While Edward walked home from Dolly's empty-handed, he gave himself a mental pep talk. Maybe this was for the best. He had been drinking a lot lately, and a night off would do him some good. He had almost convinced himself he was fine by the time he tried to unlock his front door. His hands shook so hard that he dropped his keys twice before getting the door open.
Once inside, he decided his best course of action was to make some dinner, take a hot shower, and try to get some sleep. He was exhausted from all the physical and mental exertion of the day. He limped into the kitchen and pulled a frozen dinner from the freezer and tossed it into the oven. Once the temperature was set, he took a hot shower and settled into his chair.
He had just started to doze off when the oven timer went off. He stood up, and the room began to spin. He broke out in a cold sweat, and a wave of nausea washed over him. He sat back down on the edge of the recliner and put his head between his knees until he felt the room stop tilting to the left. He got to his feet again, slower this time. He felt clammy and nauseous. He took several deep breaths on his way to the kitchen to get his dinner from the oven.
After he ate, Edward decided to go to bed. He might even start that novel sitting on his nightstand since he moved in. At nine, he was in bed trying to read, but the words kept blurring together, and his hands shook so hard he couldn't keep the book still. He turned out the light and tried to sleep.
"You're late!" Jimmy shouted over the sound of the grill's overhead vent. His hands were on his hips, looking annoyed while burgers sizzled and the fry alarm beeped.
"Nope, I'm not on 'til four." Bella smarted back as she grabbed her apron and order book from the small table under the time clock. She punched her time card and waved it in the air, "It's three fifty-seven."
"Well, we're busy," Jimmy said. He couldn't help but smile. He acted like a tough boss, but he was a softy, especially where Bella was concerned.
"Well, I am here now. What needs to go out?" She grabbed a few napkins and went to the pass window to pick up orders.
"Burgers are for table two. Loaded fries are for the bar, and check on Bev when you get out there. She seemed upset when she came in today."
"You got it, Jimmy." Bella playfully elbowed him in the side. She loved Jimmy. He was family. He had looked out for her since she had moved to Forks.
Bella pushed through the saloon doors that separated the kitchen from the bar and grabbed the food in the window pass. Beverly did look upset. She thought as she dropped off the fries on her way to deliver the burgers.
Beverly was Bella's best friend. She trained Bella when she started at Thelma's. First, how to pour a beer that wasn't full of foam and then how to carry eight pints at once without spilling them. Bella didn't like talking about her past, and she didn't have any excitement in her life now, so she was a willing ear for Beverly.
Beverly's life was nothing but drama. She had two small boys, six and four, and they were a handful. Beverly had no help from either of their fathers, financially or otherwise. One was in prison, and the other, well, no one knew what happened to Rich. He found out Beverly was pregnant and, in a completely cliche way, went out for smokes and never came back. She was raising them on her own with financial help from her… well, Bella didn't know what to call him.
John Winfield was a wealthy married banker in town. Beverly was his open secret. Everyone, including John's wife, knew they were sleeping together and he was helping support her, but no one talked about it. He was cruel and treated Beverly like garbage. Bella suspected he was physically abusive, too, but Beverly would never say.
Bella returned to the bar to grab refills for the two men watching the ball game. As she filled the glasses, she caught Beverly's eyes. They were puffy and red-rimmed, and she had dark circles like she hadn't slept all night.
Beverly reached for her purse under the bar as she asked Bella, "Can you handle things? I have to run out for a bit. I will be back in time for the dinner rush, though."
"You bet, Bev. No problem. Be careful." Worry knotted in Bella's stomach.
"I will be back before six." Beverly looked hard into Bella's eyes.
"Sounds good." Bella tried to sound cheerful and calm. She felt anything but. It sounded to Bella that if Beverly wasn't back on time, something had gone wrong.
Bella continued to worry. Her eyes darted from the clock to the door, and back so many times she was giving herself whiplash. Finally, at 6:15, panic took over, and she headed back into the kitchen to use the phone.
"Who are you calling?" Jimmy asked.
"The police!" Bella bit at him.
Jimmy walked over and took the receiver out of her hand. "She will be back. Calm down. I'm sure one of those kids needed something, and she lost track of time." Jimmy tried to be reassuring.
"She never said she was going home, Jimmy. Bev said she would be back at six. She had to take care of something. She could be anywhere, and I have a feeling John is involved."
"Don't call the cops. The last thing she needs is child welfare poking around. Call her house." Bella rolled her eyes, but Jimmy had a point about child welfare. "Humor me, Bells. Call her house first." He handed the receiver back to her. She hung up the phone and picked it up again to dial Beverly's home number.
It rang twice when Bella heard a voice call from the bar. "Hey, doesn't anybody work here?" It was Beverly's light-hearted tone that caught Bella so off guard. She slammed the phone down and thundered through the swinging doors.
"Where the fuck have you been?" Bella growled through gritted teeth. "I was about to call the cops. What happened to 'I'll be back at six'?"
"Bella, I am sorry. I lost track of time. I never meant for you to worry. I needed to deal with some things."
Bella grabbed a towel and took her frustrations out by wiping down the bar and refilling the snack bowls. Bella turned to face Beverly, her fist firmly on her hip.
"You know, Bev, I don't get what's so great about John. He is mean and manipulative. You are better than him." Beverly started to interrupt. Bella raised her hand in a stop motion and continued. "You know you and the boys can move in with me anytime. You don't need John to support you, and you sure don't need to take any more of his shit." Bella slapped the bar with the towel in her hand.
Beverly stepped around Bella to grab a glass from under the bar. "Bella, I love you, but I need you to butt out of this, okay. There are just some things you don't understand." Beverly retorted as she filled a pint glass from the beer tap. Out of the corner of her eye, Bella saw Beverly wipe at a tear rolling down her red cheek.
Bella took a deep breath and blew out slowly. She had overreacted. She was acting no better than John. "I am sorry, Bev. I was so worried when you didn't come back on time, and you were so upset when you left. I went a little over the top." Bella looked at Beverly. "I hate how he hurts you." Bella gave Beverly's shoulder a light squeeze. "I will go take table one's order unless you want the tables tonight?"
"Go ahead. I'll mind the bar," Beverly said. She gave Bella a small smile.
Bella came around the bar and headed for the booths. She turned around and leaned back over the bar. "I want to know what happened earlier with the asshole— I mean John. We can talk when things settle down, okay?" Bella said.
Beverly shook her head yes. "I love you, girl, you know that. Now go get those hungry boys' orders before they come after you!" She giggled.
Things did finally slow down around ten-thirty. People coming in now just wanted a beer and to watch the end of the game. Bella finished sweeping and wiping tables down and met Beverly behind the bar. She was leaning forward on her elbows, counting tips. "So, what happened tonight?" Bella asked as she jumped up to sit on the bar.
"Well, you know those kids of mine grow like weeds, and all of their winter clothes from last year, coats included, are too small and too short, so I told John I needed a little extra money this month."
"You know I can-"
"I know you can, but, anyway, he told me he couldn't get away tonight. He had promised the wife things were over between us and that she would be suspicious if he took off on a Saturday evening without her."
"When did he promise her that?" Bella asked.
"Three days ago." Beverly sighed. "I told him if she hasn't left by now, she's not going to. She likes the money and that big mansion she gets to live in."
"What did he do this afternoon that upset you, Bev?" Bella didn't think the fact that he couldn't get her the money that night would make her leave work crying.
"He told me I was a worthless mother. He had half a mind to call child services on me and get my boys taken away, that a good mother could provide for the children she brought into this world, but given the circumstances, he should be glad I managed to feed them regularly. He told me that he owed me nothing and that I should be grateful for what I get."
"That manipulating fucking bastard!" Bella yelled, causing several patrons to turn their heads toward her. "Sorry, fellas." She said in an apologetic tone. Once the attention was back on the game, she turned back to Beverly. "Hey, listen to me, your best friend. You are an amazing mother. Those boys are polite. They are always fed and always clean. They go to school every day, and their needs are always met. You work hard and take care of them. You don't need those boys' fathers, and you don't need John either."
Beverly sniffled loudly. "Thanks, Bells. I do my best. If I could do things over, I would make better decisions, but I love my kids."
"I know you do. No one can ever question your love for those boys." Bella tucked a small strand of hair behind Beverly's ear. "John, however,"
"Bella, don't start." There was a warning in Beverly's voice.
"I just wish you could see your worth, Bev, that's all. So, do you still need money for clothes and shoes?" Bella asked. "I am off Monday. We could go then. Get them the things they need?"
Bella made enough at the bar to pay her bills, but thanks to Jimmy's kindness, she owned her house and had some money in the bank to fall back on. Thelma had left everything, including the bar, to Jimmy in her will. After Thelma passed, he tried to get Bella to move out of the garage apartment and into Thelma's house. It would be hers outright, but it was too painful, too many memories, so Jimmy sold the house. He split everything, including life insurance, with Bella. She was family, and he knew that was what Thelma would have wanted. No one but Jimmy knew about this arrangement, and she wanted to keep it that way. When people asked, she told everyone an old wealthy great-uncle had died, and she was his favorite niece. People believed the story.
"He gave me some money," Beverly replied. "We met and talked things out."
"Talked things out?" Bella knew there was more to the story. Before she could question Beverly further about what talking really meant, the door to Thelma's opened, and a limping stranger sat down at the bar.
Sometime after eleven, Edward gave up on sleep. Covered in sweat and tangled in his sheets, he fought to get out of bed. He turned on the lamp and smoked a cigarette. The last of the pack, of course. He knew he would not make it the rest of the night without nicotine and alcohol, so he pulled on a pair of jeans and grabbed his jacket. There had to be a cigarette machine somewhere in this town.
He quietly left his apartment and walked out into the misty, cool night. Standing in front of his building, he had a decision to make. Right or left. He headed left into town and walked until he saw the bright neon sign. Thelma's Bar. He stood outside for a moment, counting the change in his pocket. He had enough for a pack, maybe two. He also remembered he had two dollars in his wallet. He could get a cheap beer. Hoping to find some relief, he pulled open the door and sat down on the closest stool to the door.
The girls behind the bar looked up at him like he interrupted their conversation.
"Hi, welcome in. What can I get ya?" the blonde girl asked.
Edward laid his change and two dollars on the counter. A pack of smokes and a beer. Cheapest you got." Beverly took his change and grabbed a pack of cigarettes from the overhead rack above the bar. She tossed them down while Bella filled a frosty mug.
"Need some matches?" The brunette asked.
"Yes, please."
Bella brought his beer and matches to him. "If you need anything else, just holler. I'm Bella. This is Beverly." Bella motioned over her shoulder.
"Edward. Thanks, I will." He said, glancing up at her and then back to his beer.
The night wore on. Bella was ready to go home. She had hoped to convince Jimmy that maybe they should close up early. Beverly had gone home around midnight, but Edward was still at the bar.
"Can I get you anything else? The grill is about to close if you are hungry?"
"How much is a burger?" Edward asked. Bella noticed a flush across his cheeks.
"Dollar fifty, but it comes with fries and all the fixins'. Jimmy makes a mean burger." She flashed a smile.
Edward pulled out his wallet and counted the change he had left. "No thanks. Can I get another pack of cigarettes?" There was something in his eyes that made Bella's heart ache. She had a feeling the change he held in his hands was all he had to his name.
"Sure. One pack of smokes coming up." She tossed them on the bar and walked back to the kitchen. "I don't want to hear it, Jimmy. I need a double burger, extra cheese, and fries, please."
"I just sat down, Bells."
"A customer would like a double cheeseburger, Jimmy. The customers that pay our bills, Jimmy." Bella's voice dripped with a fake sweetness.
Jimmy stood up with a huff from the small stool he was sitting on. "Thanks!" Bella blew him an exaggerated air kiss. "I promise the last food order of the night." Bella came back through the saloon doors to see Edward still sitting at the bar smoking. She was afraid he might leave. He looked like he needed five cheeseburgers. He was so thin. He looked like he could use a good night's sleep, too.
Bella grabbed another mug from under the bar, filled it, and passed it to Edward. Before he could protest "on the house." She said as she winked at him.
A few minutes later, she heard Jimmy call, "Order up!" She grabbed the hot burger basket from the window. She walked back over to where Edward was sitting. "So Jimmy, our cook, made an extra burger. He got his tickets mixed up." Bella rolled her eyes and chuckled. She hoped Edward would buy the story. "It will end up in the trash if you don't want it." She sat the basket down in front of Edward. He stared at it wide-eyed.
"I mean, I-I, are you sure it will go to waste? I can't pay for it." He muttered, embarrassed.
"Absolutely. Eat it while it's hot! Jimmy does this kind of thing all the time, but he's the boss, so what are you gonna do?" Bella laughed while she wiped down the bar.
She continued to clean and finish her closing duties while Edward ate every bite of the burger and fries.
"Bella!" Jimmy yelled from the kitchen. "I'm calling it. Let's go home!"
"Ok, Jimmy!" Bella yelled back. Turning back to Edward. "We're closing up. Anything else you need?"
"No, thank you, Bella. I appreciate everything tonight." Edward got down off the bar stool slowly. He had sat too long, and his hip was stiff. He shuffled to the door and let himself out.
"Bells, I am missing a ticket from the last order."
"Shit, I forgot to make one here." Bella handed Jimmy cash out of her apron.
"Thanks, Bells. Get out of here. It's been a long night. I have end-of-week books to do. You don't need to wait for me. See you tomorrow."
Bella grabbed her purse and jacket and locked the door behind her. She got in her car. She could not stop thinking about Edward. He pulled at her heartstrings in a way no one had in a very long time.
She pulled out onto the street and headed toward home when she thought she saw him walking. She drove past the man walking and then slowed down to look in her rearview mirror. It had to be him. He had a very distinct limp. She pulled over and rolled her passenger window down, waiting for him to walk by.
"Hey, Edward! It's Bella from the bar!" She called to him as he walked by. "Get in. I'll take you home."
Edward stopped, unsure of what to do. He would love a ride home, but he hated to look helpless and weak in front of this girl.
"No thanks. I'm good. I like the night air." He responded from the sidewalk. He willed her to take him at his word and drive off.
"It is cold and wet out there. Come on. I am harmless." She smiled, touching her hand to her pretend pearls.
"Really, I'm good.''
"Suit yourself." Bella put the car in drive and crawled beside him as he walked. He tried to ignore her, but she decided to make loud, small talk out the window. "Tonight was busy at the bar. Saturday nights are good for business." When he didn't respond, she continued, "Was that your first time in? I am good with faces, and I would remember you. Are you new to town?" He stopped walking, and she hit the brakes. She stared at the side of his face as he looked forward. She leaned over and opened the door. "Will you please just get in?"
"Alright, thanks." He smiled for the first time since Bella had met him.
"Where to Edward?" She asked as she pulled away from the curb.
