Thank you all for the kind comments. I wish I had time to respond to each one, but I'm always in a hurry lately.
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Chapter 11
That pregnancy soon turned out to be very different from the previous one. Louisa was at her house, with no other thoughts than her family. She continued studying throughout the period, postponing courses only for the last two months.
She was able to lean on her husband right away and this time she did it without hesitation. She no longer wanted to prove anything to anyone and her ambitions of sterile independence were a distant memory.
Carrying their son surrounded by Martin's love and care made those months enchanting. She listened to his advice and gratefully accepted all of his help. The atmosphere in the house was pleasant and relaxed.
Little James received the news with initial distrust, but she involved him as much as possible, talking to him about how important it would be to be a big brother, how he would have a new playmate and reminding him that his mum and dad didn't they had been that lucky. She reassured him that he would never miss their love and the child calmed down.
Martin went back to working in the clinic as if nothing had happened. Every morning he got up early and prepared breakfast. In the first few months he allowed Louisa to prepare at least lunch, then... when he noticed that she was starting to get tired quickly and struggle... he took care of that as well as dinner.
He hung and picked up the laundry, washed the dishes, swept and dusted. Whatever she held in her hand of any weight, he would come and take it away from her. He accompanied her shopping to carry her bags and he had Morwenna organize appointments so that he could accompany her and pick her up in the car from her courses.
He realized that he enjoyed taking care of her, especially now. She was carrying his child in her womb and that awareness of it almost made him move. He was satisfied that he could help her and pleasantly surprised that she allowed him to do so.
It no longer bothered him to be a general practitioner. He greatly loved arriving in the kitchen at lunchtime and finding a smiling Louisa inviting him to sit down or start cooking while she talked to him about anything and everything.
Of course, bickering still happened... misunderstandings too... but they dealt with those situations differently. Feeling sure of the other's love made the difference and what wasn't said... was demonstrated.
Martin was not only helpful in practical matters. Sometimes she caught him staring in fascination at her and her big belly. He often asked her what she felt... how it made her feel like a life was growing inside her. When the baby moved, she took his hand and placed it on her belly so he could feel it too. At first he let herto do, hesitant, then he learned to support her on his own and to wander over that roundness of hers with a hint of a smile.
He was very patient when Louisa seemed overwhelmed by hormones and never stopped looking for her, even though she felt as attractive as a beached whale. Whatever she needed, he was there.
Since Martin accompanied her to all the check-ups, they decided to ask the sex of the unborn child. He would have noticed it during the ultrasound anyway and it made no sense that he was forced to keep it a secret. So they discovered that she was a girl and, as happy as they would have been even if it had been a boy, they were both satisfied.
A few times they also took advantage of the ultrasound in the clinic to observe the little girl grow. Every now and then before going to sleep, Louisa asked Martin to bring the Doppler ultrasound into the room to listen to the beats of that little heart beating inside her. He liked it too… his eyes immediately softened and the corners of his mouth lifted.
Some time after the decision to stay married, Martin began to feel confident enough to return the kisses Louisa gave him on the cheek in the morning before going out or in other situations. Even when they weren't alone he responded naturally. During that period his confidence increased, to the point that he was often the one to look for her. Making sure no one was there… he came closer, he slid his hand behind her waist and leaned down to kiss her tenderly on her mouth.
Louisa welcomed these small changes in his attitude and encouraged them discreetly.
In that serene and loving climate, Mary Elisabeth was born on a bright spring morning.
It was a much less eventful birth than the previous one. They arrived at Truro hospital while it was still dark and at the crack of dawn the baby was born.
Shortly after…in the room…as soon as Martin took his daughter in his arms, he fell in love with her. Louisa noticed his expression soften immediately… he was enchanted.
He looked at his wife with shining eyes.
"Thank you." he whispered excitedly.
«I'd say it's also thanks to you…»
"My share was negligible."
She held out her arms for him to sit on the bed next to her and hugged them both.
«Your part was fundamental, Martin. You have been thoughtful and patient with me and have made these months so much easier. I will always remember this time and how wonderful you made it." as she spoke, she gently stroked the hair on the back of his neck.
He looked at the little girl, then at his wife.
"I love you, Louisa."
She gave him a kiss...tired, but happy.
"I love you too. Much." and she kissed him again.
Martin stayed with them a little longer, but they needed to rest and he soon left. He returned in the early afternoon with James and Ruth, carrying a bouquet of beautiful red roses.
Louisa was beaming and he felt…happy.
Mary Elisabeth was a quiet child and did not force her parents into sleepless nights. A few days after her birth, her grandmother came to Portwenn to meet her and stayed for a month. Louisa was pleased. Eleanor helped her with James and allowed her to rest to recover from the birth. She behaved very well and did not create a disturbance. Even Martin had nothing to say about her, on the contrary... he appreciated that she relieved his wife of some tasks while he worked. After their last vacation in Villaricos, they had found a way to get along...or at least respect each other.
Shortly after her mother left…with a promise to return as soon as possible…Louisa began studying again. Without school work, it was much easier to manage the children and the classes. Furthermore, Martin continued to be a great support to her.
One afternoon she returned home a little earlier than expected. She obviously hadn't made much noise or her husband was distracted... but when she looked into the living room, she saw him intent on changing Mary. He had his back to her and hadn't heard her.
When he was finished, Martin lifted his daughter in front of him.
«When you are older, you will have to have patience with your dad...» he said to the little girl who was observing him carefully.
«I'm afraid I'll end up all the boys who try to get close to you... but don't get too angry with me.» he continued. «When you have met your Prince Charming, I will step aside and allow you to go out…sometimes…as long as he doesn't touch you…but we'll talk about it again when you're forty…» he concluded satisfied and to Louisa it seemed like a very tender speech.
Mary gave him a beautiful smile as she wiggled happily. Her father sighed.
"You already learned the trick from your mother to make me do anything, right?" he commented resignedly and gently touched her small forehead to his.
Louisa cleared her throat and he whirled around.
«So you discovered my trick…» she commented with feigned nonchalance.
«From the first moment…but I have never been able to escape the charm of your smiles.» he confessed with a slight smile.
When she saw her mother, Mary stretched out her little arms towards her, smiling at her and, when she picked her up, the little girl turned to touch her father's hand too...five very small and perfect fingers stretched out towards the big and strong ones, sliding into the palm that welcomed them and squeezed them delicately.
Martin felt his heart melt. He leaned closer and hugged Louisa's waist, kissing Mary on the top of her head. He would never have dared to hope that life could hold such perfect moments for him.
«Forty years you said…»
«Well…at least.»
"If my father had done as you did, there wouldn't be an Ellingham family today..."
«…but I'm not him.»
Louisa was very grateful to Martin for giving her more time for the children. She understood that his insistence that she quit her job when it came to James had absolutely not been an attempt to lock her in or dampen her ambitions. As a child who had been ignored, he had perceived that his son would suffer from an early separation from his mother. Unfortunately she had entrenched herself behind an alleged feminism and had claimed her independence rights... she, on the other hand, would have been able to enjoy the first years of her son for longer than that.
It was a relief not to have to leave little Mary with a babysitter all day or in daycare. She only called Janice when she was attending a class and Martin was busy visiting, otherwise she always took her with her wherever she went. When she studied… usually at the kitchen table… she kept her in her crib next to her. With one hand he scribbled notes... with the other she caressed her tummy... and if it was time for her to feed, he simply held her close to her chest, without the need for annoying breast pumps.
It happened that Martin would arrive to make a coffee and he seemed to have overcome the discomfort of seeing her breastfeeding... less so of finding the table covered with books and notebooks. When Mary was hungry at night, many times he too would get up and stare enchanted at her baby and mother.
Louisa finally finished the course, with excellent grades.
A couple of months earlier, Martin had the idea of organizing a lunch to celebrate her...she would certainly have appreciated it...and he talked about it with Ruth for advice.
His aunt approved and praised his initiative, suggesting he also think about a small gift... which kept him busy in his search.
On the day of his graduation, Martin took his family to eat at the restaurant where the two of them had met. He also invited Ruth, Chris and his wife and Pippa with her husband.
Back in town, they exchanged a knowing glance at each other in the parking lot and his aunt took the children into the house.
"Wait, Louisa."
"What's going on, Martin?"
She looked at him with a wide smile and he swallowed, suddenly self-conscious.
«I…I have a gift for you.» he confessed all in one breath.
"A gift? But...you've already given me this splendid lunch...and the flowers..."
«Uhmm…yes, that is…no. That was a celebration…but I also had a gift.»
She peered at him, tilting her head to the side. Her husband had retained his edgy character… especially with others… but he was still capable of surprising her.
"Come." he held out his arm to her and she held on, clinging to him.
They went up Roscarrock Hill for a short distance, to a clearing that opened up on their left. Martin led her across a low wall…finding himself in front of the large Victorian house next to their cottage…he pulled some keys from his pocket and unlocked the door.
"Enter." he invited her with a wave of his hand.
Stunned…Louisa obeyed. She looked around the hallway, wondering if it was really possible for her to realize her suspicion.
"Martin?" she just couldn't wait any longer.
«Yes…here…the gift would be this…»
She looked at him with her mouth open... shocked... her eyes widening.
He wasn't yet good at interpreting her expressions. Suddenly he had the feeling that he had done something wrong and that the idea of it didn't appeal to her at all.
«Well… if that's okay with you… I visited some properties for sale in the area… I didn't want to decide on my own… I didn't intend to, but… I just wanted it to be a surprise… yes… gifts should be surprises…» he stammered nervously . She still didn't speak and his mouth felt suddenly dry… he was definitely making one of his messes and he cursed himself for not thinking about it better.
«Obviously you are free to refuse…I agree with the real estate agent that your approval is needed first…we can have other homes shown…then you will decide.» he swallowed hard.
"Are you saying that the gift for finishing my course is this house?" she asked slowly.
«Y...Yes.» he whispered, resigned to failure, but his wife's face broke into a radiant smile. She threw her arms around his neck and held onto him tightly.
«I can't believe it, Martin... lunch with our friends was enough... and the bouquet of flowers... this is... too much.»
Relieved, he hugged her back.
"No it is not. I wanted to give you a gift... Ruth actually suggested the idea to me... you know I'm not familiar with these things... so a new and more spacious house seemed the most useful to me.»
"Can we really afford a place like this?"
"Yes, absolutely. We will sell the practice to cover part of the price and the rest…well, I told you I made very good investments."
"Are you sure? We would move a few meters, but it would still be a change... won't it be too much for you? And where will you visit if we sell the practice?" the idea of a house bigger thrilled her, but the move would involve their entire family and their work... so it was essential that her husband was also convinced of it.
«Well...for one thing, the ceilings here are higher and I won't risk a head injury with every step like it usually happens at the cottage...and yes, I don't mind the idea of having more space. The children will grow up and everyone will be able to have their own bedroom. The view doesn't change much, but the patio, even if narrow, will be private... and we could think about raising the wall onto the street and filling the cavity with more soil. We would create a small garden where James and Mary could play... there could be a gazebo with a table... and the space could easily accommodate two cars... probably more... what is there?»
Louisa looked at him tenderly.
«Nothing…just…I love you.»
He bent down to kiss her.
"I love you too." he replied shyly. "Come, I'll show you how it's willing."
Louisa followed him and took his hand, intertwining her fingers with his.
In front of them, stairs led to the upper floor, while two corridors opened to the right and left.
«The two areas are mirror images and I thought we could reserve this wing for the clinic. Enter." he waved her through.
«At the end there is a small veranda, which could be the entrance, so we would have our own private front door. On the left there is a kitchen... we could knock down the wall, put in a desk and make it the waiting room. Right here is a small bathroom." he opened the door revealing a sink and toilet.
«On this side there are two living areas and I see them as perfect for our studies… you can choose th…»
"Martin!" she interrupted him in amazement. "Our studies?"
"Yes. The surgery for patients and an office for your…clients.» he explained as if it were obvious. "I think it won't be a problem for Morwenna to handle both."
«Martin…» she grabbed his neck to pull him down and kiss him, then opened all the doors to explore the rooms. When she was done, she returned to him.
"And will I also be able to have a name tag outside the door?" she asked him thrilled.
"Yes of course. As for the connection to the house, we can keep this door…perhaps keeping it locked on this side…or we can wall it up.»
«Maybe keeping the door would be more convenient... especially in winter. Only the two of us will have the keys and that part will remain private." she reassured him knowing how much he cared.
"Yes, OK. Now… over here, instead… »he invited her to go to the other wing with a gesture. «…we can keep the original layout…so we have a small bathroom, a sufficiently spacious kitchen, a living room and a dining room. In this case we could think of uniting the last two and making them a single area, recovering more space from the corridor that would no longer be needed.»
«Yes, perhaps making it a single area could be more practical and also nicer.» Martin's ideas seemed decidedly interesting to her. She explored everything and imagined a beautiful modern kitchen.
"It's pretty much the same view, but it's much better from these big windows, don't you think?" she asked him joyfully.
«Um…yes. It goes upstairs."
They climbed the carpeted stairs and reached two more hallways.
«On both sides there are two rooms and a bathroom... we could join two of them and make a large one for us with a bathroom... or keep one for guests... while James and Mary would each have their own with a shared bathroom ..."
He hadn't finished the explanation before Louisa was already inside and was commenting cheerfully.
«It's definitely bigger than the one we have… there's a tub… and also a spacious shower…» she turned to look at him mischievously. «…it can fit easily in two…»
Martin lowered his face to the side and cleared his throat.
"Certain." he replied softly… he was still embarrassed and she smiled.
They returned to the ground floor.
«The electrical system was recently redone and absolutely up to standard and the pipes are also in order. The windows and doors are good and the roof is solid." Martin added in a professional tone.
«But it's empty… we can recover some of our furniture, but this one is much bigger…»s he told herself that the costs would be considerable.
«I have already budgeted for the new furniture, don't worry and... you will be able to choose the colors of the walls and the furniture.»
She looked at him, struck by how conciliatory he was. She was silent for a moment thinking about how perfect her life was. She was certain that it would not have been without Martin… he had become her support and her companion.
"Obviously you are free to say no if you don't like it and we ask the agent to visit others." he concluded.
Louisa sighed, still in disbelief.
«It's a really nice house and has the advantage that we'll be moving within walking distance. I like it, but…could we see more? Just so there's no doubt... do you mind?"
«No, of course. I'll call the agent tomorrow morning."
She smiled and hugged him.
"Thank you, Martin." she whispered against his neck. "It was a wonderful day, my love."
"Well." he said softly. If she was happy…he was happy.
That evening... in the room... when they turned off the lamps, Louisa snuggled up on Martin's chest, who put his arm around her, caressing her shoulder.
«I'm not sleepy…I'm so happy about…everything.» she smacked a kiss on his cheek. «The pregnancy went well, you got your job back, I finished the course… the children are fine… even my mother came to help me…»
He turned to kiss her forehead…he loved listening to her when she was so enthusiastic.
«…and now we will have a new house and I will have a new job.»
"Are you happy?"
«Yes, Martin. I am happy."
"Well." it was all he wanted.
«I'm not just happy…I…I'm also so grateful for everything you've done for me…» she hugged him tighter, hiding her face against his chest.
"I thought the independence I always prided myself on was all that mattered… I didn't want to need anyone for any reason… with my fear of abandonment."
Martin touched her hair and shoulder in silence.
"Then you came into my life…and it was…shocking…" she smiled «…complicated…but I could always count on you. In the last few months I have finally allowed you to help me…to be by my side…and it has been wonderful to be able to count on you…in everything. Waiting for Mary was relaxing…I loved every moment."
«Well… it seems like the least… it was you who had the hardest part, after all.» he held her a little tighter, remembering how she held her aching back at the end of the pregnancy, the swollen feet, the awkward posture and the labor... those must have been terrible... he felt great respect for what she had endured to give to the birth to their two children.
«I hope I wasn't too unbearable, Martin…»
«Uhmm…no…not too much.» there seemed to be irony in his voice and Louisa laughed.
"Sorry." she leaned up to kiss him on the mouth and watch his face in the dim light. She could see the twinkle in his eyes.
"You have nothing to apologize for." he whispered. «Rather… I'm the one who needs to apologize again for not taking care of you in the same way when you were waiting for James.» his tone saddened.
«We've already talked about it…I've done my part to complicate things too…I've been insecure and grumpy with you…and I waited too long to tell you…so…we both did our worst, but…we made up for it with Mary .»
She put a hand on his cheek.
"I love the life you gave me, Martin…and I love the man you are."
"Do you?" His voice became so sweet and velvety that Louisa felt herself melt. "Even if I'm full of flaws?"
"Yes." she whispered, bringing her face closer to his. «And you...do you love me even if I'm full of defects too?»
Martin placed his hand on her face looking at her solemnly.
"Yes. I love you exactly as you are."
She smiled as they stared into each other's eyes lit only by the reflection of the moon from the window.
«I know that happiness is an overrated concept for you, but…are you at least a little happy too?» she really hoped that her husband could feel the same emotions as her one day.
He took her hand and brought it to his chest. He sighed searching for isr words.
«I…I'm not sure what this happiness is…but I know that I have never felt so good in my entire life. Everything I do makes sense because you are there, so… I think I'm happy, yes.»
She felt tears prickling her eyes as she listened to her husband's heart beat strong and steady beneath her palm.
"Well." she whispered, then she kissed him softly, overcome with emotion.
They visited a few other properties, but ultimately decided that the first one was the best. They hired a company to carry out the alterations they had planned, put the cottage up for sale and after four months moved into the new house.
Martin made sure that the main entrance and that of the studies were independent by placing a gate at the beginning of the patio, so that patients could only access through the designated door, without wandering in front of the windows.
Louisa preferred to take care of her appointments alone, so as to manage her time around the children and leave them only when was necessary to Janice. She liked her new job and did it with passion, but she was firmly determined to give priority to the needs of her family.
James was happy to have a room all to himself and, thanks to his parents' attention, he soon overcame his jealousy towards his little sister. He grew up very much like her father in appearance, but Martin saw many of Louisa's personality traits in him and thought it would be good for his son, especially as he had started school.
Mary, however, to her father's relief, looked a lot like his wife. She continued to be a calm and smiling child, but Louisa already noticed Martin's determination in her.
Their life passed peacefully between family, work, some squabbles and Martin's lively attempts to better adapt to the village and its inhabitants... at least until... on a drizzly afternoon in early spring... Margaret Ellingham showed up at their door.
