Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Axioms of Probability
An axiom is a statement or position that is considered to be self-evident. Obvious. Apparent. In regards to probability, there are three axioms:
1. The chances an event will happen is either positive or negative. One or zero. There is no in-between.
2. The chances of an event occurring are absolute. One hundred percent certain. There is no doubt.
3. If two events cannot occur at the same time, the odds of one occurring is the sum of both of the events' chances of happening.
Despite its good quality, the ginger pork sitting in front of me didn't register as flavorful. It felt like chewed-up gloop in my mouth as I stared out the restaurant's front entrance. The side of pickled vegetables was going down a similar way.
There was probably a mile between me and the hotel. This was done by design. I couldn't feign ignorance if I was too close to the upcoming disturbance. But being too far away felt risky. How would I know when to go back?
My pack was left in the hotel. As dense as he could be, even Naruto would be suspicious if I took my pack on a food run. So, I was limited to my kunai holster and back pouch. Taking a sip of water to wash down the bites of food I barely tasted, I ran through what could be deduced. Jiraiya leaving with the woman meant Itachi and Kisame were already here. Had already seen us and knew who Naruto traveled with. Of course, this also meant Kakashi had been attacked. Was Sasuke currently running from hotel to hotel? Was Gai hot on his heels? Both were good reasons to stay behind the walls of this restaurant. There was little point in hiding only to get pulled into nonsense a few minutes later.
Inside the restaurant was just as loud as the street. Different tables talked at different volumes. All were trying to be heard over the hustle and bustle. Usually, I avoided busy establishments; finding them annoying under normal circumstances. But right now, the crowd was an asset. A full house meant the wait staff didn't check on me too often. With every table occupied, I didn't stand out.
Both Itachi and Kisame were bad news. However, Kisame was scarier than his partner. With a sword that absorbs chakra, my shields would be useless. Naruto would be fine, I told myself; moving bits of food around my plate. Sasuke would get there in time to delay Naruto's kidnapping… He'd get the stuffing knocked out of him. But it's fine. Itachi won't kill him. No need to feel guilty.
I took a long drink of water. Then Jiraiya would return. Kisame and Itachi would flee. Nothing to worry about. As long as I stay out of the way, there's nothing to suggest things won't pan out as they're supposed to.
A flare of chakra. The sound of stampeding feet. A wooden door slammed open. Water spilled down the front of my shirt as a blur of green flashed into existence and grabbed my shoulders. "Rion!" Gai shook my shoulders. Making it difficult for my eyes to bring him into focus. I inhaled a mouthful of water. The burning sensation took over as it clogged my airways and I started coughing.
The robust and lively restaurant fell usually silent as heads turned and people gawked. Not that Gai seemed to notice. "You're not missing! Anzu will be so relieved". Ignoring my desperate hacking cough and the bewildered stares, Gai pulled me into a bone-breaking hug.
As my body shuddered at the deep pressure, I thought about how Gai was doing this. Shouldn't there be a table between us? In between spurts of coughing, I found my answer. Gai was perched on top of the table; balanced on his toes and my food knocked to the floor.
"What are you doing here?" I wheezed, my voice coming out in a painful rasp. Although a better question was how did he find me.
A figure moved from behind Gai in a much more composed manner. My eyes locked on him immediately. Of course, the damn beetle. "Gai", Shibi spoke in a monotone; his sunglasses and high collar made it impossible to see his face. "Please release my daughter".
A slow murmur of discussion started as the initial shock wore off amongst the other customers. Gai complied… sort of. He broke his hold but kept his hands on my shoulders. At least it was easier to breathe. "What's going on?" I asked as the coughing subsided and my voice returned to normal. "Is it about Danzo?" As if I didn't already know.
Shibi shook his head as Gai pulled my attention back to him. "Where is Master Jiraiya? Have you seen Sasuke?" Each word spoken was matched with a small shake of my shoulders.
Frowning and forehead wrinkling, I did my best to pretend. "Why would Sasuke be here?" And then, before anyone could answer me. "Jiraiya ditched us back at the hotel for a bimbo half his age".
Shibi sighed. Nodding to the wait staff slowly inching closer. Gai's grip tightened. His face was uncomfortably close to mine and his eyes stretched wide. "What about Naruto? Did he go with Master Jiraiya?"
Trying to create distance, I leaned back in my seat. "No. Didn't you hear me? Jiraiya ditched us at the hotel". Then I ditched Naruto. But that didn't need to be said aloud.
Gai's nostrils flared. A fire lit in his eyes. I'm not sure how or when it happened, but Gai's hands moved from my shoulders to under my armpits. And suddenly I was aloft; dangling from Gai's hold as he stood tall on top of the table. "We must hasten to the hotel!" He declared. Still unaware of the highly confused audience watching. Everyone's mouths hung open. Some with half-chewed food inside.
Before I could protest or attempt violence to regain my freedom, Gai tucked me under his arm and bounded off the table. "Wait!" I complained as he sprinted for the exit. "I haven't paid yet!" Shibi lingered. Hopefully to deal with the mess Gai and I left behind.
Gai didn't carry me far. Eventually, it clicked that he didn't know what hotel we were staying at. On a rooftop, talking over the sounds of a city with many sights, Gai set me down. "Which hotel?"
"Shouldn't we wait for Shibi?"
"He'll find us", Gai disagreed. And I knew he was right. Damn bug. "Which hotel?"
The sun was slightly lower in the sky. But its rays were just as harsh as early afternoon. Stationed on a roof, the heat felt worse than if we were on the street. I could tell Gai. Then he could run off to save the day. Or kick Jiraiya in the face. And I'd still be out of the way. No need to get involved. Shibi being here was unexpected. Although his presence didn't have to be a bad thing, right? He wouldn't let me run off to face members of the Akatsuki… probably.
That's what I wanted to do. It would've been easy. Staying out of the way was smart. Safe. And not just for me. But for the others too. It would mean one less genin for Gai, Shibi, and Jiraiya to worry about. However; staring into Gai's earnest eyes, my body reacted with a response I never consented to. "It's this way", I said; turning my back to Gai and building up some chakra to bound from rooftop to rooftop.
Gai followed; matching my pace as we traveled much faster than if we were on the street. My splinted wrist ached as we ran. As if reminding me that I wasn't at one hundred percent. What did this mean; Gai and Shibi finding me? Would this make Gai even later to the fight? Earlier? I couldn't decide. At least this made the guilty nausea I'd been dealing with lessen.
"It's this one", I said; pointing to the correct build as Gai and I stopped on an adjacent roof. "We're staying on the second floor so…" I counted the number of windows; hoping they aligned with the number of doors I counted earlier. "That would be our room". My finger pointed to the very last window.
Gai nodded. His jaw set in a determined grimace. There was no gaping hole in the wall. I thought. That meant we must have beaten Jiraiya. So, was Sasuke currently getting the snot knocked out of him? I strained my ears. But couldn't hear any tortured screams.
"Alright, Rion", Gai began. "I'll-"
Gai was cut off by a loud rumble of destroyed wood and a scream of fright. Lurching forward, Gai charged towards the hotel. "Stay where you are!" He yelled over his shoulder.
Not needing to be convinced, I nodded; watching as Gai broke through the window I indicated. Glass shards went flying as he disappeared. With my good hand, my nondominant hand, I pulled out a kunai. This wasn't my fight. There wasn't anything I could do except get in the way. But it still felt wrong to not have a weapon at hand.
Naruto would be okay. I told myself; circulating my chakra and widening my stance. Sasuke won't die. Those two things, I kept repeating; watching and waiting. Shibi arrived at the same moment a loud, furious battle cry reached my ears. "Dynamic Entry!"
"Gai", Shibi said with a displeased sigh as he landed next to me. The emotion was understood. Usually, the advisable thing to do was wait until there was a comrade to watch your back.
A heavy hand landed on my head; smoothing down hairs that had been ruffled by Gai's manhandling. "Wait for my signal", Shibi instructed. Before he too charged for the hotel; jumping through the same window Gai broke.
Just as I wanted, I wasn't involved. And that part felt great. However; being as close as I was to the action, and knowing the people involved made me fidgety. Would they really be okay? Were Shibi and Gai enough to face Itachi and Kisame? It felt wrong to tear my eyes away from the hotel, but I quickly scanned the streets below. Locals and tourists continued on their way; laughing and talking. Completely unaware of the shinobi battle taking place dangerously close to them. Where was Jiraiya?
Wood splintered as a wall on the second floor of the hotel was destroyed. A single figure adorned in a black cloak with red clouds ran out. His legs propelled him forward from rooftop to rooftop as a swarm of bugs chased him. From the streets below, people gasped and yelped as bits of wood and plaster fell around them.
The bug Shibi had planted on me scurried with excitement. I could feel it making my scalp itchy. Sasuke looked just like him, I couldn't help but think as Itachi ran past me a few rooftops away. A red eye turned in my direction as I stood still with a kunai clenched in my good hand. However, the swarm of bugs kept him moving. Not that it mattered. In this equation, I was unimportant.
But where was Kisame? A surge of chakra was followed by a presence appearing behind me. Acting on instinct, my good hand lashed out; intending to stab whoever it was who got too close. My attack was intercepted by a hand wrapping around my good wrist.
"What's all this?" Jiraiya asked as I turned my head in his direction. Crouching next to me on the roof, the hand that wasn't holding my wrist was used to keep an unconscious woman secure as she rested over his shoulder.
"Did you roofy your date?" I asked; despite knowing the answer.
It had the desired effect. Jiraiya sputtered and instantly let go of my wrist. "No, I did not! This young lady was under a genjutsu. Someone was trying to lure me away from you brats".
Naruto. Someone was trying to lure you away from Naruto. I corrected in my head. "If you knew, why did you leave?"
Jiraiya sniffled delicately. "Well, I needed to know who was after us, right? Playing along was the easiest way to find out".
Turning back to the hotel and its gaping hole, I tried to give my body time to catch up to my thoughts. Even though it felt impossible to accomplish anytime soon. "You just missed him", I said; pointing in the direction Itachi fled. "A man in a black cloak with red clouds just ran that way".
Jiraiya didn't look in the direction I indicated. "Akatsuki", he muttered to himself. "Is Naruto alright?"
I shrugged. Meanwhile, the swarm chasing Itachi returned to the hotel like a morbid black smog. "You're in trouble", I declared as Jiraiya frowned at the sight. Deciding that was the signal, I started for the hotel.
"Why?" Jiraiya asked as he followed; unconscious woman and all.
"Because Shibi's here and he knows you ditched Naruto and me". Jiraiya flinched and I tried not to smile.
Standing in the severely damaged hotel hallway, I bit the nail of my thumb; trying to work out what happened. Unfortunately, Sasuke and Naruto weren't making it easy. "Why did you bring a girl here, Pervy-Sage?" Naruto demanded to know as he waved his arms around.
Sasuke stood in front of Shibi and Gai. "Itachi is mine" He declared; glaring like a cat who'd been doused in water. "I'm the only one who'll eliminate him". He stood tall. Agitated and worked up. But completely uninjured.
Let's start with the facts. I thought, keeping to the background. Gai rushed to help because Sasuke had left the village to save Naruto. That hadn't changed. Shibi joining him was new. Probably because he knew how to find us if I had to guess. Because they were able to find us (me) so quickly, they beat Jiraiya to the hotel and managed to intervene before Itachi could test Sasuke's sanity.
"Sasuke", Gai tried; kneeling in front of the avenger and placing a well-meaning hand on his shoulder. "I admire your youthful spirit. However, I cannot allow a precious genin of Konoha to face an S-rank criminal alone". As if such sentiment would work on anyone other than Lee.
Together, Shibi and Gai were enough to force Itachi to flee. Between Gai's stamina and Shibi's nest, they were a terrifying duo. That wasn't difficult to figure out. What I struggled with…
"When someone knocked on the door, I thought it was you getting dumped or Rion coming back with dinner. But it wasn't", Naruto explained; telling the events as he saw them. "It was a man. He said he was there for the nine-tailed fox!"
… was Kisame. Where the hell was he? Naruto said only one man, Itachi, was here. Didn't the Akatsuki always work in pairs? It was baffling. This change… it didn't make any sense and I couldn't guess at the antecedents.
"Then Sasuke got here. He attacked the man with his Chidori. But the man stopped him! Then Gai-Sensei arrived and fought him so Sasuke didn't have to-"
"It should have been me!" Sasuke broke in.
Naruto was undeterred. "And then Rion's dad appeared and chased him off with a bunch of bugs! You should've seen it, Pervy-Sage" Naruto gushed. "I bet they wouldn't have been tricked by a pretty girl!"
"Daughter", Shibi said as he approached. Standing in front of me, he blocked Gai and Sasuke from my sight. Together, we ignored Naruto and Jiraiya arguing in the background.
"Shibi", I returned.
"Why did you leave the hotel?" Shibi asked. He spoke using his normal tone. Meaning, I couldn't decipher if he approved or was disappointed.
"I was hungry", I answered. "And we didn't know when Jiraiya would be back, so I didn't want to wait".
Reaching out, Shibi rested a heavy hand on top of my head. It reminded me very much of when I was ten. "You are unharmed?" Shibi checked.
I nodded.
"Now, you are aware of your friend's status as a jinchuriki", Shibi continued; sounding almost reluctant. "However, it remains an S-rank secret. You cannot tell-"
"Don't worry about it", I said; moving out from under his hand. "I've known about that for a while".
Shibi flinched as Sasuke continued to tell Gai exactly why only he should be the one to fight Itachi. "When?" Shibi asked; nervously adjusting his sunglasses.
"When I was six", I lied with a lackadaisical shrug. "It wasn't hard. Why? Because after seeing how people treated Naruto and doing the math, it was stupidly obvious".
Shibi stared at me. It was a challenge to not wiggle under its intensity. "Wait!" Naruto's loud voice prevented anything Shibi might have said or done. "What do you mean Kakashi-Sensei was injured?" leaving his conversation with Jiraiya, Naruto whirled around to interject himself into the discussion Gai was having with Sasuke.
"Itachi was in Konoha first", Sasuke explained through clenched teeth. "Kakashi-Sensei found him. They fought".
"Is he okay?" Naruto demanded to know.
Gai stared at his feet; worry etched into his expression. "We don't know when he'll come out of it". There was no mistaking the severity of Gai's concern. "What we need is a supreme specialist, a healing master. As soon as possible".
"You're right", Jiraiya agreed; taking advantage of the somber air that filled the destroyed hallway. "And the person you're talking about is exactly who we were sent to find". Gai's eyes widened while Shibi remained unsurprised. "Lady Tsunade is the only one who will be able to help Kakashi, and protect the village".
A heavy silence hung over the heads of the adults as they thought. However, they weren't allowed to linger in it. "I'm coming with you", Sasuke declared; staring right at Jiraiya as if demanding him to refuse.
"Hang on a minute", Jiraiya tried in a tired drawl.
His mistake was not speaking faster than Naruto. "Alright! That's a great idea. With Sasuke, I bet we can find this Tsunade person even faster".
"Sasuke", Gai interjected as my mind whirled. "You left the village without permission. You need-"
"That doesn't matter", Sasuke argued. "There is no Hokage right now. No one can give me orders".
If Sasuke joined, he'd meet Orochimaru sooner. What would the consequence of that be, I wondered. Shibi adjusted his glasses. It was a cue that he wanted to speak. Unfortunately for him, I was the only person who knew that. "Perhaps Sasuke should go with them", Shibi suggested. The other adults gawked at him in surprise while Sasuke glared with distrust. "Three genin working together may be safer. Why? Because Jiraiya-Sama seems prone to leaving them to their own devices". Glancing in Jiraiya's direction, something evil glinted in Shibi's glasses. Immediately, Jiraiya took a hurried step back.
