I'm back!

First I would like to thank all my readers for the incredible support you have shown me since I started writing this!

In A03 someone pointed out that Clarke was able to survive months alone in the woods thus it didn't make sense that she couldn't so something as basic as lit fire (chap 12) ... I hope you like my explanation :)

I would like to encourage everyone to leave suggestions for the story and point out any inconsistencies or mistakes, I will try to came up with a plausible explanation for whatever choice I made.

Before I forget... The full quote that inspired the tittle is "We define family in many different ways: not just by blood but by people with whom we find a common ground and a common bond." ~ Adrienne C. Moore (American actress. Best known for her role as Cindy Hayes in Orange Is the New Black)

Clarke could not help but laugh when Murphy dropped down with a loud thump, a string of profanities flowing freely from his lips.

"Just so you know if I could get up without my legs giving up I would run away from you, you are a fucking psycho"

"You are doing great Murphy!"

John simply rolled his eyes at her and turned his head to the equality exhausted Octavia and Wells.

"Why do we subject ourselves to this torture?"

"Because Clarke said so"

"Because Clarke said so" John mockingly repeated Well's words "I will tell you why… because we are fucking pushovers, that's why"

"Exercise will help you…"

"Yeah, yeah, I already bought your benefits speech Blondie, no need to remind me I'm whipped"

Octavia snorted but nodded along, there was no way to deny Clarke hold the reins in their little band of misfits. If the blonde said jump, they only asked, how high?. In their only free day, they had woken up at the crack of dawn to exercise, of all things, if that didn't scream whipped nothing else would.

"One more and we are done"

"Thank God! I thought I was gonna die!" Octavia's dramatic proclamation was met with a chorus of approval from the others.

Murphy drank greedily from his cup of water and sprayed some on his head, rolling a little to find a comfortable position to rest. Every muscle he never knew he had in his body was hurting; he was not going to make the effort to walk.

"You guys are doing great; we should start thinking about adding some extra weight"

"You can't be serious" Octavia shouted in disbelief.

"You are fucking serious" Murphy stated, his eyes as big as saucers. Was she trying to kill them?

"Do you hate us that much Clarke?" Wells said wheezing, out of the three of them he was the least in shape.

"Just a little bit of weight" Clarke turned to Wells, her voice had gone a few octaves deeper, conveying the seriousness of her answer "Of course I don't hate any of you, you are my best friends".

The blonde knew they had been joking but the fact that she got to call them friends would never cease to amaze Clarke and she wanted to remind them how much she loved them at any opportunity she got.

"Could have fooled me blondie"

"You will thank me one day Murphy"

"I understand how important it is for us but never expect me to thank you for this torture"

"Fair enough"

The sun was already setting when they started to jog back to camp, Clarke was taking the lead and the other three were a few paces behind. Their daily conditioning was proving useful with keeping up with her, not that they would tell Clarke that, she would only see it as a challenge to push them harder.

Clarke looked at her friends regaling Charlotte, and a few other curious onlookers, with stories about their training. Their battered looks had attracted quite a crowd and many were intrigued enough to ask if they could join what most delinquents had started to call Clarke's elite team. The nickname may have started as a joke but now, seeing the physical changes it brought, it was whispered with reverence and awe.

The delinquents had slowly but surely started to accept a shift in their mentality, while fitness had not been regarded as extremely important in the Ark, only guards were required to maintain an above-average level of physical strength and dexterity, living on earth was a completely different challenge. In the short time, they had arrived most Arkers had realized that no matter how smart you were if your physical condition was lacking you wouldn't survive for long.

The prideful smiles in Octavia's, Murphy's, and Wells's faces were unmistakable, being called an elite team more than made up for the suffering that Clarke inflicted upon them. They promised to talk to the blonde about including others in their daily training; they knew Clarke would be happy to add more recruits to her cause.

Clarke's idle daydreaming was cut short when she felt Finn seating beside her. His scrutiny made her feel uncomfortable; his eyes linger on her as a starving animal would look at its first meal in ages. The blonde hands twitched at her sides and she had to make a conscious effort to not reach for one of her weapons.

Knowing that Lexa would have already punched him for his blatant staring and persistence brought a smile to her face, it was not the action itself that brought her happiness but the fact that even when she was exhausted and dealing with unwanted suitors her first thought was always about Heda. No matter what she was dealing with Lexa always was at the forefront of her mind and, even if it sounded stupid, that realization made her feel even closer to the Commander.

"Did you need something Finn?" The blonde cleared her throat and shook her head to get rid of her fantasies. She would reunite with Lexa soon enough, there was no point in wasting time with idle dreams.

"Oh no, I just wanted to… talk. How is my warrior princess today?" Finn playfully bowed to her and gave her a flower.

His words echoed in her mind, my warrior princess. It was not the first time she had been called that but it sounded so wrong coming from his lips that Clarke was frozen for a second.

"Does my warrior princess like it when I kiss her like this?" Lexa's sensual voice filtered through her mind, a wave of unbridled lust sweeping through her. She could feel the commander's lips leaving a trail of wet kisses in her neck, rapidly descending to the valley of her breasts. Long and elegant fingers traced her ribcage, dangerously close to where she needed them the most.

Clarke was so lost in her fantasy that she didn't realize she had been staring at Finn for quite some time.

"See something you like?"

His voice quickly brought her back to the present, harshly reminding her when and where she was.

"Send this fool on his merry way so we may keep dreaming"

"Since when do you support my fantasies?"

"We have been working really hard, I think we earned it"

"Don't flatter yourself, Finn, I'm just tired" If she had been in a better frame of mind she wouldn't have been so harsh but she was still reeling from her lust-induced memory and thus had no real filter.

"Can I ask you a question?" Finn said, completely ignoring her not-so-subtle hint of wanting to be alone.

Despite her anger at being interrupted Clarke found herself looking attentively at Finn, his persistence in pursuing her had stirred some complicated feelings in her heart. She didn't love him, nor lusted after him, but he made her… confused.

Whenever she looked at Wells, Octavia, Murphy, Charlotte, and even Bellamy to some degree, it made her happy, having a second chance with them filled her with hope and warmth but Finn, on the other hand, awoke a crashing wave of emotions that constantly quarrel in her. He brought joy, guilt, and sadness into her life and she still hadn't found a way for those clashing feelings to peacefully co-exist.

Looking at Finn made her feel guilty for having killed him before, joy for being the one who gave him his life back, somewhat lessening the burden of his previous death, and sadness, so much sadness.

Her sorrow steamed not only from knowing they could never have a second chance, she had moved on from him but a piece of her heart would always belong to her first lover, but also from how much she had hurt Raven in the past. It had not been until Lexa betrayed her in the mountain that she finally understood the magnitude of Raven's feelings and she would never forgive herself for putting someone else through such misery.

Having experienced true love Clarke finally understood the real root of her infatuation. Being isolated for so long in the Ark and sent to an unfamiliar place made her leach to the first person to show her kindness and affection, she poured all she had into her relationship with Finn to avoid dealing with the trauma of her mother signing her and her father's death sentence, she seeks solace in his arms to gloss over the hurt of not having her best friend by her side but most of all she let him consume her to escape the grim reality of death and sickness that surrounded them since they arrived on earth.

She had focused on all his good qualities; handsome face, effortless charm, and unwavering loyalty and never allowed his mistakes to taint the idealized version of him she had built on her mind. As long as she believed in him, in the love he promised, she could keep herself from spiraling down.

The first time around his death had only cemented how perfect he had been, her grief hadn't allowed her to truly understand the real nature of her feelings. When he had murdered innocent people in her name she had tried to justify him, he had been simply misguided, she told herself. Finn, her handsome and sweet Finn, wasn't a cold-hearted killer; he had simply been a grief-stricken lover. Not even the guilt of feeling responsible for those deaths had been enough to shatter the larger-than-life figure she had made him out to be and the additional remorse of his death had compounded that.

Now her good memories of Finn were distant and blurred, whatever lust and infatuation she had felt for him were long gone and forgotten. When she looks at him all she sees is a good-looking but immature boy who would never be able to challenge her nor help her became the leader she needs to be for her people.

"Is Murphy your boyfriend?" Finn asked with poorly concealed jealousy.

"No, he is one of my best friends… like a brother I would say. Why?" Clarke tried to keep her annoyance at bay, why was she wasting her time with him?. If he was this jealous of Murphy she didn't want to imagine how he would react once Lexa was back in her life, as the blonde was sure she would not be able to hide how she felt for the commander.

"I saw you two hugging often and Murphy doesn't strike me as the hugging type," He said, the accusation was clear in his voice.

The blonde wanted to hold his arms and shook him until he understood that she was not interested in pursuing a relationship with him. She wanted to shout that his cheeky grin and boyish charms were completely wasted on her.

In the end, she managed to keep her temper in check and answered him honestly "I'm a hugger, and John, God bless him, tolerates my quirks"

Clarke was aware that she had not been like this before but in this timeline she found herself seeking out a hug or a hand to hold quite frequently, as some kind of physical anchor that prevented her from spiraling into madness. To prevent any misunderstanding she limited herself to her closest friends and thankfully they had simply accepted it as part of her personality and made no further comments about it.

"Ohh well, that's ok… it's good, really good"

"What do you mean by…?" but Clarke never finished her sentence because Finn had rapidly put his hands on her arms, holding her closer, and kissed her on the lips.

At first, Clarke was in shock but as soon as she regained her bearings she pushed him off and put some distance between them.

"What the fuck Finn?!"

"I… I'm sorry, I think… no, I know that I love you Clarke and I, I had to be honest about my feelings, I had to tell you"

"Even if you do love me, which I doubt, you had no right to do what you did"

"I do love you, Clarke!"

"Lust or infatuation, sure, but not love. You don't know me, Finn, you can't love someone you know nothing about"

"Let me get to know you then" He offered with an impish smile, completely misreading her negative reaction as another step of the seduction game they seemed to be playing since they had boarded the dropship.

"Finn, I'm not interested in you. I thought I had made myself clear before"

He hung his head low in confusion but soon his once hopeful demeanor turned to anger "You saved me in the dropship"

"I was being a decent person; I would have done the same for anyone in that position"

"No, it's not just that… you stare at me all the time, you laugh at my jokes, you…"

"I was being friendly; I wasn't flirting with you and for the staring… I space out sometimes, it has nothing to do with you" Well, at least not in the way you want, the blonde amended in her head.

"Please, give me a chance… I know I can be a good boyfriend"

"Finn nothing you say or do will ever change my mind, I'm sorry"

"One date, that's all I ask for"

"I think it would be better if we stay away from each other until your feelings go away"

"I can't just forget and move on Clarke, I already tried," He said pleadingly.

"Try harder then" The blonde turned around and left before she said something she would regret.

"Ohh Clarke, I'm sorry" Octavia whispered to her when she approached their group.

"I take you all heard what happened"

Murphy snickered and Wells elbowed him in the ribs, Clarke was already feeling down, there was no need to make her angry too.

"Clarke, falling in love is not something you can control," Wells said, trying to get her to see Finn's side. He didn't like the dude but he understood how painful it was to love someone who didn't love you back, especially someone as unique as Clarke Griffin.

"I know that Wells but I said no multiple times, he should have respected that. He had no right to kiss me"

"I'm not saying you are in the wrong Clarke, I just…"

"You what?!" The blonde understood Wells was just trying to keep peace among them but she was simply too fed up with Finn's bullshit to even try and be civil.

"Nothing… I will shut up now"

"Good call junior" Murphy said loudly laughing at Well's mildly panicked face.

Octavia was aware that Wells didn't mean to sound patronizing but he would never truly understand what it felt like to be a woman dealing with unwanted advances. Since landing on earth she has had quite many suitors vying for her attention and she was already exhausted from dealing with them, she could not even imagine what it felt like for Clarke who probably has had to fend them off since she was a lot younger.

The brunette affectionately rolled her eyes at the boys and took it upon herself to distract Clarke. She began to tell her all about the delinquents that wanted to join her fitness crash course, making the blonde laugh when she remarked how insane they all must be to even consider it in the first place.

Clarke checked her father's watch for what it felt like the hundred times in the last hour. She willed time to go faster but the more desperate she sounded the more the hands of the clock seemed to taunt her, moving at a glacial pace.

Today was the day Raven was set to arrive and the blonde knew she needed to get to her as fast as possible; the brunette was the Arker's best, if not only, chance to survive. Clarke was aware that it was too much pressure to put in one person but she also knew that Raven would step up to the challenge, her competitive, and slightly arrogant, nature wouldn't allow her to stay on the sidelines.

The mechanic's expertise had been invaluable the first time around but the love triangle she had been embroiled in had taken a toll on the talented woman, Clarke hoped that by removing that stressful factor Raven's brilliancy would shine even brighter now.

Clarke forcefully threw the rocks on her hands, sighing in frustration. Since she had seen the pod descending she had been trying to light up her crudely made torch but she couldn't get the rocks to ignite. If the circumstances had been different it wouldn't have bothered her too much but time was working against her, every minute that went by reminded her that she needed to leave their camp as soon as possible but doing so without a torch was simply out of the question.

Clarke heard someone approaching; the footsteps were loud in the otherwise dead-silent camp. A shiver of fear run through her spine and she instinctively reached for her knife. The blonde was about to launch herself towards her opponent when her mind caught up with her instincts and she realized that whoever was coming was one of the delinquents, as no grounder would have made such a ruckus.

"Who is there?" She forced her voice to remain calm but she didn't put away her knife, not all Arkers were friendly towards her.

"Clarke? It's me, Charlotte"

The tension finally left Clarke, her shoulders sagged and she allowed herself a small smile, seeing Charlotte always made her happy.

"Why are you up Char?, Did you have another nightmare?"

"Oh no, I'm fine. I just… Octavia snores, you know? and she woke me up and I realized you weren't in the tent and I got worried so…"

"It's ok, Char. I'm glad it was not a nightmare" Clarke smiled at the little girl, cutting her rambling short.

"So… Octavia snores?" Charlotte laughed at Clarke's humorous tone.

"Oh yeah and she is… loud… unbelievably so"

Clarke chuckled again, simple moments like this made her forget how bleak their current reality was.

"So… where are you going?"

Clarke thought about lying and sending Charlotte to bed but she had painfully learned that secrets always came back to bite you in the ass and it was best to just be honest, or as honest as one could be at least. "I saw a light; I think it's a pod from the Ark so I'm going to investigate"

"Can I come?"

"Well…"

"I can ignite the torches for you" The little blonde bargained.

"Ok, fine. If you promise to be careful you can come. I will just let Octavia know so she doesn't worry"

While walking towards the communal tent she thought about the conversation she had with Wanheda just a few minutes ago, before Charlotte's presence put an abrupt end to it.

In her previous life she had survived alone in the woods for months and while Clarke wouldn't call herself an expert she had certainly been proficient enough, but now, for some reason, some of her most basic skills, like making fire, had completely deserted her. She knew the theory and even tried to mimic the movements she recalls using before but it simply didn't work.

When presented with the conundrum Wanheda was as confused as Clarke but after giving it a bit of thought she concluded that limiting the access to previous knowledge could be the Universe way to protect Clarke's brain, as too much information from different timelines could drive a human insane.

Wanheda theorized that as the blonde had been chosen as the embodiment of Death, the most important warrior spirit to had ever roamed the earth if she said so herself, any skill not directly related to combat, like strategic thinking and physical strength, would be considered if not irrelevant, at the very least secondary, and therefore not important enough for her to be blessed with them.

The Spirit suggested they tested her theory by trying different combat-related arts like archery, knife throwing, or wrestling and while Clarke agree that they needed to know if she could master those skills easily - or faster than what would be considered normal-, thus proving or rejecting Wanheda's claims, now was not the time to dwell on what type of abilities she may or may not have.

"Octavia"

"Oh Lincoln just kiss me"

Octavia's lovesick sigh brought a smile to Clarke's face; she was happy for her friend and hoped that the day when they could show their love in the open came soon enough.

"Hey O wake up"

"Linc… Clarke"

"Yeah, it's me" The blonde completely ignored her friend's slip of the tongue. If Octavia hadn't told her about Lincoln yet it meant she was not ready for anyone to know.

"I think I saw a pod landing, Charlotte and I are going to investigate"

"Oh, ok. Have fun" Octavia's sleep-addled voice suddenly turned a few octaves higher "wait, a pod and Charlotte… you are taking Charlotte to check out a Pod that just landed?!"

"Well, I had planned to go alone but she insisted and…"

"It's ok, I get it. At least this way you can keep an eye on her, if you tell her no she will just follow you"

"Yeah, that's what I thought"

"Good luck and wake me up whenever you two get back"

"See you later O"

When Clarke went back Charlotte was holding two, already lit, torches. A huge smile painted on her face at the prospect of going on some sort of secret mission with Clarke.

"Ready?"

"To follow you? Always" the little blonde said while holding Clarke's free hand, giving it an affectionate squeeze before they started walking.

Charlotte would never be able to truly grasp the powerful effect that her words had on Clarke. Always, a simple careless word that many threw out there without understanding its meaning but Clarke knew the little blonde had been honest and for someone who had been alone most of her life, always relying on herself, such an unwavering and unconditional loyalty was the most precious gift than anyone could have ever given her.

The universe, or whatever it was out there, may have taken something from her but they had also blessed her in so many ways that Clarke couldn't find it in herself to complain.