It was about a month into freshman year. A month knowing Damon Salvatore. Everyday I felt more and more head over heels for my best friend. Caroline kept insinuating that he liked me back since he's popular and still single but hanging out with me. I didn't think so. I couldn't help to think that maybe he was holding back because I was fifteen and he was two years older than me and knew that I wasn't allowed to date yet. Or maybe the age difference prevented us from ever being more than friends. I can't help but think about what will happen when he graduates being one year behind isn't that bad but two is hard. Caroline just wants me to tell him the truth and I know I can't. If I told Damon that I liked him it could ruin our friendship. There's a chance that he wouldn't want to me more than friends. It that's truth then I could lose him for just only being honest. It really sucks. Everytime I'm around him my heart races. It sounds ridiculous but I've never felt this way about someone before. It doesn't help that I'm fifteen and my hormones are still crazy. I've never even had my first kiss. He knows that too. He can get any secret out of me except the secret that I like him. During my freshman year I was always either with Caroline, Matt or Damon most of the time. It was rare that I was ever alone. I liked that. My family was never home so most of the time it'd just be me before this year. Even when Caroline lived with us she'd spend a lot of her time with Matt. When I got close to Damon he'd spend so much time at my house. He'd even use my balcony instead of my door when no one else was even home. It was romantic.
I walked into gym class. I had this class with a few of Damon's cheerleader friends. I always felt so self conscious in my shorts and tank top around these beautiful girls. It didn't help that Damon and all the others boys had gym class at the same time. Once in awhile our teachers would combine the classes for sport games. It was enough that I had to be around judgemental girls in this outfit, I didn't want Damon or Stefan to see this much of my disgusting body.
Rebekah and Vicky laughed while they stared at me warming up. "She thinks she has a shot with Damon." I overheard Rebekah say.
I was pretty sure she knew I could hear her. I felt horrible it was awful. I didn't understand how someone so sweet like Damon was ever friends with girls that were so mean. I looked over at the other side of the gym and Damon waved at me. I waved back and then turned my head toward Rebekah and Vicky. "Isn't that sweet?" I smirked as I watched them roll their eyes.
Becoming Damon's friend gave me a lot of confidence to be myself. I do own that to Damon he let me put my guard down and be myself. When you can be yourself with the most popular handsomest guy in school you can be yourself anywhere. I still didn't feel good about my body but I didn't have to hide who I was. The only thing I couldn't do with Damon is to be honest with him about my feelings. I've told him way worse than that he understood me. He listened and cared. So I knew if I ever did tell him how I feel he'd be a gentleman about it but no matter what it'd still ruin our friendship if he didn't like me back.
I spent Halloween with Caroline and Matt at Damon's party. It was his seventeenth birthday party he celebrates on Halloween because his birthday is so close to it. He's a year and 10 months older than me so for two months into the school year I was fifteen and he was sixteen. Technically for two months I could say he was only a year older than me. It was a fun party for most people I'm not the type of girl to get drunk at a house party. I had never been to a house party before and I wasn't sure if this counted because it was still a birthday and a costume party. I would have had more fun if Damon wasn't so busy thanking everyone for coming. I was dressed in normal clothes since I wasn't really into the Halloween thing this year. It was something I use to enjoy but I stopped liking it after fifth grade. My brother was dressed as spider man and I was a ariel. My older brother Jeremy was taking us out and he was with his girlfriend. He took his eye off of us and I ended up getting lost. It was terrifying for an ten year old. It was so dark out and I was looking for my brother but instead I was pushed down concrete steps. Some older kids thought it was funny so they took my candy then pushed me. It never appealed to me to ever dress up for Halloween again. Stefan did bother me that night. He was dressed in a vampire costume and he told me he wanted to sink his teeth into me. So classy. I wasn't falling for any of his bullshit.
Caroline and Matt came back from dancing all night. "Where's you boyfriend?" Matt asked me.
Caroline smacked his shoulder. "They aren't dating, shut up." She said in a bossy tone.
"It's fine." I scanned the room. "I haven't seen much of him tonight."
Caroline rubbed my arm. "It'll be okay, maybe you should go meet people." She wanted me to stop mopping.
"I'm not interested in meeting other people." My heart wanted Damon and I wasn't ready to move on.
She sighed. "You're miserable Elena! Just have some fun!" Caroline shouted.
Matt gave her a look. "I'm sorry Elena she's drunk and doesn't know what she's saying."
"It's fine." I was annoyed but I'll get over it.
"I'm going to get her home before her mom kicks my ass." He feared thinking about her cop mother finding out she was drinking.
I stood there alone for awhile. I didn't want to leave without getting to wish Damon a happy birthday. I didn't mind the weird looks or Rebekah and Vicky staring and making fun of me from a distance. I would put up with all of that for him. Enzo brought out the birthday cake and someone dimmed the lights as Damon walked into the room. We all sang him happy birthday and he was smiling. He looked so happy.
After he sang Enzo started cutting the cake and handing out pieces, Damon grabbed two plates and he walked over and handed one to me.
"Happy Birthday!" I shouted over the loud music.
He smiled. "Thank you!" Damon took a bite of his cake.
I started eating my piece as I didn't want to be rude. Damon finished his piece and went and helped Enzo with the rest of the cake. I threw my plate away and looked around before heading up to Damon's room. No one was allowed up here during the party but I didn't want to use the crowded downstair bathroom. I walked into Damon's room and into his bathroom, locking the door. I kneeled down at the toilet and emptied my stomach. This became a thing I did a few times a week. It made me feel better with my body. I had only lost three pounds but at least I wasn't gaining weight.
I cleaned myself up and then I rejoined the party. I was so bored after Caroline and Matt left. I didn't want to ruin Damon's birthday by following him around so I chilled by myself. I was really anxious watching everyone have a good time.
"Hey Elena!" Damon said, coming from the kitchen. "Having fun?"
"Yup!" I said with fake excitement.
"You're a bad liar." He laughed. He knew me so well.
"I'm sorry." I giggled.
"Let's get out of here." He smiled, grabbing my hand.
"What? You're having a party Damon!" I giggled at his suggestion.
"So? I'd rather have a good time with you." I blushed hard. He would rather spend time with me than be at his own birthday party.
We left the party and went for a walk by the lake.
"It's so pretty over here." I stared at the stars in the sky gleaming on the water. "I'd love to paint this one day."
Damon took out his phone and took a picture. "Now you can." He smiled.
"Thanks." We sat down on the grass. "How'd you enjoy your birthday?" I asked him as he laid back onto the grass.
I laid back too. "It was amazing. Thanks for coming, I know you get anxious around a lot of people. It means a lot that you put that aside to come celebrate." Damon said thankful.
"I would do anything for you." I said without thinking, I saw him smile briefly.
"Hey we should take a dip into the lake." Damon suggested as he stood put, pulling me up with him.
"What? It's October! Are you crazy?" I laughed.
"Yeah but it's not that cold out and we'll get use to the water." He took off his jacket. "Let's just have fun!"
"We don't have bathing suits." I was nervous at the idea of being in a bathing suit around anyone and especially him.
Damon pulled off his shirt and unbuckled his pants before pulling them off. He stood there in front of me in his boxers. I gulped and my hands were shaky, he was so sexy.
"Come on, have fun!" He said before heading into the freezing water.
I was hesitant to join him. I took off my skirt and jacket. I left my shirt on and joined him in the water. I felt better that it was dark out so he wouldn't be able to see much of me. I couldn't resist joining him even though I was terrified of him seeing this much of me. Damon was just so hypnotizing.
I got into the water and I was shaking. "It's so cold!" He swam closer to me and splashed me. "Hey!"
Damon stuck his tongue out at me. "Better seek some revenge." He splashed me again.
I forgot it was even cold. "Oh you know I will." I smirked and splashed him.
We had a splash fight for awhile before he forfeited and then a really nice conversation. I thought maybe he was going to make a move since this had felt so romantic but again he didn't. He kept his distance from me in the water. I still had a great time just being with him.
"It's getting late, we should get home." Damon said after twenty minutes.
We got out of the water and I was freezing in my wet shirt. I crossed my arms as I felt my nipples harden.
"Here take off those wet clothes and put on my shirt." He handed me his black shirt.
"But what about you? It's freezing." I looked at him as he was shivering too.
"I have my jacket." He turned around so i could get dressed. His shirt was so big on me but it was soft.
He walked me home. It was nice. I actually enjoyed Halloween for once.
Author's Note:
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