Chapter 24:
Jake Jr. shot to wakefulness, barely choking back a scream. Last night's dream had been truly awful. She'd seen the whole thing—from the moment she jumped Finn and got knocked-up, to the moment their daughter murdered him.
Shaking off the terror, the shapechanger slipped out of bed. Gathering on her slippers, she went out to the kitchen. Her kids would be up soon. She intended to send them off to work with breakfast in their tummies and a nice lunch to eat at work.
Just like their time in the Jungle Kingdom, the smell of food cooking soon had Simone and Liz out of bed and crowding her space. "Mmmm," sighed Liz. "Kimchi pancakes! Omurice! They smell so good!"
Shooing them to the table, JJ began plating their breakfasts. Liz was all but dancing in her seat, when Jake Jr. approached. "Here you go, baby," the older woman murmured, as she lay the plate before her daughter. Laying a plate before Simone, she kissed both young women on their cheeks before settling before them.
Moments like this, Simone saw her mother's love. While the food the three sisters got was always first class, the food the older woman typically cooked for herself was plain to the point of being bland—as if she didn't care if she lived or died.
The older woman was silent through breakfast, though Liz was happy to fill the void. She had endless topics to talk about, including the news that she was now privileged to work in the private rooms in the back of the restaurant.
"I'm not sure that's a good idea," Simone rumbled. Frowning, Liz responded, "but that's where the good money is! Tara's making bank back there!"
"Tara's a whore," Simone retorted. "She makes extra money sucking dicks and giving tit-jobs. With the way you look, dirty old men will be expecting you to do the same." Liz, who as far as Simone knew was still a virgin, blushed to the roots of her hair.
Her eyes flicked to their mother. "You're grown," Jake Jr. sighed. "I can't control what you do with your life, but I want you to think about what that did to your aunt..."
As Simone listened in horror, her mother talked about what aunt Viola had to do to get parts in videos and plays over the years of her life and the distressing effects that life had on her. "You're a princess," their mother reminded them. "You... you don't get to be reckless the way we were."
Reaching out, she stroked her child's face and said, "don't give away your treasure to some shitbag for a few coins..." Simone flushed to her hair. She'd lost her virginity in a seedy hotel. At the time, she'd been madly in love. Later, she'd come to the unhappy realization that the man she'd been so randy for moved on after barely a few weeks.
Glancing at the clock, Simone said, "get showered, Liz. We need to get to work." "Oh, shit," Liz burbled. Shooting to her feet, she dashed into the toilet. In short order, they could hear the shower going.
Rising, Simone moved to her sister's closet and laid out a clean uniform. They needed to do laundry, but fortunately their shift ended early today. Returning to the living room, she found her mother listlessly washing dishes. This also reminded Simone of the old days of their apartment, just not in a good way.
"Something's bothering you," Simone murmured. When her mother's face swivelled towards hers, she remarked, "I thought you were turning over a new leaf."
JJ responded, "it's nothing like that. I have a pardon. I don't do crime or hurt people for money." "Then what is it," Simone insisted? Blowing out a breath, JJ said, "I'm not even sure how to tell you this..." Twirling a lock of her long, pale hair, the taller woman suggested, "why don't you just tell me. My sister's a water-hog, but she won't stay in there forever..."
"You're going to have siblings, Simone," JJ declared. The tall girl's eyes went wide. Defensively, Jake muttered, "I... had a dream of prophecy. Your aunt confirmed it." Flushing, Simone responded, "it's not that... I just... I didn't know you were dating."
"It's your grandfather," Jake sighed. "I'm dating your grampa." Simone slugged her in the arm, declaring, "mom! That's... that's gross!" "It is what it is," Jake sighed. Blowing out a breath, she added, "it's a prophecy..."
Frowning, the tall girl muttered, "that isn't what's bothering you, is it...?" "Your half-sister is going to murder her dad," Jake sighed, "unless I can figure out how to fix it..."
Simone sat herself in a rush and for a long while, the pair stared at each other. Finally, Simone burbled, "no wonder you're having nightmares."
Frowning, she added, "why?" Her mother stared at her in puzzlement. "Why would my sister kill her father," Simone asked? "Because she's going to get a big dose of me, Simone," Jake Jr. sighed.
"W-worse than Liz," Simone burbled? Nodding in confirmation, her mother admitted, "she... takes a bribe from some pretty awful people to murder him, but she's... it's really just for the kicks... Like I used to be."
Just then, Liz came out of the bathroom and immediately ducked into her room. "You need to think about how to fix this, momma," Simone whispered. Rising, she slipped into the bathroom and went straight into the shower.
Twenty minutes later, the two sisters were headed down the street, bound for the bus stop, leaving JJ alone in their apartment. Long after the pair had gone, Jake Jr. sat staring into space. Finally, gathering her courage, the shapechanger picked up her phone.
"Hi, Vi," Jake Jr. murmured. "I'd... I know I haven't called. I... I want to see you and Charlie. It's... It's urgent. Yeah, today, if we could, please. Right. See you then."
On the far side of the ocean, Fionna slipped her phone back in her pocket, her lovely face contorted in an uncharacteristic look of irritation. For as long as Shoko could remember, happy-go-lucky Fionna Mertens rarely if ever looked so much as annoyed. Like her father, she just rolled through life, with zero fucks to give. The look on her face suggested she was ready to belt somebody, and that somebody might be the woman who'd insisted on accompanying her on this journey.
As Shoko pondered that, the witch's phone began to ring. And ring. And ring some more. The minute the ringing stopped, it started all over again. Ignoring it, the witch put the thing on vibrate.
"Answer the phone, M's," Fionna muttered. The witch glared at her, her expression saying that she didn't want to deal with the problem that the phone represented. Fionna made it clear that she really didn't give a flip whether Maja wanted to deal with the problem by the simple expedient of glaring back.
Striding across the little clearing, Fionna growled, "Answer. The. Phone." The Bad Bunny's expression suggested that the Skywitch would regret it, if she didn't. Blowing out a breath, Maja took out her phone and opened it. "Go," she muttered.
Shoko could hear Drew's voice in the background. "Yes," Maja responded. "Yes..." Twirling a lock of her hair nervously, the witch burbled, "no. No, Drew, it's not like that. It's... You realize they were on an evolutionary dead-end path, yes?"
Shaking her head, the witch said, "they were falling below the cranial size and mass necessary to sustain intelligence... This... I think it might be a side-effect. Right. Keep me posted. I think she can be ok, but she's to get good bed rest. We'll talk. Right. Bye."
The witch wore a hang-dog expression, as she slipped her phone into her purse. Fionna hugged her. Stroking her long, black hair, the younger woman murmured, "you can't help being what you were made to be, but you can heal and maybe get a little better."
Stepping back, the leggy blonde turned to the mountain before them, saying, "ok. I'll be back in a few minutes."
On the far side of the sea, Drusilla Princess-Mertens put down her phone. "And," Hurletta demanded? "It's a side-effect," Drew responded. "Maja thinks it may be unique to Blargetha." "How so," asked Bonnie?
The tall doctor began far off the topic, explaining just how it was that Maja had managed to change the slime folk into a race of humanoids. Minerva whistled in amazement. "I kinda' wish we could take her apart to see how she does that," the AI burbled. "I know, right," Bonnie agreed.
Drew goggled at the pair. That was horrific! "We're not really thinking of taking my son's wife apart, Drusilla," Minerva chuckled. "It's just a thought exercise..." "Thought exercise," muttered Drew, with a shake of her head. "Right."
Moving on, the curvy doctor walked through the preliminary conclusions that Maja had shared with her on the phone, explaining, "the slime folk were in danger of regressing to the point where they lost their sentience and reverted to animal intelligence..."
Hurletta's jaw came open in shock and horror. There had been times she'd fiercely wanted to butcher Maja as much if not more than her sister. It had been Maja's magic that made it possible for a pack of savages to assault her, after all. At the same time, she'd developed this fabulous humanoid body, enabling her to seduce Finn, there had been moments she would've gladly gone back to where things were.
"We... would've... we would've died out," she burbled. In soothing tones, Drew responded, "generations from now..." "It doesn't matter if it wasn't on my watch," 'Letta howled! "She... she actually saved us..."
"She wanted an army, 'Letta," Bonnie reminded her. "It doesn't fucking matter, Bonnie," 'Letta retorted! "We would've been gone in a few generations! My people would've ended! I... I actually have to thank her for saving us."
Minerva murmured, "wasn't Blargetha a genius before the change?" She was dragging them back to the subject at hand. Frowning, Bonnie nodded, "yes. Blargetha was an oddity for her people." "It's why my sister never fit in," 'Letta agreed.
"I think your sister was already a genetic outlier, Your Highness," Minerva burbled, "with an outsized brain. The change expanded her brain capacity and may have triggered a chemical imbalance."
Frowning, 'Letta admitted, "she's been working a lot. Morning noon and night, she's in that lab, and she's always scribbling at a notepad." Glancing over at her sister's room, the slime princess added, "she... she once told me that she felt like her mind was overloaded with ideas. She couldn't get it all written down fast enough."
Nodding, Bonnie said, "yeah... I think what we're dealing with is a literal brain storm. I think this has been building for a while... probably since the change."
"W-what do we do," Hurletta asked? She sounded panicked. It was a strange change for a woman who had been abused by the individual in question. Family, Drew, the doctor thought. Blargetha may be a dirtbag, but she's 'Letta's only real family.
Resting a hand on 'Letta's shoulder, Minerva responded, "it's just a seizure, 'Letta. There are medications that we can use to help her. Once we get something whipped up that's suitable, she can go back to her normal life."
"What about the man-rated rocket," Bonnie asked? "I think we're in good shape," Minerva responded. "The cure for the neurotoxin's being synthesized at scale now. Your uncle's abandoned hot-shop's been cleaned up. Blargetha's already done the largest piece of the work. I can drag this across the finish line."
"Because that's all that really matters," Hurletta muttered. Pulling on her 'hair', the plump princess muttered curses under her breath. Turning towards her, Minerva saw real distress. "I'm sorry, Hurletta," the AI murmured. "I'm not good with emotions. I think I lost things inside the machine that I won't ever get back. This is your family, and I understand why this bothers you..."
Now the slime princess directed her curses at Finn's mom, only realizing what she'd done after the words got said. Smiling, Min responded, "the good thing about sort of losing a lot of my emotions is that I'm not upset, 'Letta. Your venting your pain and worry over your sister doesn't bother me."
Resting a hand on 'Letta's shoulder, the older woman said, "rest assured we're going to get her fixed, 'Letta. She's part of this family, after all." Hurletta's eyes got big as plates, and she grabbed at her hair again. "W-what're we telling Finn," she howled?!
"We're not," Bonnie responded. "Though I could make use of this to get his butt back here sooner, I'm... That isn't a good way to do business. Blargetha's sleeping, so she's not in any danger of another seizure right now. Unless there's a change, I see no need to get him worked up."
Elsewhere, Finn the King glanced up from his conversation with the crew of the airship to find a hungover Talia wobbling down the ramp. The sight of her was a little shocking, as he'd only served her wine the previous night. You didn't check her bags, Finn, he thought.
Coolly, he greeted her with, "thanks for joining us." Offering him a frown, she slurred, "I can get up when I want to..." "Sure," Finn replied, "but you might find you miss things..." "...like the breakfast he made in your honor," Katsumi rumbled.
The witch's face went red hot, as she took in the sight of the table, with its picked-over contents. Striding forward, Finn said, "let's get you a shower, while I make something for that hangover."
Katsumi was waiting at the table, looking somewhere between worried and irritated, when Finn returned with the hangover remedy. "She's limping," the kitsune remarked. "Why would she be limping?"
"Either her knees or ankles are hurting," the King retorted, as he sat himself. Almost as if he dealt with a dying person every day, the big man opined, "she's self-medicating. That's what Drew would call it."
The Nine-Tailed Fox spun to face him. "Cherry's aunt smokes low-grade wacky licorice to dull the pain in her knees," Finn remarked. "Arthritis," Katsumi muttered. She stared at him. "It's only been a year," she growled.
He could see what she thought. You didn't go from hale and hearty to broken down in so short a time.
"I don't know how much about magic," Finn admitted. "My father-in-law was a thousand years old. Just taking the Ice-Crown from him would've caused him to die overnight... maybe even within hours. It took a wish to separate him from the Crown without killing him."
Those words seemed to strike the Nine-Tailed Fox like a thunderbolt. The change in her expression was painful to look at. Finn imagined himself looking something like that if anything were to ever happen to Jake, Simone, or his mom. He just didn't know what to do about it.
Rising, Finn moved on. He didn't really have time to be here in the first place, so he had no time to deal with Katsumi's emotions. Cornering the leader of the cyborgs, the big man laid out what he'd found in Talia's apartment and what needed to be done. By the time Talia had returned, the crew of cyborgs had headed off into town, bound for the forgotten tenement she called home.
"Where is everybody," the rusalka burbled, as she strolled up? As he handed her the hangover remedy, Finn responded, "gone to deal with the mold. They'll clean your place... clean up all your stuff..." "W-what does that mean," the witch demanded?
"Everything," Katsumi muttered. "Right down to the panties in your underwear drawer. It all has to be cleaned, or the mold will just come back. Be grateful. We had to basically bleach my grandmother's house. It reeked of chlorine for a month. I'm sure those guys have something more pleasant to use."
Drawing out a chair, Finn said, "it's almost lunch. You can have that... what is it...?" "Brunch," Katsumi announced. "It's called brunch." "Yeah," Finn agreed. "That."
As afternoon approached in the Candy Kingdom, Jake Junior slipped into a seat in the lobby of the Randolf hotel, site of many a secret sit-down amongst the Candy Kingdom's gangsters. The feel of the bench's creamy nauga-leather under her butt brought back memories both pleasant and unpleasant.
Billy had taken her cherry in a room upstairs. Like everything in her life, the moment had been unplanned, and she'd spent a week in terror that she was pregnant until her period came.
At the time, though, she'd gotten filled out like a checkbook. The sweet release of her first time had been all that really mattered. He'd gone back for seconds and thirds, and she hadn't objected in the slightest. When the thing with the Blue and Reds had gotten settled, she'd brought Billy back here for a celebration, though he'd had no idea at the time that he'd essentially done Cherry's dirty work.
"It's the past," she murmured. "Why do I still want to think about those moments?" Truth? When she was with her daughters, the moments with Billy weren't very far from her mind. Unfortunately, that chapter of her life was closed. She'd closed it herself. So protect what you've got now, she thought.
Finn's trip east was fortuitous, since it allowed her to do some things he wouldn't necessarily approve of without risking blowing things up with her second chance at happiness. As she waited in the hotel lobby for her sisters, she couldn't help reflecting on that.
How much of this was going on under Finn's nose? She couldn't really be alone. He was married to over a dozen princesses, all of whom had their own agendas. If that weren't enough, some of his mistresses were princesses too.
Cherry was still lord of the underworld–Boss of Bosses, making it a certainty that she dabbled in ugly things when Finn's back was turned. Bonnie had her habit of running risky experiments that sometimes threatened the world.
Orzsebet was The Spy. Even her secrets had secrets. Even Bronwyn wasn't really immune, was she? She'd done her daddy's dirty-work for years behind the scenes, hiding the dirt under a beautiful facade.
If there were really so many people in the family doing dirt behind the scenes, was this little thing that she was about to do so bad? Given the reasons she was going to do this, she hardly thought she could be blamed for going off the reservation.
While she was stewing, her sisters came in, chatting amiably. Did she look back on their time together in their mom's house, that had more or less always been the case.
Charlie and Vi spent their time together doing the things young girls so often did—chatting about makeup, clothing, and boys. As they grew older, that turned into careers on the stage and in physical fitness.
Kim had his ambitions and his businesses. He'd been the first of them to move out, with their mom's blessing.
TV had been as much a loaner as Jake and maybe just a touch stranger. He'd been socially awkward, more accustomed to dealing with the little computer their father had gotten from Princess Bubblegum than with real people. Still, he'd had their mom. And Jake Jr. herself? She'd been the loneliest of all.
Rising, she greeted her sisters with, "hey..." "Jr.," Viola responded. "What's up, sis," Charlie added? "Not here," Jake responded. Cocking her head towards the restaurant, she said, "I got a private room in back."
Not long ago, Viola would've suspected a trick. Either Junior was out to con them into paying for the meal and private room, or she was going to try sucking them into some scam she was running.
In the right now, with Jake doing double-duty as Finn's bodyguard and sometime girlfriend, she should clearly have the money to pay. The question was 'why'. They'd been estranged for years, even before the incident with Billy, so why did Jake Jr. want to see them now? Nothing for it, but to find out, thought the actress.
Gesturing for her sister to lead on, Viola fell in behind Jake Jr., wondering, as she did, what kind of madness her sister was going to spring on them.
The head waiter practically swooped down on them, telling Viola that cash money was involved. Usually, in a place like this, if you hadn't paid up in advance, they looked down their noses at you unless they knew you.
"Expense accounts are pretty useful," Jake Jr. declared as the trio followed the waitress to the back of the restaurant. Spending Finn's money, instead of ours, Viola thought. Some things just don't change, do they?
The waitress immediately brought them menus and water before leaving them alone in their private room. "Haven't been in too many of these," Charlie remarked.
Flipping pages in the menu, Viola sighed, "been to too many it seems." She was jaded. The decor was well made but somewhat plain. The stain on the furniture was a little too dark, making the room seem dark as well. It seemed more suited to someplace a spy might meet with her clients than somewhere cheery to have lunch with friends and relatives.
"Order what you like," Jake announced. Of course, thought Viola. Finn's paying for it. Shaking off her irritation at having her sister take advantage like that, Viola ordered up a modest lunch. She was calorie-counting these days.
Small talk filled the time, while they waited on lunch to be brought. Charlie talked of what was going on with TV, while Viola talked of her project with the Army of Ooo. Jake, as always, was quiet as a mouse, as if all the secrets of the world might spill out if she spoke once.
When the waitress had gone, Jake rose and checked the door, telling Viola that this wasn't some innocent meeting, just as she'd guessed. Settling in her chair once more, Jake Jr. announced, "I would like to go to the Dark Maze and gain a wish for our mother."
Charlie stared at Jake, as if she hadn't quite heard that right. Viola's blue eyes narrowed. She couldn't have heard that right.
Clearing her throat, Jake explained, "ma... ma took it hard, when daddy moved out. She's... She just stays in that house, moping. Nobody looks in on her. I'd... I kinda' wanted to help her get dates again... You know, so she'd have somebody there with her."
Silence reigned, when Jr. finished that exposition. The fact that she wouldn't look them in the eyes told that she realized just how idiotic that suggestion sounded.
Just to drive the point home, Charlie growled, "that's the most mopheaded idea I've heard in forever." Piling on, Viola muttered, "we're all, collectively, fighting against the results of a wish gone awry, and you want to throw fuel on the fire by making a wish too!"
"B-but," Jake Jr. babbled. "I... If we do it right, it's ok..." Charlie opined, "it's not the idea of wishing that I have a problem with. It's the problem of why."
Glaring at Jake, the plush pretty said, "you managed to claw your way out of hock with the Finn side of our family, sis. Against all the odds, you're not only off Finn's shit-list, but you're actually his girlfriend. Now you want to fuck that up for something frivolous. I don't get you."
Shaking her head, Viola added, "I'm just as tired as everybody else of seeing our mother moping around, pining after dad, but I don't see this as a reason to dare the Wishmaster's Vengeance."
Nodding, Charlie agreed, "I'm so close to getting my baby, I can almost see his face. Why the fuck would I want to do something so stupid right now?!"
Well, thought Jake Jr. This is going just about as well as I figured it would. Neither of her sisters was really interested in this, Charlie least of all, though it was Charlie's help that she needed the most.
Time to come clean, thought Jake. Glancing up into her sisters' irritated faces, she admitted, "I have an ulterior motive."
Rolling her eyes, Vi remarked, "real shocker, there." "No, listen," Junior pleaded. "I'm waiting," Charlie muttered. With a sigh, Junior said, "I'm... I'm more alien than you are."
Glancing up at her sisters, the shapeshifter said, "Dr. Princess explained it once. She said that your genes move around when you have babies. She said nobody ever ends up really being one-half this or one-quarter that. It's... somewhere in the middle. I'm... I probably got a big dose of monster-genes from dad."
Charlie gave her an expectant look, suggesting that she wasn't moved. Viola's expression was neutral, suggesting she saw where this was going. Blowing out a breath, Jake explained, "I lucked out with my first pups. I... rolled the dice, and though they got a lot of my bad parts, Simone, Lady, and Liz turned out ok. I won't dump a batch of bad kids on Finn. I won't do it."
Taking another deep breath, she announced, "I... need a wish—to make my kids turn out ok." "That isn't it," Charlie retorted. "You're holding back..."
Jake felt the heat come to her face. She'd become really bad at lying since she'd gone on meds. Somehow, the old her—the messed-up Jake—could lie like, well, a dog, and never get caught out. "My daughter," Jake murmured. "Finn's daughter... Finn's daughter is going to murder him. I... saw it."
"You can't change prophecy," Charlie snapped! "I have to try," Jake retorted. "Anyways, I don't need you to make a wish for me... I need help to get through the maze. You got an iron in this fire too, sis. Finn's still carrying the Quicksilver Curse. Your kids are at risk too."
Nodding as the color left Charlie's face, Junior said, "Simone checks out his kids for traces of it. She even checks out his grand kids too."
Both sisters looked absolutely terrified. They'd heard little bits and pieces of what had gone on with the Curse—how it had eaten Fionna's heart and nearly killed Finn twice. More to the point, they'd heard rumblings that mothers weren't immune. If you were pregnant with a child who'd inherited the curse, you'd feel the effects too.
Trying to sound more confident than she really felt, Junior told them, "I got a plan..." "Do tell," Viola growled. "Yeah," Charlie agreed. "Let's hear it."
This one took a little longer. I'm wrapping up some threads now. Jake Junior appears to be dabbling in dangerous things (some things never change, eh?). Hopefully, her wish turns out better than Jay's wish.
