Thanks to Tif S and Ally J Horan for reviewing.

Friday December the 21th 2018.

Kara POV

"Kara? Baby?"

The light reached through the dark of my dream one night. And for the first time in a thousand years I heard that one voice that had always meant the most.

"Kara? Come on. Get your nicest dress on. It's time to celebrate."

She was holding onto a yellow dress from the start, the nicest one I had ever owned, the one I had grown out of several years ago. But still, the night before my birthday every year it was always fitting again.

I carefully took the dress from mum's hands. Then all of a sudden it had turned from the yellow dress I had owned when I was five, until the onesie- white and with a print of balloons that she had bought right before my twelfth birthday. For me to wear it at every birthday.

She had a table right in front of her with a cake and several more kinds of biscuits. Bottles with juice and soda and everything it took to celebrate a birthday.

Then she started coughing all of a sudden, coughing that turned into vomiting that was choking her. And I could do nothing else than pull the onesie on.

Mum could have been ever so sick, it didn't matter as long as she was here with me.

"Kara?"

But a male's voice reached through the dream and she was gone again.

"Kara?" I couldn't tell through my sleep-ridden hearing who it was. But then heshook my shoulder and called for me to wake up. "Kara… I'll sing if you don't wake up now."

Okay! I couldn't let that happen!

I opened my eyes slowly. Then just as slowly stretched out my arms and legs to just make it last as long as possible. I didn't care for the sickness, my mum could have gotten sick a hundred times over and over just as long as she was here with me.

"I'm warning you. I'll sing…"

"I'm waking up." I managed to squeeze out through my still dry and sleep-ridden throat. "Don't sing."

While I was still stretching with sitting up I rubbed my eyes and saw my brother smirking back at me.

"Happy birthday!"

"Thank you." I sat up at last- I couldn't exactly say I liked my birthday, at least not since my mum died fourteen months ago. "But… can't we just forget about it?" Daniel had opened his bag, pulling up a birthday onesie- white and with a print of balloons. "I left that home on purpose you know!"

Daniel only smirked, he knew how much I hated this onesie. But fact remained that it was my mum who had gotten it for me to wear on my birthday So could I ever really hate it for real?

Could I even hate it when I'd finally gotten it on and found the slacks and sleeves at least one decimetre too short on each limp and I could barely close it.

I must have known I would have grown out of this sooner or later. But I hadn't been ready for it to happen only the second birthday after mum passed away.

It was like everything she had gotten for me once…

"It's okay." Daniel patted my shoulder. "You wear it like that today, I'm sure there's something that can be done about it. Maybe cut off a piece and make it into a print of another, big enough shirt… Perhaps you could ask Cassie about that."

I didn't answer, but I managed to close the onesie while my brother was watching me while he paced back and forth in the room. In that one way I knew about it.

"Does your legs hurt?" He didn't answer- he sort of never did! He had Cerebral Palsy and was often in pain. This cold didn't exactly make him any better. "Perhaps I can ask Cassie about that. And if there is a way to warm this room, then without heating up the rest of the house too."

"And what would you think dad would think about that?" Daniel nodded backwards towards our dad who laid alone on the only king-sized bed in our hotel room. "He loves sleeping in cold rooms as long as he can have like fifty different blankets, three beanies and a pair of gloves and a pair of mittens." Daniel sighed deeply. If dad wanted to play a happy family, then this was the way it would have to be.

"I suppose everything we can really do now is to go downstairs and let the day begin." I said with another look towards my dad, then my voice went lower and I felt something form in my throat. "…Do you think he'll remember what day it is today?"

"I don't know… But we are in a house full of people so I'm about to let everyone know if one way or the other." Daniel gave me a quick hug. "Happy birthday Kara. Now come on, I'm freezing to death in here."

Once we came out of the room, the one we had been given all three and into the hallway I could right away feel the heat coming through the hallway and from the kitchen and living room. I had just been thinking that it seemed like in the middle of the night. But it couldn't have been but I could hear voices from downstairs and going there I found the big family that had the room next to ours, and a dark-skinned girl who seemed to have the same kind of relationship with her dad that I would have liked to have with mine.

I didn't need to watch them for a second to notice the way he held his arm around his daughter, how she leaned against his chest, into his embrace as if the safest person in the world. Something like the way Daniel made me feel, but I was reminded slightly that he had his own problems when I could, in the corner of my eye that he was in the room while I turned to Cassie that was about to take something out of the oven.

"Good morning to you two." She greeted us. "Have you slept tonight?"

"Oh yes," Daniel answered before I had the time to come up with an answer, at least the bed was big and soft. "And that bed was so lovely. What do you say Kara?" I nodded agreeing, I had wrapped myself in those covers and not woken up all night.

"That's a very nice… dress." An older woman, by the table with who seemed to be her husband and four young kids. "Are you celebrating something?"

"Eh…"

I hesitated some. It wasn't like this was my favourite day of the year, especially since my mum died fourteen months ago. But Daniel was right next to me and he sent me a meaning look telling me about that there would be no way he would let me forget all about it. So I I turned a bit and there was suddenly completely empty behind me.

And I wasn't sure if I preferred empty, or the person that now came heavily walking up the stairs.

"Good morning dad." Daniel greeted. "Are you up already?"

Dad only grumbled for an answer. I couldn't even see how he was awake already now…

"Would you like some coffee?" Cassie asked him. "You can sit down here… on any chair that isn't already taken."

Dad only grumbled a bit more, then slumped down into a chair. It seemed as if he was half asleep already I would have asked whether we could take some sanwitches, tea or yoghurt with us upstairs so that Daniel wouldn't have had to fight his way down the stairs when his legs hurt so bad.

"Take that stupid… thingh off." He suddenly grumbled towards me. "I do get that your mum got it for you…. Bt that doesn't matter. She won't come back and you can stpop wearing that ol thing." I know it's your birthday but it doesn't matter. You can't wear that ugly thing even then."

"Oh, it's your birthday?" Cassie asked, I nodded carefully. As if I moved too fast it would hurt. "Happy birthday Sweetie. Now, I don't think what you're wearing is ugly at all. And it fits for today, in a weather like this especially. I even think my late husband got just the same for Grace." She nodded towards her daughter who sat on the other side of the table. "We never ended up using it but, if it's alright with you and alright with Grace I can go and find it. Maybe it will turn out to be a bigger size. So you can use that while I can see if something can be done to that one."

It took me a little while to just hear what she said and see the way Grace had smiled at me.

Then I looked down on the onesie and wondered what mum would have said about it. Something about sharing and caring probably!

"I mean… " I hesitated. "If you're sure it's okay… I mean, if your late husband got it for Grace."

"I never ended up using it." Grace herself explained. "It was way too big because it was only there in one size… the next year… well, I know. That had daddy been here… well, happy birthday."

I couldn't help the small smile that had formed on my lips. After all, I knew mum had wanted me to wear this onesie so badly…

No matter what dad said!

"Plus- it's almost Christmas…" Grace continued and then left the table. "I'll go upstairs and see if I can find it and you… you just get yourselves some breakfast. And mum, make sure everyone are fed."

I had barely even managed to notice there was a whole buffet of different breakfast foods right in front of me. Everything I could see was the dad and daughter I had seen when I first came into the room, and they were starting to notice I was watching them.

"Happy birthday…" The girl said, but with a suspicious look on her face and I couldn't blame her. "…But why are you staring at me like that?"

"I… I…." I tried to come up with some lie quickly. "…Sorry, I was dreaming away and ended up staring right ahead. Sorry. I do that all the time… I don't think we've met before. My name is Kara…." I looked to my side and decided to continue. "This is my brother Daniel."

The girl right ahead peered a bit, she didn't seem certain, neither would I have been if I had been her. It took her several seconds, but at last she answered, speaking slowly and hesitating.

"I and my dad only arrived here last night… Well, I was sleeping then so I didn't meet anyone… my name is Keira, this is my dad Mitchell."

I couldn't help but notice how similar our names were, and was just about to say it when Cassie interrupted with a tray of muffins she put in front of us.

"Here. I think it's time for you to eat, right?" Keira nodded but was silently looking down on the tray and then towards the glass bottle of milk Cassie had too. "Your dad told me about your diet. I think these are okay to eat now. And he also told me your favorites for breakfast. Muffins and milk…. So I thought, as a start to your diet I could make something just like it." She put a plate on the bench with a load of muffins and a jug of something that looked like milk, but I had a feeling it wasn't. "These are keto-friendly spinach and goat cheese egg muffins, along with almond milk… Now, these are made especially for Keira but if anyone else wants a taste there is plenty of enough for everyone."

"I want to try!" One of the girls- the oldest one as it seemed. "Can I?"

"Of course."

"Be careful Taylor." The old woman said when the one obviously named Taylor reached for a muffin and a glass that Cassie reached her. "You might not like it so don't put it all into your mouth at once."

"Are you sure this will work?" Mitchell asked Cassie. "Ketogenic diet isn't like a regular LCHF… We're just getting ready of what kinds of fat we can eat and how much. If it's one single gram wrong…" He turned pale, Keira seemed more secure and had filled up their glasses and taken each muffin.

"We're never going to know if we don't try… a Christmas without seizures… that would make the best gift ever."

Silence fell around the table, Keira still sat and stared on her muffin but hadn't taken a bite yet. It was as if she was afraid of something but she didn't look afraid neither. Next to me Daniel had sat down and taken some regular breakfast waffles, chocolate chips and milk and then passed them over to me.

"How could any other breakfast be good enough for the birthday girl?" He smirked slightly and was speaking too quietly for anyone else to hear all of it. "And just so you know. I saw the look on mum's face when she bought you that onesie. And it doesn't matter to me what dad or anyone else thinks of it." ¨

As on a given signal Grace was just returning into the kitchen and as she held up the onesie that looked the same as the too small one I was already wearing.

"Thanks" I mumbled. "I'll go and change…"

When I stood up, still without eating anything my dad grumbled something that was just barely even noticeable.

"That ugly thing…"

It seemed he had actually forgotten the reason I wore it.

Alice POV

"Peek-a-boo…."

Our second oldest grandchild was sitting on the other side of her grandfather, playing with our youngest who smiled, chuckled and yodled in happy baby- language. "Peek-a-boo… Peek-a-boo… Taylor please. Can't you play with Elsa for a while so I can eat? And get off that phone!" Taylor glared at her sister and didn't put the phone, that she had only gotten when school started this year. "Come on! I'm hungry!"

"You're always hungry!" Taylor answered and was still looking down into her phone. "And you started playing with her yourself."

"But she always wants to…"

"You two! Cut it out." I took the last piece of mango I had taken. "I'll take her… but Taylor, get off that phone!" She rolled her eyes. "I saw that! And if you do that again you're not coming out of our hotel room anymore until we'll leave this place."

"And who knows how long that will take." Taylor whined. "If the weather stays this bad, there's just no point with only the two hours it would take for us to get home."

"That includes you too if you don't put that phone down."

"Good morning." Before I had had the time to think of anything to say Cassie was standing by our table. "Did everyone have a nice breakfast and a good night?" We all nodded agreeing. "And you?" She turned to Remi mostly. "Did it help you sleep? Warm milk with some lavender, honey and vanilla?"

"It did!" Remi had had trouble sleeping for as far back as she could remember. She hadn't quite believed when we came here that anything Cassie made could help her. "I think I fell asleep first. That's never happened before!"

"You did!" My husband- her grandfather continued. "We went in to check in their room a couple of times. The first time two were still up and trying to think of prank to pull on their middle sister. The second and third they were all out like candles…"

"And the baby?"

We had figured one room would be a bit too small for six people, and even more so if Elsa woke up fussing in the night. So while Taylor, Remi and Cammie shared one room with one large bed. I and my husband had the room right next-door with Elsa in a cot right next to us.

"Awake every three hours for some formula- like a clock!"

I smiled and was happy that Elsa didn't have any colic like Taylor and Cammie had had, she was asleep for most of the night and everything I and William had to do was to keep count on which one of us had been up last…

And I was happier, more than anything that someone had finally found anything that could help our Remi sleep.

It was right then the girl from before- Kay or whatever her name was (I had literally always been the worst at remembering names) still wearing a onesie printed with balloons but of a bigger size this time and it reminded me of what had been said before.

"Happy birthday Sweetie… Hang on. I don't think I can remember quite your name right."

"It's Kara… thanks."

Kara did look like she wanted to cry most of all, and looking towards who must be her father where he sat by the table and angrily, tiredly staring down into his coffee grumbling about something I couldn't hear or understand.

I wasn't about to stop my grandchildren from tasting anything, I just wasn't that type of human. But when Taylor did want to try some muffins that Cassie put in front of us, and they were obviously a part of a diet for the dad and daughter on the other side of the table, I couldn't help but see in front of me some times that Taylor wanted to taste something all at once- didn't like it and ended up throwing it all up when she didn't like it.

And she was so picky when it came to food.

"Be careful Taylor." I tried to warn her. "You might not like it so don't put it all into your mouth at once."

To be honest I didn't expect her to like it. But when she tasted a big smile formed on her lips.

"Yum! They taste good. If all food you eat taste like this I can totally join you!"

Not that Taylor would be able to keep off her candy though. But I could understand enough of what the two on the other side of the table said to know that it was more about food and something much, much worse.

"I have to say it's a good thing I have a whole folder with recipes of different diets. Of course, We are always doing our best to make everyone feel like home here at Grey House."

"So what if they don't like it at home?" Cassie just smiled at Cammie's question. "I like it at home, but I don't think all people do… I like it here too I and my sisters and nana and grandpa. We don't really live far away from here but the distance in the car felt like a million hours away… I don't know where the other people that live here are actually from…"

"Well…" When Cammie finally stopped talking Cassie finally started. "I do know some people don't like it at their home. But for those we do a bigger harder try to make them feel good here."

"That's a good thing to do!"

We were laughing and talking and really learning how this place had people coming and going everywhere, right now came in a girl with dark brown hair that I had just barely passed in the hallway before.

"Hello…" The whole family was about to finish off their breakfast, and the girl about to start hers, but I could just as well start a conversation as the social grandma I was. "My name is Alice. This is my husband, and our grandchildren…" The girl nodded at me. "Are you alright? This weather isn't getting you too down is it?..." She had gone awfully pale- almost grey, and I almost expected what was coming before she suddenly span around and started heaving and throwing up into the sink. "Oh."

I hurried to my feet- mummy-mode kicking in right away, and it seemed Cassie's had too while Remi and Taylor had started making disgusted noises at it.

"You two! Cut that out… She's embarrassed enough as it is! If you've finished your breakfast then just go away. Here, Elsa." I handed the baby over to her grandfather. "You're going over to grandpa for a bit."

Without waiting for anything else I let go of Elsa and hurried over to the sink where the girl was still throwing up and Cassie rubbing her back and holding her hair back as she continued heaving.

"All I can say…" The girl said shakily when the heaving finally stopped. "Is at least it's not contagious…" She ended up taking several, deep breaths. When she rubbed her stomach, over the lowest part it wasn't hard for me to figure what this actually was. And it was not a stomach flu or food poisoning! "I'm sorry Cassie. I should have learnt something from the first time and stopped this…"

"You have really not got anything to feel sorry or embarrassed about." Cassie said kindly. "You go sit down. I'll bring you some water and ginger popsicles- they'll help against the nausea."

"Come." I kept my arm around the girl's shoulders and kindly led her to back away from the sink when she was just putting the water on running. "Don't worry about that…"

"You go sit down. George can take care of this."

"Okay…" The girl, who I realized I still didn't know the name of finally let herself be led back towards the table where she could sit down. "I had hoped my son and fiancé could be the first ones to know about this…" That last sounded like she was speaking to herself mostly. "Oh well… I'm guessing you've probably guessed it by now."

At least Remi and Taylor had left the room, William was playing with Elsa and Cammie was watching the girl as she sat down in between me and him.

"Hmm…" The girl said, her voice still shaky but louder than before. "Alice was it?" I had totally forgotten I had told her my name. "And your grandchildren?"

"That would be correct!" As if I didn't know what morning sickness was I ran my hand over her forehead. "I don't know your name but I can spot a mother's intuition when I see it, when are you due?"

"My name is Sarah… I haven't had the time to go to the doctor's yet but I'd guess- by the end of July, beginning of August maybe… The summer seems so far away with weather like this!" She rubbed her belly again. "I want you in there and growing for nine more months… But I can't wait to meet you still… my baby girl."

I noticed something…

"Isn't it a bit too soon to know the gender? Very much too soon actually."

"I just know it's a girl… And I just knew it was a boy when I was pregnant the first time. Then I had Eric…" She smirked slightly. "He's three, four in May."

"And this is the part of the pregnancy that you forget all about. When you're just so happy- happier than you ever could know before."

Cassie came and put a jug of water and a glass with some popsicles in front of Sarah.

"These are some ginger popsicles, also with mint. And with C-vitamin…"

"That must mean I can have a whole lot of them."

"I'll bring some to your room so you can have some as soon as you wake up and we won't have any more mis happenings like these."

"You mean that I came puking at the breakfast table and half of the ones actually getting to eat their breakfast…" Sarah seemed to think about something. "…Gosh! I should have known this would happen."

"Did you have a lot of morning sickness with your son?"

"Eurgh… more like all-day-long-sickness." She commented a bit rudely. "I'm sorry. I know I'm being rude… Being this far away from home doesn't exactly put me in the best of moods to start with… And now when I'm stuck." She got up on still a bit shaky legs and paced a bit back and forth. "Sorry, I'm just a bit restless… and homesick! And isn't rudeness what us Swedes are known for anyway?"

Swede? That could explain why she was in a bad mood… It would put me in a bad mood, a thousand times worse than hers if I was half the world away from my home and with no way of getting home.

"I wonder if that dog owner would like me to walk her dog?" She thought out loud. "I think North Swedes are about the only people that still live in this kind of weather. "I guess I'll go and ask her."

"After getting sick…" Cassie started. "I think you should at least have something to eat except for popsicles. Like a sandwich or some fruits and yoghurt. I've also made some keto-waffles for someone here that's on a certain diet. Or I'm making some waffles for a birthday girl among us."

"I think some fruits and yoghurt will be just fine… But that does sound good… and I can never stay in a bad mood after being outside walking… Whose birthday was it you said?"

I had really forgotten all about what morning sickness and how it could come and go…

"And by the way… I know you noticed…" Sarah threw with her head and her dark-brown hair over her shoulder. "We're not all blonde and blue-eyed."

Sarah went to get some actual food, and I suddenly noticed that while his older sisters had actually left the room when I ordered them to. William was still happily playing peek-a-boo with Elsa, and Cammie had been watching back and forth to whoever was talking at the moment. And while he had done that he ended up looking more and more confused.

"Why would she say that last?" I tried to think of a good answer that didn't sound racist but that would still explain it to him. "And where it's Swedennie?"

"It's Sweden…" I explained. "….And it's far, far, far away from here. Some people think that all people from there should have blonde hair and blue eyes?"

It wasn't like Cammie looked confused any less…

"How many people are there in Swedennie?"

I tried to think…

"I have no idea. But I'll look it up when we come home."

"It would be weird if all people in one place would all look the same."

I really had never thought about it before. But Cammie, as a three year old boy did have a way with stating the most obvious things people were all thinking.

If I ever went to "Swedennie" I'd have to look around and actually come to a conclusion about whether all people there were actually blonde and blue eyed or not.

Jason POV

Most of my second morning at Grey House had passed.

…"I needed to find some way to get away from… people. And I found this. But I don't have much money."

"That's okay." I was hiding behind the wall without even realizing I was hiding while the smile could almost be heard in her voice. "We won't be throwing anyone out on the street. And if you can't pay us now then we can make always make a deal afterwards… Thank you for being honest with me."

"I promise I won't be staying without paying for… week after week. I'll be paying as soon as I have…. Well, money."

"And I promise that a room here you can see as yours for as long as you need. Here, this is George and he can help you carry your things upstairs…"

I had heard that voice, as long as begging for help on a snowy, dark Wednesday night inside so many times before. And I recognized from more than just the tone of how much the person having it needed help.

I wanted to fly downstairs. Take Charlie in my arms, apologize with all of me of how I had screwed things up after everything she had done for me and promise her that now I could make everything alright- be able to keep every promise.

Instead, I ran up the hallway before she had the time to see me, locked myself in the room and so collapsed right on the floor where I was.

"Hello…" Here I was, on Friday, sometime in between breakfast and lunch the owner of this place came knocking on my room door and came in carrying a tray with a cup of tea, some grilled cheese sandwiches and a bowl of yoghurt with cereal and pineapple. "I didn't see you much yesterday, and even less right this breakfast. So I thought you might like some of this."

"This is amazing." I told her, but I couldn't hide the shiver in her voice. I was already sitting on the bed, but pushed myself up to sit and she came, sat on the edge and placed the tray in between us. "I haven't been much outside that door for the past forty eight hours. I came to have some waffles and soup though."

"Well, don't worry. Here at Grey House we always want our guests to feel like home. Right now the weather is so bad we can barely get outside the front door. But if you need anything then you can always come to me or George and we'll do our best." I nodded and tried to ignore the lump in my throat. "I can leave you al…"

"No." I interrupted Cassie before she had gone anywhere, "Sorry. I spoke a bit too quickly. It's just that… if you'd like to stay here…" I didn't quite know how to finish that sentence.

"You would like to talk… you don't have to… I've heard quite a lot of times that I'm easy to talk to so… whatever you want to say. Or if you don't want to say anything. I'm here."

"It's…" I started. "You know the girl that came two days ago? Charlie?" Cassie nodded. "Well… we've got some history together… And you could never imagine how much I screwed it up… It's a long story."

"I'm in no rush."

I took a deep, shaky breath. I knew where I was, at a bed and breakfast. If some other guest, Charlie or anyone else needed her help then it wouldn't matter what I said- she had even less time for me than what anyone else had had through my whole life.

But something in what Cassie had said other people had said was right- she was easy to talk to! We had barely greeted each other when I came here on Wednesday afternoon but something in the way she looked at me had me trusting her.

Then of course, people I had trusted had always let me down…

"I and Charlie met in school. Meanwhile I was also married to another girl named Alexa… And Alexa didn't like the thought of me having a best friend that was a , she seemed to get that she was the only one but still she always wanted to keep me from seeing Charlie. Which was hard of course since we were in school together. But any time except for that… Alexa was relieved when we graduated."

I sighed and realized exactly how much important I needed to put in.

"The thing was, during our school time I was going through some rough things. And while Alexa was nowhere to be seen Charlie was always there. Right by my side like nobody else ever were… Then after we graduated, we always knew each other and no one could change that. But Alexa made sure to me that she thought I should be with her…"

And if I'd ever known, or if I could just forget everything that had happened after that.

"…And Alexa didn't like Charlie… Alexa manipulated me into hurting Charlie and… I can just never forgive myself for some of the things I said… It would be easier if we could all just forget all of those things. Because I don't blame Charlie a bit for not talking to me after that. Then, quite a lot more recent Alexa… showed her ass! She did something I could never forgive and everything came out and here I am! Without girlfriend, without family, without my best friend... And that's the short version of a long story."

I would have expected that after telling Cassie- or anyone about what happened like this I would regret it. That whether I said something or not I'd end up regretting it. That was just the way I had always been…

Instead I felt weirdly relieved and empty in some way. As if the pain and something heavy had left me, the pit of my stomach, my heart and all of that aching.

And somehow I just knew that Cassie had been the right person to tell all along.

That had I told anyone else they'd probably be as angry at me as I was at myself. And no matter what happened they could never forget everything I had done to hurt them. No matter what they could never forget that they had been there for me but I couldn't be there for them.

"It's like it's a part of being human to be able to self-doubt." Cassie said after a long while of silence. "To be able to blame oneself for things we did in the past. Things we can't go back and change. Then, all we can do is to make sure we get it more right in the future as it comes… And then, we can decide ourselves how we rather would like to face it."

"It's not that simple." I couldn't help but blurt out. "I can't decide about how Charlie will react… She might never want to see me again… I wouldn't blame her."

"That's right. You can't… However, if like you said- you were best friends. Perhaps she would like to let go of what has been before. To make a future that will be better for the both of you. Because after all, you have got to have learnt from what happened before."

I silent for a long while, I was holding onto a grilled cheese sandwich but hadn't taken a bite in for certain half an hour-there was something else more important I needed to do.

"I… need to stop hiding in here, and go and talk to her. Don't I?"

"Meanwhile I have a ketogenic birthday cake about to make."

I think I'll end it there…

Random fact

My hair is brown and my eyes are green. But then I'm also half-Norwegian.

Edit as of December 15th 2023: Jason's story is changed slightly.