Edited: 3/5/16

Author's Note: Warning – Fluff, humor, and some silliness. I'm not so great at it, so that's why this chapter took so long.

Chapter 28 – What's in a name?

"He who overcomes his anger conquers his greatest enemy." – Latin Proverb

Logan perched on top of a large boulder, savoring the wind in his hair and the burn of alcohol down his throat as he took another long swig of Jack. He knew it was a pointless gesture, with his metabolism, drinking booze was about as intoxicating as water. Still, the burn on the way down felt good, and maybe if he drank enough he'd get a pleasant buzz. Then maybe he would stop thinking.

Thinking was becoming the bane of his existence. Damn it all, why was this happening to him? Psycho monster in his head, sure he could deal with it. Trapped in a school with a bunch of snobbish mutants who thought their shit didn't stink? Fine. No problem. Being told that he wasn't the dominant personality in his fucked up little relationship with the monster in his head? All right, not happy about it, but he could deal. But waking up naked with said monster's boy toy?

Not just waking up with the naked assassin. If it was that alone, Logan could have coped. No, that wasn't what made him want to drink himself into oblivion. For a guy with so few memories, you'd think he'd want to hold on to any scrap he could get, but he wished he could use alcohol to rub out that last memory.

The memory of IX's skin under his hand, and his body, his not X's reacting. How he wanted to finish it, to fill IX up and make him scream for more. A shudder twisted through him, and Logan tilted his head back for another long draw while he tried to ignore the raging hard on between his legs.

He still didn't know what X had done when he escaped. That was blank emptiness. Not a comforting feeling, but true. Logan knew he should go to Baldy and ask, and he should find out what the hell happened to IX to bleed him bad enough to set X off like that. What the fuck was going on while he'd been locked in his endless battle with X?

Instead, he was out here trying the impossible and failing. This was his third bottle, and if the other two were anything to go by, he wasn't going to manage to get drunk. Damn.

Again his mind circled back to the main problem. IX. He wanted the little male, not just X like he'd tried to convince himself. How stupid to believe differently, X is me, a twisted broken version of me, but still me.

That was the crux of the matter right there. X and Logan shared the same body, the same attractions, and as much as he hated to admit it, both wanted to sink into IX's tight heat and dominate him completely. The thought flat out did it for him, and it took every strap of humanity he had left not to hunt IX down and finish what they'd begun that morning. It's wrong, he's just a kid.

But was he? Was he really? That plagued him the most. IX was young, 11 or 12 at the most, but that didn't match what his senses told him. He didn't smell like a child moving into adolescence. Instead, he smelled like a grown adult. Xavier told him IX was fully developed, explaining about what the scientists did. Could he overlook IX's real age in favor of the truth of his existence?

Thinking about it made his head pound. How could one short man be such a conundrum? It didn't help that the bastards also made him look small, delicate, childlike. That threw his human mind even more. Whenever he was away from the youth, he was swamped by feelings of guilt and disgust. But when IX got too close, all thoughts of civilized behavior went out the window.

Now he knew what he was missing, and already his mouth ached to taste IX again. Was this how X felt all the time? How in the world had the feral slept in the same place with IX for years and not taken advantage of the tiny male? He shook his head and took another long drink. A soft growl slipped from his lips when the last drop of alcohol slid down his throat. Double damn. That was the only booze he'd been able to find, and he'd snatched it from the blue furred mutant's domain. He had a feeling he would have to answer for that later.

X stirred in the back of his mind. Another soft growl curled his lips, but to his surprise, the caged feral didn't attack the bars of his kennel. Whatever happened before he woke up naked with IX left a mark on the animalistic personality, and he seemed to be continent licking his metaphorical wounds. Logan could handle that. He felt better, but he didn't want to begin the fight for dominance again. No, having his mind torn apart over and over was the last thing he wanted. Maybe IX or the Professor managed to cow the alternate? He could only hope.

Leaves drifted to the ground in a gentle shower of yellow, red, orange, and brown. The scent of fall hung in the air, dancing between the falling leaves like tiny fairies, and Kitty took a deep breath, savoring the day. She'd always loved fall. Pumpkin Pie, Halloween, and giant piles of leaves to play in. The heat of summer mellowed down to a cool comfort that didn't hold the bitter edge of winter yet. Doing homework outside was a must this time of year.

Later, she'd make IX go on a walk through the woods with her, and maybe she'd tease him into a game of tag. She glanced up and smiled as he moved with liquid grace between the falling leaves. The bo staff hissed as it cut the air, beautiful in its deadly intensity. If she tilted her head a little, and let her eyes un-focus, she could almost picture IX fighting against invisible opponents.

After the Professor apologized, IX asked for the weapon back. Though he had no one to practice against, he seemed to enjoy going through the motions alone. Kitty's smile wilted a little when she remembered his response to her begging for training. The bo was such an awesome weapon, and she wanted to master it, but he refused to teach her.

"The only way I know how to teach is through pain, and I won't harm you."

Kitty wasn't sure what he meant by that, and wasn't willing to demand an answer. Whatever it was, she knew it would be bloody and horrifying. Nope, she could do without knowing why he used pain as a teacher. Because he was taught with pain, Kitty bit her lip at the thought, not wanting it to be true. Had they beaten him if he made a mistake? Why would he do the same to her? Couldn't he teach her without hurting her? Maybe, maybe not.

Instead she set her book aside and watched poetry in motion. She knew it would be amazing to see him fight against someone as skilled as himself, and she hoped to see it someday.

IX.

The name always stuck in her throat. It wasn't a name, it was a label. More importantly, it was the designation he'd been given by the bad guys and it still tied him to them. Maybe it was time for IX to get a real name.

"IX?"

Kitty sighed with appreciation as he came to a twirling, perfect stop. He'd be amazing at ballet.

"Yes?" The cool word coupled with his penetrating green gaze made her blush and banish the thought of him prancing across a stage in tights.

"Um, well I was thinking about your name. I mean, I think maybe it's time for you to have a real name, and not just a number? What do you think?" Her voice squeaked a little, and the blush refused to fade as he stared at her.

Tilting his head, IX gave an indifferent shrug she recognized as one of Pietro's mannerisms. It creeped her out when he used other peoples' gestures but she knew that he thought it was his mission to learn to be more human, so she didn't scold him about it. Personally, she thought he was perfect the way he was. Well, maybe he could be a little more expressive, and he could smile more, but she wanted real smiles, real emotion. Not him aping others in an effort to play human.

"My name doesn't matter. Call me what you wish." With that, he went back to his practice, once again ignoring her.

Kitty blinked, unable to decide if she should be pissed or pleased by his response. It was so IX. Of course he didn't care. She could call him Rock, and he'd be happy. He had the emotional range of one after all.

Scowling, she stared at him, no longer thinking about how graceful he was, instead annoyed by his own lack of concern over his name. What if he didn't like it? Would he tell her, or go along with it to make her happy and have to live with a name he hated for the rest of his life? Then she had to chuckle at herself. IX didn't know how to hate, and he was perhaps the bluntest person she'd ever met. She didn't think there was any way he'd accept a name he didn't like.

A red leaf fell on her head, bringing a smile to her lips. At least this one was safe from IX. His bo sliced the air, shredding another unlucky leaf while she pondered what sort of name to give him. The task settled on her shoulders, and Kitty realized how important it was. She was giving IX a real name. Like he's a real boy, again she giggled.

This time, IX's movements slowed as he glanced over at her. Probably wonders why I'm over here laughing like a loon, she made a shooing motion with her hand, and he started the dance again.

Names, names, what would be the perfect name? What did she think about when she thought about IX? Scary, but not so much anymore. Sure, she knew he was dangerous, but he was also kind of cute and harmless too. It was a weird mix. His eyes. They were the most amazing shade of green. Maybe she could craft a name around them? Jade? No, that was too girlie, and he already looked girlie enough. He didn't need a girl name to make things worse. Hmm, how about Sage? No, that wouldn't work either. Maybe she should go with something normal like Michael or Dave? She grinned and stifled another chuckle. IX was many things but Normal wasn't even close to one of them. He needed a name that reflected who he was, and wasn't another mask he could slide into place. It had to reflect him, the true him, somehow.

IX leaned the bo against the tree and sat next to her. His back was stiff, but his breath smoothed out into deep tranquility, letting her know he was meditating. That had been a shock to the small girl. She never thought he'd be the meditative type. Closing her eyes, Kitty let her breath match his, and let her thoughts drift away.

In the theater of her mind, IX appeared, once more wielding his bo. He moved like the wind, dancing water, or fire's gentle sway. Even though he was in constant motion, there was a strong sense of peace about him too, as if nothing could ever touch him. Then she pictured him bald with one of those red robes.

He would have made an awesome monk.

"That's it," Kitty shouted. Instead of jumping, IX cracked a single eye to look at her. She pouted before her lips curled into a delighted smile. "I know your name."

"Oh?" Not a hint of curiously showed in his face, but Kitty didn't let that bother her.

"Zen."

"Zen?" He echoed back, tasting the name.

Her grin brightened, it wasn't a no. "Yes. Because you remind me of a Zen Buddhist. You're always so calm and collected. It's perfect."

IX's eye slid shut again, and Kitty drooped. "Zen. It is acceptable." A squeal of delight cut the air as Kitty threw herself at him and hugged the life out of him.

In the weeks that followed Xavier's announcement, thing settled and a new relationship with Zen began though it wasn't the acceptance Xavier wished, it was better than what had gone before.

Pyro glared at the back of IX's - no Zen now, how lame, as if changing his name will change who he was - head. He knew the assassin knew he was staring, but it didn't matter. The bastard wouldn't do anything about it. Even though he was no longer bound by Xavier's rules, he never retaliated against their past deeds. Pathetic really, he expected more out of the killer robot.

Instead, Zen was...well a lot like that stupid name Kitty gave him. He was nonreactive. To top it off, the brat was also brilliant. Now that they weren't destroying most of his homework, Zen was at the top of most of their classes. He'd always aced the tests, but with his abysmal homework scores, he'd been a C student. Not that it mattered to Pyro, but Bobby was totally miffed at being lower than Zen. Which, of course, made sharing a room with him a pain in the ass. Now it was all about studying, and not having any fun. Without IX to pick on, he was bored. Things in the world were heating up, and they were here learning about peace and harmony.

So fucking lame.

Flicking her black hair out of her eyes, Jubilee studied Zen and Kitty. She hated how much time her once friend spent with the little killer. Hated how...left out she felt. Maybe she could go over and sit with them?

Instead she turned her troubled eyes back to her meal. No, if Kitty wanted to be his friend that was fine, not like she needed to be friends with the obnoxious girl anyway. Again her eyes strayed back to the two, and she had to squash the urge to get up and join them. Kitty made her choice, and so had Jubilee.

A delighted smile graced Rogue's lips. Fall had finally arrived, and soon it would bring the comforting and cold embrace of winter. In her heart she gave a tiny cheer for the death of summer. No more being too hot. No more being ignored by her friends while they went outside to play, and no more being locked away inside.

Soon, she'd have the freedom of winter and wouldn't have to worry about accidentally draining her friends. They'd all be wearing extra layers, and having fun together. Perfect. Winter wasn't here yet, so she still had a while longer to wait.

IX, Zen, his name is Zen now, walked past her, down the trial towards the woods. Her fingers twitched, longing to reach out and grab his hand. Not out of malice, but simply to feel someone's hand in hers. The smile died on her face, and she fought the urge to cry. If she hadn't been so stupid, maybe he would be her friend now. Maybe he'd let her touch him. Maybe...

Maybe.

Baleful anger tore at Peter's gut every time he spotted IX. IX He would always be IX. Zen didn't fit him at all. He wasn't worthy of a name, even one as ridiculous at that. No, he was just a number, and should have always stayed that way. He was a monster.

He saved me.

No. It was his fault Logan was here in the first place. Both of them were monsters, beasts that belonged to the government and had been sent to destroy them. One didn't befriend monsters. You didn't name them, or care for them.

They didn't save you.

He closed his fist and wished the conflicting emotions would end. Things were easier before. Before the little monster took a killing blow meant for him. Why? Why did he put himself between Peter and X? It was beyond illogical. Yes, he couldn't kill them himself, but why allow himself to be harmed in Peter's stead when he could have let X kill him?

Do not force me to destroy you.

Peter's teeth ground together. How many times had he tried to erase that from his mind? Not the words. No, the tone. IX didn't want to hurt X, it hurt him to think of doing so. NO. IX couldn't feel, was incapable of feeling.

Wasn't he?

Bobby's pen tapped against his page of homework. Things hadn't gotten back to normal. Hell, he was beginning to think that there was no such thing as normal. He could barely remember life before IX, and now Zen wasn't much better. They no longer attacked the kid, but he was still alien. Zen was like a fox in a pack of hounds.

He didn't belong, and his continued presence put a strain on everyone. They did their best to ignore him, but even though he wasn't interacting with them, his mere existence was wrong. Everything about him grated against his nerves and made him want to lash out.

But, maybe Kitty was right.

Maybe. He snorted. Maybe tomorrow the sun would turn into a golden coin and fall from the sky too.

Anything could happen. Anything at all.

At first, the ignoring was hostile, a deliberate snub against the stranger in their midst who could no longer be their punching bag. But then, it became habit as time passed and their minds were once again taken up by grades, dating, powers, and the world outside the comfort of the Institute.

Most of the students chose to forget about Zen, though there were a few who could never forget. They still watched, and still harbored hatred, savoring it. The words of one old man weren't enough to turn all from their destructive mindset, and there were a few who were willing to risk punishment in order to punish.

After endless months of torment, Zen's instincts to lash out against any perceived attack were blunted. For Pietro, that was a good thing. The only way the small assassin could stop the speed demon would be through deadly force, so he had to hold back his reaction whenever the idiotic male's self-control broke and he attacked.

Even his shields were useless against Pietro. Now that his powers were free, Zen always sensed his approach, but the speed was too great for him to do anything to stop it. If he could have killed the boy, then he would have, but anything short of that? Undoable. A shield would have worked, if he'd been able to get it up before Pietro got into his personal space. But he was too fast.

That's how Zen ended up duct taped to the ceiling of the great room. As if that wasn't bad enough, the mutant knew about his need for shadows to teleport and had left a flashlight on the ground beneath him, keeping Zen in a perfect circle of light.

Zen's fingers twitched, but no amount of wiggling would free him from the sticky substance. Tape covered his lips, so he couldn't ask for help from the few students who passed, and like all humans, the foolish children never looked up. He could have reached out to Xavier to free him, but something stopped him. Some uncomfortable sensation in his gut made him reluctant to admit his predicament. Now that his power was free, he shouldn't end up in situations like this. It was unprofessional.

Jean entered the room, and Zen held his breath. Of all the people he'd want to see him like this, she was near the bottom of the list. There was something about the woman that set him on edge, a look in her eye that promised pain held back by the slimmest thread. Unlike the other adults, she gave him the sense of danger.

Then Logan appeared behind her. Interest sharpened his gaze as he watched the large feral. In the months since they'd woken up together, Logan made it a point to avoid him. Zen didn't fight him on it, not sure what to do with the duel personality ex-weapon. When they'd been partners, everything seemed so simple, now everything to do with Logan and X was complicated.

A spark of heat flashed in his chest when Logan's hand shot out and grabbed Jean, before he easily turned the woman to face him. That tiny spark grew, burning inside him as the feral's fingers stroked over her cheek, and he stared down into her face like she mattered to him. He couldn't hear the teasing words he whispered over the pounding of his heart, so much louder now than a second ago.

She made a halfhearted attempt to pull away, but Zen knew it was fake. Then Logan bent forward, his rough lips capturing hers while his arms pulled her into his larger frame.

Pain snapped in Zen's chest, fire seemed to burn him, mingled with things he couldn't begin to decipher. It tore through his body, boiling and his dark gaze locked on Jean. His thoughts amplified, narrowed, and were all about her. He imagined sliding a knife between her ribs, how it would feel to shred her heart, slash her throat, and dance in her blood.

Under that, another heat burned. For the first time in Zen's life, his body stirred as jealousy stroked his own desire to life.

This is stupid, stop, Scott...he's so hot, I want him, I want him to throw me down and ravish me like the beast he is...no, this isn't right. Jean's body throbbed with conflicting emotion. Every fiber of her wanted to melt into Logan, to take everything he offered until they both burned to ash. The sane part of her screamed that a student could walk by at any second. That Scott could walk by. That she was ruining her life.

Fear slammed into her as thoughts of sex were ripped away, replaced by vivid images of death. Fighting back a scream, she jerked back. Wild green eyes darted around the room before finding IX. Those poisonous eyes locked on her, killing the mood like a bucket of ice water. Or a bucket of gasoline that he'll light with that gaze. She hadn't forgotten the tiny burned up town, and how IX could do the same to her with a thought.

Terror won, and without looking back at Logan, or questioning how in the name of God he'd gotten duct taped to the ceiling in the first place, she fled. It was for the best. Logan was trouble, and IX would be the death of her if she didn't take care.

Logan almost sobbed when the beautiful woman pulled away from him. Since waking up with IX, he'd decided that he wasn't attracted to the tiny male. Not at all. Now that his mind wasn't destroying itself, he'd begun perusing Jean again in earnest. I almost had her that time.

Glaring up at the ceiling, and Zen, he sighed. Then a scent drifted down to him that stopped his heart. He closed his eyes, and took another long breath, the exhale coming out in a moan.

X chose that moment to stir. More than that, he lashed out at the cage with the same ferocity he'd shown when he'd caught the scent of IX's blood. "No," Logan growled, fighting to keep control.

Holding his breath, he ran the opposite direction Jean took. He had to get out of here. If X broke free now, hell he'd be fucking Zen right there in the living room for all the kiddies to see. No, no, no. He wouldn't do it.

Zen made a muffled sound that could have been a shout of frustration. The least they could have done was turned the flash light off so he could teleport. Every beat of his heart made his groin throb painfully against the tight binding of the tape, and he felt like his own power was burning him up from the inside out. What did I do wrong? He hadn't attacked Pietro. Maybe he was being punished for thinking ill thoughts of a teacher?

Closing his eyes, he took a slow breath, trying to steady his heartbeat. It was then he realized his power was calm in his mind, not burning him. What is wrong with me?

It took another two hours for someone else to come along, though Zen would have preferred Kitty or anyone else. The heat had died down during that time, and he'd convinced himself that nothing was wrong, it was just a strange reaction to the situation and could be safely forgotten.

Peter stopped in the doorway, looked at the flashlight, then up at Zen. His eyes darkened, and Zen knew he was thinking about leaving him there before an explosive sigh escaped the massive mutant.

"Well, I guess I owe you one," he grumbled under his breath before he shoved one of the couches under where Zen was pinned. He didn't move the flashlight however. Zen's eyes narrowed, but there wasn't much he could do.

A wolfish grin flashed on Peter's face as he reached up and worked one corner of the tape up off Zen's cheek before ripping it off his face in a single harsh jerk. Zen hissed. "You don't have to remove all the tape. Turn off the flashlight."

The cruel smile never left Peter's lips. "Where's the fun in that? Why does the flashlight matter anyway? Does the light really keep you from using your power?" Peter asked, curiosity adding a softer undertone to the gloating words.

"My form of teleportation requires shadows to function properly."

"Sure, like a demon or something, right?"

Zen blinked at him. "I do not know any demons or their powers, so I'm unable to compare them to myself."

Peter scowled at the bland reply. How could you insult someone like him? It was impossible. Grumbling under his breath about emotionless robots, he began the tedious task of ripping tap off the trapped assassin. Twenty minutes later, he'd gotten enough off that gravity won and Zen fell, bouncing off the side of the couch to land in a heap due to the numbness in his limbs.

Jumping down, Peter grabbed him and roughly pulled him to his feet. "This doesn't make us friends." he said, wanting to add a punch to make it stick even as he wanted to help the hapless kid sit down and ask if he was alright. He hated the opposing instincts.

"I understand," Zen replied. Not bothering to try and win him over. Instead, he flexed his arms and legs, getting the circulation back as quickly as possible so he could return to his room and have a little peace.

Peter shoved down all his thoughts about IX and let him go with a small shove. "Go on. Get the hell out of here."

Pain lanced through Zen's left shoulder as X's sharp teeth sank into his flesh. Instead of lying passive, like he always had, his hands reached up to tangle in the feral's hair. Every nerve felt alive, more than ever before. It felt like his skin was too sensitive. Heat burned in his veins, but it wasn't painful.

It was addictive. Again his cock stiffened, and he felt a jolt of unexpected fire when it rubbed along another stiff organ. X groaned into his neck, his tongue stroking Zen's flesh while his hips drove down to grind them together.

"X," Zen groaned, his eyes rolling back as a strange pressure began to build low in his gut. Everything was happening too fast, yet not fast enough. Want filled him up and drove him to jerk his hips up to match X's crushing weight. Panting, he rutted against X's stiff length, desperate for something he couldn't understand.

Then, lighting blazed through his nervous system. It almost felt like dying.

Zen's eyes snapped open. The room seemed to echo with the sound of his harsh breathing, and something damp dripped between his thighs. His hand shook as he reached down to touch the cooling mess. Bringing the soiled fingers up, he sniffed the strange liquid before his tongue darted out for a small taste.

It was the same as X. The same as Logan.

What was happening to him?

"I need to speak to you."

Kitty's eyes snapped open at the voice, and her vision was filled with Zen's face. With a squeak, she tried to sit up and almost banged her forehead into his, but he jerked back fast enough to avoid a mild concussion.

"Zen?" She rubbed her eyes. Sunlight filtered in through the window, but it was watery. Early morning sunlight. A soft snoring sound proved that her roomie slept on, oblivious to their visitor. "What are you doing in here?" she hissed, worried how Theresa would react if she woke to him in their room. Dear Goddess, she'd probably scream until his head popped off. Then again, maybe not. Even so long after the attack, she was reluctant to use her power. Guilt flared in her chest, like it did every time she thought of what happened, and of trying to befriend Theresa's attacker.

Shoving the unwanted thoughts away, Kitty sat up. "You can't be in here. Come on," getting up, she slid her feet into her Hello Kitty slippers before pushing him out the door. It was only then she realized he was wearing blue plaid pajamas that looked like something Bobby used to wear when he was shorter.

Then her befuddled mind caught up with the situation. Zen had broken into her room in the middle of the night...okay maybe not the middle of the night. Glancing at the clock she saw it was 7:12. Too damned early for a Sunday, that was for sure. She shook her head, trying to focus. Zen came into her room, something he'd never done before, woke her up, and wanted to talk.

He never wanted to talk. Heck, he'd never sought her out in all the time she'd forced her friendship on him. She was always the one who reached out to him, who tried to draw him out. And then there were the pajamas. Why was he wandering around in his night clothes? He'd never done that before.

Fear coiled in her gut. It all added up to a big problem. Whatever he wanted to talk about was going to be bad, she just knew it.

Resigning herself to the inevitable, Kitty brought him to one of the out of the way sitting rooms scattered around the mansion. "Okay, we can talk here. Is that all right? If not, we can get dressed and go talk outside, or maybe we can go to your room and talk if you want privacy. Do you want privacy?"

Zen blinked at her before his hand darted out and covered her lips to put a halt to the endless stream of questions. "Here is fine. Sit down."

Leading by example, he sat on the edge of one of the love seats. She'd spent enough time with him to notice the tautness of his muscles as a bad sign. Zen looked like he would spring back up any second if startled, like a cat tossed onto a go-cart race track.

"What's wrong?"

She watched him draw in a slow breath before he spoke. "There is something wrong with me."

Kitty's heart sank. "Wrong? What's wrong? Did someone hurt you? Was it Pietro? I told him to leave you alone!"

The rant stopped mid word when his lip twitched. "No, no one harmed me, but there's something wrong with my body."

"Is it...something the scientists did to you?" Her voice dropped low, terror almost choking the words. What if there were side effects to what had been done to him? Was he dying? Could Hank fix him?

Zen's eyes grew distant as he thought. "Perhaps. I do not know."

"What's happening?"

"For the past few days my penis has become ridged. I do-"

Kitty squawked, a sound akin to a duck being stepped on. In an instant she was on her feet. Her face was so red it looked like the skin might burst into flames. "Kitty?"

It took the small girl three strangled tries to get the words out. "Stay right here, IX, don't move okay? I'll...I'll get someone to help you okay? Don't move!" And then she was gone.

Zen stared at the door, unable to decipher what happened. I think there's something wrong with her too. But, he waited, hoping she would return and stop acting so strange.

BAM, BAM, BAM

"Ugn, go way," Pyro moaned, dragging a pillow over his head in a vain attempt to make the hideous noise stop.

It didn't.

"Bobby? Get your butt up, I need you!" Kitty's voice roared outside their door, and Pyro whimpered. All he wanted to do was sleep. Was that too much to ask?

Across the room, Bobby flailed up into wakefulness and fell off the bed in a heap of tangled blankets.

"Bobby!"

"Coming, I'm coming damn it. Stop trying to beat the door down." Bobby shouted back.

Lifting the edge of the pillow enough to peak out, Pyro stared at the fallen boy. "Jeeze dude, she isn't even your girlfriend and she has you whipped. Pathetic."

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up asshole, but you know if it was your name she was shrieking, you'd listen too."

Pyro sighed. "True, for such a little thing, Kitty's scary."

Bobby drug his fingers through his hair a couple of times, threw on yesterday's t-shirt and jerked open the door.

"What?" he snapped, ready to be angry before he saw how red Kitty's face was. "Kitty? Are you all right?"

Instead of bursting into tears or something equally girly and expected, she grabbed the front of his shirt and jerked him out into the hallway hard enough to almost make him fall over. "Come on, I need your help."

Five minutes later, they were holed up in another small enclave. "What's going on?" Bobby demanded. His arms were folded over his chest as he stared down at the small red faced girl.

"Look, I have a problem, and you're going to help me work it out Bobby Drake."

Uh oh, my first and last name, he shifted from foot to foot and fought not to break eye contact. "Fine, what do you need me to do?"

"Zen-"

"No way. I'm not helping you tame your pet psycho- Ouch, damn it Kitty, that hurt." He rubbed at his knee where she kicked him.

"Shut up and listen you big idiot. I'm still mad at you for how you treated Zen, and this is your big chance to prove to me and the Professor that you aren't a Neanderthal, that you actually have a brain in that frozen head of yours. So help me Goddess, if you don't do this I will make everything I did to IX look like a cake walk to what I do to you, do you understand Robert? Can you say Pretty in Pink?" Kitty hissed like her namesake, and dread froze Bobby's blood in his veins.

It was difficult to get on Kitty's bad side, but those who did suffered for it. He didn't even want to know what she'd do to him, and he knew the girl could hold a grudge for a long, long time. Bobby didn't want to spend the rest of his school years going from one prank to another. Huffing, he glared at Kitty. "Fine, whatever. What does he need? A body guard?"

"What? That's stupid, he could beat you half to death without breaking a sweat."

"Right."

"Yes right, the only reason he never taught you a real lesson was because Xavier wouldn't let him. If he ever wanted to, he could hurt you but enough of that. That's not the point." She swiped at her messy hair, and Bobby realized she looked as frazzled as he did. "I need you to talk to him. He's having...boy problems and I'm not equipped to handle it."

"Boy problems?" Bobby repeated.

"Bobby, please talk to him, and don't make it worse, okay? Be the guy I always thought you were, and not the jerk you turned into." She stared up at him with wide sapphire eyes, looking at him like he could cure all the world's ills. It was a damned good look.

He sighed. "Fine, I'll talk to him."

"And not ruin it?"

"And not ruin it. I promise."

With a brilliant grin, she flung her arms around his neck and hugged him. "I knew I could trust you with this. Thank you."

"Yeah, whatever. Where is he?"

"This way."

Zen turned to look at them when they came in. "Kitty?"

"Bobby can answer all your questions. Just...uh...tell him what's wrong, and he'll help you out. I promise. If he acts like a jerk, let me know. Kay? Bye!" With that, she shoved Bobby into the room and slammed the door behind him.

Silence filled the small space like water rushing into an empty vessel. Zen stared at Bobby, his unnerving green eyes not blinking.

Clearing his throat, Bobby stepped warily into the room. "Um, Kitty told me you were having boy problems?" he asked before taking the armchair across from Zen. Some of the stiff tension in Zen's muscles seemed to ease when he sat, and the nagging guilt in the back of Bobby's mind reared its ugly head. He thinks I'm going to hurt him. Even months later, Zen was still tense around all the students who used to bully him.

"So what's wrong?"

"My body is malfunctioning."

Bobby bit his tongue to keep from laughing. "Malfunctioning?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"Three days ago, my penis became ridged. Over the course of the last three days, it has happened four more times. I've also woken up wet from nocturnal ejaculations." All of this was said in a near robotic monotone that made it almost impossible for Bobby to control himself. Dear Lord, no wonder Kitty couldn't deal with this.

Forcing down the hysterical laughter that made his abs ache from holding it in, he tried to keep a straight face. "Right. That's not a malfunction. Congratulations, you're a man now."

Zen blinked at him. "I have always been male."

"No, I mean now you're not a kid any more. You're going through puberty."

Instead of asking what puberty was like Bobby expected, Zen shook his head. "I am fully grown. My body went through puberty while I was in the growth chamber."

"Growth chamber?"

"My growth was accelerated. My body is fully grown and functional. What I am experiencing is a malfunction. Not puberty."

Bobby tried to wrap his mind around that before dismissing it as another unexplainable mystery of Zen. "Okay then. So, you've never had an erection before? Do you even know what they are?"

"Yes, an enlarged and rigid state of the penis, typically in sexual excitement."

"Right," Bobby rolled his eyes at the textbook answer. "See, perfectly normal."

Zen's lips twitched into a slight frown. "No. It isn't. I am incapable of experiencing sexual excitement."

It was Bobby's turn to frown. "Incapable? What do you mean?"

"Sexual excitement is a form of emotion, and I have been stripped of emotion. I cannot feel anything. So the rigid state of my penis must be due to some sort of physiological malfunction."

Something close to a whimper escaped Bobby's lips as he raked his fingers through his hair. Talking to Zen was like trying to talk to an android. It was crazy. "Fine, you can't feel anything, but your body is reacting to something. What was happening the first time you 'malfunctioned'." He added air quotes to the last word.

"Pietro duct taped me to the ceiling of the Great Room when Jean entered the room."

Bobby nodded. "Makes sense, she's pretty hot."

Again Zen shook his head. "Logan followed after and grabbed her arm. They spoke. He kissed her."

The blunt words were spoken without inflection, but Bobby saw something flash in Zen's eyes, something that had little to do with androids and everything to do with emotion. "You didn't like him kissing her?"

"No."

"But your body reacted to the sight?"

"Yes."

Closing his eyes, Bobby sighed. Why did he have to play psychologist to the emotionally challenged? This was so unfair. "Were you thinking about Logan the other times your body reacted?"

"Not Logan."

"Jean?"

"No," a hint of emotion flavored the word, and Bobby realized Zen didn't like Jean. He forced his eyes open and looked at the assassin.

"Who?"

"X."

"But X is Logan," Bobby pointed out. Again that slight flash of emotion filled the dead green eyes.

"No, he's not. They are different."

"All right, so you have feelings for X." Bobby said.

"I do not have feelings."

A frustrated sigh exploded out of Bobby's lips. "You keep saying that, but I don't think it's true."

Zen's face blanked, all the hints and flashes of emotion vanishing. "Emotion is weakness. My Wielder did not want a weapon with such an inherent weakness as his weapon. During my training, my mind was stripped away until nothing remained. They removed my ability to feel emotion, and replaced it with extensive training."

Cold more biting than his mutation slid down his spine at Zen's words. What would that have been like, to lose everything you ever were? He shivered, hating the sudden sympathy he felt for Zen. He could see why Kitty was so protective of him now. He was just so damned pathetic, yet at the same time so tragically terrifying.

"So your ability to feel emotion was taken away from you. Maybe it's starting to come back?"

"That's not possible."

"Why not?"

Silence met the question, and Bobby smiled. Maybe he was getting somewhere. "What did you think when you saw Logan kissing Jean?"

"I wanted to kill her."

Bobby gaped at him before forcing his expression back to normal. The kid was an assassin after all, wanting to kill people for annoying him was a reasonable response. But the cold way he said it forced the teen to remember who and what he was dealing with. It also put the foolishness of his prior behavior into perspective. He'd never thought of himself as a stupid person before, but he couldn't help think it now. How else could he think of himself after realizing he'd been playing pull the tiger's tail for months and was beyond lucky the creature hadn't turned and bitten his face off?

"Right, uh, you aren't actually going to kill her, right?" He couldn't help but ask.

"No, I am not permitted to purposefully harm the staff or students."

Bobby nodded, "Moving along. Did you feel any physical reactions to the kiss?"

"Yes. I felt pain in my chest first. Then heat filled me. I thought my power was punishing me, but it remained dormant."

"Hmm. Think back, have you ever had strange physical reactions before during other situations?"

Zen closed his eyes and focused, with his eyes shut, he began speaking. "Yes. When Kitty cries it feels like I have a mild case of food poisoning."

Bobby laughed, making Zen's eyes snap open and lock on him again.

"Sorry. So your stomach hurts when Kitty cries."

"Yes. I don't understand why since it doesn't correlate to anything I might have eaten."

A smile tried to form on Bobby's lips, but he forced it back. "Anything else?"

"During live testing of Weapon X, I was forced to watch but not intervene. One of the obsolete weapons he went up against could breathe fire. The weapon burned X, and I could do nothing to stop it. My chest hurt, even though I had not been wounded during the confrontation."

All the laughter died in Bobby while he listened. Again, reluctant pity filled him. "Did they ever test you?"

"Yes. My testing was done in the compound. I fought several convicts to the death before I fought X."

Unable to help himself, Bobby asked, "Who won?"

"X did. That's the first time he bit me."

"Bit you?"

Instead of answering, IX pulled the sleeve of his shirt down, revealing the old bite marks.

"Shit, that's, how could you let him do that to you?" he asked, revulsion making his stomach tight as he stared at the lacework of scars. So many he couldn't even count them. All old.

But then he saw the way Zen's fingers stroked over the mark. "Zen?" He whispered, trying to understand the boy he'd blindly hated for so long.

"X is a feral, and he is driven to mark me. It," Zen paused, unable to find the words to explain.

"You like it when he bites you."

"Yes."

Bobby rubbed his temple, wishing the growing headache would go away. To think, he could still be sleeping right now. "Different strokes for different folks I guess," he said, unable to look away from the painful looking scars. He couldn't imagine enjoying that, but the way Zen touched the marks almost made him blush. It reminded him of the way Pyro had stroked a hicky he'd gotten on a date once, only far more intense.

"Okay, I believe they managed to take your emotion away, but I also think they couldn't get rid of your ability to feel completely. I think that even in the beginning you had some emotion, like how your chest hurt during the testing. What they took away was your mind's ability to process the emotion. So, you only feel the physical effects of the emotion, instead of the whole thing. Make sense?"

Zen nodded, not looking convinced, but willing to listen.

Bobby grinned. "See, I think you've been into X for a long time, and when you saw Logan kissing Jean, you felt jealous. Then you finally realized how much you want X, and now that your mind realizes it, your body is free to react." He spread his hands in a voila gesture.

"I don't know. If I have always felt this, shouldn't my body have reacted before?"

"Not necessarily. It probably took a while for the emotions to reconnect in your brain," Bobby said. "But, if something is malfunctioning, I'm sure Beast can take care of it."

An odd look slipped over Zen's face, like a cloud passing over the moon and was gone. "Perhaps you're right," he conceded.

"Great, now that that's settled, I'm going back to sleep. Next time you have a freak out, wait until noon, all right?"

"I will."

Bobby grinned, and then shook his head. For a second, he'd almost forgotten who he was talking too.

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

"—even more work for me! Mopping all night, like I haven't got enough to do! No, this is the final straw, I'm going to Dumbledore—"

The enraged voice drew Hermione out of her thoughts and paused her feet on the staircase, out of sight. Sharp foot falls marched down the hall away from her. Curiosity touched her, drawing her out of her despair as she rounded the corner to find a small lake of water covering the hallway outside of Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.

Without Filch's shrill voice echoing up and down the stone corridor, she could hear the higher wail of Myrtle. I may have lost my arm to the school, but at least I'm still alive, she thought. Now there was a monster roaming the so called safest school in the world, petrifying muggleborns, and she couldn't bring herself to care. Not when everything in her world had fallen to pieces.

Still, curiosity nagged at her, and instead of going back to her dorm room, she pushed open the door. "Myrtle?" she called out, having to raise her voice to be heard over the crying ghost.

She appeared to be hiding in her usual toilet, though it was hard to tell since the candles had been extinguished in the rush of water that left the walls, floor and ceiling soaked.

"Who's there?" Myrtle sobbed. "Come to throw something else at me?" The sob turned into a shrill scream of outrage as another gout of water rushed out of the toilet.

"No, I would never throw things at you. Why would I?" There were students who would throw things at her to amuse themselves, like Ron and his gang, but not her.

"Don't ask me" Myrtle shouted as she geysered up from the toilet. "Here I am, minding my own business, and someone thinks it's funny to throw a book at me…"

"I'm sorry to hear that. Did you see who it was?" she asked.

"I don't know. I was just sitting in the U-bend, thinking about death, and it fell right through the top of my head," Myrtle confided. "It's over there, it got washed out…"

Hermione looked under the sink where Myrtle pointed. There she found a small thin book with a sopping wet cover laying in a pool of toilet water. Taking out her wand, she muttered a spell to banish the water and glared halfheartedly at the stubborn puddle. Before she'd lost her arm, magic had come easy to her. It seemed like every spell she tried was a breeze. Well, maybe it had taken some time to master them, but nothing like this. Now she had to struggle to get even the first year spells to work right.

She hated the look in her Professors' eyes whenever a spell failed. It wasn't an angry look, which would have been better. Instead it was a mingled thing of guilt and pity. Every time she saw it, she wanted to shout at them not to look at her, to stop making it worse. But she never did, and probably never would.

Instead, like in class, she took a deep breath and tried the spell again. Slowly, the puddle dried, along with the small book.

Hermione slid her wand back into her pocket before she reached out to open the cover of the book with her wooden hand. The sight of the false limb no longer disgusted her, but it would never compare to her real one.

A quick glance revealed the empty pages of a diary belonging to T. M. Riddle. The faded cover showed the book to be fifty years old. I should give it to one of the professors.

No. Hermione stomped down on the instinctual thought as if it were a cockroach that tried to scurry over the toe of her shoe. They couldn't be trusted. Not with this, not with anything. Resolve stiffened her spine, and she shoved the tiny book down to the very bottom of her book bag.

And there, she forgot about it.

Thank you for reading, reviewing, adding this story to your favorites, and alerting.

Notes:

I want to dedicate this chapter to reader RenTenTen who gave me the inspiration for IX's new name with the following review:

Yay! I love your story. So, about IX's name... Kitty's picking it you say? Well that means it has to be cutesy. So obviously the first thing anyone attributes to Harry Potter is his bright green eyes. There are not a lot of boy names that are synonymous with the color green, there's Jade, and Sage, both of those are quite a bit girly though. And seeing as how you've characterized IX as being petite, mistaken by others as a possible female, but not personality-wise super effeminate, we could go with a unisex name. Something as ambiguous as the owner. Zen. Which has ties with the color green, but also means a state of calm. And we know that IX's only setting is calm/serious/almost-emotionless. :-)