Once Upon a Swap


Hazel had just finished stocking the shelves with all the human stuff that Eda and Owlbert have collected this week. King tried to reach up and grab a green flag, but he was too short. He slipped off the table and landed in some junk nearby.

"Stupid flag!" he yelled, his left eye covered by a sock. Luz and Bijou arrived, the latter carrying a ladder.

"It's been a little slow around here, but I've got just the thing to attract customers," Luz said as she climbed up and attached something to the wall. She then tapped a glyph, causing light to engulf the wood. "And who doesn't like their name in lights?"

She smiled as she changed the sign to read 'Eda the Owl Lady's Human Collectibles,' complete with a chibi Eda winking.

Bijou and Hazel were displeased, while King appeared to be bored.

"Is it too subtle?" Luz asked, rubbing her chin.

"Does subtle mean ugly?"

They turned to face Boscha and her friends. Now King, Hazel, and Bijou were just irritated.

"Hi, Boscha! Hexsidians! See anything you like?" Luz asked, motioning around her.

"Ew. No. I'm just here to take an ironic Penstagram next to your weird flashing trash sign," she said as she took pictures with her scroll. Luz gave her a frown.

"That's not funny, Boscha."

"Well, what are you going to do? Spit your human venom on me?" she mocked, rolling her eyes.

"You have venom?" King inquired, surprised. "Quick, Bij, Luz, start melting faces!"

"Calm down, King. Humans don't have venom," Hazel shot back.

"In my world, the only ones who have those are snakes, scorpions, and spiders," Bijou said to the horned beast as Luz bent down.

"And even if we could, it's not worth it. You wouldn't understand how to handle teens like her." Then King yanked her down by her hoodie.

"No, I'll show you what to do!" He jumped and landed on his two feet on the table. "You will tremble before me!"

Boscha's friends smiled as she clasped her hands. "Ooh, he's so cute!" She hugged him and took a picture with her scroll, adding flower and eye motifs.

"How much? I have to own him."

He pushed her off the table and landed back on it.

"You couldn't afford me, sister," he said with a wave of his hand, and they just cooed at him.

"Aww."

"That's the incorrect reaction!" King exclaimed, and Bijou sighed, slightly pinching her nose.

If anything, Boscha could stop talking about the stand because she was at least preoccupied with something else.

"Can we buy your almiraj friend here, Bijou?" one of Boscha's friends ask.

"Sorry but this almiraj is not on the market," Hazel retorted as he thumped his foot in protest.

Eda peered around behind the curtain.

"I smell an easy mark..." she exclaimed before leaping and landing in front of the trio.

"Hey, kid! Can I offer you the latest fashions from," she cast a spell circle and emerged dressed ridiculously. "The human realm?"

"Yeah, no," Boscha stated flatly as her friends laughed and walked away.

"Well," Eda said, her clothes returning to normal as she crossed her arms. "I hate her."

"No doubt, that girl is such a Karen," Bijou remarked dryly.

"Yeah, teens can be sour, but I'm a little sweetie. Look what I made you!" Luz pointed up to the sign, and Eda flinched when she saw it.

"Luz!" She jumped onto the table, attempting to knock it over.

"Did I spell something wrong? Or did I spell something right?"

"Luz, no," Bijou said, sighing. Eda ripped off the sign and knelt down, pointing a warning finger at Luz.

"Stop that, Luz. You might be forgetting something," she said, flicking away the light.

"I'm kinda...on the run!" she exclaimed, holding up the wanted poster. "Remember? Every guard in town would be at my doorstep if I had my name in lights."

"Not to mention they will find me and Bijou as well since we are also wanted." Hazel went on to say.

"Well, I don't see anyone right now," Luz said as she looked around.

"Maybe you're just being paranoid. You're a powerful witch. Why hide when you can 'poof' all your problems away with magic? Same goes for you, Bijou? You should strip off your worries with that magical bangle of yours."

Bijou retorted, "Magic doesn't solve everything, Luz. When you're wanted by the law, that doesn't exactly go away overnight. Eda, Hazel, and I got all those posters for a reason, and it's why that we're, you know, keeping things on the down low for her?"

She motioned to Eda.

"See! Older kid's always got a reason," Eda said, pointing to her.

"What does Luz know about problems?" King asked, motioning to the girl. "All she has is dumb teen drama! And that's Bij, too."

"Um, what exactly did I do to have dumb teen drama? I don't care about Boscha or any other mean girl here," Bijou said as she dismissed King's claim.

"What about that jerk who bumped into you at Covention? You never did anything about it."

The girl flinched as he was mentioned. She didn't want to talk about him because of how she had just seen him.

"Both of you don't understand how hard some of us have it."

"You're pampered all day like a dang baby. How hard is that life?" Eda asked.

"Well, I don't know if you realized, but I'm not a baby!" King exclaimed.

"Then why are you screaming like one?" Luz asked, smirking.

"My life is a living nightmare!" he exclaimed, the other four amused.

"Sure it is, King," snickered Hazel. "Sure it is."

"Well, when friends disagree, there's only one thing to do," Eda rubbed her hands together.

"Can we hug until we pass out?" Luz grabbed King and hugged him.

"Fight to the death!"

"No," Bijou replied emphatically. "Guys, you have hard lives, you just don't know what it's like. The best way is talk it out."

"I'm with Bijou," Hazel said, nodding.

Eda scoffed at the ideas. "No. Body swap!"

"Body swap?" Bijou repeated, puzzled.

"...Are you sure you don't shoot venom?" asked King to Luz.

Eda took out her staff, "I love a good body swap. It's like demonic possession with the ones you love."

"Are we doing that? Is that possible?" Luz exclaimed happily. "This is just like my favorite early 2000s movie, Freaky Fraturday!"

Bijou sighed, "As much as I love that movie, that method of 'a mile in someone else's shoes' is very over-the-top.

"Yeah, I think Bijou's right. Maybe we should think about this for a second," Luz said.

"Body swap!" Eda exclaimed as she lifted the staff and spun it around. Bijou and Hazel ducked out of the way, clearly passing on this.

"Ooh," Luz exclaimed in awe as a wave of gold smoke washed over them, forcing Bijou and Hazel to cover their eyes and turn away.

"Did it work? I need a mirror!" Luz ran into a mirror and slid down to the ground. On the mirror, there was a smear of makeup.

"Found one."

When Bijou and Hazel turned around, they gasped as they saw Luz inside Eda's body. The only noticeable difference was that Luz retained her eyes and mouth.

"Oh, my gosh, it worked!" she exclaimed

"I'm so old," she said, her cheeks pressed together.

"And pointy!" she exclaimed, touching her ears with a wide grin.

King, as Luz, approached the mirror, with his own eyes, messier hair, and a fang poking out of the mouth.

"Hot dog! It's me!"

"Yeah, it is. I'm the human now. Bow before my massive, meaty hands!" he exclaimed.

"Wait, so that means..."

Eda cleared her throat as their eyes widened. They looked at the smoke, and when it vanished, Eda was in King's body. She had gold fangs from King's teeth, and she had her eyes.

"How do I look?"

"I've got some...very confusing emotions right now," King admitted.

"Hazel and I stand by that," Bijou said as she averted her gaze. "I mean, I guess if you guys are happy with it, then I guess I'll be too, but it's still weird."

"All right, here's the deal. Whoever can prove their new body has the easiest life gets out of house cleaning duty. And you know what that means."

And by cleaning the house, she meant cleaning Hooty...who was now gleefully laughing while rolling in mud. Which he now enjoyed doing, much to their chagrin. They were all terrified of having to clean him.

"Won't be me," King assured them. "Life as a teen is a tyrant's dream! By the end of the day, I'll be ruling over your feeble demographic!"

"Well, I've got magic," Luz smugly stated. "Eda, don't be too mad when your inventory is gone and the guards are none the wiser," she yelled as she spun a spell circle and blasted out fire from it, knocking her to the ground.

Bijou shook her head in annoyance. Luz had the natural ability to perform magic for the day. That thought frightened her a little.

"Ha. That's cute," Eda said, laughing.

"If you need me, I'll be getting pampered on a vacation fit for a king," she said as she jumped off the table and walked away.

"My life isn't a joke!" King exclaimed after her. "But yours is...Bap!" he exclaimed, poking Luz in the nose before scurrying away.

"Not touching this one," Bijou said as she walked away. She pulled out a book on magical items.

"I'll stay here in case you screw up again, Luz," Hazel insisted.


Eda's Catastrophe

Eda walked down the streets, taking a pair of red sunglasses from a nearby display rack. She then struck a pose.

"Look at that little baby!" exclaimed a woman.

"Oh, hello."

"So adorable!" exclaimed a man, and she waved back.

"Yes, hello to you too, handsome."

"Stop right there!" she exclaimed, turning around to see a guard with a triangle symbol staring down at her.

"An Emperor's guard!" she exclaimed nervously, especially since the guard was flanked by a multi-headed dog.

"Thought you could get away with it, didn't you?"

"Wait," she said as she lowered her glasses. "Y-You know who I am?"

"Of course I do. You're...the cutest little angel I've ever seen! Who wants a lolly?" He held it out to her, and she accepted it.

"Ha! That's more like it."

The multi-headed dog whined as she snatched the lollipop.

"You got nothing!" she exclaimed as she dashed away. "Whew! Being King is a piece of cake. I'm going to win this bet for sure."

She came to a halt when she noticed someone standing in front of her.

"Wha...?" She looked up to see two elderly women wearing aprons.

"Oh, Dottie!" exclaimed one of them to her friend. "Look at this lost little dumpling!"

She extended her arms to Eda.

"What's that? Whoa!" She struggled to free herself from the woman's clutches. "Hey, I'm not lost, you creeps!"

"Poor baby! Do you need us to make you a delicious meal?"

"No, I don't need you-"

The woman scratched her belly as Eda stopped struggling.

"Tummy scratches? Ooh. You know what? Maybe I am lost," she put her hands behind her back, enjoying the attention once more. "Take me away, ladies!"

They then walked away, but there was something strange about them...

They took Eda back to a kitty café, but instead of kittens, they had brought her small animals of all kinds.

"Welcome to our kitty café," the woman said as they entered. "This is our little safe haven for cherubs like you."

The majority of the demons inside were eating and drinking, with some being served by smaller demons.

"Ugh. What hot mess is going down here?" Eda exclaimed, slightly disgusted by how cute it was.

"You see, precious cargo like you should be taken care of. Boop!" She booped Eda's nose and walked past the people who were playing with the demons. "All you should have to worry about is how many belly rubs you want or how many tasty num-nums you're gonna eat."

Eda was put in a crib.

"Well, my creep alarm is ringing, but I can't argue with num-nums," she said as Dottie handed her a cupcake.

"This place is a safe place. A place clean from the outside world. And those teenagers who filthen it," she jerked a thumb to a sign that said 'No teens a-meow-ed.'

"You have a good nap, my dearest, and welcome...to your new home," the two walked away, and Eda looked worried...but then she laughed and tossed the cupcake.

"Oh, being adorable is the life," she said before yawning.

"Time for a nap," she said, grabbing a pillow and fluffing it before crawling inside to nap. As she heard a cat meowing and gasping, a shadow fell over her. She awoke and peered, only to be attacked by a cat.

"Leave this place!" she yelled as she collapsed onto the pillow. The cat entered the crib.

"Danger is near," he gripped her collar.

"Baby demon! We have a surprise for you!" exclaimed the woman.

"Oh, you hear that, Bowtie?" she said as she pushed the cat away.

"Ow!"

"There's a new star in town," Eda boasted. As the women returned, the door opened and the cat yowled, fleeing.

"A gift for our new, cutest demon," the woman said as she handed Eda a bee costume.

"Okay, I'm out," she said, narrowing her eyes and crawling out of the crib. She then approached the door, the thinner woman staring at her.

"Dottie, please help our little angel get changed," she said, snapping her fingers, and Dottie screamed. She leaped forward, landing in front of Eda before she could reach the door. She grumbled at Eda.

"Oh no, sweetie. You can't survive out there without us."

"Ladies, stand back," Eda said, holding up a finger.

"I am not above disrespecting my elders," she said as she spun a circle, realizing she couldn't do magic in King's body. "Oh, dang. I'm not a witch right now."

"No, baby," the woman said with a smile. "You're a cutie patootie."

She creepily reached out to Eda.

"Not today, sister!" she yelled as she dashed beneath the woman's legs.

"No!"

Dottie screamed, and Eda rushed to the employees' room. She barricaded it with a small door once inside. The women pounded on it.

"Let us in this instant! It is not time for you to be there!"

"Stop babying me!" Eda exclaimed as she looked around the room. Her eyes widened as she saw little demons dressed in lifeless costumes, especially with their large eyes. It was truly terrifying...

"This vacation just took an alarming, back-alley turn," she said as she waved her hand in front of one of them.

"Tasty num-nums," he murmured, his mouth drooling.

"Don't bother."

Eda yelped and fell to the ground. The previous cat emerged from the shadows.

"Their minds are tragically gone. They've been coddled so long, they forgot how to live on their own! Their brains turned to mush."

"I thought I liked being babied, but I feel so small and helpless," Eda said, looking down at her hands. "Like...some sort of baby! But that won't happen to us, right?"

The cat began to play with yarn, mimicking the other demons on the shelf.

"I failed you, Bowtie. My closest ally," she said as she watched him play.

"Meow. Meow."

The two ladies managed to slam the door, both growling at Eda.

"I'll avenge you, Bowtie!" Eda grabbed the cat and hurled it at them. It meowed and smacked the taller one across the face. King then looked past and noticed a small hole near the entrance that appeared to be large enough for her.

"Ooh!" She dashed for it and crawled through it, only to collide with the display window.

"Huh?" She looked over at the creature nearby adding, "See our newest baby!"' on the glass in acrylic paint. He then floated away, and she turned around, terrified of the old ladies.

"Wonderful! Now everyone can see our bestest baby...forever..." she exclaimed as she held up the bee costume. Eda turned around and leaned against the window.

"Noooooooo!"


Bijou sat near the fountain, reading the book. To be honest, she would have checked in on her friends, but she already knew they'd learn their lesson the hard way sooner or later. So she'd rather just sit back and let them figure it out on their own this time. She'd just walk around town until one of them discovered her...

And someone did, but it wasn't who she expected.

"Human!"

She turned around to see the Golden Guard approaching her. She sighed slightly amusedly to herself; while the last time she saw him was a strange experience, it was kind of funny that he ran into her for no apparent reason. She still didn't like him; his demeanor left a lot to be desired.

"Oh, it's you again," she remarked politely as she closed her book and removed her headphones. She turned to face him as he landed in front of her. "Look, I'm not looking for trouble, and I haven't done anything wrong so-"

"What? No. It's just, as the Golden Guard, I have a protocol to ask if you made it home safely, without trouble of course," he said to her. He actually felt...a little off about her last night, and he had no way of contacting her. So he decided to track her down just to see if she was okay. Fortunately, she didn't appear to be hurt or upset.

"Hmm?" She raised a brow, slightly perplexed, but decided not to dwell on it for the time being. "Oh, that night when I was out? Yeah, nothing bad happened back then."

She had to lie to the Golden Guard about what happened at the library so he wouldn't catch her and bring her to the Emperor.

"What even prompted a late-night walk, human?" he inquired, his hands behind his back.

"That is none of your-"

"Unless you want to explain it to the Emperor himself," he cut her off, and she clenched her teeth.

She looked around to make sure no one was looking before waving him into the alleyway. He silently rolled his eyes at the drama, but still followed her. They both sat down on the ground, and she cast another glance to the side.

"What I'm about to tell you...you can never tell anyone. Ever. Or bring me to the Emperor," she said to him.

"We'll see about that, human."


King's Brush with Death

King reached out and ripped the flag from the ground. "Not so high and mighty anymore!" he exclaimed, tossing it down.

"I feel so alive! Whoa!" he exclaimed before collapsing into a trash can.

He struggled to get out, falling to the floor with as his legs wiggled. Something fell nearby, and his head protruded from the other end of the trash can. A puddle of water appeared nearby, and tentacles emerged from it.

"Oh no! Ahh!" he screamed as he scrambled out of the trash can, dodging a tentacle. "The flag, it seeks revenge!"

He heard laughter and turned to see two of Boscha's friends standing on a hill. One of them threw a water balloon at an innocent bystander.

"Help me! I'm a delicate man."

King gave them a stern look. "Teenagers..."

He crawled up the hill on all fours, sniffing around. He then crawled over to the two as they stood near a shack called 'Treasure Shack.'

"Hey, take this, society!" exclaimed one of the teenagers as a water balloon popped over his head. "Oh no."

He screamed as tentacles rose from the ground and grabbed him. King crept past them and lifted the curtain, sniffing it. He discovered Boscha and the rest of her friends, two of whom were bored and on Penstagram. The final one was attempting sit-ups while wearing flying shoes.

"Ugh. Just give up," Boscha said from a bean-bag chair as music played.

"I swear, I can do a sit-up!" he countered. "I'm just having a bad day!"

He still failed, and the two girls surrounded him.

"Sure, you can." They both took a selfie with him after he failed.

"I'll show Luz how to rule over these doofuses," King smirked as he moved the curtain.

"Greetings!" He looked down and realized he was still on his hands and knees.

"Er, greetings!" he exclaimed as he rose to his feet.

"Bow before your king of humans!"

The boy collapsed to the ground, the three perplexed by King's appearance. "Hey, nobody tells me what to do," the boy grumbled.

"Ugh. Shut it," Boscha snarled.

"Sorry, Boscha."

"New post," Boscha said as she approached King, holding her scroll. "Loser human thinks she can hang out in our sacred Treasure Shack. Spoiler alert: she can't. And neither can her nerdy sister, in fact." The youngster floated above King.

"Yeah, get out of here, Goody Two-shoes."

"Goody Two-shoes, huh?" King slyly removed the boy's shoes, landing between him and Boscha. Luz then donned her shoes and flew through the curtain. They watched as King flew past the red-clad student from Hexside as Boscha pulled back the curtain. He reached for the water balloon bag.

"Hey, impressionable youths! Under my command, you could learn how to do some real damage!"

He threw the entire bag into the city at once, releasing all of the balloons and tentacles. "All hail, your new teen king!"

"I didn't like her telling me what to do before, but now I love it!" exclaimed the boy as everyone looked up in awe. Boscha, on the other hand, appeared unimpressed as she huffed.

"Who wants to revolt with me today?"

"Whoo!"

"Yeah, you're the coolest!"

"We love you now!"

"I love it!"

The two girls flew after King, and the boy realized he couldn't fly since King has his sneakers. "Uh, I'll catch up!"

"Hold up! I did not give you permission to leave!" exclaimed Boscha.

"Okay, you acne-encrusted hormone buckets, let's go let out some teen angst!"

The green-haired girl picked up the boy and flew him away.

You're hanging with the cool kids

They peered over a sidewalk to see who three people waiting for the bus. The woman's facial features were suddenly shuffled around, causing her to scream.

Breaking all the rules kids

The same thing happened to the one next to her.

You're gonna have to fool the kids

However, the last person reading the newspaper already had a shuffled face, which confused them.

Into thinking that you're cool, too

They reshuffled their features into their normal positions, and they freaked out like the previous two.

They're piercing noses

They came across a sign that said 'self storage' and removed the 's' from the first word and the 'sto' from the second, making the sign read 'elf rage'.

They dye their hair

The four ducked for cover as a tall buff elf noticed the sign.

"Yeah, this sign gets it!" He exclaimed before ripping off his shirt, punching the sign, and taking off. The four laughed as they watched him before fleeing from the elf who was chasing them.

At a stand selling dolls, they were still laughing as King shushed them.

"Guys, be quiet!" he said, holding a crow while making a phone call. The Owl House crow cawed, and Hooty responded.

"Hoot House. Hooty hooting." The three laughed as King crawled up to the megaphone on top of a stand and inserted the crow.

"Oh, wow, I've been waiting all day for someone to call, and now it's finally happened!" Everyone looked up, puzzled, as they could hear him. "We can talk for hours, and hours, and hours, and hours..."

Someone screamed in agony while holding their eyes closed.

"I don't know what Luz is talking about; this life is a breeze," King boasted before colliding with Boscha, who was furious.

"Enough! I don't know why they can't remember what a weirdo loser you are, but I'm gonna help them remember."

"Ooh, I'm so scared," King teased before bursting out laughing.

"She still thinks she has power over you guys," he said, his eyes widening as they remained silent, mostly fearful. "Guys?"

"Luz, I challenge you to a race around Dead Man's Curve!" she exclaimed as lightning struck a highway.

They all exclaimed in horror: Dead Man's Curve was the most dangerous road in the Boiling Isles. Bijou would not even dare herself to go to that road.

"And we'll be racing on those!" Boscha exclaimed, pointing to some nearby rat worms. "Giant rat worms."

"You don't have to do this, you know?" one of the girls said, putting her hand on King's shoulder. "We know humans are like...super fragile."

"Don't baby me!" exclaimed King as she stormed up to the girl. "Boscha, I accept your strange teenage coming-of-age challenge thing."

At Dead Man's Curve, King struggled to get his rat worm to the starting line. One of the girls held up a chip in front of them while using her flying shoes.

"On your mark..."

King climbed the worm, his gaze fixed on Boscha.

"Get set..."

He gulped as he assessed the situation. The chip was eaten by the girl, signaling the start of the race. Boscha's worm crawled away quickly, while King's worm remained motionless.

"Let's go!"

But nothing happened.

"Worm minion, I said go!" King slapped the worm on the backside, and it bolted, with King riding it backwards. Boscha smirked, knowing she had the upper hand, while King struggled to gain control of the worm.

"Stop! I said stop!" King screamed as the worm tumbled down the road, with him holding on to it. Boscha's worm slid down the muddy track easily, whereas King's worm kept bumping into the curves. "Why?!"

He managed to catch up to Boscha, eliciting a gasp from the girl. "This is how the cool kids ride. Super backwards. On purpose," he boasted, drawing a growl from her. She then looked up and gasped, skidding her worm to a halt.

King looked at her as if he was about to win. "Yes! Say bye-bye to your popularity, Boscha."

She simply smiled and waved at him. "Bye bye."

He turned around to see why she had stopped: there was a gap in the road, which was blocked off by a caution sign. He yelped and attempted to stop the worm, but it was too late, and they both fell. Unfortunately, the gap was directly above the Treasure Shack, into which King crashed. Then the thing crumbled down, and he fell off the worm. "Ow!"

"Not the Treasure Shack!" exclaimed one of the girls.

"I don't know how to process this!" exclaimed the boy.

"Someone tell me what to do!" Boscha smirked, seeing this as her opportunity to reclaim control. "Get her!"

The kids chased King with their shoes, and he looked up before fleeing. He slid down the dirt road on all fours.

"Get back here, human!" exclaimed Boscha.

"Luz was right. I can't handle the complexities of adolescence; I just want my body back!" he exclaimed as he tripped over a can of paint near the Kitty Café.

"I think I saw her go this way!"

He dashed inside the café after hearing Boscha's voice. He panted heavily as the teens flew right by, oblivious to the no teens sign above his head. He sighed in relief, and the lights flashed, startling him. The taller woman noticed him and stepped out of the employees' room.

"Dottie! A teen has come to steal our little babies!" she exclaimed as she lunged forward with the broom.

"No, wait! I am a little baby!" King protested, ducking as the broom slammed against the door. She began chasing him with the broom, breaking a table in the process.

"No, you're not," she scowled. "You're a rotten teen! But when we're finished with you, you'll be calling for your mother!"

She took out two hair pins and sharpened them with her teeth.

"Lady, I just want my body back!"

"You can have it," he said, looking to his right to see Eda, dressed as a bee, sitting in the display window. "Your life is pretty terrible. But hey, it'll probably be over soon."

Dottie threw a cloth over him as he looked up in horror at the two women looming over him.


Back to Bijou and the Golden Guard...

"Wait, really? The books in the library came to life?" asked the Golden Guard, and Bijou nodded. She had told him almost everything that had happened in the library, with the exception of the part with the twins for obvious reasons. "Fascinating. I never knew that was even possible!"

"It was. That's the effect of the Wailing Star on every piece of written literature," Bijou said.

She expected him to bring her to the Emperor or, at the very least, arrest her the entire time she was telling the story because it was breaking and entering. But he seemed to be fine with it all, which perplexed her even more—especially since she openly admitted she wasn't joining a coven and wanted nothing to do with magic.

"...Why haven't you brought me in yet?" she asked slowly, pausing. "I mean, Lilith seems to be more active than you are if anything."

"The Owl Lady is her priority right now," He said simply, crossing her arms. "Mine is being by the Emperor's side whenever he needs it."

She leaned back, her gaze fixed on him. "That's not the answer I'm looking for."

"Think of it as an apology for running into you at Covention," he finally said, surprising her. He sounded genuinely sincere this time, and... she wished she could see more of this side of him.

"But only this time. Once I turn you in, we'll send you to the Conformatorium!"

Bijou recoiled, but then he looked to his right, and she followed him to see that some Coven Guards had seen them. Admittingly, she hadn't realized they were there, but shrugged and left after hearing the Golden Guard's exclamation. He returned her gaze, and she cleared her throat.

"Thank you, for the apology and for what you just did," she said, holding her arm and looking away. He then looked down at her book, feeling strange asking, but he really wanted to...and he wasn't supposed to, but she made him want to.

"Learning about your bangle, I see?"

She looked at him with wide eyes, glancing down at her book on ancient magic.

"Well, Eda and my sister warranted some questions, so I figured to start where it originated... Eda even gave me this book and showed me the pages about this bangle. Why?"

"I've been researching it as well; there are all kinds of magical items that people don't often use due to innate magic, such as-" He froze and then stopped himself. "Forget it. I'm actually not even sure why I'm talking about this with you."

Her eyes softened slightly as she sensed his eagerness to learn about it, but couldn't...and she hadn't expected to learn anything about him until today. But now she sees him as somewhat similar to her. Because it reminded her of how she wished she could be free of responsibilities all the time.

"I understand," she said, smiling slightly. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

He kept staring at her, finding her more endearing with each interaction.

"Having all kinds of magic must be fun; Luz would literally die for that kind of power," Bijou said as she averted her gaze and he paused. She looked up at him when she didn't hear back. And she didn't realize why until she noticed him slightly gripping his staff and connected the dots.

"I've been wondering. You can't do magic without your staff, can you?"

"It's none of your business," he snapped, and she raised her hands. "Sorry...but maybe we could spark that interest of wild magic and imbued items!"

He looked at her in disbelief, but was also surprised that she didn't say anything about how embarrassing or lame it was.


Luz's Deals in Heels

"Whew!" Luz exclaimed from the stand, as Hazel watched in amusement.

"Okay, let's try this again," she said, looking down at her boots. "And...strut, strut, strut."

She stumbled as she fell on a few crates. A lamp nearby fell and hit the ground, shattering.

"How does Eda wear these all day?" Luz asked, raising her leg in disbelief.

"It's a mystery that even I don't want to know the answer to," Hazel shrugged.

Luz noticed the broken lamp on the ground.

"Oh, no. What have my heels done? Wait a second," she laughed as she realized something: she's in Eda's body. "I'm a ding dang witch!"

She stood up and formed a spell circle, but she was thrown behind the table by a fire spell.

"Boy, Eda is powerful," she said as she blasted more magic from her hand. "Ahh! Not again!"

"Eda is a powerhouse, Luz. That is why her powers are not to be underestimated," Hazel reminded her as he gave her a pair of worn-out oven mitts, each one having a hole where the index finger can be seen. "Here. Use these."

"Okay," she said as she put on the oven mitts. "Let's try this one more time."

Luz spun another spell circle, and she did fix the lamp...but it now had two more lamps with human legs. "I made magic with my hands!" she exclaimed joyfully.

"Ooh, so unnecessarily extravagant," one customer remarked. "I'll take it!"

"Zippo swappo!" Luz exclaimed, and the thing walked away, much to the delight of the customer. The customer tossed a coin and said, "Sold to the savvy shopper."

"Okay, magic hands, let's see what else we can magically magic," she said as she made a larger, brighter sign. Her hat was a top hat. "Step right up and feast your eyes on the marvels of the human realm!"

Some people seemed to be drawn to her.

"Oh, what is this?"

"Where did the other stand go?"

Luz knelt next to someone who had closed his eyes, the light reflecting on his left cheek.

"Your lights are too bright, and I forgot why I came here."

Luz smirked as she looked to the side. "Was it for...laughter?" She tickled him with a feather duster, and he burst out laughing.

"Joy! So painful," he exclaimed, holding out a handful of coins.

"I'll take two for my enemies," he said eagerly.

The centaur with its face on its chest asked Luz for a face on his head. She waved a finger while drawing on his face with a marker. He shed happy tears as he handed her a bundle of coins.

A baby was crying until Luz gave it a pacifier, and the mother gave Luz her entire life savings.

"Thank you! Please come again!" Luz exclaimed to the dispersing crowd.

"Seems like your marketing skills really gave us a haul," Hazel said, his smile quickly turning to a frown. "But don't you think the lights will give us away to the lawmakers?"

"Don't be such a wuss, Hazel; no one has caught us," Luz said, taking Eda's staff in her hand. "Besides, there's a little something for everyone. Take it from me, Eda, the Boiling Isles' gift to magic."

"Is that right?" a man in a cloak asked, his voice gruff. "You're the famous Eda the Owl Lady?"

Eda knew what that person was and hid under the table.

"That depends..." she said as she slowly removed her hat.

"Are you a fan...of magic?" she asked, taking a small bouquet of flowers from her hat.

"No, but I am a fan of..." He took off his cloak, revealing himself to be a member of the Emperor's Coven. "The law!"

"Oh, no!" The flowers wilted in fear as Luz was taken aback. Another guard approached her as the guard cuffed her arm.

"We're finally able to catch you in the act. All thanks to this little light show of yours."

She glanced between them, remembering that she had an advantage.

"Gentlemen, what do you say we forget this whole thing ever happened?" she said, motioning to one of the guards.

"Amnesia spell!" she exclaimed, but instead gave him a pacifier... "Haven't quite got the hang of this yet."


The Golden Guard stared at Bijou as she flipped through her book, trying to figure out what she could say to him that would pique his interest. There were so many topics, and she hadn't realized he was staring at her. Mostly because he was still stunned by what she had said earlier.

You are not required to inform me if you do not wish to.

It was a simple sentence, but it meant a lot to him. The fact that she was only trying to pique his interest reminded him of why he thought she was interesting in the first place, because no one had ever tried to do so with him. He then noticed her purse and noticed her sketchpad peeking out.

"What's this one?" He took it from her bag, and she panickily looked up.

"Oh no, please don't read that," she said gently, taking it back in her hands. "Um, it's private."

"What is it? Technically, I have to know if it's illegal~! Wouldn't want the Emperor to get his hands on it."

In defeat, she sighed at the card he was playing. "It...it's my sketchpad. I always carry it with me if I get inspired."

"You...draw?"

"Okay, fine. You see, I've always been good at drawing. My father thought I could use my drawing skills to become an engineer one day. But that's not what I was looking for. I aspired to be a fashion designer. But, surprise, surprise, my father and many others advised me to abandon my dream of becoming a fashion designer and pursue a more conventional career."

"Humans can do stuff like that?" he asked slowly, and she returned his gaze.

"We do a lot of things you don't have here; we're just as complex as the witches here, you know," Bijou explained after a brief pause.

He learned a lot from her today, and if it hadn't been for his insistence, she might've gotten him to talk about things he was passionate about...

"Human...I-"

"Can't we just talk this out?"

Bijou gasped at the familiar voice, and they turned to their right to see the guards escorting Luz away.

"I'm not Eda the Owl Lady, I'm just a hormone-filled teenage girl who likes making anime videos!"

"Oh no!" Bijou exclaimed as she frantically stood up.

"What is it?" the Golden Guard inquired, and she blocked his path. He'd definitely confuse Luz for Eda because she was in the wrong body.

"Um, um, I gotta go now! This was...actually not as bad as I expected," she admitted, running away.

He stared at the girl, deciding to sit back and let Lilith handle it, even if it meant Bijou would be captured. But...he had some faith, however small. Bijou returned his gaze, relieved that he wouldn't interfere.


Luz's mugshot was taken at the police precinct, and the camera barfed out the image.

"This is some of my best work; it really captures the shame," he said as he showed her the mugshot, and she frowned as the staff was removed. Owlbert squawked as he was cinched in a shackle.

"Yeah, you're going away for a long time, you filthy criminal."

Owlbert looked downcast at Luz.

"Owlbert! This is all a big mistake," she exclaimed as she was led away into another room. "Y-You're gonna laugh when I explain."

A member of the Coven gasped as they made their way inside the police station.

"Is it really her?"

"Oh, no. This is not good."

"Hey, you gotta take that thing out before someone sees you," one guard warned the other with the pacifier.

"I like it," he said, shrugging. "Calms the nerves."

When they caught sight of Lilith's reflection, he dropped it from his mouth.

"Uh, Madame Lilith, to what do we owe this honor?" they both asked as they bowed to her.

"Word reached me that you captured my sister," she said. "I'll take it from here."

"But Madame, she's going straight to the Conformatorium; I've got the order right here," he said, holding it up, and she burned it.

"The orders have changed."

"HEY!"

When they heard shouts, Bijou and Hazel entered the room, followed by a few guards.

"I'm sorry, Madame, but they slipped right past us-"

"You're one of the humans in her care... and that must be your almiraj companion," Lilith realized as a guard grabbed Bijou's arms and another Hazel.

"This is a misunderstanding! That's not Eda, that's-"

"Come with me, and you'll see why we're all here," she said, startling them all.

"But...but she broke-"

"I'll handle it, just like I did with my sister," she said quietly, and the two guards let go of the girl and almiraj. Lilith walked away, their eyes wide with confusion. Bijou and Hazel chose to follow her carefully, hoping to persuade Lilith to let them all go.

"Look, guys, you got the wrong Eda!" Luz exclaimed as the trio entered the room.

"Hello, Edalyn," Lilith said.

"Oh, thank goodness! Familiar faces! Bijou! Hazel!" Luz exclaimed as she noticed them. "You're Eda's sister, right? Is it Libby? No. Limby..."

"Your show of affection is...touching. Do you know why you three are here?"

"Well, as I was telling the guard, this is just a classic Freaky Fraturday mix-up," Luz explained, looking at her sister, who shook her head quickly.

"Sister, the charges against you are long and many," Lilith said, holding up a scroll with...dozens of Eda's crimes written on it. "Operating a stand without a permit, owning a hocus without a pocus-"

"Yeah, I think that list goes on for a while."

"We don't have time for this! Ma'am, she's not the real Eda," Hazel objected, motioning to the girl. He assumed that because of the body swap spell, Lilith couldn't tell that Eda wasn't Eda. "And why are Bijou and I even here?"

Lilith cast a glance behind him.

"I'm getting to it, almiraj," she said as she whipped back to Luz. "These charges are serious. There's no more running away, Edalyn."

"I know," Luz said, closing her eyes. "I can't just 'poof' my problems away."

Lilith sat next to her, clutching her arms.

"But we can! You getting caught was clearly a cry for help. Join the Emperor's Coven, like we dreamed about when we were girls."

"What?!" Bijou and Hazel exclaimed, stunned.

"Eda wanted to be in the Emperor's Coven?"

"This is why I brought you here," Lilith explained to the girl. "To show you that when family is in need, you need to encourage them in the right direction. Your direction!"

That made Bijou and Hazel look a little uneasy.

"Don't be afraid, sister. Soon, you won't be a danger to those around you. Bring out the branding glove." She spun a finger, tying Luz, Bijou, and Hazel up.

"The what now?"

The guard put on a glove with the glowing symbol. He slammed the table against the wall.

"Wait, you're making a mistake!" Luz exclaimed as she cast a large spell circle. "I'm not a danger to anyone!"

Then she heard a noise.

"Uh-oh."

The wall blew up, and the three coughed, suddenly free of their shackles. "Owlbert, come to me!" Owlbert flew through the prison and smacked into Luz.

"Sorry, buddy," she apologized before casting another spell to free him. "Eda's life is more complicated than I thought."

"If we could speed it up, we'd have to go!" Hazel said as he hopped on Bijou's shoulder while latter grabbed Luz's arm before they dashed away.

Lilith growled as she looked at the hole, her hair a bit messy.

"Okay, if I were Eda, and Eda is King, where would I be?" Luz wondered as the two ran.

"That's a question I never expected to be asked," Bijou said, puzzled.

"Ahh, you're right! This thing's so confusing!" Luz agreed with her friend.

"After them!" Lilith yelled, pointing to the pair.

They arrived near the Kitty Café and heard banging on the window. When they turned around, Eda and King were pounding on the glass.

"Luz! Bring my dang body over here!" Eda exclaimed, King dressed in a blue shirt.

"There they are!" Hazel pointed to where they are.

"Eda!" Luz exclaimed, sprinting over to them.

"Oh, look, Dottie," said the taller woman. "If they entered our store, it's not kidnapping; just think of it as good customer service."

Luz cast a spell, transforming one of the lamps into the one she had previously sold.

"Why did our lamp become unnecessarily extravagant?" she inquired as the three crept in, turning to see the four, the group gasping.

"Hi," Eda said flatly.

"Go, go, go!" Luz exclaimed as they dashed out the door. The woman exclaimed, glaring.

"After them!"

Dottie growled as she held up a net.

"What weird stuff did you get my body into?" Luz wondered as they came across Lilith and the guards.

"There she is," Lilith grinned, one of the guards holding the multi-headed dog.

"I've got the same question," Eda said. They turned around, only to be confronted by Boscha and her friends.

"Dang! I forgot about them."

"All right," Eda said. "Did everybody learn a valuable lesson about experiencing each other's hardships?"

"Yep!" said both Luz and King at the same time.

"Kinda makes it feel unfair that only Bijou and Hazel got out unscathed." Luz added.

"I'm not sure if you want to count that as a good thing," Bijou said, looking around at all the different groups.

"All right, let's finish this nightmare," Eda said as she took the staff from Luz. "Body swap!"

She tossed the staff into the air, and Bijou and Hazel took a step back, watching as the spell washed over them, returning them to normal. However, the clothes they were wearing when they were swapped remained.

"My body!" King exclaimed, looking down at the massive shirt he was wearing. "My glorious little body!"

Eda's bee costume was ripped from her because it was too small for her.

"Sister," Lilith growled. "Time and again I've offered you my help, yet you foolishly run back to your worthless life! I'm tired of trying, Edalyn. Your days of running are over!"

"Thanks, Luz," Eda said dryly, returning her gaze.

"Sorry," Luz said quietly.

"Don't worry, I got this," Eda said, spinning her staff above her head. "Body swap!"

She spun the staff as the spell emanated from it, affecting everyone in the vicinity. Barking could be heard coming from the dog.

"Eda, you rotten sister!" Lilith exclaimed as she found herself in the dog's body. "Switch me back! Ahh! Woof!"

"What's happening?" The guards were in the bodies of the elderly ladies. "Who the heck are you?"

"I'm a Coven guard, wise mouth!"

"No, you're not. I am!"

"You get outta my body, you galoot!" screamed the taller thin woman in the body of the blonde boy as she tackled the first guard down.

"Fight!" yelled the second guard as he moved forward, only for something to break. "Ow! My knees."

"Hey, ow! This is your fault! Let go! My arm! Ow!" Everyone was fighting for their lives, and the group stepped back, causing chaos.

"Are they gonna be okay?" King inquired of his companions.

"...Ehh," Eda simply shrugged.

"Eda," Luz said, turning to face her. "I just wanna say that things can be more complicated than you think. But with you guys, it all feels a little less mixed up."

"Aw, that's sweet, kid," Eda said with a smile.

"But I think I can safely say that we're never going through this again," Bijou said, placing a hand on Luz's shoulder.

"Agreed, let's never speak of this again," Eda said as they flew away from the fighting. Lilith's body contained a howling dog. As they flew past him, the Golden Guard peered.

"By the way, where were you during all this?"

"Oh, ah, nowhere in particular," Bijou said nervously, waving her hands. "Just... ran into someone unexpected, that's all."

He relaxed slightly as she kept their conversation private. He then smirked at everyone in the room.

"Looks like I got an easy job today, thanks to you, human..."


"So, wait," Luz said as they returned home, a question still on her mind. "Who is going to clean Hooty? It's getting...dire."

"Guys? Today's my monthly cleaning," Hooty said from afar. "Hoot, hoot. I'm 20% mucus, but don't let that stop you. Come on, I have so many hard-to-reach spots that need swabbing!" "Maybe if we all work together, we could-"

"Not it!" said King, Bijou, Hazel, and Eda all at once.

"Aw, man," Luz exclaimed.


Inside their room, Hazel was fast asleep, while Bijou paced around, thinking about the Golden Guard. She wasn't sure what it was, but he was...kind of nice once you got past his ego. And, unlike the first time they met, she only felt it a couple of times. But...doesn't she want to see him again?

"This...is the craziest thought I've ever had," she exclaimed, shaking her head. "He's still on the wrong side of the law! He could turn me in at any time!" But...he didn't seem too eager to do so, which she didn't expect from him. And if he really wanted to arrest her, he had plenty of options that he hadn't used before. They'd seen each other three times now, and he was noticeably different each time.

She looked out the window, unsure what to do about him. She obviously couldn't tell anyone about any of this. Given their circumstances, they'd think it was ridiculous, and Eda would be furious if she found out. But she was aware of it somewhere deep within... She couldn't wait for them to cross paths again.


A/N: Here is the latest chapter. Leave your reviews (as long as they are not negative). Only 8 more days until Christmas Day, too. Can't wait to visit my relatives next week. Anyway, that's all there is to it today. Thank you and happy holidays.