Chapter 5 - Life at the Temple

DISCLAIMER: We (unfortunately) do not own Star Wars. :P

Author's Note: In which Ahsoka and Obi-Wan get used to one another, and Ahsoka tries to fit in at the Temple. Part of this is from one of the Anakin & Obi-Wan comics between tPM and AotC. :P

Also, we're almost ready to start writing Chapter 12, which is when Anakin first appears "on screen." ;) That doesn't mean we'll be releasing this any faster though. xD

~ Amina Gila

Ahsoka is in the cafeteria when she senses someone's watching her. This is the Temple, she knows. She's safe here, but her underlying instincts of 'this is never a good sign' start coming to the surface.

She glances around, gaze falling on someone seated at the other end of the long table where she's sitting. A human boy she doesn't recognize is sitting there, staring at her.

"What are you looking at?" she snaps irritably.

"I don't remember seeing you before," he replies, "Aren't you too old to start your training?"

"Well, the Council doesn't think so," she snips, scowling. That's always the first thing people say when they see her. She's getting really tired of it. Why can't they ever just leave her alone and stop bothering her? She's nothing extremely special, except her high midi-whatever count seems to disagree. Ugh.

He's quiet for a moment. "You're hardly special enough to have an exception made for you. You don't belong here." Anger flares inside of her. She knows she's never been accepted here, but hearing it said makes it hurt worse. She jumps to her feet, glaring daggers into him.

"What do you know?" she bites out, "No one's even taken you as a padawan yet."

He stands up too, shooting her a snide look. "What I know is that you're too old to ever become a proper Jedi. The Order doesn't need people like you –" He doesn't manage to finish his sentence before an orange fist connects with his face.

The boy stumbles back a step before swinging back at her, expression outraged. She doesn't even need to think before utilizing the self-defense lessons which her mother taught her. In less than a minute, they're rolling on the floor, trading blows.

"What's going on over here?" a sudden, familiar voice demands sharply.

The words immediately snap her back to reality. Ahsoka hastily disentangles herself from the boy, scrambling to her feet and ignoring the bruise forming on her jaw from the boy's fist. To be fair, he has his own fair share of bruises from her. Her montrals flush a little from embarrassment as she looks up at Obi-Wan. She didn't even realize he was here. How long was he watching? What will he say? Is – is he going to punish her for misbehaving, even if the other boy started the fight?

"She attacked me for no reason!" the boy splutters, glaring at her from the floor.

"Liar!" screeches Ahsoka, forcibly holding back the tears which threaten.

"No name calling," scolds her master, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Neither of you should be fighting."

"He said that I don't belong here," Ahsoka tells him sullenly. She does not regret attacking him.

"That's not a reason to fight," Obi-Wan informs her calmly. "Now, both of you apologize."

"What?" cries the boy standing up. "I didn't do anything to her!"

"You were being unkind," Obi-Wan says sternly, "And you should apologize for it." His gaze turns towards her, and she knows that he's including her in his words. She shrinks back under the scrutiny, wrapping her arms around her body.

"Sorry," she mumbles, staring down at the floor, refusing to meet the initiate's eyes.

"Sorry," he echoes, tone expressing just how not sorry he really is. He whirls, storming off across the cafeteria.

Obi-Wan sighs. "Come, Padawan. Let's go back to our quarters." Ahsoka is silent, letting her master guide her through the halls, a horrible feeling gnawing in the pit of her stomach. What if Obi-Wan decides she's too much of a burden and doesn't want her anymore? What will happen to her then? Where would she go? She's too young to do anything useful, and she doesn't want to go back to Tatooine.

When they're inside, Obi-Wan motions for her to sit on the couch. He's silent for a moment, and Ahsoka desperately wonders if he's trying to find the right punishment. Will he –? No. No, of course not. He's a Jedi. Jedi are good. They won't beat children... right? But she was bad, so maybe she would deserve it.

"Ahsoka, look at me." Obi-Wan's voice is quiet but firm. Almost against her will, she looks up at his blue-gray eyes which don't hold even a shred of anger. Yes, he's clearly frustrated, but he's not angry. That's – that's good, at least. It means she didn't mess up too badly.

"As Jedi, we must learn to control our feelings," he explains. "We can't get angry and hit someone for saying something we don't like. People will always try to irritate us, but instead of lashing out, we have to let go of our anger and try to understand them better. I know you're struggling to adjust to life at the Temple, and I'm here to help you. I can't do that if I don't know what's wrong. Next time something like this happens, just tell me, and I can talk to the other masters. Bullying shouldn't exist among Jedi, but it's an unfortunate reality."

"Okay, Master," she whispers, sinking further into the couch's cushions. "I will." She keeps her expression as blank as possible to hide the confusion she's feeling. Obi-Wan just doesn't understand, and she has no idea how to express her emotions. She needs to "let them go" whatever that means. Well, at least he's not too angry at her. This time.

**w**

"How is this, Master?" ten-year-old Ahsoka asks, looking up at her master.

Obi-Wan glances over at her. She's managed to balance the pile of rocks in an inverse pyramid.

"Very good, Ahsoka," he complements, "Now see if you can hold it in place for the rest of the session."

As he continues his meditating, his mind wanders to his padawan. Ahsoka is continuing to excel at her training. Despite her very late start, she's doing a surprisingly good job catching up. She's a padawan that would make any master proud, when she's actually listening, that is. So why does he feel so... uneasy about it? It's true that he never expected to take a padawan of his own so soon, and thought that when he did, he'd have Qui-Gon to turn to for advice. If circumstances were different –

His thoughts are interrupted by someone calling him from the doorway to the room. "Master Kenobi?"

"Hello, Master Tosan," he greets the Zygerrian, "How can I help you?"

"The Jedi Council has another mission for you."

He stands up, going to take the datapad from the Jedi Master, scanning over his new assignment. "An archeology team believes that they've discovered an ancient Jedi holocron?"

"Yes," Tosan confirms, "Yes, on the planet Dellanor, in the Mid-Rim. It's not a Republic world, but the archeology team comprises Republic citizens -"

The rock that Ahsoka was balancing scatter across the floor as she turns her attention to their conversation. "You're leaving again?" she demands, obviously not terribly happy.

"I shouldn't be gone for long," Obi-Wan attempts to reassure her, "And you can continue your training with Master Yoda." He hands the datapad back to Tosan who exits the room.

"I'm already way ahead of the other younglings!" she insists.

"Perhaps," he agrees, "But it's not up to the student to determine training." She scowls and looks away, gathering up the rocks she'd dropped earlier. Somehow, he still gets the feeling he's disappointing her as a master. He's not sure what to do differently.

Not long later, Obi-Wan finds himself in the archives to start researching the planet. Master Yoda walks over to him, inquiring on his research.

"Take young Tano on this quest, will you?" Yoda inquires finally.

"I hadn't planned on it. I'm not sure she's ready."

"Unsure you are. Ready or not ready. And so, behind she remains. Behind the other padawans." The Grandmaster seems displeased that he doesn't want to take Ahsoka into a situation which could be risky.

"She understands she came to us far later than any of the other Initiates, that she still has much to learn on her path to becoming a Jedi," the Knight asserts.

"True, this is. But her master's belief in her, she also needs." It's weird how the only member of the Council who seems extra concerned with how Ahsoka is doing is Yoda. It's something that he's never quite understood.

"Forgive me for my bluntness, Master Yoda, but your support of Ahsoka is surprising," Obi-Wan declares, "You were one of the Council members who was against her becoming a padawan in the first place."

"Very dangerous, a poorly trained Jedi is," Yoda responds, "To others and to herself. If train her you must, young Kenobi, train her well."

The conversation ends at that and Yoda walks off. Maybe Obi-Wan should take Ahsoka along with him on this, after all. It shouldn't be too difficult, not beyond something she could handle.

The Togruta is more elated than he expected when she hears that he's planning to take her. "Thanks for bringing me with you, Master," she grins, staring out the cockpit viewport of the ship as they speed upwards into space.

"Of course, Ahsoka," Obi-Wan replies, "Master Yoda agreed it was time, and there is no Jedi on the Council wiser than he."

She nods gratefully, leaning forwards to watch the view. Yoda was right. She shouldn't stay at the Temple all the time. He can't train her like a normal padawan. Her path is the not the same as his was, and he isn't the same kind of teacher as Qui-Gon.

"Master Obi-Wan?" Ahsoka asks as they watch the passing blue-white blurs of hyperspace.

"What is it, Ahsoka?"

"I was just wondering... what was your life like before you became a Jedi?"

"Well, I can't say I really remember. I was very young when I left my home world. I was identified as Force-sensitive and taken to the Temple on Coruscant," he replies.

"You've always been a Jedi then," Ahsoka mutters.

"Well, no, I had to go through all of the training that you are now," he points out, "Remember, I was still a padawan when we met."

"I know, but you always knew what your path was, that you were meant to be a Jedi." Ahsoka looks away, staring out the windows. "You were never a slave or anything else like that. Maybe that's why the Council said I was too old to start training."

Obi-Wan rests a hand on her shoulder comfortingly. "The Council is right about many things, but they are not perfect. Qui-Gon Jinn chose you to be his student, just as he chose me."

Ahsoka jumps up, and he senses her anger sparking. "But he died. So, you got stuck with me." She spins around and stalks out of the room.

"Ahsoka! That's not –" he begins, but the door to the main hold slides closed behind her, cutting off his words. He stares after her, a sigh escaping him. That was not what he meant.

An orange Togruta is waiting to greet them when they arrive on the planet. She takes them to the location of the holocron, explaining how nearby pirates have been trying to steal their findings, assuming it has some value.

"Then by all means, let us relieve you of your burden," Obi-Wan declares, before turning to his padawan. "Ahsoka, Mistress Clautiffe seems quite concerned about the pirates. Why don't you help keep watch while I verify that the artifact is, in fact, a holocron?"

"Yes, Master!" she exclaims eagerly, and takes off.

No sooner has he received the holocron, than he hears Ahsoka calling him. "Master Obi-Wan! The pirates are here! They must have seen us land!"

"I suggest you stay here," Obi-Wan advises Clautiffe, "We'll handle this."

"Hello there," he greets, as he steps outside to a see group of locals approaching them, obviously ready for a fight.

"What do I tell you, my pet?" scoffs one of the pirates, "More offworlders. And they would only come here if there was something of value to be found."

"I am Obi-Wan Kenobi, a Knight of the Jedi Order," Obi-Wan introduces, "And I assure you it is only historical interest that has brought me and my apprentice to your world."

"Hudso Shakli, leader of the Krypder riders," retorts the pirate, "We will happily retrieve our world's property from your dead bodies."

"Our intentions on your planet are purely peaceful," declares Obi-Wan, slipping his lightsaber out from under his robes. He's quite certain this is not going to end peacefully. The pirates are obviously determined to get the holocron. "But that doesn't mean we won't defend ourselves," he finishes, activating the blade.

A gleam enters the pirate leader's eyes. "Forget whatever they dug out of the ground. The laser sword, that's what I want!" The leader steps aside and the other pirates charge forwards, brandishing knives and other weapons.

"Ahsoka, stay behind me," Obi-Wan warns. The pirates start shooting, and he moves to deflect their shots, attacking them in return.

He finishes disarming the last of the pirates and turns to see the leader holding onto Ahsoka, a knife pressed up against her neck. "A trade then," the pirate offers gleefully, "Your sword for the child."

Obi-Wan freezes, knowing that he'll never be able to act fast enough to pull the knife away to prevent Ahsoka from being killed or seriously injured. He can feel her panic and fear in the Force, though she's struggling to push them to the side. He can't let the pirates get his lightsaber, but he can't let any harm come to his padawan either. Over the past many months, he's come to care for her deeply, the attachment one more proof that he's not the master he needs to be.

"You don't want to do this," Obi-Wan warns.

"But I do," he insists, "I want the weapon. I want to know how to –"

A bunch of rocks strike him hard in the back of the head – courtesy of Ahsoka – and with a startled exclamation, he drops the knife. Ahsoka yanks free, darting over to Obi-Wan.

"What on Danellenor," splutters one of the other pirates, scrambling to pick up his own lost knife. Several of the others are getting back to their feet as well, preparing to fight again.

"Now you can gather your comrades and leave this camp in peace," Obi-Wan warns, "Or my apprentice can continue her training." The pirates slowly step aside, allowing them to return to their ship, undisturbed.

Ahsoka is sitting in the cockpit when Obi-Wan arrives, a downcast expression on her face. "I'm sorry, Master," she murmurs.

"You handled yourself admirably, Ahsoka. You have nothing to apologize for," he assures her.

"I froze up and let myself get caught," she sighs, "I thought I was ready to come with you, but I wasn't."

"You were ready long before today, Ahsoka," Obi-Wan says, sitting down next to her, "I'm the one who wasn't ready." He pauses for a moment. Really, he should clear up the misunderstanding from before. "What you said earlier about me being stuck with you as an apprentice? I suppose I felt it was you who's stuck with me as a teacher." Qui-Gon was one of the best Jedi, and he fell to the Sith. He wasn't able to save him, so how could he expect himself to properly train a padawan? Especially one who'd had a life like Ahsoka did?

"Then I guess we're stuck with each other," she offers with a smirk. He decides to leave it at that.

**w**

Ahsoka steps alone into the towering ice structure on Ilum. It's finally time for her to get her first lightsaber crystal, and she can't deny feeling nervous. She doesn't even know where to go in here.

The Force. Use the Force. Right.

She silently moves across the ice. She can feel something calling to her as she slowly makes her way through the winding tunnels. Hopefully coming out will be easier. Finally, she reaches a larger, more open area, where the pull feels the strongest.

As she turns around in search of the crystal, a figure suddenly steps around the corner. She recognizes him instantly. The Sith who killed Qui-Gon. Ahsoka was alone in here. She was! And he was dead, so how is he here?! She scrambles back with a startled gasp.

A gleam enters the Zabrak's yellow eyes as he withdraws and activates his lightsaber. Ahsoka steps backwards again, reaching for her training lightsaber. She'll never be able to defeat him, but she can't call Obi-Wan on time either. She can't leave without her crystal.

The Sith spins his lightsaber, lunging forwards. She hastily blocks the first blow, stumbling back a step from the force of it. The blade arches down, cutting at her, and again she parries it. She hasn't had much training with a lightsaber, but she's been progressing as fast in that as everything else. Still, that won't do much against a fully trained Sith Lord. Their lightsabers clash a few more times before Maul sends her blade flying from her hands.

"Kenobi," the Sith growls suddenly, lunging past her. She whirls around to see Obi-Wan standing in the doorway.

"You're a failure," her master snaps, "Useless. Pathetic. Why did I ever take you as a padawan?"

For a moment she can only gape at him. Is that really what he thinks of her? Did that never change? Not even now? She tries so, so hard, but why is it never enough? She wasn't ever anything more than a promise to him. He didn't want her. No one did, no one except her mother and Kitster, who she left.

Obi-Wan activates his lightsaber as Maul attacks him. The red and blue blades clash incessantly as the two fight.

Tears sting her eyes as she watches, unable to do anything. Even now, she can't bear to just stand by and let her master die. She can't but getting close would be suicide. Useless... No, she needs to help. Reaching out, she tries to use the Force to call her training lightsaber back to her hand. It's a good distance away and on the other side of the fight, but she has to try. The fight is escalating and Obi-Wan is losing. The lightsaber trembles but doesn't move. Pathetic... Come on! She's the Chosen One! She can do this!

Her fear is getting to her, slowing her down, but Ahsoka closes her eyes and throws her full focus into it. The cold metal hilt finally lands in her hands and she starts running forwards. Except she doesn't get there until too late. Obi-Wan moves a moment too slow, and the ruby blade impales him through the chest. He collapses to the floor and Maul turns to look at her, a smirk on his face.

Shock and horror don't even begin to encompass what Ahsoka is feeling. Her master is dead, he's just gone, and she couldn't even stop it... Useless... She's supposed to be the Chosen One, but what good does any of that do when she can't even save the only person she has left?

But at the very least, maybe she can still stop his killer from escaping. She lunges forwards, anger spiking to a whole new level. "You will never be a true Jedi. You'll never be able to get rid of the darkness in you," Maul taunts. She swings her blade at him, and it passes straight through him before the figure promptly vanishes as though it was never there.

What?! She spins around only to see that Obi-Wan's body has disappeared as well and she's all alone again. A vision. It was all just a vision.

Ahsoka takes a few moments to recollect herself before two shimmering green crystals catch her attention. Two? Why are there two of them? Both of them are calling to her, though. For whatever reason, she's supposed to take both.

She crosses the icy floor, retrieving them before turning and hurrying out to find her master.