Summary: Missy has a past to conquer. Meanwhile Jane & Gabby attempt to bury the hatchet.


Chapter Two

Melissa splashed water on her face, gripped the sink and stared into the mirror. Looking back at her was a weary face, her blue eyes were dull and her short blonde hair was wet with sweat. She ran her hand through her hair before deviating down along her jawline and just below to touch the scar from where a .22 calibre bullet had lodged into her neck. If it hadn't been a ricochet, if it hadn't been for the help she received pressuring the wound and if it hadn't been for the paramedics being so close by, she would have died in Chicago, just another victim of gun violence. She had lost consciousness at the scene, and she had welcomed it. She thought she was going to die, and she welcomed it. Anybody in her position would have been forgiven for feeling that, because while she had been hit by a bullet ricochet, there had been a fate far worse waiting for her. It was a fate that she hadn't talked about since the interview with the police a couple days after the emergency surgery that saved her life.

Gabby showed up not long after that, with Jane in tow. It was surreal and she was so grateful that Gabby worried enough, cared enough, to come to her at a time of need. She was thankful that Jane ensured Gabby did not have to make that trek alone, although she had been quite surprised. She had thought if anyone, Maura would have been the one. Of course Jane had not been able to turn off detective mode, but she hadn't wanted to talk about it. All she discussed was how she was injured, she left out the accidental perpetrator, because she didn't want Gabby to go off half cocked. Because she knew that she had been in the tabloids. She knew that with the way the world worked, Gabby would know that she and Kelly had been romantically involved. She knew that Gabby would take any excuse to throttle Kelly.

Poor Kelly had thought she was walking in on her infidelity, but had walked in on something so much more sinister. She had fired off two rounds which missed the perpetrator, who then quickly fled. It was only then Kelly recognised the horror in front of her, first her eyes fell on the body of her teammate Talia Moore, and then she turned to see the unfortunate repercussion of her heroics. By that stage Melissa's consciousness had faded. She only knew what she had been told, and that Kelly's quick thinking had saved her life, but Melissa knew Gabby would not have seen it that way at all. Melissa knew that if Gabby knew the truth, her view would be that Kelly endangered it. If Gabby only truly knew. She hadn't even told Jane, who had Hoyt as part of her life résumé. They didn't know, and she would never tell them. They didn't need to live with what she lived with, nobody should. Staring back at her from the mirror, was the face of a woman who thought Talia Moore was the lucky one and given what Talia went through the minutes leading up to her death, that said everything.

Melissa dried her face with a towel and walked out of the bathroom. She navigated through the kitchen and into the living room, where she stopped when Charlie's ears perked and his head turned, he studied her, quickly deemed she wasn't a threat and put his head back down. She sighed, her eyes flicking to the television, which was turned down low with some 1980s karate movie playing. She grabbed a blanket from the hall cupboard and returned to place it over Gabby's sleeping form. She was so peaceful like that. Melissa hoped her dreams took her back in time to when they were young and her countless mistakes hadn't doomed them to this misery they now lived in. She switched off the television and navigated down the hall to the master bedroom, where she tucked back into bed and switched off the bedside lamp.

Melissa struggled with sleep most nights, even more so on nights where the true cost of the damage she was inflicting on Gabby was so painstakingly obvious. Gabby didn't want to leave her, she was so clearly stuck blaming herself for what had happened, and that broke Melissa's heart. She hadn't been the same since she returned home to the relative safety of Launceston and Gabby's home. Her view on sex and love had shifted, and that was because she knew she was using sex to forget. She didn't want to fall back into the bottle, and Gabby couldn't keep up with her needs, not that she hadn't valiantly tried, but the hardest times were when she was alone. When Gabby was working. All she had was the silence and her memory of every little thing that took place that night.

Melissa shuddered just thinking about it, goosebumps prickled her skin and she could already feel her heart rate beginning to increase. She rolled over to face a side of the bed that hadn't been slept in and she fell further into the abyss of her mind. She couldn't really blame Gabby for preferring to fall asleep on the couch, not given the way she had been in recent months. She just wished Gabby would come to bed and hold her at night, but she didn't dare ask. She didn't deserve that.

She reached blindly over to the nightstand and found her phone. She quickly unlocked it and scrolled through her messages, her heart clenching when she reached her history with Kelly. She opened the thread and she swiped the phone repeatedly to scroll past the recent messages she had left unanswered, and she found the ones from that fateful night. The way Kelly had so calmly called her out on her infidelity and announced she was coming over to sort it out once and for all. She closed her eyes as tears spilled down her cheeks. The things she was doing to Gabby, with her permission, had nothing on what she had done to Kelly.

The universe had a wicked sense of humour, Melissa was soon to realise, as before she could close the phone a new message arrived from Kelly. Her heart skipped a beat, and she brought the phone to her forehead and just held it there, as if that act could make any real difference to the hesitation and heartache she felt. She had made a promise to Gabby at the hospital all those months ago, to leave Kelly in the past. She had been trying so hard to leave her in the past, but without her, she wouldn't be alive. She'd be dead. But it was more than that and she knew it.

It was everything that had happened in the two years leading up to that moment, it was the entire life they had lived after she had left Gabby behind. It was the relationship she had fallen into, it was the relationship she had tried to escape in the most emotionally unhealthy ways, ways that now infected the one relationship she wanted to be in. She had been wielding meaningless sex as a weapon for far longer than the last couple of months. She had used it against Kelly too, because Kelly had broken her word. Kelly had promised not to fall for her. She had promised that it was just two consenting adults having a good time, a friend helping another forget the pain of the life she had left behind in pursuit of a dream. Kelly had fallen in love, and Melissa had let it simmer for far too long, because one day she looked at Kelly and pictured a real future with her and that moment in time changed everything.

"Fuck," she growled, she didn't even read the message, instead she just called. "Hey," she offered with no other words to convey why after six months she had finally responded.

"Missy?" Kelly's voice sounded disbelieving.

"Yeah, it's me. You need to stop texting me." It wasn't what she really meant to say, but Gabby was barely clinging to her sanity as it was. This conversation, if Gabby knew about it, would likely start a fight, and it wouldn't be one she could end with a simple touch and a kiss like she had at dinner time. It would hurt Gabby exponentially. She really didn't want to hurt her as often as she did. She knew she hurt her more than any woman who claimed to love another ever should.

"I missed you," it was as if Kelly hadn't even heard what had been said.

Several moments of silence after this was all that was needed to express words that Melissa would never say. Words that she hoped at least, she would never say. She really didn't trust herself anymore, she was pretty sure her response to trauma was to simultaneously cling to and push away the love of her life with equal force.

"I know you miss me too." Kelly just had to air it, she was desperate.

"I don't. You need to stop." Melissa's voice was cold, all the while her heart clenched at her lies. She was doomed, she was sure of it. She was going to spend eternity being burnt alive over and over again in the depths of Hell.

"Tell me you don't love me, and I'll stop."

"I fucked Talia." Melissa knew this wasn't news, but a nice hearty reminder of the infidelity she had committed was definitely due at that moment. It didn't escape either of them that she was deflecting.

"And Dawn, and Indi, don't act like I don't already know that. You made sure I knew and Christ it hurt me Missy, but it didn't take me long to realise why you were doing it. You were doing it because you were scared. You hoped to push me away so you didn't have to face that you had real feelings. That you loved me." Kelly's voice was low, calm, calculated.

"Or I did it because I'm just an arsehole." Melissa sighed, she hated how easily Kelly saw through the barriers she put up. It didn't change anything though, because whatever love she thought she may have been starting to feel, it all changed that night in Chicago and the clarity of death couldn't be ignored. Gabby was her everything, so any other feelings for anyone else were simply irrelevant. "Just please let it go."

For the longest time there was silence until Kelly finally said, "I held you in my arms, your blood coating my hands. I won't let it go."

Melissa was at her wits end. Her heart ached, and she missed Gabby and she hated that she had ever gotten so emotionally close to someone else in the first place. Kelly was different to Jane, Kelly was obtainable and she had been with her for eighteen months before stepping out on her in an attempt to punish them both. Because that's what it really was, punishment. She hated that even to this day, she inexplicably still felt that yearning, and connection with Kelly. So she used the only thing she had to shut the conversation down. "You fucking shot me."

Kelly ignored it. She couldn't argue the literal facts. "I'm not giving up on us. I love you Missy, and I know you still love me. You'd have ended the call and blocked my number by now if you didn't."

Melissa ended the call. She couldn't allow herself to fall into thinking about the past, because thinking about that night or Kelly led her to searching out another woman to bed to ease the pain. It was a sick twisted place she had reached, but truly what else was she to do? Drink herself into a stupor? Would that be easier for Gabby to live with? Maybe the right thing for Gabby would be to break her heart once and for all, but Melissa didn't want to die, no matter how often she would wish she had. She was alive. She had survived. She wanted to live, and losing Gabby would kill her. She was sure of it.

Charlie bounded into the room and jumped up onto the bed, which sent a wave of panic shooting right through Melissa. She sat up and looked over at the doorway, it was hard to see but Gabby was standing there arms crossed, the look on her face was indiscernible in the shadow of night. "How long were you standing there?"

"Who were you talking to?" Gabby asked coldly, suspecting she knew, which left her with a chilling realisation.

"Just come to bed babe, please?" She felt Charlie crawl up beside her with one of his stealth affection attacks, and she automatically started petting him, all the while terrified that Gabby had overheard her comment about being shot.

Gabby just stared at her dog and muttered, "Traitor." It was easier than digesting all her feelings, because she was looking at her girlfriend thinking that she had been talking to Kelly, which meant Kelly had been the one to nearly kill the love of her life. The same woman Melissa had been parading around with publicly when she had been in Chicago. The same woman she knew her girlfriend had bedded multiple times in the past. The reason she had so many rules that really didn't apply, just in case Kelly dared show her face in Launceston. She patted her leg, "Here boy."

Charlie lifted his head and looked over at Gabby but put his head back down on his paws, where he had gotten comfortable lying next to Melissa. Melissa saw the heartbreak in Gabby's eyes, a lot of it must have been that she knew it was Kelly that had shot her, and worse thought that she was still communicating with her on a regular basis. She leaned over to Charlie's ear and whispered, "Go to Mum, go on."

Charlie whined a little but did as he was told, jumping off the bed and nuzzling Gabby's hand, which stayed by her side, while she continued to just stare at Melissa. Finally she simply nodded, her mind settling on something she could control. "No exes. No feelings. No more than once and for Christ's sake, stop fucking them in my bed."

There were more rules than that, the first three she had kept quite well. Melissa had failed at the latter, and she knew it was because she was being self destructive. She kept pushing Gabby further away every single day, despite her desperate need to cling to her, to rekindle their love, which had been tainted significantly in the last two and a half years. She felt safe with Gabby, she felt safe in Gabby's home, and she realised, all those justifications, were only making things worse for the both of them. She had to do better. She had to be better. Gabby deserved the world, and she was dragging her down into Hell with her. It simply wasn't good enough.


Jane approached the second day of her partnership with Gabby with a little more positivity and a determination to bury the hatchet with her Sergeant. It helped that Maura had provided her with a rather enthusiastic, private, work out session before breakfast. Her entire body still tingled at the thought of the things that Maura could do with her hands and her mouth.

One look at the smirk on Jane's face told Gabby a lot more than she imagined Jane would want her to know. She debated if she wanted to make a comment, unsure if Jane was ready for that kind of banter. She couldn't resist a little remark, "Looks like you had a good morning, Constable."

Any other day, Jane may have bitten. She may have let her hackles rise and taken the bait, but the reality was Gabby was not a threat, just as she was not a threat to Gabby's relationship. That was just a threat to itself. She was tired of the wasted energy that came with intensely disliking Gabby. "Yes Sergeant, it was a fantastic morning." She waggled her eyebrows for extra emphasis.

Gabby stuffed her coat into her locker, almost missing the eyebrow waggle that signalled the thawing of their icy rivalry, if she chose to accept that. Closing her locker she returned her gaze to Jane who was just re-lacing her shoe, using her locker as support. When her patrol partner dropped her foot back to the ground, Gabby turned her body and stuck out her hand. "I don't have the energy to fight wars on every front, Rizzoli. Truce?"

Jane gripped the hand offered and shook firmly. It was more than just compassion, more than just respect and more than just doing what Maura had asked of her. It was necessary. They had to rely on one another in the field, and while Launceston was most definitely not a hotbed of crime, it would be dangerous to be complacent. It would be dangerous to be at war with her Sergeant. "I am not saying I wanna start hanging out all the time, Wilson, but this'll work."

Gabby clapped Jane on the back and headed for the exit, "Foot patrol in the CBD this morning, let's go."

Jane let out a disappointed groan before using her long legs to chase after and catch up with Gabby. It was a lot nicer when they had a car, and it had only been one day. The most excitement from the day before had been Gabby's mini panic attack. Sitting in the car, relaxing, doing very little while Gabby drove? That was what Jane called a nice easy way to do her time back on patrol. This whole foot patrol thing around the central business district, was a whole other kettle of fish. "Wait, don't you make the assignments Wilson?" Jane asked, trying out a more familiar term, which she figured she was free to do now that they had thawed their ice.

Gabby nodded. "Yup, but you really think I am not going to give you a full tour of Launceston policing?"

Jane chuckled a little and shook her head. "Of course not."

They walked out of the precinct into Civic Square, a paved public space that housed public seating, a water installation and sculptures of eagles as well as some greenery and the odd coffee van or food truck. The Launceston Library was housed directly opposite the back entrance into the precinct and the precinct itself was right next to City Hall. They hung a left to hit the traffic lights next to City Hall on St John Street. Across the intersection on the corner of St John and Cameron Streets was the Launceston Post Office building, which combined Queen Anne and Romanesque architectural design when built in 1891, a clock tower was added to the building in 1903, the clock itself not being erected until 1910. The clock was still in operation, and was in the midst of its individual bell calls tolling to signify the hour, which was nine a.m. sharp.

Jane could appreciate the historical architecture, mixed in with more modern designs as they walked. It was different walking the streets in uniform, she realised. She was actually taking her time to look at her surroundings, instead of just treating the place as a means to an end. Agreeing to stay in what she could only feel was a sleepy village in comparison to the bustling metropolis that was Boston hadn't been an easy adjustment, but now she was in the thick of it and she was appreciating the history. There may have been a good two hundred and twenty years difference in the original settlements of Boston and Launceston, but there was still historical significance to be found. "Oh for the love of God," Jane muttered, "I have been spending too much time with Maura."

Gabby glanced sideways and smiled with bemusement at the look of faux annoyance on Jane's face. "Why on earth would you say that?"

"I'm walking around, looking, appreciating historical significance. Wilson, I should be thinking about baseball, or football or…"

"Pfft," Gabby spat out an incredulous sound, "that rubbish you guys call football is not football. Pads and helmets? Remind me to take you to a real football game next year." It had slipped out so easily and in that moment, she realised, she might actually like being an actual friend to Jane Rizzoli, assuming of course her reaction was acceptable. Any attempt to label Gridiron as anything less than inferior to Australian Rules would not be appreciated one little bit.

Jane smirked, realising that Gabby's offer was both genuine and her banter an attempt to needle. She liked it. She also liked Australian football, it was skillful, but also incredibly violent at times. The bumps players gave out and took just to get up and keep going like nothing had happened, yeah, it was a tough sport and it was played by tough people.

Melissa had made sure to educate her on that when she had called September of 2013 to make sure Jane was going to watch the AFL Grand Final. Because she couldn't and somebody had to watch her team win for the first time in five years. They did, and then not that long ago they had done it again and gone back to back as premiers. Jane of course wasn't sure she wanted to mention the education Melissa had given her, given that any mention of Melissa might send Gabby into a downward spiral. So she simply shrugged, "Are your Unsociable Hawks going to win three in a row?"

"Unsociable, bah!" Gabby scoffed, "Don't buy into the media rubbish. Hawks play hard and fair, and they hate us cause they ain't us."

As a New England patriots and Tom Brady fan, Jane knew exactly how that felt and realised Maura may have been right. If she gave it a chance she might just find she had plenty in common with Gabby. "I admit that Aussie Rules is a surprisingly elegant game wrapped around some seriously vicious hits."

Gabby grinned. Vicious was an understatement sometimes. "We might make a real Aussie out of you yet, Rizzoli!"

Jane rolled her eyes. She had the paperwork, as far as the country she lived in was concerned, she was legit now, but she would always be Bostonian at heart. "Yeah, yeah," she reluctantly agreed.

They hung a right at the George street intersection and started walking down towards Brisbane Street. As they passed the Prickly Cactus, Gabby couldn't help but remember the moment she had decided was a pivotal point in her history. The night Maura had first admitted love for her, but had also gotten the call from Frost that Jane had not had the nicest run in with Hoyt. She shuddered still thinking about the fear etched on Maura's face, at the thought of Jane giving up. She paused and turned to look at Jane with admiration, who returned her look with a raised eyebrow signifying curiosity. Gabby shook it off. "Forget it."

Jane kept pace with Gabby as she started moving again, but she wouldn't have become Boston Homicide's youngest detective without having natural curiosity to dig out the truth. "Come on, it's bonding time, don't you know?" She tried to keep the mood light.

"Not sure you want me to talk about memories from when I was dating your fiancée." Gabby wanted to deflect, not near ready to admit admiration for the way Jane had turned her life around. Baby steps were required.

Jane took a moment to force her brain to recondition its reaction to history that really was ancient now. Satisfied she had found her calm place she said, "I think the only way we truly move forward beyond our innate negative reactions is to normalise our pasts. Do I like that you dated Maura? Hell no, but the honest facts are, you didn't know me, and I sure as hell wasn't in the picture yet. You made her happy at a time when she really needed that, Wilson. I think that's what I most appreciate and loathe at the same time, because it should have been me all along."

Gabby considered what Jane had said in silence for a little while as they walked past a bar, dry cleaners and a shoe shop before turning the corner onto Brisbane Street and looping back towards St John Street. Finally she said, "I'll never regret that relationship, Rizzoli. I regret some of my actions during it, but never the relationship itself. It gave me a chance to really get to know Maura, and honestly I wouldn't have survived these last six months without her friendship. I consider her to be my best friend, and I don't say that lightly."

Jane smiled. A quick glance at the sincerity in Gabby's eyes had clicked the one thing that hadn't ever quite clicked into place the last two and a half years. Maura had someone Jane could trust to keep her safe and put her best interests first at times she may not be able to. Gabby wasn't a threat, she was a security blanket. She actually found she was breathing easier, although the depth of feelings being shared were bordering on uncomfortable, she knew it was just another piece of the work she had been doing for years, even after ceasing therapy. "So, what were you thinking about?"

"The look on her face when Detective Frost called her and told her you had given up. I realised I admired your grit and tenacity to come back from all of that mess." Gabby answered feeling hesitant to pump up Jane's ego with a compliment, but they were making progress and building trust, it was important.

The compliment hit a little more significantly given that Jane recognised the depths that Gabby was slowly descending down to. She felt like her Sergeant was barely hanging on, and damn if Gabby wasn't Maura's best friend too. Sure she herself was the best friend, but she was also Maura's everything, and Gabby was the new best friend that gave her life balance. She really hoped she could be that extra helping hand to lift Gabby out of the muck and mire of her life. As in really, genuinely hoped. Not just in a lip service, keep the fiancée happy, kind of way.

Jane sighed and focused more on the pedestrians going about their daily business. They had passed the entrance to the Brisbane Street Arcade and a men's clothing store, and she could now smell coffee and pastries from the bakeries ahead on the street. Her stomach growled, she had only managed to grab an apple on her way out, as her morning intimacy with Maura had left her running late to get out of the house.

She was about to suggest food when her mobile phone rang. She reached into her pocket and looked at the Caller ID, it was Kelly. Her face scrunched up in confusion, she hadn't heard from Kelly since Melissa had returned home. She figured it was because Kelly and Gabby had butted heads right in front of her in the hallway outside of Melissa's room at the hospital in Chicago. Jane had sided with Gabby that day, and that had effectively ended her friendship with Kelly, who had looked so incredibly hurt.

"Well I know it ain't Maura calling based on the look on your face. Do you need to take that?" Gabby was showing more patience than she would have shown with any other rookie.

Jane diverted the call to voicemail and pocketed her phone. "Nope. I do, however, want to inspect the inside of this bakery for crime and hijinx." Jane said, gesturing towards Baker's Dozen.

"Oh yes," Gabby pulled out her notepad from her front pocket and sifted through her notes, "I have reports of a missing apricot danish and black coffee, two sugars." Gabby responded cheekily, "You should definitely investigate."

Jane rolled her eyes, recognising that as the rookie she was paying. Some things really didn't change, no matter the setting, or culture. "One coffee and an apricot danish coming right up, my treat."

"Two sugars, Rizzoli." Gabby repeated with a smirk as she watched her patrol partner duck into the bakery.

Jane returned a few minutes later with the coffee and danish for Gabby and a blueberry muffin for herself. They then resumed walking, crossing St John Street they entered the Brisbane Street Mall, which effectively was one block long and broke Brisbane Street into two separate streets, as only the police or event organisers were allowed to drive across the tiled space. Stores lined each side of the Mall, and there was plenty of public seating and some sculptures of Thylacines, an extinct marsupial mammal more commonly referred to as the Tasmanian Tiger.

They stopped to help a couple of Japanese tourists with directions to the Cataract Gorge and kept on their way. Eventually Gabby shocked Jane with some information straight out of left field. "Pretty sure it was Kelly that shot Missy. Overheard them on the phone last night."

Suddenly the phone call from Kelly felt a lot more suspicious. Jane knew she had better follow up on that later, but definitely not at that moment, not while Gabby was trying to process the information. She had suspected as much just on the information she had gathered while doing her inevitable investigating at the time, at least what she could get away with before Chicago PD shut her down. Jane was grateful Kelly was somewhere stateside, because one look at Gabby's eyes left her worried for Kelly's well-being if those two ever crossed paths. She felt it safer to lead with the second piece of information. "She was talking to Kelly?"

"Sounded like she was telling her to stop bothering her, but I dunno Rizzoli. She didn't need to call her for that. She could have just blocked her number." Gabby informed, her despondence crystal clear in the way her face fell and her eyes dimmed.

Jane was inclined to believe that Melissa was genuinely trying to put distance between her and Kelly, but then again two months ago she wouldn't have necessarily believed Melissa capable of making Gabby live through an apparently one sided, active, open relationship. The moment Maura had mentioned it in concern, Jane just couldn't wrap her brain around it. That wasn't the Melissa she knew and cared about. It felt fruitless to suggest Gabby give her the benefit of the doubt, because the more she thought about it the more she worried Melissa was just finding brand new ways to break the open relationships rules of engagement. Rules that she really had no business being privy to, but Maura being Maura had explained them in very great detail. As far as open relationships went the rules sounded reasonable, the problem was that only one person was actively engaged in the behaviour. That was bad juju.

In the end Jane just shrugged. She was too close to Melissa, and as concerned as she was, there was no safe answer, not really. "I don't know what to say."

"Quite fitting really. I don't know what to feel."


A/N: Hey guys, how do you feel about the summary moving forward? Just something I am trying out. This is moving a little slower, not from writer's block, just been living my life a little and dealing with some things. Only half a chapter ahead, but wanted to get something out as its been a few days. Thanks to all who read and review and follow and favourite and just all of it, I appreciate you.