Eddy sprawled out on Eddward's bed with his arms spread wide. He kicked his feet up onto the wall to Eddward's dismay, but he let his friend be. On the opposite side of the room Eddward sat at his desk typing away on his laptop. Summer was coming to an end and he wanted to get a head start on his college essays. There were three colleges in particular he was applying to, but only one he truly wished to go to, the University of California, Berkeley. Ever since his childhood days of building contraptions he was engrossed with the idea of creating to better the world. This university had an amazing robotics program and he was hoping on getting early admittance. Behind him, he heard Eddy sigh... again.
"Fuck, Sockhead. What do I do?" His friend asked clearly exasperated.
Eddward quickly hit the save icon and shut his computer. He couldn't focus with all of Eddy's whining and he wouldn't allow his work to suffer from the distraction. Eddward had his own problems to deal with at the moment which didn't leave much room to care about Eddy's predicament. But for the sake of his friend's wellbeing he offered what little advice he had no matter how blunt it was.
"Just tell Nazz how you feel Eddy, it's as simple as that," came Eddward's blatant response.
Eddy grumbled and rolled over pressing his face into Eddward's mattress. Eddward was glad Eddy had previously removed his shoes or he would have scuffed his walls. Eddward rested his arm on his desk and stared at his friend with mock concern. Eddy had indeed changed since he became serious about Nazz. In the past Eddy always put himself first. It was always what was best for Eddy and nothing else mattered, but now everything was different.
Eddy was worried that when school started again everyone would judge Nazz for dating him. Nazz was popular among her peers and Eddy was... well he was Eddy. He didn't want Nazz to turn into a social outcast during her final year of high school, so he decided that their relationship had to remain a secret. She'd agreed to the arrangement if only to make him happy, but now she wanted to out their relationship tonight at her party in front of all the cul-de-sac kids. Eddy was mortified.
"How long?" came Eddy's mumbled words.
"Speak up, Eddy."
Eddy raised his face from the bed, "how much longer until the party starts?"
Eddward turned and grabbed his phone to check the time, "approximately one hour, but you should arrive early."
"What? Why?" Eddy sputtered.
Eddward rolled his eyes as he leaned back in his chair. "You're her boyfriend Eddy, be punctual. Did it ever occur to you that she may require help setting up?"
Eddy sighed and sat up. His eyes were cast down toward the floor. His cheeks flared red as he spoke, "Kevin's already there helping her." He said and then jumped down so he could pace the floor. Shouting and throwing his hands up for emphasis in a sudden burst of outrage. "Of everyone in the damn cul-de-sac she just had to be 'bffs' with Kevin. She couldn't pick Jimmy or Plank, no it had to be Jockstrap. He pisses me off."
Eddward smiled and turned his face to the side at the mention of the red head. He'd seen Kevin the night he found out his abductors were set to be released in the near future. They were supposed to go to the gym the next day, but he hadn't seen Kevin since. Well actually he had, but something was off. The morning after he'd had his nightmare and then contacted Marie he saw Kevin briefly when he was parting ways with the bluenette. When they reached his house Eddward was still in a dark place inside his head.
Usually talking to Marie quelled his urge to take other drastic measures, but this time not even she could help. She must have sensed his unease because before he entered his house she had grabbed him tightly and cried into his back.
"Please don't. Don't do it. I know you still do and you only call me when you know you won't be able to stop. I can't imagine losing you to this. I need you Eddward."
The force behind her words hit him hard and he stiffened at first, but then eased into the awkward embrace. She had touched him and he had turned to assure her that he would not cut and he would call her if such urges arose again. An unknown force had told him to look up and when he did he was met with Kevin glaring back at him from his garage across the street. Eddward involuntarily squeezed Marie tighter and she reached up to kiss his cheek. Eddward couldn't break his eyes away from Kevin though.
His cold hard stare tore deep into him and he suddenly felt like he was in the wrong for holding Marie in such a way. Kevin and he were acquaintances if anything and nothing more so those thoughts should not have infiltrated his mind. Although there was something about that stare. He looked... jealous? No, now that was impossible.
Still even after Marie had parted and made her way to the car, Eddward couldn't bring himself to look away from Kevin's murderous stance until Kevin shut his garage door breaking the view. Before he had time to rationalize his thoughts he had a short tempered Eddy standing in front of him.
"The fuck you smilin' about Dee? You think its funny Kevin's over there tryin' to woo my girl?"
Eddward arched an eyebrow at Eddy's particular choice of words. "Woo? Seriously Eddy?" He shook his head and extended his arm to push Eddy out of his personal space. Once Eddy was at a sufficient distance he spoke again, "Do you honestly think Nazz would deceive you in such a way?"
To that Eddy huffed and turned away knowing that Eddward was right. He grabbed his keys and wallet off Eddward's bedside table as he made his way to the door. "What time you gunna be there at?" he asked quickly.
Eddward lost eye contact at the question as he turned back to his laptop and opened it, determined to finish his essay, "I was not planning on attending. Do give Nazz my regards."
"Dee, you have to be there. I need you!" Eddy yelled as he lunged forward towards Eddward and roughly shook his shoulders.
Eddward turned in his seat at the abrupt force and glared at him, "I don't do parties, Eddy. You know this," he deadpanned.
"Come on Dee," Eddy insisted and looked Eddward in the eye, "please, I know it's not your thing since- ya know, but this is different."
Eddward turned his chair away from Eddy and went back to his writing. A cold chill ran up his spine and settled at the base of his neck causing him to shiver. Eddy shook his head and mumbled as he started towards Eddward's bedroom door.
Eddward swallowed before he spoke again, "if I finish my essay in a timely fashion I may stop by for a short expanse of time."
Eddy smiled and said nothing as he left, shutting the door behind him. Eddward shut his computer and laid his head on top of it. He wouldn't be able to continue writing now. His heart started pounding as images of his past flashed before his eyes. Parties never ended well for him. The Eds were always made fun of in some way or another and the last party he attended had been two years ago when everything changed.
His fingers were twitching and his breath came in staggered pants as he tried to regain an ounce of composure. He needed to remain calm, but his skin was crawling, it was as if his old ant farm had been cracked open and the ants were free to roam his skin. It had been a little over a week since he had last cut, but the allure of a fresh mark was tugging at him. He lifted his left wrist and pushed his sweater up so he could gaze upon his work. Neat lines scarred his flesh in a parallel fashion. He pressed his fingertips to the now nearly healed skin and wished for a moment a trickle of blood would appear.
He had to smile at the thought of his old self and how he was once squeamish at the mere thought of blood. His parents wanted him to be a doctor and he could hardly fathom the thought of cutting into flesh back then, but now. Now he reveled in the feel of a fresh cut. That single serene moment when a precise line was pressed elegantly into his skin. Almost like a branding of everything he had overcome. Every line told its own story and the book had far more chapters to come. Just thinking of the pleasure a cut would bring him was enough to settle his heightened nerves this time. There was an art to his cuts and he had to remain patient until the time arose. The timing had to be right along with placement. If he cut too close to a fresh cut he didn't think he would possess the willpower to stop. He had to remain in control of the pain. It wasn't time yet, he had to wait.
He grabbed his head phones from the bedside table and plugged them into his mp3 player. Some soothing piano music from his favorite composer, Baroque sounded absolutely lovely to him right now.
Nearly an hour later he had drifted into a peaceful almost meditative state. Out of curiosity he checked his phone for the time and sighed at the increasing amount of text messages from an extremely, angry Eddy. Apparently the party had started an hour early and Eddward was the only one yet to be present and accounted for. He shut off his music and shoved the device in his pocket while he cradled his head in his other hand. He just didn't want to go. The insistent chime of his text tone was becoming a constant pattern and Eddward groaned as he reached for his phone.
'I'm still writing.' He lied as he typed away his quick response.
'Fuck off Dee I asked Nazz 2 wait 4 u come on already.'
Eddward sighed as he stood up. He wished he hadn't told Eddy that he might go. Saying maybe always meant yes to Eddy.
'Very well. I will be there shortly.'
Eddward reluctantly made his way down the stairs and shoved his feet into his shoes. He zipped up his sweater and pulled the hood up over his head covering his hat in the process. He reached into his pocket, double checking that he had his mp3 player and headphones. The things he endured to keep up a social standing for his friends. Before he left he gave himself a quick once-over in the mirror and read the sticky note on the side for good measure.
"It's okay not to be okay." He said and then looked back to the mirror, "if you say that enough times, Eddward maybe one day you'll actually fool yourself into believing it."
He shut his lights off and locked the door behind himself as he walked to Nazz's house. It was right around the corner and he could already hear the blazing music coming from within the house. He cringed as he approached the door and knocked three times in perfect unison.
He waited a moment and then knocked again. Once again he was met with noise from the other side of the door and no one answered. He sighed as he reached for the handle and turned it gently. It clicked open and he made a grunt of annoyance. He hated his manners at times like these. Even though he was invited he found it rude to just invade another person's house without a direct invitation from the host at the time of arrival.
He slowly opened the door and let himself inside and then shut it quietly behind him. The enticing aroma of pepperoni pizza wafted through the air followed by the stench of alcohol. Eddward gagged slightly and then made his way into the living room. Jimmy and Sarah were sitting on the floor eating and laughing amongst themselves. On the other side of the room Ed was dancing with a... was that one of Rolf's chickens? Eddward laughed to himself at the sight. A hand slapped him hard on the back and he turned to see Eddy at his side, a beer in his hand. Eddward furrowed his brows. He despised alcohol.
"Took ya long enough, Sockhead." Eddy said as he took a sip.
"Yes, well I am here now. Where is everyone else?" He inquired as he looked around the room.
Eddy took another long sip before answering, "Kevin, Rolf, and Johnny started doing shots in the kitchen. Nazz is keeping score."
"I'm surprised you weren't up for the challenge, Eddy" Eddward stated as he turned his attention fully to his friend.
"Pffft, last thing I need is to get into another competition with Kevin. I'm just avoiding him at this point."
Eddward smiled as he wrapped an arm around Eddy playfully, "I'm proud of you Eddy. The things you'll do for love."
This comment earned him a hard smack and a shove from Eddy. "Fuck you, Dee!" Eddy cried out as his cheeks turned an unsightly shade of pink.
Eddward laughed as he steadied himself. Perhaps this party wouldn't be so bad after all.
"Edd!"
Eddward turned his attention to the feminine voice which called to him. Nazz was approaching with a drink in her hand.
"I'm glad you could make it." She said enthusiastically.
"Thank you for inviting me," Eddward quipped in return, "I apologize for my tardiness, I was otherwise preoccupied with a college essay and seemingly lost track of time." He said. It wasn't the whole truth, but he didn't like the fact that they were waiting for him to arrive.
"No worries, dude!" Nazz beamed at him, "I totally get it. I'm trying so hard to get early acceptance at PCU*. These deadlines are no joke."
"I'm sure you've nothing to worry about Nazz, you've always been punctual and timely when completing assignments." Eddward answered.
"Blah blah blah," Eddy chimed in, "You two done with college talk. Come on Nazz, just make your stupid announcements."
Nazz made a face at him, but refused to let his mood bring her down, "Eddy, said I couldn't say anyting until you were here." Nazz said as she leaned in close to Eddy and kissed him on the cheek.
Eddy's blush spread rapidly as he put his arm around her, "just tell'em already."
"Please begin." Eddward said as he ducked out of the way.
Nazz giggled, as she grabbed at Eddy's fingers which rested over her shoulder with her free hand. She raised her voice above the music, "hey, can I have everyone's attention!" She called out.
As if on cue, Jimmy stood and ran to the stereo to turn it down. Nazz flashed him a smile as thanks. Kevin, Rolf, and Johnny emerged from the depths of the kitchen shoving each other and stood in the door frame. Edd looked up briefly and his eyes met Kevin's. Kevin smiled and Edd was taken aback for a moment. Why? He wasn't really sure himself. He quickly averted his gaze as Nazz spoke up again.
"First off, I just wanted to thank you all for coming. For some of us this is our last summer before college and I wanted us to enjoy what we have left, ya know?" A few cheers came from the boys standing at the kitchen doorway. "Also this goes without saying, but Sarah and Jimmy, no alcohol for you. You're too young and I'm not explaining that to your parents." Nazz smiled as she turned to Eddy, "okay and the last announcement for the night," Nazz leaned in and kissed Eddy on the cheek, "Eddy and I are dating and I couldn't be happier." She exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around him.
A few cheers were made and surprisingly enough Kevin started a clap which everyone soon joined in on. Eddy blushed feverishly throughout the whole ordeal, but his arm never left Nazz's side.
"Let's party!" she called out and the festivities continued.
After the announcements were made and everyone started mingling again, Eddward made his way over to one of Nazz's love seat couches and cushioned himself on one side. Nazz had come over and offered him a drink, but he refused to which she merely brought him water and he was grateful for it. Once he was comfortable he put his headphones in and drowned the whole room out as he contemplated his thoughts.
The party continued on and a few times Eddward paused his music when Ed wandered over to show him a new dance move. It was enticing how simple minded Ed could be sometimes. The party went on all around him and eventually Jimmy and Sarah went home. Truthfully, Eddward wanted nothing more than to return home, but he wanted to stay and make a point, he wouldn't be one of the first people to leave for once.
Across the house Nazz had pulled Kevin off into her bedroom to talk. By this time it was safe to say Kevin was on the border of being wasted with just a tad bit of coherency remaining. Nazz planned on using this to her full advantage.
"Geez Nazz, why'd ya pull me in here s'fast? Room won't stop spinnin' now," Kevin complained as he steadied himself against the wall.
"I asked you to talk to Edd and you never did, now's the perfect time."
"The fuck it is. I can't talk to him like this," he said and gestured to all of himself, "I'll make a fool of maself if anythin'."
Nazz stubbornly crossed her arms, "I never thought I'd live to see the day when Kevin Barr was afraid to talk to Double Dee."
To this Kevin puffed out his chest slightly, "I'm not scared of no one!" That was most definitely the alcohol talking. He was indeed afraid.
"Then prove it. Go talk to him."
"Maybe I will!" Kevin exclaimed as he left the room and marched to the living room leaving a grinning Nazz behind him.
He could do this. He was Kevin Barr. In the past he could make Double Dee tremble just by looking at him. Kevin gulped as he approached the living room. It was funny how things had been reversed. He stood in the door frame just out of sight as his eyes fell on Eddward. He was sitting in the love seat in the corner with his head propped up on his hand. His eyes were closed and he almost appeared to be sleeping. Kevin took a deep breath and then exhaled. He went to take a step into the living room and took one more deep breath for good measure, you know. Just in case the first one wasn't enough.
As he approached the love seat his mind drew a blank. Luckily he still had a beer in his hand to give him something to do while he pondered over what to say. From his position he cast a shadow over Edd at just the right angle to make him pause his mp3 player and look up. A distinct range of emotions splayed over his face starting with annoyed, then moving to... was he blushing? Kevin smiled; he so had this in the bag.
"Sup Edd?" He asked nonchalantly.
"Greetings Kevin, you seem to be enjoying yourself this evening."
Kevin smiled as he used his beer to motion to the empty space beside Edd. "Can I sit?"
"May I sit," Eddward absently corrected.
Kevin smiled at this as he sat down. "Same old Double Dee," he said and then instantly regretted it. He looked over to Edd who now looked furious at the use of the dead nickname. Kevin could see a vein pulsing in his neck and he gulped as he waited to be reprimanded.
"Please refrain from calling me that for the duration of my existence," came his monotone response.
"Shit, sorry," he said as he rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. In his nearly drunken state he was struck with a brilliant Kevin Barr idea and he extended his arm behind Eddward as he continued to talk as if nothing had happened. He paid close attention to Eddward's reaction. He instantly stiffened a bit, but he never flinched away or addressed the sudden proximity. A slight pink colored his cheeks and Kevin couldn't help, but smile at this. "So anyway, where ya been? I haven't seen you at the gym recently."
In all honesty this was a pointless question to ask because Kevin had been avoiding Eddward ever since he declared to himself that he liked Edd. Eddward always had a schedule and a plan. Kevin already knew the days when Eddward went to the gym. He was rarely there on a day that wasn't on his schedule, but when he was, there was certain vigor in his routine. When they had first started meeting at the gym it was purely coincidence until Kevin picked up on the schedule. The last week he went when he knew Eddward had already been. If it wasn't for the alcohol pumping through his veins now he doubted they would be having this conversation.
"I've been a few time, but as of recently I am preoccupied with college essays. I plan on resuming my normal routine once school begins," came Eddward's calculated and precise answer.
Leave it to the nerd to always be punctual, even at a party.
"Next time you go let me know. We can go together." Kevin said being very forward, if Eddward was a girl he was sure he would be getting laid tonight, but Eddward was not a girl, nor was it ever going to be that easy.
Eddward's lips twitched into a small side smile and Kevin was almost positive he could see goose bumps forming on the back of his neck, "Okay," was all he said.
Down to one worded answers. Kevin tried to think of something... anything to keep the conversation going. He finished the rest of his beer hastily and saw Eddward's face scrunch up in distaste out of the corner of his eye. Once Kevin finished he sat the empty bottle down on the side table and turned to look at Edd.
"You don't drink at all do you?"
Eddward straightened up and Kevin pulled his arm back just enough so Eddward could adjust his position before his arm crept in closer. His arm still lingered on the back of the couch, but if he moved it an inch closer he would be touching Edd. So close.
"I do not partake in the consumption of alcohol for my own reasons. I don't comprehend the point in consuming a beverage that will prohibit my better judgment and purposely decrease my reflexes,"
"Damn Double- I mean- shit, Edd," Kevin turned as he tried to think of something else to say, this conversation was no longer working in his favor.
"You can call me, Dee if you prefer. I'm aware Double Dee comes more naturally to most people, but please, just Dee will suffice."
Kevin smiled, "Okay, Dee."
"Double Dee!" Ed shouted as he ran over with Rolf's chicken under his arm, "look I can dance like a chicken too." Ed proclaimed as he held onto Gertrude with one arm and flapped his other while mumbling, "cluck, cluck."
Eddward laughed at this and shifted slightly in his seat which caused Kevin's arm to fall around his shoulders. Eddward instantly stiffened at the sudden contact and Kevin was sure he spiked a fever from how red his face was. Kevin had to think fast. If he didn't do something this moment would end and he was sure they wouldn't have another. He couldn't imagine another time when they would both be sitting on a love seat together.
Kevin looked to Edd, "why does he get to call you Double Dee? You yelled at me." He said exasperated.
Eddward looked to Kevin dumbfounded. Kevin waited for the answer that would follow such a look. His arm was still around Eddward's shoulders and he was happy he hadn't tried to remove it.
"It's Ed," was all he said at first, but Kevin quirked an eyebrow waiting for more of an explanation. Eddward sighed and looked away refusing to meet his stare. "After what happened, Ed couldn't comprehend why I changed. Everyone else understood for the most part, but telling Ed that Double Dee was no more was never an option. Just because one person is broken it shouldn't affect the lives of everyone."
Kevin sat back in a stunned silence. This was as open as Eddward had ever been with him. Not that they ever shared a moment in the past where this was possible. For the first time Kevin saw Eddward in a new light and it made him all the more curious.
"For what it's worth, I quit the baseball team after what happened to you," Kevin admitted, "I know I was a bully in the past, but what he did was wrong. I know he was jailed for it, but still. It didn't feel right being surrounded by his friends after that."
A warm smile caressed Eddward's lips at the honesty Kevin displayed. "I thank you for that, though it was hardly necessary. There was no reason for you to quit because of someone else's actions."
"Yeah, but still." Kevin smiled and Eddward continued to blush.
To the side he heard Rolf and Johnny talking as they were getting ready to leave for the night. Rolf approached Ed and demanded his chicken be returned to which Ed frowned. Rolf sighed and told Ed he could walk back to Rolf's farm to return Gertrude and that he could see her another time. Ed bounded to the door yelling his goodbyes to Eddward and the three of them left. Something suddenly changed in Eddward. Kevin wasn't exactly sure what it was, but Eddward lost the warm inviting aroma and became withdrawn. He turned away to grab his phone off the side table.
"I should be leaving now," Eddward said.
Kevin frowned, but quickly regained his composure. "I'll walk ya,"
Eddward made an annoyed face at this, "I am perfectly capable of walking a few yards across the street, Kevin."
"I'm heading home anyway."
Truthfully he wanted to stay and talk to Edd for as long as possible, but if leaving now gave him the chance to spend a few more moments with him then he would take it. The opportunity might never arise again. Eddward headed to the door and Kevin went off to tell Nazz goodbye. As he approached her door he heard noises coming from the other side which he wished he hadn't and then decided against it. He met Eddward at the entrance of the house with a red blush on his face. Eddward titled his head slightly at Kevin's disheveled look.
"You don't even wanna know what I just heard. I'm never gunna get used to the two of them dating."
Eddward snorted at the statement and turned to exit the house with Kevin following closely behind. Once they stepped out into the brisk night air Eddward readjusted the hood on his sweater and shoved his hands in his pockets. Kevin walked beside him in companionable, yet awkward silence. The walk was short and there wasn't room for much to be said. Kevin had at least talked to him, but he still craved something more, like the promise of more time. Once they finally reached the center of the street which separated their homes Kevin turned to Edd and was about to speak, but Eddward beat him too it.
"I enjoyed our talk tonight Kevin, I thank you for the company."
"Don't mention it," he answered as he rubbed at the back of his reddening neck. This alcohol was kicking his ass, he would never be this forward with Edd, "we should hang sometime... like outside of the gym."
Edd seemed to ponder the sudden invitation of friendship for a moment. He looked like he was about to shut down the proposal altogether, but a warmth spread in his cheeks and he smiled slightly. "That would be acceptable. Another time then, Kevin." He said as he turned and walked the rest of the way to his house.
He never once looked back and Kevin was okay with that. He had done it. He talked to Eddward and now they were... sort of, almost, hopefully going to become friends in the possible future? Kevin smiled to himself as he finally turned and trudged up his front porch steps and tried to turn the handle...
Locked.
Kevin reached into his pocket for keys that he abruptly remembered were sitting on his dresser in his bedroom. He looked down willing the door to magically unlock, but it worked to no avail. His parents were gone and wouldn't be back until morning. He felt the beginning of a headache starting to become clear in his head and he shivered as a cold breeze swept by him. He turned and looked across the street to Eddward's house. A room was illuminated on the second floor and he figured that was Eddward's bedroom. He exhaled through his nose as he crossed the street to Eddward's house and rang the buzzer. He waited patiently until he heard footsteps approaching on the opposite side of the door.
When the door was opened Eddward stood there in a pair of loose fitting sweatpants that hung dangerously low off his hips. He was wearing a tight fitting black shirt and his beanie was present like always atop his head. He gave a small smirk at Kevin's arrival at his door.
"When you asked to hang out at another point in time I wasn't aware you meant tonight."
Kevin refused to blush, but he knew he was. Kevin normally didn't do "embarrassed," but right now he had no choice in the matter.
"I'm locked out. Can I stay here for the night?"
Eddward made a grunt of annoyance and looked down the street to Nazz's house. Kevin followed his stare and threw up his hands in surrender as he realized what Eddward was probably going to say.
"I can't go back to Nazz's house. They're... I don't even wanna think of what they're doing," he shuddered at the thought. "You wouldn't make me do that would you?" He almost begged.
Eddward laughed at this, "no I suppose not," and opened the door a little further, "very well, you may come in." He said as Kevin entered his home.
Kevin gulped as he made his way past Eddward. This was progressing faster than he had originally anticipated.
PCU =Peach Creek University
-LunaMaye