ok imagine the middle ages but there were phones and chat apps

byzantine and bulgar are chatting

byzantine: wyd

bulgar: I'm polishing the sword, wbu? :D

byzantine: I'm lying in bed :D send me pics, you've got me curious :DD

bulgar: *sends byzantine photos of him polishing an actual sword*

byzantine: ugh u really are an idiot

bulgar: and ur a ho and u can't deny it, you've got a boyfriend yet u wanna look at ppl's swords :D

(the boyfriend in question was khazar)

(maybe she got khazar to attack bulgar after this exchange)

(also see, onoghur has no reason to get jealous easily, bulgar is to be trusted)