A Whole New Universe (Of Problems)
Please Read and Review. I'd like to know what I'm doing right (to keep doing it), and what I'm I doing wrong (to correct it).
"Pilot? Are you seeing this?" Aeryn Sun, ex-Peacekeeper, spoke into her comm, keeping her eyes on the horrifying image on the sensors.
It was Earth, the birth planet of her life partner, John Chrichton. But just as Moya was entering orbit, a light like they never had seen before exploded over a place John called 'Japan'. The light coalesced, and something grew from the surface of the planet. Chrichton himself stood next to Aeryn, almost paralyzed by the image.
Moya's crew could only watch as what looked like a giant teenage girl raised her head over the planet, holding her hands apart, while a sickly tide of red light and crimson shadow covered the world, and a myriad of crosses made of light erupted at its wake.
A ball made of points of light grew and grew between the giant's hands. It was as if she had a swarm of fireflies in her hands. From their place, they couldn't see the giant's face. The apparition glowed with inner light, like a frozen moonbeam.
John, Aeryn and Rygel stood immobile, watching, unable to believe their eyes. Rygel mumbled something; maybe a prayer, maybe a curse. Pilot's voice drew them back from their horror. "I... I am seeing, Officer Sun. Moya is most distressed by this. She is... she is weeping." In the image of the holographic shell, Pilot's mouth hanged open wide in amazement.
Suddenly, responding to instincts honed by several years of living on the edge, John Chrichton's hand drew his gun in a lightning fast move, pointing at a fourth person on the bridge.
"And just WHO the Frell ARE YOU?" Chrichton wasn't in a good mood. To be honest, he tended to not to be in a good mood most of the time anyway, but the day had been particularly tiring, even before this Apocalypse. He spoke on his comm, "Pilot! We have an intruder!"
The voice of Pilot sounded far away, "I see her, John, but cannot find how she got into Moya!" The group could see Pilot's face bobbing and swaying, almost cropping itself out of the holoimage, a sure sign his four arms were busily manipulating his control console. "She just appeared from nothing. She's not even registering on several of Moya's senses!"
"How did you get in Moya? What do you want?" Rygel addressed the intruder, from his floating throne, more than a little alarmed. The intruder paid absolutely no attention to the diminutive Hynerian Dominar in exile.
The apparition looked at the crew/passengers/escaped convicts in Moya. Her pale skin, red eyes and blue hair enerved everybody, mostly because her face showed not a single iota of any emotion. Not even her body language gave any hint of her purpose.
With the discipline of a soldier, Aeryn Sun pointed her guns at the intruder. One at her belly, the other right between her scarlet eyes. The girl simply stood there, unafraid of the three weapons pointing at her.
The strange girl looked from one to the other, until her eyes fixed on John, staring at him as if looking into his very soul. She tilted her head, studying him, and seemed to glow from inside. Except for her unusual pigmentation and thin adolescent body, she looked like a sebacean teenaged female, completely naked. Her arms hanged limply at her sides.
While Aeryn covered the intruder, John's hard look softened; with a quizzical look, he lowered his own weapon. "Aeryn, honey? Lower your gun, please." He whispered, his rough voice strangely mellow; he kept his eyes on the intruder, while making downwards movements towards Aeryn with his free hand, palm down.
The intruder walked one step closer to Chrichton. The exiled Earthling's brow furrowed.
Reluctantly, seeing that the intruder had not made any sudden or threatening moves, Aeryn obeyed and lowered her guns.
Slowly, John got closer to the strange girl. She extended a hand towards him, John mimicked the gesture.
Just as their hands were about to touch, Aeryn heard John mutter a single word.
"Mom?"
As their fingers made contact, John Chrichton ceased to be. Several gallons of orange liquid fell on Moya's floor. His clothes fell heavily on the floor. His gun clattered against the metallic deck.
The strange girl's scarlet eyes fell on Aeryn, "You are not a true daughter of Lilith. Your soul is not accepted into the Human Instrumentality. You are free to go."
Aeryn reacted in horror, her fingers squeezed the triggers of her weapons as she screamed in rage and loss. Still, her shots were now aimed to disable, not to kill.
The energy shots impacted against the apparition, making no noticeable damage. The shots simply passed through her body, impacting the bulkheads behind her.
The girl disappeared.
The only proof of her visit was a puddle of orange liquid, slowly spreading on the floor.
Aeryn knelt, picked up John's leather vest, holding it up against her chest for a moment. Her eyes shone wetly. Suddenly, her face set on a determined gesture, her lips thin and bloodless.
She picked up John's beloved gun, Winona, he had named it, for reasons only he understood.
"Pilot!" She yelled on her comm. There was no answer. "PILOT!" She repeated.
"I... am sorry, Officer Sun. It was the surprise."
"I want you to analyse everything that happened here in the last fifteen hundred microts. I want you to go over everything, understood? Energy traces, pheromone emissions, voice signature. Every single thing you can think of that could be useful. Then it will be my turn. Then we compare notes! I want to know who she was, where did she come from, what she did to John, and where did she go. But more important, I want to know how to undo it! Got it?"
"Understood, Officer Sun. I'll do my best. I'll send the DRDs to your position immediately."
Tense as a bowstring, she ran to the supplies room, soon, she returned to the bridge holding a metallic box. With Rygel's somewhat reluctant help, she gathered all the orange goo she could, along with John's clothes, soaking wet with the strange, blood-smelling liquid, and sealed it all in the box.
Only then she allowed herself a choked sob.
At that moment, Ka D'Argo and Chiana entered the bridge, their hair looking as if they had been running during a storm.
"What did we miss? Did we arrive to Urth already?" a smiling Ka D'Argo asked, holding Chiana's shoulders with his right arm.
When they saw Aeryn's face, their smiles were wiped from their faces.
"My name is John Chrichton.
Astronaut
Three years ago I got shot through a wormhole
To a distant part of the Universe
Aboard a ship, a living ship of escaped prisoners
I made friends
I made enemies
Powerful enemies, dangerous enemies
All I wanted was to find a way back home, to warn Earth
Look upwards and share the wonders I have seen.
But Earth is dead. Everybody is gone, except for the few traumatized survivors.
There is nothing left for us here.
Our destiny is among the stars."
Chapter 1
...There Goes the (Solar) Neighbourhood...
The sunlight hit harshly on John Chrichton's eyes. He blinked several times. He winced and rubbed his eyes. "Maaaan... DK really knows how to throw a party...", he mumbled.
He rolled on his bed, and promptly fell down. Once on the floor, he grabbed for the edge of the bed and pulled himself up.
Once he checked he was more or less stable on his feet, he poured a glass of water and drank it in a couple of gulps, followed by another. 'Hydration... I need to re-hydrate.' He poured a third glass, dropping a couple of efervescent aspirins in it for good measure, he waited until they finished bubbling away, and drank his third glass of water in five minutes.
Soon he felt good enough to go to the bathroom.
"...ooohh..." He grabbed the sink for a moment, and then he looked at himself on the mirror. He looked like a zombie half-revived. The alarm clock chose that moment to ring. Chrichton grabbed his head, ran/stumbled to the night table, and pushed the button to shut the contraption up.
Just as he sighed in relief, his cellphone rang. He answered the call, and lay down on his bed once again. "Hello?" He sat immediately. "Mom? Yeah... Yeah, I'm awake; more or less... No, I haven't forgotten, I will pick you up in..." he looked at his watch "...four hours. Yes, I have your flight number; I will be there with Dad. See you. I love you. Bye." He hanged up. For a moment, his eyes lost focus.
He felt that something was terribly wrong. He shook his head and went back to the bathroom. He needed to shower and eat something. And wake up, that was important.
Wake up.
In a perfect world, a man hugged his wife. They had had an awful quarrel just the day before, she had practically bitten his head off, but they had reconciled after a heartfelt apology on his part.
"Zhaan, come to the bridge, right now."
"Sorry, Aeryn. I can't go now." The delvian priestess answered, stress clearly noticeable in her voice. Aeryn heard a coarse scream in the background.
"What's going on, Zhaan?" Aeryn furrowed her brow. She had recognized the source of the scream.
"Stark is having some kind of stroke. I have my hands full now trying to calm him!"
"TOO MUCH! TOO MANY! THE BLACK SPHERE IS FULL! STANDING PLACE ONLY! EVERYBODY IS HERE FOR THE PARTY! EVERYBODY IS HAPPY! OH, THEY ARE SOOOOOO DAMNABLY HAPPY! SO DAMNEDLY HAPPY THEY ARE! THEY ARE TRAPPED AND THEY! DON'T! KNOW! IT! PLEAAAAASE! SOMEBODY MAKE IT STOOOOOOP!"
Aeryn looked around, "D'Argo. Go help Zhaan. Take care of Stark and bring her back as soon as you can."
"Sure.", the sobered Luxan grumbled, and ran out the bridge, licking his lips.
"Hrumph... As if we didn't have enough problems, that fool had to go and jump over the engine. What a load of dren..." Rygel mumbled.
Chiana dope slapped him. "Shut up, Rygel; if you are not helping just keep quiet."
"Yeah, sure, just as you two do. I haven't slept well in an eight-of-a-cycle."
"And aren't you you devoured by envy? Hmm?" Chiana put her hands on her hips.
"Be quiet, you two." Aeryn snapped at them.
Chiana held up her hands in a conciliatory gesture. "Sorry, Aeryn. Just what got your uniform all twisted up?"
"See that box? A weird spectral girl turned Chrichton into orange goo and left. All I could gather of John is in that box. I'm this close to scream my head off until my throat is raw and bleeding, so you'll both have to excuse my temper."
"Wait, what?"
"John, strange girl, orange goo, that box." Aeryn nodded her head towards the box. "Now, be quiet you two, I need to think. I don' want to go into this half-cooked, as John would say."
"Um... I think its half-cocked..."
"Whatever. Now shut up."
Author Notes
I've had the idea for this crossover for a long time, but hadn't found the right angle to start.
Originally, my idea was to do a wacky, Farscape-style comedy scene; but that just wouldn't work until, and unless, the Evangelion characters were already integrated into the Farscape world. That scene might eventually be written and published as an Omake. I'll probably just modify my original idea.
In the meanwhile, I want to use the classic Moya crew for the story, meaning Chrichton, Aeryn, Rygel, Ka D'Argo, Chiana, and Zhaan.
Stark is not at his best at this moment, for reasons that are obvious to any Evangelion fan. If you are not fluent in EVA lore, don' worry, it all be explained soon.
John's monologue is a modified version of the intro monologue from season three.