Dear journal,
It's finally finished. All the preparations are in order. The only thing that's left for me to do is figure out what to have for lunch. Can't go carrying out the doom of humanity on an empty stomach now, can I? That and what I should say to Zim when I present my business proposal to him...
I've always had a grudging amount of respect for the object my extraterrestrial obssesion. And it'll be through his eyes that I'll finally find my greatest satisfaction. He'll recognize me for what I've become and that together, we can take over this planet... without help from his race or anyone else! He'll know that I'm more than the fanatical agent from the Swollen Eyeballs, more than Professor Membrane's failure of a son, more than the 'weird kid' the malingering, mattress-soiling, sub-literate morons at school always made me out to be. We can join forces, and then we can rule the world!
...Or maybe not. Our rivalry might already be too deeply rooted for that.
Either way, I don't care.
Nothing in all the world matters more to me right now than my victory over the rest of humanity. I'll hear them surrender. I'll hear them beg forgiveness and say that they were wrong. I'll hear them proclaim me as the greatest human to have ever lived among them, including my legendary father!
Then I'll stomp them all flat.
It wasn't until recently that I came to understand how deep my hatred for humanity ran. I knew I hated a lot of them, but I also knew that somewhere out there were good people. I knew there were those who didn't torment and shun the black sheep, those who didn't call people crazy for saying the Earth was round or that aliens exist, and those who didn't stand back and laugh as they watched testosterone-high sadists push the boundaries of their fellow human's pain and suffering. However, the closest I'd ever come to meeting such people were the disgruntled sister and workaholic father that I called family.
Even then, for years my feelings toward humanity were more along the lines of wanting to 'prove them wrong', of wanting to hear them admit they should have listened to me! But now, I'm done making excuses for their selfishness. The good they do for the sake of humanity is all just a guise to gain control, to impose their own twisted version of Utopia upon the world. They're not much different from the alien invaders after all.
I wonder if Zim's seen the same truth about his own people? I've eavesdropped on more than a few conversations between him and his leaders, and it amazes me how much obvious contempt they have for him. Yet he remains convinced that he's the greatest invader they'd ever known. Sometimes I envy that unshakable belief he has in himself, that ability to reject harsh reality and impose his own. Ruthless as our relationship has been, at least I can say with absolute certainty that I was important to him. He realized that, without me, his mission and glory meant nothing. I reached the same conclusion in my pursuit of "Real Science".
Despite his embarrasingly low success rate, I know Zim's not stupid. Egotistical, yes. He's impatient, impulsive, loud, zealous, dramatic, and he's got some problems getting priorities straight. He's an alien from an advanced race, with access to a universe of power, yet he stays in school all day, enduring it, hating it, and fearing it. The thought of sneaking out or setting a robot in his place never crosses his mind. He gets so caught up with the most unimportant details that he ends up getting nothing done. He gets a giant robot, and his plan is to go beat me up with it. He's in control of some impressive stuff, but his sense of control is so horrible that it doesn't matter if his plans are foolproof.
This would be where I come in, to redirect Zim's death machines when they get off track.
But if not, then so be it. I'll rain doom in my own way. I will enjoy the sweetness of the looks on my fellow human's faces when I deliver to them the end of their world as they've known it!
Hmm... I think I'll have a light salad.
-End Dib's Log
