Summary:
Zim comes to visit Dib and Dib is concerned his SpaceBug is not in the best shape . What are the Tallests doing ? ? ?
Notes:
HAIIIII ^_^ Thank you so much for coming back to read another update ! ! We're approaching the climax of the story ! ! Hold onto your hats because the storm is about to blow in :-} ! ! This chapter is told from Dib's perspective and the title comes from the song The Cure by Lady GaGa ! ! It's about how much Dib wants to take care of his little volatile boyfriend XP XD ! ! Without further ado , please enjoy this chapter and any comments would be so so so amazing ! !
I'm Gonna Heal You Anyway
I feel consciousness spilling back into me. My eyes are still closed as I realize that my right shoulder is uncomfortably arched up and I'm leaned over the arm of the couch, my glasses mashing into the side of my face. There's also something small and warm leaning up against my left side and I hear the portable viewer still playing cartoons across from the couch. I finally peel my eyes open even though it burns, probably from lack of sleep, and glance down. It's GIR nuzzled up against me and he's asleep just like I was. I'm preparing to try and slowly move him away so I can get up and stretch when I hear the front door being unlocked and the door slides open. I carefully straighten up just a little to look over and see Zim enter the room as the door shuts behind him.
Minimoose, who was over by the little crystal table, floats by him and says something to which Zim doesn't reply but when he flicks his gaze up at him I think I notice something strange.
"Are you doing okay, human?" He asks, but he sounds a little out of breath. He looks my way when he asks this, and that confirms that there's this odd look in his eyes that causes anxiety to start winding in my stomach.
"I… I'm fine…" I reply, furrowing my eyebrows. I see him glance down at GIR and I do the same, carefully scooping him up and laying him down on the other end of the couch so I can get up without waking him.
"You wanted Zim to be your company, correct? I'm here." He says, moving to sit at the table. I sit down across from him wondering why his eyes look paler than usual. They aren't that normal deep, shining red. It's like they're less saturated and sporting tiny gray flecks in certain places. What the heck did they do to him? It's only been about one earth day. I need to know the specifics of this procedure. I wonder if he's still feeling confident about this whole thing based on the state he appears to be in.
"How did it go with the Tallests?" I inquire and he shrugs.
"It's fine. I'm on a snack break." He says, coughing a few times right after.
"Oh, are you hungry?" I ask.
"No, but the Tallests said I need certain foods to keep my energy up. It's a taxing process." He replies and I want to ask more about it but first, I get up and go to the storage unit retrieving a few things and coming back to the table.
"Here." I say, spreading out the food options. His antennas perk up at the bags of those Zentian chips, two cans of Zentian nectar, and a box of those acaer cookies he loves so much. "So can you tell me a little bit more about what they're doing?" I ask after just watching him tear into the cookies for a few moments.
"Right now it's just PAK analysis. The reason it requires so much energy is because it isn't standard. It's an advanced analysis. Drains my energy bank." He says after upturning the entire yellow box and finishing the cookies off.
"I guess I could see why an advanced analysis would be better for making whatever it is they're going for, but is that… that doesn't sound very safe." I point out, not really sure if he's listening as he eagerly cracks open one of the drinks.
"It isn't. You'd have to be a very amazing, skilled, and incredible Irken to go through it." He says, his haughty and hyper tone threading back into his words. I roll my eyes at what I should consider an annoying response but I'm secretly a bit relieved that he's acting more like himself. "But it isn't anything to be concerned about. The Tallests know what they're doing. If my levels get too low, they send me for snacks." He pauses eating to cough some more and I'm starting to get that ominous feeling again.
"How come they don't have any for you on the Massive?" I ask.
"They do." He says, finishing one of the cans and opening the other.
"Then… How come you're here eating this stuff? I thought you said they have the best stuff."
"They do." He repeats.
"Aw, you turned down the best snacks for me?" I tease and he scoffs.
"After that annoying fit you threw about me not being here, sure." He replies and his glare, although still pretty pale, doesn't have any more gray dots in it. "And it wasn't easy. Tak is here." He continues, saying her name with extra disdain.
"Wait, Tak?! Why?! How?!" I sputter. Tak is on Irk? How long has she been here? What has she been doing? After we stopped her diabolical plan to drain earth of its core and fill it with snacks like some kind of overdone gift basket for Red and Purple, Zim said she likely perished in space. And I know for a fact I still have her ship. I've had it all this time. Even used it to go find dad when Zim put him in space prison. How did she survive floating through space?
"I have no idea. And I don't care. But she somehow managed to gain the title of second in command to the Tallests so they have her following me around like some helpless smeet. It was almost impossible to get here without her knowing."
"Are you sure she doesn't know?" I ask, swallowing nervously and glancing around the room.
"You think I'd lead her here? To y- to… the OGI Bunker?!" He snaps.
"I'm just making sure." I say, holding my hands up. He just shakes his head and peels open a bag of chips. "So how much longer is your break and what do you want to do?"
"I don't know. What have you been doing all day?" He asks after finishing off the last of the snacks I brought over and I groan just thinking about how my day went.
"Where do I even start? GIR went into a screaming fit because Minimoose kept changing the show he wanted to watch, so I finally calmed him down by letting him use mine. I thought I could occupy myself with my real time NASA provided moon surveillance kit, since I haven't been able to observe it in a while, but then GIR started asking to order tacos! And he didn't understand why we wouldn't be able to do that so I had to convince him that pizza is better than tacos and make him THREE of my own frozen pizzas!" I exclaim, and Zim is clearly amused by my rant. "He ate all three in less than five minutes, then accidentally ate one of his hands which he choked on and then threw up along with ALL THE PIZZA!" I continue and he starts laughing which, now that I think of it, it does sound funnier since it's in the past.
"Where's his hand, then?" He asks in between the laughter.
"Oh don't worry, after I cleaned all of that up, and cleaned him up, I reattached it."
"And then he fell asleep?" He asks.
"Ha! You thought I was done!? Nope. That wasn't even the worst of it."
"Then what was?" He asks, squinting but the same sharp smile is present.
"The fact that he used my computer while I was showering! When I came back, first he insisted on doing my hair and the whole time he had this horrible Baby Shark song playing! The. Whole. Time. And when he finished with my hair, he DEMANDED I learn the dance with him! We must have done it a hundred times before Minimoose turned one of the portable viewers to that Poopsy Floopsy show, which GIR INSISTED I sit and watch with him!" I explain, and we're both laughing for a few moments as I realize it actually was hilarious.
"Yeah he's got a thing for those kinds of earth songs, it started with that horrible If You're Happy and You Know it. It drove me up the wall for months."
"I am not used to hearing so many of these nursery rhymes." I say thoughtfully and he grins.
"Well if I'm not here at all times to make you miserable, at least someone is." He says.
"Tuh. Don't worry, there's always someone doing that whether it's you, GIR, Gaz, or my dad." I reply and he hums, looking pretty pleased. "But really… I guess I wasn't actually miserable. It was okay. A little stressful since this is the longest I've ever been alone with him, but it was alright." I say and Zims expression goes from gratified to stunned. His antennas shoot up and his eyes are wide which I'm happy to see they're back to their normal sparkle. He stares at me like that for a second, then glances between me and GIRs sleeping form across the room.
"I didn't even…" he says seemingly more to himself than to me and I'm a little nervous that he might be reconsidering trusting me to be here with GIR while he's gone.
"He's okay, though. I can wake him up if you want-" I offer.
"No." He replies quickly. "I… I know he's okay." He says looking between us quietly again and I clear my throat.
"So, we can play a game for the rest of your break if you want." I suggest but he looks skeptical.
"Haven't you played enough games with GIR?" He asks.
"Yes. So now I'm playing one with you. Ever played Fortunately - Unfortunately before?"
"No." He says blandly. "How many more games are you going to be telling me about?"
"All of them. We've pretty much exhausted would you rather, you refuse to play never have I ever with me, for reasons that concern me, so this is a new one I found."
"Explain it." He says.
"Okay. It's super easy. It's an improv game. So we basically just make up a story by taking turns making up lines."
"That makes no sense." He rolls his eyes.
"I'm just bad at explaining it. So like if I say fortunately I have glasses to help me see, you say something unfortunate about it."
"Like… Unfortunately GIR dropped them into a toilet once and I never told you?" He replies and I start laughing but he looks confused.
"That… that was a joke, right?" I ask and he shrugs. "Okay… The idea is to use your imagination. Make something up. You can say anything you want. Like… Fortunately I just bought a new car."
"This is pretend?"
"Yes."
"Unfortunately I crashed it last night." He says seriously with a nod. "Good?"
"Yes." I reply, trying not to laugh too much so he doesn't think I'm laughing at him. "Fortunately, I found it and it wasn't totaled."
"Unfortunately you found it at the bottom of a lake."
"Fortunately my dad invented something to pull it from the lake for me."
"Unfortunately he's in the trunk of the car."
"You're morbid as fuck." I scold, sending him into a fit of giggles. "Alright, fortunately I get him out in time and he helps me fix the car."
"Unfortunately it gets taken away because I put stolen plates on it." He replies and it seems like he's pretty much got a handle on it now. We play for a few more minutes and his responses only get increasingly macabre. Other than that, he's a good player. After the laughter calms down and it gets a little silent, we're both just sitting in our respective thinking spaces until he speaks again. "I have to go back to the Massive now."
"Right…" I reply and as much as I want to express my growing concern for whatever they're doing to him, I feel like if I don't have any evidence it'll go unheard. It'll probably make him angry, if I'm being honest, because I know he still feels nothing but loyalty and admiration for his leaders. I would need something to make a way more compelling argument than just saying that I've got a bad feeling. I don't understand it. Humans have intuitions, why don't Irkens?
"Well first I'll have to go back to the ship." He says and I arch an eyebrow.
"Our ship?" I ask and he just looks at me for a few seconds.
"Our ship." He nods.
"What for?"
"I told the Tallests I'd eat snacks I brought with me from earth. They made Tak escort me but I didn't let her board. She's likely still waiting outside and if I take much longer she'll become curious about what's keeping me."
"Oh… Alright." I reply, watching him carefully as he gets up from the table. He walks over to the couch where GIR is still lightly snoring, pausing for a moment and then heading for the door. I open the storage unit again and retrieve another can of soda. "Hey. Drink this on your way back."
"Thanks, loyal-human." He smirks, placing the can into his PAK and then disappearing through the door. I stand there and wait until I hear the code typed in and the door lock again, then I hold up my communicator entering in the newest number I've added and placing an audio only call.
"Hi Dib! How's it going?" He answers cheerily. It always seems like he's in a permanently good mood.
"Hey Skoodge. It's alright but… Are you busy? Because I um…" I start but I don't know how to verbalize my concerns. I probably would sound like a complete idiot because this is very likely just a typical occurrence on Irk. And Zim has managed all these years without thinking twice, even for a second, about anything the Tallests tell him to do. But maybe I wouldn't sound silly to Skoodge. He's the leader of the OGI for goodness sake, he'd understand my suspicions, right? And just from our recent conversations and the first time we hung out (yesterday after Zim left) I can tell he wouldn't laugh at me either.
"No, you've caught me at a good time, actually. I just finished doing rounds and scoping out the perimeter. I'll be there in a few minutes." He replies. We hang up and I head to my room for my disguise. For whatever reason, Zim doesn't want me around other Irkens without my disguise which is fine by me. He was pretty adamant about how hideous humans are when he first came to earth, and I don't want to hear that again. Once everything is in place and I'm just pacing the living room floor, I hear the code being typed in on the other side of the door and then Skoodge comes in. I'm always fascinated by how short he is. He reminds me of Zim when we first met because he's no more than three and a feet tall. The other difference is that Skoodge has a more husky build and of course no PAK. And while Zim is typically scowling, Skoodge is almost always smiling. "Hiya!" He waves as the door shuts behind him. "How are things going with Zim?"
"How'd you know I saw him?" I ask.
"Any time the main entrance is disabled I get a notification so I saw him on surveillance."
"Oh. Wait, is that dangerous? I'm sorry, he only did it because I asked him to-"
"Dib relax, it's fine." He replies and we both look over to the couch when GIR turns towards the back in his sleep. "Are we disturbing him?" Skoodge laughs quietly.
"After what he's put me through, I can barely decide if I should let him sleep. But we can talk in my room." I reply and he follows me. There's still a few blankets spread over my floor from the makeshift picnic I had with GIR earlier so I cross the room and raise the three blinds, then sit down on the blankets and Skoodge sits down beside me. "How did your rounds go?"
"Oh fine, fine. I just had to stop by the PAK infirmary afterwards and take inventory. We definitely need more supplies but I haven't figured out how to get them yet. For now I just have to caution everyone and encourage them to try and be more careful."
"As quiet as everyone is, it doesn't really seem like there's much going on to the point that they'd even need to go to the infirmary that often."
"Yes, well a small percentage of our patients are injured. The rest, the majority of our resources go to Irkens whose PAKs breakdown on their own."
"They just break? I thought they were… I don't know. Made to last pretty much forever." I inquire and he just stares at me for a moment.
"They're supposed to be. But not everyone's works as expected and rather than fix it, the Tallests discard them. Some of them come here and… Some of them don't." I shift a little uncomfortably in my seat at the dark implication. Zim told me once about the self-destruct button that all Irkens are equipped with. I know what an Irken with a bad PAK is expected to do when the Tallests send them away. Irkens whose PAK doesn't work properly are expected to just disappear. If they can't be useful to the empire the Tallests tell them they have no purpose. Does that mean that Irkens with bad PAKs who come and join the OGI are all defectives? For refusing to be discarded? For being able to follow their own free will in deciding that they choose self preservation over any orders given by the Tallests?
"I… Haven't asked you this yet but… What about you?" I say finally and he perks and antenna.
"Me?"
"Well… It's just, you don't have a PAK." I say and then quickly add, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to but I just, I don't know. Zim's seems pretty essential but I haven't seen you with one."
"I don't have one. My body just rejects it. They tried to fit me for one twice but it never stays attached and my PAK attachments always close back up." He replies with a shrug.
"But Isn't the PAK responsible for preventing illness, maximizing life expectancy, all that stuff?" I ask, thoroughly confused. I remember Zim was fading away just ten minutes after his PAK was detached. He literally needs it to live.
"It is for everyone else but I guess not for me." He says back.
"Then what's your life expectancy?" I ask and he shrugs again. He has no idea? How can he be so calm not even knowing how long he'll live without a proper pak? How could there possibly be absolutely no research into this? We only met two days ago but we became pretty fast friends and this revelation isn't sitting well with me. An Irken without a PAK could have a significantly shorter lifespan compared to Irkens with one. But if he and Zim are the same age, which they are since they went to the same academy, that means Skoodge is over 200 earth years old. None of this makes any sense and I feel my head start to ache when he drags me from my thoughts, clearing his throat.
"You sounded a little freaked on the call." Right. That. A little? He's way too generous.
"It's just…" I start, unsure how to continue. We both turn towards the window as a couple of birds fly by and the moonlight shining into the room is momentarily blocked. "When Zim stopped by he was just off."
"How?"
"I don't know. He just wasn't himself at first. Like he was tired but he never gets tired. And I have a bad feeling about this whole thing."
"He never told me why the Tallests wanted to see him." Skoodge says and I pause for a moment. I guess it isn't really my place to divulge the information but I'm sure the bare minimum won't hurt. The whole reason we're here is because the Tallests are trying to figure out what is so wrong with Zim so that they can ensure no other Irken develops the same way. I guess if I were him, I wouldn't tell Skoodge that either. Or anyone for that matter.
"They said they're doing PAK analysis. But I…"
"Don't trust them?" He asks and I look at him. "It's okay, you can say that." he replies and I huff out a relieved sigh.
"I don't. And I don't understand why Zim does. Whatever it is that they're doing seriously put him in bad shape earlier. Even his eyes were… I don't know."
"Did you tell him that you're concerned?" He asks.
"Not really."
"Probably for the best. He wouldn't react well. But if it makes you feel any better, I'm sure he'll be okay."
"What makes you so certain?"
"Well, nothing any Tallest has ever done has gotten him hurt and they've obviously tried." He replies but I don't respond. He's right, Zim has beaten the odds hundreds of times. Whether intentionally or not, he's incredibly capable of taking care of himself. "Would you feel any better if I asked my contact what they know about the analysis?"
"Who is it?" I ask but I don't know why. It's not like I'd know anyone else here.
"I really can't say who it is. But I have a contact that should know what's going on."
"Just like you have a connection that delivers you snacks? And one that brings parts to build your ships?" I ask and he just chuckles a little.
"Not everyone who supports the OGI wants to live in a makeshift underground bunker. I'll ask around and see what I can find out, for you."
"I would really appreciate that." I say and he nods.
"You know your Irken is perfect. How long did it take you to learn?"
"Huh? Oh! No, I don't know Irken. I actually forgot that's what we're speaking right now. My disguise comes with a real time language translator." I explain, looping a finger under the black string and looking back towards the window.
"How?" He inquires, antenna perking upwards as he squints at the necklace.
"It's this pendant." I reply, pointing to the pink stone fused into the center base of my neck. "Here look." I say, unhooking the pendant from behind and taking it from my neck. "Now I'm speaking English. Which is from earth. But you have no idea what I'm saying so I have no idea why I'm even explaining and now it's getting weird that I'm still talking so I'm going to stop." His mouth drops and his eyes are blown wide, full of wonder and intrigue at the foreign sound. He starts talking to me excitedly but I don't understand any of it. Every sound I hear coming from him is completely inhuman and I haven't heard anything like it in years because I'm so used to hearing Zim and GIR speak English. It's so cool. It's a series of clicks and chirps of all different pitches and at the end of whatever he's saying all I really catch is an attempt at saying the word "English". I finally put my translator back on and he watches like it's the most fascinating thing he's ever seen.
"How come he made you such an intricate disguise if you aren't allowed to go anywhere?" He asks. "We have multipurpose community rooms and you'd be able to interact with others."
"I don't know, I think he's just overly cautious. But…" I start and he watches me expectantly. "I'd actually really like to get a look around. I mean this place seems huge and all I've seen are hallways, staircases and this room. If you don't have any other uh… leadership responsibilities for the night or um day, could you show me around?"
"I could do that but I am not going to. Zim said you have to stay here. And he told me to make sure that you do."
"Of course." I groan. "We wouldn't tell him though! And I'm already getting cabin fever from being cooped up in here!"
"What is cabin fever?" He asks, squinting an eye at me.
"Humans just start to not feel so good when we're confined for a long time."
"Oh… Are you ill?" He asks, concerned and immediately raises his communicator and starts typing things in until I put his arm back down.
"I'm fine! I just want to get out of here for a little bit." I reply and he hums in understanding.
"Next time Zim visits, I'll ask him about showing you around." He says and I sigh.
"Hey… Why do you do what he says, anyway?" I ask and he opens his mouth to reply then looks up at the ceiling as if the answer is up there, then looks at me again and shrugs. "…You have to have a reason… Right?" I continue and he just stares at me blankly.
"I guess I don't." He finally says and my eyes widen.
"You don't know why you do everything he says?" I ask, baffled.
"Well, why do you?" He asks.
"I don't!" I reply but he gives me a skeptical look. "Okay well, it's different."
"How?" He asks.
"It just is. We're…" My words fade out but he's still listening intently. "You wouldn't understand."
"Why do you both keep telling me that?" He asks.
"He told you that, too?" I ask back.
"Well yeah, when I asked him why it was necessary that he bring you along. Now that I've met you though, I'm glad that he did."
"I actually wish we'd met before this. I wasn't sure if any Irkens existed who were just genuinely nice. I've only ever interacted with Zim. And for a few days I knew this other Irken named Tak."
"Tak?" He asks.
"Yeah. She came to earth and tried to… it's a long story." I say, shaking my head.
"Zim said that about you too."
"Ha! He did?" I ask and he nods. "He's right. Our story is pretty long."
"I've never seen Zim care about anyone like this before. It is strange." He says thoughtfully.
"In the time that I've known him, neither have I. It makes me nervous sometimes."
"Why?"
"Because sometimes I'm just not sure if this is something he can do, you know?" I ask and he nods for a second but then shakes his head sheepishly and I sigh.
"You know how on some planets, people kind of pair off?" I ask and am met with a blank stare. "It's… It's the same thing as mating." I say finally and the realization dawns on him.
"You and Zim are mates?" He asks and I can feel my face start to heat up.
"Well on earth it's called dating, so let's just call it that. And please don't tell him or anyone I said that. I still don't know why he doesn't want you to know."
"Honestly, I think he's just tired of people judging him. He's got quite a track record here. I would never judge him though."
"I know you wouldn't. I think he struggles with trusting people, though." I say back.
"He does. And that's okay." Skoodge replies and then we're both staring out the window.
"Is there any way that I could… I want to know what's going on with the Tallests. Do you think I'd be able to follow him?"
"I'm sure he'd notice you following him. There's also no way for you to sneak onto the massive."
"I have to do something, though…" I insist, shaking my head. "I have to know exactly what's going on."
"Just take Zim's word for it."
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because I need to check and see for myself."
"You can't just go to the Massive, Dib. It doesn't work like that."
"I can figure it out. I just need you to tell me the code for my room."
"I can't. Zim said-"
"Skoodge, please."
"Think about this, okay? No one is safe around the Tallests. Especially not a human. No matter what's going on there, Zim is still way more likely to be okay than you would be." He emplores.
"I don't care."
"You should."
"I don't!"
"Why not?"
"Because I love him!" I exclaim before I can stop myself.
"You… you do?" He asks, confused.
"I…" I start, looking down at my invader uniform, then glancing around my room, the constellation comforter. The projection of all the stars twinkling around my ceiling and the hologram of my street back on earth just outside my window. All these things he did for me. To protect me. Not just from other people and the dangers he feels lurk on this planet, but also from myself. To protect me from my own mind. He's trying to protect me from things he doesn't even understand. "I do."
"So humans do the dating for love? Not reproduction?"
"I have no idea how to explain that right now. Yes and no. It's really situational…It's not important. What matters is that if the Tallests are trying to hurt him, if they do successfully, I'll never even get to tell him." I say and Skoodge looks really conflicted, staring down at his hands, tightly folded in his lap.
"Alright, listen." He finally begins, suddenly sitting up straighter with a serious expression and a firm tone. It reminds me, he's leader of an entire demographic. He's dedicated to taking care of other people. Not only that but he's become my friend. Between him and Zim, I am having trouble understanding why being a defective Irken is such a bad thing… "Zim would strangle me if I let you out to sneak onto the massive. Also, I mean I do like you and would prefer you not get eaten by the Digestor. So what if, in addition to getting information from my contact, I give you a bug?"
"A what?"
"A bug. All you would have to do is clip it to Zim's uniform and you'll be able to hear anything that's going on during the PAK analysis."
"Alright, I'll take what I can get." I reply eagerly but still in the back of my mind, I'm still trying to figure out how to get out of this room. What good would hearing the Tallests say they're trying to harm Zim do if I'm all the way over here? I wouldn't be able to do anything but listen to it. But Skoodge looks relieved that he thinks I'm done trying to get out of here and I won't be correcting him.
"Perfect! So I'll retrieve it and bring it back to you. Next time he visits, just stick it onto his uniform. Anywhere, but try not to put it somewhere the Tallests will notice. And obviously don't let Zim catch you bugging him or we'll both be sorry."
"Oh, definitely." I reply as we both stand up. I walk him to the door and he tells me he'll be back with the bug before leaving again and no matter how quiet I keep and how long I hold my breath I can't tell what number pattern he types to lock the front door from the other side. The palm mat on the inside of the room, to the left of the door, works seamlessly for both him and Zim but every time I try to use it, nothing happens at all. And maybe it won't even matter. Maybe when I hear what's going on on the Massive, I'll realize I was worrying for nothing. I do that a lot, anyway. This will confirm that there's nothing to worry about and then I can just focus on trying to convince Zim and Skoodge to let me explore the OGI bunker. All I have to do when Zim gets back is figure out how to pin the bug on his uniform, somewhere inconspicuous, and maybe then the knot wound in my stomach will dissolve.
I'm just staring at the palm mat on the wall lost in thought until I release an exaggerated sigh at the sound of Baby Shark starting up behind me. Apparently GIR is awake.