Matt stared at the threatening looking devices attached to the hulls of the other spaceships with worriment. "What am I going to do, Quana? They'll find me for sure!"
"Uh..." Quana pushed a button on the computer, coughing dramatically as she jabbered something to the other ships in Wava.
The strange voice growled something back.
Quana let out a triumphant shout. "They fell for it!"
"What did you just do?"
"I told them we got attacked by a dangerous chemical weapon. We're to follow them to Pathilon and enter decontamination."
Matt swallowed. "Do you have a disguise for me or something?"
"I'm sorry. I never planned to have a human on board. We'll have to make do with what we can find."
"Make do! That doesn't sound good!"
"I admit it won't be great, but I can probably find something that works...Let's see...I'll just put a long uniform on you, and say you lost your tail in an accident. They kept some Iznolgu suits in storage."
"Um, is my not having a tail going to be a problem?"
"Guep kai yok, but I can fix it. You shouldn't have too much trouble fitting in. Aside from our fur and tails, we basically look like you."
"There are other differences."
"Yes, but they're not glaringly obvious. They can be concealed. I don't suggest you talking too much, though. Your human accent might give you away."
She scanned his measurements with a small laser device, then handed him a flat translucent bag. "Here. This will fit you. Oh, and you have a mild form of diabetes."
"You're making that up! I don't even take insulin!"
"Think what you want, but it says you have one of the less serious cases. Your sugars look okay right now, but..."
Matt frowned. "Whatever."
The bag contained ornately patterned white tunic with a spreading leaf-like collar, and a pair of leathery black pants. Matt scowled. "Um, Quana?" He wiggled his finger through the tail hole.
"Yes, of course. Not to worry." She pressed a small rod shaped device to the material, and the hole vanished.
"I wish my mom would have had one of those when I was little."
"Quick. Put it on." Quana stared at him expectantly.
Matt blushed. "Do you mind stepping out a minute?"
"Hurry," she sighed, stepping out. "We're going to be in trouble if you don't."
When he called her back in, Quana, frowning, held a fur coat up to his body. "I really wanted to keep this as a souvenir, but..." She cut the coat with a laser. "This will be hot, but it will keep them from being overly suspicious." She slung the fur around his neck, closing the material around him with the `mender'.
Matt stared at the material inside his sleeves. "Wow. This is real fur."
"Yeah. That's why it's a shame to tear it up."
"Now how will I ever get this off?"
"I don't think you'll want it off very much, or they'll notice what's wrong." Quana tore off more strips, sealing them around his arms, tucking the fur inside his uniform. "There. Now you look like a tailless Abreya." She handed him a pair of slipper shoes with black stripes and thumb shaped protrusions on the sides. "Here. Put these on. Aliens don't wear ProWings."
Matt slipped on the shoes, trying to make his feet comfortable. His big toes didn't fit in the thumbs, so he had to awkwardly squish them into index finger holes.
"The real problem will be explaining what you are doing onboard in the first place." Quana paused a minute. "Let's see...You're my boyfriend from Boomosi...and you sneaked onboard the ship while I was escaping..."
"I like that. Boomosi, you say?"
"Yes. They're a backwards place. They talk funny...Back story: You lost your tail...in a horrible childhood accident. You were working with a...you were making furniture and you accidentally sawed it off."
"I don't know how to make furniture."
"Whatever. So it was your dad's furniture shop. You were playing too close to a Hirejosi machine, and the lerilite sliced off your tail at the base of your spine."
"...If you say so. Am I supposed to tell everyone that?"
"Guep." She explained how to say it in Wava.
"There's the linguistic thing. How will I explain that? I mean, you said I had an accent. I'm not sure being `backwards' is going to help. I can't just play a deaf mute all the time. I mean, you were going to show people all the stuff you recorded from Earth."
Her face changed color. "Oops."
"They already know about Earth, don't they?"
Quana scowled. "Some do."
"Then the alibi won't help."
"It's better than nothing. Besides, you look like an Abreya. Let's just hope it works."
They returned to their seats.
The male voice from the other ship barked something.
"What did they say?"
"They're going to hitch to my ship and take me to the palace."
Something clanked loudly. The entire ship shook. "What was that?"
"The hitch." Quana pushed buttons on the computer, letting go of the controls.
Matt looked up. A ship had attached itself to the roof by means of a fat metal disk. "I guess we're here, then."
A swirling green-white planet appeared on the view screen, looming larger and larger, until he saw nothing but a mass of emerald and purple.
"Where are the oceans?"
Quana pointed to a large blob of purple.
"That's water? Why isn't it blue?"
"It's the coloration of the plants and clay on the bottom. Water on your planet is actually clear. You are aware of that, aren't you?"
"So it has something to do with reflected light."
Matt watched their descent through the planet's cloudy sky with speechless wonderment, the purple-green blotches gaining definition as the world opened up below them.
They flew lower, zooming over the tops of tall trees with a vague resemblance to palms and oaks, pods of something like corn hanging from some, others bearing eye stalks, tongues or fangs. As they flew closer, bits of pink, red, lavender and the whole spectrum of the rainbow flashed from the ever present off-green foliage.
"Ahdep!" A deep female voice shouted from hidden speakers. "Toib bisa layd!"
The giant image of an obese Abreya female suddenly filled up most the screen.
Wide, broad shoulders, massive chest, and arms with muscles comparable to that of a bodybuilder, draped in gold jewelry and a sleeveless blue dress patterned with stylized eyes and leaves. Black fur glistened on her exposed arms, reminding Matt of a Kodiak bear, matching the tightly tucked bun of shiny hair pinned back on her head.
The woman's wild green eyes bore down upon him with a glare of contempt, heavy jowls grinding an overbite severe as a bulldog's.
"Who's that?"
"It's my mom!" Quana hissed. "Shh!"
Goodness! Quana certainly doesn't take after her. I wonder what `daddy' looks like.
"Quana tuc, hua bya mese borpaga," the woman growled. "Hua yigazo'h guom chik xocih or ha kreah dutio'h gosa chik."
Quana sighed, bowing her head. "Kigo, rimabe. Hua xocih gosa gefmoo sejucore."
The woman leaned forward, eyes boring straight down upon Matt with a look of contempt. "Bisa con chik?"
"Ge'l qiol najufe"
The woman put her hands on her hips. "Guki'ua ucuk con chik aaberahu?"
Quana gave Matt a nervous glance. "Mom wants you to leave the room for a few minutes. Just...go watch TV in the Gojot room or something."
Shrugging, Matt walked to the center room, stretching out on the couch.
He ended up waiting a long time.
"Supica. Minahujo pimopek cacurei." Although not great at Wava, he knew how to control the monitors from repetition.
All the screens in the room multiplexed, displaying a view from without the ship. He rolled over on his stomach, chin resting on the armrest, staring at the trees.
Struck by how unreal everything seemed, he stood up on the couch, pretending to surf the sky.
"Cowabunga!" Quana laughed. "What are you doing, trying to catch the big wave?"
Startled, Matt fell backwards onto the cushions.
Quana giggled.
Matt sat up. "So what did you and mom, I mean, your mother, talk about?"
She sighed. "I'm going to be married to Nabal, the prince of Kadegni."
Matt's stomach sank. "Do you...like this guy?"
"Yok. He's a complete hedonist with no respect for Ponai. But this wedding is supposed to bring peace and improve the economy."
"The bible says not to get yoked together with unbelievers and that you don't know if you'll save your partner by marrying them."
She stepped towards the sofa facing him, gazing into his eyes. "I remember reading that, but the decision is out of my hands. My parents arranged it."
"Well, I mean, it's not the end of the world, and depending on what happens, you got a captive audience, right?"
"Yeah," she groaned. "But it's not going to make it easy to get the answers I need."
"Did you tell them how you felt about it?"
"Numerous times." She sniffed. "But it was no use."
Quana dropped down beside him, clutching his body as she wept on his chest.
After a long cry, she lifted her head at level with his, like she intended to kiss him on the lips.
She backed away, staring at the floor. "Remabe bya zaib."
Matt actually understood that. It seemed he had picked up more Wava in their studies than he realized. "And what was she right about? Hopefully not the wedding, right?"
"Aaaugh!" Quana punched him lightly on the shoulder.
"So what was it? What was she right about?"
She blushed and kept staring at the floor. "Nothing. I...wish my parents would set me up with someone that's less of a jerk. If only I could get out of this marriage..." She fidgeted with her tail. "Without doing something I'll regret."
"Do you have...convents on your planet?"
Her eyes widened, a smile spreading across her cheeks. "That's perfect!" She kissed him on the forehead. "We could both join the Takofuea! The males and females stay in separate dwellings, so we can both stay out of trouble. Brilliant!"
"Both? Is the Takofuea for both men and women?"
She nodded.
"Do I have to take a vow of celibacy?"
"Would it be a problem if you did?"
Matt frowned. "I guess. My life wouldn't be that much different."
"It's settled then. I'll tell mother as soon as we arrive."
The ship zoomed over vast emergent tree layers, their diamond shaped leaves glistening like stained glass under a lavender sky.
Their craft passed over miles of greenery, and shiny white spheroids emerged above the crowns of the trees, growing larger as they flew along.
Soon they arrived at a vast complex hundreds of miles in size, elevated by impossibly thin support beams, trees taller than skyscrapers framing it on all sides. Its center held an object like a jewel encrusted egg, as large as a mountain, and all around it, connected by tubes and beams, lay scores of smaller spheroids resembling elaborate Christmas tree ornaments on giant saucers.
Quana sighed deeply, looking bored.
"Where are we going?"
"To the Pulotage, where all the ships dock."
The ship flew near a spheroid on the left side of the complex, and details on the structure came into view, tiny windows, doors, tubes, platforms, balconies, and walkways, with crowds of Abreyas walking around it.
The ship soared over a football stadium sized saucer platform, and Matt could make out details, Abreyas, male and female, clad in dresses of various styles and patterns, all busily in transit to their various destinations. Here and there, bug-like robots followed them around. Every minute, their crafts came down and took off like planes at an airport, some looking like cigars or trackless monorail cars, others like clownfish or octupii. Robotic squid things hovered between them. Crafts with the shape of bugs, flat disks, four winged jet planes, snails and crabs darted about. Wind blew through the fur of Abreyas seated on flying jet skis.
Quana blew a raspberry.
The Pulotage had the shape of a beehive, its saucer level surrounded all about by giant teethy humanoid mouths which opened and closed to allow the passage of spaceships. Above these mouths, huge cyclopean eyes glared down at them, then bays of windows, more mouths, then, at the very top, a glass dome.
Matt cringed as their ship flew closer to an open maw. "That thing isn't going to eat us, is it?"
"Why?" Quana giggled. "Is that a problem?"
"Well yeah!"
"I dunno, Matt! I think you're just going to have to sprinkle ketchup on yourself and let it happen! Chomp chomp chomp!"
"That's not funny!"
"Don't worry, Wusu. It's safe."
They passed through the mouth, and a short tunnel banded with rings of tube lights, the tunnel echoing with throbbing, pulsating sounds as continued on.
The room beyond had walls like a honeycomb, composed of small hexagonal bricks, divided at various levels by windows, balconies, arcades, rows of windows, plant boxes, flags and colorful streamers. The sun, in its purple sky, shined through the dome above, floating lights illuminating areas it didn't touch. Spaceships parked in vending machine-like compartments on giant shelves which slowly rotated around massive posts, elevators and flying machines bringing oddly dressed Abreyas up and down from these shelves as they went about their business.
Matt pointed to a male in blue ruffles. "Is he wearing a dress?"
Quana shook her head. "It's a Wighesh."
The ship floated down between two towering abstract sculptures to a copper teardrop shaped gate.
A green light on a nearby panel flashed red, and the gate opened, letting them into a plain copper - gray egg shaped room.
The male voice cut through the ship's speakers, ordering them to land.
"Just a minute." Quana left for the cockpit.
Sprawled on the couch, Matt idly gazed at the bottom of the other ship. Below him, blue creatures with tentacle heads dodged the ship and strutted about on the pavement, cooing like hamsters.
The ship settled on the ground.
Quana returned to the chamber. "We're here."
Matt sat up, allowing her to join him on the couch. "Do they still think we've got a biohazard on board?"
"Yok. I explained the situation to mom already."
"Did you explain me?"
"Only what needed explaining. I told your cover story, explained your accident, said you were sensitive about people talking about your tail."
"That's a relief."
A set of double doors opened at the end of the chamber, and a group of Abreyas in shiny black togas marched out in military formation, each carrying small boxlike weapons. The bird things flapped their wings and appeared to vanish into thin air at the soldiers approach, reappearing some distance away, where they took turns flopping on the ground and pecking at the concrete with their tentacles.
A fat figure in a blue dress and a crown burst through the doors and stomped up to the ship, banging on the hatch. When no one opened up, something made beeping noises and a loud hiss as the entry hatch opened on its own.
Matt's ears picked up the sound of heavy shoes thundering up the ramp, then he saw her, the Big Kahuna.
Matt had never seen a larger woman in his life. She stood at a height of about seven feet, with a heavy set, enormous chest, and a gigantic stomach. Her brawny arms and legs, once impressive on the monitor, looked twice as intimidating in real life. Her thick muscular tail curled behind her like a fat python about to strike.
I bet she could hatch a dinosaur egg. Matt would have laughed at the thought, but the woman's size and her cold hard countenance sent chills down his spine. She could probably crack my head like an egg if she wanted to.
Matt smirked. The female's crown had an unusual design, like a laurel wreath with jeweled eyes and pointy sculptured squirrel ears.
Without a word, the woman wrapped a meaty hand around Quana's tail, yanking her off the sofa. Then, before Matt could run away, a vice-like hand clamped down on his ear, and he got dragged along with her.
Hollering in pain, Matt stumbled after the alien, out the entry hatch, down the ramp.
"Hey! Helga!" Matt cried as he staggered into the garage. "Let go!"
"Matt!" Quana hissed. "Shut up!"
The woman ignored them both.
Matt, only thinking about his smarting ear, blurted, "Ow! Stop! You're crazy! Let go of me, you fat Hawaiian freak!"
Quana laughed out loud, causing the woman to pull his ear harder.
"Aaaaugh! Stop!" Matt winced as she forcefully dragged him through the column of togas.
About halfway through the line, the woman lost her grip on Matt's ear, so he jerked away, stepping back.
Before he could run away, a hand flew around the back of his neck, gripping it like a broom handle. He considered raising his shoulders and stepping behind the woman to do some semblance of an escape attack, but he doubted there were any sensitive areas to strike, even if it were a good idea.
Fingers pinched the fake fur around his neck. The woman's brow furrowed, but she said nothing, shoving him ahead.
She kicked open a door, and Matt got shoved into a long black hall lined with red carpeting and rows of gold doors.
The woman let go of Quana's tail as she typed in a code on a door panel. Before the daughter could make a move, the woman's python-like tail coiled around her, preventing an escape.
Both Matt and Quana got shoved inside an elevator. Only when the door slid shut did the female release them from her iron grip.
Rubbing his smarting ear, Matt stared about the barrel shaped compartment he'd been thrust inside, watching with fascination as Quana's mother cranked a steering wheel-like device on the right wall counterclockwise five times, the machinery making hums and low clicking sounds.
"Kee, chibya hei gefmoo sejucore lifahu rukhag," the woman said to Quana. "Viravo chik clozarilih bea Beurbak artane jub yiknoli chik. Mese jegfoj."
Quana said something in reply, and the two got into an argument. The two spoke more rapidly than furious Spanish speakers, and their conversation made no more sense to Matt's untrained ear. He could pick out words like `you,' `he,' `she,' and `it,' but didn't have the Wava vocabulary to understand complete thoughts. I should have brought the dictionary, he thought.
More rapid fire jabbering. Booga booga booga, Matt thought, creeping toward a wall. He tried to distance himself in the small space, but kept finding himself closer to Quana's mother than he ever wanted to be.
Matt stared at the flower print fabric draped across her muscular back, coughing as he inhaled a perfume smelling of Thera-Flu, boiled cabbage and Lysol. I wonder where I can buy that a bottle of that stuff. It could probably drive away wild animals.
He stared at the abstract designs on the elevator door as the sounds of alien conversation entered his ears as meaningless noise.
Quana seemed to be upset now, on the verge of shouting at her mother.
Matt frowned. Oh great. Now what's wrong?
The queen crossed her arms, shooting her a cold look. "Guep? Kreah bebak fepahoi gacih hua?
"Ceo jagopune nuqida kai pisoqibu bricajbei!"
The mother sighed. "Ruhd scrumsaarg con Nabal dutibitu jiaz gik dacedih." She bared her teeth and breathed through them, making her bulldog-like appearance even more pronounced.
Matt stared at the shiny black eye above the door for the fifth time since he'd been pushed in, puzzling why he'd been dragged into this family squabble. I suppose it's better than being thrown out of the building.
Matt suddenly noticed the woman looming over him, her olive green eyes locking onto his with an expression of suspicion. "Kreah siruka con chik quayhox?"
"Are you talking to me?"
His response caused a look of bafflement.
Right. Wava brain, activate now. "Umm...Kreah?"
The woman sighed. "Hua pebo'h, kreah siruka con chik quayhox?"
Quana tapped her on the shoulder. "Reem, chik yiucuk Wava."
Matt, understanding at least that part, folded his hands and gave her a formal Asian bow. "Ahhsoo."
The queen slapped him.
"Don't do that again!" Quana hissed.
"De guom chiknoli jocabai brinarun?" The queen returned her attention to Quana. "Parehe, eidarabua ge'l yigiwi riko subecosu rofi gik ucukteb gurabo ge'l, zoor ge'l ticoh cagote gurabuv."
Thinking that the heat had passed him, Matt breathed a sigh of relief, leaning on a rail.
A second later, the fake Abreya fur around his neck got yanked back, exposing the hairless flesh beneath.
"Quana, tuc, yunk ge'l batua huqea quayhox?"
"Aaaugh!"
"Reem!" Quana shouted. "Ge'l gac qecajeda patuihi! Ge'l jagopune."
For a few long uncomfortable moments, Matt endured the female's staring with the fake pelt dangling uselessly from his neck. Matt gave her a nervous smile.
The woman's eyebrows lowered, then, at long last, she turned her back to him. "Ge'l pihile ticoh yiqoeloqe coz Nabal. Bea scrumsaarg giwi dutibitu jiaz dacedih."
Mother and daughter resumed their argument.
Sighing, Matt tucked the fake fur back in, staring at the scales running down the length of the woman's tail. He wished the doors would open back up so he could at least walk around while the two argued, but it didn't happen.
Quana clenched her little tail in her fist. "Parehua yiglaap puguqe moqo ruhd soisofu."
The princess's tone had been cold, the words sharp, leaving an awkward silence. Matt stared at her, trying to figure out what had just been said.
"Chiyi legparf shnarf," said Quana's mother.
"Guep. Legparfua. Hua yigiwil tarru lorejiba con ruhd devibo coz kalaja briqasolire. Ruhd scrumsaarg ticoh ip huqea."
Matt whistled to himself. The woman glared him into silence.
Red with embarrassment, Matt grinned sheepishly, trying to pretend he wasn't there, and the woman at last turned back around, resuming her argumentation. It reminded Matt strangely of visits with Keith's Spanish friend.
Quana's mother glared, hands on her hips. "Kreah!"
"Abukos."
The big woman sighed, staring at Matt again, making him feel extremely uncomfortable.
The door slid open once more, and a big hand clamped around his neck, dragging him out into a long gray corridor with dark red flooring.
"C'mon, lady! I can walk by myself! You don't have to push me!"
Quana muttered something to her mother and the woman stopped, placing a hand on her chest. "Dana Tama Falcameer...Tama."
Matt pointed nervously to her. "Dana?"
The woman nodded. "Dana Tama."
"Oh! Nice to meet you, Dana. Um, I'm Matt."
"Matt," Quana said. "She just said her name was Tama."
"Oh." He pointed to her. "Tama?"
Nodding, the woman let go of him. "Garu liduli conik."
"She says to keep up, Matt."
"Sure." As Matt followed them down the hallway, Quana started back at it with her mother again.
The two Abreyas stomped on in a fuming silence, grumpily marching through a copper door.
A brilliant green light nearly blinded Matt as he followed them into a glass tunnel overlooking a forest and a series of spindly legged buildings. After making sure a floor lay below him, he stumbled forward on a moving sidewalk.
The mother and daughter still weren't speaking to each other. Matt stared out the windows.
Beyond the glass stood trees taller than redwoods, and spherical buildings floating on tiny metal legs. When Matt leaned over the railing, he could see nothing but layer upon layer of gnarled tree branches, treehouse-like office buildings and metal beams. He sucked in his breath, stepping back until he bumped into a center rail. Look at the floor. Look at the floor.
"Chik yisnaa hua ausuhi ge'l scrumsaarg," said Quana.
"Guep? Yunk yi?"
"Zoor hua jomofo bea Jiticuha de Takofuea."
Matt's ears perked up at the mention of the monastery. Tama frowned.
After a long argument, the Abreyas fell silent again.
"Chik adanvateb hurota, gimble," said Quana's mother. "Chik yi pagagingahan debotokteb Takofuea?"
Matt frowned at the repeated mention of the place. From the tone of voice, it didn't sound like a "Yes, you can go."
"Hua'ib, reem. Jagopunua. Jomofithua Jiticuha kai yichik kulwadhua."
The statement resulted in deafening silence. The Abreyas turned their backs to each other, crossing their arms indignantly.
The moving sidewalk rolled them through lengthy stone tunnels, then another glass one. While Matt found the view breathtaking, he really wished for the conveyor to stop.
He sneaked around Quana's back, tugging on her tail.
"Hey!"
"Couldn't resist," he chuckled. "It's just so handy!"
Quana frowned, putting her hands on her hips. "If you had a tail, I'd be showing you a thing or two!"
"Just teasing."
She laughed, giving him a light jab to the shoulder.
"How much further do we have to go?"
"Oh? Probably about twenty-four aryobs." Upon seeing his blank look, she added, "Roughly seven miles."
"Miles? Holy cow!" He sat down on the track.
"It's going to take a few hours. Some of these Duwakys have chairs. This one unfortunately doesn't."
"Gee, you guys really need to start working on a teleportation device."
"If you can figure out a way to disassemble the molecules of a living creature without killing it, let me know."
"At least we don't have to walk all the way."
"Don't say that. These conveyors are known to break occasionally."
Matt sighed. "She knows I'm an alien, doesn't she."
"Um, I don't know...she is getting suspicious."
"Should I get out of here, then?"
"No, don't worry about it."
"I knew it. I knew you weren't being honest with me."
"Look. I didn't know how to fake your disguise looked until now."
A dolphin-like creature flitted through the air near the window. "What's that?"
Quana turned to look, but the airborne creature had already flapped out of view. "What's what?"
"...Nothing. Can I ask what you and Tama were fighting about?"
"She's not happy I ran away. I was supposed to marry Choxu of the Voorop nation, but he got tired of waiting and married Princess Thiftreda instead." She sighed. "Apparently we almost went to war with over it."
"That sounds a little bit ridiculous."
"It is."
"What about your...substitute? What's her name?"
"Ippi." Quana shook her head. "Mom didn't buy it. She threw her in prison."
"Even though you put her up to it?"
"Mom didn't care. She wouldn't even let her explain."
"That sucks. But I guess she was a repeat offender anyway."
"Yeah, I just feel bad about it. I hope your Jesus can forgive me. I know Ippi won't."
Matt opened his mouth, then closed it again.
Quana stared out the glass. "Mom didn't want to tell me how many days it took her to notice that Ippi wasn't me. It must have worked a lot longer than she'll admit, being that she was so busy with meetings and all. I'm pretty sure she didn't find out until Choxu told her." She sighed, absently rubbing her tail. "Sometimes I feel I'm closer to the palace servants than I am to mom."
"That stinks."
She scooted closer to him. "Did you know mom put out a reward for my return?"
Matt smiled. "Does that mean I get something?"
"Funny." Her tail flicked from side to side. "It's just not fair. Mom is using me like a bargaining chip in her little political game. She thinks my marrying that heathen Nabal is going to bring peace and prosperity."
"This isn't the middle ages, right? You have spaceships. I'm right, aren't I?"
She shook her head. "It's a political move. You don't get territory, but...it strengthens political alliances, economics, and sometimes we get large factories."
The dolphin thing swam past the window again, but it disappeared before Matt could ask about it. "Were you talking to your mother about that...monastery place?"
"I was. Mom didn't believe it when I said I was joining the Jiticuha. She wants me to stay the night and `think it over.'"
"That's fair, I guess."
Bang. A huge brown bird cracked the glass with its blue beak. Matt flinched. "Hey! What's going on? What is that?"
"It's a wild Grunkiahu. They rove around the Joreh in packs. The only explanation I can think of for this one's behavior is that it must be mating season."
"Don't you have...animal control or something?"
"We sent a party out to catch them a year ago. They all died."
Matt's jaw dropped. "Really? How do you allow something that dangerous to keep happening?"
"Actually, they're not that bad, they just get defensive when cornered, like a horse."
The glass shattered, and the bird beak sniffed around the interior. Its beating wings slowed as it took longer and longer sniffs, its feathered visage blinking at the interior in confusion. With a puzzled mooing sound and a shrug of its wings, the creature flew away.
Matt sighed in relief. "Does that happen often?"
"Not really. Maybe it was mom's shiny jewelry or something that set it off."
After giving Matt a suspicious stare, Tama initiated another lengthy conversation with her daughter. Quana replied something back.
"Redaheo brileiuje. Cao hei bea bebak johoca de secujore, jeko." Tama put her hands on her hips, giving Matt more suspicious looks. Letting out an amused snort, the woman locked eyes with him. "Can you hear me now?"
Matt stared at her in bewilderment. "Huh? I...guess I can hear you...Why?"
"Are you suffering from allergies, sinus pressure or constipation?"
"Umm," Matt stammered. "No."
"Do you suffer from chronic or persistent heartbore two or three times a week?"
He shook his head.
"Have you driven a Ford lately?"
Matt laughed. "Not lately."
"Did you take your break today? Are you ready to get a body of a lifetime?"
He frowned. "Is this going somewhere?"
Scowling, Tama tapped Quana with her tail. "Kreah chik jaiteb con ruhd earthling?"
[0000]
Current page count for the "Quacebs" novel: 120, and that's only because I put spaces in between each line. It could actually be a lot less than that. Believe it or not, thanks to a great editing job, I just saved you from having to wade through an extra 80 pages (this used to be the end of page 200!).
[0000]
ALIEN CHARACTERS:
Choxu: Prince of the Voorop nation, previous suitor for Quana Falcameer.
Nabal: Prince of Kadegni, fiancee of arranged marriage to Quana Falcameer.
Quana Falcameer: Princess of Pathilon.
Rusa: A male arranged to be Quana's suitor.
Tama Falcameer: Queen of Pathilon.
Thiftreda: Princess of another nation bordering Bencap.
GLOSSARY
Abreya: Furry aliens with bare humanoid faces and hands, long opossum-like tails, and feet resembling human hands.
Auno: Powerful subatomic unit, providing energy surpassing that of nuclear fission or fusion.
Bariafu: A special cloaking system for Pathilonian spaceships.
Bedzyk: First female ever created, according to Gaxea.
Beaurbak: Security device on a spaceship.
Boomosi: Far rural area of Pathilon, inhabitants known to be uneducated bumpkins.
Bub Tig: Special entree enjoyed by Abreyas.
Chirqui: Obelisks that absorb essences of sacrifices, transporting them to Kwibron, for the honor of Ponai.
Deglos: Planet near Abreya planet Pathilon.
Deoring: Paradise planet described in Holy Gaxea.
Duvalha: A dictatorial nation of Kaybok system history.
Duwaky: Transit tunnel.
Ferleok: Coldest of the eleven planets of the Kaybok planetary system.
Fetmip: Chemical that can change coloration of your blushing and blood.
Fopakna: Quaceb anointing ritual.
Fotebja: Abreya entertainment device.
Fubalca: Special knockout gas developed by Abreyas. Contains a percentage of breathable air.
Futamer: Planet destroyed in Auno wars of Duvalha.
Gaxea: The core Quaceb religious book.
Gogibi: Cryogenic stasis machine.
Gojot: "Living room" of a spacecraft.
Gi'uz: Ceremonial Quaceb headwear for males and females.
Haxgorg: Personal toilet waste disposal appliance.
Hirejosi: A sawing machine.
Hoyroq: Premium sacrificial animal used to expunge Quacebs from their sins.
Iznolgu: Environment suit.
Jiticuha: A monastic organization.
Jufuceri: Planet in which law treaties regarding Auno energy were drafted.
Kadegni: Country located close to border of Bencap.
Kaiaquke: Stellar nursery
Kecuru: Special mineral found on planet Deglos.
Kicabaii: Special gas that exists on Kugifogelo, has unusual properties that affect coloration of its atmosphere.
Kisostrom: A book in the Quaceb Holy Gaxea.
Kugifogelo: Planet nearest Abreya planet Pathilon.
Kwibron: Core religious site for the Quaceb faith.
Lemwag: Abreya showering cubicle.
Lerilite: Laser sawing element on an Hirejosi.
Lyuntaaz: Quaceb religious observance similar to passover and Hanukkah.
Medufa: "Planet of Temptation/Downfall" according to Gaxea.
Mimapi: Matriarchs of the Gaxea.
Miricacci Sector: A galaxy containing the Abreya universe.
Nafnith: Main world altar of Quaceb faith.
Navaktos: Quaceb ceremonial mats.
Neflah: Ceremonial Quaceb headwear for females.
Obnurd: Personal toilet waste disposal appliance.
Pabizol: Vision correcting devices.
Pathilon: Planet of Abreyas.
Pija: A staple food for Abreyas, similar to wheat.
Pijaturu Festival: A grand celebration that harkens back to ancient times, regarding the harvest of Pija.
Pihodai: A group of Abreya Quacebs described in the Gaxea.
Pocwam: A Quaceb saint.
Ponai: Quaceb religious name for God.
Pufedaga: Special mineral found on Ferleok.
Pulotage: Docking center at Bencap palace.
Quaceb: A monotheistic Abreya religion, or one who adheres to the religion.
Quidsy: Spaceship manufacturing company.
Rilla: First Abreya ever created, according to the Gaxea.
Rujodale: An alien type of furniture, resembling a Venus flytrap.
Rukhag: A month on the Abreya calendar.
Saholiqe: A country on one of the planets described in Gaxea.
Sihiku of Tocedopu: Alien tree of forbidden knowledge, described in the Gaxea.
Stopamoya Jerz: Famous Quaceb saint/Pocwam.
Supica: Quana's spaceship.
Takofuea: Quaceb monastery.
Tagososi Bosigoqa/"Flash Matter Transit Zone": Hidden area of space where bubbles of time can be encountered.
Tarru Lorejiba: Matrimony. Literally "Binding of tails."
Tuldil of Fuceti: A second version of the tree of forbidden knowledge, according to the Gaxea.
Vanseb: Quaceb religious temple.
Voorop: Nation adjacent to Bencap.
Wava: "Tongue", the language of Abreyas.
Wighesh: Dress-like garment worn by male Abreyas.
Witad: Spirit of Ponai.
Wodov: Priest or priestess of Quaceb faith.
Wusu: A chicken-like creature used as livestock.
Zorlaeba: "The Evil One."
Zux Leem: An alien fruit.
WAVA LESSONS:
Note: These aren't solid rules. I got tired of trying to trying to write stuff in Wava after awhile and just threw everything together. Sometimes I didn't even spell the alien words correctly.
Bitu: Indicates future tense.
Bri: Used before a word to indicate plural forms.
`Ih: Used to indicate past tense.
Teb: Indicates action progressively, like "ing" in English. Example: "Walking" would be "Jujagteb", not "Jujago".
Paga: "Quality of being". Example: "Borpaga" (Worriment).
Yi: Functions the same as "not" when added to words.
Contractions: Words can be combined into contractions. Example: Guki'ua=Guki+Hua ("May I"), Chibya=chik+bya (you were)
NUMBERS:
Dool: 10
Rey: 9
Fat: 8
Dolsike: 7
Leeg: 6
Diete: 5
Ri: 4
Oim: 3
Hanna: 2
Bid: 1
LEXICON:
Aaberahu: Solely/strictly/alone
Abukos: Nothing
Adanep: Behavioral model
Ahdep: Halt!
Aiju: Closer
Andere: Amen
Aoqigoia: Neutralize
Artane: Beacon
Audep: Halt!
Ausuhi: Force (v)
Batua: Dressed/wearing
Bea: The
Bebak: Other
Baueco: Bless/guide
Benuforte: Prophet
Benuton: Prophecy
Bisa: Who
Bixok: Queen
Boine: Bless
Boqadi: Proof
Boru: Worry
Bya: Was
Cacurei: View (n)
Cajbei: Trouble/problem
Cagote: Ignorant
Cao: Far
Capamfe: Wonderful
Ceo: Her
Chik: You
Chisda: Heaven
Clozaril: Disable
Con: With
Coz: As/for/from
Culumafa: Worship/adore
Daced: Plan
Dahna: I am
De: Of
Debotoke: Consider
Demofoa: Order
Depogast: Reenter
Devibo: Pagan/unbeliever/heathen
Duboqidu: Grant/allow
Duquedaka: System
Duigoje: Separated
Dutio: Happen/occur
Eidaraba: Guess/suppose
Eiko/wof: Now
Emilihu: Threat
Eyap Mez: Good night
Fepahoi: Choice/option
Feut: Whether/if
Fito: At/to
Gac: Have
Garu: Keep
Garzok: Heathen
Geben: Father
Gebupega: "People" (Abreyas)
Gefmoo: Another
Ge'l: He
Gik: We
Giperhofi: "Weirdo"
Gimble: Affectionate nickname like "honey".
Gingahan: Serious
Giwi: Will
Glaap: Want
Gosaca: Engine
Guep: Yes
Guki: May/might/can/could
Guom: Where
Gurabo: About/concerning/on
Ha: Or
Hapa: Eat
Hei: On
Hib: Is/are
Hieroda: Alarm
Hua: Me
Huqea: Fake/false/artificial/fraud
Hurota: Foolish
Ip: An/"A"
Jagopune: Give up/surrender/leave
Jaii: Do
Jegfoj: Clever
Jeko: Also
Jiaz: Like
Jocabai: These
Johoca: Side
Jomofo: Join
Jub: So (in order that)
Jujago: Walk
Julujau: Invalid
Kai: And
Kalaja: Political
Kee: So (interjection)
Kenuiji: Prepare
Kigo: Sorry
Kimera: Present/presence
Knoli: Find/discover
Kolapibu: Sharing
Kreah: What
Kuiyo: Holy
Kulwad: Stop
Labuc: By/under the order of/under/subject to
Layd: Here
Legparf: Mean
Leijue: Thief
Liduli: Pace
Lifahu: During
Lorejiba: Bind
Mese: Too/very
Micha: "Little"/"small", often used affectionately.
Minahujo: Display/show (v)
Moqo: In/inside
Najikece: Detect
Najufe: Boyfriend
Narun: Male
Neebee: Search
Niblet: Kill/destroy/shut off
Nuqida: Prison/jail
Nux: Help
Oopuhane: Individual
Paneciqa: Everywhere
Parehe: Then
Patnar: Firing
Patuihi: Defect
Pebe: Say
Pihile: Clearly/definitely
Pimopek: Exterior
Pisoqo: Just/only
Pofokiai: Password
Puguqe: Belong to
Pusasuji: Hide/conceal
Qasolire: Purpose/Reason
Qecajeda: Birth
Qiol: My/mine
Qoeloqe: Challenge/competition
Quako: Self
Quayhox: Fur
Qiciheli: Recording
Qidu: Table
Raraba: Must
Redaheo: Nice/fine
Remabe/Reem: Mother/mom
Riko: Be
Ritaqomi: Approaching
Roca: Within
Rofi: By
Rudibugu: Background
Ruhd: This
Rulijo: What we have?
Saojifa: Security
Scrumsaarg: Marriage
Sejucore: Planet
Shnarf: That/concerning
Siruka: Wrong
Snaa: Able/can
Soisofu: Family
Soqokuru: Identify
Sotukobe: Religion
Subecosu: Bother
Tarru: Tail
Tebesoe/Tebesque: Command
Tocedopu: Wisdom
Tohibou: Run/operate
Toihoja: Board(v)
Toib: See
Tuc: "Child" or "Baby", usually used condescendingly or as a pet name.
Ucuk: Speak
Umua: Thank you
Vatus: King/ruler/lord
Viravo: How
Yok: No
Yunk: Why
Zaib: Correct
Zoor: Because/since