Kana spends her last day in Rivendell with Eiko, as much time as she can. She leaves the child with two scrolls – one for the very rare case that Eiko uses her chakra or activates her Sharingan, and another explaining Eiko's decision to become elves in terms of her mortality, in case Kana fails to return for a few years and something happened to Eiko. She really hopes the last one doesn't open. The Uchiha also leaves, with a bit of bittersweet amusement, the kunai that Eiko seemed so determined to get from her, saying that "a real ninja has at least one kunai".
It's November. Thanks to her help, the patrols went faster and after a month they were ready to go. Now, the teenager blinks her onyx eyes at the Fellowship gathered at Rivendell's gates, glancing at those who remain and their fellow travelers with something almost like nervousness and anticipation.
Heavens. She missed being on a mission. So much so, in fact, that she almost wishes there were some enemies soon – though, more than likely there won't be since Rivendell's guards have made sure of a thorough search.
"The time has come." - Said Elrond, taking away her attention, which repeatedly wandered to Eiko, in Glorfindel's arms, or, when not, to studying the Mirkwood elf.
"If the Ring is to go, it must go now. Do you still keep your word, Frodo, that you will be the Ringbearer?"
"Yes." - Said Frodo. – "I'll go with Sam."
"This is my last word." - He said in a low voice. – "The Ringbearer is setting out on the Quest of Mount Doom. Upon him alone are demands laid: that he does not discard the Ring, nor give it to any servant of the Enemy, nor even let anyone touch it, except for members of the Company, and even then only in case of extreme need."
"Good bits of advice." - She thinks, and, while listening only half attentively, she adjusts her mask over her face, when Legolas catches her looking at him. Her face burns with embarrassment over the slip; she is eternally grateful that the elf's first instinct is to smile back and, at most, raise a curious eyebrow. Oh, and of course, she was also grateful for her ever-constant mask because heaven knows how much pink her face turned at the slightest hint of embarrassment. Disadvantages of having pale skin like hers.
"The others go with him as free companions, to help him along the way. You are allowed to remain at any point, or to go back, or to deviate by other paths, as fate allows. The further you advance, the harder it is to retreat; yet no oath or pledge is imposed on you to continue beyond what you are willing."– Elrond is looking at her with a certain paternal tenderness when speaking those last words in particular. She wants to roll her eyes and ignore how that subtle signal that she could "give up," that she wasn't being forced to do anything, meant so much to her. She never really had anyone reassure her that it was "okay" if she didn't want to go on a mission. She was an Uchiha from Konoha. She had to accept the mission, whatever it was, and come back successfully.
Things were different in Middle-earth. She no longer had a Hokage or a village to answer to – though, she suspected she had found someone worth serving, but only the future would prove that. She still had to act out of duty, though, and in that sense, she was going on a mission because she didn't have as much of a choice as if she were in Konoha. This time though, her duty was that of a sister and she would never waver or regret any quest that might lead her to her brothers again.
"Leave now with courage in your hearts! Farewell, and may the blessing of Elves and Men and all the Free Peoples be with you. May the stars shine on your faces!"
It was a beautiful farewell, she thought, comparing this solemn but heartfelt atmosphere to her own dry and empty farewells in Konoha, from people who didn't really care if she came back alive.
She took the lead, having agreed with Gandalf and Aragorn (the unofficial leaders of the quest, she thinks) that, as she was faster, she could always do a short reconnaissance and bring back reports for them. The journey is excruciatingly slow for Kana, even when they aren't carrying any weight other than the storage scrolls she provided them with.
The Fellowship interacts with each other harmoniously, for the most part. There are still some arguments between the elf and the dwarf, but nothing is too exacerbated. In the first week, she noticed how the members grew closer and closer and a somewhat lonely feeling ignited in her, which usually refrained from accompanying the Society to reconnoiter the surroundings or, literally, to do anything that might be useful. It is Gandalf who tells her to join them more often. It's... odd at first, but Kana won't deny that hearing the laughter and seeing the camaraderie builds each day does give her yearnings for the same.
She is human, despite all of the clan systems and Konoha's attempts to make her merely a weapon.
They are all sharing food when she decides to join them. She ignores the curious gazes of the hobbits and the rest of the Fellowship, trying only to relax beside Gandalf (who seems quite pleased with her decision, the adorable old man that he was, Kana thinks). The Uchiha then starts to draw in one of the notebooks she asked to make during her stay in Rivendell, focusing on her own world, when one of the hobbits – Sam, if she remembers correctly – clears his throat and offers a plate of food, with a smile and a curious glance at the notebook she was sketching. Kana smiles back, even though her features are covered by her mask:
"Thanks, Sam." – She says, slightly surprised at herself that the hobbits manage to get the best of her and really make her thank them without even thinking about it. Although, she has yet to make progress with all other races. Kana puts the notebook aside, not caring that they see her drawing, and turns her back so that none of them would see her feed, except Gandalf who was beside her and could see her with a slight shake of his head. If she added a genjutsu so they couldn't make out her uncovered face even if they wanted to, oh well. She caught a glimpse of the mage shaking his head in exasperation at her choice not to allow others to see her.
"These drawings are made with impressive details. Too bad the subject is so... disgusting." - Faramir says, staring with morbid fascination, as well as the others, the drawings of the orcs that she had finished.
"If you find this disgusting, don't go to the last few pages. Anyway, this isn't meant to be pleasant; it is a catalog of the enemies I encountered."
"That's vile!" - Exclaimed the dwarf in disgust, and several expressions of agreement followed - even Gandalf and Aragorn looked ill. She turned her face slightly, careful not to be seen, as she looked at the study pages of the organs of some of the orcs.
"Oh, yes. Absolutely terrible job, couldn't eat properly for a few days after that. I almost left my hands raw from washing them so much."
"Did you really dissect them?" - Asks Legolas, something between disbelief and a hint of fear. When she looks at Gandalf and sees the same look, as if she were something dangerous and unpredictable, Kana shrinks a little, confused and a little unnerved by the reactions. The hobbits, she hoped, but the others were in battle before, right?
"Mn… Of course, after all, it's standard procedure when faced with a new species of threat." - She declares, crossing her arms defensively. – "Since the dice optimize the opponent's neutralization and, obviously, it serves for the record for the ninjas... um, later warriors so that they can already know in advance where to attack. You know, the usual. I mean, you're warriors too..."
Their faces still hold the horror, and now, something like genuine alarm. Aragorn, Gandalf, and Legolas seem to at least understand her reasoning. She swallows the hot soup. It suddenly looked a lot less appetizing than when she started and being in the circle between them with their judgmental eyes was making her uneasy.
"It's... it's not the usual procedure here, is it?" - She asks Gandalf. The wizard shakes his head solemnly and somewhat worriedly.
"No, Kana."
"Oh." – She says, biting her lips as she realizes that her already not very friendly first impression was getting worse and worse. "What an absolute disaster," she thinks, with embarrassment.
"You said this one isn't meant to be pleasant. Are there any others we can see?" – Legolas, God bless the gentle elf, intervenes, and Kana sighs in gratitude, finishing her food and then readjusting her mask, turning to face them. She rummages through her things, taking out a second notebook and handing it to Legolas, who has sat down on one of the rocks. Merry, Pippin, and Faramir joined him, while Aragorn, the dwarf, and the two remaining hobbits continued to look over their register of enemies, with varying expressions of horror in the latter and admiration in the first ones.
She fiddles with the hem of her shirt apprehensively as they see how she has drawn each of the Society's members.
"Look! That was three days ago! I didn't even know you were watching!" - Pippin says, excited, seeing a portrait of himself in an attempt to get Gandalf's pipe.
She shrugs, getting more and more relaxed as they talk about the drawings.
"This one is just a man." – Frodo says, thoughtfully, about the last page of the enemy catalog and Kana gets a rigid posture. – "Who is he?"
The elf watches her closely; since the trip began (even before, if he was being honest), the foreigner intrigued him. He wanted to ask so many questions – but that approach had never worked in Mirkwood with Kana and remained even now.
"Nobody." - She answers, a little more harshly than she intended, and then reaches out to take the notebook back. Legolas catches a glimpse of the drawing: a man with features somewhat similar to Kana: slanted eyes, straight black hair, and a blank expression. Holding a katana, he looked at the viewer impassively; there was blood dripping onto the sword and he glimpsed the image in the background as indiscernible shapes of bodies.
"It's like he's responsible for a massacre and he's looking for the next victim." – Legolas thinks, shuddering at the thought.
"I think it's good for drawings to..."
"Hey, this one I know. Yeah... His name was foreign too... I think... Kato? No... Katsuo!" – Faramir says, taking Kana's attention away from the hobbit unintentionally. The Gondorian looks thoughtful and looks to her for confirmation, surprised when she appears before him in the blink of an eye and takes him by the shoulders.
"Are you sure? Where have you seen it? How was he? He is alive? Dead? Wounded, hostage, had someone with him, a younger boy...?"
She says almost in one breath, squeezing the man tighter and tighter, an unusual desperation showing in what was visible in her onyx eyes. It was the biggest display of emotion they'd gotten so far from the mystery woman. The prince already knew why Kana was with him – with the Fellowship, the elf corrects himself – on this journey: the search for his younger brothers. While it was something Eiko let slip, he still felt privileged that Kana didn't deviate from the subject and actually explained – vaguely – what had happened to the little ones. He waits for the information hoping it's good news, worried for the woman if it isn't.
"Yes, I'm sure. He is a protégé my brother encountered during a patrol watching the surroundings of the battle of Osgiliath. At the time, he was injured, but we treated the boy and the beast that walks with him. He is in Gondor and he was alive and well when I left a few months ago. There were no other children besides Katsuo."
She lets out a breath she's been holding and runs a hand over her face, letting the hood that covered her head fall, revealing her long black hair in a simple braid.
"One of them is alive. This... this is... better than I expected." - She says, relief punctuating every word.
"I'm glad to hear one of your brothers is okay. The Men of Gondor will keep him safe until you can reunite with him." - Says Gandalf, sincere in sharing Kana's relief and, to Kana's absolute surprise, he even ruffled the top of her head affectionately. She blinks and realizes her rant in front of the entire squad, feeling young and stupid. She clears her throat and scratches the back of her neck awkwardly.
"Wait... are you his sister? He said that all of his family members were dead." - The blonde asks, confused.
"Oh."
Kana sighs and then sits down again, her posture as relaxed as possible; she needed to get some control over her anxiety or she would end up playing the role of an inexperienced and easily shaken genin, showing signs of weakness.
"He probably thinks I'm still dead. And it wouldn't be too hard to conclude that Eiko and Riki were too since I was their best chance of survival."
"Still dead?" – The archer asks with a sharp look in her direction and if anyone noticed that he had approached Kana, sitting beside her, nobody said anything.
"Mn. I've been... dead. For some time." – She shrugged.
"You were dead?" – Sam exclaims, eyes wide. – "Is that even possible?"
"On rare occasions, yes, Samwise." – Aragorn says, seriously.
"Glorfindel, one great among the Elves, met this fate." – Legolas says, and Kana feels uncomfortable with the amount of attention she was receiving, and then, suddenly, she gets up.
"It's getting dark. I will do reconnaissance of the area." – She says, disappearing in a puff of smoke.
"This woman keeps getting weirder." - The dwarf comments with a snort, having several nods.
"I would say fascinating." – The elf thinks.
The hobbits, meanwhile, talked about how she had died, creating theories and even Faramir joined in the speculation. When the stories began to tell how some enemy sought revenge for the dissected members of unknown men – at that point, the image of the woman was increasingly bloody – the mage, who listened, interfered, solemn and somewhat reproachful.
"Enough. Kana is not the monster you are painting." - He says incisively to Merry and Pippin.
"She is a woman who has suffered a lot and doesn't know how to open up. I know little about her, despite my best efforts to get closer, but what I do know makes me think she grew up in a place that forced her to grow up too fast and do things she didn't even fully understand."
"She has some signs of some warriors experienced with traumatic situations." - Says Aragorn, nodding his head in agreement, taking a pipe, and joining Gandalf in the smoke. – "I saw her sleeping once, still in Rivendell, Eiko was playing with Erestor and they approached her, who was very restless in her sleep. Erestor almost had his wrist broken when he tried to wake her up with a tap on the shoulder."
"I fear there is much more to Kana's story." - Says Gandalf heavily. – "I met her under dire circumstances. Anyone, regardless of race or gender, would have a terrible time dealing with what she had to deal with. You didn't see what I saw. She was…" – The mage sighed, shaking his head. – "Terribly hurt. Tortured and blind. She never told me how long she was in captivity before I met her. Many things could have happened to this woman, but I think it wasn't just that one occasion. She seemed to have experience with being captured by enemies and all the little things she talks about: it's like she's been trained for it. Not only fight and be a warrior but to endure a lot of hardships."
Legolas clenched his fists, uncomfortable and uneasy with the facts he was now discovering. He knows it must be true. There had always been something distinctly dangerous and an aura of experience about her, and yet he found himself surprisingly sad and distressed by what she might have gone through.
"Like earlier. About the orcs." – Faramir says, referring to the cataloging of the organs and anatomy of several species in that notebook of hers.
"Yes. So, before you go judging her, know that she, despite everything she went through is a good person. When we were about to leave our captivity, she returned for her brother. If it weren't for Kana, I wouldn't be here now, nor would Halleth have returned to Rivendell, nor the women Kana saved after returning to life. She is brave and, even with some decisions that shock us, she has a sense of justice that is by no means of a servant of the Enemy, despite her overtures, Master Gimli."
"Do you know how she died?" – Legolas asks Gandalf, who nods, melancholy.
"Only what she told me. And I don't believe that's the whole truth. When she returned to save her brother... presumably, Saruman found her and tried to stop it. For Kana told me that she died when the White Tower fell - but only a force like Saruman's could be the cause of this collapse."
A silence ensues, everyone's thoughts returning to the mysterious company, until Frodo breaks it, in an attempt to lighten the mood:
" At least now you know what it's like to have an enigma to solve, Gandalf."
"Not just him." - The elf thinks, several times during the following week, every now and then his eyes turning to where he knew Kana was watching them, from afar.
He found himself becoming more and more involved in the task of watching Kana when she was around. To his personal delight, Kana seemed to prefer his or Gandalf's company, when she chose to join them without hiding. Is that why the next night, he's slightly... upset? Astonished? Displeased. When she suddenly appears before Faramir and hovers around the human for a while.
He can't help but become a little more attentive when the two seem to stay behind and she actually strikes up a conversation with said man.
"She hardly starts a conversation with anyone. Not even with me or Gandalf." - The blonde thinks, about to pout. That changes, however, when he hears her first words and the way she has a certain slightly familiar reluctance and awkwardness.
"For your shoulder..." – She says and Legolas sees that she hands what looks like an ointment to the man. The human widens his eyes and then unconsciously moves his shoulder, hesitant to accept the ointment. Legolas understands then: she had hurt him the night before, by squeezing the human's shoulders. The elf then lags a little behind herself, sneaking up on her.
"I... well, it's just... M-mn..." – She gestures, still holding the ointment awkwardly with one hand and the other hand scratching the back of her neck; a gesture that the elf was beginning to notice was a gesture used when she was nervous or embarrassed. - "The news from you had me a little… surprised. You have no idea how much they mean to me..."
She trails off. A smile forms on the elf's face, appreciating her embarrassment, and then, close enough, he appears behind her with a mischievous and good-natured expression:
"She's trying to say 'sorry' and 'thank you', Faramir."
"Oh!" - The man widens his eyes in understanding and then accepts the ointment, with a gentle and a little uncertain smile. "Thank you, Lady Kana."
She gives an awkward wave and approaches the elf, glancing at him briefly with something halfway grateful in her gaze. In fact, she even looked like she was smiling at him – and he really wished he could see that, without the mask to cover it.
Ah, that mask. The elf was more and more anxious for the day when he would see her without that mask – because he realized now that, when that day came, it is because Kana trust him and, perhaps, it would be proof that he had earned her friendship.
And the elf really wanted that. At first, it was out of curiosity, but for a while, it was compassion – for the sadness, she emitted when no one was paying attention (or it was just because he was a little more sensitive to emotions, he's not sure), but now it's because he liked her company.
Somewhere between the sparring practices with her, and the relaxing quiet moments they shared in Rivendell while Eiko played amongst them, Legolas realized that Kana was a person he wanted to get to know more, not just out of mere curiosity, but because he wanted to create a genuine connection with the mysterious woman.
And that will happen. It could be a challenge, it could take years, and it would probably be as difficult as trying to break down the walls of a fortress...but the elf is patient, and he feels that the process of getting to know her would be worth every minute.
Author's Note:
Sorry for the late update, I had a hard time with that transition scene (and it didn't even turn out the way I thought it would, I thought it was going to be more action, but instead the scene ended up being about the Fellowship trying to interact with Kana and her discovering that at least one of the children is fine). Oh, and as for Legolas, I'm trying to slowly portray his interest in Kana, I hope it's getting realistic.
I will try to update on day 21 of January.