Chapter 65: School Faculty: Leaks by huskynator/kirbymanx
It was Wednesday. A half-day for the students, but for the staff, the day is still ongoing.
Principal Akuma gathered all the School Faculty not currently sick in bed into the auditorium for a discussion.
Akuma floated above the auditorium's podium. Vice-Principal Accord sat on the podium's edge.
"Thank you all for coming, ma." Akuma politely greeted his valued School Faculty. "For those who somehow haven't heard, we finally have received the rest of the insurance money for… Miss Tamura's sonic outburst…" Some of the staff shivered, Satan especially. "And we got money to spare."
"On top of the funds, we usually get around this time of year." Accord helpfully added.
"Indeed, kuma." Akuma nodded. "Accord and I have already allocated 35% of it to the essentials."
"35%? Is it me… or does that seem like a lot?" The newest faculty member Dr. Felix felt like voicing.
Dr. Felix (Floor 3 Nurse)
Animal/Demihuman Doctor
"It is, ma." The principal calmly replied.
"...Sooo… What does that… go to?"
"That's confidential, mamakuuma!" Akuma had bad timing for his sudden yelling. But his closest confidants Mamono, Accord, and Satan backed Akuma up here. Dr. Felix seemed satisfied.
"I got a list here." Accord playfully wiggled her clipboard. "It orders everyone here alphabetically via last name if applicable. Please raise concerns the school should address or bring up activities for the students to do." She giggled.
"The concerns don't include Popoi, WE'LL CATCH HIM EVENTUALLY MAMAKUMA!"
"My, my, jumping ahead there a little, Akuma?" Accord teased her harumph-ing boss. "But indeed. Don't worry about Popoi for now. Now, who's first on the list?" The vice-principal pointed her finger at her clipboard.
Half of the school's staff rolled their eyes.
"It's Harmony Accord. Oh dear, it's me." Accord played it a little playfully, in the same way a kindergarten teacher with a lot of patience would amuse the kindergarteners. "Akuma already knows, but I wanted to take our students on a field trip. It has been a few years since the last one we had."
The majority of the faculty seemed receptive to it.
"But I'm afraid I'll sacrifice my suggestion and just downscale it to a theater play yet again. But one where the students come together to make a wholly new play. Each grade doing their own." Accord's mood subtly went from solemn to optimistic. All still with a semblance of a smile.
The majority agreed.
"Marvelous~" Accord wrote her suggestion down as a maybe. "Next on the list is Akuma. Want to tell where some of that 35% money is going to?"
Akuma seemed hesitant to answer. But he gave the answer he thinks is the least confidential. "Roughly 5% of that goes to my wards, ma. The rest goes to measures to keep the school safe, kumama!"
The staff that heard that for the first found that answer acceptable. Nothing they didn't already know or figured out though.
"Other than that I have nothing new to suggest for this school." Akuma spoke.
"Next is you, Kikimora."
"Can we finally drain that flooded spare classroom of all its water?" Kikimora has been asking that for a few years now.
"Oh, dear. Writing that down." Accord scribbled. "I so rarely go to the third floor, I keep forgetting." She giggled. "Anything else, Kikimora?"
"I need a new mop. This one's getting weary." The janitor walked up to her superior showing off her mop.
"I see." Accord wrote down.
"Preferably reinforced." She turned to Akuma, getting his attention. "Other than that if you can find a good washing machine on sale for me and your kid's clothes, it'll give your plush body a lovely, authoritative, respectable shine?" Kikimora batted her eyes at her boss.
"You had me until THE LAST PART, MAMAKUMA! The washing machine we currently have is just fine, ma."
Accord giggled. Making Akuma dread. "Maybe a more shiny coat would attract Popoi more to you…" Accord teased Akuma in front of the faculty.
Akuma was honestly hesitant to give an answer under this pressure.
The possessed teddy bear let out a spiritual groan. "I know you're manipulating me, Accord, ma… Write it down as maybe, kuma…"
"Yes!" Kikimora cheered, raising her hand for a high five with Accord which they did.
"A victory for the school~ to be sure." Accord said sing-songy. "Dr. Bonnett?"
"Just some resupplies. That's all."
"Written down. Now, how about you, Mr. Enneé?"
Risukuma cleared his throat. "One computer bricked in the computer lab. But that is all. Just one computer, that can wait for another time." Everyone agreed.
"Very well. Mr. deFrosch?"
"Well Ah got nothin', nohoho."
"No. thin'." Accord wrote down. "Dapper Bones?"
"Nothing that wouldn't be considered frivolous I'm sure." The skeleton man said, poking fun at himself.
Half the room laughed, including Accord. "Mr. Hohowbird?"
"Hoho! I got nothing to report other than Popoi hasn't shown up on any cameras. Is he invisible, hoho?"
"No, ma." Akuma shook his head. "It just shows he knows when to hide in the students' shadows, kumama…"
"Mr. Deh-"
"Hoho! Not done yet! My new-hoho sidekick, Squares wants an answer why Schezo and his friends haven't been expelled yet?" Half the room made noises, none of them positive.
"Tell Mr. Rondehol that this School has too few students. We can't afford to expel them."
"No-hoho-ted!" The security chief Hoho saluted. Nohoho felt like being infringed upon.
"Mr. DeHun?" Accord pointed at the gardening orc in the room.
"Oh, all I'd like are some Tulip seeds, Ms. Accord."
Orkte (School Gardener)
Gentle Green Giant
"Tulip Seeds." Accord repeated as she wrote it down. "Any specific color?"
"It doesn't matter. Any will do." The orc said with a smile.
"Anything you'd like to change about the school or need for your class, Mamono?"
"Grok Grok."
(Translation: Nothing you or Akuma, don't already know, Harmony.)
Mamono (Supernatural Prevention and Recognition Class)
The Longest-Running Employee
"Crystal Clear." Accord said half-jokingly. "Wish, your wish?"
"I have nothing to say." Professor Wish said.
"Simple and clean. Your turn, Sataaaan~"
"Please don't start teasing me. As for what this school's needs, the gym's climbing climbing ropes need replacing, I injured my wings trying to glide to safe ground as I was falling to the mat." The people there winched, they assumed he fell on his wings. It's probably why Satan refused the make his wings appear.
"Oh my, sorry to hear that, Satan." Accord said genuinely worried for her friend.
"I'll live." He tried the play it cool. "Finally, Miss Centauros accidentally burned her book again. She need a replacement… Again."
"That's all?" Satan gave Accord a nod. "Mr. Lemres?"
"I'd like to teach everyone to make some layer cake." The senior student/teacher said with enthusiasm.
"My, a little extravagant, but they deserve a bit of fun." Accord scribbled. "Dr. Scallopworth?"
"I have nothing Professor, Accord."
Otomo (Biology, Zoology, Oceanography and Sex Ed)
He gets his subtitle a third time because the second time was an accident.
"Very well, Dr. Steuerhund?"
"I am very worried about some students' psyches. But I am sure we're are gonna go into that in another day. In terms of things I need much like some of my many of my colleagues here, I have nothing."
Dr. Ai (Counselor)
Elegant Skittish School Counselor
The humanoid dog, Dr. Ai, voiced his concerns to his fellow counselor.
"I'm sure they'll pull through." Accord smiled. "Dr. Tiraboschi?"
"I need some resupplies… as well. Like Dr. Bonnet."
"Times 2." Accord whispered out loud. "And finally, anything you need, Mr. Zed?"
"I'd would like to diversify the menu, and give the students more nutritious meals." The TetraTech robot humbly asked.
Satan seconded that, but he needed to get over how sentient this robot was.
"A good suggestion~" Accord wrote down. "We shall take all of these into consideration and what should take priority, as we usually do~" She spoke with her secretary-like mannerisms. "Akuma, it's your turn to rant about Popoi, dear~" She said with a light-hearted jest towards her superior and friend.
Akuma really wished she'd stop teasing him in public, Satan related. "Any Popoi sightings, kuma?"
The answers were disappointing. Some sightings of that shadow demon ruining the students' homework and stressing them out to hell and back. But none ever are shown on camera or definitively actually seen. Very few could describe what Popoi actually looks like based on first-hand accounts.
This was just the usual response when the sightings start unless Popoi was lying low.
Akuma let out another spectral sigh. Disappointed, but not at his friends and employees. "Thank you, makuma. One last thing, kumama. Have any of you had any sudden overclocked emotional outbursts or seen any more students have any emotional outbursts that seem unreasonably strong, ma, makuma?"
The school faculty themselves haven't felt something themselves. But they had a few maybe cases for the students.
"Thank you all, kumama!" The principal thanked them, and vice-principal Accord wrote it all down. "With the exception of Ms. Accord, Mr. Prince, Mamono, Ms. Blakelock, and Mr. deFrosch you are all dismissed, ma. Come back on Saturday." They will reveal where they've allocated the funds on that day.
The staff gave their usually affable byes as they one by one left the auditorium. The room echoed with small talk until it was all quiet.
All that was left were Akuma, Accord, Satan, Mamono, Kikimora, and Nohoho.
"Yer're gonna tell me not to forget to allocate 20% to those magical defenses again?" The human-sized frog said smugly while playing with a coin, fairly safe bet on his part.
"Surrounded by wise-asses, ma." Nohoho and Accord laughed at Akuma's frustration. "Yes. And still don't ask me why."
"Wasn't gonna ask, nohoho." The Frog said as he dismissed himself.
…
Everyone had their eyes on Nohoho until he was behind the door.
Accord held up her closed hand and counted up to 5.
"Friends… I fear his influence is leaking through again…"
"We know." Kikimora said. "You never stop talking about that shadow creature."
"I'll keep making sure your kids are safe from Popoi." The Janitor spoke with a wink.
…
…
…
…
"What? Why's the room so tense all of the sudden?" Kikimora wasn't expecting it.
"Grok… Grok…" Mamono choked up.
(Translation: Kikimora, sweetie… We aren't… talking about… Popoi…)
Janitor was taken aback. Sure Mamono was always a bit of a crybaby, but this was different…
"Wait… Is this… about that guy you locked up in the catacombs?"
Akuma, Mamono, Accord, and Satan nodded. Akuma and Mamono especially.
"Shit." Was all Kikimora could say.
"His return is inevitable, ma… Accord show the graph…"
Accord gestured everyone to come closer to her to what was on her clipboard. It showed the statistics of the past 2 decades. It was fairly stagnant, as it should. But then they noticed that this year's statistics match the last decades.
And this year was far from over.
Everyone had a tinge of fear crawling up and down their spines.
"Grok!?"
(Translation: It's getting that bad again!?)
"Quite, Mamono, ma. And unless we can FINALLY convince the government WE really need more funds, kumama!"
"Grok…"
(Translation: Why did he have to make this a school…)
"..." The two demons had a solemn moment.
"So we gotta be weary of unreasonably strong emotional outbursts until he comes back?" Satan asked. Clutching his arms, remembering his last encounter with someone affected…
"We have no idea when he'll come back… But I pray it's at least during next summer vacation…" Akuma may as well have been gritting his teeth.
Accord spoke up, speaking matter of factly. "The average of these overclocked emotional outbursts each year is 2." She flipped her charts to fact-check that. "When it isn't spiking up because we're low on funds to suppress it, that is. Now that we're lacking funds, his magical influence is leaking through once again, and has already affected 3 known cases. And if even half of those suspected cases mentioned mere minutes ago are true... That is frightening." She said calmly.
"Yoko, Ess, and…..?" Satan made a motion with his hand.
"Miss Peruvis Priestley, ma." The three confirmed cases this year. "She seemed to be affected the same day as Miss Yoko Tamura, ma." Akuma recapped.
"Gee… I wonder why." The human janitor spoke sarcastically.
"An unfortunate case, based on eye-witnesses it seems Miss Priestley was the straw that made Miss Yoko's mind snap." Accord placed her cheek on her hand…
"And that's when his influence got to her…" Satan tried to relax his stance on the angel. 'I forget sometimes.'
"Grok…"
(Translation: Poor kids…)
"And that's not going into any undocumented cases, ma. Sometimes we just can't be sure if someone's emotions are overclocked, kuma… Be weary my friends. If you see a clear case of overclocked emotions, make sure they can healthily vent it out. And that goes for you four as well, ma."
His friends affirmed.
"And Kikimora." The Janitor stood at attention, having a good idea where this is going. "If my wards get affected…" That felt heavy to say to my principal. "Find me so they can hug the daylights out of my body." The possessed plush said. "Yu & Rei don't need any more trauma."
He dearly wished his wards could be housed anywhere else. But this school was Akuma's home. So it's their home as well…
Authors' Notes:
HUSK: We're back. Can't say if things will happen frequently again, though.