Chapter 18

Oakleigh blinked quickly when she felt the first tear fall, the drop rolling down her cheek.

She had been back for a little over a week now and helped Peper with Paperwork and Bruce with patching people up when things got a little too rough on missions.

This morning she had a late start, Pepper did not need her until noon so Oakleigh took her ice water and went out onto the balcony overlooking the back training field. For the last two hours, she watched her husband take that blonde trainee down to the matt multiple times.

A couple of those times it almost looked like the blonde, Kayla, game in on purpose and let herself be dropped. It was so innocent, at least on Bucky's side. They were outdoors, and Steve and Sam were watching, as well as the other trainees, it was not intimate or sexual. But that little evil voice in the back of her mind showed her a life Bucky could have with Kayla.

A strong confident badass woman, who was gorgeous. Oakliehg and Bucky had had a few more deep talks, trying to sort through things and be transparent, but this was the one thing Oakleigh refused to share with him. It was embarrassing and a small part of her thought that if she brought it up, he could agree with her.

So she kept it to herself and now she was crying on a public balcony of the Avengers floor, watching her husband and another girl square up to take each other to the mat.

"You ok?" Tony snuck up behind her.

Oakliehg jumped and he raised his hands in surrender. "Bucky said they have a lot of potentials, so that's good."

Tony looked her over, eyebrows pulled together. "You know he's literally been falling apart this last month, disappeared for 2 weeks looking for ya. He didn't take a mistress in that time, I doubt now that you're back there is even less of a reason for him to do that. Unless you aren't putting out. My father had a lot in common back in the day with him. They both collected women, though I suppose men still do that today."

"I didn't follow that."

"Barnes is old fashioned is what I'm trying to say."

Oakleigh pursed her lips and nodded along, though she was not exactly sure what her takeaway was. Though she felt that sickly guilt creeping back in.

"Pepper sent me to find you. Since you aren't busy you should head up to the office and give her a hand."

Looking to get away from this conversation Oakleigh nodded, dropping her cup off in the kitchen before going to change for the day.

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"I wanted to thank you again for letting me help out. Since I'm not going to school anymore you and Bruce are really helping me feel useful around here."

The blonde looked over at her, "I am happy to have the help, but given all you've been through a little break is warranted."

"I don't do well sitting idle. It makes me anxious like there is something I should be doing."

Pepper chuckled, "That must be the early 30s in you. Everyone working and when they weren't at that job they were at another, you were all hustle and bustle back then."

"Yea, that is probably where that comes from."

"I'm sure Bucky has been more than attentive, so I hope it's not a bother for me to ask. How are you doing?"

Oakleigh slid a couple of paper clips onto the files she was sorting and slid them into their perspective folders.

"Like I just woke up from that pod. or maybe I'm just coming out of the shock of being in a new century. It seems like I'm reverting to how I should have been nine months ago."

Pepper nodded. "That's not uncalled for."

"It helps to be here, even with all of Tony's technology. That is probably why Steve and Bucky like it here, it's controlled. The only ones on sight of the Avengers and people training for tactical missions. It is not so different from World War 2. It's familiar and reassuring, even though they are running into danger multiple times a month. It's not different than their hollowing commando days."

"I'm glad to hear that. If something could be done to make life better here, I hope you would let me know and allow me to get it done."

Oakleigh nodded, "I just need to learn to enjoy the quiet and let things play out the way things are going to play out."

"What do you mean by that?" Oakleigh shrugged, "Tony mentioned he's seen you watching the guys training the recruits."

"Bucky said there is a lot of potential there."

Pepper squinted at her soft tone. "I know Tony loves me, he shows me and tells me all the time. However, the way Barnes looks at you and seems to orbit around you, I have never seen love and devotion like that. I guess it may be more of an ideal from your time. But it's like watching a Disney movie anytime you both are in the same room together, I'm not sure what that poor boy would do without you, but I would venture that it would be bloody."

"I love him too. So much."

Pepper smiled, she knew the feeling. "It shows."

.

"James?"

Bucky turned his head, startled. His name rolling off Oakleigh's tongue usually caused his balls to jump and dick to throb. Because she only ever used it when they were having sex. To hear it now while they were both sitting in the common room waiting for Steve to join them for a movie night, cause worry to stir his stomach.

He slowly put down the book he was reading, his eyes raking over her face and he waited anxiously for her to continue.

"Do you ever want to go back to Wakanda?"

Wakanda had been his home for months while he was healing and for months after that until he was called up on to fight in the alien war. He loved his home there, his farm, and the peace it brought him. At one point he thought he might just hide out there for the rest of his life, he would have been happy.

Before Bucky could respond Steve walked in and Oakleigh popped up dramatically.

"Finally."

Steve rolled his eyes. "We said seven, it's six fifty-eight."

"Punctual is the new late Steve and there is still popcorn to be made."

"You could have made it."

Steve allowed Oakleigh to turn his and push him toward the kitchen, "Not that way you do it."

"I throw M&M's in it." Steve grabbed the chocolates down from the cupboard. "It's Buck's mom's recipe."

"He doesn't get the ratios right." She complained. "Besides, I know you like doing things for me, it makes you feel all good inside."

"You have a husband."

Oakleigh slid in close to Steve, "Doesn't mean you and I can't play."

Steve tried to fight the red flush that rushed to his cheeks. Even after all this time, her little comments still embarrassed him.

"I'm pretty sure that's exactly what that means."

Oakleigh scoffed and pushed away from the counter, "Spoilsport."

Bucky smirked, he had followed them into the kitchen, sliding onto one of the stools. He watched the sly smile pull across his wife's face as she turned back to Steve, once again leaning into him.

"What if Bucky joins us?" Steve gave her a disapproving look, "Watches?"

He narrowed his eyes at her, "Sticks his dick up you-"

"Popcorns done," Steve announced way louder than needed with his friends standing next to him. While he knew where Oakleigh was going, he didn't need her to say it out loud.

"So that's a no?"

Steve turned with the warm bowl in hand holding it out for her to take.

"Do you want to watch the movie or not?"

"Yes." She took the bowl. "Yes, I would."

They had settled on The Wizard of OZ. Something nice and light. After a couple of heavy missions, it was nice to turn their brains off and watch something light-hearted.

Oakleigh settled down in the middle of the couch, the boys on either side of her. She had not meant to start a conversation with Bucky that could not finish. With all the paperwork she knew Steve was buried under, she imagined he could be running at least ten, twenty minutes late.

She reached out and took Bucky's hand, once the movie was over Steve would be going back to those forms and Oakleigh could take Bucky to their room so they could talk. She was itching for a chance and with the way things had been lately Bucky seemed like he might be too.

"Hey, Buck? Would you mind helping me fill in the Casnir files?"

"You boys go. I'll clean up and meet you back at our place." Oakleigh nodded to reassure her husband she was not about to sweep her earlier question under the rug.

Bucky kissed her cheek, "I'll see you in a couple of hours."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Bucky laughed and Steve just shook his head.

After cleaning up Oakleigh made her way to her place. A warm shower was in order and it helped her sort through her thoughts. About a month after she got back from wherever Loki took her, she's been seeing the tole missions have been having on Bucky, and Steve too.

Bucky had told her many times about his time in Wakanda. Every time he spoke of his life there he got this look across his face, sombre, like he would give anything to be back there.

Oakleigh had never been to Wakanda, but he had painted such a pretty picture that she couldn't help but dream of it. Seeing herself living there with Bucky. Steve too if he wanted, thought she wasn't sure her friend would be able to step away. He had told her about the accords set up by the government years ago, back when Bucky was still under Hydras control.

How it affected the whole team and things have not been the same since then. Sure they went on missions and saved the world, but it had fractured them and it was easy to see the disappointment in his eyes every time he talked about it.

"You're still up." Bucky smiled, happy she had not fallen asleep while waiting up for him.

Oakleigh nodded, "Took a shower and read over some of the files Pepper wanted me to look at. Things take longer than expected with Steve?"

Bucky nodded, and dropped down onto the bed in front of her, "Tony stopped in and diverted things for a while. Something to do with the accords and a mission for next week. A lot of red tape. Thank you for being awake."

She chuckled, "Not like you would have let me sleep, I figured if I did drift off you would wake me when you got home."

"What's got you asking about Wakanda?"

Oakleigh bit her lip, "I know you and Steve planning to stay in the fight until Hydra could be cleaned off the map. I think after coming back, we've all realized, that's never going to happen. So, I'm wondering, given that information, is staying in this something that you still feel strongly about?"

"Until SHIELD/Hydra and Steve tracked me down, I planned to stay in Romania as long as I was undetected. I knew the language and it was safe for me there. When I was brought back in and pardoned for Hydra's crimes, Wakanda was the stability and safety I needed since joining the war efforts. Steve was the only reason I ever left. After the blip, I got thrown into the team and just stayed. Now, it's just what I do, missions and briefings, it's familiar." Bucky took a breath, studying her.

"Getting out, moving back to Wakanda or even Romania, is that something you might consider?"

Reaching out Bucky took her hands, stopping her from playing with her fingers. He kissed her knuckles softly.

"I would go anywhere with you."

Oakleigh shook her head, "I don't want you to leave it all for me. I'm asking what you want, where you see yourself and us in the next couple of years."

"I'm tired of the fight." He confessed, "I've been in it for so long, and when I came back I was happy to do it. Hoping it would make amends for everything I did. Sheri still sends me pictures of my farm, says there is still a home for me there if I ever wanted it."

"And do you, want it?"

Bucky smiled, eyes gazing into hers. He nodded, "I do."

Oakleigh smiled back, to Wakanda then. She would finally get to see all the landscapes and generous people her Husband always lit up when he talked about.

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