Chapter 16: Heart to Heart

Jasper

Saturday, December 16, 2023

Forks, Washington

I'm elbows deep into our Christmas boxes that are still stacked in the garage when I hear a car pull into our driveway. I dislodge myself from an old hat box Alice keeps the tree topper in, and turn to see my dad's car.

I lift a hand toward the car in greeting, stepping away from the boxes to head toward the driveway. To my surprise, both my parents climb out of the car.

"Hey!" I call.

"Hi, Honey. Is Alice around?" Mom's got a massive casserole dish in her hands, and I swallow hard, gratitude suddenly overwhelming me.

"Yeah, she's inside with Evie."

Mom nods and blows me a kiss before hurrying up the front steps towards the house. I turn to my dad who gives me a friendly smile.

"Your mom's trying out a few new recipes," Dad says, shrugging one shoulder. "Our house is filled with casseroles right now."

It's probably a lie, but it's a lie I'm more than willing to hear. I hope Alice is just as recpitve. She's been weird about food lately.

If I'm honest with myself, it's not just food with her.

"Are you finally getting your lights up?" Dad asks, and I blink, pulling myself out of my thoughts to focus on him.

"Yeah, I figure it's overdue."

Dad nods and rubs his hands together. "All right. Let's get started. You and Alice always have more lights than the rest of the town, but if we both work fast, we can probably finish it all by tonight."

I'm touched by his offer to help. "Thanks, Dad."

He nods and reaches for a box. He's right, Alice and I have always had the biggest light display we could. Even in our tiny apartment, we'd managed to decorate every window and strung lights up on every exterior wall we were given access to.

"So," Dad says as we start hauling boxes into the center of the garage. "How is work going?"

I glance at him and shrug. "It's fine," I say slowly.

"What's the matter?" Dad asks, immediately picking up on my hesitation.

I sigh. "I really love the work. It's always made me so fulfilled. But since Evie was born, we've never been so strapped. I can't make enough teaching at Forks High." I let out a tense breath. "Part of me wonders if I should quit and find a job that will actually support my family."

I don't look at my dad as the words I've bottled up for months finally come out of me. The truth is, my family is struggling in so many ways, and it's within my power to fix so many of our issues.

It would just be at the cost of losing a job that I love.

"It's no easy thing," Dad says slowly. I look up at him. "Being a parent," he clarifies. "Your mom and I really struggled the first year or so when Emmett was born. We even had to move back in with my parents." Dad shakes his head.

"Grandma Cullen was the best," I provide.

"Oh, my mother was over the moon about it. But my old man," Dad stops and lets out a gruff laugh, shaking his head. "I thought no one could be harder on me than I was being on myself, but I was wrong. My father pushed me to finish med school, forced me to become a doctor." Dad looks at me. "I was going to quit. I realized that the hours it took in my life weren't worth losing out on time with my family. But no, the great Wallace Cullen wouldn't hear of it. If I had quit, he would have kicked us out."

I stared at him in shock. "I had no idea."

Dad shrugged. "It worked out in the end. I found a path that worked for me and supported my family. We moved out right when Mom got pregnant with you, got our own little house that actually got your mom started in her career." Dad pops open a box and shrugs. "We were too young to know what we wanted until it found us."

"You think I should quit teaching?" I ask, my throat tight.

"Jasper," Dad says, looking up at me. "You've got something we never had when we were in your position." His face is so serious, I stop trying to open boxes. "You've got unconditional love and support from your family. If you want to make things work with your job now, we're here to help and support you figure that out. If you want a switch up, we'll support that too."

My throat feels tight and I blink hard, trying to stop the tears I can feel burning in the back of my eyes.

"Thanks, Dad."

My father nods and picks up another box. "How's Alice doing?"

I wince and instinctively glance at the house. "I don't know," I say slowly. "She's always been the most capable and energetic person I've ever known. Now, it's like she's just spinning in circles, trying to find her feet."

Dad lets out a heavy breath. "We've been worried about her. Both of you, really."

I look at him. "I don't know how to help her," I admit. "She doesn't want any help, absolutely bites my head off every time I try to suggest something, but I know she's just making it harder on herself." I shake my head. "Is this normal?"

Dad hums. "It could be postpartum depression," he says. "I thought for Alice it would dissipate in a few weeks, but it hasn't, has it?"

I shake my head and he nods.

"The best thing for Alice would be to see her doctor to start treatment. I've seen some women fight it for years."

I blink. "Years?"

Dad nods. "Your Aunt Carol. Hers went unchecked for far too long. She just lived with it and no one knew to suggest help for her. It wasn't until your cousin was almost five that she finally saw someone about it."

I shake my head, trying to recall the aunt I've rarely seen. By my hazy memories of her when I was a kid, she was high strung, anxious, and mentally absent. I had no idea that stemmed from pregnancy.

"How can I help Alice?" I ask Dad, determined to not let my wife sink that low into this.

"She needs to consult her doctor. There are different forms of treatment. Some rely on medication, others seeing a psychiatrist. She needs to know what's going on with her and then figure out what she needs personally to get through this." Dad pulls a string of lights out of one of the boxes. "Emmett and Rose are coming into town tomorrow, and Bella got in last night. Maybe being surrounded by loved ones will help Alice realize that she's in a safe place and that we're all here for her."

I think about our friends who all love my wife unconditionally. "Do you think it'll be enough?" I ask.

Dad sighs. "For Alice's sake, I hope so."