Chapter Ten

Friday mornings were meant to be peaceful relaxing mornings for Maura. She only had an afternoon class to teach at the university and it afforded her flexibility to catch up on her reading or partake in a longer yoga session. That wasn't the case this particular morning. Not only had she been awoken an hour early by Jane yelling, but the subsequent conversation had left her feeling unsettled. It was the first time in years that there was anything even close to contention between the two of them, and it didn't feel good.

On top of that she was worried about Gabby, who had not yet responded to her text or phone message enquiring after her wellbeing. She was frustrated with herself for having caved by allowing Kelly to stay with them in the first place. Her best friend was hurting because of Kelly's actions and that was just not acceptable. She had warned Jane that would happen, and now there was a mess to be cleaned up and her crankiness at having been woken early had definitely impacted her thought process. She had appeared cold and heartless in the early hours and she couldn't shake how heartbroken Jane had looked when she had told her she was going to help Melissa deal with the fallout. She had caused that look on her beloved's face. That bothered her deeply.

Over a cup of coffee that Maura desperately needed to help her reach peak alertness she started thinking about the situation in depth and what she needed to do to help both Gabby and Melissa. If Jane didn't care so much for the latter, she wouldn't have put so much thought into her, because while she had been entirely too cold and blunt about it that morning, she still believed what she had said. Gabby would be better off, but then she recognised Jane wasn't wrong either, it was highly unlikely Gabby would be able to see it the way she did, and her friend would be hurting for a long time.

Maura sighed. She had let personal feelings cloud her judgement. She didn't like Melissa. There had been a time when she thought she could, but her behaviour in Chicago had taken such a huge toll on Gabby that once Melissa returned an apparently completely different person, she just couldn't do it. The incredibly fast and strong connection Jane had built with Melissa in the past in no way affected her feelings on the woman. At least that's what Maura told herself anyway.

After she finished her coffee and washed the cup out Maura was ready to approach the day, reinvigorated by her plan. The first order of business involved an executive decision, but one she didn't think Jane would be too unhappy with. Not given the way she had exploded that morning.

Maura knocked on the guest room door, then folded her hands in front of her body and waited. When Kelly opened the door she spoke softly, but firmly. "I'm sorry Kelly, but I have to ask you to leave. While I understand your position, I do not respect or appreciate the way you have approached the situation. As a result of your actions my home must remain a safe place for Gabby."

Kelly already had her bags packed, because she wasn't an idiot. Whether it was Maura or Jane, one of them was going to throw her out. She had caused great emotional harm to two people they both cared about with her carelessness. She understood entirely that their home would need to be a safe space for at least one of them. She nodded and smiled awkwardly while attempting to apologise. "I get it. I let my emotions get the better of me, and for that I am sorry. This was not how I wanted things to play out."

Maura pursed her lips and studied Kelly closely. She wasn't buying the apology for one moment. The woman standing in front of her was too intelligent to have not known what she was doing, but clearly not intelligent enough to recognise that she couldn't win Melissa's heart by taking Gabby away from her. "I'm sure it isn't. You failed to take into consideration that Melissa will blame you for this."

"You know, you're right." Kelly agreed, but kept her innermost thoughts to herself. Because looking at Maura in that moment she couldn't help but see a very calculated, coldhearted woman, and she pitied Jane for it. "But tell me this Maura… what are you going to do now that Jane has gone all in on saving Missy?"

On the surface it sounded like a genuine question, but Maura could see the accusation in Kelly's eyes. "I'm sorry, what are you implying?"

"Well," Kelly said, shifting her weight around a little, "It seems to me that when someone you care about is worried about Missy you like to lock her away in the nuthouse."

Maura's eyes went wide. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. It was bad enough hearing that kind of accusation from Jane three years ago when it was decidedly untrue, let alone from someone who wasn't privy to all the details. "I don't know what you think you know, but I have only ever had the best intentions regarding Melissa's mental health."

Kelly tilted her head a little and smiled devilishly. "Is that what you told yourself when you planned your arrival in Boston to profess your love for Jane to coincide with Missy's return flight? Do you even realise how devious that was? Where was your care for Missy's mental health then?"

Maura opened her mouth to defend herself but quickly closed it. She recognised from the outside looking in, it would look exactly as had been described. With a shake of her head she said, "I did not think for a second that Jane would still reciprocate feelings. I believed her to be genuinely in love with Melissa."

Kelly resisted the temptation to throw her head back and laugh. If that's what Maura truly believed she was naive. "Jane was always in love with you and you know it. Consciously or not, you took something from Missy that day and she's never recovered."

"What on earth are you rambling about?" Maura was confused, she didn't understand how she could have taken anything from Melissa. Jane had chosen Melissa and Melissa had been the one to walk away from that relationship. Her declaration had been moot.

Kelly realised that she was sitting on a theory that could be very destabilising for Jane and Maura's relationship if Maura was at all insecure. She was very much in a fighting mood and while she knew she was about to burn every bridge she had left, she wanted to light a fire under Maura for the hurt she had caused Melissa in the past. "Missy knew about your declaration before she ended her relationship with Jane, right?"

Maura nodded, they had addressed it between themselves on Australia Day in 2012. "What does this have to do with any of your ramblings?"

Kelly nodded knowingly, Melissa had told her as much during one of their long chats the first month she was in Chicago. There had been a distant look in Melissa's eyes that night, like she was right back there feeling everything she had felt. Kelly's theory had been forming since that night and it certainly didn't make her life any easier knowing it. So she decided to drop her second bomb of the morning. After all, why burn a bridge when you could obliterate it?

"Gabby's not the one Missy misses most. That would be Jane. It's why she left in the first place I suspect." Kelly could see Maura's mind working in overdrive trying to find evidence to the contrary. "She was petrified that Jane didn't love her, so she fell back on what was safe. She returned to Gabby, and ever since then she hasn't been the same. Hell, she even ran from that relationship the first opportunity she got."

"Hold on a minute," Maura was ready to refute, "I know for a fact she made many attempts to reconcile with Gabby."

"Of course she did. She repeated it like a mantra, that Gabby was the love of her life. She brainwashed herself so that she wouldn't have to feel the real heartache of losing Jane."

"This is an asinine theory, Kelly."

"Tell me something Maura. Since being home in Launceston, has Missy spent much time with Jane?"

"No, not really." Maura answered, unsure why she was continuing to entertain Kelly's outlandish theory.

"Have you ever wondered why that is? Jane of all people could truly comprehend what it was like looking into the face of evil. The same Jane that she instantly bonded with when they first met and yet not only have they hardly spoken, I suspect she actively pushed Jane away, right?" Kelly was on a roll, she was buying her own hype game.

"To be fair, Melissa has alienated everyone in her life at this point." Maura really didn't see the relevance.

Kelly rubbed her temples, a little surprised that Maura wasn't able to put it together. "She didn't want to face Jane, because she knew it would bring it all back. I'd keep a close eye on Jane with her whole saviour martyr thing she has going on because Missy's out of options now. She's going to be confronted very quickly with a reminder of her feelings for Jane and she's got nobody left. That woman doesn't like to be alone, Maura."

At this point Maura didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Kelly's theory was so ridiculous that it almost had merit. It was the almost of it all that gnawed at her insides. Even Maura Isles was capable of insecurity, especially when it came to Jane, because she wasn't a fool. She knew that fast, strong connections like Jane and Melissa shared didn't come along every day.

The plans Maura had made that morning went out the window at that moment. "You're a viable option for Melissa, are you not?"

Kelly's eyebrows shot up in surprise. That was not the response she had been expecting. She had half expected to be slapped and thrown out on her ass. Maura's question was an interesting development. "I might have been," she confirmed, "Before my spiteful overshare with Gabby earlier. You weren't wrong about that Maura, Missy will blame me."

That could be a problem, Maura decided, as she didn't want to risk letting Jane play protector if Kelly's theory was even close to accurate. It was ridiculous to be worrying about, she knew that, but she couldn't help it. Jane had always chosen Melissa when given an actual choice, could it happen again? She knew she wasn't giving her fiancée enough credit. Jane wouldn't have stayed with her in Launceston at all if she didn't want to be there with her, but doubt had the ability to creep up unexpectedly out of the blue. "We should discuss this further. I need all the details if I am to assist you."

Kelly wasn't sure there was much Maura could do to assist her, other than perhaps making sure Gabby's decision remained final and that Jane gave her room to breathe. "It sure would help if Jane was back on my side, or at least not actively trying to keep me away from Missy, which I suspect she might be inclined to do at the moment."

"Let's talk first," Maura motioned for Kelly to follow her and led her into the dining room. Once Kelly was seated she said, "Did you want anything to drink, or eat?"

Kelly shook her head in the negative. "I honestly couldn't eat right now if I wanted to. Ask your questions, I'll answer honestly."

Maura sat in the seat across the table from Kelly and studied her closely. She still wasn't sure she could trust the woman and she wasn't completely heartless, she wanted to at least feel like Kelly's treatment of Melissa would be genuine. She was walking a dangerously fine line between self service and helping two people find some sense of happiness together. Her own conscience needed it to be legitimate, if it wasn't, she might just have to find out the hard way how true Kelly's theory was.

"I honestly don't know where to begin."

Kelly sighed softly. She was mentally exhausted, and her heart ached. She had been on the defensive for so long, it was hard to process Maura's change in attitude. Logically she knew it was because she had put the fear of God into her regarding Jane and Melissa, and she kind of regretted that. She didn't regret getting Maura on side, but she regretted the uncertainty it had clearly created. The problem was, she happened to believe her own theory.

Upon reflection she felt Melissa had actually self destructed their relationship, because the last time she had given her heart to someone they were going to break it one little piece at a time. She was scared. She wasn't scared that she was falling for someone other than Gabby, she was just scared. Because of Jane. Gabby was her safe space, because Gabby's love for her, while not always perfect over the years, had been consistent whenever there were times of need. So it made sense to Kelly that Gabby was Melissa's safe space; a safe space she had inadvertently ripped away.

"You want to know if I truly love Missy, and honestly I can't blame you for being uncertain." Kelly spoke quietly, "I've been acting like a petulant child who had their favourite toy taken away. Gabby really does bring that out in me, and I don't know why."

Even Maura had to admit that actually made sense. Gabby had a way of bringing the worst out in people, she was very antagonistic when she felt threatened, or thought that someone was hurting someone she loved. It wasn't the healthiest of traits, but it was a part of what made up her dearest friend. "I suspect that's just because it's what Gabby does. She could antagonise a pacifist into violence, if she wanted to."

"There's definitely some of that, but I think in all honesty it's frustration with Missy for settling instead of taking a chance on what we had been building."

"If you believe Missy has been settling for Gabby because she's her safe space, then you need to replicate what Gabby has provided all these years. You have to be consistent and present. She needs to feel like your love isn't going anywhere."

Kelly nodded her agreement. It was one of the reasons she decided to get on the plane in the first place. She had to be present. "That's why I'm here, Maura. I wasn't expecting this to be easy. I expected I would need to stay. That's why I wanted to stay here when I first arrived, to make sure I wanted this. I knew that if you and Jane could talk me out of upsetting the status quo, then I shouldn't be making any declaration of love. I didn't expect to come face to face with Gabby. I didn't expect to sabotage myself in the worst of ways."

"Actually, I think you've faced your litmus test. You stood your ground, and even went on the attack. Sitting here right now, do you want it?" Maura was starting to warm to Kelly, just enough to recognise she was a woman with the best of intentions who fell victim to the unexpected. By no means did it justify her actions, it just made them more relatable.

Kelly mulled over what Maura had to say. She had certainly been under fire from the moment she arrived, and it had brought out the worst in her, but she realised that she had indeed been up for the fight. She was ready to burn the world down if it meant she had her chance with Melissa, and while it was clearly the wrong way to go about it, it was the answer she had been seeking. "Yeah. I do."

Maura nodded thoughtfully, she was about to reply when she was distracted by the audio notification of a new text message on her phone. "One moment," she said, as she pulled her phone out to check in the hopes it was Jane or Gabby with an update on their situations. The message was from Jane.

Had to call out of work. Missy's not doing well. Can you drop me a change of clothes on your way to work?

Maura stared at her phone for several moments while attempting to formulate a reply. While she logically knew the likelihood of Jane calling out of work was high the moment she left the house that morning, being confronted by it with Kelly's theory at the forefront of her mind just made her very uncomfortable. Add to that the request for a change of clothes and her mind was ready to run wild with theories and assumptions of her own. Was Jane intending on not coming home that night?

Maura would have called Jane to get her answers but she knew that it might only inflame the situation. So she settled for a logical question returned via text.

Are you sure it is wise to miss work your first week of employment?

While waiting for the inevitable reply Maura looked back over at Kelly and explained, "Jane's called out of work."

Maura's eyes diverted with the latest text notification.

What other choice do I have Maura? She can't be left alone right now.

Maura was quick to tap out her reply.

If you think she's a danger to herself, you know what you need to do.

Maura glanced up at Kelly who was watching her text conversation with an apprehensive look on her face. She understood the inclination, although she imagined their shared apprehension was for differing reasons.

Kelly ran a hand through her hair anxiously. The one thing that she and Maura could definitely agree on, was that neither of them wanted Jane and Melissa spending too much time together. She didn't think Jane would cheat on Maura, but she did worry that Melissa would refocus her affections on Jane, which Kelly didn't think she could compete with. It had been hard enough competing with the memory of Gabby back in Chicago.

No Maura. We are not doing that to her again. She just needs a friend. So leave it alone would you? I'll talk to you when you get here.

Maura frowned, she felt thoroughly dismissed by Jane. She looked back up at Kelly and said, "I think it's time that you and Melissa had a conversation. In person."

Kelly agreed with Maura's assessment, but knew it wouldn't be easy. The idea was fraught with danger. There was potential for not just one, but two emotional showdowns. Resigned to her fate, Kelly muttered, "And so it begins."


After eventually helping Melissa out of the shower and her soaking wet clothes and into a dry set, all while managing to allow Melissa her modesty, Jane helped her friend into bed. She herself had changed into a black pair of Gabby's sweatpants and a faded Van Halen t-shirt. She had tossed the wet clothes in the wash, and texted Maura. That conversation had gone as well as she had expected, and it had only served to irritate her. She used the energy from her irritation to help Melissa by taking on the monumental task of packing up her music collection.

Jane had found a couple of empty boxes in the hall cupboard, but she knew she would need more. That would be something she would figure out later. She went into Gabby's old study to get started and was immediately hit with memories. The framed Reba McEntire and Melissa Etheridge posters up on the wall reminded her of the first time she had woken up alone in Melissa's bedroom three years prior. An entire wall of CDs and Vinyl had only multiplied in that time. Jane was pretty sure her own music collection had dwindled in the same time span.

Jane started pulling CD's down from the shelves and packing them away carefully, ensuring not to mess with the alphabetic order. She wanted an already stressful situation to be as smooth as possible when Melissa unpacked. Jane supposed they would go back up on the same wall they had come down from, as Melissa hadn't sold her home. Simply left it as it was for the most part. At least it made it easier for them to get Melissa moved back in, as she had only brought her music, clothes and photo albums when she had moved in with Gabby. She hadn't even brought her softball equipment and memorabilia.

After she finished packing up the first box, Jane taped it up and wrote music: box one in black marker on the top of the box. She moved it over near the door and turned back to look at the room, and this time she was taken back to the night she had accompanied Maura in a rescue attempt. Jane shuddered. She had entered the room just as Melissa had pulled the trigger and collapsed into Maura's arms from shock, or defeat, she wasn't sure which. She thanked God for the safety being left on.

Jane closed her eyes and remembered so clearly picking Melissa up and cradling her in her arms while carrying her to the car. In some ways that was their first intimate moment, but at the time she had no idea how close they would soon become. Jane opened her eyes and scratched at the scar on her right palm, her chest tightening a little under the strain of the difficult emotions inundating her senses. Feeling overwhelmed Jane quietly made her way to the master bedroom to confirm Melissa was still sleeping and then stepped outside to get some fresh air.

She walked the front path and stopped to look at the garden and remembered the conversation she had shared with Melissa the day before she was committed to St Luke's. They had spoken so openly, and she had felt so seen for the first time in a long time. They had felt safe with one another that day.

Jane rubbed her face with her hand and sucked in the fresh air, eventually having to wipe tears from her face. It was the first time she was truly revisiting pivotal moments in her friendship with Melissa since their relationship ended. It amazed her as she stood there how little she had actually talked about it in therapy or even with Maura. She had only really talked about and processed the way their relationship had just ceased to exist without an actual word, not everything that went into building it in the first place.

"Well damn," Jane muttered to herself, realising that she had never actually truly grieved the end of the relationship. There had been one slow dance at Brad and Monica's wedding that she thought was her letting go. Maura had even suggested it was much needed closure. Jane wasn't so sure her heart had ever bothered to process that. She had bounced from one overwhelming situation to another and her therapy had focused on the Hoyt of it all, the drinking and learning how to better communicate with Maura.

The sound of footsteps broke Jane from her reverie and she looked up to see Maura, holding an overnight bag over her shoulder. She quickly wiped her face with her hand once again to erase any tears before offering up half a smile. "Hey."

Maura dropped the bag at her feet and immediately bridged the distance between them. Her hand went immediately to Jane's face where she wiped a stray tear with her thumb. "Are you alright Jane?"

Jane turned into the hand and kissed it softly before taking it into her own hand and drawing it back down between their bodies. She nodded slowly. "Just took an uncomfortable trip down memory lane packing up Missy's music room."

Maura's face scrunched up in confusion.

"Formerly Gabby's study."

Recognition lit up Maura's eyes and she squeezed Jane's hand gently. That had most certainly been a difficult night and it only made sense that those memories would come flooding back during an emotionally difficult time. "How is Melissa doing?"

"She's asleep right now. Thanks for bringing those," Jane answered, pointing over at the bag dropped by the front gate.

Maura took that moment to step back and look at Jane and she couldn't help the manicured eyebrow that shot up at the familiarity of the Van Halen shirt. "That's one of Gabby's favourite shirts."

Jane sighed. Of course it was. It looked so old and beat up she thought it was something long forgotten, or used on laundry day. Instead she picked a shirt that would have been laced with memories for Melissa. She was extra thankful that Maura had brought her a change of clothes. "I'll treat it well," Jane offered half-heartedly.

Maura worried about her fiancée, the strain of the morning already looked to be getting to her. She continued to hold her hand while also bringing her free hand up to Jane's face, gently cupping her cheek and looking searchingly into darkened eyes that swirled with a mixture of emotions. "I'm more concerned with you treating yourself well. This can't be easy for you Jane. Let me help you."

Jane's eyes had closed at the tender touch of Maura's hand on her face. It was a small thing, but it brought them both much needed closeness. She opened them again and managed a soft smile. "I appreciate the offer Maura, more than you know. It's just, you haven't really been a big fan of Missy's and she knows it. She's got enough on her plate, you know?"

Maura couldn't really blame Jane for feeling that way. It made perfect sense that her presence might be more disruptive than helpful. She sighed heavily, "Then how about Kelly? Let her help you."

Jane groaned and shook her head. She hadn't been expecting that. In fact she had somewhat expected that Maura would have already sent Kelly packing for being such an ass to Gabby. "She's probably the last person Missy would want to see after this morning."

"Perhaps," Maura agreed, "But she might be the person Melissa should most talk to. They have a shared history, Jane."

Jane's nostrils flared defensively, she smelled a rat. "Maura, what's goin' on?"

Maura stroked Jane's check with her thumb, attempting to soothe her. She also offered a reassuring hand squeeze. "There's nothing going on Darling, I just thought Melissa would benefit from having an extra person on her side."

Jane's eyes narrowed, there was something about Maura's tone. She felt like she was being managed. She glanced towards the street, but couldn't see where Maura had parked. She looked back at Maura, frowning. "She's here, isn't she?"

Maura nodded. "I thought at the very least, you could talk to her. She feels terribly about what happened."

Jane stepped away and let go of Maura's hand, she shook her head angrily before looking directly at her partner. "So she fuckin' should," she hissed. "Missy literally collapsed in the shower from grief this morning. She was a broken, sobbing mess and it took me twenty damned minutes to get her out of there."

"Oh Jane…"

Jane waved her hand in the air dismissively, "I don't wanna fuckin' hear it."

Maura took a step back, she hadn't seen Jane this angry in two and a half years. It was a different kind of anger, less explosive, but by the look in her eyes and the way her body was vibrating, it was visceral. "Jane, please…"

"Why, Maura? Tell me why!" Jane demanded.

"I told you, I thought it could help."

"Why?" Jane roared. She knew she had escalated quickly and she knew that she needed to reel it in, but she was incensed. Maura was trying to manipulate the situation, but she couldn't figure out why. "Why would you care? You've made it very clear that you think Gabby is better off without her. You made it clear that she should deal with the consequences of her actions. So why now? What changed?"

Maura's face softened just enough to let Jane know she was very serious when she said, "Because she matters to you, Jane. I had coffee. I thought about it. I realised I sounded cold earlier and I didn't like how it made you look at me."

"Yeah well, I didn't like how it made me feel either." Jane agreed, appreciating that Maura had recognised how bad she had sounded. She took several deep breaths to moderate her incendiary temper. Channelling her focus helped her relax enough to apologise. "Sorry for acting like an ass. It's just a lot, you know?"

Maura nodded. "I know."

Jane studied Maura for a minute and hung her head a little. She bit her lower lip and her own eyes softened as she stepped closer to Maura and reached a hand out to tuck a stray section of hair back behind her ear. "I shouldn't have doubted you. You've always only ever wanted what was best for me, I'm sorry I lost sight of that. I love you."

"I love you too, Jane." Maura leaned up and kissed Jane tenderly, she let the kiss linger for a few moments longer than normal before pulling away. "I do want to help Jane, and if that's by staying out of it, that's what I'll do. However, I do think at the very least you should see if Melissa would consider talking to Kelly."

Jane pressed a kiss to Maura's forehead and when she pulled back she nodded in agreement. Asking Melissa if she wanted to talk to Kelly felt a lot more appropriate than just forcing it. "Yeah, I can do that. It should be her choice."

"Maybe even clear the air yourself? She is a friend you care about afterall."

Jane sighed, she knew Maura was right. She was being stubbornly angry about the situation, given she had first hand experience on how easy it was to be riled up by Gabby. "Yeah, I'll do that. Go and get her then, I can see you chomping at the bit."

Maura smiled and walked the several steps to the overnight bag, handing it to Jane she said. "You probably should change, that shirt belonged to Gabby's father. She would be apoplectic if anything happened to it."

Jane groaned and resisted the temptation to slap herself in the forehead. As if it wasn't bad enough that it was one of Gabby's favourite shirts, it was one that had belonged to her father. She hooked the bag over her shoulder and said, "Thanks for the warning." Motioning back over her shoulder she added, "I'm just going to change and check on Missy, I'll be back in a minute."


After handing Jane her house key and walking off, Gabby had walked north towards the city centre. It was still early and so when she reached the Brickfields park, she sat on a bench and watched traffic go by. She had time to fill in before she headed back south to Prospect, but didn't have much more to do other than retrieve her Triton from the police parking garage.

Her mobile phone rang and she looked at the caller, seeing that it was Maura she let it go to voicemail. She wasn't ready to face her best friend. It all hurt too much and as dearly as she loved Maura, she knew she didn't approve of Melissa and Gabby wasn't ready to hear the blunt, logical analysis supporting her decision. She wouldn't change her best friend for the world and she knew her heart was in the right place, but it was just too raw. Gabby needed to escape the claustrophobia of their now splintered friendship group.

It was that need that had spurred her into making a decision she didn't think she would have ever made, but she realised, it was the day for her doing things she never thought she would do again. She couldn't get the numb look on Melissa's face out of her mind. That was how she knew this time was different. There hadn't been any histrionics. No meltdown. There inevitably would be one, Gabby knew that much, that was why she had texted Jane in the first place, but it was apparent even Melissa could recognise the damage she had done. Perhaps Melissa would come crawling back, begging, looking for an umpteenth chance, but Gabby highly doubted it.

When the tears dried up Gabby wouldn't have been able to say how long she had been sitting in the park. Her eyes had glazed over, staring out unseeingly, her mind too busy reliving the past in an attempt to justify the damage she had done to her heart. It was the right decision, it was necessary, she just needed her brain to convince her heart of that so that she didn't go running back to an untenable situation.

At some point Gabby had started walking to the precinct so that she could pick up her Triton and drive south. As she approached her vehicle she saw Alec pull up in the parking spot next to hers. She lifted her hand and waved half heartedly in an attempt to maintain some semblance of normal. She forced half a smile when she reached the two vehicles as he exited his. "Morning, Alec."

"I wasn't expecting to see you here today," Alec commented, "Are you feeling more centred?"

Gabby couldn't help the sad chuckle that escaped her lips from thinking about the reality that she was not very centred at all. "Far from it," she admitted.

His brow creased with concern and he gave her a once over in an attempt to get a better read of her body language. Although she tried to hide it, he could see how emotionally distressed she was. "What happened?"

She sucked in a deep breath, nodding absently while mentally psyching herself up to try out the words that described her new reality. "I'm officially single. I broke up with Missy this morning."

"Damn," Alec said, "I'm so sorry."

Gabby shrugged, a little emotional numbness setting in. "Don't be, it had to happen." She sighed and shook her head in resignation. "I just can't trust her anymore, and you know me Alec, if there's no trust, there's nothing."

"Perhaps in time?" He offered in an attempt to sound hopeful.

Gabby shook her head. "Nah, I'm done. It sucks, but it is what it is and there's no going back now."

Alec offered her a sad smile. He felt badly for her, "You know you're like a sister to me, right? We might not always hang out, but that doesn't change how important you are to me. If you ever need anything, or a shoulder to cry on, whatever it may be. I've got you."

Gabby managed a genuine smile because she appreciated his sentiment, even more so with the knowledge she had of his having lost his sister in an accident when they were teenagers. It had been a life defining moment for him, and it had taken a night of drinking at the academy for him to open up enough to share that fact. "Thanks Alec, I appreciate it. It means more than you know."

He shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal. "Anytime."

She patted his shoulder a couple of times in thanks before changing the subject while she had him there. "Any updates on the Dyson case? Have you found any footage, or witnesses, or anything at all that could help us?"

Alec's face softened with the realisation that Gabby must have been hit really hard by her relationship ending. "Nothing new since you asked me last night."

"Ah, yes, that's right. We spoke last night." Gabby rubbed her forehead, "I didn't sleep well. I've been awake since two or three."

"You're going to be back on Monday, right?" He queried, concerned about her spending too much time out on stress leave and it potentially interfering with her promotion to detective. It was a bit of a boys club, so anything could happen if she were out too long.

Gabby nodded, reading his face perfectly. "Guaranteed. I worked too hard not to get that badge."

Alec smiled, "Damn right you did." He motioned towards the exit, "I hate to rush out on you at a time like this, but I have to get in there."

"By all means, go. I have somewhere I need to be anyway."

Alec nodded and started to walk away before hesitating for a moment and turning back to look at Gabby. "I meant what I said before Gabby. If you need anything at all, let me know."

Gabby appreciated his kindness. He had a habit of being there for her during the tough moments, even more so than her own brother. She realised that she considered him family too. "Thanks, see you Monday."

Gabby waited until he was gone before continuing her journey, which saw her pull up outside a freshly built, modern looking two story home in Prospect. She sat in her vehicle for ten minutes debating whether or not she had made the right decision being there, before throwing caution into the wind and just accepting it was what she needed. She exited her vehicle, locked it with the key fob and walked up to the house. She pressed the doorbell and waited.

The door opened and Alexis stood there, her hair tied back in a ponytail, a surprisingly casual look that caused Gabby to double take. Alexis took one look at her ex and knew immediately that something significant had happened. "You look like shit."

Gabby rolled her eyes and with her hands made a motion to indicate she would like to come inside. "Thanks for stating the obvious."

Alexis stood aside, "I was surprised to get your call."

"I was just as surprised to make it," Gabby admitted. She hadn't intended to make that specific call, it had just been what had happened. She could have called Maura, or even just returned back to her friend's home, but she hadn't.

Alexis closed the front door behind them and showed Gabby through to the kitchen. She waved in the direction of the kitchen island, "Feel free to take a seat. I'll whip you up something to eat."

Gabby couldn't help but admire the kitchen. It was spacious with top of the line appliances, and had a lot of bench space. It didn't surprise her in the least given Alexis had always been most at home in the kitchen. She followed the instruction she received and sat down on one of the island stools and watched as Alexis moved around the kitchen like she was one with it. "Thanks," she offered quietly, knowing damn well she wouldn't have a choice in the matter regarding the food.

Alexis had paying attention to the food she was making and her guests at the same time down to a fine art. Her eyes always knew where to be when necessary, her hands operating with muscle memory in food preparation she had done numerous times before. "You're here," Alexis surmised, all the while finely chopping onion, her eyes glancing up to meet Gabby's momentarily, "because you're finally done with Missy."

Gabby had been temporarily mesmerised watching the way Alexis' hands moved so fluently but her eyes shifted into focus upon hearing what her ex had said. She shouldn't have been surprised, it wasn't like she didn't know Alexis had no interest in entertaining her while Melissa was in the picture. "I guess my call gave that away, huh?"

Alexis stopped what she was doing for a moment, her hands hovering mid movement. "No. People are unpredictable. It's in your eyes."

"I look that broken?"

"Right now you just look numb." Alexis said, returning more slowly to her food preparation. "You looked done Tuesday night."

Gabby closed her eyes and dropped her chin a little as the thoughts of the week that had been flooded her mind. Looking back she had to admit Alexis' observation was pretty accurate. It had probably been longer than that if she were genuinely honest with herself, but she had been clinging to a past that was never going to return. Love really couldn't supersede trust in her mind, and she had tried, she had tried harder than most would have, but she just hadn't been able to change her core programming. Not when Melissa had given her so many reminders of past betrayals.

Gabby opened her eyes and lifted her head. "I was done long before then."

"Well good," Alexis said, "You need to be well away from that lesbian vortex of doom."

Gabby's eyes grew wide and her face was planted firmly in what the fuck territory. "Lesbian vortex of doom?"

"Precisely," Alexis said disgustedly, "I've lost count how many women I saw her flirting with and then leaving with at my bar."

"We were open," Gabby said partially in defence of Melissa, but mostly in defence of herself with the realisation that it made her look damn weak for allowing it to happen.

Alexis' head shot up and she locked eyes with Gabby, "Excuse me?"

Gabby shook her head and waved her ex off. "It's a long story, I don't really want to talk about it."

"Oh no, you are not dropping that bullshit excuse without explaining yourself." Alexis knew Gabby well, or at least she thought she did, but then a decade of only minor interactions left her missing a chunk of what currently defined her ex.

"No, I'm really not. I can't dwell on my past with Missy anymore."

It wasn't the statement so much as the look on Gabby's face that brought Alexis a level of joy, which she was wise enough to keep from her own face. She had waited more than a decade to hear those words come from her ex in a believable manner. "Well," she said, "What's next?"

Wasn't that the million dollar question? Gabby sighed and shrugged. "I honestly don't know. Focus on work I guess. I should be promoted to detective in the next couple of weeks."

Alexis looked up from the capsicum she was dicing and smiled, pleased to see Gabby finally take a step that would take her away from the streets. "Finally ready to sit behind a desk?"

Gabby knew that Alexis had never been a big fan of her enrollment in the academy, she had always worried it was too dangerous being a cop. It had been the other reason, besides the unexpected feelings for Melissa, she had broken it off with Alexis in the first place. "Yeah. I'm sure you're happy to hear that."

Alexis smiled slyly, unable to resist teasing her ex. "That would imply I still care."

Gabby was having none of it. "Are we really going to play that game?"

Alexis turned to the stove and stirred the pan where the onions were caramelising, taking a moment to formulate her approach. Finally she turned back and looked across the island at Gabby who was staring her down with a burning intensity in her eyes. "Well, we're playing the one where we pretend like we're old friends, are we not?"

"Ouch." Gabby visibly flinched, it was amazing how easy it was to forget that she had been the one to break Alexis' heart. "I guess I deserved that for thinking I could rock up after all these years and act like it was only yesterday that we actually gave a shit about one another."

Now that the pretence was clearly over Alexis asked, "So what are you really doing here?"

Gabby swallowed nervously, that was a very good question, one she had been trying to figure out on the entire drive over. Why had she even called Alexis in the first place? The only answer she could come up with was pretty petty, but there was one thing to be said about her relationship with Alexis over the years, it was an honest one. "Because I couldn't think of a better way to hurt her the way she's hurt me than to come back and…"

"And what?" Alexis asked, a hard tone to her voice. "Use me to get your kicks and then leave again?"

Gabby deserved that one and she knew it. She was in a shitty headspace and her thought process hadn't exactly been honourable. "No, I haven't ever lied to you Alex. Why do you think I'm being honest about my intentions right now?"

"You've come back for what you were angling for on Tuesday night until I cooled your embers." Alexis stated knowingly, she wasn't stupid. She knew from the moment Gabby had called exactly what she was looking for. "I'm nobody's rebound and you sure as Christ already know that, Gabrielle."

Gabby winced hearing her entire first name, nobody called her that, except for her long dead mother and Alexis when she was truly perturbed. "You're right. I apologise. I don't know what I was thinking."

Alexis' eyes softened, because she had zero intention of pushing Gabby away and allowing her to become a stranger again. She wanted Gabby in her life, would even go so far as to say she needed her. It had been a decade of multiple failures to move on and Gabby knew that as much as she did. It was the only reason she was always so antagonistic the moment they would get too flirtatious, or too close for even a moment. She was nobody's second choice, but with Gabby she was inclined to see if maybe they could recapture the good thing they had before Melissa had shown up on the scene and bewitched Gabby into leaving.

"Perhaps you remembered a time when life was simpler. A time where you were treated with the respect you deserve."

Gabby had to admit by comparison her relationship with Alexis had been a walk in the park, and a lot more respectful. She had never had to worry about a wandering eye or saving someone from their own head time and time again. She wasn't about to admit that though, allowing Alexis to hold that I told you so over her was simply an untenable idea. "Or perhaps I remembered the mind blowing sex, and am nothing but an arsehole willing to beg to get a taste of that again."

"Begging is futile, you know that." Alexis chose not to meet Gabby's eyes as she slid the capsicum into a small bowl and turned back to the stove. In mere moments she felt a presence behind her and Gabby's breath against her neck. "Gabrielle," she warned, "Don't."

Gabby respected Alexis' warning not to touch. However she stood as close as she could without doing so, her hands hovered over hips and she leaned close to her ex's ear. "Tell me to leave," she whispered.

Alexis felt the electricity, she knew her body would respond if Gabby was given half a chance, but her heart wasn't ready to be broken all over again. She switched off the stove and turned to face her ex. She reiterated quite firmly, "I'm nobody's rebound."

Gabby turned her head away and stepped back, her hands up in the air as she backed away. "Alright, message received loud and clear. Forget it."

Alexis watched as Gabby hurriedly retreated and made a move to leave. She followed behind her, kicking herself for the force she had spoken with. "Gabby, wait."

Gabby's hand was literally on the front door handle when she stopped and turned to look at Alexis. "For what? You've made it abundantly clear you're not interested."

"Just because I don't want to fuck you so you can get back at your ex doesn't mean I won't be here for you in other ways. You can talk to me, no judgement."

"God, it's not even about that," Gabby growled, mostly angry with herself for the surge of unstable emotions she had been feeling. "I just wanted to… fuck, it doesn't matter."

Alexis could see the pain in Gabby's eyes and she hated it. She hated that it had ever been allowed to happen. She hated herself for the things she did in her youth that may have driven Gabby away in the first place, because she had surely driven her into the arms of a woman who had left behind a trail of devastation. "You just wanted to do what?"

Gabby's hands clenched by her side and she looked away, she felt overwhelmed. Looking back at Alexis she said, "I just wanted to feel good alright? I wanted to remember what it felt like to be respected. To be cared about, hell to just look into eyes that were right there with me in that moment… is that so wrong?"

"Gabby…"

"No," Gabby roared, out of nowhere, her right hand pounding into her own thigh. "I get it alright. I fucking get it. I broke your heart, and all this shit I've endured is what I deserve. It was stupid to come here." Gabby turned back to the door and was about to turn the handle for the second time when she felt a tug on her free hand. She turned, and Alexis was right there in her personal space. She swallowed thickly, her eyes tried to read the ones staring back at her. "Just let me go," she uttered, completely broken.

Alexis took her hands and framed Gabby's face, wiping multiple tears away. She had never seen Gabby this fragile, ever, and it pained her deeply. "I can't do that," she offered quietly, "I've never been able to, and you know that."

Gabby's eyes closed at the sensation of those delicate, but firm hands on her face and she realised she had been crying. She gently pulled Alexis' hands away and shook her head gently, "Don't. Don't put yourself through this. You were right. You deserve more than to be somebody's rebound. You definitely deserve to be more than my rebound."

"Don't tell me what I deserve."

"This was a mistake." Gabby gently pushed Alexis further away so that she could leave. She opened the door and headed for her vehicle. She shouldn't have gone there. She shouldn't have tried to put another person through the same sort of shit she had been through. It was lunacy, and so very wrong.

Alexis knew that if she let Gabby leave in the state she was in, she was unlikely to come back and she just wasn't ready to take that chance. She hurried after Gabby and pressed her hand against the Triton's door as her ex attempted to open it. "Look at me."

Gabby turned back around, they were standing very close to one another and her heart ached so damn much that fresh tears streamed down her face. "Alex," she sobbed, "I'm not worth the heartache."

"Christ, Gabby," Alexis mumbled as she leaned in, "You're the only one that has ever been worth it!"


Phew, that was a huge chapter. In less than a week too, I hope you all enjoyed. I think it's also a good time to remind that this is a soapie/drama... okay good, great, wonderful!

And dayam Kelly, what on earth happened to you since we last saw you? Dropping bombs on everyone!