he just looked angry with himself. And that made her angry with herself.

He dropped the walker he had been readying to carry off and marched himself in her direction. And she held her breath and stayed still as he approached.

It was the first time that she'd seen him voluntarily enter her space, since her arrival a week ago. Only now did she know, that just because she hadn't seen Daryl come close to her, didn't mean that he hadn't. The walker lying dead on the ground a few feet from her was proof of that.

As he got closer to her, she could finally get a better look at him. The marks on his face, that she had assumed was only dirt, was also a mess of bruising.

From what she could tell, there were few spots left on Daryl that didn't show signs of healing bruises. In amongst those bruises, were cuts and scrapes, marks that showed where his skin had split on impact. It wasn't hard to guess how he had suffered those injuries, it was obvious that he had been beaten badly.

But what she couldn't make sense of were the stitches on his temple, on his arms and wrists, mirroring their positions and sizes on either side of his body. Those she couldn't explain away. She didn't know why they were there or what they had done to him.

His eyes didn't find her's as he reached down and snatched up the walker.
He still looked angry with himself, even after she quietly thanked him for keeping her safe through the night.

Sometimes she was sure that he would rather she just go.

But feeling as though Daryl didn't want her around, wasn't something she hadn't dealt with before.

That was exactly how she felt when she had first met him. But she'd soon figured out, that just because it felt like Daryl didn't want her around, didn't necessarily mean he wanted her to leave.

Daryl didn't pay her any attention as she moved her tent closer. Daryl couldn't seem to focus on anything right now but the demons that were fighting to pull him into the darkest places of his mind.

She guessed that few people would see the difference between the episodes that Daryl was enduring. But she could.

She had seen the different ways his face twisted, heard the different sounds he made and the different ways he held himself as he paced. Even the ways that Daryl took his steps were all depending on what he was feeling and experiencing in his head.

There had been days when she knew that she couldn't approach him, even if he allowed such a thing. She was sure that he would lash out, he would feel threatened and he would react to her without realizing who she was, or where he was.

But there were days, like right now, when she could almost feel him longing for some kind of comfort.

She could see that he was afraid, more afraid then she ever remembered seeing him.

She could hear him panting out a pained sound and see tears falling freely from his eyes.

But still she couldn't help him. She needed to keep on going with the slow pace she had set.

There was no way to approach him right now without scarring him and ruining all the progress she had made with him. He would see her as threat, as an invader. Rather then someone he was becoming comfortable with again. Whenever she did approached him, he needed to see it happening. He needed to to be fully aware and ready for the encounter. And right now that wasn't a possibility.

It was late in the afternoon when Daryl had finally come back to reality.

He had spent the last hour looking out over the water. He leaned his back into a tree, with his knees drawn up and his arms draping over them. He looked calm and tired. And approachable.

She often wondered if Daryl had more things to ground him, that he wouldn't slip away quite so easily. Maybe if his mind had something real to focus on, then he wouldn't get so caught up in whatever chaos was running wild in his head.

She was still ten yards away when his head swayed in her direction, locking his gaze on the ground at her feet.

He glared and his body visibly recoiled from her, but he made no attempt to run from her and he didn't work to ignore her approach. This was the progress she had made in the week since her arrival. And even though he was almost snarling at her her, she was grateful.

"I was wondering if you might be able to help me. I uh- I could use some help."

It was manipulative. She was being manipulative.

She knew he still felt bad about leaving the body by her while she was sleeping. He felt bad because he had scared her, even if she didn't think it was necessary for him to feel that way.

She knew that no matter what was going on with him, there was still a deep rooted desire in him to help her, she could see it in his eyes. Knowing that he felt like that, made her feel like she was exploiting those feelings. But she didn't have much else she could use to help her gain some more ground with him.

"I'm having trouble catching anything around here. My supplies, there running low."

She lied on both accounts. She hadn't attempted hunting or setting up snares. She didn't need to, because Rick had left her with more then enough supplies to keep her going.

Daryl's head lifted slightly and beyond his furrowed brow she could see his narrowed eyes meeting her's. He still looked angry and uncomfortable, but she could see curiosity and eagerness swimming in his eyes.

"Do you think that you might be able to hunt something down for me? So I can cook some dinner."

Daryl's eyes stayed on her's, starring at her hard, as though he was trying to figure out if this was some kind of trick. She just hoped he didn't figure out that it kind of was.

She held his gaze for as long as he held hers. She wanted him to know that she meant no harm, she just wanted his help. But she also missed him looking at her, she missed seeing those familiar blue eyes fixed on her. And she wondered for a moment if maybe the reason he held her gaze for so long, was because he missed her's to. But she knew that was just wishful thinking.

The rough and frustrated growl that Daryl released was enough to make her jump back a step and she was glad he didn't notice it.

He got to his feet and kept his head hanging low, as he stormed off into the woods. Leaving her to wonder if he was going to hunt, or if he was simply trying to get away from her.

She sat and waited, while slowly gathering what she needed to start dinner. It was almost two hours before he returned, swinging the corpse of the rabbit at his side like a rag doll.

He was quite obviously still annoyed, but she wasn't sure if those feelings were directed at her or himself. She guessed that maybe he was angry with himself for feeling compelled to help her.

She stopped what she was doing and smiled at him as he approached, but his irritated expression never faltered for a second at the sight of it.

He got close enough to toss the rabbit to her and not a step further. He ignored the thanks that she offered him as he turned and made his way back to the water. Obviously ready to continue on with what he had been doing before she interrupted him, as though it was calling out to him.

She worked fast to get everything in the pot and cooking. Doing what she needed to do to assure that the meal would be ready soon.

Daryl was settled back into the same spot as he had been, sitting himself in the same position, starring out at the water in silence.

There was a very good chance that she was pushing her luck and she didn't exactly know what to expect, but she had to do something. It seemed that if Daryl sat still for to long then he was more likely to slip into something, or that something was able to sink it's claws into him. She figured she had made enough progress to at least try and keep him grounded.

Once again his head turned in her direction as she got closer and once again he refused to look at her. She could still see that same discomfort in his posture and expression, but he didn't appear to have any intention of running away from her.

She was hoping he would respond better to her if he didn't feel pressured or she decided to keep it simple and to not appear to eager.

"Dinner will be ready soon. There's more then enough for both of us."

Daryl didn't move an inch or respond in anyway to the offer. He seemed focused on the ground and she wondered if he had even heard her, or if maybe he'd already started to get caught up in his own thoughts.

"You caught the rabbit, you should come and enjoy it. And I'd- …." she stopped herself and thought through what she wanted to say. Her sudden silence brought Daryl's eyes up to meet hers and it was all the encouragement she needed to continue.

"I'd like it if you joined me for dinner" she added watching as the question caused Daryl sights to drop back to the ground and a crease to form in his brow, while his hands began fidgeting with one another.

She nodded to herself, accepting that she couldn't do much more then that. She had asked him and he hadn't completely ignored her and he hadn't ran away. That was probably more then she could hope for.

As she stirred the pot and began getting the bowls and utensils out, she noticed his movement out of the corner of her.

She decided not to draw any attention to him. She kept her sights down on the task at hand, preparing him a spot on the other side of the fire, away from her.

She hoped that if he could see that there would be some distance between them, he might feel more inclined to come over and eat with her.

Daryl had always had his own ways of coping with things that he found to be foreign or uncomfortable, that was just as true now as it had always been.

And even if right now she was having trouble figuring out a ways to help him, she could at least recognize that Daryl was trying to work something out in his head. It was as though he was trying to figure out a way to fit her into this mess he was caught in. Because much like her, Daryl didn't like being alone and she doubted that had changed.

She took her times filling the bowls. She gave him time to consider what he was going to do and if it was possible for him to take the steps he needed to take.

Right now he stood awkwardly, only a few feet away. She could see how nervous he was at the thought of completing the simple task and she had no idea what he would decide on.

She considered telling him that he could take the food and go, she'd do just about anything to ease his anxiety. But she knew that in the long run, it wouldn't help him.

She placed a filled bowl and a bottle of water on the other side of the fire, where she had laid a blanket out for him to sit on. Then she quickly moved back to her side and settled in.

He took two steps, before he abruptly stopped himself. She could see his jaw tighten, as he used his hand to roughly rub at his arm. He began gnawing at his lower lip and looking around him, as though searching for signs of danger, before he forced himself to take a few more steps in her direction.

She looked up and softly smiled at him, hoping to help calm his nerves and he responded by taking the last few steps needed before sitting down across from her.

She did her best to pretend she wasn't watching him and that she wasn't internally jumping for joy.

He shoveled his food into his mouth with the spoon and she could see his eyes widen with each mouthful, before his face dropped back into the angered expression, that she was unfortunately growing used to.

She tried to figure out what would be needlessly pushing him into discomfort and what might benefit him. But she felt like today had been a good day and he had responded to her being a little pushy, so she decided to see if her luck would hold out.

She heard an unmistakable hum of approval from Daryl as he ate. It was a sound she had heard many times since she met him and it left her quietly hoping one day to hear it again, and that maybe he would follow it up with the crooked smile that she quietly adored.

"I used sage and rosemary. Your favorite" she pointed out, watching his eye flicker up at her, before darting back to his food.

She had actual fantasies of him just snapping back into the person he'd been before all of this. She missed him. She missed talking to him, she even just missed the comforting sound of his voice. Even when he was talking to someone else, even if she could only barely hear it coming from down the hall, in the house they once shared in Alexandria. It didn't matter. It always soothed and eased the tension in her body. It always helped her relax and feel safe.

"Do you want some more? There's plenty here" she offered when she noticed his bowl almost emptied.

The grunt that he offered her, was made without much thought. And though he didn't use any words, it was a loud and clear yes.

He kept his eyes down as he held out his bowl to her, then started absently pulling at the tip of his index finger, while she filled it back up for him.

He didn't look back up again until she was reaching over to him with his freshly filled bowl. And when he did look up, he met her eyes at looked into them for a long moment.

For a second his whole form relaxed and his face softened.

She knew in that moment that it wasn't hopeless, she could help Daryl. She could help him fight what ever war was going on inside of him.