Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

The Third Variable Problem

When trying to determine the relationship between two variables, it is important to consider if there are any additional variables involved. Because when a third variable is present that no one is aware of, it can mislead data. Because sometimes the third variable is a better explanation of the observed relationship than the two variables being measured.


I walked across the schoolyard with my shoulders hunched up to my ears and with Shino at my side. "Look who's trying to fit in", Ami said loud enough to be heard over her sniggering friends as we passed by on our way into the building. It was Shino's and my first day back at the academy after the grand upset. And my first day wearing the new clothes Shibi had dragged me to shop for yesterday. And hadn't that been an adventure.

With substantial miscommunication on both our ends, Shibi became uncomfortable when I mentioned needing bras and other undergarments, and just the overall abundance he made me buy, the shopping trip took more time than it would have if I had just gone on my own. Although, I have a hunch as to why Shibi felt the need to accompany me. A need that wasn't unfounded. I had tried to run away from him twice during that outing.

Shino opened the door and waited stoically for me to enter first. As had been his habit these last two days. He appeared to go out of his way to ensure things were easy for me, despite the circumstances. He and Shibi both. Like opening doors, fetching things from cabinets, or buying me new clothes. Hell, in the evenings, they even let me take the first bath because they thought I would be uncomfortable going after my male relatives.

"Ne", I said to get Shino's attention as we started walking the halls to get to our classroom. "How much trouble would I be in if I beat the crap out of a bunch of our classmates in an unsanctioned fight?"

Shino turned his head to look at me through his sunglasses as we continued walking. That was the first interaction I had initiated with him in the last couple of days that wasn't sarcastic and hostile. "The standard consequence for an unsanctioned fight is detention". Shino said in a flat voice. Appropriate, considering that his answer was common knowledge.

"I meant Shibi", I clarified; my shoulders relaxing now that I was out of the vicinity of pre-teen girls.

Shino looked forward again as we approached our classroom; only a few doors away. "You wish to know how much trouble you'll be in with father", Shino paraphrased for me. He liked to do that. Especially when I mentioned Shibi by his first name. I think it was Shino's way of attempting to get me to accept this new family dynamic. "I don't know", Shino said as we came to a halt in front of the classroom. "Why? Because I have never been in an unsanctioned fight".

Never? I wanted to ask because playground brawls were kind of a rite of passage in the academy. The teachers used sparring as a way to measure our abilities and as a consequence, we used fighting to establish our own social hierarchies. But I allowed myself to slow down for a moment and thought about it. Shino never got pulled into scuffles because he unnerved people. From how he dressed to how he held himself. Even his voice contributed to how people perceived him. It helped that he had thousands of little allies in his corner that naturally unsettled people.

Having found my answer, I changed the subject. It was a subject that had been a growing worry in the back of my mind since Shibi brought me into his home. "Now that I'm…" I struggled to find words I could use that I was comfortable with. Family? Related by blood? An Aburame? "Claimed", I settled on after a moment. "Am I going to end up with a bunch of bugs living inside of me?" That was a fear of mine. One that I hadn't worked up the courage to ask until now. Though that was mostly because I didn't want Shibi to think I was taking an interest in the Aburame clan.

"No", Shino answered. I sighed in relief; not caring if Shino found my reaction rude or not. "Why? Because a nest must take root in a vessel right after birth. While you have the type of chakra special to the Aburame clan that is required to host a nest, you are too old to successfully survive the infestation". Bless small mercies. Even though Shino's bugs were impressive and gave him a whole lot of benefits, I didn't want to share my body with other lifeforms.

A moment passed with just the two of us standing face to face in front of the classroom door. I blinked. I'm assuming Shino blinked under his sunglasses. He didn't move. Neither did I; both of us waiting for the other to make the first move. "Well, good talk", I said; opening the classroom door before Shino could do it for me.

As has become the trend, Sasuke was already seated by the time I entered the classroom. I left Shino to find his own seat and slipped into my assigned spot. Sasuke was eyeing me with his peripherals. I know because I could feel it. But he didn't say anything. So, I didn't either. Which suited both of us just fine.

The volume began to pick up in the classroom as more and more students filed in. There were some fowl looks cast in my direction due to my seatmate. But other than that, no one seemed to notice that I had undergone an Aburame makeover over the weekend. Or so it had seemed.

"What happened to you?" Naruto asked before he had even sat down.

It didn't take much thought to figure out who Naruto was talking to. Though that didn't mean I couldn't let off some steam. As if I didn't know who Naruto was talking about, I glanced around the room before looking at the blond. "Who? Me?"

"Yes, you", Naruto said loudly. "Your hair is different", Naruto observed as he eyed me with all the scrutiny he could muster. Which wasn't much.

"No, it isn't". I argued as I twirled the end of my braid around my finger. And it wasn't. I had worn my hair in a braid every day of school since my first year. Although, I suppose it was slightly messier than usual. Considering that Anzu couldn't help me with it anymore.

Naruto frowned. "Your clothes then", he insisted. So sure that something about me had changed. Even if he couldn't quite put a finger on it. That was a feeling that I knew very well and hated.

Shrugging a hapless shrug, I said, "I don't know what to tell you, Naruto. These are the same clothes I've always worn".

"No, it's not!" Naruto continued his assistance that something had changed. He pointed at my shirt with his right index finger. "Your shirt has a stripe on it. In that weird bluey-green color girls like". Teel. Naruto was attempting to describe teel.

Glancing down at my front, I ran a hand over the stripe Naruto mentioned. The softness of the cotton was something I'd appreciate under most circumstances. But I wasn't ready to do that yet. "I always wear this color". I spoke slowly as I looked up at Naruto; looking at him like he had grown a second head.

"No, you don't!" Naruto was getting frustrated at this point. As evident by the hyperactive gestures he was making with his hands. "You usually wear brown, and gray, and… and why are you smiling at me like that?"

If I had put my mind to it, I could have continued this ruse for a while longer. Naruto was no Shikamaru after all. If I wanted to, I could probably keep him scratching his head for a couple of days. But alas, that required more patience and stamina than I was willing to spare. So, I let my amusement show. An expression that led to Naruto sputtering when he caught on that I was messing with him.

"Good morning, everyone", Iruka-Sensei greeted as he entered the room.

Leaving Naruto to sort his thoughts out, I faced forward. It's important to have fun when you can.


"Rion", Anzu groaned into the palm of her hand. "You can't keep doing this".

I ignored her as I walked further into the room; closing the door behind me. "The store was out of pre-made chicken dinner you like so I got pork instead". Placing the plastic bag containing our dinners on the makeshift desk, I turned towards Anzu.

Her hair was disheveled. And she was sitting cross-legged on the futon in the middle of the room. I guess it's a good thing I didn't get here any earlier. "You're not supposed to be here. You're going to get in trouble". I turned my back to her as I unpacked the food. The shop I had bought the food from wasn't far, so it was still warm. "Where does Aburame-san think you are?" Anzu asked when I failed to respond to her.

"No idea", I spoke honestly as I held out one of the meals for Anzu. She took it and held it in both of her hands without making a move to open it. Dropping down into the desk chair, I had no problem opening my meal. "He took a mission this morning and hadn't made it back when Shino and I returned to his house after school". Breaking apart the chopsticks that were included, I took a few bites as I waited for Anzu to respond. Hmm. A bit too salty for my tastes.

"Well, what about Shino?" Anzu asked once she had time to process. "What did he do when you left?"

I took my time to chew and swallow before answering. "Don't know. I told him I had a headache was going to take a nap before climbing out the window again. For all I know, he still thinks I'm asleep". Finishing my answer with a shrug, I took another bite. That was the only way I could of getting away from Shino. While he respected my privacy when I did things like sleeping and using the bathroom, Shino was…. let's just say he took his newfound role as brother very seriously.

"Rion", Anzu groaned again; her tone growing deeper. That was my cue that she was about to attempt a lecture.

"Ne", I interrupted before she could start. "Do you want one-hundred Ryo?" Pulling out a wad of cash from my pocket I tossed it in Anzu's direction. Her eyes widened as the money landed on the futon close to her right knee.

"Where did you get this?" Anzu asked; absolutely horrified.

"Shibi's wallet", I said as if I had just admitted to taking a casual stroll around town. "He left it unattended on the kitchen counter last night".

"That's stealing", Anzu exclaimed. She hadn't moved an inch as she stared at the wad of money as if afraid it would come alive and attack her.

"You should really eat your food. It's going to get cold". I covered my mouth as I yawned. It had been a long day at the academy where I had done absolutely nothing other than ignoring my classmates who insisted there was something different about me. I swear people don't understand how much of a challenge it can be to do nothing.

"I didn't teach you to steal", Anzu kept going.

"No, you didn't", I agreed. "Iruka-Sensei did". True story too. I mean, it had been a part of a lesson on obtaining information from enemy nin and targets without them knowing about it. But I found that lesson generalized rather nicely to other things.

"Rion, you can't steal from your-"

I cut Anzu off; not wanting to hear that word. "Why not? Shibi doesn't need it and you do. Think of it as overdue child support". Was that a thing in Konoha? I wasn't sure, but Anzu didn't seem confused by my mention of it. So, maybe it was.

Anzu shook her head; causing strands of red hair to dance in front of her face. "This is wrong. This is-"

This time it wasn't me who cut her off. A sharp knock on the door had done the job. Anzu frowned at me as she exhaled loudly from her nose. Setting the food I had given her on the futon, Anzu stood up and made a couple of steps needed to answer the door.

On the other side was Shibi. Surprise. Surprise. "I apologize for the disturbance", he said; bowing at the waist as soon as the door had opened.

"You could have at least waited until we finished eating", I complained around a mouthful of half-chewed food.

Hastily, Anzu bowed back as she moved out of the way for Shibi to enter. "No. I.. um… I mean... I'm sorry", she sputtered.

Shibi paid her efforts little mind as he looked in my direction and frowned; making sure that I could see the lower half of his face rather than just his sunglasses and shirt collar. Sighing, I placed my meal down and dropped the chopsticks inside the container. "So, when did you get back?" I asked; standing up.

"My mission did not take me out of the village", Shibi said; not sounding like a parental figure who was disappointed.

His answer didn't really tell me anything. But I didn't really care, so I moved closer; knowing that this was going to end in a silent and awkward walk back to Shibi's house. Shibi moved to the side so I could walk past him and out the door. However, Anzu spoke up before I could. "Wait a moment", she said; turning back to the futon where she quickly picked up the stolen Ryo. "I promise", Anzu stated in a voice eager to be believed as she turned back and held out the money for Shibi to take. "I did teach her that stealing was wrong. But Rion said that she… took this from your wallet". I scowled as I watched the money transfer from Anzu's hands to Shibi's. Anzu's face flushed scarlet as she refused to look at either of us and I found myself reaching for anger. It was a stupid move on her part. There was enough money there that she could have taken a few days and not have to work at all.

Shibi was pocketing the money one moment. And in the next, his hand was on the back of my head; pushing me down into a bow of my own. Biting my tongue to keep myself from making an indignant squawking sound at the treatment, I heard Shibi say, "I apologize for my daughter's inconsiderate actions".

There were two things about that statement that had me on edge. First, that he had called me a daughter. Even though we were far from having that sort of relationship. Second, inconsiderate? What part about giving someone money was inconsiderate?

"Um… no", Anzu tried to say. "it's… um", She never got to finish that sentence.

Shibi allowed me to stand up straight, but only to get me out of the door. He moved his hand from my head to my shoulder as he guided us out of the building. On the streets, we passed a few people. All of which made a wide berth as soon as they got a good look at Shibi. Walking as close to him as I was, I couldn't see his face. But I could understand their avoidance. The vibes Shibi was currently projecting weren't warm fuzzy ones.

There was a lot I wanted to say. From telling Shibi to let me go, or demanding to know why I was the inconsiderate one when he was the person keeping me away from my sister. But I was struggling to find the words I thought would provoke the biggest response.

Shibi didn't say a word until we were out of the red district. "Rion", he started as we turned a corner; making me wonder if he had purposely waited until we were in a better part of the village before beginning to discuss whatever was on his mind. "Your actions have embarrassed your sister and they are causing her stress".

I glared with my eyes directed at the ground as I shrugged his hand off my shoulder. Shibi allowed it. The embarrassed part I got. Anzu's face had suggested as much. But the stress part… "I'm helping my sister".

Shibi disagreed. "There is greater consequence than benefit from having a child steal for an adult".

"I don't think it's stealing", I argued; scuffing the dirt road with the toe of my sandal. "Not when the person you took it from is holding you against your will". It was a bold statement. Especially considering the fact that I had been able to escape Shibi's house twice since all this started. However; at that moment, it felt right. It was a statement strong enough that it matched my feelings. Even if the meaning of its words weren't completely accurate.

Shibi came to a standstill in front of a dango stand. I was tempted to keep walking and feign that I hadn't noticed he had stopped. But curiosity had me coming to a halt along with him. I wanted to know how he would justify destroying my life. I wanted to hear how he thought he was doing the right thing. "Daughter", Shibi started; seemingly ignoring when I bristled at the term.

Unfortunately, whatever he was going to say was interrupted. It was a lesson as to why one shouldn't have private conversations in front of dango stands. "So, this is the runt who everyone's gossiping about".

My attention, along with Shibi's, snapped to the newcomer. I didn't know her personally. But it was easy to tell which family she came from by the fang marks on her cheeks, the wild hair, and the giant dog standing at her side. "Tsume", Shibi greeted with a slight nod of his head. Tsume? Kiba's mom then.

Tsume's eyes were on me as she took her time to study my form. She wasn't being shy about it. "You sure the kid's yours?" She asked; the corner of her lips pulling back into a grin. "I don't see a family resemblance".

A joke. It had to be a joke. The way Shibi dressed made it was impossible to get any real sense of what his physical features looked like. "I thank you again", Shibi said as if he hadn't heard Tsume's attempt at humor. "For the Inuzuka clan's support during this time".

Tsume rubbed the bridge of her nose; her eyes flickering away from me and to Shibi. "Don't mention it. Usually, it's my lot risking the family name, getting bad reputations, and offending the delicate sensibilities of others". She said that last bit with a heavy air of sarcasm. Something I would have appreciated if I wasn't currently fuming. "It's nice to see the esteemed Aburame clan join us on our level".

At this point, a person would be expected to respond. But Shibi didn't and Tsume just kept talking. An action that spoke of familiarity with Shibi. Or maybe just the Aburame clan in general. I suppose that makes sense. Both the Aburame and the Inuzuka specialized in tracking. "This should blow over in a couple of weeks. You're not the first to have a kid born outside of your clan". What needed to blow over? Tsume was talking like Shibi was facing some sort of backlash. But I was struggling to imagine what that backlash would look like or why.

"But he is the first to claim such a pup", a voice growled from Tsume's side.

I jumped at the sudden reminder that some ninken could talk. Of course, that was a piece of information I had retained from previous memories. But until now, I had never encountered one.

Tsume snickered at my reaction. "From what my brat told me", Tsume started to say. I'm assuming she's referring to Kiba. "None of the kids at the academy have caught on yet. The information is still circling through the shinobi gossip mill". I had questions about that. Mostly, why was Shibi having a bastard child interesting news? Look at the residents of the red district. Most of us had unknown parents out there. And also, how much did Kiba know? "But that's not going to last much longer". Tsume's words were a warning. An ominous one. Again, why?

Shibi inclined his head a second time. "The Aburame clan is ready". Ready for what? This was one thing I didn't like about being a kid. No matter how old you were, if you carried the title of underage, adults would talk over your head as if you couldn't understand things even if they took the time to explain them.

Tsume nodded to show she had heard him before redirecting her attention back to me. "Welcome to the club, kid", she said; talking to me directly for the first time. I didn't know specifically want the Inuzuka head meant by the club. There was only an inkling that it wouldn't have been a club I would've been invited to if Shibi hadn't made himself known. "You should hang out with Kiba", Tsume advised. Why? I have no idea. "He can help when the others try to sink their claws into you".

"No thanks", I answered with a snarl; the implication in her words that things were about to get harder going above my current ability to respond. "The Aburame already have a bug problem. I don't need to add fleas to the mix".

Tsume threw her head back and let out a wild bark of laughter.

"Rion", Shibi scolded; using the greatest amount of intonation that I had ever heard from him.

Waving a hand at Shibi, Tsume shook her head; grinning. "Don't worry about it, Shibi. The brat's going to need that bite to get through this".