Author's Note:Hello everyone! I have gone back and forth with this chapter struggling with how I wanted to reunite everyone as well as tackle the issue of Aang's firebending teacher. Yes, Mira is more than capable and would be happy too, but part of the bonding and friendship Zuko and Aang share is from their training, the next chapters content, as well as part of the big reason he even joins Aang.
I hope this doesn't feel like a cop out, but I figured now would be a good time to address the more mature themes in this fic. Realistically politics etc are going to be a huge thing after the war. They touch on it a bit in the comics so I wanted to go into further detail. This is our first introduction to it with Mira actually shifting her focus to think about it. Something up until now she could largely ignore. What she lacks in bending ability she makes up for in random facts and knowledge. Like many of us she grew up with the internet and smart phones where you can answer any question you want in a matter of seconds, or sometimes minutes. I wanted to showcase this throughout the fic and we will definitely see more of it in the future as we watch Mira grow.
Also, Mira's future is going to involve a lot of politics as the Avatar, so might as well start dipping our toes in now and start addressing some potential future conflicts ;)
From here on out, Mira's bite and attitude will be more freed. She no longer has to keep under the radar and please Zuko, so lets see if he still likes her as much as he used too now that she doesn't have to hide or pretend. Trust me, their relationship was far from perfect and needs a lot of work. They have a lot of work to do if they want to ever get back to that point. My goal, as should everyone's, is to be in as healthy of a relationship as you can and as such, these two kiddos still have some growing to do. We saw some of Zuko's, and soon we will see more of Mira's.
~Chapter 11 Start~
The heat was unbearable as we walked. I wiped the sweat from my brow with a soft sigh. We were all tired, sore, bruised, and beaten down. No one had said anything since we had landed, even Appa and Momo seemed to be in low spirits. The loss at the Fire Nation capital had hit us all hard. It was difficult not to look at it as a failure, we were all just kids after all. What did that say about the world that we were its only actual hope? The thought caused a feeling of deja vu to bloom in my chest, blossoming into a pit in my stomach.
"This is humiliating." Katara sighed as she swept her brow, finally breaking the silence.
"Do you mean getting thoroughly spanked by the Fire Nation, or having to walk all the way to the Western Air Temple?" Sokka asked as he gave her a sour look.
"Both." Katara said as she cast Sokka a glare.
"Sorry, guys. But Appa gets tired carrying all these people." Aang explained, giving Appa a small pat.
"I wonder how the rest of the troops are." I heard someone ask from the back of the group.
"They're probably on their way to a prison. Seems like my dad just got out. Now he's going back in." Haru sighed somewhere near my left.
My mind felt like it was surrounded in a haze. I wasn't sure if it was the heat, the adrenaline wearing off, or the fact I had faced Sadar and almost died a second time. The only real saving grace for me today was that I never ran into Zuko. I brushed my fingers through my hair, the sensation causing me to close my eyes. The sun was bearing down on us like a vice, reminiscent of the Fire Nation in a way.
"I miss Pipsqueak." The Duke admitted, his face scrunching up and bleeding together with whomever he was speaking too.
I shook my head realizing that perhaps the heat was starting to get to me. Pulling out my flask I took a sip of water and contemplated our situation. Our cover was long blown so nowhere was safe anymore. We would most likely have to stay on the run if we couldn't find somewhere safe soon. No doubt the Fire Nation was hot on our trail. They had us cut off from our support networks, as well as from the ocean. The further we headed inland the easier it would be to get caught.
"I miss not having blisters on my feet." Sokka whined, oblivious to our actual danger.
"I once stepped onto a hot stone, now that was pretty bad." I blurted out, the heat beginning to swirl inside my head.
"A hot stone?" Sokka asked.
"Yeah, in my time we have these huge rooms filled with steam using electricity instead of steam on rocks, although we still use those too. I was at a friend's place using their parent's sauna and messing around when I slipped on some condensation and...burned the shit out of my foot on one of the heaters. The blisters were so bad I couldn't walk for a week." I shuddered at the memory.
"That does not sound pleasant." Sokka deadpanned.
"Hey, we're here! I can feel it!" Toph cheered as she interrupted our discussion..
"Uhh...I think your feet need their eyes checked." Katara said.
"No, she's right. We are here." Aang smiled knowingly.
"Wow...it's amazing!" Toph gasped.
We all mounted Appa and flew down to find the upside down buildings built into the cliff's edge. Sure enough, Toph was right. An air temple was situated underneath the cliffside. A bead of hope ebbed its way into my mind and I felt myself smile for the first time all day. This place was sure to be safe from the Fire Nation. We moved towards a large overhanging balcony and I took a moment to appreciate the intricate carved marble and stone.
"Wow, this is absolutely amazing." I gaped in awe.
We landed on a landing with a fountain that flowed off the ledge and into the abyss below. I looked down and let out a whistle at how long the drop was. Not only that, but the water that supplied the water fountain was moving water that let out over the edge of the balcony through intricate pipework. I was suddenly reminded of the Baigong pipes and chucked to myself. Guess I was right and Naia was wrong after all.
"It's so different from the Northern Air Temple. I wonder if there are any secret rooms." Teo spoke as he wheeled himself towards one of the entrances to the inner temple.
"Wanna explore?" I grinned, the mood suddenly feeling lighter.
Or was that just the temperature?
"Always." Aang grinned as he hopped off Appa with a wide smile.
"Let's go check it out." Haru said, leading us all towards the inner part of the buildings.
The Duke followed after them as Aang and I were blocked from following by Katara. She stood before him, her arms grossed and her gaze sympathetic and motherly. I could tell this wasn't her asking, it was something about her posture. I felt much like I did when my mother had caught me doing something wrong, it was creepy how well Katara could play mother.
"You guys go. I think we need to talk about some things." Katara said as she gave me a pointed look.
"I'll race you Duke." Teo challenged as he sped off.
"I told you, it's The Duke." He complained as he followed after.
"Why can't I go?" Aang asked with a pout.
"We need to decide what we're going to do now. And since you're the Avatar, maybe you should be a part of this." Katara explained.
"She's right, even though it sucks." I shrugged, taking a seat on the fountain.
"Fair enough," Aang grumbled, "so...what's the new plan?"
"Well, if you ask me, the new plan is the old plan. You just need to master all four elements and confront the Fire Lord before the comet comes." Sokka explained.
"Oh, yeah, that's great. No problem, I'll just do that." Aang huffed as he flicked a rock away.
"Aang, no one said it's going to be easy." Katara tried to soothe.
"Well it's not even going to be possible. Where am I supposed to get a firebending teacher?" Aang continued to whine.
I coughed and everyone turned to me. I summoned a small ball a fire with a pointed nod.
"Oh yeah, right, sorry Mira, I forgot you were a firebender there for a moment." Aang laughed as he turned red.
"Things will work out, we will be a team through and through, we'll teach you firebending and then kick his Fire Lord ass." I grinned before placing a comforting hand on Aang's shoulder.
"Well, since that's all worked out, why don't we take a nice tour around the temple." Aang grinned as he jumped up.
And with that, Aang took off on his glider, Momo following after him. I turned to see spirit Aang looking at me from where Aang had jumped off. He was giving me a soft smile as he stroked his beard. I turned back towards Katara, Sokka, and Toph so I could excuse myself for a moment.
"Hey guys, gimme a moment. I just need to check on something." I said as I stood up.
I followed Aang around the corner and found him seated cross-legged. He motioned for me to do much of the same. As I sat down I peered up at Aang's aged face with curiosity and excitement. It had been awhile since I had seen him last, my guiding Avatar.
"What's up with them?" I heard Sokka ask, his voice muffled by the distance.
"I dunno, Avatar stuff?" Toph responded.
"What's up?" I asked, focusing to tune my friends' discussion out.
"Someone in the Spirit World needs to speak with you, if you can meditate and cross over." Aang smiled soothingly.
"Oh, uh, sure." I blinked as I took position and evened out my breathing.
When I opened my eyes next, I was in our field, but was not alone. Iroh was standing there with a soft smile causing me to gasp. I reached out almost afraid to move and cause him to disappear.
"Iroh?" I gasped, tears started to fall as I rushed towards him.
He enveloped me in a warm hug and chuckled. I could feel his breath in my hair as if he was real, but knew by the tell-tale shimmering aura that he was a spirit, much like Aang was. He wasn't the Iroh who was still alive now, but I still knew him all the same.
"Hello my dear, it's certainly been awhile." He spoke into my hair.
"How and why are you here?" I asked, causing Iroh to chuckle.
"That is a story for another day, I'm here to talk to you about Aang's firebending teacher." He said.
"Firebending teacher? But I'm going to be his teacher." I blinked, not sure where Iroh was going with this.
"I know, which is why we need to talk. This is one of those decisions in life that can have a lasting impact. Aang is meant to be taught by my nephew, and before you start, please understand that I am not the Iroh you lost as a prisoner to the Fire Nation. I am simply Iroh the spirit, visiting his long lost niece." He smiled.
"Excuse me, what?" I asked, perplexed by everything he was saying.
"It's a long story and we do not have time, but I will tell you this. I am a spirit in your time. I have been for thousands of years. I watched over you and made sure you were as safe as possible, because I knew one day you would be here. But you can't teach Aang firebending. That is Zuko's destiny, one he should have recently come to accept. It is a fate he must fulfill because even once my brother is gone, the people and their anger will remain. My brother will become a martyr for them. Zuko must earn his place as Fire Lord, and lead his people through example. His friendship and bond with Aang is important for his people to come to accept a new way of peace instead of war." Iroh explained.
"Iroh, do you have any idea what you are asking of me?" I asked, finally looking him in the eyes.
"I'm asking you to trust me. You do not have to forgive my nephew, goodness knows he doesn't deserve it right now, but please trust me that this is an important decision for you to make. I will see you again my dear, remember that I love you as if you were my own." Iroh smiled as the world faded from view.
I was back at the Western Air Temple breathing heavily. I looked towards Aang with an accusing look. My emotions were swirling inside of me, battling it out to see which one would guide my next words.
"You were friends with Zuko, weren't you." I hissed as both anger and hurt won.
"I was." Aang admitted, taking my anger and diffusing it into nothing.
"How can you two ask this of me?" I cried as the hurt inside me bubbled up and into tears.
"Because we know you can handle it." Aang soothed, before fading from view.
I sat there crying for the next few minutes, attempting to collect my composure. Did that mean Zuko was on his way here? Dear god, I wasn't sure what I was going to do if he was. I had just gotten through the invasion and had grown comfortable with the fact that I had at least avoided seeing him. Looks like it was the end of the line, I had nowhere left to run and now I had to face Zuko and my feelings. Just hopefully not today.
~Break~
When I returned I found that everyone, plus Appa, were missing. Sitting down with a sigh I realized they probably took off after Aang, worried. I heard voices and realized I had spoken too soon. Aang and Katara appeared turning towards me. Aang gave me a bright smile as he spotted me.
"Aang, we should be making plans for our future!" Sokka shouted.
"Okay, we can do that while I show you the giant Pai Sho table. Oh, you're going to love it, Mira." Aang smiled as everyone landed.
"I'm sure I will." I smiled.
"Oh, and you're all going to love the giant echo chamber." Aang continued as if Sokka hadn't spoken at all.
"I think that'll have to wait." Toph cut Aang off.
We looked at Toph expectantly as Appa moved out of the way and Toph pointed towards a doorway past the fountain. We followed her finger to see Zuko standing there. I froze on the spot, everything was surfacing all at once. I was in awe of seeing him after so long, starstruck at how...different he looked, and filled with such a rage my vision was beginning to bleed to white. I had many sleepless nights filled with this exact scenario, but daydreams and reality were two very different things.
"Hello, Zuko here. I-Ah!" Zuko spoke up before I interrupted him.
"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!" I seethed, rushing for him as Sokka caught me around the middle and pulled me back.
I let out a snarl of fire as I struggled in his grip. I couldn't contain the range of emotions I was experiencing. The duality of how I felt left me reeling and unable to grasp at a rational thought. So, I struck out like a wild animal, snarling and angry. My stomach began to hurt where Sokka had me pinned against his chest as he tried to stay upright. Sokka was strong, but hadn't fully grown into his adult height yet and so it was awkward for him to hold me up and against him.
"Put me down man bun!" I hissed as Sokka just about fell over.
"Uh...hey, I heard you guys flying around down here so...I just thought I'd wait for you...here." Zuko explained, not sure what to do with my outburst in the slightest.
Zuko's eyes flickered towards my raging form and I caught the smallest wince. Appa interrupted my next shriek by walking over and letting out a large roar causing Zuko to flinch away. I felt a smugness in my gut as I let out a bitter grin.
"Bite him Appa!" I cheered as the bison looked about ready to follow my instructions.
But then, it seemed he changed his mind and licked Zuko instead. My grin dropped into a pout as I felt my eyes begin to burn. I had to do something, anything, so I didn't burst into a blubbering mess. My anger no longer had an outlet; it traveled towards my eyes and threatened to spill forth to ease the building pressure.
"Traitor!" I hissed as tears hit my lashes.
Appa continued to lick him as all of us let our guard down, Sokka finally letting me go. I winced as I took my first free breath and stared wide eyed at the scene before me. Was Zuko actually being serious? I just about fell into a hunch as I caught my aching breath. My heart felt like it was on fire, threatening to combust a hole in my chest. I took a breath, and then another, steeling my nerves one more time.
"Are you serious?" I laughed as I turned around. "You seriously are! I gotta be high, no wait, dead, I am dead and this is my hell, isn't it!" I yelled at the ceiling as Iroh's words repeated in my head.
Even in his uncle's death he was looking out for his ungrateful ass. I wanted to yell at how undeserving Zuko was, but a look in his eyes halted the words the moment they began to burn a line down my tongue.
"I know you must be surprised to see me here." Zuko continued to speak as he watched me cautiously.
"Not really." Sokka and I said at the same time.
"Since you've followed us all over the world." Sokka continued.
"Right...well uh..." Zuko said as he looked away ashamed.
"Can confirm that happened, he dragged me along to do it." I snorted, feeling smug at his shame.
"Anyway, what I wanted to tell you about is that I've changed and I, uh, I'm good now. And, well, I think I should join your group. Oh and I can teach firebending. To you..see I, uh..." Zuko said as he looked directly at Aang.
"You wanna what now?" Toph asked, incredulous.
"You can't possibly think that any of us would trust you, can you? I mean how stupid do you think we are?" Katara seethed as she took an aggressive step forward.
"Yeah! All you've ever done is try to hunt us down and capture Aang, besides, Aang already has a firebending teacher." Sokka said, crossing his arms.
"Yeah, uh, about that. Communed with some spirits and they think it's a bad idea for me to teach him." I coughed as I looked away from everyone's accusing eyes.
"Wait what? Why?" Sokka backtracked, turning to me.
"Uhh...Avatar...stuff." I finished lamely.
"I've done good things. I mean, I could have stolen your bison in Ba Sing Se, but I set him free. That's something." Zuko pleaded as Appa gave him another lick.
"Seriously? That's the best you've got? Zuko, you've lied at every possible avenue. You've said you've changed before to just stay the same. No, to end up worse than before. You would have stolen Appa if Iroh and I didn't stop you, be honest." I glared as the angry vitriol spewed from my lips.
"But...Appa does seem to like him, he wouldn't do that if he was only released because of you and Iroh." Toph defended, looking unsure.
"He probably just covered himself in honey or something so Appa would lick him. I'm not buying it." Sokka argued back.
"Doubt his highness would ever want to get that dirty for any reason." I snorted, my glare still in its place but still unable to be directed at him.
"I can understand why you wouldn't trust me. And I know I've made mistakes in the past." Zuko said looking away again, his expression becoming more pained than ever.
My heart stuttered to my throat, lodging itself there and crying out to be acknowledged. I wanted to move towards Zuko and sooth him and soon my anger was directed at myself. He had no right to pull any strings with me now, intentional or not.
"Like when you attacked our village?" Sokka spat.
"Or when you stole my mother's necklace and used it to track us down and capture us?" Katara cut in.
"Or when you lied to me and Iroh, betraying us, and causing mine and Aang's death?" I finished, nailing in the final guilt nail.
It was easier to focus on my anger than Zuko's pain. Any sense, reason, or logic was abandoned the minute he stepped into my view. After everything he had done, how could he just walk right in and think it would be just gravy?
"Look, I admit I've done some awful things. I was wrong to try and capture you. I'm sorry that I attacked the Water Tribe. And I never should have sent that Fire Nation assassin after you. I'm going to try and stop him." Zuko apologized.
"Wait, you sent Combustion Man after us?!" Sokka shouted.
"Well, that's not his name, but..." Zuko began to say.
"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to insult your friend." Sokka mocked.
"He's not my friend!" Zuko ground out, his teeth grinding causing the tension in his jaw to become obvious.
I hated myself for being so attentive of Zuko still. It didn't feel like something he deserved anymore. It was frustrating how under my skin he had gotten, I was fighting old habits and felt even more sour than before. Time was supposed to heal all wounds, guess our seperation wasn't long enough.
"That guy locked me and Katara in jail and tried to blow us all up!" Toph yelled, finally losing her cool.
"Why aren't you saying anything? You once said you thought we could be friends. You know I have good in me." Zuko asked Aang, turning away from the rest of our angry gazes.
Aang looked towards us and like a coward I averted my gaze. I knew we had to accept Zuko, but I didn't want to, I wasn't ready too, Sokka shook his head no and I let out the breath I was holding. It was easier to let everyone else say no, because I knew if I had to answer I couldn't tell Aang what I wanted. No, he was owed the truth, the truth of what Spirit Iroh and Aang had told me. No matter how bitter I felt about doing so. But if everyone else disagreed about letting Zuko join, it wasn't my fault; or so it felt.
"There's no way we can trust you after everything you've done. We'll never let you join us." Aang declared, causing the tension to finally leave my body.
"You need to get out of here, now." Katara continued, twisting the dagger Aang had thrust into Zuko's gut with his refusal.
"I'm trying to explain that I'm not that person anymore!" Zuko shouted as he walked towards us.
"Either you leave, or we attack." Sokka declared.
"Come on, make my day." I hissed, my hands raising and already summoning fire.
"If you won't accept me as a friend, then maybe you'll accept me as a prisoner." Zuko offered, kneeling onto the ground and offering his hands.
"No. We won't!" Katara yelled, sending out a whip of water at Zuko.
It knocked him away and I felt a surge of satisfaction watching him tumble away. The fire in my hands dissipated as I took a defiant step forward, a look of pure contempt settling on my face as I looked down at Zuko.
"Get out of here and don't come back! And if we ever see you again, well, we better not see you again!" Katara ordered.
Zuko looked away, shamed, and got up, leaving just like we had demanded. I watched him go with a stinging in my chest and rubbed at the tears that were finally beginning to spring from my eyes. I felt my chest tighten as my heart dropped. I had to fight the temptation to chase after him and grew even angrier than before. The anger this time was directed at myself, how could I let my feelings for Zuko affect me like this still?
"Are you okay, Mira?" Katara asked, her arms circling tightly around my shoulders.
"Yeah, that was just...not expected." I sighed as I sunk into Katara's comfort.
"So what is this about you not able to teach Aang firebending?" Sokka demanded to know.
"Uh...well...bad time to bring it up I guess but...they said it would be better if it was someone from the Fire Nation so that there was a bond with what we were doing...once we take out the Fire Lord, guys, the people aren't just going to snap into place and listen. In fact if we just take out the Fire Lord and then try to run the Fire Nation we will cause the Fire Lord to become a martyr, we would look like the bad guys in their narrative. The Fire Nation has been teaching their people to subjugate the world before the rest of the world subjugates them. I...as much as I hate to say this, we might have to let Zuko help us...politically this is the best offer we could get outside Azula joining us...or Iroh, who we have no idea how to reach. Up until now it's always been about survival, but have any of you thought about what comes after?" I asked, avoiding each of their accusing looks.
"Uhh...I guess I always just assumed their people hated him too or would just follow the Avatar because...he's the Avatar." Sokka shrugged.
"The Fire Nation has branded the Avatar an enemy for over a hundred years, that's a little hard to undo in one sitting Sokka." I sighed, feeling a headache coming on.
I wasn't in the mood to explain complex political concepts and acts of war to a bunch of kids. It was unfair of me to feel this way, I knew. It wasn't their fault, it wasn't any of our places to know nor deal with. The only reason I did was because of the thousands of years of repeated history I had available at my fingertips to read. Naia was a glutton for knowledge, something she shared with me avidly. My ability to pursue higher education ensured I had access to information most wouldn't.
"I'd hate to say it too, but I think Mira is right. I've had to deal with politics in my family and perception is everything. The Fire Nation had one hundred years to create their narrative. I don't think any of us can undo all of that in our lifetimes. Also...Zuko seemed sincere, I didn't feel any hesitation or lies when he spoke." Toph said, backing up my words.
"So? Azula could lie easily, maybe it's a family trait." Sokka scoffed bitterly.
"No, Zuko is a shit liar. I want to call him a liar but...I spent a long time with him." I sighed, turning away.
"Look, none of this matters right now. If Mira can't teach Aang, we need to find someone else who can as soon as possible." Katara cut in, being the voice of reason.
"Katara is right let's just...focus on what comes next." I relented, not finding the heart to defend letting Zuko join any longer.
"I kind of have a confession to make. You know when you two got sick and I was captured by Zhao?" Aang said finally.
"And you made us suck on those frogs frogs? How could I forget? I had a wart on the flap that hangs down from the back of my throat for a month." Sokka gagged.
"Whoa, that's what those frogs were for?" I giggled as the memory sprung forth.
"You were there?" Sokka gaped.
"Sokka, I looked at it and told you there was nothing there." Katara chastised.
"I could feel it! It's my throat hole flap!" Sokka cried.
"It's called a uvula." I corrected Sokka.
"It's called a uvu-what?" Sokka whined.
"Anyway, when General Zhao had me chained up it was Zuko and Mira who came in and got me out. He risked his life to save me." Aang admitted.
"No way, Mira must have put him up to it, or he only did it so he could capture you himself." Katara said, crossing her arms.
"Yeah, face it Aang, you're nothing but a big prize to him." Sokka agreed.
"You're probably right but...Mira, what do you think?" Aang asked.
Everyone turned to me and I frowned. This was what I was trying to avoid, but knew was going to come regardless. I could only avoid adding my thoughts for so long. I was, after all, the only expert of Zuko we had.
"I think he's the biggest asshole I know, but in Ba Sing Se, before he betrayed us, he was different. He was...good. Something changed in those catacombs, but for a moment there was good in him, I'm just not sure if it's still there." I admitted, looking away from Aang as I attempted to keep my emotions in check.
"Well, what was all that crazy stuff about setting Appa free? What a liar, obviously you made him do it, why would he have otherwise?" Katara continued.
"I didn't exactly...make him. I said I didn't think he was thinking his plan through, that one was kind of on him...I mean, I wouldn't have let him take Appa if he chose too, but that decision was his own. He got really sick after that and I...I think that's when he started to change." I said with a soft sigh.
"And again, he wasn't lying." Toph added.
"Well hooray! In a lifetime of evil, at least he didn't add animal cruelty to the list." Sokka mocked.
"I'm just saying that considering his messed up family and how he was raised, he could have turned out a lot worse." Toph countered.
"You're right, Toph, let's go find him and give him a medal. The "not as much of a jerk as you could have been award"." Katara laughed as she threw her hands into the air.
I snorted at Katara's comment, being reminded of another quote that was similar. 'Cool motive, still murder.' from Brooklyn 99. It was a bittersweet thought and I clung to it as the nostalgia blanketed my mind.
"All I know is, talking to us, he was sincere. Maybe you're all just letting your hurt feelings keep you from thinking clearly." Toph said.
"Easy for you to say! You weren't there when he had us attacked by pirates!" Katara shouted.
"Or when he burned down Kiyoshi Island!" Sokka added.
"Or when he tried to capture me at the Fire Temple!" Aang added.
"Or when he tricked Mira into falling in love with him and then betrayed her in Ba Sing Se? What about that! Why do you even try to defend him?" Katara seethed.
"All I know is maybe you should ask how Mira feels before using her pain for your argument!" Toph shouted back.
"I'm looking out for her! You weren't there when she was having panic attacks almost every night because of what he did!" Katara yelled back.
"Guys! Just leave me out of this, please." I barked, turning away with a frown.
"Well, Katara, I'm defending him because of one crucial fact, Aang needs a firebending teacher, and Mira is right about the political implications. Now the solution to both problems shows up on a silver platter and you won't even think about it!" Toph raged.
"I'm not having Zuko as my firebending teacher." Aang finalized, attempting to end the argument.
"You're darn right you're not, buddy." Sokka agreed as he clapped Aang on the back.
"Well, I guess that's settled." Katara said, crossing her arms.
"Ergh! I'm beginning to wonder who's really the blind one around here." Toph spat as she stomped off.
~Break~
Toph had been gone for a decent part of the evening and I was beginning to grow worried. No one else seemed to be, too caught up in their own hurt. It was frustrating, but I wasn't acting much better either. I retreated from the group to lick my wounds and mull over the realization that I was nowhere near over Zuko yet.
"Guys, Toph has been gone for awhile..." I trailed off as I looked out at the stars.
"She's fine, just having a temper tantrum." Katara sighed, trying to calm me.
I wasn't so sure, and as the evening turned into night, and night turned into morning, Toph still hadn't returned. Katara was stirring the porridge as everyone was waiting for breakfast. I was gnawing on my bottom lip feeling more anxious than I had ever been in weeks. I was worried about Toph, I was worried about Zuko, and I was worried about finding Aang a proper firebending teacher without letting Iroh down.
"Has anyone seen Toph?" Katara finally asked.
"I haven't seen her since she stormed off yesterday." Sokka admitted.
"Maybe she's just exploring the air temple. There are some pretty fun spots to practice earthbending. " Haru offered.
"I didn't see her come home last night." I spoke from where I was sitting.
"Have you been up all night?" Katara asked, concerned.
"Yes, I was worried about her. What if something happened?" I asked, turning to give Katara a tired look.
"I think we should go look for her." Katara said, finally standing up.
"Bah, let her have fun with her rocks. There's more than one entrance back here and she can make her own. I'm in no rush to have her yelling at us again." Sokka waved off.
"We can go look for her." The Duke offered as he approached us with Haru and Teo.
"Yeah, I wanna ride that tunnel down to the hall of statues again. It'll work a lot better now that I fixed my brakes." The boy in the wheelchair agreed.
They took off in search of her as I rose to my feet. The earth began to shake and we heard a loud boom, turning around I found Toph crawling and rolling down a hill of rocks. I was left reeling at her helpless state. I took in her dirtied and torn clothes, as well as her prone state.
"Oh my god, Toph!" I gasped, rushing over to her.
"Toph! What happened?" Katara shouted, rushing over as well.
"My feet got burned." Toph admitted through clenched teeth.
"Oh no! What happened?" Katara asked as she helped me haul Toph up.
"I just told you, my feet got burned." Toph ground back.
"I think she means how did your feet get burned." I sighed.
"Well, I kind of went to see Zuko last night." Toph admitted.
"You what?!" Aang yelled.
"Zuko!" Katara gasped as her head rounded towards the hole Toph had made.
"Oh dear, was he asleep when you woke him?" I asked, feeling suddenly defensive of Zuko.
"What does that matter?" Sokka glared at me.
I raised my hands in defence and stepped back from Toph allowing Sokka to step in. Sokka turned back towards Toph as he helped support her weight. It was clearly a raw nerve I had hit and it was better if I relented. It wasn't worth the fight, or the subsequent pain.
"I just thought he could be helpful to us. And if I talked to him, maybe we could work something out." Toph said as she looked away from us.
"So he attacked you?" Sokka continued.
"Well, he did and he didn't. It was sort of an accident." Toph attempted to explain.
"But he did firebend at you?" Aang confirmed.
"...yes." Toph relented with a sigh.
"See! You trusted Zuko and you got burned. Literally." Sokka scoffed.
"It's going to take awhile for your feet to get better. I wish I could have worked on them sooner." Katara admitted as she was healing them.
"Yeah, me too." Toph agreed.
"Here, let me help." I said, joining Katara and healing Toph's feet.
"Zuko's clearly too dangerous to be left alone. We're gonna have to go after him." Sokka said.
"And do what?" I said suddenly getting defensive.
"Whatever we have too." Sokka glared at me.
"No." I disagreed.
"Sokka's right. After what he did to Toph, I don't think we have a choice." Aang said, taking Sokka's side.
"He's crafty, but we'll find him a way to capture him." Sokka said, trying to calm me down.
"Just capture him?" I asked, with a glare.
"Yes, just capture. We aren't the evil ones." Sokka spat at me.
"Maybe just invite him back here? He's already offered himself up as a prisoner once." Toph interjected.
"Yeah! Get him to come back and say he'll be a prisoner then we'll jump him and really make him our prisoner! He'll never suspect it!" Sokka laughed.
"Well, I do have to agree. As a prisoner he would be worth something as well, if he's lying about his intentions." I nodded, relenting to Sokka's plans.
"You are a master of surprise, Sokka." Katara said sarcastically.
Sokka and Aang helped carry Toph to the fountain, where she dipped her feet in. Katara and I followed after them, moving to continue helping soothe her feet. I avoided Toph's gaze, despite it being an understanding one. I wasn't ready for more pity regarding Zuko, nor was I looking for an ally to defend him. My actions and words were acting in conflict with one another and I was aware how back and forth I was appearing. But, I wasn't ready to face all of it yet, I just needed more time to pretend that Zuko wasn't here, that I wasn't torn up over him still, and that my feelings had indeed changed.
"Ahh, that's the stuff..." Toph sighed as she stretched her feet into the cool water. "Now I know what the rest of you guys feel. Not being able to see with your feet stinks."
"Yeah, it sure does." I laughed, placing a hand on Toph's shoulder.
Aang went to get some rags to soak and brought them back over. He handed them to Katara as Toph removed her feet so we could work on them some more. Just as Toph placed her feet back into the water, an explosion shook the air temple. I grasped onto the stone bench beneath me and looked around, unable to catch sight of what caused the explosion.
"What the fuck?" I gasped.
"Get Toph." Sokka said right away, lifting her out of the water.
"Stop!" I heard Zuko yell in the distance.
Looking up I saw Zuko on a cliff above us. He walked over to Combustion Man and my eyes widened. What the hell was he doing?
"I don't want you hunting the Avatar anymore," Zuko demanded as he ran over to the man and stood in front of him "The mission is off! I'm ordering you to stop."
Combustion Man had other ideas though, and threw Zuko away. He sent out another explosion at us and debris rained down upon us. We hid against the stone fountain, keeping Toph covered. My throat clenched tightly as I tried to make sense of the scene before us.
"If you keep attacking, I won't pay you!" I heard Zuko shout.
Peering around the fountain I saw him letting loose a punch of fire, attacking the man only to be caught easily. I always forget how lithe Zuko was, compared to other fighters he was a tiny ragdoll at times. My stomach was making flip flop as I found that fear had seized my heart. I was worried about Zuko.
"Alright, I'll pay you double to stop!" Zuko attempted to negotiate. The man ignored him, setting up another blast as Zuko kicked him in the face, knocking him off balance.
"Ok, we are going to have to go on the offensive here." I said through clenched teeth.
Combustion man sent out a blast as Zuko summoned a wall of fire, protecting himself. The explosion sent him off the edge and I couldn't stop the scream that escaped. Suddenly it felt like nothing else mattered. I felt so foolishly stupid, as if for once it was my pride keeping me from doing what was right. I watched as rocks cascaded down into the abyss below.
"Zuko!" I shouted, feeling rage well up in me.
I was not worried about him. That was absolutely not the reason I was currently filled with heart gripping fear and rage. Aang grabbed my arm and shook me, causing me to stop the build up of energy that would undoubtedly turn into the Avatar State. Looking once more I found Zuko holding onto a large vine, climbing back up it. I was not relieved, definitely not relieved.
"Let's go." Aang said, making up his mind.
I nodded and we jumped over the fountain, catching Combustion Man's attention. He sent out another explosion as Aang lifted us up into the air. We summoned up the air around us and sent out a large tornado at Combustion Man. He jumped over it, sending out another explosion, which I blocked with a wall of my own fire as we flipped out of the way. Combustion Man landed just barely hitting a ledge as we ran back to Toph to check on everyone. Another explosion hit and we braced ourselves. Katara sent out a torrent of water from the fountain, sending out an array of ice knives at the man. He braced himself and we took that moment to hide, attempting to gain the element of surprise. We rushed towards a wall to the right of us, taking cover. Another explosion rocked against us as a pillar was destroyed.
"He's going to blast this whole place right off the cliffside!" Toph yelled.
Another explosion rocked us as we braced against the wall. I felt debris coating my skin and itch against my scalp. I grit my teeth as I attempted to peek out from behind the wall. I saw Combustion Man for a mere moment before another explosion was sent our way.
"I can't step out to waterbend at him without getting blown up! And I can't get a good enough angle on him from down here!" Katara admitted, her expression frantic.
Sokka looked down in thought as I wracked my brain for an answer. There had to be something we could do, at least until Zuko could finish climbing back up. If Combustion man caught sight of him he would be done for. I was struck by my worried thoughts and shook them off, looking at Sokka as he let out a small aha noise.
"I know how to get an angle on him." Sokka said as he withdrew his boomerang.
He drew himself around the wall as another explosion hit. He peered around once more as two more blasts came, measuring the angle of the hits.
"Alright, buddy. Don't fail me now." Sokka said as he threw his boomerang.
It flew out of distance and we heard an impact along with a grunt. The explosions stopped as Sokka gave us a huge grin.
"Yeah! Boomerang!" He cheered, running from cover to catch it.
Combustion Man was standing back up though, leaving our victory short lived.
"Aww...boomerang!" Sokka complained.
Rushing back into cover, we heard multiple explosions before a large bang echoed around us. Combustion Man had just self-destructed. Whatever Sokka had done, it was enough to stop Combustion Man from, well, combusting.
"Holy shit." I gaped as we all ran to the edge.
A piece of the temple fell into the abyss below, prices of Combustion Man's armor along with it. Staring at one another we couldn't believe it; we had just killed him. Zuko had just made it back up the vine, before making his way over to us. As he walked over it felt like we were meeting again for the first time, in better circumstances. I wondered briefly if things would have been different if we had met under different circumstances.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but...thanks, Zuko." Aang said, speaking first.
"Hey, what about me? I did the boomerang thing." Sokka said, striking a pose.
"You wouldn't have been able to do the boomerang thing if Zuko hadn't kicked the guy in the first place. We'd all be long dead." I snorted, but provided Sokka high-five anyways.
"Listen, I know I didn't explain myself very well yesterday. I've been through a lot in the past few years and it's been hard. But I'm realizing that I had to go through all those things to learn the truth. I thought I had lost my honour, and that somehow my father could return it to me. But I know now that no one can give you your honour. It's something you earn for yourself by choosing to do what's right. All I want now is to play my part in ending this war. And I know my destiny is to help you restore balance to the world. I'm sorry for what I did to you. It was an accident. Fire can be dangerous and wild, so as a firebender I need to be more careful and control my bending so I don't hurt people unintentionally." Zuko said as he bowed to Toph.
"I think you are supposed to be my firebending teacher. When I first tried to learn firebending, I burned Katara. And after that, I never wanted to firebend again. But now I know you understand how easy it is to hurt the people you love," Aang said as he bowed to Zuko. "I'd like you to teach me."
Zuko looked on in surprise, taking in Aang's request. They both smiled at one another as he bowed in response. It was strange seeing Zuko so humble, but I couldn't stop the pride from spilling forth at the change in him.
"Thank you. I'm so happy that you've accepted me into your group." Zuko said.
"Not so fast. I still have to ask my friends if it's ok with them. Toph, you're the one that Zuko burned, what do you think?" Aang asked,
"Go ahead and let him join. It'll give me plenty of time to get back at him for burning my feet." Toph smiled as she hit her fist into her hand.
"Sokka?" Aang asked.
"Hey, all I want is to defeat the Fire Lord. If you think this is the way to do it, then, I'm all for it." Sokka relented.
"Katara?" Aang asked next.
"I'll go along with whatever you think is right." Katara sighed before glaring at Zuko.
"Mira?" Aang asked, giving me a long hard look.
With a sigh I pushed myself from the wall and gave Zuko my full attention.
"I think...I've told you all those things about your honour before, Zuko, but...I'm glad you finally see it. But this isn't about me, you can thank your uncle once more, and as long as this is what Aang wants, it's what I want. He's my airbending teacher after all." I shrugged, turning away.
Aang looked at Zuko with a bright smile now.
"I won't let you down. I promise." Zuko declared, stepping towards us.
We all walked away, taking Toph into the temple to get some much needed rest. Zuko stayed behind to get his belongings as I let out a sigh.I just hoped what we were doing was right. The last time I had trusted Zuko to be good I got burned.
~Break~
"Okay, this is really really weird." Sokka admitted when he returned from showing Zuko to his room.
"You're telling me." I sighed, blowing a stand of hair out of my face.
We walked away, feeling uneasy as Aang continued to smile. He was so easy going with everything, I wish I was able to be too. It felt surreal and I could feel myself beginning to disassociate as I bid Sokka goodnight at my door.
~Break~
That night was hard. I could feel Zuko's presence through the walls. Until now he had kept his distance and that was in part because he had to go gather his own belongings from his old camp. Now, nothing was stopping us from seeing one another, talking to one another. Yet desperately that is all I wanted to do. I wanted to scream at him my anger, my hurt, and my regret, I wanted to make him feel the burn in my chest that he made me feel. It was all petty daydreams that would never go beyond just that. I wished so desperately then that I had my phone. I hated not having access to my music.
"Penny for your thoughts?" Spirit Aang asked.
"How do you know what a penny is?" I asked with a whiff of laughter on my breath.
"You tried to explain it to me once when you had mentioned the saying." Aang shrugged.
"I should be mad at you." I said, the hint of grin on my lips.
"You can't say a part of you isn't pleased by this." Aang smiled knowingly down at me.
"Yeah...it's just a little late is all." I sighed, admitting my conflicted feelings out loud finally.
"Would you sing me a song tonight?" Aang asked.
"Really? That can't be the only reason you're here." I laughed.
"No, but a song couldn't hurt, could it?" He asked.
"No, I suppose not." I smiled.
I took a moment to think about what songs I still did know the words too, and one kept coming back into my mind. I had always been a big fan of Bastille and Marshmallo, it was hard not to. The song had been one of the last songs I had heard before I had been spirited away into the past.
"Lately, I've been, I've been thinking I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier. When the morning comes, when we see what we've become, in the cold light of day we're a flame in the wind not the fire that we've begun. Every argument, every word we can't take back 'cause with all that has happened I think that we both know the way that the story ends. Then only for a minute, I want to change my mind, cause this just don't feel right to me. I want to raise your spirits, I want to see you smile but know that means I'll have to leave."
The sounds of the beat and piano echoed in my head as my thoughts twisted. The last remains of my home, and my time, were but echoed memories within my head now.
"Know that means I'll have to leave...lately, I've been, I've been thinking, I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier." I sang, a sob in my throat.
I wracked my memories for the next words, I almost felt the song lost on my lips as I traced the music in my mind. It was hard not to draw upon the image of Zuko's face, or the feel of his touch. I wasn't sure who I was even singing too anymore, feeling more like a cliché than anything else.
"When the evening falls and I'm left there with my thoughts and the image of you being with someone else. Well, that's eating me up inside. But we ran our course, we pretend that we're okay. Now if we jump together at least we can swim far away from the wreck we've made. Then only for a minute, I want to change my mind 'cause this just don't feel right to me. I want to raise your spirits, I want to see you smile but know that means I'll have to leave." I sang.
I started to sway, to keep the beat. My thoughts were bubbling beneath the surface of my skin. It itched to crawl out and into my feet. Never before had I wanted to walk into the night and find comfort in someone's arms, the arms of the last person to poison me so deeply
"Know that means I'll have to leave...lately, I've been, I've been thinking I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier. So I'll go, I'll go, I will go, go, go. So I'll go, I'll go, I will go, go, go. Lately, I've been, I've been thinking I want you to be happier, I want you to be happier. Even though I might not like this, I think that you'll be happier, I want you to be happier." I sang on.
Taking a deep breath I saw the notes floating behind my eyes as I closed them, Envisioned the trills and the fancy vocal work I was sure to butcher.
"OOOOOOOOOOH YEAH YEAH YEAH OOOooOOOOh! I said lately, I've been thinking, I've been thinking, I want you to be happier, oh, happier." I finished as I sucked in a greedy breath.
"That was beautiful. I haven't heard it before." Spirit Aang smiled as he clapped for me.
"Thanks, the music video was about a dog." I said awkwardly.
It was easier to say than to explain the feelings that battled for freedom.
~Chapter 11 End~