Chapter 40
Asch was working on a plan to use the Sephiroth to raise the Tartarus back up to the Outer Lands. Teodoro said that there was still enough power left in the Sephiroth at Akzeriuth to do that, if only once.
The plan succeeded. Asch, Jade, Natalia, Anise, Raine, Ion...and Guy-all of them made it safely back to the Outer Lands inside the Tartarus.
Asch wants to head to Belkend. Apparently there's a fon machine laboratory there that Master Van's been using, and Asch wants to find out what he's up to.
So I really was tricked and betrayed by Master Van... I have no idea why he wanted to make me destroy Akzeriuth. Maybe it would be best to try and find out, like Asch says.
Everyone else on the Tartarus wanted to return to their homelands, but they ended up deciding to work with Asch for a while. They're heading east to Belkend now.
There really wasn't much to do at the weapons station, so Guy explored the different functions available on the screen without much fervor. He still couldn't fathom how these screens worked where all he had to do was touch them and move windows around and stuff happened. The Tartarus would do whatever he told it to! Simply incredible. But after this long on the Tartarus, there wasn't much more to distract him and he sat back in his chair. Natalia sat next to him at the defense station looking bored while Asch and Anise were on the other side with Ion at the radar and navigation stations. Jade stood at his usual spot at the helm and Raine sat reading her book in the corner. Guy settled on watching her for a few minutes.
When Asch announced that he wanted someone at the main stations, Raine somehow was nowhere to be found. Guy chalked it up to her not wanting to sit with him because she returned after the Tartarus got moving. Then she chose a spot in the far corner where she found the best natural lighting. As usual, she had the map out and wrote all over everything. She was probably the only one on board that Tartarus that managed to keep herself entertained the whole time they traveled. She was definitely a scholar.
She really was beautiful.
The way her main bang swooped off to the side and the rest of her hair framed her face and yet the ends defied gravity by curving up. The way her grey eyes followed every stroke she wrote or every word she read. Her mind was always busy, he could tell. If only he could know what was going on there.
All he knew was how much she didn't trust him. Hearing that had been quite a blow. He thought he had gained some trust from her, from the things she'd told him and only him. He was the safest person to ask about Tethe'alla and he knew stories that she'd told no one else. So what was it?
As if sensing his watch, Raine snapped the book shut with the map as a bookmark, returned it to her bag, and left the bridge with all of her stuff in tow. Huh. Well, that was abrupt. He ignored the feeling that she had noticed him staring and settled on hoping she was hungry. At the very least, Guy himself was. Maybe he should take a break and go to the cafeteria and get something to eat now that they've restocked it a little.
He turned back to the screen. But to leave now would leave the wrong impression. If she truly felt the way she did, Guy didn't want Raine to think he was following her just in case she really was headed for lunch. He scanned the screen, then up at the window above his screen. In the Qliphoth, outside had nothing to see but storms and purple. Now it was all blue with some clouds. The blue sky felt much safer than the purple one, but Guy still felt the unease of traveling with a known enemy.
Over his shoulder, he glanced back to Asch. How did this happen? Asch had chased them and threatened their lives several times before now, but now he was all about working together with them. Sure, the point was to find out what Van was up to, something they all wanted to know, but still, Guy didn't trust him a whit. He told him as much when Asch approached him in Yulia City. The one Guy trusted was left behind.
Unconscious and unaware of what they were all doing. Unaware that everyone went to the surface without him. What if he woke up while they were all gone? Would he believe Tear if she said they'd be back for him? At least, Guy had plans to go back to retrieve him. How would he get back down there anyway? Yulia City was so far underground.
"So Yulia City is miles below us, huh..."
"Guy..." Natalia heard him and apparently seized on the opportunity to ignore her boring computer station. She pulled back and settled her hands on her lap. "Are you thinking about Luke?"
"Huh?" Was he that obvious? "Well... yeah, I guess. Everyone but Tear's back up here. I'm worried he'll think he's been abandoned. After all this, he still needs me to help him along." He reached up and moved some of the windows around on his screen. Nothing to really look at but he might as well change it up a little anyway.
"That's some ego you have, Guy!" Natalia huffed. Guy bumped the back of his head against the seat and found himself watching the ceiling instead. He knew that tone. Natalia used that tone anytime someone said or did something she thought was improper. "Besides, you were too lenient with Luke in the first place. The rest of us were quite shocked at his irresponsible remarks." Not that I wasn't, too… he thought. But he couldn't argue with her about being too lenient.
"But he's a replica, so... it's partially my fault he's grown up the way he has over the past seven years... and partly yours too, Natalia."
At that, she went silent. Of course, it wasn't something he realized until Luke turned to him for support when he denied responsibility for Akzeriuth, but it was a truth nonetheless. "Yes... perhaps you're right." Natalia relented, slumping in her own seat, or at least as much as a proper princess can slump. "As you say, Luke may be in need of someone to support him right now." Then she sat up straight and glanced over her shoulder. "But what of Asch, then? Who is to support him, after seven years of loss? Isn't that our job as well?"
He turned, too, and saw Asch's red head poking up above his seat. That was true… As much as Guy didn't trust Asch, he couldn't deny how going so long without his family and home might have affected him. It couldn't have been easy being uprooted like that, especially by someone he had trusted. "I suppose you have a point..." As far less appealing as it was. Guy had gotten used to Luke, gotten to know him really well. But Asch was that little soldier that Guy watched grow up the first few years except now he had the title and the skills to back it up. Everything Duke Fabre probably wanted in his son, Guy was sure. Knowing that Asch was really the Duke's original son somehow brought back some of the memories and hurt from the time before Guy decided to let things go.
"Guy?" Natalia began. "It's not just Luke, is it?"
"What are you talking about?" He really didn't know.
"I noticed you and Raine had some distance between you at Yulia City and you've been here at the station since we left. You two used to visit all the time. Did something happen?"
"Nah, everything's okay. She was just distracted by the ruins…." That was mostly true. Guy waved at the monitor. "And here… I'm busy with this." What a lame excuse. Even Luke would've seen through it and sure enough, Natalia frowned at catching him in a lie. But the memory of Raine walking with Natalia past him and Asch without so much as glancing at them, Guy knew he'd done something wrong at some point. He just wished he knew what it was. He sighed and smiled at best he could with the last of Raine's words still hanging on his mind. She still can't trust him; she slapped him in the face with it. Whether she was genuinely mad at him, he wasn't sure but he decided she might want a little more space.
Natalia knew better. That look in her eye told him so and paired with that tilt to her head, he might as well have confessed Raine didn't trust him. Almost as if to say she would be more entertained by the screen, Natalia turned and played with the windows, scrolling through them just to have something to tinker with. Finally, she said, "I think she looks less lonely when you two talk."
"Yeah, but…" Now that Natalia opened that floodgate, he found himself saying more than he really wanted to. "Raine is a fortress and there's nothing I can do to ease her mind. She is actually afraid I might kill her even though I don't have a reason to."
At that, Natalia's face softened though she never took her eyes off the screen. "Maybe she's afraid of what we know about elves."
"What do you mean?" Guy asked, genuinely curious. "Elves don't exist." Surely Natalia still didn't believe that, did she? She sounded serious. She checked to see if anyone was listening and then lowered her voice and leaned closer. Not that it meant much with the space between the seats.
"You don't know that," she replied. "We've never seen them because they're not in the Score. They know what would happen if they revealed themselves to us." Well, Guy supposed that was a valid point. If it were true.
"How could they hide so effectively, though? After how much time, you'd think we would've seen them by now."
Natalia nodded. "She said it would cause so many problems if humans knew where to find them." She lowered her to tone to a softer whisper. "But Anise said that elves had a certain kind of magic. You never know what they're capable of. What if she's afraid of you finding out something like that?"
Like what…? Confused, Guy didn't respond but for a small nod.
"And besides," she continued as if he had vocalized his disagreement, "Raine clearly doesn't believe she can trust anyone. I think it could be related to her being an elf and since elves aren't in the Score… well, nothing else makes sense."
He picked up Natalia's idea of playing with the windows on the screen, creating some kind of stupid game with no rules. Actually, her reasons did explain that. She was terrified of not being in the Score, but… if elves were real, where had they been until now? Either way, that didn't matter. "She's a good person, though.… We have nothing more to fear of her than she has of us."
"I know that, but what if she's afraid of what humans can do? Or more accurately, will do?"
He dropped his hands from the screen. "But I'm not like that!" Oops, that was a little loud. He felt more than saw everyone else's attention draw. Frustrated, Guy grunted and asked in a lower voice, "Doesn't anyone see that?" He sank a little in his chair. Hearing Natalia echo what Raine said, he really started to second-guess himself. Maybe he really was still a bad person. No, of course he wasn't; he had let go of his anger a long time ago. At least… his anger at Duke Fabre. But why would knowing Raine's secret mean that he would kill her? She wasn't somehow related to Duke Fabre or what happened, was she? No, that was silly. She feared him even before she found out what happened to Guy's family.
"Of course we do, Guy." Natalia replied in a whisper.
"Then what is there to fear of me?" He matched her volume.
"Why not just ask her?"
"She keeps shutting down on me."
"Then keep trying. Perhaps you haven't said the right thing to her yet."
Said the right thing? The more that Guy thought about it, the more confused he became. What was the right thing to say? He'd tried just about everything he could think of. He'd tried putting her mind at ease verbally. He'd tried walking with her silently. He'd tried giving her space. He'd tried being close. He'd tried listening to her. He'd even tried casual conversation and idle chat. Sure, she'd responded little by little, but with everything he's tried, there was still something else he wasn't doing right?!
"Actually," Natalia began thoughtfully, "what kinds of things do you two talk about? Has she mentioned the elven village?"
She… what? Elven village?
Guy couldn't answer. He dropped his hands to his lap, no longer interested in fiddling with the windows on his screen. Not only did Natalia believe in the elves, Raine actually perpetuated it by talking about where the elves lived?! But… Raine wasn't an elf!
Was she?
Elves were a myth, weren't they? How could that be true? But it really did explain a lot….
"Oh, I'm sorry… it seems she hasn't." Natalia chewed her lip at his lack of reply. "I wasn't supposed to say anything, but I thought with as much as you two have spent time together, I thought she would've said something to you." But there it was… Raine told Natalia and secret and asked her not to share it with anyone else….
Not even him? Guy deflated in his seat. It felt like every effort he put into putting her mind at ease was wasted. Unless the women spent more time than he thought talking when they all spent a night at the inn. But Raine didn't hang out with them when they were all together; why would that change at the inns?
And yet here Raine had told her about the elven village. A village in the woods? Raine claimed to be an elf. Guy sat up again. What was the implication of that? The elven village… She didn't! Did she?
"Wait, you mean the village where she was born?"
Natalia tilted her head in confusion. "Yes. I know where it is."
DAMN IT! Guy grit his teeth. How much had he talked with Raine and she never told him about that? All he knew was that Raine mentioned a village in the woods. And yet Natalia knows where it is?! It was all he could do to contain himself. He stood up and headed for the doorway.
"Wait, Guy!"
He ignored her and how everyone else turned to look at him. Jade smirked as Guy passed.
"My, what does it take to get you riled?"
Guy shook his head as he stormed from the room, almost going in circles from the stress of his anger. Damn that Jade. And Raine! How come she told Natalia something like that and not him?!
"Please, wait." Natalia followed him down the stairs and into the main deck hallway, her heels clanging on the stairs to announce every step. They only increased his irritation.
"Why can't she trust me?" Guy nearly screamed as he turned around. Natalia stepped back and held her hand to her mouth. "I have spent hours visiting with her, consoling her, supporting her, and how much has she told me about herself? And you come along and she tells you one of her secrets?!"
At that, Natalia huffed, her hands on her hips. "Maybe she just doesn't feel like she knows you well enough. Besides, look at how you're acting now! Do you really think she'd tell you something like that if this is how you respond?"
"What? No, that's not it." How he was acting now? He was frustrated! He hadn't always been frustrated. "I've never told her off for something she told me."
"But how much have you told her about you?"
What? Guy clenched his fists. That couldn't be it, either. "More than she's told me about her!"
"Well, clearly it's not enough," Natalia replied hotly, "because she would tell you more if you opened up about yourself."
"Are you kidding me?" Guy snapped. "I've tried that! It meant nothing to her." He scoffed, and took off down the hall, almost running from the injustice of it. Then he stopped and faced Natalia again. "You know what? Despite the experience you've obviously had, it's not that easy, you know. The woman is impossible! I mean, seriously, how much effort did you have to put in to learn where she was born?" Actually, maybe she did put in some effort, but Guy didn't care about that. Still, the nerve of Natalia accusing him of not opening up?! Was she serious?
"There has to be something she's uncomfortable with. You two have talked so much, I'm surprised she hasn't shared that with you, too."
"Yeah, right. You're not the only one surprised. Where is it then? Or are you not allowed to say?" Even as he said it, he already knew what the answer was. The feeling soured more than the taste of lemons.
Natalia pursed her lips. Guy nodded. Of course. She was sworn to secrecy. She did say that. But then Natalia looked down, pointed straight up, avoiding eye contact as she did. "But you didn't hear it from me," she said in a low voice. "In fact, you didn't hear it at all."
Guy rolled his eyes up to the ceiling. What did that mean? Inflamed all over again, Guy threw his own hands into the air. "Enough with the damn puzzles!"
Natalia sighed. "I'm sorry." She really looked it. He'd never seen her hang her head so low in shame.
"Never mind." Guy left, feeling sour and angry. He'd been thinking about it all along, what it could be about Martel that Raine thought was so heinous he'd kill her and then to find out Natalia had learned where the elves lived—no, where Raine was born—and he was the one spending so much time getting to know her! Raine was just a person as far as he could tell. But ignoring whether elves lived in that village or not, Raine had told Natalia where it was, where she lived as a little girl before mom and dad abandoned her and Genis. Raine trusted Natalia more than she trusted him!
As he stomped down the hallway to find a room, he pulled out his list of notes about Raine and studied it for any kind of meaning that he knew it wouldn't share. Why didn't she trust him? His reading stopped at one word: Rheaird…. He looked up at the ceiling again. The sky. Was Natalia trying to say that Raine came from the sky? After all, the Outer Lands were raised above the Qliphoth; maybe there was land even higher than that. He supposed that might fit, but… Martel didn't fit anywhere in this explanation. A woman who should be famous but wasn't… how was that supposed to be a satisfying answer?!
The whole point of telling her his own secret was to get some kind of explanation from her! Something, anything, that made any kind of sense. And sure, she was willing to tell him this much, but it meant nothing meaningful to him. That's why she agreed to say it. That's why he could hear that much. And now Raine knew the one secret Guy didn't want anyone to know. The hypocrisy of it fueled his energy until he just couldn't stand it anymore. Why did she think he would kill her over something like Martel?!
He crunched the paper in his fist and stuffed it into his pocket.
If the village in the woods she came from was on land in the sky, at least that would explain "the world over". It was literal. But if she told Natalia something like that, why would that mean she should still be afraid of him?
The Tartarus sailed the ocean at a fast clip, but it still took time to travel to Belkend. For the first time since she fell overboard, Raine enjoyed the trip on the water. The sunshine, clouds, a distant storm… she welcomed all of it. Even the ocean sounded pleasing. The best part was that she was nowhere near the water. She couldn't even feel the waves. If she fell from this perch, she'd land flat-faced on a deck, even if it hurt a lot more than the waves would. So much better.
Let alone that even the ocean eclipsed the terror of the Qliphoth.
Yes, she decided, this is the way to travel the seas. As much as she enjoyed the Tartarus, she needed to get her Rheaird fixed up so she could go home. She already wasted so much time going with everyone to Akzeriuth, as necessary as the trip initially was for her safety. She just needed to bide her time. They're headed to Belkend and from there, she should be able to get a ship to Sheridan. Though as close to Belkend as Sheridan was, Raine wondered if Asch would be willing to drop her off there on the way.
Actually, that sounded like a good idea.
Perhaps she'd ask him. She picked up her bag and pulled her staff from its lean against the rail and left the upper deck to wander back towards the bridge. However, when she arrived, she noticed someone was missing. Jade stood at the helm, Natalia and Ion sat at one side, Asch and Anise at the other, but Guy was nowhere. Ion threw some worried glances at Natalia who had her arms and legs crossed. It almost looked like she was glaring at the screen with the way her foot tapped the air. She definitely didn't pay any attention to her station and sometimes glared at the seat next to her, though Raine could tell it wasn't directed at Ion. Did something happen? Come to think of it, she hadn't seen much of Guy lately, outside of him sitting at one of the stations. Usually he's exploring if he's not on the bridge, but she ran into him eventually. In fact… he hadn't approached her since… well, since before they arrived in Yulia City.
A worried feeling lurched in her stomach.
Without saying a word to anyone, Raine left the bridge. Where would Guy be? Now that they knew no one was haunting the Tartarus, they had chosen rooms. Perhaps she could try the one he chose first. His was across the hall and a few doors down from hers, but when she knocked, he didn't answer. Or maybe he was hungry and went to the cafeteria.
No, he wasn't there.
Or the lavatory? She'd have to knock at every single one. That'd take too much time to check there…. With each place she checked and failed to find him, Raine felt more nervous. Was something wrong? Maybe he was tinkering with something somewhere. The Tartarus didn't run the same since it fell into the Qliphoth, but everywhere she knew to check, she couldn't hear anyone moving around or working on stuff.
Maybe the lounge?
She opened the door and saw a familiar arm draped over the back of the closest of two couches and she exhaled a breath of relief. His gloved hand simply hung there, but he had to be breathing. There weren't any enemies on this ship to threaten anyone.
"I was going to ask Jade to holler over speakers for you if I couldn't find you anywhere," Raine joked. But then he didn't reply. Nor did the hand move. Uh oh. Was he really not okay after all? "Guy?" She asked she leaned her staff against the wall by the door and then stepped closer to him. Finally, the arm slid back over the couch and he sat up. The look on his face confirmed the worried squirm in her gut.
"Hi, Raine." For once, he wore a serious expression, and she could see the hurt in his eyes, as much as she heard in her name. Just the one look spoke volumes to her. He sank back onto the couch, but she found herself frozen to the spot. Yes, he was upset with her about something. She thought back to the last conversation they had that involved more than just "please pass the pork cutlets" and a wave flushed through her when she realized it. The last time she had spoken to him, really spoken to him, she had flat-out said she couldn't trust him. No wonder he'd been keeping his distance!
Embarrassed, she blushed. "That... was kind of a rude way to leave, wasn't it? I'm sorry." Her bag felt too heavy and she dropped it on the floor by her staff.
He sat up, properly this time. "Did you mean it? You can't trust me?"
"Well…."
"Why not?"
Raine didn't answer. Instead she found herself choking on words. On air, actually. She'd let him stew like this for a few days now without any kind of explanation. Of course he'd be a little mad. But the truth…?
"So, is it true that elves live in a village in the sky?" He asked with a sharp tone. "Or was that just a story for Natalia's sake?"
… Wait, what? Natalia told him about that? Raine suppressed a groan and closed her eyes. Didn't she tell her not to say anything to anyone?! Great. But still, she wrung her hands and opened her eyes again. "Who else did she tell?"
"You can't truly believe I would kill you, do you?" He stood up off of the couch. Oh, she wished she could borrow his mobility. "After all this time? You think all of this time we traveled together means we're enemies?"
Raine didn't know what to say. Of course not! Having someone around who gave a damn, especially in such an unfamiliar world, had no equal since she was a little girl with Mom and Dad. Her mouth went dry. Natalia wasn't supposed to tell anyone about this. So why did she? This was the exact thing she was hoping to avoid. Now, it couldn't be helped. "You said you wouldn't ask."
"I'm not talking about the past, Raine. I'm talking about right now." She watched his arms wave in wide gestures as he nearly threw his hands in the air. "How can you tell Natalia where you were born and then stand there and tell me I would hurt you for knowing that, too?"
"No, it's not for reasons you think." She took a step back.
"Why won't you tell me any straight answers?"
"I'm truly sorry, Guy, but I can't…." Her heart began beating heavily in her chest and not just from the adrenaline. One way or another, he was going to learn the truth. What should she do? Think, Raine! There must be something she can say that won't endanger her with the natives. But with the disappointment on his face, the way his eyebrows knitted together, her mind went completely blank.
"Can't you at least tell me why?" He stepped to the side of the couch, but there was something about his distance that seemed… wider. "Why can't you trust me?"
Perhaps she could, but… No, that wasn't it. She shook her head. "I do trust you, Guy," she said. "What I can't trust is everyone's reaction to me. That's why I told her—"
"Reaction? If you care so much about our reaction, why are you perpetuating these lies about being an elf? Why are you telling Natalia things you wouldn't tell me?"
That wasn't it, though… How could she correct him on it? She didn't want to lie. "I… Guy, I…" What should she say? She struggled to even find random words to string together, let alone anything that made sense.
"Stop being so afraid of us. Of me." Finally, he came closer to her. "Can't you tell me anything that will help me understand?" He hesitated before adding, "I mean, a direct answer. Just… why?"
Raine couldn't think of anything. No matter what she said, he'd only understand if she told him the truth about being an alien of Auldrant. Could she really afford that? But she stepped back and clasped a hand on the door for comfort, no, for stability. "I'm…" she let out a breath and closed her eyes. "I'm not a replica."
"What?" He stared at her.
Bewildered, he pulled something from his pocket and looked it over. The crumpled paper certainly had seen better days. Wait a minute. Was that paper about her?! Of course! His memory was too flighty, he had to write everything down. Damn it! But her flash of anger died the instant he lifted his eyes from the paper to her. The confusion on his face said it all. If she wasn't a replica, he had no idea what she was. "But… how can everything be true? Have you lied about everything? About Martel? You can't mean to tell me you really are an elf?" He shook his head as he continued reading the paper.
Her heart broke at not being able to answer, but her body shivered from the thought of telling him. She stared, wide-eyed with horror as if seeing Akzeriuth for a second time, and her fingers squeezed at the door until she couldn't feel them anymore. He was going to demand answers out of her, wasn't he? How would he take the truth? Could she really trust that he wouldn't hurt her?
But myriad experiences screamed at her about all the times, all of the humans who turned on the wind and went from friends to enemies in a heartbeat. That usually happened when they learned the truth.
Then he looked up at her. "You really are an elf? From a village in the sky?"
Raine held her breath. She wanted to say yes, and she'd told people she was an elf for so long, it was natural to do so. So why was it so hard to say it now? Tears stung her eyes.
She hated lying to him. About her blood, about her village. This was the perfect explanation if she could actually convince him it was true. With Natalia believing it, he was more likely to believe it himself. She could still cover up the truth and there'd be no harm. But as her heart beat louder and faster at the mere thought of lying to him so specifically, she realized she couldn't do it. But the truth….
If anyone in Auldrant learned the truth, well, it wouldn't be the same as finding out Sheena was from another world, that was for sure.
Suddenly, his expression changed, the anger and tension easing away into a sudden realization.
Oh, no. What now?
Her chin quivered. It was the only part of her that wasn't frozen stiff.
Guy frowned at his list.
She wasn't a replica after all. What did that mean? She couldn't be an elf, though, could she? They didn't exist! But she told him that she claimed to be an elf to hide what she really was. That part had to be true. So why continue lying about being an elf? But what was she really if she truly thought he would kill her? He read through the list one more time, but just like before, seeing it through the lens that she's not a replica, she just didn't make any sense. But if he thought of her as an elf… some of it could've made sense except elves didn't exist! What was going on here?!
Raine
Born in a village in the woods – where?
From Radessia? – I doubt it
Paranoid, highly guarded
Eckspheres ? – studied by Class I? But DON'T ask about them.
Stole Re-ard – flying machine, not the same as Albiore, why different name? Stolen from Class M? Might not be true. Doesn't want Albiore. What's the difference?
Has significant control over fonons – solid understanding of artes and magic – why couldn't she use fonons even though she had such fine skills?
Unicorn horn – not a uniceros horn, possibly from new species?
Sheena – traveling companion and apparent liar, mentioned Imperial Research Academy, assassin possibly after Colette's life – became a highly trusted friend. How?
Genis – lost younger brother
Abandoned by parents – why?
Claims to be an elf – for better treatment
Lloyd – student and traveling companion
Colette – student and traveling companion, someone wanted her dead? Why?
Mercenary – temporary traveling companion
Replica? – caught between Malkuth and Kimlasca? Yup definitely a replica Except… now she claimed she wasn't. What was the truth here?
Expected King Ingobert to know Sheena – Severe reaction, meant something significant
Asked about Martel (asked all of us) and Tetheallah (just asked me) – people? Places?
Terrified of His Majesty – if he knows her truth, he might kill her? Why believe that?
Asked about Class M
Wants to know what others think of her – fears they might hurt her. Why?
Mentioned Crusious - ?
Known thief – seriously, hide what you don't want stolen
Worried about not being in the Score
Betrayed by guardians (her parents?) – might explain her serious distrust. What happened with her parents?
Martel is a woman like Yulia. Everyone knows her? Who is she really? Though it made sense why Raine asked all of them about her. It meant that she was supposed to be common knowledge. Why just ask me about Tetheallah?
Told Natalia she was from a village in the sky with other elves. True? Birth place? Could it really be though?
As he stared at the paper in his hands, he realized he gave her as much reason to fear him as anyone else had. All of these things he tracked to figure out what her secret was had no greater benefit to her. She had quite a secret to hide and this paper was his effort to uncover it, even if it meant she feared her own death. He looked up at her, saw her wide, frightened eyes and the panic ingrained in her pale face, the way her jaw took up the shivering the rest of her body couldn't do. The way she gripped the door as her only means of standing upright even at the expense of blood flow to her fingers. The realization struck him.
Her fear was deeply rooted. Even as he stood there, she cowered at the sight of him, a strong woman who could survive anywhere on her own even having cared for her baby brother as such a young child, who cared so much about strangers that she'd come with them to Akzeriuth, even risking never seeing her brother again, and she cowered in a fear he had only ever seen in himself.
This wasn't right.
This isn't what he wanted.
Suddenly, the truth didn't matter anymore. He pocketed his list and sighed. "I'm sorry."
"D-do… do you understand now? Do you know why?"
Guy shook his head. "I can see you're terrified of us, and the more I try to find out the truth, the more scared you become. I just realized in the face of that… I really don't care what's going on." Surprised, she loosened her grip on the door. "I just don't want you to be afraid of me. That was my goal all along, not to be something you'd fear." He chuckled nervously. "No wonder why you don't trust me."
A visible wave of relief overtook her and the knot in his stomach loosened. Funny. He didn't realize he had one there.
"Thank you." Her breathing slowed, but he could still hear it come in short bursts. Even so, he noticed that her limbs still shook. He got too close to the truth and his heart tore at the thought of how that affected her. This wasn't what he wanted. He wanted her to feel safe. That was far more important than knowing her secret.
"Guy, I'm so sorry. I know you feel betrayed, but…" Raine swallowed. "I wanted her to stop asking questions. And…" He raised his hand as of to say don't worry about it, but she licked her dried lips and then continued, "that seemed the most logical thing to say."
Asking questions…. Of course. Yes, that's what he'd been doing all along, too. Ashamed he turned away and paced back and forth by the table between the two couches. She didn't outright say it was a lie or the truth, but it wouldn't matter either way. Natalia would believe whatever she was told. Anise had proven that. Maybe Guy got a different story because he wouldn't believe her about the land in the sky. However, it did make sense with Raine's clue about "the world over". The only other theory he could come up with just couldn't be true. It was impossible. Finally, he stopped and faced her. "Can you… find a way to tell me someday?" He asked. "When you can finally trust me?"
The tears streamed down her cheeks as she smiled. "Yes, definitely." He smiled, too.
"Good." Suddenly he felt awkward. He looked around at the lounge, how there were dart games, posters, and shelves of books and other games. Oh! He knew what to do. He walked over to the table and picked up a pack of cards to shuffle. Not that they weren't already well mixed. He had shuffled them thousands of times before now just to busy his hands with something while he fumed. "Wanna play? I checked the deck. There are two cards missing, a three of diamonds and a six of spades. I've searched all over this lounge and I can't find them. They were probably lost in the fall."
Raine nodded and moved to sit on the couch at the far side of the table, but he could see her fingers trembling as she sat down. "I suppose it's amazing there's only the two missing," she said in a low voice. She tried to laugh to ease her tension but it came out as more of a pitiful cough. She still didn't look him in the eye. Not like she had before.
I did that… Now he felt a sense of obligation to repair it.
There had to be something they could talk about that wouldn't be a problem…. He took a seat and shuffled for a minute before he thought of something. "So how about riding the Tartarus? Is it better than a ship?" He dealt five cards to each of them.
"Actually, yes. I look down and I can see the deck instead of the water." Guy imagined her leaning over the rail, something he was sure she hadn't ever done on a ferry. He knew where she'd been, too, just outside the bridge where below was nothing but the ship's deck. If she fell, she'd splat against it, but at least she wouldn't drown. He supposed that was comforting to her…?
"So, umm…" Raine began as she picked up her cards, "Luke is only seven years old?" What? She'd learned that a long time ago. She must really be fishing for a topic, too. At least it wasn't just him. She looked at her cards, but Guy could tell she wasn't really that interested. Was this a bad idea?
"Yeah, I suppose he is," he said. He reached for his own cards, but didn't look at them. The true weight of that never occurred to him before. Luke really was just a young child, and as Natalia said, Asch was the original Luke raised in the house of Fabre. Even he wasn't quite an adult yet, but Guy certainly didn't think either of them as that young.
"What was he like after the kidnapping?" Raine casually studied the cards in her hand. "When he was a newborn?"
Guy peeked at his own cards. Damn. He would've been better off with that missing six of spades. "He was… I guess he behaved exactly that, like an infant. He couldn't talk, he couldn't walk, and he had no idea what to do with a spoon so he kept wanting to eat with his fingers. He cried for the first week he was left in his room to sleep by himself." Somehow, Guy felt he had always known. Even Duke Fabre commented that Luke behaved like an infant, but it just couldn't be possible to degenerate a human being successfully. But they had replicated one. They knew it now. Though judging from Natalia's demeanor, especially around Asch, she was still in a bit of denial of what it all meant.
Maybe he could bluff his way without the six.
"What are we using for wagering?" Raine asked.
He looked up at her. "Did you want to wager?"
She shrugged and then smiled. "Why not? I found some stuff when I searched the Tartarus. I wouldn't mind losing some of it."
Guy laughed, finally breaking the tension between them. "I'll bet. I saw how swollen your bag had become." He peeked around the table at her bag on the floor. Yup, still a lot. "But saying that means you think you'll lose. A lot."
"You don't believe anything I say anyway." She set her cards down and retrieved her bag. She sifted through it, relieving it of things Guy guessed she wouldn't mind giving up.
He quit smiling and sighed. Apparently, it was true. After a couple of rounds, he understood her real reason for thinking she'd lose. She definitely wasn't an avid poker player and from the moment she knew she had good cards, Guy knew not to throw out any more items onto the table. Her eyes would light up with the delight he hoped to see more of. This is how he wanted to see her. It didn't matter whether he won or lost each round. She'd probably steal back whatever she'd lost anyway, but he did end up with a really cool-looking nut, a silk scarf, and a circlet he'd be better off selling to a vendor somewhere.
"Didn't you think something was wrong?" Raine asked after a while. Guy shrugged, barely remembering. "I mean, someone degenerating to infancy, it seems like something someone would notice."
"Well, yeah, of course we noticed." He left the "how could we not?" dangling as he studied his new round of cards. Ugh, these weren't any better. Should he bluff? He looked up at her to read her face. "You weren't there. They told us Malkuth did something to him that affected his memory. Why should we believe they'd replicated him?" She certainly didn't seem as excited about her cards. He decided to try. What didn't he mind getting rid of? "I'll throw in the silk scarf." And he dropped it back onto the table. Actually, it was a pretty scarf. He liked the idea of Raine wearing it.
She inhaled a deep, thoughtful breath. "I suppose many things seem clearer in hindsight." Still, it might seem odd to her, but to him, it was clearer in hindsight. Now that he thought about it, it should've been clear something more was going on after Guy had to reteach Luke literally everything. "But you said he had to relearn walking and talking…. And his hair was different but he had the same face."
That was true, but— "When you saw Duke Fabre for the first time, did you suspect anything weird?"
Raine frowned, sorting her cards in her hand again. Weren't they already in the order she wanted? Then she changed them again. What was she doing? After a beat, she said, "I was preoccupied."
"So was I." Guy insisted. "And that's why I never thought too deeply about it. I trusted what they told me, and even though what they said didn't make sense, I believed it. Why should I believe something else, especially something like that? And besides, it could've had something to do with the Score. How should I have known?"
"For how many years?" She lowered her hands to the table, cards still splayed in her fingers. She must not have much confidence in her cards. Guy felt good about his odds of winning. Maybe he should've put up the circlet and let her have the scarf when her hand was better.
"They always insisted he would remember. After a while, you just wholeheartedly believe he would. I had no knowledge of what kind of technology Malkuth had. I was just a little boy when I left."
"Oh, I don't believe that for a moment. You're more versed in technology than the rest of us, with the possible exception of Jade."
He supposed that was almost true. Jade knew how to use technology, but Guy wondered how much Jade could build or manipulate the mechanics. He was a colonel, not an engineer. "I am more versed in how technology works, but I didn't get steeped into it until I came to Kimlasca. And with a secret like that, how would I ever find out? It's not something the average citizen is privileged to know about."
"The average citizen…." Raine spread out the cards in her hand and studied them. "Yes, I suppose that's true. I fold this time. Let's try again."
Guy was so easy to manipulate. Raine smiled at her hand this time, knowing he would fold. This time she had nothing, but sure enough, he threw down his cards and let her take the pot. He didn't seem too sorry to lose the stuff, though, as he leaned back in his chair and folded his hands behind his head. He had finally backed off pushing her so hard about her origins, but she could tell it still gnawed at him. She wanted him to know the truth, but how could she tell him without knowing the consequences of letting her secret be known? There had to be something she could tell him. A part of her wanted to give him more clues to the truth, especially since the last one apparently went right over his head. Damn he was flighty. And no thanks to Natalia who gave him an alternate interpretation of her clue that should've tipped him off.
Raine gathered up her cards but didn't redeal them. It was obvious he was done playing and she kind of felt it, too. They sat in silence, looking at everything in the room except each other as this awkward blanket fell in the room. But there wasn't much back home in Sylvarant that Raine dared speak about. So many things were too dangerous to say. The Desians, the Journey of Regeneration, and definitely not the Exspheres, or the Renegades. She doubted he wanted to hear anything about Iselia, mostly because Engeve was far more interesting and it was just a farming town. All she could say was that it was a small village and she was a schoolteacher. Up until they had to travel—
Oh! What about that?
Raine sat up and leaned towards him. When he noticed her, she saw the remnant of a hope in his eyes. "You already know I've been studying the spirit seals. I'm curious about your take on them."
He blinked at her, almost incredulous. "The spirit seals?" He laughed. "Not much. But I have heard the Sephiroth were where people thought the spirits could be if they existed."
"Of course, where fonons gathered would be the most logical place." After all, those were the places even in Sylvarant where the most mana gathered, hence why Undine was near the falls and the ocean and Efreet was in the desert.
"Yeah, but people rarely talk about the spirits anymore," Guy said. "Least of all call the Sephiroth spirit seals. That's such an archaic term." That wasn't the first time her words had been considered archaic. Mana, for one thing. And she remembered the confused looks she got when she said she was under Jade's tutelage back at Baticul. She wondered what else she'd said that sounded odd to them. But that didn't matter right now. Raine simply enjoyed seeing him relax a little.
"But they're part of your—the calendar. Don't you think they should have more significance?"
He shrugged. "I suppose they could, but I doubt anyone's thought of them since before the Dawn Age. Legends about the spirits gave us the calendar and the reason lay forgotten. No one has seen them for thousands of years, if they ever have."
"What about saying the miasma seeps up from Gnome's domain?"
"That's just an expression to describe the earth," Guy said. "I hadn't heard that anyone actually believes Gnome lives there."
So that's how it is. But now Raine finally understood why no one seemed to think it was odd for her to study the spirit seals. They must've just thought of her as a specialized lunatic of the antiquated arts. She knew where Gnome would appear, though. The Sephiroth at the Zao Ruins was the source of Second Fonons. She even felt traces of earth mana there. If she wanted to meet Gnome, that would've been the best place to try. "What do you think of my... studying them?"
"It's actually interesting," he said, "just because I didn't think anyone cared. Why do you study them? Or… is that classified knowledge, too?" Then he blushed. "Er, I didn't mean it like that."
She chewed on her answer. Should she tell the truth? Guy had been very easy-going with her... Maybe part of the truth would be better. "I had an interaction with a spirit once."
"No way!"
She nodded. "It's true." Oh, his excitement thrilled her. Finally, the real Guy returned. The one unburdened by recent events. He settled into leaning towards her in an interest he hadn't used since he first arrived on the Tartarus. His interest delighted her.
"What did it look like? Which one was it?"
She couldn't help but open up and smile. "I met Undine, the Spirit of Water. She was... how do I put it?" Somehow "aquatic woman" wouldn't do her justice. Neither would using "fish" to describe her. "Imagine an aquatic blue fairy with fins like a seahorse. Her hair was fluid and long, and she wields a sword made of water."
"That's..." He seemed to lose his words as he spoke barely in a whisper. "That's incredible." After overcoming his surprise, he looked away as if unsure that she told him the truth. "Where did you meet her?"
"At the water spirit seal," Raine said dryly. That should've been obvious.
"Er, well, yeah, I suppose so, but..." Guy looked at her funny. "You said you'd traveled Radessia and very little elsewhere."
Now it was Raine's turn to look away. The spirit seal of water wasn't on Radessia. It made sense, though, considering the desert nature of the continent.
"Was that a lie?" Somehow, she suspected he already knew it was.
She smiled at him. "I suppose you'll have to decide what it means."
"You know, responses like that make me glad when I understand something you tell me." Something in his face told her, though. He wasn't sure what to believe and that frustrated him. "But meeting an aggregate sentience of the fourth fonon? I haven't heard of anyone actually meeting any of them."
"I thought I mentioned that Sheena had."
"Well… yeah, but… that source didn't sound too credible."
Of course not, Raine thought. Why would anyone take Sheena's lunacy seriously when she "mixed up" the names of the research facilities, among other things?
More confusing for Raine, why did the spirits underlie Auldrant's culture, and yet truly pervade only Sylvarant and Tethe'alla? Didn't anyone in Auldrant summon the spirits like Sheena did? For a world as prosperous as Auldrant, she found it strange. Then again, the Order of Lorelei was the dominant organization of this world and it was based off reading the planet's memory. Who would attempt to summon the spirits unless someone saw it in the Score that they should? Not to mention that the spirits probably became legend once the Order of Lorelei showed up.
"Just out of curiosity, why do you ask?"
Raine waited before giving an answer as she tried to decide what to say. "I wanted to know your opinion of what spirit seals are—"
"Opinion?"
"—so that I can ascertain the common knowledge definition of them."
He expression turned to puzzlement. "The common knowledge definition of spirit seals? Why would that elude you?"
She shrugged with a sly smile. "Another piece of the puzzle, Guy."
"Come on."
"I'm sorry." Her smile disappeared. "I know it's really unfair." Maybe there was more she could tell him, something that would help him understand. "Actually, there's something else I'd like to tell you if you promise that this, too, remains a secret, especially from Jade."
"Why are you still so afraid of him?" But then Guy shook his head. "You know what? I don't care about that. I promise he won't find out because of me."
She had more she wanted to tell him? Guy had to be gaining her trust, little by little, but why did this have to be so frustrating?! But now he must have hit the jackpot with her. Maybe this was what Natalia was talking about. Saying the right thing. But somehow, that didn't feel like the right answer for why Raine decided to open up more. It must be the guilt of how she'd been treating him.
"You told me about your parentage," Raine said, "so I want to tell you about mine." She laughed when Guy's face turned so sheer surprise. No. She wouldn't say anything about her parents, would she?
"You mean, you're willing to say?"
"I can tell you that much safely, yes." She leaned forward and rested her elbows on the table. "My father was a soldier. He met my mother when he was sent on a mission to the village in the woods. If they had kept the relationship platonic, I doubt things would've soured like they did, but since he fell in love with her, the—villagers didn't take too kindly to them." Something about her story rang true, though Guy couldn't place his finger on it. It somehow made sense with what she had told Natalia. If someone had come to the elven village but he was an outsider soldier—no, that was impossible. Elves don't exist. "They apparently allowed my parents to stay for a little while. Long enough to have me and long enough that I do remember the village. But then we were kicked out. After that, it seemed like all we did was travel like we were on the run."
"Do you know what happened?"
Raine shook her head. "We weren't well-liked, I knew that. I'd always been treated like an outsider and then the knights came looking for my father one day. I don't know specifically what happened, but I remember the village elder being adamant that we weren't welcome back. We traveled all over the place and eventually, Mother gave birth to Genis. He wasn't very old when Mother handed him to me, told me to wait at some rock pillars, and disappeared with Father. I haven't seen them since."
"So you've literally raised Genis his whole life. I thought you were exaggerating at least a little." Man, that must've been difficult. Guy knew what it was like raising Luke, but he at least had a support system. By the sounds of it, Raine had no one. Perhaps someone helped her along the way? Who would abandon two kids in need like that?
"But for a few months, yes."
No wonder she'd felt abandoned by her parents. They literally did, and from the sounds of it, her parents really did seem to love her. Why would they just drop them off like that? "There must be more to what happened."
Finally, Raine sat back in her chair and turned her attention to the target game. "It doesn't matter if there was. There's no point in worrying about them."
"Raine…." He didn't like that attitude about it at all. What if her parents had a really good reason for what they did? Guy couldn't fathom it, but he was still sure the reason was there. After all, her parents taught her so much about tolerance in the face of prejudice. She loved strangers and put her life on the line for them. If her parents never loved her, she wouldn't have such a strong support of life. She was also brilliant, and that knowledge, as she said, came from experience as much as books.
Wait, that wasn't right, it was her parents who taught her so much and why waste that much time and education on a kid they weren't planning to raise? No, Guy decided, her parents didn't abandon them without reason. Raine had mentioned that the people who protected her lied about their intentions… If she was talking about her parents, it would explain why she was so distrustful. If she couldn't trust her own parents to stay by her side, why should she trust anyone else to? Though she did trust Sheena enough to care for Genis in her absence.
And she trusted Guy enough to tell him all of this. One thing confused him, though. Where in the world were the rock pillars she mentioned? He would've thought that sounded like the Fubras River except, judging by her reaction when she saw them up close, they weren't quite right. They did look similar enough to be mistaken for the rock pillars, though, because he remembered her excitement at seeing them in the first place followed by the disappointed realization that she wasn't where she thought she was.
"Please, never mention any of this to anyone. No one knows about this at all."
He nodded when he realized it. She had shared a genuine secret with him, the kind like the one he told her. "Absolutely," he said as seriously as he could, "I won't tell anyone, not even Luke, and especially not Natalia." And he could tell from her face that she knew he would die without having told a soul.
"Why did she tell you?" Raine asked suddenly. "Did she say?"
"In her defense…" Guy sighed. "She thought you had already told me. We've spent so much time together, she genuinely thought I was the first to know." Raine nodded. "You are such a contradiction. Why do you care about people when you clearly can't trust anyone?"
Raine smiled broadly and nodded. "My parents. My father epitomized those values from the moment he met my mother. Actually, I don't mind telling you this, too, but I have a specific memory that I fall back on anytime I feel like I've lost my way. It's about a time my father proved that fighting wasn't always the answer."
"Really?" No, Guy had definitely hit the jackpot. For some reason, she didn't mind talking about her parents. He finally found a topic he could ask about.
Kloitz had been taught to kill because he joined the knights, doesn't mean he enjoyed it. Knighthood was a way of life, a way to earn money as someone who didn't know much else for a trade. That was the only way he knew to live, even though he saw wars and fighting as a waste, but he justified that with the same ideology his superiors preached: protect the townspeople from those who threatened them. With the absence of the Desians stretching for years now, he wondered who else they protected people from, other than monsters outside the cities, anyway. Still not everyone got along and he found himself telling adversaries "don't make me do this" before he was forced to stain his hands. So when he found out about the elves in Heimdall and how they lived, the way that Virginia lived, he felt drawn to them.
Their lives were far more peaceful. They only killed when they had to, even when it came to monsters. Virginia spared the life of a gold beetle and chose to run away from it when it stunned itself. Kloitz followed her and never stopped. Of course, that was years after she followed him out of her home village. Having just been banished, she still kept the same sweet, demure smile she always had. Their daughter had that same smile.
He tugged at his daughter's hand, but Raine stood firm. She pointed ahead of them to the right and Kloitz looked. A small pack of gray night raids stared at them from the forest, teeth bared and obviously hungry. Kloitz sighed. He didn't want any part of this. He drew his sword, grabbed the chimes from his pocket and approached the pack by only a few steps.
"You stay over there!" He hollered as he clanked the chimes. A few of the monsters darted back, but most stayed where they were. The leader's tongue lolled from his mouth. "We're not anywhere near civilization," he noted. Raine only discovered later what he'd meant. If they had been close to a human village, the night raids would've known to run away.
Virginia hummed from behind him. She held Raine to her leg, protecting the child's shoulder with her arm. "They don't seem to know humans as a threat."
Kloitz directed Virginia and Raine back, pointing and moving his arm as he gave instructions. "Loop around to that end of the forest. We'll see if we can avoid them."
But as soon as Virginia took her first step, the leader of the pack darted. Kloitz dropped the chimes and picked up a rock instead, hollering louder than before. Startled by the rock, the leader stopped, watching them. So Kloitz threw it, his aim perfect. The leader yelped and turned back to its group. It stayed half-way, resuming its watch. Kloitz picked up the chimes. "That's a good boy. You just stay over there." He kept his sword pointed at the leader as they circled around, taking the long way towards the forest. Kloitz and the leader locked eye contact the whole way until finally, a tree trunk intervened. He finally put his sword away after it was clear the night raids weren't following them.
The three of them carried on in silence. Even Raine knew better than to talk too much. Someone had been trailing them for a few weeks now and who knew how close they were. Along the way, Virginia would pick wild berries, gather herbs and greens, and overall find edible stuff that Kloitz didn't have the experience to find on his own. He loved watching her. She'd brush a thyme leaf across Raine's nose, causing her giggle. Even the way Raine wrinkled her nose was just like her mother. Thank goodness she didn't get much from him!
After a while, a strange beast crossed their path, swinging its snake tail as it walked with massive brown paws. The head was that of a goat and it folded its feathered white wings against striped orange body. Scared, Raine hid behind her father's leg. Kloitz patted her on the head.
"It's not harmful unless you force it to be." He told her. The beast stopped and watched them, its goat-eyes trained one each one of them in turn, sniffing the air.
"How do you know it won't hurt us?" Raine whispered, too terrified to speak any louder.
"We're no threat to it." Kloitz watched the beast and took his daughter's hand. "Don't show your teeth. Walk along this way with me. Don't show your back. He won't bother us." The three of them side-stepped until the beast turned sharply south, where they came from.
As if calling him a liar, the beast lowered its head and growled in a rattled bleat, the strangest sound Raine had heard all her life. When it bared its teeth, she saw they weren't completely flat like a regular goat's teeth, but more exaggerated and sharpened human teeth. It was likely an omnivore. It pounced towards them and then beyond them, chasing whatever it didn't like in the forest from which they had come.
Kloitz watched it go.
"How come we didn't fight it, Daddy?" Her voice still wavered with ragged breaths.
"We had no reason to," he replied simply. "If we killed everything we saw just because, we wouldn't last long." Even so, he pulled his hand from the hilt of his sword. The reflexes he'd gained a knight also kept them alive. But now wasn't the time for a lesson like that. Raine was too young. Far too young.
"But it could've hurt us." She buried her face in his pantleg.
"No, if it was hungry, it wouldn't have bothered studying us. It would've just attacked." He ruffled her hair. "Now come on, don't be like that."
She sniffed. "Then why did it run away like that?"
"It smelled blood. Something got injured. Whatever got into a fight with those night raids back there just drew that beast's attention. So you see, Raine, it's not always the best idea to fight. We would've drawn its attention to us instead."
"But how did you know it wouldn't pounce on us?" She cried.
Virginia knelt and cuddled Raine to her chest. "Because, my love, its body language told us everything. You must pay attention to what the monsters are telling you. That's the only way to know how you should respond; if they don't see you a threat, don't do something that will change their minds."
Kloitz knelt down with both of them. "Only kill if you have to. Always remember that. You can kill for food and you can defend yourself, but never kill unless your life is at stake." He opened his arms wide. "Now come here, Baby Girl." She swapped to hug her daddy's chest. "Do you hear that?"
She listened. He knew she heard the fighting, humans screaming, and her eyes widened. "Is that the ones following us?"
"Probably. And now at least some of them will lose their lives because they chose to kill. That animal was drawn to their bloodshed."
Guy pulled his blankets up to his chin and rolled to his side. It shouldn't be long now before they arrived in Belkend, but a part of him hoped they never got there. He'd spent the day with Raine, idly walking, sharing what they could remember of their parents. If even Raine's backstory didn't make much sense, he smiled about understanding her personality better and why she bothered joining them to Akzeriuth even with as badly as she wanted to find Genis. Just like how Luke as so abrasive on the surface, but underneath, she was definitely too kind-hearted to leave wounded people to their fate. Now he knew why.
Still, he'd failed to convince her that her parents had a very good reason for leaving their kids behind. When she got tired of the arguments, she had excused herself to bed, but something about it felt different. She wasn't upset with him. Even in her skeptic smile, he saw the hope in her that maybe he could be right.
A/N: Hi, Everyone!
Yes, that chapter was a BEAST (no pun intended, or maybe it was?). I wanted to trim it down and split it into two, but I couldn't figure out how to do it without breaking the rhythm and flow. So... you ended up with over 11,300 words' worth of text! You're welcome! :)
Now to answer a question I raised whenever that was... Chapter 40 became SO much better because of esonic1's wanting to see Asch and Luke fight. I would've skipped straight to the Tartarus on the way to Belkend and the original plan included Guy getting a little upset with Raine for not talking. But I had to have more in Yulia City as a direct result of showing the fight, so I started brainstorming more that could happen there. I mined a previous chapter and realized this would be a perfect opportunity for Natalia to ask about Martel (I had actually planned that a little later), and cause Guy much more trouble than just a mere upset for not getting answers. I mean, what better way to inflame and hurt than by his finding out she told someone else her secret that she refused to tell him?
Plus, as AngelAdept pointed out, Guy should've picked up on Raine's hint and Natalia allowed me to cover those tracks in a much more believable way (before it was something like his getting too hung up on what the hell Raine keeps trying to say and getting mad about hearing nothing useful). )c Yes, you, my dear readers, are making this story so much better than it was. I can't express how much I appreciate all the comments that help make these epiphanies happen. So thank you!
I'm planning the next chapter to be ready in three weeks, so January 7th. Then comes 42, which is one of my most-read and absolute favorite chapters (second only to what is currently Chapter 45) of all time, so look forward to it! We are also really close to the point when Luke's diary has more and more changes, so when we get there, I'll flag for you whether you want to read the diary for the changes or if you just want to refresh your memory on what he wrote. There will be a TON of stuff I skip over mostly because it's not necessary to show you that again when Luke's summary is sufficient.
Oh, and finally, I am disappointed with how few chapters you all got in 2023, so I have made a plan for 2024 that things will move much faster. I'm not getting hung up on catios or projects because I want to finish this thing in a decent time-frame. I've already spent years on this thing. It's about time that I really focus on finishing it. So by the end of 2024, I want to have posted at least through Chapter 55, maybe more if I can, but there are couple of gaps that I'll have to work on. So yeah, that's my plan.
Anyway, I hope you all have amazing holidays, if you celebrate them, and if you don't insert "week" instead of "holiday". :) See you soon!
~~Kat =^-^=
