Note: I have edited and added a little more to the previous chapter that will help you understand what is going to be coming up in this story. I also want to thank everyone for their patience. As some of you know I have been dealing with a lot but I am getting better and getting back to writing again. I will also be posting a bonus Christmas story for this story and Fifty Shades of Kings and Queens on here as standalones over the next few days.

Chapter nine

Alice

I sat upstairs in shock with Ana holding my hand on one side and Alesso holding my other and fussing over me on the other. I know that they would all think that I was in shock about what I just witnessed and about what nearly happened but the truth was I was more confused and shocked by my reaction to Cian.

I don't know why but there was something about him that I felt like I knew. His eyes were so familiar but I couldn't pinpoint how. This whole time I hadn't taken a proper look at him until he was getting ready to leave and when I did, I was stunned.

"Are you okay, beautiful?" I turned to Alesso my internal thoughts gone when I saw the concern in Alesso's eyes.

"I'm fine. I promise. I need to go home and check in with my mum and grandmother. It's been a couple of days since I last saw them and I know they will be worried. Plus, as you know my grandmother isn't doing well and I just want to make sure she is okay and see if they need anything. I promise once I know they are both okay I will come back here."

Alesso looked like he was about to refuse and I really didn't want to argue with him. I was too drained for that so I said the only thing that I thought would placate him. "You can drop me off and pick me up. I will leave everything here but I really need to see them."

"Why don't I come in with you? I haven't met them yet. This will be my chance to meet them." I hated to say no but there was something I needed to talk to my mum about and I couldn't do that with Alesso there.

"I want you to meet them and you will. I promise but I just need to see them and have some alone time with them. It's nothing against you I swear. My feelings for you haven't and will never change. I just really need them right now. Plus, my mum and grandmother are proud women so they will want to make sure they and the house look perfect before they meet you." I tried to give him a light-hearted smile to take the sting out of rejecting his offer and it worked a little because his face softened somewhat as he stroked my cheek lovingly.

"Okay, Piccolo but I am dropping you off and picking you up and if you need shopping, I will have what you need brought to you that way you can concentrate on being with your mum and grandmother uninterrupted."

I have never loved Alesso more than right now because knowing that I wouldn't have to leave them even for a moment all day made me feel so much better and lifted my spirits a little.

"Thank you, Alesso. I promise I will be coming back. This isn't me running scared or running away from you. I just need to make sure they are okay and to spend some time with people who don't know what happened today."

"I understand. Why don't you go and get ready I am here whenever you want to go." Gave Alesso a quick kiss before heading up to our room for a quick shower and to get dressed.

Ana

Alesso stared at the door Alice had just walked through and I could see the fear in his eyes. I grabbed his hand, squeezing reassuringly bringing his attention from the door to me.

"She loves you, Alesso. She isn't going to leave you. I don't know how you guys do it but once you fall in love with the Grey family it seems to be impossible to fall out of love. I'm sure if I had a family that I was close to right now I would want to spend some time with them because this has all been a lot to deal with and some normality would be good. Don't take it personally. It's just something she needs right now."

Alesso's shoulders relaxed a little as his eyes went back to the living room door. "I'm scared that she will wake up and realise this isn't the life for her and leave me. I love her. I have fallen so fucking hard for her and it would break me to lose her."

I opened my mouth to reply but was interrupted by Christian who sat beside me and wrapped his arm around me pulling me closer.

"I was scared about the same thing happening with Ana but she has reassured me that she won't leave me we have to believe them, Alesso. I know that falling in love with someone is not just the most incredible thing to have ever happened to us but the most terrifying but we have to trust that when the women we love say that they are here to stay, forever, that they mean it."

I smiled up at Christian and leaned into him a little more. "That's easy for you to say. You and Ana are living together, you're engaged, and you're having a baby. Alice has nothing keeping her here with me." Alesso was looking down at his hands in defeat until a small voice came from the living room door.

"I have you." Alice gave Alesso a sweet smile as he jumped up and walked over to her wrapping her in his arms and I suddenly felt like we were intruding on a very private moment.

"Are you sure I'm enough?"

"You're more than enough. This has been the hardest thing I have ever faced but not once have I imagined not having you in my life. I just really need to be with my mum and grandmother. I swear that's all it is."

Alice

I hated lying to him but until I knew anything I didn't see the point in telling him the whole reason that I wanted to leave. "Are you sure, piccolo?"

"Absolutely." This seemed to put Alesso's mind at ease because the uncertainty left his eyes when he smiled and kissed my forehead. "Are you ready to take me to my grandmothers house?"

"Of course, baby." I turned and said my good byes to everyone before leaving the house and feeling the nerves bubble in my stomach knowing the conversation I was going to have with my mum.

Alesso and I drove in silence as I stared out the window watching the world go by thinking of all the ways I could begin the talk with my mum. Would she be upset? Would she be honest? Or would I find out that my suspicions are completely unfounded? Then there was the possibility that I would find out that my whole life had been a lie and be left with more questions than I already have.

I was so lost in thought that I hadn't realised that we were already at my grandmother's house until Alesso grabbed my hand breaking me out of my thoughts. "We're here, Piccolo. Are you okay?" I took a deep breath and turned to face Alesso giving him my best fake smile.

"I'm fine. I was just watching the world going by thinking about how no one knew what we have just been through or what we have just witnessed. It's a strange feeling seeing the world go on like normal knowing what we know."

I was only partly lying because those thoughts had also been running through my head and I hated that I couldn't tell him the whole truth but I needed to know if there was something that he should know first.

I gave him one last smile and a lingering kiss before I said goodbye and climbed out of the car promising to call if I needed anything or when I was ready to leave.

With one last look back at the car I walked through my grandmother's front door shouting to see where everyone was. "Mum, grandma! It's Alice. Where are you?" I took off my coat and shoes leaving them by the front door.

My grandmother was from an incredibly wealthy family and lived in a huge house but she had suffered in secret over the years with mental health issues, which included hoarding agoraphobia, and since my mum's and my return we had been doing everything, we could to help my grandmother not just with her mental but her physical health.

We had also been trying to get her house organised and repaired as she had done nothing to it over the years so there was a lot to fix. When I told Alesso that my grandmother and mum would want to have the house organised for him to visit this was part of what I was talking about.

The house was a million times better than it had been but I knew that my grandmother would be mortified to have a stranger in her home it was hard enough for her to have us here.

When we first moved back here, I remember how much my heart broke for my grandmother when I saw how she had been living. We had no idea how bad things had gotten for her because anytime we had been on video call she had always been in the same place and we could see nothing but the wall behind her and her. And she always looked fine.

Anytime we had asked to visit her she had made excuses and we never wanted to force ourselves on her. It wasn't until the day that she called us and told us that she was very sick not just physically but mentally and she explained her situation and how bad things had been for her.

My mum and I sat up that night while we made our plans to move back the following day. I remember crying with my mum not just because my heart was broken for my grandmother but because I knew how much strength it would have taken for her to ask us for help.

She had told us that she hadn't said anything because she was ashamed and that shame had grown and become so overwhelming that the thought of asking anyone for help was so bad that it would make her physically sick but now that her physical health was so bad, she was scared.

I was so proud of my grandmother. She was my hero for having the courage to ask for help when you were so scared. I'm not sure if I would have the strength to do what she did but I was so glad that she did.

While we had no idea how bad things were until we arrived, we vowed to help and I didn't care what we had to do we would stop at nothing to give my grandmother the last few months, weeks, days, or years she deserved.

We spent months once we moved in emptying room after room and cleaning each one as we went until we came to a point where we could invite people in to do much-needed repairs keeping them away from my grandmother who still didn't want to be around anyone she didn't know and we didn't want to push her. This was her journey and we had to go at her pace doing what was right for her.

The last room that would need repairs was the front room my grandmother sadly had made her bedroom she had been sleeping on her sofa for over two years and that for some reason was the hardest part of all of this because she had been in so much pain, she had been unable to move enough to make it to her bedroom.

She had suffered so much in silence for so long and I had made a vow the day she reached out to us that no matter what she would never have to deal with any of this alone again. I didn't care how much she tried to push us away which she often did because she was having a bad day. I would give her the space she needed but I would never leave her.

These past few days being away from her I had driven my mum insane with the texts and phone calls but I didn't care. If I couldn't be there in person then I would check in as much as possible.

I entered the front room to the laughter of my mum and grandmother which instantly lifted my spirits especially when my grandmother saw me and gave me a beaming smile.

"Oh, sweetheart. Where have you been? I have missed you so much." I walked over to my grandmother and gave her a big hug before doing the same with my mum.

"Didn't I tell you, mum? Our Ally here has a new man. She is being very secretive about him though but it would seem she is head over heels."

"Oh, dear. Why didn't you tell me? That's so wonderful. Tell me all about him. What does he do? Where does he live?"

I loved the enthusiasm of my grandmother. When she smiled the way, she was she looked so much younger than the eighty-nine years that she was. My grandmother was incredibly beautiful when she was younger with long strawberry blonde hair and pale green eyes, she often told me she was quite a hit with the fellas. Though, she was madly in love with my grandfather and had been until the day he passed away when my grandmother was eighty-two years old. So, none of the men that fought for her attention stood a chance.

"He is wonderful. Very handsome. Very tall. He works in his family business and he lives in New York but he is looking for a place here. His brother and sister have houses around the corner from here so he is staying at his brother's right now until he finds a place of his own. He is dying to meet you but I have told him that will only happen when you're ready which he totally respects. You will love him though."

I had to make sure she knew that I wouldn't invite him here to meet her the second I saw the fear flash in her eyes. "I am so sorry, darling. I'm just not ready to have people in here yet. I…" I grabbed my grandmother's hand and gave her a reassuring smile interrupting her unnecessary apology.

"Grandma, you have nothing to apologise for. I will never invite anyone here until you are ready. You need to concentrate on yourself and getting better nothing else matters. You can meet him whenever you're ready you can even meet him over video call if that's more comfortable for you."

My grandmother gave me a sweet smile and a nod of her head. "Okay, who wants a cup of tea?" I sighed before both my grandmother and I replied in unison. "Oh god, yes please."

"I'll be right back." My mum left the room and my grandma relaxed back on the sofa.

"Now that your mum has gone how are you doing, really, Alice? You look tired."

"I'm fine it's nothing bad we just spend a lot of time talking at night. His brother's house is very busy during the day so nighttime is really when we get the most time to talk. Plus, I work for his brother so a lot of the time I am working. You know what it's like at the beginning, grandma. You want to spend every minute getting to know each other and a lot of the time sleep gets ignored."

I knew I was lying and I forced a fake smile and laugh which seemed to convince my grandmother and the worry slipped away much to my relief.

"Ah, yes. I remember those days very well. Your grandfather and I would spend many nights talking until the sun came up. I miss those days." My grandmother smiled off into the distance no doubt remembering my grandfather and it made me wish I could have known them both when they were younger.

She had told me so many stories about how they met and fell in love and it was like this beautiful fairy tale that most people dream of.

We had been talking for hours about the next stage of renovations on the house when my grandmother informed us that she was feeling tired and wanted a sleep so my mother and I made sure she was comfortable before leaving the room and going to the room we were currently working on cleaning after emptying it.

I knew now, before my grandmother woke up was the opportunity for me to ask my mum the questions, I had for her. So, I decided not to waste any time. "Mum. Can we sit down and talk, please?" My mum turned to face me with a bunch of paperwork in her hand frowning before placing the paperwork back on the desk.

"Sure, sweetheart. Is everything okay?" I took a deep breath and then moved the boxes that were covering the seats on the nearest sofa so that we could sit down. As soon as I took my seat my mum made her way over and sat beside me.

"Mum, I need to ask you about my father." I didn't miss the fear that flashed in my mother's eyes when I mentioned my father.

"I'm not sure what more I can tell you about him, sweetheart. He died when you were a baby and we weren't together when he passed away."

"Why weren't you together?"

"Well, if I'm honest, it was because he got back with his wife. He was separated when I met him but only a week after I was with him, they got back together. He didn't want anything to do with us because he didn't want to ruin his marriage so I moved away and found out shortly after you were born that he passed away."

This was more than my mum had ever told me about my father but there was something about the fact that she wouldn't make eye contact with me that told me she wasn't being entirely honest with me.

I had never asked questions about my father because my mother had always been enough for me as had my grandparents but now things had changed and I didn't just want to know more I needed to.

"What was he called?" My mother stood abruptly and began fussing with the paperwork again so I walked over to her and slammed my hand down stopping her. "I deserve to know, um."

"Why? Why do you want to know all this now? You have never wanted to know about him before so why all of a sudden has all this come back up?" I had never seen my mum mad at me but right now not only was she raising her voice but she was shaking as she let go of the papers and stepped away from me.

"I only want to know his name, mum. Why is that so hard for you to tell me? Unless he never actually died."

"You think I'm lying to you?" My mother looked furious but I could also see a hint of fear in her eyes.

"Did you?"

"I'm not discussing this. I have told you all I am willing to tell you about your father. He never wanted anything to do with us so why would you want to find out about him." The thought of my father not wanting anything to do with me broke my heart a little but something told me things weren't that simple.

I knew as long as my mother thought that I didn't believe that she was telling the truth she would remain tight-lipped about my father. So, I changed tactics.

"I'm sorry, mum. It's not that I don't believe you. It's just that I was listening to Alesso and his family talking about their dad and Ana talking about her biological father. Who sounds like an awful man and it hit me that I know nothing about mine. I don't even know his first name. I was just curious and was lashing out at you when you got so defensive. Of course, I believe that he passed away. I'm sorry."

I turned away from my mother and started going through one of the boxes hoping that she would believe what I said but when she stayed so quiet, I sighed feeling defeated. That was until she said a sentence that would change everything.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I only know your father's first name and that's the truth." My heart sped up as I turned around and faced her waiting for her next words. And when she spoke it took every ounce of strength not to show my shock.

"Your father's name was Cian. I swear that's all I know about him."

Cian

When I arrived home, I found my wife sitting in our daughter's room holding a toy she'd had from the day we brought her home from the hospital. The little pink bear was old and tattered but it still smelled of Siobhan. I knew this because when my wife was asleep at night, I would often come in here to do what my wife was doing right now.

It was the only time I would allow the tears to flow over the death of our beloved daughter.

"Hi, my love." When my wife heard my voice, she looked up and my heart broke when the tears flowed freely from her red-rimmed eyes.

"Are they dead?"

"Yes, they are."

"Good. We can finally lay our angel to rest." I watched as my wife placed the bear gently down on our daughter's bed and stood to leave the room stopping to give me a brief kiss before leaving me to look around at the room.

I smiled as I looked around the room filled with all things yellow. Siobhan had begged for a yellow room and we had compromised to make it cream and yellow so that it wasn't overwhelming.

Siobhan being the independent, stubborn little lady that she was at the age of ten years old had insisted on being in on the design meetings with her mum and she had been very opinionated on what she had wanted and given that we had fought so hard to have her she was so beyond loved she always got what she wanted.

We put up a little bit of a fight so that it wasn't so easy for her to get her way because we thought that would stop her from becoming an entitled child and it seemed to work because as much as we gave her everything, she was also the most loving, respectful, caring, beautiful soul.

With one last lingering look I gently closed the door and made my way to my office taking a seat behind the massive I had specially made to intimidate anyone who sat opposite me.

I poured myself a glass of scotch uncaring that it was still the morning. I was going through enough to justify the large drink I held in my hand. After I emptied the glass, I placed it down and picked up my phone.

When the phone on the other end was picked up, I spoke before anyone could ask who I was. "Carla, it's Cian. Do you have a minute to chat?"

"Oh, Cian. Of course, I do. Is everything, Okay?" I could hear the concern in Carla's voice and given that I just left her and after what we had just done, I guess I could see why she would be concerned about why I would be calling her. No doubt, she probably thought I had more demands.

"Don't worry, Carla it's nothing bad I just need some help."

"Oh, okay. What can I do for you?" I could hear the relief and sighed. Carla and I had been great friends for as long as I can remember and I hated the strain this had put on our friendship. One day we would get past this but right now the bitterness about my daughter losing her life at Carla's home is stopping me from moving forward.

Maybe once, my baby girl is laid to rest that will make it easier to move forward but for now this is the best of our friendship that I can give her. "I need some information on Alice. There is something about her that seems so familiar and I just want to check something."

"No problem. I'm sure that Christian would be more than happy to send you over whatever you want to know."

"No, Carla. I don't want Christian or any of them to know. I want this kept between us. Just for now until I know if there is something that needs to be shared with anyone else. Can you do that?"

"Absolutely. Should we be concerned about her?"

"No. Not at all. I just need to see if what I am thinking is right or if I am barking up the wrong tree. She is no danger to anyone."

"Leave it with me I will have information for you within the hour." I loved this about Carla. She was the best person to get information from because she was respected by most if not all the families in this lifestyle and those that didn't respect her feared her.

"Thank you, Carla. I look forward to any information you can give me." Carla and I said our goodbyes and hung up and I spent the next hour trying to get some work done but I was far too preoccupied with what I might find out about Alice.

The phone rang only once before I answered it. "Cian, it's Carla. I just wanted to let you know that I have emailed all the information to you that I can find on her. She comes from a very prominent family so a lot of information about them is a little harder to get to but if you need more I can keep digging."

"Thank you, Carla. I have got it from here I just needed the basics so that I can start my own digging if it's needed. If there is anything for you to know I will let you know." I thanked Carla once more and hung up the phone impatient to see what she found out.

I opened the email skimming over the bits that were unimportant until I came to a picture of Alice smiling and carefree. Which in turn made me smile. I got to the information on Alice and read it eager to learn everything I could. Her name is Alison Bancroft. Born twenty-five years ago. She is an only child. No father is named. She lived alone with her mum until not long ago when they moved in with her grandmother.

I frowned recognising her last night but was unable to put my finger on it until I came across a picture of Alice's mother and my heart dropped and everything clicked into place.

I knew her mother very fucking well and suddenly the familiarity when I looked at Alice made so much sense. As did the reason she looked so much like Siobhan. Siobhan was my twin and so was Alice.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! She was my fucking daughter! I may not have DNA results in front of me I knew without a doubt she was mine!

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