Christmas Island
By
UCSBdad
Disclaimer: Merry Christmas to all of us who don't own Castle. Rating: K Time: An AU Christmas.
"Who knows what tomorrow brings,
"In a world, few hearts survive,
"All I know, is the way I feel,
"When it's real, I keep my pray alive,
"The road is long,
"There are mountains in our way,
"But we climb steps every day,
"Love lift us up where we belong,
"Where the eagles cry, on a mountain high,
"Love lift us up where we belong,
"Far from the world we know,
"Up where the clear winds blow.
As they sang, Simone began to flirt outrageously with Rick. Rick tried to escape and hide behind Kate, but Kate just laughed and moved out of the way. At the end of the song, he got his revenge by grabbing Simone and giving her a long, sloppy kiss. Again, the fans cheered.
"Kate, "Simone said, almost crying, "I did not intend for things to go that far. I was merely joking."
Kate hugged Simone.
"Don't worry about it. It's not like Rick hasn't done the same to me."
"I have not!" Rick said.
"This makes up in some small part for a certain blonde flight attendant."
Rick decided to say nothing.
"Thanks for covering for us so we could change." Curly said, coming up behind the humans. Curly was dressed differently now, as was his band. Curly usually dressed much like a human teenager with running shoes, board shorts, and a tee shirt from some rock band, topped off with a backwards baseball cap. Now, he, and the band, were dressed in highly polished oxfords, grey slacks, a white shirt with a deep blue tie, a blazer with some kind of insignia on the pocket and a straw boater hat.
"Nice look, Curly." Rick said.
"This is my new school uniform." Said the nicely dressed young Vorlag. "Do you really think it's a good look for me?"
"Sure, but since when do Vorlag high schools have uniforms?"
"Oh, I've been accepted at the prestigious Don Vorleone Engineering College, Explosives Factory, Ice Cream Parlor and FTL Racing League. We're the school's glee club. We're going to sing the Twelve Days of Christmas."
"That's a very nice song." Simone said.
"Well, we do put a Vorlag slant on the lyrics."
And with that, the Glee Club went on stage.
"On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
"A party in the pantry.
"On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
"Two turtle soups,
"And a party in the pantry.
And so they sang until the end.
"On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
"Twelve drumsticks dripping,
"Eleven lucious pies,
"Ten salmon leaping,
"Nine ladies baking,
"Eight cooks a-cooking,
"Seven swans in gravy,
"Six Big Macs,
"Five Onion Rings,
"Four roasting birds,
"Three French rolls,
"Two turtle soups,
"And a party in the pantry."
Naturally, the song was very well received.
"That was exactly what the Vorlag Twelve Days of Christmas should sound like." Rick said as Curly and the group came off the stage.
"Thank you, Mr. Castle, but if you'll excuse us, we're very hungry all of a sudden."
As it happened, all the Vorlags had worked up quite an appetite. This sometimes led to problems.
"My tummy hurts, Mrs. Castle." Cried little Timmy Vorlag as he held his tummy.
"I don't wonder." Kate said. "You came close to eating your weight in ice cream.
"My tummy hurts." Timmy repeated, beginning to cry.
"Well, here's Curly. I'm sure he can help. You can help, can't you?"
"Of course."
The young Vorlag took out some sort of instrument and passed it over Timmy's tummy.
"There. I beamed all of the ice cream away. Your tummy is fine."
"Thank you, Curly. Now I can stuff myself again." Timmy said as he ran off.
"Melissa, how did you get so much pink cake frosting in your hair?" Alexis asked the little Vorlag girl.
"I wanted to see what I'd look like as a redhead. You're a redhead and you're pretty."
Alexis smiled.
"You're pretty as well, and you look just fine with your natural hair. Now, I have hot water here and in just a few moments, the frosting will be all gone."
And in a few moments, the frosting was gone, and Melissa's hair was back to normal.
"There you go." Alexis said. "What are you going to do now?"
"Do you know where I can find some golden colored frosting?" She said as she ran off.
Once the crowd had been fed, it was time for the main event. Presents!
Don Vorleone got up on stage and spoke through mic.
"Everyone hold out your right hands."
And as everyone did, a large red bag with white trim was beamed into the hand.
"Are you ready for your presents?" The Dandy Don asked loudly.
"YES!" Everyone screamed.
"Okay, Curly. Distribute the presents."
And suddenly the bags were full. That done, Don Vorleone hopped down and went to where the Castle family and Simone were standing.
"Don Rick, would you please open your present first?" He asked.
Rick opened the present to find a bottle of some sort. The label had writing on it that he couldn't read.
"The writing is Delvian, but the important thing is that this is chemically identical to your Scotch whiskey, but it's one hundred and twenty-one years old and I believe you'll find it better than any Earth liquor you've ever had. Enjoy it in good health, Don Richard." Don Vorleone said.
"Thank you, Don Vorleone. I regret I have no present for you."
"Your help with this party is my present, Don Richard."
He then turned to Kate who opened her present to find a scarlet dress inside.
"Dona Kate, your husband says you are beautiful in any color, but that you are most beautiful in red. This dress is made from the fur of a triskell. The triskell is analogous to your sheep, except that the triskell's fur must be combed, not sheared and each triskell has hairs of every color. Several thousand triskells had to be combed to get the fur for your dress."
Kate held it up against her body.
"It's beautiful, Don Vorleone. Thank you so much."
"I can't wait to see it on you." Rick said.
"I'll bet you really can't wait to see it off me, Babe."
The Dandy Don then went to Martha.
"Dona Martha, I have some plays for you. It seems I was not the first person from my part of the galaxy to visit Earth. An expedition was here some four hundred years ago. They included a race which looks very human and with a bit of stage makeup matched perfectly. They went to London where they saw some fascinating plays and asked the author for some copies of the plays. The playwright was William Shakespeare and among the plays were three plays of his that are now lost: Love's Labor Won; Cardenio; and Edmond Ironside. I found them in a museum and after making a tax-deductible donation was allowed to purchase the three. You'll note there are notations in the Bard's own hand on all three."
Martha began to cry.
"This is amazing. Three new Shakespeare plays? I don't know how to thank you."
The Don smiled.
"You'll thank me by seeing that the plays are properly produced."
"They will be, Don Vorleone. They will be."
He then turned to Alexis. She opened her present to find a small notebook.
"Dona Alexis, if you'll look inside the notebook, you'll see instructions on how to clone human organs. Since you're studying to be a doctor, I'm sure you know it would be far easier to replace, say, a diseased liver, with one grown by the recipient."
"Thank you. Thank you so much, Don Vorleone. You'll have the thanks of everyone who's helped by this."
"Please. No publicity." He said with a smile.
Lastly, he turned to Simone.
"Dona Simone, for you I have found a rather rare record album. It was made in the very early 1920's by King Oliver's Creole Jazz Band. The unusual thing about it, and why so few copies were made, is that King Oliver and his band were African Americans, and their vocalist was a white lady from New Orleans. Very shocking in those days, I'm afraid. The records are not in the best of shape, I fear, but I had Curly clean the sound up and put everything on an iPod. Perhaps you'd like to play it for us? Curly enabled much better speakers than are usually found."
Simone looked like she was going to cry but turned on the iPod. They could hear Simone's French accented singing as she sang Lord You Made the Night Too Long.
"You made the river flow,
"The flowers grow,
"You made the weak and the strong.
"But Lawd, you made the night too long,
"You made the robin sing,
"A song of Spring,
"And me you gave a lonely song,
"Oh Lawd, that's why the night's so long.
Simone was crying as she hugged Don Vorleone.
"Merci, merci beaucoup, Vorlagfather. This means so much to me."
"And now, dear friends, there's one more thing to do. Dona Kate and Don Richard, if you'll join me on the stage?"
Someone handed Don Vorleone the mic and he began speaking.
"As you know, this party was originally supposed to have been held in the Caribbean. However, circumstances beyond my control prevented that."
Don Vorleone glared at Da Boyz who assumed an air of injured innocence that they had pretty much perfected. However, the Don went on.
"As part of the Caribbean party I had planned a Papa Hemingway Write Alike Contest and decided to go ahead and hold it here in French Polynesia. There has been a tie for the win and the two winners are here with us, Dona Kate Castle and her husband, Don Rick Castle. Rick, will you please read your entry?"
Rick took the mic and began to read.
"Kilimanjaro is a snow-covered mountain 19,710 feet high and is said to be the highest mountain in Africa. Its western summit is called by the Masai "Ngàje Ngài," the House of God. Close to the western summit there is the dried and frozen carcass of a cougar. No one has explained what the cougar was seeking at that altitude, but since Gina is carrying a martini glass, we can make assumptions."
There was a polite smattering of applause.
"Dona Kate, will you read your entry."
"Castle shot Demming. In the rain. With the Mauser. He died. It was good. They talked about the besbol."
When she was done, Rick was in tears.
"That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. You win, Kate."
Don Vorleone smiled. It was good.
"I think that we should allow the children time to play with their toys. Would you care to join me and have a drink?"
"My dear Don, please let's all go into my house and relax.
The friends relaxed and in a few hours, it was time for all the children to be beamed back to Don Vorleone's base on the Moon for transit by spaceships to their homes. Once they were gone, Don Vorleone bid farewell to Rick, Kate, Martha, Alexis and Simone and then was beamed away. Then the Castle family was whisked back to their loft in Manhattan.
"I wonder what next Christmas will bring?" Kate asked. "The one in December?"
"Something fun and furry I'm betting." Rick replied.
THE END
Author's note: Next up is Castle's Tanks, a sequel to Castle's Platoon and Castle's Troop. This time mercenary soldier Rick Castle and his platoon of Tarkai scouts have to deliver a company's worth of armored vehicles being sold by their brigade. What could possibly go wrong?
Merry Christmas to one and all from UCSBdad and all of Vorlag Nation.