February was unrelaxed. The last weeks of the month were spent cooped up inside, out of the bitter wind that reminded James and Lily of Hogwarts winters. They saw very little of Remus, who was busy with work. Even Sirius, who was unemployed, had little time to do anything else but work on his 'project'. This would have left James and Lily plenty of time to enjoy with Harry before James received word from the Auror office, or went in search of more work. However, this was not the case. Lily spent most mornings on the bathroom floor with her head in the toilet. James spent his time either looking out the window or standing outside in the cold.
Every morning, Lily awoke to James grabbing his dressing gown and wand and racing around the house, checking each room for intruders. Then, he would run outside and check the outside. He would stay there, watching the horizon, watching the sky, watching the path from the nearest town that lead to theirs and The Tonks' houses. Lily would have to drag him back inside, where he would stand at the window, clutching his wand.
"She's not coming for us," Lily said to him on the last day of February. "And even if she does, we can just kill her."
"I bet Alice said that to Frank once," was his reply.
Lily took him by the elbow and ushered him inside. His gaze was locked on the sky until Lily shut the door.
oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo
11th February 1982
James woke up in the early hours of the morning, and grabbed his wand from the bedside table.
Their bedroom window was sealed shut. The small gap in their curtains let in the dim blue glow of the winter morning into their room, washing their white bed sheets in a cold blue hue and illuminating the back wall in a bleak forewarning of the coming day.
Lily was still asleep for now. Her face and bare shoulders were still ensconced in darkness but the morning light exposed the way the duvet had slipped down the bed, revealing her bare breasts and tummy. James smiled at the memory of their activities the night before, engaged in when they were pleasantly surprised at how quickly Harry fell asleep that evening.
James slid out of the bed and crept out of the room and across the landing. Before he went down the stairs, he aimed his wand at Harry's door and took down the charms that Lily had placed there last night.
Every night since his conversation with Lestrange, Lily and James had put every security charm on Harry's door and window that they could think of. Remus had given them the invaluable Amplification charm, which they used to make the creaking of Harry's door so loud that they would be forced awake if anyone tried to enter his room. They were foolproof charms, or so James thought until the day he'd forgotten to disable the Amplification charm when he went to check on Harry in the middle of the night and ended up waking Lily, Ted, Andromeda, Nymphadora and just about everyone who lived within half a mile of their house.
With the charms disabled, James entered Harry's room. He was lying on his back in his cot, fast asleep. James could hear his soft breathing from the other end of the room, the house was so quiet. Harry's hand twitched in his sleep, like it always did.
James would not go back to sleep again, so shut Harry's door without putting up any charms. He went downstairs and shivered as he walked through the chilly cold-tiled kitchen. It seemed lighter here, as though morning had broken closer to the ground today.
He removed the charms from the back door and stepped outside.
The morning was what James liked to think of as a Lily-Morning. The cold was as delicate as the songs of the thrushes and sparrows in the hedgerows surrounding the two houses. The grass was crisped with frozen dew, which made the paths and garden fence sparkle. Lily's sort of morning. Quiet.
James' eyes scanned the path from the village, the fields surrounding them and the lightening sky. He felt silly, standing in such tranquillity and clutching a wand, ready for combat. But he was not alone...
Andromeda Tonks was stood on her doorstep, looking up at the sky too. She was in a dressing gown, a steaming mug in one hand and her other arm rigid by her side. James wondered whether she was holding her wand, like he was.
Andromeda spotted him then, and jumped a little when she saw him. James waved at her. She gave a little wave back. She was indeed holding a wand.
Two people stood outside their houses: an enemy and a sister. Both were targets. What could a person deduce from that about the huntress who sought them out?
oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo
Six hours later, Lily was sat with Andromeda and Nymphadora Tonks on the floor of their lounge by the small coffee table, upon which sat a plate of croissants that Andromeda had baked for them. Lily was petting Tuppy, the cat who was usually trembling in fear in a cupboard, hiding from their enormous owl. It was nice to give her Hogwarts companion some attention for once, while Dora distracted Harry with the stuffed rainbow crocodile she'd made for him at Christmas.
"I love babies," Dora sighed. "I can't wait to be a grown up. I'm going to have loads of kids. At least four."
"Please don't," said Andromeda. "You'll kill them all."
Dora ignored her, turning her attention back to Harry, who was happy to roll a ball across the floor for a while.
Andromeda picked up her wand from the floor. "Accio mead," she said, pointing it at the kitchen. Lily tried not to raise her eyebrows as the stout brown bottle that Andromeda had brought as a gift several days ago came bobbing along in the air towards them. "Can I tempt you, Potter?"
"It's a bit early for me," replied Lily, who didn't want to reveal her secret just yet. There was a protocol for telling people about a baby. Or at least, there was for Lily and James. Remus already knew, and that was fine. Sirius had yet to be told, and he would be next. And Lily also maintained a hope that Petunia would be interested.
"So..." Andromeda began, lowering her voice and shuffling closer to Lily. "Tell me about the meeting with... our mutual friend."
Lily glanced at Dora, and saw that her focus was so trained on Harry that she would probably be oblivious to everything they were saying.
"Well..." Lily began unsurely, realizing that she didn't know the full extent of Andromeda's apathy towards her sister. Lily, herself, couldn't fathom what total indifference would feel like. "How much do you know about him already?"
"A lot. You forget that I spent six years in the same common room as him. Why?"
"He was a bit odd. I wondered if he'd always been like that or if it was Voldemort who made him that way."
Andromeda's playful smirk faltered at the mention of the dead wizard. She looked down at the bottle of mead she'd been sipping from. "By 'odd', you mean..."
"A psychopath."
"Ah."
"Was he like that when he was younger?"
Andromeda's eyes glossed over as she recalled the teenage Death Eater. "Yes and no."
"Helpful."
"He wasn't weird. All the girls fancied him except for me and Bellatrix, but he was unpopular. He just kept to himself, his brother and one other boy. They were arseholes. Hard to believe, isn't it?"
Lily smiled. "It's hard to imagine Death Eaters as ever being children..."
"That's when You-Know-Who first recruited them. In seventh year."
"Oh... Wow. Jesus.."
"Quite."
Lily wondered what the trigger was, for evil. Surely, for Bellatrix, there must have been a point in time when she became capable of murder. It could not have been drip-fed into her by her parents, because Andromeda was different. It made Bellatrix think of their family circumstances. Was Bellatrix born evil? Would her child be? With whom did she share that child?
"Wait..." said Lily, remembering something. " If Bellatrix didn't like Rodolphus-"
"She couldn't stand him!" Andromeda chuckled, taking a sip of mead.
"Why did she marry him?"
Andromeda coughed on her mead. "You can talk, you hypocrite!"
Lily rolled her eyes. "James was a wanker but he wasn't a leering manipulative murderer."
"Ah, but that's just Bella's type!"
Lily laughed nervously.
Andromeda smiled. "Actually, I think Bellatrix hated Rodolphus even more than you ever disliked James. He was horrible. He used to toy with the girls that liked him and then harass the girls who didn't."
"So he harassed Bellatrix into liking him."
Andromeda's smile faded. "Not quite."
Lily glanced over at Dora and Harry before continuing. "He told us something we weren't expecting..."
Andromeda didn't seem to register.
"It was about Bellatrix..."
"Missus Potter, I think Harry needs a nappy change." Dora interrupted.
Lily looked over at the two children. Harry was sat, contently chewing on a wooden horse, while Dora looked disgusted.
"We'll leave you to it," said Andromeda, standing up. "Can I keep this?" she asked, holding the mead bottle out to Lily.
"Er- sure. I'll see you later."
Andromeda and Dora made a swift exit.
While Lily changed Harry, she could not shake the image of a round-faced jewel-eyed Bellatrix Lestrange, with equally young and naive Lestrange boys, armed with killing curses being sent to the homes of muggle-borns. She could picture them in an old, dark, creaking house, stood in a regimental line while Voldemort looked them up and down, watching for flinches and sweat.
Even Voldemort's finest and most trusted Death Eaters had started somewhere. But as students living in the most secure castle in the world, Voldemort could not have recruited them on his own. At some point, someone must have become Voldemort's First Death Eater, then Second Death Eater, then Third... a substantial army would have been formed before the recruitment of school children, surely? Who came before the Lestranges?
But the dim anxiety of suspicion was quickly washed away with one thought: Peter.
He had been a sweet little boy once. He had shouted at James on Lily's behalf once. A Death Eater would never defend a muggle-born against a pureblood. Was Peter a Death Eater? Where was he? What was he thinking right this second?
Lily brought Harry back down to the lounge to play with his toys. The room was darkened now, most of the light having been blocked by the enormous owl that was sitting outside the window. Tuppy, the cat, was once again cowering behind the door.
"Bloody owl..." Lily grumbled, setting Harry down on the floor. She went to the window and opened the latch. Cadwal hopped in, clutching the morning's post. A rolled up Prophet and a letter were pinched together in his beak. He dropped them into Lily's waiting hands.
"Thankyou," she mumbled to the owl. "Now go and kill some cattle or something."
The bird swooped off, Lily closed the window and sat down in the armchair. She unrolled the Daily Prophet first.
The panic returned.
MUGGLE FAMILY FOUND DEAD IN FOREST. MAGIC SUSPECTED.
A muggle family, including an elderly woman, were found dead in the Forest of Avon last night. Aurors were called to the scene after the muggle Prime Minister met with Minister Milicent Bagnold. Local residents reported sights of green flashing light in the centre of the forest at approximately 3:00PM yesterday to the muggle authorities. A team of Aurors are said to have been searching the forest since the deaths were reported. Bagnold and Auror Head Rufus Scrimgeour are expected to make a statement later today.
Lily did not read the rest of the article. She put the paper down, unable to stand or speak. She looked down at the letter. It was addressed to James. She turned it over. The Ministry's seal was stamped on.
oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo
The euphoric cheering that James had spent the past weeks hoping for if he ever got accepted into the Auror programme never happened. He saw the Prophet first, and opened the letter afterwards. The ominous parallels between the Aurors' new threat and the sudden recruitment of apprentices was blindingly obvious. Though they were both worried, James did not want to admit to Lily that he had been secretly hoping for this to happen. He was ready to go into battle with Bellatrix Lestrange.
The wary anticipation for the unknown, like the hot heavy sensation of waiting for your rollercoaster to drop, returned to James as though it had never been away when he, Lily and Harry flooed to Sirius Black's flat. However, when they arrived, they were not sure they'd reached the right flat at all.
The shell of dingy blackened wood was gone. They were instead surrounded by brightness. White walls, clean air and sunlight made for an entirely unfamiliar place.
"Where are we?" Lily asked in disbelief.
"What is that smell?" asked James, wrinkling his nose.
"I think its... lavender..."
James shivered.
They stepped out of the fireplace and into the room. James recognised the layout of Sirius' flat but only just. White glossy paint had been applied to the rotting window panes. There was a sky blue settee in the spot where Sirius' grim old sofa once sat. In fact, every item of furniture in the flat had been replaced with a lighter, cleaner upgrade.
"Is he dying?" asked James.
"Maybe he's sold the flat and not told us..."
They heard footsteps from the hall. They turned and watched the door. Seconds later, Sirius strode in to the living room carrying a large wooden crate, wearing nothing but a loose dressing gown, whistling a tune.
"Good morning, Sirius..." said Lily.
He looked at them in surprise. "Oh. Erm..." he dumped the crate on the floor by his feet and stretched. "Wasn't expecting you."
"Clearly," she replied. "Do you want to put some pants on?"
Sirius' eyes widened. "Bugger." He immediately grabbed his gown and pulled it tight around himself, quickly fastening the tie. "Sorry about that."
"Well Harry's not quite old enough to obtain traumatic memories, so you're safe," said James. "Got a minute?"
Sirius glanced down at the crate on the floor. "Erm... yeah. Hang on," he picked up the crate and disappeared down the hall. Seconds later, he was back.
"What was in that crate?" asked James, narrowing his eyes in melodramatic suspicion.
"Nothing," said Sirius quickly. "That was, er... so what brings you two here?"
The three adults sat on the sofas, with Harry placed on the floor. Sirius took his wand from his pocket and aimed it at a spot on the floor. "Expecto Patronum," he cast, providing Harry with a misty apparition of a dog to play with.
"Have you read the Prophet today?" Lily asked Sirius.
"I certainly have," said Sirius. "You two think it's Bellatrix?"
"No, it was Harry..." James muttered.
Lily put her hand on James' arm. "We do think it was Bellatrix," she said, still talking to Sirius. "We wanted to warn you in case you hadn't heard the news."
Sirius nodded. "Do we know who the victims were?"
"No. They won't publish the names of muggle victims. I'll find out, though. I'll grab a muggle newspaper when I can." Lily then glanced at James. "We have other news too..."
James grinned "Lily's pregnant."
Sirius' eyes widened. "Really?"
"Oh..." said Lily, looking at James. "That wasn't what I was going to say. I was going to mention the other thing..."
"What other thing?" asked James.
"The thing... in the letter you got this morning... the big news...?"
"Okay, now I'm worried..." interrupted Sirius. "News that's bigger than a second baby can't be good..."
Lily turned back to face him. "James got into the Auror Programme. The baby thing is true too, but I-"
"Wow..." Sirius gasped, sitting back. "New job, new baby... Man of the Hour, again, Prongs..."
"Well it's not definite, it's just the recruitment programme," shrugged James. Lily rolled her eyes.
"Nevertheless, you seem to have grabbed luck by the balls, Potter."
Suddenly, the fireplace erupted in green flames again. In a rather startling entrance, Isabelle Sommier leapt out of the flames the second she appeared, threw herself across over the arm of Sirius' sofa and crashed at his side. "BLOODY BUGGERING FUCK!" she shouted into a cushion.
"Hi, Isabelle," said James.
"Oh," Isabelle mumbled, struggling into a sitting position which took more effort that it would for someone who wasn't in their uniform blue power suit. "I didn't realise you two would be here..." as she brushed stray tendrils of hair out of her face, she noticed the glowing dog patronus that was rolling around on the floor, with Harry staring at it. "Oh God... I'm so sorry... I don't normally like swearing..."
"That's a lie," said Sirius. "You just lied."
"I'm dreadfully sorry..." she panted. "Work is just... impossible at the moment. I've had to floo here just for two minutes' break. It's pandemonium at the Ministry... The Minister's breathing fire, there are random people I've never met rushing around in my office and Blandings is supposed to be helping me deliver files but all he's done so far today is fuck up Malfoy's sodding tea order! Sorry, again..."
James looked questioningly at her. "Malfoy? As in Lucius Malfoy?"
Isabelle rolled her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, he's... oh, never mind. I'm not allowed to talk about it. Merlin, I wasn't even supposed to mention his name... wow... thank God Rodney Carstone quit when he did... when he was Minister, all his office staff had to make an unbreakable vow of confidentiality. Bagnold just made us sign a thing. She wants to make unbreakable vows illegal... oh shit, I shouldn't have told you that... sorry, again... I promise I don't normally swear this much..."
"Lies," whispered Sirius.
"It's just the stress of work... just came here for a break..."
"Don't worry, Dear," Sirius smiled, patting her on the knee. "James and Lily were just leaving."
James glanced at Lily again, who was clenching her jaw: an acknowledgement of his look, but not wanting to make it obvious.
"Okay... we'll be off, then..." said James, standing up and then stooping down to pick up Harry. Sirius' patronus disappeared, and Harry began to cry.
"Full moon tonight, Padfoot," James reminded Sirius as they made their way to the fireplace.
"I'll be there," assured Sirius. "And I reckon we should meet in the woods by your house. Who knows, maybe Lestrange is lurking there and Moony will rip her face off."
oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo
For the first time since Voldemort's death, the Potters returned to Godric's Hollow undisguised and visible. The village had thawed, no longer under a foot of snow, and the green grass of the front lawns and churchyard were a nice welcoming contrast to the spindly dormant trees.
They arrived on broomsticks, with James leading the way and Lily following slowly behind, Harry tied to her in a swaddling cloth. They landed in the village square, having seen that not a soul was around. When they were on the ground, the only sounds in the village were their feet and their exhilarated breathing from the flight.
"This is unexpected," commented James, pulling his cloak around him as the wind picked up.
"Looks like our fifteen minutes of fame are up," replied Lily.
"I wouldn't be so sure of that..."
Lily looked at James. He was pointing to the remains of their old house. At the gate were dozens of bunches of flowers.
Lily had forgotten how sad her old house looked now. It was completely dead. But her heart did not ache like it used to when she looked at it. It was just a building, with flowers at the gate.
"That's morbid..." James stated. "It looks like we died. I don't remember that. Or maybe we did die, and the last wisps of our souls are staying on to oversee the capture of the last Death Eaters."
"Do you think the house looks different?" asked Lily as they approached its gate.
James cocked his head to the side. "It looks like it's slouching."
"It looks smaller. On the night that Voldemort died, it looked massive."
"Maybe that's just because there are four of us now. Everything looks smaller when another person joins in."
"It's weird. We'll have a child that never set foot in that house."
James shrugged. "Doesn't bother me."
"No. Me neither."
They left the gate and continued up the narrow street to the shadowy cul-de-sac where Bathilda Bagshot's house was. Lily mentally observed that this house, too, looked smaller.
James knocked on the door.
They listened for sounds of life inside. They heard nothing.
"Bathilda?" called James. "You in there?"
They heard a chair scrape.
James bent down to address the key hole. "You alright?" he peered in. "Keyhole's blocked..."
Lily's stomach lurched. "James..."
An oval-shaped section of wood on the front door seemed to be rippling, as though it were a silk ribbon floating in a breeze. Lily grabbed James by the shoulder of his cloak and dragged him back. "James, what if-"
"You two need to leave," said a voice that was, thankfully, Bathilda's, as the rippling wood dissolved like gas into a gaping hole in the door. Bathilda's scowling face was now visible through the door. "You are unwelcome here."
"Bathilda, it's us," repeated James, confused. "We thought we'd stop by and say hello."
"I don't care. You have to go. I don't want to see you."
Lily and James exchanged alarming flickering resemblances to their younger fearful selves, hearing what they'd heard before from Order members coming from their old friend.
Lily leaned forward to get close to the scowling old woman. "Bathilda... " she murmured. "If someone's in there with you, we can help..."
Lily was staring at the tip of Bathilda's wand for half a second before she was suddenly staggering backwards from the shock of a painful face spasm.
"What the hell was that?!" exclaimed James.
"One of my own body-particular variations of the knock-back jinx. Lonely old ladies like me have to learn to defend themselves against unwanted visitors." Bathilda spoke with an unfamiliar air of smugness. When Lily's face had stopped twitching, she could see Bathilda standing taller.
"Why are we 'unwanted visitors'?" asked James. "Why did you do that?!"
"There's no Death Eater in my house, James. I've spent nearly three months on my own here, without a single visitor. You're showing up here now because the pair of you have nothing better to do. Get a job and leave me alone."
"I do have a job but it doesn't start 'til next week-"
The wood in the door returned, sealing the hole shut. Bathilda was out of sight.
"Are you alright?" James asked Lily.
"Yeah... good one, mentioning your job, James. Brilliant idea."
"What you having a go at me for?! She hexed you!"
"For no reason!"
"Slithering up to her like that... 'we can helllllp youuuuu...'... no wonder she fought you off!"
Harry was paying no attention to his parents. He was instead looking around at the rickety houses with an expression, Lily noticed, of unease and suspicion. The pair turned quiet, matching the breezy emptiness of Godric's Hollow. The Tudor wood beams holding the houses upright creaked as the wind tunnelled down the street.
"It's creepy here," said James.
"It never used to be."
"There never used to be the violent death of a demonic war lord hanging over the village."
"Even the neighbours have changed their tune..." Lily murmured.
James looked at Harry, and noticed his sombre expression. He silently picked up his broomstick from where he'd propped it up against Bathilda's house and Lily followed suit. They kicked off from the ground and flew back home, without looking back.
oOo oOo oOo oOo oOo
They were impatient for the sun to set. It sank slower behind the hills these days, with spring just one rainfall away. The full moon was premature in the sky, pale and ghostly behind a spread of glowing pink clouds. James left the house while the light was still out, the grim image of Remus' bones cracking into their lupine shape in daylight urging him out to the barren hills earlier than planned. Lily stood at the living room window, watching him go. When he was out of view, Lily sat back down on the floor with Harry, and watched the shadows of her furniture grow longer, like stretching fingers reaching across the floor, grazing her son's body, and engulfing him. She picked him up, gathered some toys, and abandoned their house in favour of Andromeda's.
Lily hadn't interrupted anything when she'd arrived. Dirty plates and cutlery from dinner were still laid out on the kitchen table, a glass of wine half empty on the counter. Andromeda cleared this all away when Lily arrived, and broke up a banana with her fingers to give to Harry, who sat on Lily's lap until he was done.
When Lily left Harry to sleep on the sofa, the two women found themselves alone.
"Where are the others tonight?" asked Lily, while Andromeda continued cramming clutter into bulging cupboards.
"Nymphadora's at The Weasleys' house and Ted's asleep upstairs. He rarely makes it to nine PM these days. Being back at work has thrown him. Can I tempt you?" Andromeda turned round and held out two wine glasses.
"No thank you," Lily replied quickly. "Is Ted enjoying being back at work?"
"Oh, he bloody loves it," Andromeda sat down at the table with her, with a bottle of red wine and a glass. "He can't get enough of it. Muggles are churning out new stuff every bloody day! He'd spend more time at home if he could bring his muggle stuff home with him, but they don't work here."
"Why not?"
"Electricity. And we can't put charms on them to make them work because they're the property of the Ministry. There are weird laws about this stuff. It's so odd. Ted's got the most mundane job in the Ministry, but it's got the highest security."
Lily smiled. "The trouble with electricity is that you can't put a spell on it to do what you want it to do. It's dangerous. Muggles die because of it."
Andromeda rolled her eyes. "Then why do they still use it?"
Lily shrugged. "Magic kills people. Why do we still use magic?"
"Because we're lazy shits," Andromeda filled her glass, then raised it in Lily's direction. "To magic and electricity!"
"Here here," said Lily, lifting a pretend glass. Andromeda took a large gulp of wine, then when she took the glass away from her lips, stared into the dark red liquid for several seconds before drinking the rest of the glass in one.
"Slow down!" Lily laughed.
"Night-cap," Andromeda explained. "Sleeping is a bitch these days. I envy Ted." Andromeda took the bottle of wine and poured herself another glass. "You sure you don't want any?"
"I'm positive," said Lily, trying not to smirk.
"Well, you're a better woman than me, then," Andromeda lifted the glass in a toast again, nodding it in Lily's direction, before drinking half of it again. "How's the job hunt going?"
"Tragically. I chose the writer's path. Rookie mistake. But James got accepted into the Auror Programme!"
Andromeda's eyes widened in delight, her wine glass still fixed to the glass. "Amazing!" she exclaimed when she put her glass down. "I'll drink to that!" she picked up the wine bottle once more, and poured more wine into the glass.
Lily's smile faded. "Andromeda, you'll make yourself sick."
"I won't," she replied. "I have an extremely high alcohol tolerance."
"Even so..." Lily trailed off, eyeing the bottle of wine that was already almost empty. Andromeda seemed to notice Lily's concern, and watched her face as she put the bottle down.
"Sorry," Andromeda mumbled. "It's become a bit of a habit lately. I know I shouldn't."
Lily lowered her voice. "Is something bothering you?"
Andromeda laughed, unnaturally loudly, in a way that made Lily shiver. "I'm bothered by a great many things, Lily. My life is one giant bother. I seem to be teetering on the liminal between one hell and another."
The room became small and stuffy. "What do you mean?"
Andromeda took a deep breath and lowered her gaze to the table surface. "I thought my only problem this year was going to be saying goodbye to Nymphadora... I never thought... I never imagined that Bellatrix would ever be interested in seeing me again, not even to gloat or... I don't know... but now, all I think about is how I'm going to... stop her from... from..." she closed her eyes, and clasped a hand to her mouth.
Lily put her hand gently atop Andromeda's other one, who let out a deep shaky breath.
"Sorry," said Andromeda, smiling weakly. "You know how it is. Being a mother is shit sometimes. You stop caring about yourself."
"Some mothers do..." Lily murmured.
Andromeda sniffed. "Huh?"
Lily swallowed, and shuffled closer to her. "Bellatrix is pregnant, Andromeda. Rodolphus told us. She planned it."
Lily wasn't sure how she expected Andromeda to react to the news. She knew so little about her, despite having a great fondness for her. She had that nameless trait that drew Lily to James and Marlene. Very little hope for the state of the world, yet seeing the beauty and opportunity in common life. Andromeda, like Lily's past and present loved ones, spread happiness for the sake of happiness.
Andromeda stared into her empty glass with a faint smile. Macabre nostalgia. "When our grandmother first told Bellatrix that she was to marry Rodolphus Lestrange, she murdered her own owl."
Lily stared at her.
"We all knew we would have to marry," Andromeda continued. "Black family legacy and all that. We just... never thought it through. We underestimated how serious our Grandmother was. Bellatrix killed her owl so that she wouldn't receive any letters from mother about getting married. Typical Bellatrix..." Andromeda smirked. "Even when she's burying her head in the sand, she has to take a life."
"How old was she?" asked Lily.
"Seventeen."
When Andromeda saw Lily's appalled expression, she laughed. "They spent their honeymoon shopping for Seventh Year text books..."
"What about you and Narcissa?" Lily asked faintly. "Were you... forced..."
"No," Andromeda smiled. "Narcissa married someone she actually loved. Ironically, her husband was on Grandmother's list of boys they were considering for me."
Lily continued to stare in disbelief.
"Bellatrix had always hated the idea of marriage. When we were little, she told me she was going to run away if father even mentioned marriage. Funny thing was, as soon as Grandmother mentioned Rodolphus Lestrange, Bellatrix killed her owl and then went on a rampage to find someone else to marry."
"...What?"
Andromeda smiled again. "She suggested her best friend, Jesper Goyle, to Grandmother. And the older brothers of this really rich Italian girl who came to Hogwarts and befriended Bella. She became... desperate to get married. Just like that. After years of hating the idea, she was suddenly throwing herself at everyone."
Andromeda filled her glass again.
"I realised, in the end, that she didn't hate marriage at all. She just hated having no control."
"Control..." Lily parrotted. "That's what Rodolphus Lestrange said. He said she wanted a baby to control."
Andromeda smirked. "You and I both know that parenting has got fuck all to do with control."
Lily nodded. "I feel so sorry for that child. Do you think she'll kill it?"
"Oh definitely. If she's not captured by then. If she is, it'll be born in Azkaban and thrown in an orphanage."
Lily rubbed her stomach.
"You alright?" Andromeda asked.
"I'm fine. It's just... sad."
"You sure you don't want any wine?"
Lily smiled and shook her head. "I can't."
Andromeda looked from Lily's face to her stomach. She leapt to her feet and pointed a dramatic accusatory finger at her. "You're pregnant too, you sly wench!"
"Yes! Now stop offering me alcohol!"
"So that's why Rodolphus told you about the baby! That must've freaked you out a bit..."
"It did! How the hell did he know?!"
"He's a legilimens. He's a bit shit, but that's really the only reason Voldemort wanted him."
"That... makes sense. "
"Oh YES this is so exciting! Nymphadora's going to explode... oh, please don't tell her! I want to break the news and see her face! Ahhh!"
Lily laughed, loud and cackly, as Andromeda started rolling her shoulders in a happy dance. She finished, and picked up her glass.
"To Little-Potter-Number-Two!" she raised her glass, took one slow sip, then put the glass down again. "We should celebrate."
"We should!" Lily stood up, energised by the excited mood.
"How? What do you want to do?"
"Ooh... um..."
"Come on! Think! The night is young, we're hiding from a murderous bag of hormones, we have a restless toddler and a nine-month sobriety trip! There is so much we can do!"
Andromeda picked up her glass again. Lily laughed. "Actually, um... I'd quite like to visit Hogsmeade."
"Hogsmeade?"
"The graves."
Andromeda put down her glass. "You're no fun."
Lily shrugged.
"Grab your coat, then. I'll get Harry. I need to bond with him. I'm going to be babysitting him constantly next year."
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Lily got little sleep that night, but not for bad reasons. She was alert anyway, with her husband trotting around a heath with a werewolf all night. She was also replaying her trip to the graves with Andromeda in her mind constantly. They had studied the inscriptions on each tombstone carefully, learning their way around. Lily had told Andromeda about Dorcas Meadowes, and how brilliant she was.
They'd sat at Marlene's grave for a surprisingly short time. Lily had intended to tell Marlene about her new baby, and James' new Auror job, and Bellatrix Lestrange. But when they reached the grave, there was little to say. It seemed, for the first time, that Marlene was not trapped in a dark box under the earth. Instead, she was somewhere else, somewhere bright, somewhere close but unreachable. Marlene was not enraged by Bellatrix's killing spree and ridiculous hopes for motherhood. Marlene was calm, and sad for the world. She was safe in a place where hearts were not concealed in misguiding bodies or clouded in prejudice and fear. She was drifting, peacefully, listening to everything but keeping her distance. There was no contact to yearn for. All love would eventually be reunited in a beautiful place.
But for Lily, the uphill struggle of mortal life would continue for a long while. Her owl came home early that morning, before the sun was fully risen, before James was back. He flew with his usual power, but landed silently and elegantly on the bedpost of Lily's bed.
He dropped the morning's issue of the Daily Prophet at the foot of Lily's bed, just as she sat up. The headline was loud and angry as a hateful kick in the head.
REGULUS BLACK FOUND DEAD
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A/N: Bit short, sorry.
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