AUTHOR'S NOTE: Back for another regularly scheduled update :)

DISCLAIMER

ALL MIGHT: Young PixelKind, I am about to give you the sacred responsibility passed down to me by my Master... this power that I will grant you, is the power that will let you be the Number One Hero.

PIXELKIND: (gasps)you don't mean...?

ALL MIGHT: That's right, my boy! You are to be the ninth wielder of the Rights to My Hero Academia!

PIXELKIND: this is the greatest day of my life.

ALL FOR ONE: don't mind me I'm just here to- (obliterates ALL MIGHT with a giant laser beam)

PIXELKIND: (collapses to the ground) No... sensei... I had so much to learn from you

ALL FOR ONE: (exits to stage left)

PIXELKIND: (stands up) No. My dream cannot die like this. Even without those rights, I still have what it takes!

(Stage darkens, spotlight falls on PIXELKIND)

PIXELKIND: This is the story of how I became the Number One Hero, without the rights to My Hero Academia. Please support the official release.

~ TAKE IT FROM THE TOP ~
The Story Of How I Wrecked My Favorite Hero's Origin Story After He Fed Me His Hair

[CHAPTER TWO]: Once More, Unto The Beach

In Which Nezu Finds Izuku's Internet History

"So," All Might began as I finished Rewinding your obliterated pelvic region, "What have we learned today?"

"That clenching my buttcheeks isnt necessary to activate One for All," you answered, tying my Deku hoodie around your waist so the back of the jacket covered your now-bare but fully healed butt.

"To bring spare clothes when testing out new Quirks?" I offered, surveying the tiny scraps of what used to be your pants scattered across the beach.

You walked over to your bag and pulled out one of your notebooks. "That my hypothesis was correct," you said thoughtfully.

All Might and I blinked. "Your hypothesis?" I asked.

You nodded and flipped the notebook open. "A while ago, you mentioned that in your original timeline, I- or at least your version of me- kept breaking their bones, right? And that got me thinking; because normally the human body has limiters… not so much built into it as they are learned; your body subconsciously figures out how much strength it can use without hurting itself as you grow- incidentally, this is why sometimes people who have Quirks that enhance their durability think it can enhance their strength- and when you exceed your body's safe limits- usually only possible in times of extreme desperation or rage or some other atypical mental state- we call that hysterical strength."

All Might nodded. "I'm familiar with the concept."

You spun a pen across your fingers. "Now, applying this concept to our current situation… I don't even think this is because One for All is insanely powerful- not that it isn't, but this situation would arise even if it wasn't. It's because of its nature as being transferable; I didn't grow up with it, my body hasn't learned how it works or how much of it I can use safely, so it can't regulate it properly."

"Well, I could use it perfectly fine right when I got it, so I don't know if that's it." said All Might.

You didn't even look at him. "That's because your natural shapeshifting Quirk adapted your body to handle the strain."

All Might stared at you. "Young Midoriya, I was Quirkless when I got it."

You stared right back at him. "What."

He nodded. "Yep! One for All is the only Quirk I've had." He frowned. "...why did you think I had a shapeshifting Quirk?"

You frowned at him. "Because a typical human body physically can't do what you do to hide your injury? Your mass literally changes when you switch back and forth; it's something far beyond merely sucking in your gut."

All Might looked down at his hands, then back up at you. "That's news to me."

You looked down at your notebook, then tore a handful of pages out. "Give me a week to reconsider how this Quirk works, please."

"Oh! He might be subconsciously tapping into one of the other Quirks in there," I offered. "Probably Good Boy."

Your eyes suddenly gained a very faraway look in them. "...other Quirks?"

All Might frowned. "Good Boy?"

"Yeah!" I grinned, savoring the feeling of getting to explain how cool Deku is to the uninitiated. "Deku has seven base Quirks that he uses in conjunction to pull off his more complex super moves; Full Cowl, Float, Eyes On You, Black Whip, Good Boy, Sparkgate, and Dangersense."

You and All Might both stared at me like I was an alien.

"What? I'm a fan, it'd be weird to not know this."

"...why is it called Good Boy?" finally asked All Might.

I shrugged. "Nobody ever really got that one, to be entirely honest. It's some kind of anatomy manipulation Quirk as far as anyone could tell."

"Well, Float is the Quirk of my predecessor, Nana Shimura," said All Might. "So these could all be the Quirks of all the previous wielders." He grinned and turned to you. "How about that, Young Midoriya? Seven Quirks, instead of just one!"

You simply stared blankly at me, even as your hand recorded notes at a breakneck speed.

"Eri," you said in a hollow voice.

"Izuku," I said back, taken aback at your tone.

"You have been with us for six months. And you did not bring this up?" you said woodenly.

"I mean, come on, this is standard Deku trivia. Everyone knows it! You might as well ask me to tell you about All For One and the Third Dark Age!" I said dismissively.

"ALL FOR ONE?!" shouted All Might even as he spewed blood across the beach.

"The- the Third Dark Age?" you spluttered. "We get another one?"

"Ohhhhhhh, right. Future knowledge." I scratched my head. "That would explain why Nezu kept asking me basic history for the first few months here."

"You know what," you eventually said, "let's not even get into that. I'm gonna go buy like ten more notebooks and then you're going to tell me everything about your Deku. And then I'm gonna crack this Quirk wide open, whether it likes it or not."

Two weeks later, we found ourselves in your living room. Pictures and notes and a rainbow of strings decorated the walls; on day three you'd given up on hiding this from your mother, and two days after that you'd moved the whole mess out of your room to avoid damaging the All Might posters.

I was idly tossing a ball in the air from my position laying across your couch as you wore a circle in the carpet around the coffee table.

You stopped in the center of the room and put your hands on your hips. "I'm missing something," you declared. "I can draw the line from All Might to The Fifth, but then it's just gone. I have a few hypotheses for who the Third and Second could be, but without a through line it's nothing more than conjecture… what am I missing?"

"The point?" I offered. "We were supposed to be figuring out how to use it, not nailing down its entire history."

"The How always stems from What and Why," you told me. "If I can understand the Quirk, I should be able to use it easier."

"You just don't want to blow your nards off again," I accused.

"No," you hissed. "No, I do not."

Your mother chose this moment to come in with a tray of tea and cookies. I immediately sat up straight on the couch; your mother's snacks were to die for.

"Thanks, Mrs. Midoriya," I called out as I reached out to snag a cookie, only to find it pulling back against my grip. I slowly looked up.

"Eri, dear," your mother said with a saccharine smile, "if my Izuku ends up sterilizing himself with All Might's Quirk before he can get me grandbabies, I will be holding you personally responsible. Am I clear?"

I gulped. "Crystal, ma'am."

She released her Quirk on the cookie.

The doorbell rang, and we all froze.

"Code green," you whispered, and the two of us scrambled to cover up the giant map of government secrets with a thick blanket while your mother went to stall at the door.

A muffled, squeaky voice came from the mail flap. "Hello! It's me, Nezu! Am I a mouse, a bear, or a dog? More importantly, I'm here to speak to your son about his internet history!"

Your face immediately went white.

Your mother gave an undignified squawk before looking at you across the room with a mixture of fear and embarrassment. "Well- I mean- He's a growing boy- it surely can't be that bad-"

You flushed red. "I WENT ON THE DARKWEB TO FIND INFORMATION ON ALL FOR ONE, I DIDN'T- NOT THAT!"

"Oh, thank God," your mother sighed in relief.

"That being said," squeaked the mail flap, "I would rather appreciate it if someone let me in. Nemuri-san keeps telling me that lockpicking is rude, and taking the vents would be a little too cliched for my tastes."

I abandoned my end of the blanket to open the door for the three-foot tall albino rat-man who was, in all technicality, my adoptive father.

Mrs. Midoriya let out an almost inaudible coo. "Awww, look at him," she mumbled to herself. "He's a tiny little man in a tiny little suit."

I crouched down, grabbed him under his armpits not unlike how one might pick up a cat, and held him up in the air at arm's length. He held his arms out stiffly at the contact.

I regarded him evenly. "Father," I declared.

He nodded to me. "Excellent work, Eri; a stunning reversal of the traditional Comedic Child-Brandishing Grip. I shall reply with Gesture Of Parental Affection #192: Proud Headpat."

He pointed his arms at me for a moment. I obligingly held him close enough for him to reach the top of my head, which he neatly bopped three times with his paw.

Paternal duties fulfilled, he pointed his arms straight up and shimmied out of my grip, straightening his tie as he landed on the floor. "Now, I'm sure many of you are wondering what exactly brought the Principal of UA to your home on this fine evening."

"Midoriya's internet history, apparently," I snarked.

"Hey," you shouted indignantly from where you were attempting to disentangle yourself from the blanket I'd dropped on you.

Nezu climbed up onto the coffee table and picked up a cookie. "As Principal of UA- and a Hero in my own right- I make it my duty to keep tabs on both promising young heroes and dangerous information; the two of which appear to have coincided here."

He took a bite out of the cookie, then continued. "I am aware of your status as the newest Wielders of One For All, and in light of such I have chosen to personally sate your curiosities rather than risk you to the treacherous tides and eddies of the dark sea of intelligence gathering this early in the game."

He glanced up at your corkboard insanity sprawling across the walls, then nodded. "Yes, I see where you got stuck. Allow me to illuminate the dark recesses of history that conceal what answers you seek. We begin in the year 2138, as the Second Dark Age begins to truly set in-"

"I GOT IT," you declared, cutting off the ramblings of the rodentine supergenius. "IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!"

Nezu blinked. "But I didn't even get to-"

"I was stuck on the identity of the Fourth, right? The Fifth, Banjo Daigoro aka Lariat, had no acquaintances, allies, enemies, or even coincidental meetings with any people who fit the bill of having the Quirk- or any of the other Quirks that fall under One for All."

"Yes, but-"

"But I was never going to find anyone who had One for All. Because I forgot one key factor!" You slapped the wall next to a blurry picture of a bald man walking a dog. "Animals can have Quirks, and Banjo Daigoro had a dog."

"What," said Nezu flatly.

My eyes widened. "Good Boy," I whispered.

You pointed at me. "Exactly," you crowed. "The Fourth Wielder was a dog with the Quirk to transform into a human! And since we're already human, the only thing that Quirk can do to us is manipulate our anatomies!"

The rat-man standing on the coffee table fell to his knees in defeat.

You cackled maniacally, pulling out a bright orange string and drawing a line between the vague image of Lariat walking his dog, all the way across the room to a jpeg artifact-riddled picture of a dark-skinned woman holding a puppy. "And it confirms the identity of the Third, too! I HAVE THE THROUGH LINE!"

Nezu looked down at his cookie mournfully. "But… my lecture…"

Mrs. Midoriya shyly approached the diminutive principal. "Don't worry, Mr. Nezu, I thought your lecture was interesting."

"You only heard 2.1933% of it," he lamented. "But I do appreciate the consolation, however trite it may be."

Mrs. Midoriya slowly reached out to pet him.

He simply bowed his head and held out his arms. "I suppose that's all I am now. With my pride shattered and wisdom unheeded, all that is left for me is to be petted and cooed over like any other small animal. Out with it, then! Have at me! Mete out your punishment, o cruel mistress of fate, but know I will not forget your caprice on this day!"

Mrs. Midoriya took that as the invitation it only technically was, and began petting the principal with a blissful smile.

"So," All Might wondered as the three of us stood on Dagobah Beach once more. "How did that actually help you figure out how to use One For All?"

You blinked. "Well, I know more about it now."

He stared at you for a moment. "And…?" I eventually prompted you.

"And what?" you asked.

I put my hands on my hips. "So you're telling me we did all that work-"

"I did all that work," you corrected.

I sighed. "We did all that work, and you made no progress on Full Cowl?"

You frowned. "Full Cowl? Is that- oh. Oh. You know what, yeah, that would work, wouldn't it?"

I blinked. "What?"

You simply dropped back into your power pose and started crackling with thinner bolts of green lightning. "It was in the name! I just had to, you know, wrap it around myself to distribute the force instead of letting it sit inside me as one big chunk!"

You tried to take a step but shot forward about three yards before catching on the sandy ground, immediately spinning head over ass about a dozen times before slamming directly into the beach. "Ow."

I groaned. "So you're telling me I could have just said 'Full Cowl' two weeks ago and we would have been able to skip that whole bit?"

You spat out a mouthful of sand. "Yeah, probably."

I sighed, then dropped into a mimicry of your power pose. The thrum of One for All ran through me, like a current just under my skin that I'd known was there but had been too afraid of extreme bodily harm to touch. Wrap it around myself, huh? Well, how about this?

I began glowing slightly, leaving magenta afterimages behind me as I moved my arms. "Oh, sick, mine looks different," I commented idly.

You stopped trying to get the sand out of your nose to take a look. "Oh, that's actually really interesting. Now that you bring it up, All Might doesn't have lightning around him when he uses his Quirk, so I guess everyone has a unique tell for it. I wonder if-"

I tuned you out for a moment to focus on the power rushing through me; instead of risking the embarrassing failure you just demonstrated, I chose to test out the technique with something simpler.

"Hyah!" I shouted as I punched towards the ocean. I feel like I definitely split the sea, or at least caused some interesting waves. I didn't really get time to find out since the recoil threw me into the air, spinning me head over ass about a dozen times before slamming me directly into the beach. "Ow."

"Heh," you mumbled, "I bet you forgot yours is stronger than mine."

"Fuck you," I replied weakly.

Months passed. The two of us quickly got past the "eating sand" phase of using One For All, and our growth accelerated with the realization that simply practicing with the Quirk put our bodies under enough strain that it counted as a full workout.

Soon enough, we were sparring on that sandy beach with All Might watching over us. I was stronger than you, so you got quicker. You learned every dirty trick in the book, and I learned to counter them. Exam season drew closer, and we wove review questions in between our punches and kicks.

And suddenly, we found ourselves watching the sunrise on the day of the entrance exam. And All Might hugged us close, and told us that no matter what happened, he was already proud of us. And maybe I cried, and maybe you did too, but when we stepped off that train to UA two hours later, we were ready to make history.

Do I even have to spell it out? Two students from one school. Two testing arenas. Two streaks of color, tearing through metal like tissue paper. Two Zero-Point Robots. Two truly gargantuan heaps of scrap metal, left smoking by the end of the test. Two students, tied for first. One with a record for most Villain Points, the other having capped out on Rescue Points.

Two letters from UA. Two assignments to class 1A. Two hologram projections of All Might fighting through tears to tell us, welcome to Our Hero Academia.

One promise, that from that day on, it'd always be the two of us. I had your back, and you had mine. However different we might have been, we were just two sides to the same coin. We had the same Quirk, the same secrets, the same legacy on our shoulders. We had a bond deeper than blood, the two of us, and we'd both be damned before we let that slip out of our fingers.

Two UA uniforms, one with a skirt and one with pants. I stole your pants, and then got Nezu to send you a new pair. It was the principle of the matter, you understand.

Two letters asking if we wanted to move into the dorms- apparently, my "future knowledge" indicated this was a good move for Nezu to make- met with two enthusiastic yesses and a tearful hug from your mom. One car, since I already lived with the Big Cheese himself and had to carry my stuff approximately three yards to get to the dorms (and had done so four days before anyone else was to be let in).

And that's how we found ourselves. With a pile of your stuff, on the doorstep of Heights Alliance's 1A building, the night before our first day of class.

I drew a breath. You drew, like, five. In retrospect I'm pretty sure you were hyperventilating, but whatever.

And together, we opened the door.