11: Undo

Roman was going to die. He was absolutely sure of it. The question of when that would happen was the finer point.

Ruby was doing her best to speed up the process much too significantly for his liking. His stomach churned as they raced towards the army of Grimm challenging them. He had no idea how she was going to fight her way through that, and the way he was being jostled like a sack of potatoes over her back wasn't affording him the breath to ask.

His surroundings soon became a blur; he couldn't make out anything but the small of Ruby's back and the fan of her hair. Though tired, Roman hated being held hostage to ignorance much more than overexertion.

One more time. Come on, keep it together!

Head pounding, he activated his Semblance and the fuzzy blurs surrounding them came into sharp focus. Then he almost wished he hadn't as he saw how narrow the path was that Ruby had chosen through the Grimm. She was dodging rather than fighting them, every fiber of her being intent on weaving through their enemies as efficiently as possible.

The fang of a Taijitu brushed by his cheek. The claws of an Ursa whispered past his sleeve. A Geist reached out with one clawed hand; Ruby didn't bother dodging that one, simply running right through it, obliterating it with the impact of their bodies.

Her grip on his legs was firm and her focus was unwavering. Maybe he was wrong; maybe battles could be a dance, if Ruby was the one doing the leading. He wondered if she realized how good she was at it. And also how anyone could so skillfully master the art of combat without ever wanting to kill anybody. She'd even almost succeeded with that.

The spike of pain that erupted in his chest was probably from her boney shoulder digging into it.

Ruby plowed them through a field of Creeps, using their heads as stepping-stones. She managed to hang onto him as she flipped her way through a Nevermore's ranged attack, utilizing his weight to counterbalance her momentum in much the same way she did with her scythe. Something like hope began to grow inside of him; maybe, just maybe, escaping from Exsul wasn't simply her wishful thinking.

Then Ruby stumbled, one slight misstep. She regained her balance almost instantly, but he'd felt it - a break in her otherwise sure movements. She managed to dodge through the swipe of a Beowulf and avoid a close-fisted swing from a Beringel - but he saw the ribbon of red blossom against her leg as a Lepus scored it with its antlers. They passed by a Griffon so closely that Roman felt the back of his jacket tear open.

And then, suddenly, they were past the worst of the Grimm ambush. At the speed they were traveling, he guessed they'd reach the Bullhead in a few minutes. Ruby tripped again, and instead of observing the Grimm, Roman looked at her instead.

He felt his throat go dry at the prospect of what those few minutes would mean when he saw her. Her hair sailed over his shoulders, as long as the Ice Queen's now and gradually turning just as pale. She still wasn't slowing down - Ruby was taking no chances, the look on her face one of pure determination.

"Stop," he tried to say, but the wind snatched the words away before they could reach her. He balled his hand into a fist and struck her in the back; she stumbled, but kept on running. "Damn it, Ruby! Enough already!" He hit her harder, but she was ignoring him now. Frustrated, he gripped the barrel of Ruby Tuesday and drove the butt of the rifle squarely into her back with his entire strength.

Yelping in pain, she fell; she was traveling much too quickly to stop, though. They crashed into the ground, carving out a shallow canyon that ripped apart the forest as they slid by. Even without running, their momentum carried them all the way into the middle of the clearing where he'd landed the Bullhead.

Roman rolled to a stop, groaning in pain. He didn't manage to hold onto his aura during the crash - the last few feet of their slide had hurt. Ruby's hand was still hanging on to his leg with a death grip. He was bruised and bleeding and he could swear his jacket was smoking but ignored it, prying her hand off of his leg and dragging himself over her prone body.

He cursed under his breath when he saw her. She'd suffered a similar fate - for all of the freakish control she was able to exert over her aura expenditure, even she had to run out of steam at some point. Though breathing, she was unconscious. Her skin was also covered with bruises and lacerations from their rough landing. Still, that wasn't what worried him the most.

Long white hair sprouted from the crown of her head and gradually tapered in a gradient down to her natural black. The tips of her hair were still dyed in that garish red, reminding him of her real age. She'd knocked herself out cold; when he eased her onto her back, he swore at what he saw.

What had once been the hints of a line here and there had evolved into a roadmap of fine wrinkles. Her face was weathered with the stress of a lifetime she hadn't actually yet lived, the skin stretched tight across her bones. He briefly wondered if their lack of meals had anything to do with the way she developed during her rapid aging, because she was even thinner than before - and not in a good way.

"Fool. You look old enough to be my mother," he growled, reaching down to grab her. He fought the wave of dizziness that threatened to overcome him, knowing they'd have to move fast. Ruby might have been able to outrun Salem's summoned forces, but the local Grimm were still around somewhere. It wouldn't take long for a stray Lepus or Boarbatusk to spot them, and then they'd be royally fucked.

His hands closed around her shoulders, and he froze.

Wait a minute.

He looked down at Ruby, his thoughts churning. "Well grandma," he said as sat her up in his arms. He slapped her on the cheeks a few times to be sure she was out before continuing. "Looks like you're not waking up anytime soon."

It was an uncharitable moniker, he knew; at best she looked to be around Ozpin's age, maybe a little older. It was hard to tell; either she had some lucky genes in her family, or her forced aging had skipped over the harsher tolls of the process. Her skin was still relatively even-toned and unblemished, discounting of course all those lines etched into her face. He reached out and stroked a slow finger along her cheek.

"Should I leave you here?" he asked softly. "Neo would have liked that." His hand continued to travel down her neck, where he spread his fingers, then closed them around her throat. It'd be so easy to just squeeze. Less cruel than leaving behind a body for the Grimm to tear apart.

He could reserve that achievement for himself.

"I'm tired of running, Ruby," he admitted, keeping his hand on her throat. "But you destroyed the last place in this damn world that I could call home." His fingers twitched, and he had to stop speaking after that because his teeth clenched together so tightly his jaw hurt.

"I hate you," he managed to say after a few moments. "I… really hate you, Ruby Rose."

He wouldn't have been surprised if she woke up right then. He even imagined what she'd do. Probably make one of those faces again - the ones that clearly screamed Torchwick's losing his damn mind - and then lob him a witty retort with a good helping of after-school special platitudes.

His tremors intensified, his hand shaking on her fragile, exposed throat.

Except she wouldn't do any of that. Because to her, he'd become Roman, not Torchwick. She was awkwardly, painfully transparent, especially about her feelings. She'd probably apologize, give him a hug, and say something about him looking like he needed a friend right now.

"I don't think I want to be your friend," he parroted back at her, the exact words she'd used against him once. But it wasn't the same. It wasn't because he didn't trust her. It was because he did.

"You won't stop, you bulldog," he ground out, releasing her throat. "No matter what I do to you, you keep trying to save me. I don't want to be saved." He picked her up and staggered towards the Bullhead. She was still so heavy, a real burden to carry. "I don't want to see the world the way you do, kid," he panted.

Isn't it lonely? he could hear her asking as her younger self skipped by his side, as fresh-faced as the first time he'd ever met her. Not having anything or anyone to trust or believe in?

"I trusted my team, and look where it got me: last man standing," he spat as he dumped her body into the co-pilot's chair. "First the Grimm, now you," he added as he strapped her in. "Can't you fuckers stay the hell out of my head?"

He heard her giggle and straightened. She was a little older now, that dyed black hair slightly longer than before. They trusted you too. Her smile was understanding; that was the worst part. You know it, don't you? In your heart. Your prison, your key.

"I'm not trapped," he swore as he waved her out of his way and sat down, starting up the Bullhead's engines. He sealed the hatch and looked through the windshield; the glowing eyes of a colony of Lepus were winking to life at the edge of the forest. "I'm the freest man in Remnant. No responsibilities, not anymore. You guaranteed that when you killed her."

Her silver eyes were gentle, not the monstrous anti-Grimm weapons he knew they could be. They still pierced straight through his soul when he looked up. It doesn't matter what you call it. Love and duty? They can be the same things to a team leader. You don't need to be able to sacrifice your team to be a good one. You need to be willing to sacrifice yourself.

Ruby was still unconscious; he glanced over at her body slumped over in the chair to be sure. He felt another pang in his chest as he studied the long, mismatched hair spilling over her shoulders. How many times now had she done that for him?

"Team REND was a stupid name," he reminded himself, guiding the Bullhead off the ground.

But you loved them, she answered. That's why you were their leader. They were your home.

He watched the horde of Lepus rushing towards the airship. The creatures could probably still bring them down at this point if he didn't manage to get clear of the field; the Bullhead had barely lifted away from the ground and was gaining altitude too slowly.

You're the one who destroyed your own home first, Ruby reminded him, looking older now - the face he'd grown most accustomed to seeing her wear around him. You turned your back on Atlas and Team REND and ran away.

"I know that," he said, sweating. "Can you save the speech? I'm trying to concentrate here."

You're trying to decide, she corrected him. Go up in flames now with them, or find a new home in the future with me.

"You're not real!" Roman yelled as his hands gripped the yoke. The rolling black wave of eyes, horns and teeth churned towards the airship. "You're not the real Ruby!"

Of course not, Roman. I'm you.

He blanked, quiet surprise dousing the deafening confusion of his thoughts. "I'm not that good," he whispered into the sudden silence.

He felt her ghostly arms circle around his neck. It doesn't matter how many mistakes you've made, or how low you've gone. She smiled against his cheek. If you want to find a new home, the first place you have to start is within. The apparition slid around to face him with that smile - Ruby's smile. That trusting, innocent thing he was certain he'd blown to smithereens alongside Dandelion, Ecru, and half of Atlas Academy's Dust depot.

"The things I've done to survive..."

Don't use that as an excuse to run away anymore. The apparition kneeled and leaned its head against Ruby's knee. This girl keeps telling you what she sees in you. Haven't you understood yet? It reached up and touched a gentle hand to Ruby's cheek.

"Hope," he croaked out helplessly. "She thinks even someone like me can still be good."

Ruby's image turned its head and looked at him again, and he felt the edges of the anger and desperation that had held him together for so long start to crumble.

That's because it's you. If you can change, so can the rest of this damaged world. She faded away, leaving him alone with the real Ruby, but the whisper in his mind lingered. You're not going mad, Roman. You're finally starting to listen.

Something inside of him that had been raging calmed, much as it had when the Grimm voices in his head had shut down under the pine tree. And in that vacuum, the grief that he hadn't been allowing himself to consider was suddenly present, raw and naked. Neo. My Neo… she's gone, really gone this time. He had no defenses left to block it anymore, and the pain threatened to overwhelm him.

Roman wasn't sure what Neo would have thought of his weakness just then; the woman he'd met had already been consumed by Salem. He wondered if she'd weathered the same slow slide into madness as he. If meeting Ruby earlier could've helped her, too. But still, he was sure he knew the human Neo better than anyone else in this world. She'd shared his goals and dreams, to the point of following him out of Atlas. She'd always wanted what was best for him. Maybe she'd even wanted that as a Grimm, in her own twisted way.

The intense feeling of her loss was another blow to his damaged soul. But alongside that crushing weight was a fragile bandage wrapping around the wound, binding the grief and making the hole in his chest bearable: this newfound will to survive. Neo - my Neo - she would've wanted me to see what came next.

His attention came back to his surroundings, and he made a decision.

"Not today, you bastards."

The Bullhead rotated in a wide circle over the clearing. Roman aimed the jets towards the oncoming Grimm, blasting them with clean, blue, dust-powered fire. After spinning the ship a few more times to make sure he hadn't missed any, he raised the Bullhead above the tree line. Black clouds of smoke from the charred remains of his enemies followed the ship upwards, dissipating as their bodies crumbled away.

In the distance, he watched the airborne Grimm circling over the mountainside change course.

"Well," he mused. "No one said doing things right this time would be easy."

Ruby lay silent and unresponsive in the co-pilot's chair. His reflection in the windshield, however, was grinning.

.x.x.x.

A wide expanse of ocean spread before him, with little else in sight. Roman rolled his shoulders, allowing some of the tension to ebb out of his body. Leaving Exsul had been a harrowing experience, but he knew he was a better pilot than most. Besides, even without his ability to outfly a few brainless Grimm, no creature could keep up with an airship across this much water. Which is not to say they hadn't tried; he'd personally found great satisfaction in watching a few of the more ambitious ones faltering before finally dropping into the water from exhaustion. Now, as they cruised over the endless sea, he had enough time to sit back and think.

Ruby was still out cold, and he was starting to worry. "Shouldn't you have woken up by now?" Of course she didn't answer. He turned back to the dash, eyeing their coordinates. Then he leaned back and rubbed his aching eyes. "Where the hell are we going, anyway?"

Atlas was right out, they wanted his head there. And Vacuo was a desert shithole, no thanks. "Should've put more thought into my retirement," he grumbled.

Well… there was always Mistral - it was the perfect place for someone like him to fade away and hide from Ironwood and his goons. He wouldn't even be surprised if Ruby was already attending the academy there, considering how she'd kept up her training after Beacon was destroyed.

He looked at her again and then shook his head. Not like she'd be going back to any academy now though, not with the way she looked. It'd be a wonder if her friends could even recognize her at this point, if not for her ridiculous Gothic Lolita outfit.

Why won't she wake up? Aura depletion was a thing, obviously, but… her rapid aging and absorbing whatever freaky secret power Cinder had been hiding in her body were variables he didn't understand how to factor into her comatose state. Something itched between his shoulder blades.

"I know where you need to go," he said to her. "You need to be back with people who can actually help you… and give a shit about doing it." He looked over the ocean, pensive. "Damn it, Red. You're not even giving me a chance to enjoy my new lease on life here."

Sighing, he adjusted their coordinates.

"You think you've gotta be willing to sacrifice yourself for the team, huh? It'll never come to that if your team decides to off themselves first." He smirked. "Well well well, Ruby. Guess it turns out you're a better leader than I gave you credit for."

.x.x.x.

They were coming hot. Roman cursed as he swung the Bullhead around, narrowly avoiding an angry Nevermore.

"Shit! Was a fucking gun really too much to ask for on this piece of junk?" He swerved out of the way of another Grimm attack. Ruby couldn't answer him, seeing as how she was still unconscious. Her limbs flapped around like a limp rag doll's every time he pushed their airship to its limits; at least her head was padded from the worst of the shock by the makeshift cushion he'd fashioned out of her bag.

The radio crackled. "This is Beacon approach! I repeat, identify yourself! We have you padlocked-"

He didn't have time to answer, speeding the Bullhead into a roll to avoid the coordinated attack of several Griffons. He didn't remember them being able to do that before. "Fucking Salem!"

"Whoa, nice jink!" the air traffic controller shouted.

"Amateur," Roman groaned under his breath.

There was a burst of static covering what sounded like a short argument. Then Goodwitch's voice cracked through the cockpit like a whip.

"Torchwick! I know it's you up there!"

Now that one was worth answering. "Glynda! Did you miss me, baby?"

He could have sworn the next sounds he heard were of her breaking things rather than static but it was hard to tell, what with the game of Grimm keep-away he was playing.

"Much as I'd like to savor this happy reunion-" He jerked against his seat as he sent the airship into a steep dive. "...I could use a little help here! Get your Huntsmen to do their damn jobs!"

"Give me one reason why we shouldn't let the Grimm have you."

"What? Giving you your airship back isn't good enough? Fine, how about this one: I've got Ruby on board."

Now there were definitely some arguments going on in the background. Goodwitch's voice, when it reappeared, was cold. "And what makes you think she's welcome here after that little stunt the two of you pulled?"

He grit his teeth. We don't have time for this. "She's hurt, Goodwitch. Pretty bad. But since I know you're the soul of compassion," he said sarcastically, "I'll do you one better. If she dies, that dragon on your tower wakes up."

For a moment there was nothing but the crackle of static filling the cockpit. "C'mon, you stupid bitch," he muttered. "Hurry it up." Sweat beaded on his brow as he dodged more Grimm, but what shook him the most was Ruby's lack of chastisement for his language.

"You're no fun when you're half dead," he admitted aloud. "Get up already, Ruby."

"Torchwick. We're sending our Huntsmen out." Goodwitch's voice was all business this time. "Just set down wherever you can. We'll cover you."

She meant that literally, he realized, as a string of blue barriers began to pop up around the Bullhead, conveniently lighting the way to the landing pad nearest to what looked like their hospital.

"Your boyfriend's here to save the day," Roman said conversationally as he took advantage of the runway being cleared for them. "You better wake up and explain things so he won't kill me when he sees you."

He brought them down a more quickly than he should have - sloppy work, really - but couldn't bring himself to care about the damage he'd done to the ship as he tore off his seatbelt. He flipped open the hatch, cursing how slow the mechanism was while freeing Ruby from her seat. She didn't appear to have broken any bones from their rough landing, so he lifted her gingerly out of the chair and made for the exit.

The blond boy wonder beat him to the punch, followed by his teammates: a well-muscled redhead and the punk from before who'd helped bust him out of jail.

"Where's Ruby?" Boy Wonder cried, eyes wide, and Roman barely resisted the urge to lift one leg and boot him in the crotch.

"She's right here, you imbecile," he growled, turning Ruby so that her long hair fell away from her face.

"Ohmygod! Ruuubbbiiiee!" wailed the ginger, running up to Roman and elbowing him out of the way with a surprising amount of force. She grabbed Ruby right out of his arms as though the unconscious girl weighed nothing.

He staggered from the sudden loss of balance and when he straightened, came face-to-face with the business end of Punk's gun. "What did you do to her?" the kid asked softly, and Roman tensed up. It was always the quiet ones who were deadly.

"Ren, stop it," Boy Wonder cut in. "This isn't Torchwick's doing."

"What do you mean, it's not his fault?" Ginger Harpy shrieked, her face turning bright red. "If I wasn't holding Ruby right now, I'd rip his sorry ass a new hole! Look at her!"

"I did look at Ruby," Boy Wonder said, his voice heavy, and with a start Roman realized he knew.

The worry that had been building over the course of the last few hours exploded into a ball of hot fury. "You didn't stop her?" he snarled, smacking Punk's handgun out of his way and stalking over to the blond. He grabbed the kid - Jaune, she'd called him - by the collar and pulled him in close, eyes flashing. "You knew she could do this, but you ignored it? What kind of a boyfriend are you?"

"Why do you care?" Jaune answered hotly, bringing his hands up and struggling against Roman's tight grip. As they grappled with one another, Roman's fingers dug into something hard and metallic against the boy's neck which came loose with a click - a circlet, it looked like.

That same circlet he'd seen lying by the charred black patch on Beacon's tower.

"Give that back!" Jaune's reaction was swift as he knocked Roman off and tore the circlet out of his grip, his blue eyes blazing with fury.

It didn't matter, because Roman's hands had lost their strength. Neo, he thought, recognizing that look. "... Sorry kid. I didn't know," he managed to choke out between his unexpected surprise and the tight feeling in his chest.

Jaune's fist, raised to deliver what would have been a bruising punch, halted in mid-air. "What?"

Roman stumbled away from him, feeling the exhaustion of their mad escape from Exsul straight into the hell that was now Vale catching up with him. This was probably one of the shittiest ideas I've ever had. His feet took him automatically towards Ruby, who was still being held by the redhead.

Ginger Harpy's look would have killed him on the spot if it was possible. "Don't come near us, you bastard!" she warned, cradling Ruby to her chest. "Ren! Get him!"

Roman spun away from her, trying to get a fix on Punk - Ren, he corrected himself, Ruby would have wanted him to use their names - and came face-to-face with the tip of a wand. His mind cleared as he held his hands up.

"Mr. Torchwick." Goodwitch's voice was smug. "So good of you to join us again." She seemed impervious to the Grimm battle raging overhead, her entire focus on him alone.

"Don't worry, I'm not gonna try to run away this time," he reassured her.

"Really? I'd hold you to your word, if you were a man of them," another voice cut in, and Roman felt his stomach drop.

"Fuck me," he mumbled, annoyed at the tiny smile that twitched at the corner of Goodwitch's lip at his response.

Ironwood stepped into view behind Goodwitch, his frown permanently embedded into his massive chin. "Torchwick," he said slowly, eying him up and down. "How… convenient."

"Nice to see you again too," Roman mumbled, keeping his arms up.

"Jaune!" The harpy's voice behind him was wavering, sounding panicky. "She's not waking up!"

"Calm down, Nora," Ren said.

Roman tried to turn around, but Goodwitch's wand caught him on the chin, freezing him in place. "Ah ah ah. You've some questions to answer, Mr. Torchwick. But first, hand over your weapon."

"How can I be calm when she looks like this?" Nora continued, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.

Roman shut his eyes. Then, slinging Ruby Tuesday off of his shoulder, he held it out to Ironwood. "Just hurry up and take care of Little Red already. She needs help."

"Your concern is touching. Don't think for a minute it's going to do anything to mitigate your sentence." Ironwood didn't even deliver that line with as much as a smirk.

Goodwitch, on the other hand, looked surprised. Her wand drifted away from his throat. "Are you serious?" she asked, sounding flabbergasted. "That's why you came back?"

"What's why?" Ironwood asked, sounding annoyed.

Goodwitch always was quicker on the uptake, Roman noted; it was the first time he was ever grateful for it. "It's her Semblance. I think that kid Jaune can tell you more," he told her, ignoring Ironwood's fuming from the sidelines. "Yeah, I know, I'm trash. But she isn't. That's gotta still be worth something to you, Goodwitch."

Goodwitch's eye twitched, but she sheathed her wand.

"Glynda!" Ironwood shouted, pulling his gun.

"Oh, put a sock in it, James," Goodwitch spat, and Roman gave her a mental like. She tilted her chin towards him thoughtfully. "You'll come without a fight this time?"

"I'll even stay," he added, grinning. It faded somewhat as he watched Nora pass by, Ruby limp in her arms. His head tracked her progress as she jogged towards the entrance to the hospital, followed by the rest of Ruby's team. "Just… tell me what happens to her before you let General Ironhead have his way."

Jaune stopped, then turned back to look at him. He stared for a moment, his face screwed into a look of deep thought that was nearly as transparent as Ruby's. "I'll make sure you know," he said to Roman.

"Have you all lost your minds?" Ironwood exclaimed, slapping a pair of handcuffs onto Roman's wrists and dragging him in a different direction. "You're coming with me, you walking piece of garbage, and this time you're not getting away!"

Roman resisted Ironwood's tug until the last strands of Ruby's trailing hair disappeared from his sight. Then he rolled his eyes and allowed one of Ironwood's shoves to trip him forward. "Alright, fine, I'm moving!" Still, he couldn't help his head from turning back to look at the hospital one last time.

Ruby. You better wake up.

Notes

Aviator Slang:

To have something "padlocked" is to have a bogey (hostile aircraft) in your sights.

A "jink" is a quick maneuver to avoid a threat.