Chapter Seventy-Seven

It was an hour later, and Sharon was feeling content. When she came out to the sitting room, Heath was waiting for her. He had indicated the wheeled table that the hotel personnel had brought up. Two chairs had been positioned by the table; Heath had pulled one out for her. As he had done so, Heath told her how lovely she looked.

Sharon had seen the desire in his eyes, and the wave of panic started to overcome her. She sat very straight, and happily accepted the glass of champagne that Heath offered. By the second sip she was feeling better, and wondered if the brandy was starting to affect her. The aroma of food brought her to the present, and she smiled at Heath.

The meal was lamb, with red currant jelly, new potatoes, and roasted carrots. There were sourdough rolls, butter, and a relish tray. Sharon appreciated how well prepared the lamb was and told Heath that. He shared the story about Nick and the sheep that he had won in a poker game, which had them laughing.

Once they were done with dinner, they had strawberries with cream and sugar, as they finished the champagne. Heath helped her up from the table and escorted her into the sitting room. After getting her settled on the small couch, he went and poured them both snifters of brandy.

"Can we a drink a toast to our new beginning?" Heath raised his glass to her. He was taken aback to see her eyes widen with worry.

Sharon for her part understood what he was asking for and knew that she would have to tell Heath about her marriage to Paul. She had already, in a roundabout way, told Reverend Peterson about the union. Further she had told Eamonn everything, but that was different.

As she had that thought, it bothered her how easy it had been to tell Eamonn. Of course, she and Eamonn shared a deep connection – it wasn't just their heritage, but their past, and how they viewed the world.

She looked over at Heath and knew what a good man he was. Further he was well built and strong – Sharon took note of his well-muscled body. He had been so wonderful to her – and her children – which she appreciated. She could see herself falling in love with him all over again.

Sharon reminded herself that everything happened for a reason, and one of the Lord's greatest gifts was unanswered prayers. Sharon wanted to have a marriage to him – to be his wife – and understood the leap of faith she would have to take. She would tell him everything, even admitting how horrid her first marriage had been. Hopefully Heath would be kind.

Heath, after making the toast became concerned when she stayed perfectly still. Everything had been going so well, but waiting for her response he felt like Sharon held his life in her hands. Did she really want to be married to him? Her voice broke up the tailspin his thoughts were doing.

"Before we can drink a toast to our new beginning, I have to tell you about my first marriage." Sharon sat up very straight and looked at him with concern in her eyes. The Heath she saw now was the man she had known all those years ago – kind, gentle, caring – however the man she had seen the last several months was cold and unfeeling.

Sharon wondered if he would take the position that the mad priest had – the same position that Reverend Peterson had told her that other men of the cloth would take – it was always the wife's fault. She wanted to think that Heath would not be like that, but then she remembered the matter-of-fact way he had talked about Simon.

"Your first marriage?" Heath felt like he was treading into unknown waters. He had always been curious about the marriage – why had it happened so fast – and why had Sharon been left destitute? A part of him recoiled at having to address what was probably a messy situation. He privately acknowledged how he struggled dealing with personal emotions.

"Yes, my first marriage! I assume you remember I was married before." Sharon retorted; seeing the distaste on his face. Her fears were all coming home to her, about what his reaction would be. Only the thought of Sean and Tara kept her on the sofa. Her children needed a father, and she knew that Heath was a good man – a man she loved once and could love again.

"When I received the letter from my mother, telling me about your marriage" Heath set the snifter down on the table and took hers to set on the table. He took her hands in his, hoping he could do this. "My world turned upside down, and my heart felt like it was breaking."

"Oh Heath, I hated hurting you, but at the time I really thought it was for the best." Sharon looked into his eyes and saw so many emotions. She now understood that this conversation would be as difficult for him as it was for her. It was though a conversation they needed to have if they were to move forward.

"It hurt so much when I turned you down, but at the time I thought it was the best decision for you." Sharon explained in a sad voice. "Once you left, I was so unhappy, that I cried almost every day. I am sorry I hurt you Heath." She looked up at him, waiting to see what he said next.

"How did you end up with Paul?" Heath had wondered about that for so long. He had noticed that she rarely talked about the man, even as he recalled Priscilla's comment that she did not think the marriage had been happy.

"Not too long after you left, Paul and his mother came to the settlement. They were cousins, but from County Kildare, which north and east from County Kilkenny; next to Dublin. I had not met them before." She took a deep breath.

"As I said I was unhappy, and Paul noticed it right away. He made it a point to spend time with me and paid me a great deal of attention. It didn't hurt that he was very handsome – and charming." Sharon shook her head ruefully, as she thought about him.

"Everyone noticed it, and before long there was a great deal of pressure to marry him. He had proposed within a month, but I thought it was too soon. I rather think now that Granny Callahan was concerned that you would come back. Jimmy was the only one on my side, but it wasn't enough. I gave in and married him."

"Was it a good marriage?" Heath released her hands and took a sip from his brandy. He was not surprised that Granny Callahan acted like she had – the woman had never liked him.

"The only good that came out of it was Sean and Tara – well Mother Flynn also. Paul drank, he gambled, he was lazy – and he beat me." Sharon said the last words very fast, wanting to get them out.

"Sharon I am so sorry you had to endure that." Without a second thought Heath pulled her into his arms and held her close. "Couldn't his mother or Jimmy help you?" Even as he asked, Heath knew what the answer would be.

"Paul was careful around his mother, and I was certainly not going to tell my family. I did try to talk to the priest, but he told me that it was my fault, and I needed to be a better wife." Sharon put her arms around his waist, liking how secure she felt.

"How did he pass?" He was sure now that she had not been a grieving widow, based on what she had told him.

"It was awful – if he had not died Liam would have killed him for what he did." Sharon sat up and reached for the snifter to have some brandy. "Uncle Jimmy and Liam had purchased some horses, including a valuable thoroughbred stallion. They were able to get him cheaply because no one had been able to completely train him. Liam was sure that he could and was slowly working with him. The horse would be the anchor for the breeding program."

"Paul was a good horseman when he was sober, but dangerous and reckless when he was drunk. Liam had declared the horse off limits to everyone, which only encouraged Paul to do what he did." She bit her lip, remembering how she had tried to talk Paul out of what he was going to do. His response was to grab her arm and twist it before he shoved her to the floor. Sharon told Heath all that, and he reached over to hold her hand.

"It is good that he is dead, because otherwise I would have killed him if I had known what he had done." Heath shook his head, appalled at what he was hearing. "What happened next?"

"He took the horse, and decided he would teach it to jump – the end result was that Paul broke his neck, and the horse broke a leg. Liam cried after having to shoot him." Sharon looked sad, and then went on "as you can imagine I was not a grieving widow."

"Thank you for telling me all this; I know it took a great deal of courage." Heath took her in his arms, now understanding. "I am not proud of my behavior over the last several months – I took advantage of your economic circumstances because of Simon, I was not always kind, but know it was because I was trying not to fall in love with you. Finally, I apologize again for the accusation I made and you and Eamonn. I was so jealous of him." Heath pulled back and looked her in the eye as he made the declaration.

"I am not perfect, but I promise I will never treat you like Paul did; please know that." Heath waited for her reaction and was relieved when she smiled.

"You are a good man, a good father, and I know you will never be anything like Paul." Sharon had been pleased with how well it had gone, but there was still one more thing she had to tell him. "When I said my marriage was not good, it included the personal relations." Suddenly she felt embarrassed, and at a loss for words.

"I would think it would be hard to have good feelings for a man who acted like your husband did." Heath took her in his arms and held her tenderly. "Please tell me, so I know what we need to do together."

"After we were married Paul never hugged or kissed me. When we had relations, he would push himself inside me, and then it was all over quickly. As you can imagine it was not pleasant, and usually painful." Sharon shuddered, and Heath pulled her closer. "When I was with child he would leave me alone, but right afterwards he would insist on his rights.

"Would you let me show you how pleasurable relations can be?" He asked and saw that she answered with a tremulous nod of her head. "Before we can have relations, I will need to undress you – and then you will need to undress me." Heath had a plan that involved going very slow. She was like a young filly who had not been saddled before. His technique of gentling was what Sharon needed.

Sharon watched as Heath knelt down on the floor and lifted her skirt to above her knees. He then lifted her right leg, cradling her ankle, as he gently removed her slipper. The feel of his hand on her ankle was making her breathless, but when his other hand started rubbing her foot, she felt shivers going up and down her body.

"There is the matter of the other shoe" Heath had lowered her right leg, and lifted her left leg, repeating what he had done. Sharon could not believe how calm and as a matter of fact he sounded, when she was overwhelmed at the feelings he was causing.

"Mmm, you do have nice legs." He looked up at her with a wicked grin, his eyes filled with admiration. "These are very pretty stockings; I like the floral embroidery." Heath's fingers stroked the outside of her legs, exploring the decoration. For Sharon, his fingers felt like they were caressing her calves, while she felt like jelly.

"Pretty though they are, we do need to get them off" Heath sat back on his heels and looked up at her "could you lift your skirt higher?" He had been very aware of her response, which was exciting him greatly.

"Lift my skirt?" Sharon felt like her brain was mush.

"Yes, I need you to lift your skirt so I can undo your garters and take off your stockings." He made it a point to keep his voice flat, so as not to startle her.

"Of course" she replied, as she pulled the lace skirt up to her thighs, feeling very risqué as she did so. Heath though was her husband, so she should not feel embarrassed.

"Very pretty garters – I am looking forward to seeing them more often." Heath had started by stroking the inside of her right ankle before he moved up to the garter that was above her knee. He made it a point to let his fingers linger and stroke and was very aware of what it was doing to her.

The garters were ivory silk elastic, decorated with seed pearls. His fingers moved above the garter just a bit, as he stroked her inner thigh. Her gasp, as her thighs parted ever so slightly pleased him. Heath used his hands to remove the garter, slowly sliding it down her leg. He repeated the motions with the other leg, ready to remove her stockings.

Sharon could not believe how gentle his hands were, even as it was like flames were dancing on her skin. After the stockings were off, he took her feet in his hands and rubbed them tenderly. It was all so lovely, thrilling, and exciting all at the same time.

"Has anyone ever told you what tiny, pretty feet you have? They fit in my hands." Heath played with her toes and stroked her arches which caused shivers of excitement to course through her body.

"I think we need to move the bedroom, so I can finish undressing you." Heath stood up and scooped her into his arms. Sharon was taken aback at the movement but put her arms around his neck. He reached down and gave her a light kiss, before moving into the bedroom.