Welcome to my first foray into Naruto Fanfiction! If you've never read my work before, I am told they are generally good. I always feel like it's inane ramblings. I hope you end up enjoying this little story!

This story takes place sometime after wave but before chunnin exam.


A loud sigh escaped Naruto as he walked down the street with hands behind his head. Glancing out the corner of his eye, Naruto watched Konohamaru copy his posture and was walking with his hand behind his head too. Today was supposed to be Naruto's day off from team training and missions. Naruto had actually planned to relax today instead of doing some more training. Instead, Konohamaru had found him and convinced him to train him for the day. Apparently, Moegi and Udon had family business so Ebisu let Konohamaru have the day off from extra tutoring. Of course, Konohamaru decided to follow Naruto's example and get in some more training. Naruto watched Konohamaru with a small smile of pride as he began to lead them to one of the training grounds on the edge of the village.

As Naruto and Konohamaru were nearing their training ground of choice they came across a young brown hair Hyuga by themselves. Naruto squinted when he saw the Hyuga's face. Something about them was familiar. Turning to Konohamaru, Naruto saw the young academy student glaring at the stranger.

"You know them?" Naruto asked, pointing at the Hyuga with his chin.

"Yeah, she's in my class. That's Hanabi Hyuga and like all Hyuga's she has a really large stick shoved all the way up her ass," Konohamaru said nearly yelling.

Naruto just sighed as he watched Hanabi turn around to glare at Konohamaru. The veins around her eyes bulged as the Byakugan stared Konohamaru down.

"If you have something to say Sarutobi-san, say it to my face," Hanabi said as she glared at Konohamaru.

Konohamaru was unfazed as he gave a cocky grin.

"My apologies almighty Hyuga-sama, allow me to repeat myself. You have a stick shoved so far up your ass that I'm surprised you aren't skewered like a pig."

Hanabi's eyes narrowed as she bent her legs. Naruto sighed again as he watched Hanabi's leg tense before she launched herself straight at Konohamaru with chakra laced hands. Konohamaru's eyes were wide and before Hanabi could strike him chakra smoke filled her vision. Too late to stop, Hanabi continued with her strike. As the smoke cleared, Hanabi found herself punching the stomach of a much larger person before they too disappeared into smoke. Hanabi blinked as her Bakyugan faded away leaving her staring at the footprints before her.

"Oh, hell that hurt! Wait, why'd I know that?"

Hanabi's head snapped over to see the whiskered blond rubbing his stomach and scratching the back of his head while Konohamaru snickered next to him.

"Oi fox face, who are you?" Hanabi said growling.

Naruto blinked before staring at Hanabi for a second. Before she could say anything Naruto made his move.

"Me? I'm Naruto Uzumaki, your future Hokage, believe it!" Naruto said pointing at himself with his thumb with a hand on his hips.

Hanabi stared with an incredulous look before a burst of loud laughter tore through her.

"You? Hokage? Maybe when pigs fly!" Hanabi said in between laughs.

Naruto's eye twitched before he crossed his arms.

"I'll make you eat your words. I will become Hokage, that I promise you and I'll never go back on my promise. That's my nindo way!"

Hanabi laughed a little louder before she forced herself to calm down. She could see the pure confidence that rolled off Naruto. A wicked smile crossed her face.

"Such big talk for a shorty like you. I bet you couldn't even beat me in a spar." Hanabi said, dropping into her stance.

Once more Naruto's eye twitched.

"You're in no position to comment on my height, you shrimp," Naruto said, causing Hanabi to growl. "Besides that, beating up an academy student doesn't sound like fun."

"You're a coward. Too scared of getting your ass kicked by a little girl huh?"

"You're just asking for it," Naruto muttered as he stared at Hanabi's smug face. Naruto squinted his eyes as a mischievous look came across his face. "You know what, why don't I show you my best move. My Kage Killer. That is all I need to take you down."

Hanabi scoffed, "Please, as if someone like you would have such a move. If you can't take me down in one move, then it's my win."

"It's a bet," Naruto said before laughing. He didn't even bother to drop into his fighting stance.

Hanabi just narrowed her eyes, not bothering to activate her bloodline. For a moment everything was still. No sound, no wind, no movement until a stray leaf floated through the area. Just as the leaf touched the floor Hanabi sprinted forward. Her arm was pulled back ready to strike as chakra trailed from her fingers. Naruto just smirked as he raised his fingers up in a cross.

Poofs of smoke appeared before Hanabi causing her to leap back. Just as Hanabi was about to gloat about the attack missing, her words got caught in her throat. Hanabi flushed red as she stared at the chiseled body of many nearly nude men posing before her. A loud eep escaped Hanabi as she fainted a small bit of blood dripping out her nose. One of the, now normal, clones of Naruto caught her before she hit the ground.

"Sexy Jutsu: Reverse Harem," Naruto said, crossing his arms. Naruto blinked before snapping his fingers. "Hinata! That's who firecracker reminds me of. I bet she's Hinata's sister or something… Wait does that mean Hinata is also a pervert?" Naruto said scratching his cheek.

"That was awesome boss! Hanabi has never lost a sparring match till now. Now she can't walk around being all smug!" Konohamaru laughed as he did a victory dance.

"You've got nothing to celebrate Konohamaru. I'm a trained shinobi, I could have ended that fight in a hundred different ways. Only when you can beat her yourself can you celebrate." Naruto said tapping Konohamaru on the head.

Konohamaru pouted before jumping up, "Alrighty then boss. Let's get some training done so I can beat her ass." Before he could run off found himself grabbed by the scarf.

"I'm not in the mood to chase after you. Especially since we got an extra," Naruto said as he began walking. "It'd be rude to just leave her here and taking back to her home would raise too many questions I don't want to answer.

Konohamaru pouted as he followed after Naruto.

000

Something was wrong as Hanabi began to wake. She was sitting upright, something covered her torso. A cool breeze was brushing over her as the sounds of panting, snapping of clothes, some cursing reached her. Barely cracking one eye open, Hanabi saw Konohamaru and Naruto sparring in front of her. Hanabi opened both eyes to watch Naruto weave between each of Konohamaru's strikes while delivering a hard tap whenever Konohamaru was wide open. They continued this dance across the field until they stopped in front of her. Konohamaru had his hands on his knees as he panted. Sweat covered his face while Naruto did not show even a sign of being tired. Naruto was just grinning as he placed his hands behind his head. It was only now that Hanabi realized that Naruto was wearing a black shirt and not his jump suit's jacket. Hanabi's eyes widened when she looked down to see Naruto's jacket covering her.

"Good job, Konohamaru. Take a break, you look like you are about to pass out." Naruto laughed when Konohamaru just flopped onto his back and closed his eyes. Naruto turned his head to look over at Hanabi who began to blush. "You look and act just like Hinata."

"What does my sister have to do with anything?" Hanabi said, jumping to her feet. She bunched Naruto's jacket into a ball. "Also, that was a cheap and dirty trick. I can't believe you call that your 'Kage Killer.'" Hanabi threw the jacket at Naruto who just caught it. She blushed a bit as she crossed her arms and huffed.

"We're shinobi Hanabi-chan. Tricks and deception are our bread and butter. Besides, old man Hokage totally fell for my Kage Killer. Hell, he fell for my normal one. If I used my harem version, I'm pretty sure I'll end up giving him a heart attack." Naruto laughed while Konohamaru snickered.

"Normal version?" Hanabi said letting curiosity take her.

Naruto grinned, "Sexy Jutsu!"

A puff of smoke surrounds Naruto before fading away. Hanabi's eyes bulged as her blush came back full force. In Naruto's spot stood a well-endowed twin-tailed blonde. Her eyes were so blue it was like staring into the sky. Small strips of smoke circled around the blonde censoring her from the world.

"T-t-t-that took out Hokage-sama?" Hanabi said, dropping her jaw.

Naruko giggled, "You better believe it!" Hanabi's blush deepened at the melodic voice that came from Naruko. "If you go to his office and look just right of the door you will see a dent from where he launched himself there." Naruko laughed loudly as she put her hands on her hip.

Hanabi covered her eyes, "P-p-please just change back."

"Man, you are just like Hinata just a little louder." Naruto laughed before he squatted next to Konohamaru. "Since you laughed earlier, I'll take you've recovered." Konohamaru groaned as Naruto dragged him to his feet. "Time for Jutsu practice." Naruto punched a fist into his palm. Naruto perked up as he turned to Hanabi with a grin. "Why don't you join us?"

"What Jutsu would you teach that I couldn't learn by myself?"

"There's more to my Killer Kage technique than just being a really sexy henge." Naruto gave Hanabi a sly smile.

"Hold up, why are you going to teach her? She's a smug ass," Konohamaru said glaring at Hanabi.

Naruto smacked Konohamaru on the head, "That may be true, but that doesn't change the fact she will one day be your comrade. I have no doubt she will become a genin and climb the ranks. I rather you both have a tool you can use but never need than need it and not have it. The Sexy Jutsu is the ultimate distraction, its potential is unlimited. We shall become famous for knowing it!" Naruto began to cackle as Hanabi and Konohamaru sweatdropped.

Hanabi stared at the cackling blond before walking up and bowing deeply. Naruto stopped mid-cackle to watch Hanabi.

"Uzumaki-sensei, please teach me your Jutsu,"

Naruto blinked before pumping a fist into the air.

"Hell yeah! Two students! Let's not waste time and get moving to our training spot. Also, Hanabi-chan, don't be so formal. The name's Naruto, only old grumps call me Uzumaki and none of this sensei stuff. We're future comrades, your success means Konoha stands another day."

"You seem extremely confident that I will be a shinobi," Hanabi said standing straight.

"You're in the academy plus you are a Hyuga, whatever you do will probably be related to shinobi matters. Besides that, you're Hinata's imouto-san. I'm sure you'll be a shinobi just like her."

Hanabi simply nodded before Naruto started to walk out of the training area.

"Well, first thing lunch. It'll be my treat. I hope you like ramen! Ichiraku here we come! Hurry up Konohamaru, Firecracker."

Hanabi's eyes twitched as she began to chase after Naruto and Konohamaru.

"Don't call me that!"

000

Konohamaru and Hanabi found themselves hiding behind a neon sign as they sat on top a roof. Naruto was peeking out from behind the sign before he turned around and gave them a thumbs up.

"Perfect, with warm weather like this people will certainly be out and about," Naruto said, sweeping the rooftop a bit.

"Why're we here boss?" Konohamaru said as he peeked out behind the sign.

"For a few reasons, the Sexy Jutsu is all about temptation and using the desire of your opponent to your advantage. So we're going to people watch and study their body language, how people respond to certain physical cues and stuff. This will help with your henge as well. It will also help with any future undercover work as well as practicing your observation ability. You need to be able to spot important details in a matter of seconds. It's the difference between getting caught or not."

"Everything sounds logical but I think Sarutobi-san was referring more to the fact we are in the red-light district," Hanabi said stoically with a deep frown.

"You tell me a better place to learn about physical seduction in the village and we can go there," Naruto said, raising an eyebrow. When neither said anything, a smug smile crossed Naruto's face. "I thought so."

The two academy students grumbled as they began to people watch. Most of the people out and about looked like normal civilians with the odd person wearing more revealing clothing. Naruto had his two students henge into a random citizen he pointed to. If they failed, he made them do ten burpees while making them hold a leaf to the forehead. Naruto nitpicked everything. Missing a mole? Burpees. Wrong shade of green? Burpees. Posture slightly off? You guessed it, burpees.

Eventually, Konohamaru and Hanabi were starting to do less and less exercises until Naruto told them to stop. Konohamaru was wiping sweat away with a towel as Hanabi chugged a bottle of water. Naruto looked on with a wide grin as the two sat back to back to rest. Two large bowls of katsu don were placed before them. Hanabi and Konohamaru wasted no time to dig in. In the background, Naruto happily slurped his ramen as the neon sign turned on. The three watched as one by one the other neon signs turned on for the night.

Night had fallen over the red-light district and people were out in full.

"Mom's going to kill me for being out so late. No, she's going to kill me when she finds out I was here," Konohamaru said looking up at the waning moon.

"It is going to be unpleasant when my father finds out about this," Hanabi said with a sigh leaning against Konohamaru.

"Are you shinobi in training or not? Let this be an excellent test of your poker face," Naruto said grinning, "and if that fails just blame it on me and how I kidnapped you."

The two just nodded as they rested against each other. Naruto smiled as he brought out a camera and snapped a picture of the two dozing. Deciding to let the two rest for a bit, Naruto began to plan out the rest of this impromptu lesson. Eventually, Naruto figured enough time had passed and gently shook the two awake again.

"Time for the last lesson of the Sexy Jutsu. The art of seduction," Naruto said, causing Hanabi's and Konohamaru's eyes went wide as they began to blush deeply. "Don't look so embarrassed you two, you've both seen my Jutsu. What else did you think it was? Anyways come over here by the edge, we're going to watch the masters of seduction at work."

"Mom's going to kill me," Konohamaru chanted as he peeked over the edge.

"Masters of seduction? Prostitutes?" Hanabi said before taking the other side of Naruto.

"And strippers. Now the kind of seduction we're focusing on will be physical cues. Such as body postures, eye contact, and other things."

Naruto began to point out a few different women to watch. He talked about how some of them acted flirty by leaning forward, bouncing, and other things like smiles or the brief licking of the lips. They compared how eye contact was very important as the less successful ladies did not maintain eye contact well. Naruto pointed out the difference between a real shy person and someone faking it. How the fake shy person keeps her body always somewhat in direct view and how they maintain good eye contact only looking away at the right moments. Naruto also pointed out how none of the ladies ever crossed them over their chest unless they felt threatened, it was always crossed underneath to draw eyes to their assets.

Naruto pulled his students away from the edge and began to drill them again. Sometimes using the ladies and some men from below or forcing the two to make up a false identity. Much to their chagrin, they practiced both male and female versions of the Sexy Jutsu. Of course, they tripped up on themselves several times. Konohamaru got launched by a nosebleed several times. Hanabi on the other hand would flush red before fainting much like her sister. Each time Naruto would just roll his eyes before laying them out of the way and tossing a blanket over them.

The neon sign flickered a couple of times as Naruto sat with this back against it. Konohamaru and Hanabi stood before him both with faces of determination on them. With a nod from Naruto, Hanabi and Konohamaru raised their hands together.

"Sexy Jutsu: Bi's Dream."

Multiple clouds of smoke appeared. Naruto snickered at the name the two created. As the smoke cleared positioned around Naruto were several sexily posing men and women. A mix of different hair colors, poses, and body types surround Naruto. Naruto paid close attention to small details, like a mole on the cheek, the subtle lean forward, the lip bite, the smokey eyes, and the flexing of a muscle.

Naruto clapped as smoke once more surrounded him.

"I'm so proud of you both. No pervert could resist that Jutsu," Naruto said laughing loudly.

Hanabi and Konohamaru beamed up at Naruto as they sat next to him against the sign.

"Naruto-san, why did you come up with this Jutsu?" Hanabi asked looking up at the moon.

Naruto blinked as amusement fled from him. His cerulean eyes darken as he turned to face the waning moon.

"I don't know if you know this, but I am an orphan." Naruto paused hearing the sharp intake of breath from Konohamaru and Hanabi. "As a kid, I was ignored. Not just by one or so people but by the entire village I was ignored. For them, it was easier to pretend I never existed. As such, I grew up alone. For the longest time, I never knew why everyone was so keen on ignoring me. I began to people watch, I wanted to know what made me different from others. No one was very keen on me just watching them. Eventually, I ended up here, hiding behind the sign alone. I did what I always did and began to watch. Everything I taught to you today was from hours of watching them below. When we learned the henge in class, I realized that I could use everything I learned watching here and put it to use. After all, they would notice that right. Noticed they did, people finally paid attention to me. Negative attention but attention nonetheless." Naruto laughed. "Ah sorry you two, I didn't mean to bring down the mood with a sob story."

"Did you ever find out why they ignored you, boss?" Konohamaru asked softly.

Naruto sighed before bringing a hand up and rubbing Konohamaru's head.

"I did, but in the end, it's because people were stupid. When you two become genin then I tell you. Until then, promise me you keep training hard. One day you might find yourself fighting to protect someone dear to you. I want you two to promise me that you will hold on to your precious people with all you have because you never know when you won't have one."

"It's a promise of a lifetime boss," Konohamaru said softly.

"A promise of a lifetime indeed, Naruto-nii," Hanabi said, causing Naruto to look at her with wide eyes.

Naruto's eyes softened a bit as he bumped shoulders with Hanabi. The small smile he wore shined with happiness as he put his arms around both of them.

"Tonight, I'll help you sneak into your rooms. We're out later than I planned, and I want to try to not get you two into a lot of trouble." Naruto helped the two to their feet before they departed the little roof alcove.

They shared a smile before they disappeared into the shadows of Konoha's night.


I hope you enjoyed this. Not sure if the rating is right, but I mean it's teaching two eight/nine-year-olds seduction. I felt it was better safe than sorry.

I always thought Naruto would make for an interesting older brother/mentor figure as he had his share of crappy teachers and I could see Naruto trying his best to make sure no one else suffered like him. I also thought there were not enough stories of Naruto being a teacher or Hanabi interacting with Naruto. So I rolled it all into one. Also, no this is not going to be a Hanabi/Naruto story.

Anyway, check out some of my other works of fanfic! Follow me at Twitter PhantomQazs to get updates about my stories or to just ask me stuff I guess. You can also check me out on the good old pat re on as the Phantom Keeper to read my original short stories, open to the public.

Obligatory plug for my crypt of works over.

Have a wonderful day!

PK OUT!