Elizabeth stared at the town as Portsmouth came into view. The six days at sea had been interminable, with the sailors treating her with quiet deference, scarcely a word was spoken to her. While Miss Bennet might have had company, the widowed Mrs. Darcy was beyond approach. She had even found herself missing Mr. Darcy's dry wit. As near as she could come to laughter in these grim days, she nearly laughed at herself for missing him. She who had been so eager to be out of his company. It was clear that sea-faring did not agree with her, however she failed to be seasick.
Captain Newbury gave her grave farewells and saw her safely onto a carriage. She could not bring herself to post any of Darcy's letters, and contented herself with writing a few lines to Longbourn, telling them of her imminent arrival. In fact the journey was more than 100 miles, two day's hard travel if she did not stop in London. The idea of calling on Mr. Bingley, his sisters or Miss Darcy chilled her to the bone, but she thought of calling on her aunt and uncle Gardiner, before thinking that they were most likely in Hertfordshire with the Bennets and she would serve them all best by arriving as quickly as possible.
It was a lonely journey, nearly unbearably so after her long solitude aboard the Spaniel. She had more time than she could possibly want to reflect on her own behavior and her feelings.
She contented herself with writing a long letter to Mrs. Romney, to whom she could relate her surprising discovery of Darcy's intentions toward her family with some abandon. Of her own guilt in his death she said nothing, for she could not come to terms with it. Only Jane could absolve her, if absolution were possible.
The carriage door opened to display the anxious but happy faces of her father, mother, all her sisters, the Gardiners and Mrs. Phillips. She was swept into so many embraces and heard so many clamoring requests for information that she could scarce take it in.
Mrs. Gardiner, happily, saw her distress and whispered to her father, who took her firmly by the hand and led her inside.
"Now, everyone, Lizzie has had a tiring journey. I'm sure explanations can wait until after she has recovered from the road."
Elizabeth looked up at her father in gratitude. He put an arm about her shoulders and looked at her fondly. "I cannot say how much you have been missed, Lizzie. We are all eager to hear your strange tales, but do not lest they wrest them from you until you can do them justice."
The familiar sights of her home filled her with comfort, and with great relief she entered her own room. Here she could put all into place. Here she could make sense of all that had occurred and decide what was to be done.
Elizabeth looked longingly at her bed, but it could be put off no longer. She soothed the black muslin over herself — looking in the mirror she thought it suited her not at all. It had been so long since the family had been in mourning that it was rather too small for her. She had a year of black clothes ahead of her, so she must put some thought to having black gowns made up.
With that thought in mind, she exited her room and descended the stairs to her waiting family.
On entering the dining room, she noted with comfort that the Phillips had departed. Facing the Bennets combined with the Gardiners was difficult enough. Gasps and whispers sounded as she entered the room. Mary started to speak, but Jane silenced her. Elizabeth took her place, gathered her courage and spoke.
"I do not know how much rumor has reached you, but I must tell you that Mr. Darcy and I were married and while we were traveling back from Guernsey, he was swept off the ship and was killed."
Mrs. Bennet cried out, Lydia and Kitty gasped and started in with questions. Mary seemed at a loss for an appropriate proverb. Mrs. Gardiner grew pale and had to be supported by her husband. Jane was instantly at Elizabeth's side, comforting her. Mr. Bennet was absolutely silent, his eyes wide in wonder.
When Mr. Gardiner had helped his wife from the room to lie down and the mother and sisters' hubbub had died down, Jane remained at Lizzie's side, soothing and murmuring to her.
Elizabeth tearfully explained that Mr. Darcy had prevailed upon her to elope, had engineered the Gretna Green misdirection and instead brought them to St. Peter Port, where they had been married by the Town Church's vicar.
"I have all the documents, the marriage certificate," she said. "Father I also have — I have some other papers that I must beg you to confer with me about. I know not what to do with such business."
A look of concern lit on Mr. Bennet's face. "Of course, Lizzie. I will attend to anything that requires it. Do not worry yourself about any such things."
Lydia was looking at her with wonder.
"Lizzie, you're a widow! Now you can chaperone us to the balls and parties and Mama need not be bothered!"
This unbefitting exultation seemed to mark an end to the orderly family gathering, and the party broke up, their dinner untasted, to confer over these tidings in private.
Leaning heavily on Jane's arm, Elizabeth retired back to her room.
"Poor Lizzie," Jane said, seating her sister comfortably on her bed and drawing blankets about her.
"Oh Jane, how I wanted you, needed your comfort and counsel. It seems ages since you left for London. How you must have suffered when Mr. Darcy's letter was made known to you."
"We were all shock," Jane admitted. "When we read that you and he were headed to Scotland, we did not know what to think. Papa made such a point that you dislike him. Mary pointed out that perhaps your dislike might have been hiding a deeper regard, but I did not think it could be so."
"I admit that upon our acquaintance in Kent, I did grow to like him a bit better, Until the colonel — oh Jane, how can I tell you — Mr. Bingley —"
Jane's gaze widened at this. "I had not thought to tell you, since your affairs were so much greater."
"Oh, please, Jane, tell me. Any good news is vastly needed."
"Mr. Bingley wrote to father asking his permission to pay his addresses to me. The letter came just yesterday. I don't know if he has yet written back, in the excitement of your return, but I feel sure that he will give his consent. Mr. Bingley said he would return to Netherfield within the month. We've said nothing to mother as yet."
Jane's cheeks were glowing as she gave her sister this news. Elizabeth eagerly congratulated and embraced her.
"I knew all along that Mr. Bingley loved you. It was in Kent that I discovered, Mr. Darcy's cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, told me that Darcy had separated him from you, had used his influence over his friend to force him to stop his attentions to you. He had told me that morning, and I was so outraged at his officious behavior that when he arrived that same day to propose, I could not hear him without anger. I told him that my disgust at his conduct in your and Mr. Bingley's attachment and his infamous behavior toward Mr. Wickham made it evident to me that I could never marry him."
"Then how could he have prevailed upon you to accept and to elope with him? How did he overcome your anger, Lizzie?"
Elizabeth turned away and hid her face.
"Lizzie?"
Only the soft sound of her sister's sobbing answered her. Bewildered, Jane put her arms around Elizabeth and waited. Harsh gasps sounded from her throat as she poured out her suffering. After some little time had passed in this manner, Elizabeth regained herself.
"Jane, I do not know if I could ever have forgiven him. He would not accept my refusal of him. He all but forced me into the carriage to Portsmouth and did not let me go until we were safely on board and off to sea. All of my denials and protestations were for naught."
"Infamous behavior! Oh my poor Lizzie, to be treated so. How could even a man so proud as Mr. Darcy behave in such a fashion? It is unpardonable!"
Elizabeth poured out the rest of the story: her resignation to the union as they entered St. Peter Port, her conversation with Captain Newbury, her escape from the church, her meeting with Mrs. Romney.
"I do not know how I would have gone through with the ceremony without her," she confessed. "I knew that I must, for the sake of my family and my own reputation, but facing Mr. Darcy at the altar after what he had done, it was too much to be borne alone. How I missed you!" She fell again into her sister's arms.
After renewed freshets of tears, Elizabeth finished the tale of the ceremony and Mr. Darcy's tragic end in the Channel.
"Jane, I was so angry with him, and he was gone so quickly. Do you think I might have saved him?"
"Oh no, Lizzie. Against the storm and the waves, how could you have kept him from going overboard? Likely if you had tried, you would have been lost as well."
Elizabeth reflected upon this. Perhaps it was true. Musing, she opened a chest and rifled though papers until she found one letter in particular.
"There is something else I must share with you, Jane. In Mr. Darcy's papers I found this letter to me in which he describes the truth of Mr. Wickham's dealings with his family." She gave it to her sister to read. When Jane had finished, she looked at Elizabeth with staring eyes.
Elizabeth took back the letter, staring at the writing with a nagging fondness.
"Can you believe how terribly wicked Mr. Wickham was to Miss Darcy, and she only 15 years old?" Elizabeth asked.
"It is too dreadful," Jane replied. But she could not believe her sister's dead husband a liar in this.
"Mr. Wickham's attachment to Mary King came to naught, but the regiment will be gone from Meryton in less than a month," Jane reported.
"Good," Elizabeth replied. "He can be gone none too soon for my taste. Dreadful man, to abuse a young girl's trust so. She was lucky to have a brother to protect her." She looked at her sister with tear-filled eyes.
"Oh Jane, what am I to do? It is too much."
"Calm yourself. Go to sleep, and in the morning you can talk to Papa. He will know what is best."
Elizabeth felt her heavy lids dragging and admitted the wisdom of Jane's plan. With Jane's help she was comfortably into bed in a few minutes, and asleep before her sister slipped out the door.