Since somebody favorited this fanfic I figured I would continue it. It's been a very long time after all. And yes, I'm basically bringing this fanfic back from the dead. I figure some people might be happy if I do that.

I hope you enjoy it. It might not be worth such a long wait but still!

This arc is based on the sixth book in the series. I could say the title but it's kind of long. I believe it was lampshaded how long the title for Book 3 was. And yes, it will feature Sulu. I happen to like the hamster. I wouldn't kill him off personally because people get salty when you kill the animal.

I don't think an animal's life is worth more than a human's but I understand if you care about animals. Animals are an important part of life. Though I would be a bit hesitant to adopt a bionic hamster. They might behave themselves but I want to make sure. Though I wouldn't object to a hamster that lived longer.

Chapter 7: The Harassed Hamster

Jenny was walking down the street, making sure to look both ways so she didn't get in trouble for jaywalking.

She then saw Melvin.

He was with his pet hamster, Sulu. He was taking him for a walk.

She decided to wave hello to him.

George and Harold didn't seem to like him (they referred to him as a tattletale), but she felt that she should give him a chance.

"I see you have a pet hamster!" exclaimed Jenny.

She thought he was cute, to say the least.

Now that she thought of it, Melvin wasn't the only one in her class to have pets.

He heard that Harold had a lot of goldfish.

Hopefully he could feed them all.

"Since my cat kept making me sneeze, I figured it was time for a new pet." spoke Melvin.

"Good call." noted Jenny. She knew that she wouldn't want a pet that she was allergic to.

Now he wouldn't have to get allergy medicine.

To her knowledge, she was not allergic to any types of animals. Though she would let people know if that was the case. People brought animals to show-and-tell sometimes.

"He'll be helpful with my research." said the smart boy.

"I'm sure that he will. Wait, what research?" asked Jenny.

She noticed that Sulu was looking nervous.

Before she could ask him questions about that, Melvin had already left.

"I'm starting to worry about that hamster." noted the girl.

Perhaps she should delve into what research she was doing on that hamster, who was being used as...a guinea pig.

If it was unethical, then it had to stop.

She had seen what mad science could create, for one. And she had heard what Professor Poopypants had tried to do when he was made fun of one too many times. Even if she wasn't there to see it in person.

As it turned out, she did not have to investigate for long.

Melvin had brought Sulu with him for show and tell the next day.

"Introducing my bionic hamster!" exclaimed Melvin.

The other students looked at Sulu curiously.

Did Melvin really make a bionic hamster?

"You made him bionic?" questioned Jenny.

That was...interesting.

But was it such a good idea?

Hamsters could be mischievous. Sulu didn't look dangerous, but some animals were more dangerous than they looked. You had to be able to defend yourself in the wild, after all.

There were scientists who didn't stop to think whether they should do something, just what they could create.

"Alright, Sulu, show us to the audience what you're capable of. Fly across the room!" exclaimed Melvin.

Sulu was currently taking a nap.

George and Harold chuckled.

It looked as if Sulu hadn't graduated from obedience school.

Though they did admit that it would be really cool if he really were a bionic hamster. They could make a comic book based on him. Even if they were already making comics about Captain Underpants. Perhaps he could star alongside Super Diaper Baby.

Melvin was not amused at his hamster's disobedience, though George and Harold certainly were.

"If you don't do as you're told I'm going to spank you!" bellowed the boy.

"Take it easy!" shouted Jenny.

Sulu still did not wake up.

He must be pretty tired.

"Alright, you asked for it!" exclaimed Melvin. Sulu had disobeyed him and he was going to pay the price for it.

He began to smack Sulu's heinie.

This made the unfortunate hamster whimper.

Even if he did have a bionic exoskeleton for protection.

"Stop that!" demanded Jenny. This was animal abuse. People shouldn't treat their pets like that. People that abused animals could end up hurting people as well.

George and Harold couldn't help but feel a bit worried about the hamster.

Seeing as Jenny actually cared about him, he decided that he would run towards her.

Melvin was astonished at the occurrence.

Had his pet decided to turn on him?

To his knowledge, it was all Jenny's fault.

Melvin glared at her.

"Jenny! You're stealing my hamster!" shouted the boy with the glasses.

"Huh?" asked Jenny. She wasn't sure what he was talking about.

Melvin shook his fist at her.

"Um, I think he came to me because you were abusing him." questioned the girl who cared for animals.

Sulu nodded.

Melvin snarled.

When class was over, Jenny decided to ask Sulu a question.

"Are you really bionic?" asked Jenny. There was a chance that Melvin was exaggerating, but she wanted to know for sure.

Sulu began to fly.

"That's amazing!" exclaimed the girl.

As to why he was sleepy...well, he had been awake that night as Melvin combined him with a bionic exoskeleton.

It was kind of hard to sleep through that. It wasn't a painful procedure, but it was pretty exciting.

Jenny asked her parents if she could adopt a hamster. Sulu clearly didn't want to be with Melvin anymore. There might be a chance that he would want to conduct more experiments on him. And considering that he had spanked his heinie, they might not be humane.

Her parents nodded. They knew that she was responsible.

She wouldn't tell them that Sulu was a bionic hamster just yet.

Her parents would likely be shocked to hear that...but Jenny felt that Sulu deserved a life free of abuse.

"You'll behave yourself, right?" asked Jenny.

Sulu nodded. He appreciated Jenny taking him in.

He didn't know her too well, but he got the feeling that she would be a better owner to him than Melvin was.

"Melvin really made a bionic hamster?" asked Harold. Part of him wished that his goldfish were bionic. But he figured he shouldn't be blind to what he already had. He had loving pets, did he not?

"We made a bionic man, basically. We shouldn't be surprised. We had the technology for it." noted George. Though they had to be careful that Mr. Krupp wasn't in earshot when somebody started snapping their fingers.

"Yeah, and Jenny made a bionic woman." remarked the blonde boy who contrary to what one might expect was not dumb.

A few days later, there was a science fair. And yes, this wasn't in the book. The author decided to make creative liberties with the source material. Though the story wasn't going to be drastically changed.

And besides, there was one in Book 2.

Melvin was looking forward to what the judges thought on his project.

This time, he had made a robot hamster.

Apparently, he wanted to replace his old hamster with one that would be completely obedient to him.

"What do you think, hamster stealer?" asked Melvin, who had a smug grin on his face. It seemed that he thought he was going to win first prize for sure, even though there were several other kids competing. Even if he wasn't able to bring Sulu with him like he did with show and tell.

"It's...impressive." noted Jenny. She wondered if Melvin was going to blame Sulu abandoning him entirely on her. Some people just didn't own up to what they did.

She had gone with the classic baking volcano.

George and Harold had recommended they make it spew jelly.

They loved jelly. They would want to thank whoever invented PBJ.

So she incorporated that into the volcano.

It would make it more creative, after all.

Jenny waited for the judges to arrive.

But when they did, they discovered that the projects had been sabotaged.

"George and Harold are up to their old tricks, aren't they?" thought Jenny.

To be fair, she did think what they did was pretty funny.

She would appreciate it if they didn't sabotage something that people worked hard on.

Although, she did feel that Melvin's ego should be toned down a peg.

"No!" exclaimed Melvin. His robot hamster had been short-circuited. He pressed his hands against the side of his face.

George and Harold chuckled to themselves. This prank had gone off perfectly.

Jenny found it sweet that the two troublemakers had decided not to sabotage her project on account of their friendship, which she thought was sweet. George and Harold had standards, it seemed.

However, this made Melvin accuse her.

"You planned all this, didn't you?" asked Melvin.

"What? No!" exclaimed Jenny. She was surprised as he was.

"I will have my revenge!" screamed the boy. Nobody humiliated Melvin Sneedly and got away with it. Though George and Harold thought they could get away with anything until Mr. Krupp caught them.

Since the judges liked the originality of Jenny's project, they gave her first prize. She would thank George and Harold later...though not for sabotaging the other contestants. It was an enjoyable prank but she felt that maybe they should reconsider doing such a thing in the future.

"You don't mind me winning the science fair, did you? I didn't intend for all this to happen." noted Jenny. It was funny but she didn't intend to win through sabotaging the competition. There were more important things to her than winning. Like her friends.

Everyone clapped and cheered for the winner of the science fair.

Personally, they felt that she deserved to win. She was a very nice girl. More than can be said for Melvin. It was sad that their projects had been sabotaged but at least there was still a clear winner.

Though they wished that George and Harold hadn't been so mischievous. Why was Jenny friends with them again?

To be fair, they didn't want Melvin to win. He was rubbing his project in front of everyone's faces.

"Alright then!" exclaimed the girl.

George and Harold showed Jenny a comic they made making fun of Melvin.

They showed what a tattletale he was...and how he somehow became president.

Making him president was a disaster. He passed so many laws that it became virtually impossible not to break them. The United States was not a happy place to live in at all.

Sure enough, all the cells became full. With the election of Melvin the public had lost their freedom.

"This seems more like a dictatorship than a presidency if you ask me." noted Jenny. It seemed that Melvin was calling all the shots now that he was president. That wasn't how a democracy worked. She studied history. Though George and Harold seemed to find that subject boring.

George nodded.

Melvin decided to build a robot so that he could house more prisoners. It was a pretty big robot. Who knows where the budget to build it came from?

Luckily, Captain Underpants put an end to his tyranny.

Now the United States would have the freedom to what they want again...so long as it didn't hurt other people.

If you asked her, Melvin was more of a criminal in that comic than all the people that he arrested. Maybe they should have named the comic book Captain Underpants vs. The Big Fat Hypocrite. Though Big Fat Tattletale did have a nice ring to it.

'You two might want to be careful. I'm pretty sure Mr. Krupp is going to investigate this." noted Jenny.

He was anything if not furious about it.

Edith might be willing to tolerate their pranks, but Mr. Krupp was a whole different story.

But as it turned out, it was in fact Melvin that they had more to worry about.

Melvin stormed back to his house, feeling as angry as Professor Poopypants did when George and Harold made a comic making fun of him. To be fair, everyone else was making fun of him at the time. Now they feared him.

"I'll get my revenge on those losers!" exclaimed Melvin. They would pay for humiliating him at the science fair. And Jenny would also pay for having them sabotage the project, unwilling to believe in her innocence.

Luckily, he had just the invention that he needed to get his revenge on them.

Using his device, he would combine himself with a bionic exoskeleton.

Everybody would respect him this way.

And even Jenny would admit that he was smarter than he was. Or so he thought anyway.

The device in question was known as the Combine-o-tron 2000. He was glad that he didn't bring it with him to the science fair. Otherwise he wouldn't have been able to use it. For some reason it looked like an ice cream cone. But we're not dwelling on that.

Using that device, he would be the most popular kid in school.

He would be more popular than Jenny, was that was for sure.

Little did he know that Jenny was popular for her charisma...which Melvin was lacking in. One could argue that she deserved to be popular more than Melvin himself did.

George, Harold, and Jenny would all submit to him. He would be so much better than those losers.

"Big muscles, here I come!" exclaimed Melvin as he activated his unique machine.

But just when he activated the Combine-o-tron, his cat came into the room.

This ended up causing him to sneeze.

Perhaps it would have been a good idea to close the door so that his cat didn't wander in during one of his experiments. After all, he could have ended up being combined with his cat.

Unfortunately, this meant that Melvin's face was now covered in snot.

And the narrator won't dwell on that because he doesn't want to make the audience sick. He's got to look out for his fans, after all. They're the reason he continues writing these fanfics.

'Thank you, kind narrator!" exclaimed George.

You're welcome, George. But you're not at Melvin's house, are you?

"I can still hear your voice." explained the boy.

I see.

Unfortunately, the transformation happened before Melvin could wipe off the snot.

He was going to make one heck of an entrance at school tomorrow.

People weren't going to forget it anytime soon.

Perhaps Melvin should have come up with a method to reverse the transformation in case he changed his mind. And he should do something about that cat. You shouldn't have a pet if you're allergic to it, am I right?

As it is, he's stuck in this form for the next six months.

To be fair, his hamster pet did decide to turn on him. So the cat was kind of what he had left.