"He was almost definitely our suspect," Sam grumbled, watching their guy walk off without a care in the world.
Actually, the poor man was probably more than a little bit scared of Sam but that was neither here nor there.
"We have no proof," Callen pointed out, completely unconcerned by the turn of events.
"Bet if we searched him, he'd have the documents on him," his partner said in an annoyed tone, still glaring at the guy's back.
Callen was sure that there were going to be scorch marks on the guy's jacket from the intensity of Sam's glare. He didn't deserve that so he decided to distract his partner. You know, for the good of civilians.
"We?" Callen asked in an amused tone. "You wouldn't even look at the guy properly. Didn't even look in the direction of his face. He thought there was something wrong with you."
"There's something wrong with him," Sam retorted in a peeved off tone as he forcibly grabbed the car keys.
"You can't judge someone for their life choices."
Sam just glared at his partner. Apparently, he most certainly could.
"Not every clown is suspicious, Sam," Callen said overly-patiently.
"Yes, they are! Look at what they do! They prey on the young and weak! How is that not suspicious?"
Callen couldn't help but squint at him in amusement.
"Prey on the young and weak? Really?"
Sam grumbled something unintelligible (but probably not flattering towards clowns) as he yanked the car door open.
"If you ask me-"
"I didn't."
Not letting that deter him, Callen continued, "I think you're projecting your own issues again."
"Issues? What issues?"
Callen waved at the building behind them.
"Your coulrophobia. You're projecting it."
"And you've been talking to Nate again," Sam retorted.
Callen, of course, ignored him and blithely pressed on, "Because you're scared of them you make them out to be the bad guy. Giving them characteristics, they don't necessarily have."
"I'll give you characteristics you don't have," Sam threatened.
"See? Now you're defensive and angry."
Sam tried a different tact, "You know, I think Nate would be very glad that you're actually listening to him."
"Had to happen at some point," Callen said with a shrug and a grin.
"Maybe the next step would be actually talking about your own issues."
That made Callen let out a self-deprecating laugh as they pulled away. As if that would ever happen. Not that Nate had given up quite yet. Hope springs eternal and all that. And Nate was the best at being hopeful. Or was just the most patient. He would probably have to be to deal with all of them.
The two of them drove in silence for a while, thinking about the case (mostly). Then Sam decided to interrupt it.
"I bet Nell will find that that... that thing is the mastermind behind all this."
"Still with the clown?"
"Yes! We had probable cause to search him!"
"No, he would have had a case if I did anything to him. The guy was very clear that if anything was removed from his person that he would be pressing charges for assault and theft and emotional distress. And he wouldn't be wrong."
Sam glared at him, again. Seriously, did Sam really want to be the person to explain to Hetty if they had done as he suggested? Because Callen sure didn't.
"How do we know it was even a guy? He was all done up and speaking in that stupid clown voice," Sam wondered.
"Seriously?"
That's what Sam was focusing on? The gender of the clown?
"Why can't they just talk normally?" Sam asked defensively. "Oh, I know. It's because he's a Criminal Mastermind!"
This was really getting out of hand.
"He squirts people in the face with water from a rubber flower for a living. That doesn't exactly scream 'Criminal Mastermind' to me."
"That's exactly what he wants you to think!"
"Because that's all he is."
Sam still didn't look convinced. What did Callen have to do to convince him otherwise? Why was he even trying to convince his partner that the clown was not up to anything suspicious?
"He was acting all weird," Sam said stubbornly.
"He was in character. There were a bunch of little kids there. You know, what we do when we're undercover?"
Sam muttered angrily to himself about the general evilness of clowns and what he would like to do to them.
Callen broke out a lollipop (the first of a new stash) and commented, "Pretty sure that also counts as assault."
"Don't care."
"And would get you arrested."
"Only if I get caught. Which, I won't."
Fantastic, it was no longer hypothetical. Time for Callen to be the responsible one, wouldn't Hetty be proud?
"No."
"Can we at least go back and you question the clown?"
"That would also get us arrested I'm pretty sure."
"But-"
"No. Let Nell check him first and then we'll question him. If he's even a suspect."
Which Callen highly doubted but he had to pacify his partner somehow.
"Fine."
Now that was a huff if he had ever heard one. Shaking his head, Callen looked out the window at the passing traffic and said almost absentmindedly, "Better safe than in jail accused of robbing a clown. "
"We wouldn't be robbing him!"
"And what do you call removing the documents from his possession?"
That sounded like robbing a clown to him.
"Seizing evidence," Sam said immediately, like he had actually given this some thought.
Callen was starting to think that Kensi wasn't the one with a weird partner. Sure, she probably had the weirdest but Sam was definitely toeing the line of insanity.
"For what exactly? Last time I checked we had to have a reason for seizing evidence."
The law was quite clear on that matter too.
"For being the mastermind behind this whole case."
He would not bang his head off the window, he wouldn't. It was a close call but he managed not to. He was the team lead; he couldn't be seen doing such things.
"Can you imagine what Hetty would say?"
Sam shuddered at the thought.
Callen thought for a second before adding, "Can you imagine what Deeks would say?"