Author's note: Oh wow, it's been too long lol. You know it's funny, I'm far enough ahead in the story that I decided instead of waiting to upload a new chapter every time I finish writing a chapter, I'd upload every time I finish half a chapter. So right now I'm on chapter 12 and I finally got to the halfway point and it's already over 6000 words hahaha. I really hope it doesn't actually get up to 12k words...
Anyway, please enjoy! :D
Ghost on the Couch
April 3 (part one)
Out on the streets, patrolling late at night. Danny didn't even know what kind of animal this ghost was supposed to resemble. A tiger? A wolf? Some sort of weird cross between them?
All he could definitely be sure of was that its claws were sharp and they hurt.
The ghost slammed a paw across his face, tearing a gash in his cheek. Danny cried out and held a hand to the wound, ectoplasm dripping between his gloved fingers.
He was so done with this. He was so tired and he just wanted to sleep.
He aimed a heavily concentrated ecto-ray at the ghost. The ghost howled and slammed into a nearby building, pieces of its walls cracking and falling to the asphalt below. Danny aimed a Thermos at the ghost and sealed it inside.
He hovered there for a while, panting and shaking. The building was significantly damaged. Great, he had wrecked more public property. More reason for everyone to hate him. Nice going, dumbass.
There were at least a couple thinking errors in those thoughts, but he had sworn off Brandan's stupid advice for combating cognitive distortions. Now he was no longer reflexively identifying them. It certainly did him no good anyway.
He checked the time on his phone, ignoring the notifications for missed calls and texts because they were probably all from Tucker and Sam, nothing important.
It was well past midnight. On a school night. The weekend was already over, and he'd have to be up and ready for school in a few hours.
Monday. The beginning of yet another week.
But hey…
It was after midnight. It was officially Monday now. Which meant he had made it to his sixteenth birthday.
He hovered a little longer, somewhat stunned and numbed. He had been so sure he wouldn't make it to this milestone, and yet here he was, sixteen and still here, still alive.
He wasn't sure whether to feel relieved or disappointed.
He flew toward home, feeling more and more exhausted. Was he more sleep-deprived than he realized? When was the last time he had actually gotten not just enough sleep but good sleep? Sleep that was deep and restful and energizing? When was the last time he woke up without wishing he could just stay in bed forever?
Maybe he needed to take a night off. Maybe for his birthday, he'd treat himself by going to bed early for once.
He phased through his window and sighed in relief as he morphed back into his normal form and set his cell phone on his nightstand. He hid his Thermos under his bed, too tired to go down to the basement lab now to release the captured ghost. He wasn't even sure he had the energy to change into his pajamas or brush his teeth.
He flopped down on his bed and pulled his blanket over him, nestling into his pillow. He could feel himself drifting off almost immediately.
His light suddenly switched on. Danny moaned and squinted in the assaulting brightness.
"Danny, where the hell have you been?"
Danny immediately shot up into a sitting position. Maddie stood over him with hands on her hips, her eyes fiercely narrowed, her mouth austerely curved downward.
Danny winced and looked down at his lap, fumbling with his blanket. "I—well—"
"What happened to your face?" she asked sharply, her tone a mixture of anger and concern.
Danny placed a hand on his left cheek, the memory of the ghost creature scratching him resurfacing, the dull pain immediately returning. Dried blood from the wound was caked below on his jaw and neck.
"I, uh—" He hadn't had time to plan a story, had completely forgotten the injury had happened at all until just now. "I—I was walking home and it was dark and… There was this tree with low-hanging branches and I walked right into it. I mean, one of the branches cut my face."
"A branch did that?" asked Maddie, furrowing her brow and pursing her lips.
Danny nodded and shifted under his blanket. Maddie continued to study him before sighing and stomping up to him.
"Come on. Get up." Maddie grabbed his arm and pulled him out of bed. Danny stumbled after her out of his room and into the bathroom across the hall. She turned on the faucet and ran a small towel under the water.
"You know your father and I only let you go out on school nights because we trust you, right?" She dabbed the wet towel at his face and neck, gently rubbing away the blood. Her touch was so soft and motherly, but her tone was stern and frustrated. "We expect you to come home by nine on school nights, and if you're going to be even a little late, you have to text us and let us know."
Danny kept his gaze down on the sink. "I—I'm sorry, I just lost track of—"
"Why didn't you answer your phone?" Her voice began to shake. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? I've been up all night waiting for you because I couldn't sleep until I was sure you were safe."
Danny thought about the cell phone he had just placed on his bedside table, about the notifications for missed calls and texts he ignored. Stupid.
"You know when your curfew is on school nights." Maddie ran the towel under water again with a small amount of soap before raising it back up to his face. "You've been pushing it for a while now, you've been late so many times—"
"Not that late usually!" insisted Danny. "And I haven't been this late since—"
"Late is late," said Maddie sternly. "A few minutes, a few hours, doesn't matter. I've told you already that curfew isn't negotiable." She glared at him. "Maybe your father and I need to stop trusting you so much."
Danny flinched. "Mom, I—"
"No, don't bother." Maddie opened the bathroom cabinet and pulled out a tube of antibiotic cream and a bandage. She applied the cream over his cut. "I don't want to hear any excuses or apologies. You're not getting out of this one."
Danny obediently kept his mouth shut and waited for her to continue.
Maddie placed the adhesive bandage over the gash and pressed it to his face. "You're grounded until further notice. I don't know how long. I'll have to talk it over with your father. But you're not allowed to go out at all for a while."
"What? But—"
"You heard me. But I don't even know if I should really bother. You never seem to change no matter what we try to do with you."
Danny winced. Was she starting to see him as a lost cause beyond all help? Was he only a major disappointment to her?
Of course he was. Why else would she be forcing him to go to therapy? She clearly thought more drastic measures were needed if he was going to somehow be fixed and become someone she could be proud of.
"I really am sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to—"
"You didn't mean to get caught." Maddie shook her head. "Don't, Danny. We'll talk about it tomorrow. Just get some sleep so I don't get teachers telling me you fell asleep during class again."
She swiftly marched out of the bathroom, leaving him in lonely, haunting silence.
What a great start to his birthday.
…
In the last class of the day, Danny dropped his head on his desk and waited for the starting bell. Students chatted and milled around him, getting situated at their own desks.
"Mr. Fenton." Lancer was suddenly standing beside him. "You're not planning on sleeping during my class again, are you?"
Danny lifted his head. "No, Mr. Lancer," he said quietly.
Lancer frowned. "What happened to your face?"
Danny touched the bandage on his cheek. "Just a cut. It's nothing."
Lancer studied him a little longer before walking back to the head of the classroom. Danny then took notice of the two desks in front of him that were still unoccupied.
Sam and Tucker had said they had something to do first and that they'd meet him in class, but they were cutting it awfully close. The bell would be ringing in less than thirty seconds.
At last, his two friends entered the classroom, Tucker holding a covered tray in his hands. Danny watched them curiously as they approached.
"Happy birthday!" they chorused as Tucker set the tray in front of Danny and uncovered it to reveal a large white cake with decorative green frosting and blue iced lettering that also wished him a happy birthday.
Danny stared at the cake, a few other students crowding around him and vocalizing their excitement. He knew he needed to say something, but no words were coming to mind. The bell rang, covering for his stunned silence.
"Lancer said we could bring in a cake for you," explained Tucker as he began placing candles on the cake.
"Hey, I also said you could not light candles in the classroom, Mr. Foley," barked Lancer from behind his desk.
"We're not," insisted Tucker with a small whine, hiding a lighter behind his back. "We're just gonna pretend."
Danny continued to stare at the cake, at the arrangement of the candles, all sixteen of them.
"I… I don't know what to say," he stammered.
"Well, you're sixteen now," said Sam. "It's a pretty big deal. And just so you know, I allowed it to be non-vegan just this once."
Danny smiled at her. "Are you going to have a piece?"
"Of course not." Sam rolled her eyes. "But you deserve something you'd actually like."
"Yeah, vanilla cake with buttercream frosting," said Tucker. "Your favorite, dude."
"Ooh, it's so pretty," gushed Paulina from behind him. "Are we gonna sing to Danny?"
Danny covered his eyes. "Oh, God, please don't."
Tucker grabbed his shoulders and playfully shook him. "It would embarrass him, so of course we're gonna sing."
Danny sank low in his seat. "Okay, then don't record it."
"Oh, I'm recording it," said Sam, holding up her phone and directing it at him.
Danny uncomfortably sat at his desk while everyone in the class began singing to him in loud, off-key voices. His face grew hotter and hotter as the song continued, but he tried to smile in good nature. When the song finally ended, Danny inclined his head in relief.
"Okay, dude, make a wish and blow out the candles," said Tucker.
"But they're not lit," said Danny.
"You still deserve a wish!"
Danny's mind churned. Did he deserve a wish? Had he earned having a wish granted?
He didn't think so.
He leaned over and pretended to make a wish, then just as he was about to pretend to blow out the candles, Tucker whipped out his lighter and lit the one right in front of him.
"Hey, what did I tell you?" yelled Lancer.
Danny froze for only a moment before blowing out the single candle. Everyone laughed while Danny leaned back feeling even hotter than before.
"Mr. Foley, I'll be seeing you during lunch tomorrow for detention," said Lancer sternly.
"Fine, fine," said Tucker, then dropping his voice to whisper to Danny, "Totally worth it."
Using a plastic knife, Tucker cut the cake into pieces while Sam served them on paper plates with plastic forks, for once not lecturing anyone on how all of this plastic cutlery was bad for the environment.
"Man, Fenton, this is good," said Dash from his desk with a full bite in his mouth. "For once, I'm really glad you were born."
A few people chuckled and playfully agreed with him. Danny smiled weakly and ate a small bite of cake to appease Sam and Tucker.
But as Lancer began his lecture, Danny could only think about Dash's words.
Was he himself glad that he was born? Disappointing his parents, struggling to get good grades, painfully zapping himself and then feeling obligated to fight off all the ghosts he had accidentally given easy access to the town? Constantly worrying about the safety of his friends and family? All of the injuries and trauma he couldn't even seek professional medical help for? The failures and near deaths?
If he had been given a choice to be born knowing that this was going to be his life, would he have accepted it?
He had no idea.
After class, Danny headed out the classroom door with Sam and Tucker. Tucker carried what was left of the cake.
"Hey, guys, I didn't say it before, but…" Danny gave them a genuine smile. "Thanks for bringing in a cake for me."
"You should probably be thanking Sam," said Tucker. "It was her idea."
"But we both paid for it," said Sam.
Danny exhaled in amusement. "You guys are great."
"So, we still going to the game center today?" asked Tucker. "I'm so psyched to play laser tag."
"Yeah, I miss beating both you boys at laser tag," said Sam. "It's been way too long."
"Now, Sam, maybe you should go a little easy on us this time," said Tucker. "Or at least Danny. I mean, it is his birthday."
"Yeah, you've finally joined the sixteen club." Sam elbowed him gently. "Now we're all the same age again."
"Our spring chicken is all grown up," teased Tucker.
Danny rolled his eyes. "I'm only a couple months younger than you two."
"And you always will be," said Sam with a smirk. "All right. Let's get our stuff and go!"
Danny slowed, remembering with horror that it wasn't just his birthday.
It was Monday.
And he was grounded.
"Um… I can't hang out today," he said, staring down at the floor.
"Huh? Why?" asked Sam. "It's your birthday! Of course you can hang out, can't you?"
Danny winced. "Um, well… I'm kind of...grounded."
"Grounded?" echoed Tucker. "On your birthday?"
"What happened?" asked Sam.
"Um…" Danny still couldn't look at them. "I came home pretty late after patrol last night, and my mom...kind of noticed. And was pretty pissed off." He sighed. "I didn't mean to come home late, but, you know, I can't just quit fighting ghosts just because it's close to curfew." He pointed to the bandage on his face. "I told you that's how I got this, remember?"
"You did tell us," said Tucker. "But what I don't get is why you didn't tell us last night you were going out on patrol."
"Yeah," agreed Sam. "Why don't you tell us you're going out to fight ghosts anymore, Danny? We could've helped you out and made sure you got home before curfew."
Danny studied his friends as he quickly tried to come up with an answer that would satisfy them. Not the truth; they wouldn't like the truth. If he were to confess that he felt guilty asking them to put themselves in danger just to help him or even just to keep him company during lonely ghost-fighting nights, they'd scold him and be offended for sure.
And no, this was not jumping to conclusions. This was just what he knew for sure would happen, and he just didn't want to deal with his friends' scrutiny and disapproval. Certainly not on his birthday.
"It was a school night." Danny shrugged. "I honestly thought it'd just be a quick look around the town. I didn't plan on being out for more than an hour. So I just didn't want to bother you guys. I didn't expect there to be as many ghosts as there were."
"But that's the point," said Sam. "You don't know if there will be more trouble until it happens, and if you tell us, then we'll be there to help if it gets rough!"
"We want to be there for you, Danny," said Tucker. "I mean, aren't we supposed to be a team? Didn't we all agree to fight and take these ghosts back to the Ghost Zone together?"
Danny had no answer to give, no words at all. All he had was guilt, guilt for ever asking them to risk their lives, guilt for breaking up their team dynamic even if it was because he wanted to protect them just as much as he wanted to protect the rest of the town.
"Hey." Sam touched his arm. "We can talk about this later. Let me drive you home, okay? And maybe we can talk to your mom about letting you go out with us. I mean, she wouldn't deny you some fun on your sixteenth birthday, would she?"
"Ooh, yeah, I'm so good at begging." Tucker straightened his bag on his shoulders. "I can be very persuasive, you know."
Sam and Tucker started talking strategies as they led the way out of the school. Danny stayed behind, sweating over how he was going to tell them he couldn't let Sam drive him home. His two friends stopped and turned back to look at him when they realized he wasn't following them.
"Danny? Come on, let's go!" said Sam.
"I...can't go with you," mumbled Danny. "My mom's picking me up."
"Your mom?" Sam frowned. "She's picking you up again?"
"Is she taking you to the mall to get even more clothes?" quipped Tucker.
"No, she, um…" Danny played with his backpack strap. "She's just taking this whole grounded thing seriously. She wants to make sure I come straight home after school."
"She won't even let Jazz take you home?" asked Sam.
"No. Just, ah...just her." Danny checked the time on his phone. "I should go meet her before she gets mad."
"Okay, we'll go with you," said Sam, sounding determined. "We'll talk to her and beg her to let you hang out with us for at least a couple hours. She's just gotta let you celebrate your sixteenth birthday!"
"Yeah!" exclaimed Tucker. "Time for my best pitiful puppy dog eyes."
Tucker practiced his expression on Sam, who playfully shoved his shoulder.
"Save it for Mrs. Fenton, techie," she teased.
Sam and Tucker again started heading toward the exit. Danny ran after them in a slight panic.
"No!" he cried, bringing them to another stop. "No, she… She's not gonna change her mind, guys. Really, don't bother trying."
"Your mom isn't that heartless," said Sam.
"And even if she is, it's still worth a shot," said Tucker with a shrug.
They began walking again. Danny moved in front of them to block their path. "Seriously, guys, I don't want to make her even more upset."
"Well, we could at least ask if it'd be all right for us to hang out with you at your house," said Tucker.
"Yeah, she might at least let us order a pizza and watch a movie," said Sam. "And then you can be fully grounded the rest of the week!"
"No," said Danny more firmly. "No, just… It's not going to work, guys. I'm really sorry. We can do something for my birthday another day, okay?"
Sam cocked her head. "You really don't even want us to try? You've never had a problem with us trying in the past when you were grounded."
Danny said nothing. Sam and Tucker remained quiet for some time as well.
"Is there some other reason you don't want us to try talking to your mom about this?" asked Sam gently.
Danny considered his options. He couldn't keep this from them forever. What excuse would he give them next Monday when his mom came to pick him up again? Or the Monday after that?
He might as well get this over with.
"I'm, um…" He rubbed his upper arm. "My mom is… She's been making me see a…"
He knew the next word but wished he didn't have to say it. But there was no backing out now. He could see Sam and Tucker staring at him from the periphery of his vision but he still couldn't meet their gazes.
"A therapist," he finished with a small break in his voice.
Sam and Tucker were quiet a little longer, giving Danny's skin plenty of time to flood with heat.
"A therapist?" echoed Sam. "For something specific, or…?"
"Just—um—nothing really specific, honestly." Danny's skin certainly wasn't cooling down. "My mom is just worried about me—you know, like my grades and how tired I often am. And I can't tell her the real reason why I've been struggling with things the past year and a half. So as far as she can tell, I'm just a troubled teen who needs help figuring out how to deal with stress and depression. I can't exactly tell her that there is no way therapy is going to help me."
Sam and Tucker exchanged looks. And Danny didn't like them.
"But maybe it can help you, Danny," said Sam. "I mean, you have been… Well, you definitely aren't as happy as we remember you being before you got your ghost powers."
"Yeah," agreed Tucker. "I mean, um… Yeah, your problems are definitely not normal, but maybe a therapist could still give you some advice that might help you out."
Danny's heated skin was now bristling. "So you two agree that something's wrong with me? That I need professional help?"
"No, Danny," insisted Sam with a grimace. "We don't think anything's wrong with you at all. We're only saying—"
Danny shook his head. "I can't do this right now."
He power walked away and exited the school, selectively choosing not to hear Sam and Tucker if they were calling for him to come back, too agitated and humiliated to turn back even if he did hear them.
This therapy had been completely stupid so far, and now he had proof. It hadn't been a cognitive distortion at all to think his friends would agree that he needed the help if he were to tell them about therapy. Brandan had been wrong. That guy was probably wrong about everything, so why should Danny even bother?
He headed toward his mom's parked car by the curb, his limbs shaking as he yanked the car door open and dropped hard into the passenger seat.
"Danny?" Maddie frowned at him. "You doing okay?"
"I'm fine."
"You don't seem fine."
Danny shrugged. Maddie put the car in drive and pulled away from the curb.
All that could be heard for some time were the muffled traffic sounds outside the car.
"Can we just go home?" asked Danny at last.
Maddie kept her eyes on the road. "No. I'm taking you to therapy."
"But I really don't want to go to therapy, Mom."
"I know you don't. But we made a deal, remember?"
"But it's my birthday!" blurted Danny desperately. "And you've already grounded me, so can I at least just skip therapy today? Please?"
"I know it's your birthday, Danny. But it's also Monday, and we can't just reschedule."
"Then don't reschedule. Just cancel."
Maddie shot a glance at him out of the corner of her eye. "What's going on? Why are you acting like this?"
"I just—" Danny huffed. "I just really hate therapy and I don't want to go, okay? It's bad enough I can't even hang out with Sam and Tucker on my own birthday."
"And whose fault is that?" asked Maddie with a tone so stern it actually made Danny flinch.
"I…" Danny looked down at his lap. "I know I broke curfew last night, but I really didn't mean—"
"You always say you didn't mean to, and yet you keep doing it," said Maddie. "Do you really think you deserve any special favors from me? Even if it is your birthday?"
Danny kept his gaze down. Jerk. What an asshole. First he snapped at Sam and Tucker, now he was asking for favors from his own mother after upsetting her so much.
"No," he said quietly.
"It's things like this that make it all the more important that you see someone, Danny. You keep breaking my trust, and I don't know what to do with you anymore," said Maddie. "And since you won't open up to me about anything, maybe someone else can help you. Someone who knows what he's doing. A professional."
Danny hung his head. Any anger or irritation he had felt before was replaced with shame and guilt. His mother's trust was definitely not something he took lightly. All he ever wanted was to make her happy, make her proud to have him for a son.
Instead, he was a failure. Totally and completely. A terrible friend, a terrible son.
"I really am sorry," said Danny. "And you're right, I don't deserve any special favors. It's just… I really don't like therapy, and now Sam and Tucker know that I'm in therapy, which is just so embarrassing, and—"
He stopped himself. Excuses probably weren't what his mom wanted to hear right now.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm sorry for breaking curfew. I won't do it again."
Maddie switched on her turn signal and checked for cars.
"You can apologize to me by keeping up your end of the deal and actually giving therapy a fair chance," said Maddie coolly.
Danny could not find the strength to reply or even nod.
Should he really still bother giving therapy a fair chance? He knew he'd eventually break his promise not to break curfew again, possibly even this very night if there was a ghost that really needed his attention. What was one more broken promise at this point?
The car pulled up to the pizza restaurant that was situated below the therapy offices. Maddie turned off the engine and unbuckled her seat belt.
"You don't have to go up with me," said Danny quietly, handing her his phone. "I can just go up on my own, and you can pick me up later."
"No." Maddie took his phone without missing a beat and put it in her purse. "I want to make sure that you actually go and don't skip out on it."
Danny kept his eyes down, unable to look at her at all, his upper chest zinging with weighted shakiness.
Perhaps he should just resign himself to always being a major disappointment to his mother. Maybe this would all be easier if he stopped worrying about making her happy.
It wouldn't even be all that selfish. It would just be surrendering to his inability to do anything right. Why even try to be the son she wanted when it was clearly impossible?
"I wouldn't skip out on it," he insisted with a small tremor. "I just thought that...that maybe you'd rather go shopping or run an errand instead of waiting for me."
He unbuckled his seat belt and opened the car door.
"But it's okay, fine, I'll just—"
He climbed out of the car and walked swiftly toward the stairs leading up to the therapy offices. He might've heard his mother calling after him, but he didn't stop or turn to check. He didn't have a face to show her right now.
He threw open the door of the office floor and attempted to compose himself as he approached the receptionist sitting behind her desk.
"Hi." His voice cracked. He cleared his throat. "Checking in for Brandan."
"Oh, yes, of course. Danny, right?" The receptionist looked at something on her computer screen. "He'll be with you shortly. Go ahead and have a seat."
"Actually, can I use your bathroom?" Danny cleared his throat again and raised a shaking hand to his neck.
"Sure." The receptionist gestured the way. "Just right down this hall here. It'll be on your right."
Danny tried to mumble a thank-you but the words stuck. No time to try again; he had to be out of sight by the time his mom came up. He was sure he caught a glimpse of her walking in as he dashed down the hall and entered the men's restroom.
He leaned over the sink and stared down at the porcelain, gripping the edges and not allowing himself to glance up at the mirror at all. His knuckles were jittering, his elbows twitching.
He couldn't do this. He couldn't talk to that guy again. It was his birthday and his mom was mad at him and therapy was so stupid and would never help him because he didn't have normal problems. His problems were nothing like anyone on this entire planet had ever had to deal with.
He could just leave. He had that power. He could fly straight up through the ceiling and go somewhere far away.
And then what? Just never return home? Because of course his mom was going to find out he had skipped therapy, and then she'd not only never trust him again but probably force him to continue therapy for even longer.
As it was, right now, he only had to do this six more times.
He pulled in a breath and straightened up, then left the restroom. He still couldn't bring himself to face his mother in the front lobby, but perhaps he could just wait here instead. He leaned against a wall with his shaking hands in his pockets.
It wasn't long before Brandan came strolling around the corner. "Oh, Danny! I was just coming to get you. Ready?"
Danny nodded and pushed off from the wall to follow Brandan to his office, but Brandan did not move.
"You doing okay?" Brandan's head tilted as he studied Danny with a frown. "Did you cut your face?"
"It's nothing. I'm fine," said Danny quietly.
Brandan paused a moment longer before leading the way to his office. Danny shuffled behind him.
At the very least, this would make his mom happy. And even if it was his birthday, making her happy was more important to him.