Disclaimer: Naruto and its characters do not belong to me, they belong to Masashi Kishimoto

-Chapter Eleven-

Man In The Mirror

The office was dark. Too dark to even see in. Curtains were blocking any moonlight from gaining entry. There weren't even any candles in the room. In a fit of rage the man sitting behind the desk had thrown them out the door. He couldn't bear to even look at himself right now. In the dark like this, he felt like he didn't exist at all. The perfect solution.

So there he was, in total blackness waiting for…something. All he could do is wonder at how they'd ended up here. There was no question that he wanted peace. Wanted it for both Sakura and Izuna. Yet, his brother did everything in his power to make sure a treaty wouldn't occur. If only he hadn't been in enough of a mood to end up playing along.

After giving it some thought, Madara decided it must have been the last day he saw Sakura. That's when it started. Izuna's plan and his own misery. At the moment he would give practically anything to go back to that day. He'd stop her from leaving or follow her. Find out where she lived. At least that much.

Then he would be able to locate her. It has been weeks since he saw her and she didn't even say anything about his desire to marry her. Either something had happened to her or…she'd run away. At this point he didn't know which he preferred.

She never stayed away this long. For eight years they haven't gone a month without seeing each other, though sometimes it was only for a minute. Now he had to face the fact that he barely knew anything about her outside of the time they spent together.

From the beginning he came to assume she was from a merchant's family, with a male guardian. Only now did he start to doubt his assumption. After her long disappearing act, he'd scoured the land of fire. Made sure to ask every merchant he came across if they knew of a girl with pink hair.

No one even heard of such a thing. The one lead he had was of a traveling civilian couple people had seen years ago. The wife was said to have had a pinkish strawberry blonde hair while her husband had a fiery red. They had a son who had dull pink hair. The Haruno family.

The couple having a little girl was never mentioned. Not exactly what he was looking for. He looked into it anyway and heard about two civilians who were found dead just on the boarder of Senju land. Either bandits or the Senju had gotten to them because no self-respecting Uchiha would do that. Everything turned out to be a dead end.

Madara couldn't believe she was able to disappear without a trace, but she'd done it. She was impossible to track with no trail to follow. It felt like he would never see her again. His frustrations were mounting along with a horribly insecurity that hadn't bothered him in years.

Usually he made it through the day just fine but late at night, while he was attempting to sleep, his mind raced. He was hurting right in his heart and it was killing him. With no body surfacing, he was fairly sure Sakura was alive. No one bothered to bury their kills anymore.

Discovering her body would have been worse, so he welcomed this pain. Anything was better than that. Even not seeing her anymore. Thus he could only wonder at why she wasn't appearing before him while he searched for her.

Izuna used his frustration against him. The scene from the battle field flickered across his eyelids and he scowled. He jumped out of his chair and paced the dark room from memory. The Senju hadn't been bothering them lately. Pulling out like Hashirama said they would. It helped that Madara hadn't shown his face in the field.

Showing up to a small skirmish where there was no one of his caliber present to stop him reeked of aggression. So he stayed away, as did Hashirama. It was going well until a group of five Senju were eliminated while traveling on their own land. Trespassing and murder.

Hashirama was forced to act and all evidence lead to the Uchiha. There was no doubt in his mind that it was Izuna. Just like him, he'd been losing his mind. Just in a different way. He wanted to hunt the Hyuuga but didn't want a treaty with the Senju. Or even a cease fire. Their father had twisted his mind so much that he was willing to sacrifice more Uchiha to the war.

Nothing mattered to his brother except not 'admitting defeat' to the Senju. Going into the battle he'd known it was all Izuna's doing but he hadn't realized just how far he was willing to go. For all intents and purposes it was a normal fight, though an intense one. Hashirama had even brought Toka out to play.

He only ever saw that woman during a really major battle. Normally, she kept to the shadows, dealing with important matters that took a small highly specialized unit. He'd never paid much attention to her beyond the times Izuna mentioned her. His little brother absolutely hated the sight of the woman.

She often tagged teamed him with Tobirama. Just when he thought he was tiring the white haired bastard out, she'd step in. Drove him crazy. It always gave Madara a good laugh. Mostly because she still stubbornly tried to use genjutsu on them. It never worked on Izuna but others of their clan had fallen victim to the female warrior.

Everything had been going normally until Toka left Tobirama's side, a group of Uchiha leading her farther and farther away. Then Izuna suddenly jacked up his ferociousness level by several degrees, seemingly trying to go for the kill. This new speed he was devoting so much chakra to would be impossible to maintain for very long.

The younger Senju sibling was holding his own, using his sensory skills to track him. This display of strength drew everyone's attention, even Hashirama's and his own. Their collisions lowered but didn't fully stop, giving less than half their focus to their brothers. By now they were used to their erratic behavior.

This time was different though. Just as Toka began to make her way back to them, Izuna's speed dropped dramatically. It happened right as Tobirama staged a, now, lethal attack as Madara's and Hashirama's jutsu were about to clash. Suddenly, the brunet darted off towards the younger Uchiha, his wood release shifting to head right for him.

His eyes bleed red, turning straight into the mangekyō sharingan. Those Senju bastards were planning to team up to take his brother out. He expected better from Hashirama. How could he? This was unbelievable. There was no way he'd let them succeed. He started to swing his gunbai towards the offenders, hoping to knock them away from each other with a shot of wind.

The distance was wide and the wind powerful. It would have been nothing harmful, Izuna was in the way after all. Yet instead of it being a wide spread attack, Toka came out of nowhere and jumped in front of it. The wind ended up turning into a condensed strike as it released pressed up against her stomach.

Her scream of agony made bile rise in his throat because he didn't mean to do that. He saw her clothes rip, saw skin tear and expose her innards. He saw what he had done, just as everyone else did, including Hashirama, whose wood release had formed a wall to block Tobirama's sword and water jutsu that was aimed at Izuna.

It was a misunderstanding. A horrible misunderstanding because he could see from the look on the brunet's face that he did not understand. Hadn't seen the woman take her own life at the end of his gunbai. This wasn't his choice dammit! She'd made it for him.

Eyes going back to black, they moved from Hashirama's aghast expression to Izuna, only to see something far more terrible. His brother was smiling and it occurred to him then that this was planned. Maybe it hadn't gone exactly as the younger man thought it would, but the end result was just as good.

There was no time to think about this as the Senju were ordered to retreat. The wounded were grabbed and dragged away. Toka was taken by Hashirama and his brother. The former's chakra surrounded the injury, trying to keep her alive until they made it back to their compound.

He ordered the Uchiha to let them go. Izuna was not happy with that demand. In an instant there was a snarling face shoved into his own. "Why would you let them escape?! We had them! They were shaken up, a perfect opportunity to gain the advantage. We could have killed them."

As he looked down into the twisted features of his sibling's face he realized that this wasn't his brother. Not the one he remembered. Izuna was endlessly kind and he cared about everyone. He'd been the one the clan had to watch carefully because he was overly friendly with the merchants, a perfect target for a kidnapping. A boy much too naïve. Now he was this snarling man in front of him. He should have stopped this much sooner than he had.

Over the years he'd watched his father corrupt him and done nothing to stop it. His brother had went from caring about everyone equally to only caring about Uchiha. There was less smiling at merchants and more glaring at his surroundings. Then their father had moved to localize that wariness to the Senju and increase its intensity to hatred.

This was his fault. His failure, and he couldn't stand to look at it. In front of his clansman, his hand swung outward and he slapped Izuna across the face. Afterwards there was silence, but he could hear the ringing in his ear from the sound of the smack. Even now as he traced the outline of his office in the dark, he swore he could still hear it.

Only in a spar had he ever attacked his sibling and never in such a disrespectful manner. A slap was far more indignant than a punch would have been. Izuna was speechless and unable to continue the argument. The rest of the clan was anxious about his behavior, feeling as if he was sidling with the Senju over the Uchiha. In the state the clan was in now, a peace treaty would be improbable. They would think he was signing their rights away. For now his plans had to be put on hold.

Suddenly, there was a knock on his door. Believing it was more bothersome people trying to check on him, he barked at them to leave him be. A muffled voice answered him. "If you think I'm leaving anytime soon you can eat a shoe."

Izuna! His whole body turned to face the door as he considered opening it. Could he face his brother after what he had done to the younger man? More importantly, could Madara look into his eyes and not want to do the same thing again?

He supposed this would be a chance he had to take. Asking him what had happened on the battlefield was priority. This could just be a misunderstanding. With that possibility in mind, he unlocked the door and let the teenager in. Barely any light came in, and it was still difficult to see. Standing in the middle of the room, they faced off.

He crossed his arms across his chest and stared down at the slightly shorter man. "Did you plan that?" One eyebrow raised questioningly, but by the look on his face the boy knew exactly what he was talking about. He was just ignoring the whole thing.

"You should really eat. Locking yourself away in this room doesn't do anything for you." Black eyes scanned the office, taking in the mess he'd made when he had swept his arm across his desk in fury hours, days, ago. He wasn't sure anymore. As far as sleeping or eating went he'd done none of that, but that wasn't a very good gauge of time for him.

In the past, while he was on the frontlines, he had gone three weeks with no more than ten hours of sleep. Three day cycles of battling and keeping watch ending in only an hour or two of rest. He could keep his body going on just an apple and a few sunflower seeds a day for a week straight. However long it had been since he'd left this room it was nothing in comparison to that.

Clearly Izuna was worried for nothing. He was just deflecting the conversion away from his question. Reaching out he grabbed his brother by his shirt, pulling him in closer. "I asked if you had anything to do with what went down out there?!"

Izuna cautiously raised his hands to wrap his fingers around his older brother's wrists. "If I tell you again, will you please eat?"

It was only then that Madara noticed the true concern concealed in his expression and the delicate hold around his wrists. In no way did he like this treatment, glaring to show just that. "What do you mean again? And I'll eat whenever the hell I want."

His mouth tightened but then he sighed, as if life had exhausted him. "Okay, fine. At least I know where your head is at right now." He released his hold on his brother and then pulled the hands gripping his shirt away. "It's been three years since the battle you're remembering. You are twenty-four years old."

This was met with an obvious disbelieving scoff and he took a few steps back to distance himself from his crazy younger sibling. "Please you need to eat, just look at yourself!" Izuna threw his arm out towards the side and he followed the motion with his eyes. He found a mirror hung on the wall that he didn't remember hanging there.

It was too dark in the room to really make anything out in it besides an outline of their shapes. Izuna raked his hand through his hair with a mumbled curse. He walked out to the hall, picking up one of the candles that was laying on the ground and lit it. Madara jerked back as if he'd been stung, covering his eyes as he hissed in pain at the sudden light.

As he adjusted to this change, he lowered his hands slowly, gaze automatically switching to the mirror. He looked at it with revulsion. The image in that mirror couldn't be his own, it just couldn't. The man in the mirror was unnaturally pale, his face gaunt, with his clothes hanging off of him like rags. Hair hung lifelessly from his head. This wasn't him, it wasn't him.

His hands went to the bottom of his shirt and lifted it. The man in the mirror followed suit. His ribs were visible. He let his shirt fall back down and turned towards his brother. As he did so he noticed that he couldn't see him that well with the candle he was holding blurring the edges of his vision. "What happened?"

Izuna considered this for a moment. "That day or how you ended up like this?" Eyes narrowed to try and see him better along with anger. "Okay, alright. Both. Just sit down." Reluctantly, feeling as if his knees would give out otherwise, he listened to his younger brother and sat down behind his desk.

"Three years back I thought we'd be able to take out Tobirama, shake Hashirama up and take down the Senju." Izuna settled himself down in a chair across from him after picking it up from the floor. He must have knocked it down sometime earlier. "I knew if it looked like he was going to get the better of me, you'd intervene. What I didn't expect was Hashirama or Toka to get involved. They ruined everything."

So he'd been right. His brother had stopped moving of his own volition to lure him into saving him. It sickened him. That Toka woman had suffered a horrible death thanks to him falling right into the plan. No, no. He couldn't concern himself with that right now, he needed to know the rest.

"After that you were okay. You spent maybe two, three days in here, but emerged in one piece." Then why the hell was he like this right now! "Now now. Put those eyes away. I'm getting to it." He fidgeted in his seat, uncomfortable talking about such things. "It was almost a year before you started to behave strangely. You would get unreasonable angry over the smallest things. Then you told me about her."

The last word was said with an almost bitter feel. He clearly blamed what was happening to him on this girl he spoke of. He was pretty sure he knew who he was talking about. "Sakura."

Izuna leaned forward in his seat. "Forget about her already! She is long dead. No matter how much you search you haven't found anything." Three years and Sakura still hasn't shown up. If this was true she probably was dead. To hide for that long without ever leaving a clue was impossible. Civilians had nowhere to hide from them. "Soon after you had your first lapse."

"First?"

He nodded, "Yeah…it was bad. You looked worse than you do now and you actually collapsed. Then you recovered." If that was the case why was he like this now?! "After that you were good for a while, but then we lost a large amount of people to the Hyuuga warfront." He scratched his head and turned his eyes away. "Every time this happens it is always the result of some mental shift."

Madara kicked the desk as he stood. "Are you telling me I don't cope well?!"

Izuna stood up right along with him. "Yes! This most recent one is because…your vision is going." He staggered backwards, not prepared for that information. His neck snapped to the right and then to the left, taking in everything in the room. Things were blurry. It wasn't the darkness or the light making it hard for him to see. His eyes were going.

Why?! The sharingan was supposed to be a superior form of eyesight. He's never heard of an Uchiha's sight going before. "Brother, it's the result of the mangekyō."

The mangekyō, the new version of the sharingan that only the two of them possessed. "Your sight…"

"I'm not fairing any better. Actually my sight is a bit worse than yours." There was a moment of silence before Izuna smiled and started to head to the door. "We'll have to live with it. Let's get some food in you now. God knows how much stress you have put on your body with this constant up and down."

He didn't get the chance to say anything before his brother disappeared. Sluggishly, he lowered himself back into his seat, feeling as if the weight of the world was on his shoulders. His mental fragmentation was probably because of lack of nutrition, sleep, and socialization. Once he got some of each he'd be in his right mind.

His eyes caught the glint of the mirror in the candlelight. The man in the mirror was him, but he wouldn't ever let it be again. As he leaned back and closed his eyes he wondered how many time he'd told himself that before.

Honestly, I only decided a few hours ago as I was writing this that Madara would be confused. In the beginning it was only supposed to have been a few hours or days since the battle. Then this happened. I changed a few things after I made that decision. Including taking Sakura's part of this chapter out as hers was from before the skip.