As the first month of her marriage to Viscount approached, Kate was content with her achievements so far. She managed to gain the respect of Lord Bridgerton tenants, his family, and his staff, and now even the Ton praises her as a perfect Viscountess. Sure, it seems like she is playing a part all the time. Smiling in the correct manner and saying the right thing. Everything she learned to teach her sister is now helping her out. Every night she sleeps tirelessly but is still content because she managed to mould herself into the Lord Bridgerton's idea of a perfect Viscountess. The only thing that kept her up all night was his requirement for his Viscountess to provide him with an heir. Every night after she left her husband's room and returned to her own, she prayed to God to give her a child. A child that not only cemented her position in Lord Bridgerton and this family lives but gained her higher respect among the Ton who still whisper about her age behind her back. She wondered if this concerned her husband too, but no, he is too gentle and kind to let her age become an issue; after all, six and twenty is not that old. She can still give birth to a few children to satisfy her husband, but most importantly, those children are the ones who will love her unconditionally. After all, mothers and their children's love is the purest bond of all. She will never fear failing them, as she always felt with her mama, Edwina, and later Lord Bridgerton and his family. No, her children will love her for all she is, and she will love them with all her heart. A love that she lost when her Appa left her alone in this world. Kate stared at the night sky through her window and touched her belly as she prayed. "Please let me be with a child. Please send me someone who loves me for who I am." A teardrop fell from her eyes, and she fell asleep, still clutching her belly. The next time she woke up, the sun was shining through the window, but it was not that shine that woke her up. With a gasp, she sat straight; her eyes fearfully stared down, and it seemed her heart had cracked in two. How could she ever think anything good would ever happen in her life? How could she pray for any kind of happiness when pain and failure are her constant companions? Kate was so lost in her loathing that she did not notice Clara entering to help her prepare for the day. "Lady Bridgerton I have ready your... Oh my lady, your courses have started." It was then that Clara noticed her mistress's state, as she did not even acknowledge her presence, and she was shaking in tears while still staring at blood on her sheets. "My Lady, are you alright?" She tries again, but her mistress remains unresponsive. She reached out to shake her, but then... "No! Do not touch me!" "My Lady." "Leave Clara! Just leave me alone before my cursed life ruins you too." Her mistress broke down into tears as she clutched her knees and hid her sobbing face between them. Clara ran in haste to inform one person who could help their Viscountess. Violet was waiting for her family to join her for breakfast—well, not everyone, as Anthony left early to meet with his solicitor. "Mrs. Wilson asks the chef to bring chai when Kate arrives; she likes her tea fresh and warm." Before she could give further instructions, Clara, Kate's maid, entered the room and approached her with a worried look. "My Lady, you need to come with me now." Violet could hear the urgency in the maid's voice as she quickly stood up and followed the girl towards the Viscountess chambers. As soon as Violet entered the Viscountess room, she found her daughter-in-law wrecked in tears as she was rocking while murmuring something in a tearful voice. "You are a failure; you are a failure." She keeps repeating mindlessly over and over again. Violet then noticed bloodstains on the sheets as realisation dawned on her. "Clara, go bring rags for your mistress and clean gowns and sheets." Clara left with a worried look on her face as Violet gently approached her daughter. "Kate, my child." Her daughter-in-law finally lifted her face, and what Violet saw broke her heart, but not more so than what she said next. "I am so sorry." She cried. "I promise your son heir and now..." She burst into more tears, and Violet could not bear her pain anymore. "Kate, please do not cry. I did not conceive after the first month of my marriage, and these kinds of things happened in their own time. Please do not blame yourself for something that is out of your control." But her daughter-in-law was inconsolable as she cried harder. "You were young, but I am not. Do you think I do not know what they say about my age? Your son was looking for a debutante for this very reason, and he still married me with the kindness of his heart. I have failed him, I failed this family, I am a failure, and I will always be a failure no matter how hard I try." Violet tried to comfort her, but a movement caught her eye. Violet turned around, and to her surprise, she saw Eloise and Francesca both staring at Kate, and while Francesca's eyes were filled with sympathy, Eloise's eyes shone with anger as her face filled with disappointment.
Anthony arrived late after meeting with his solicitor. The meeting went late as he transferred funds for Edwina's dowry and Lady Mary's allowance. He was happy that his meeting was successful, and soon the necessary arrangements will be made. He was excited to share this with his wife, and hopefully they could celebrate this news in his chambers tonight. Hopefully tonight will be the night he will convince his wife to stay in his room. He held tightly to the bouquet of white lilies and purple tulips, hoping Kate would love these flowers. As soon as he entered the house, Anthony's smile dropped as he noticed eerier silence. He knew his brothers must be out, but still, he could not hear a single noise from his sisters or the bickering noise of Gregory and Hyacinth. Even Kate's menace dog Newton has not yet come to bark at him, something the dog loves to do whenever he arrives, Anthony saw a footman. John passes the hallway, and he quickly calls the guy. "John. Where is everyone? Why is everything so quiet?" He could see John hesitating to reply, but it was then that he noticed Francesca walking towards the sitting room, with Clara following her behind and carrying a tray of food. He quietly followed after his sister, and it was then that he heard the conversation as Francesca informed his worried-looking mother. "She refused to open the door, mama. I tried everything, but she is still crying and refusing to let us in." "Oh dear, this is not good. Clara, have you changed her clothes and sheets? "I did, My Lady." Clara replied, "But afterwards she dismissed me from her room and locked her door. Poor Newton is still outside, but she would not open her door." Anthony knew who they were talking about, and his fears were confirmed when Eloise started clapping loudly. "Well done, Mama! Well done! You and my dearest brother just showed me what marriage does to a confident woman." "Eloise." His mother sighed, but his sister was not in a listening mood. "Eloise what?! What explanation do you have to justify what happened to Kate after she shackled herself to my brother? The once-spirited, confident, and self-assured woman I met and admired all those months ago is gone! That woman upstairs is nothing like the woman we knew before she married your son. Now she is just a puppet to entertain the ton! To bring honour to the Bridgerton name, and that changed her so much that now something as natural as courses is enough to scare her because she feared she failed your son and our family because she is not with Anthony's heir yet." Anthony felt like his sister had just slapped him as his mother's eyes filled with tears. "Eloise, I do not know what went wrong with your brother's marriage, but what you witnessed was not supposed to happen like that." "No mother! You do not understand because you were lucky to have Edmund Bridgerton as your husband! Your marriage was an exception to this Ton's rule, but the marriage between Kate and Anthony is the best example of most marriages in this world are like."
Anthony watched as his sister threateningly stepped in front of their mother. "So Listen to this now! I will not now! I will never be part of something like that." Eloise stormed out but stopped when she saw her brother's stricken face. "Congratulations brother. You won. You managed to break that woman spirit who once dared to challenge you." "Eloise." He gasped, but his sister left, leaving him to face the consequences of his wishes.
Anthony walked towards his wife's chambers, and Newton's face perked up at the sight of him.
For the first time, the dog did not bark; rather, he wined and approached him as he nuzzled his feet.
Anthony crouched down and gently ran his hand on Newton's fur. "I know you are sad because she is sad, and trust me, together we will make her happy again."
Newton licked his fingers, and Anthony felt a truce being formed between them for Kate's sake.
With one last pat, both man and dog approached the door as Anthony gently knocked on it. "Kate? Darling, it's me, Anthony. Please open the door so Newton and I can come inside."
As if to make his appearance known, Newton started barking while his paws tried to open the door.
He waited a few minutes, and then he heard the door lock click open.
Anthony stared at Newton and then braced himself as he opened the door.
Newton rushed inside in a blink of an eye while Anthony took his time.
The curtains were closed, but still, a little glow was coming between the gasps.
His eyes searched into the semi-dark room, and at first he thought it was empty, but then his eyes narrowed on a corner wall as someone was curled in a ball hiding behind Newton.
Anthony crossed the distance and once again crouched down, where his wife was hiding her face behind her dog.
Settling down on the floor beside her in that dark corner, he braces himself as he reaches out to touch her shoulder.
She squirmed away as a weak voice reached his ears. "Please leave."
"Not before I am satisfied that you are going to be alright." He told her plainly as he shuffled closer and reached out to lift his wife's face.
His heart broke a million times when he saw the tear-stained face of his wife, her eyes filled with devastation, and her voice hoarse as she cried. "I am so sorry."
Anthony could not help himself as, in the next second, he pulled his wife into a comforting embrace.
Newton wined as he put his face on Kate's lap while she curled herself in his lap.
Anthony held her tightly in his embrace as he felt Kate's tears soak his shirt. "Why are you apologising, sweet girl?"
"When I." She sniffed and looked up to stare at him tearfully. "When I proposed that deal to you, I promised you your children, your heir. I assured you that me being an old spinster would not be a problem, but today that belief was shattered when I had my courses despite visiting your bed for the entire month of our marriage."
Her face fell as more tears started falling from her eyes. "I am so sorry, My Lord. I think this happened because of the stress my new role has put on me, but that is no justification. I am extremely sorry. Please give me one more chance. Please do not cast me aside because I failed you."
Anthony felt like the world's most wretched person in that moment as he heard his wife begging him for one chance as she apologised repeatedly for being a failure. The defeated look on her face and her fear of being cast aside felt like someone had shook his soul.
His father must be so disappointed in him because Eloise was right; his wishes about a perfect Viscountess have crushed his wife's spirit. This woman in front of him was nothing like the courageous, spirited Kate he saw that first time.
How could he bungle her up so badly that now she throws him at his mercy?
Anthony tried to blink back his tears as he quickly tried to comfort his wife. "Kate, please do not cry and stop apologising. This was not your fault; no one, especially me, blames you for what is natural for every woman on this earth."
Kate stared at him in confusion. "But my duty."
"To hell with your duty." He exclaimed passionately, making his wife startled.
"Pardon me, my lady. What I meant was that nothing in this world is more important than your wellbeing. Children are God's blessing, and I am sure one day, whether now or a year from now, we will have our first of many children, but to call yourself a failure, well, I will not allow my wife to think of her as anything but the best person she is."
His wife's eyes were filled with aww as he gently cupped her face and prepped kisses all over her lovely face. "You are the best daughter." Kiss. "Best sister." Kiss. "Best wife." Kiss. "Best Viscountess and Best Bridgerton, and soon one day you will be the best mother in the world."
"You really believed that." She asks in disbelief.
Anthony tried to smile as he confidently assured her. "I can bet my entire inheritance on that belief."
Before he knew it, his wife pulled him into her embrace and kissed him in gratitude. "Thank you! Thank you so much."
Anthony smiled as he kissed her sweetly, but then she started speaking, and each word broke his heart into pieces. "I promise I will try harder next time; I will not disappoint you ever again. I will never fail your faith in me."
And as she starts discussing different ways for them to have his heir, Anthony wonders how far Kate has gone to become his Viscountess, and he wonders, Will he ever find that woman again?"
One thing Anthony Bridgerton realised after this whole ordeal was that he is a wretched man.
A man who caused tremendous pain to a woman by forcing her to change everything that made her so special and so different when he first saw her.
These days, he barely recognises his wife, who has now dedicated herself to giving him his heir.
Anthony snorts as he remembers their first heated argument, "Cattle and breeding stock." That's what she said he wanted in his wife.
Ironically, he now feels like a stud whose wife only needs him for breeding. He never loathed the idea of sex; in fact, he used to enjoy the act tremendously, but now that act has become one of his greatest fears.
So this brings him to another fact that he found about himself, and that is that Anthony Bridgerton is a coward, a coward who was hiding from his wife in the Mondrich Club. It is the only place where he can drink away his shame and sorrow.
"Bridgerton." A slurred voice broke his self-loathing as Fife and his friends joined him at his table.
"What are you doing here? I thought you preferred whites over this club."
"No reason, just looking for someplace quiet." Anthony replied in a slurred voice, and this is the truth: he is tired of Bassett giving him worried looks, and his brothers are too busy with their lives to bother him here.
"Needing quite some time, huh? Are you already tired of your spinster wife?"
"FIFE!" He warned, but apparently he did not listen as he continued. "I still do not know what you saw in that prickly beast when we were all convinced you would win her diamond sister. Did you compromise her or just marry her as a challenge because we knew how much you enjoyed breaking that beast?"
Fife laughed, and Anthony decided to show him what breaking someone truly means. "You bastard!" He punched him straight in the pathetic long nose and found it satisfying when he heard a breaking noise.
"Don't you ever disrespect my wife again!" Anthony threatened as he delivered punch after punch to Fife's face, and everyone else was smart enough to stay away from his wrath.
Finally, he felt a few hands pulling him away, but Anthony was kicking Fife unconscious. "Let me go! Let me break this bastard's bones."
"Enough, Bridgerton; you have done enough."
Anthony finally realised his friends voice as Simon and Will dragged him away.
Benedict left his party with other arts students as his valet brought him a note from the Duke of Hastings.
Colin left his meeting in the middle with Jack Featherington when Penelope entered her cousin's study holding a note. "I am sorry to disturb you, but an urgent message came for Colin from the Duke of Hastings."
"Simon." Colin wonders as he grabs the note, and a frown appears on his face.
"Is everything all right?" His best friend inquires, feeling worried about the urgency of this message.
"Everything is fine. Pen, Lord Featherington, I am sorry, but I have to leave due to an emergency."
He did not give Jack time to respond, as he quickly bowed to his friend. "Goodnight Penelope."
Colin rushed outside and was surprised when he saw Benedict peering out from Hastings carriage.
Colin groans as he thinks about the last time something like this happened. "Who has died?"
They arrived at the Mondrich Club and were greeted by Will Mondrich. "Follow me, gentlemen; your brother-in-law is waiting for you."
Instead of taking them to the main entrance, Will instead took them towards his lodgings upstairs, and as soon as they entered, they realised what the emergency was.
Because in Simon's arms was a man crying—a man who had not shed a tear in so many years.
"Anthony!" Both brothers called him out, but their brother looked completely broken.
"It's my fault!' He cried like a child. "It's all my fault!"
"Simon, what is going on?" Benedict inquired worriedly as he saw his brother weeping in his friend's arms.
"I do not know, mate, but if Will and I had not stopped him, then he would have killed Fife."
"Fife?" Colin looked surprised. "But what happened? Why would he hurt Fife? He is his friend."
"Do not say that bastard name! I will kill him! I will call him at dawn for a duel for disrespecting my wife!"
Anthony, in his anger, tried to stand up, but he collapsed as Simon and his brothers caught him.
"Let me go! Let me kill him, or better yet, let me die! I failed Papa because I failed my wife. He must be so ashamed of me."
"Anthony! Why are you saying this?" Benedict asked, feeling alarmed as his brother kept loathing himself.
"I failed Kate Ben; I am a bad son and a bad husband. Eloise is right. I broke Kate's spirit! I changed the best woman I ever knew because I wanted my perfect Viscountess. I got everything from this marriage, and Kate lost everything about herself!"
The men stared at each other as Anthony Pour opened his heart. How did Kate and him make this deal? Kate made sacrifice after sacrifice for her family. She changed herself to please everyone in her life.
"The worst part is that I missed my old Kate! I married her so that we never fell in love, but I realised too late that I loved her from the very first moment she galloped straight into my life. I missed that, Kate! I love that, Kate! I want my old Kate back, the same Kate who was spirited and outspoken and who always challenged me."
Simon squeezed his friend's shoulder as he asked. "What do you want, Bridgerton?"
Anthony sniffed and stared at him, and Simon was taken back to their earlier days of friendship when his friend showed him the same vulnerability when he lost his father. "I want my Kate back."
He stared at Benedict and Colin as, for the very first time, their strong eldest brother asked them for their help. "Please help me bring my old Kate back."
Afterwards, Anthony slumped into a deep slumber while leaving all three men behind to ponder over this problem. "How can they help Anthony and Kate?"